«4M
A Real "H om ” Race.
you would see a horse strapped,
id. braced and geared to the limit
bust seek sticli a track as you see
|e old time country fair. Here
I an awkward flea bitten gray
I never went under 2:50 tn his
I He Is hobbled and checked and
led and hitched up sidewise,
Invise and crosswise until there
re harness than horse. You won
tow his driver ever got him Into
figging and how he will get him
►gain without cutting him free
la Jackkntfe. A farmer with a
beard and twinkling eye observes
I neighbor:
kt time John Martin had that
put on the road I told him he had
bl cripple overloaded with fust
Jo the injured. Them straps that
tai'la ted to hoist up his knees
pa' pulled too tight, and the crit
hs yanked clean off the ground.
[John was gettln’ ready for was
| for (lyin' machines, not a boss
t-David Lansing in Outing Maga-
Dina Moe and Dina Mite.
Cracker, a young colored gentle-
f our city, bad Just obtained em-
knt in one of our department
as an experienced porter, but
It short time proved to be unfit
► position. Being fired, he there-
hed the nickname of Fire Crack-
Ire Cracker was deeply In love
| young woman of his own race
name of Miss Moe and after a
Acquaintance found that her sur-
was Dina. He went to Dina
Id said:
a Moe, does you lub me?”
julckly replied, “No.”
¡being disheartened and at the
pme remembering the motto he
I at school, "If at first you don't
d try, try again,” he went to
loe again and said:
k Moe, could you learn to lub
HI« Shave and Hi« Narva.
A youth with untouched face walked
slowly past a barber shop, then back
again, then passed and repassed, each
time drawing nearer and nearer. Fi
nally, as though he bad Just redbed
a determination, he turned In and hand
ed his hat, coat and collar to the offi
ciating "shine.” When it came hie
turn be got Into the chair with an air
of assurance which was rather out of
keeping with his haunted eyes.
"Hair cut?” queried the barber.
“Naw: shave,” said the youth. “Just
once ov »r, and be kind o’ careful of the
neck whisker.”
The barber put his hand over his face
to hide a grin and went to his lather
cup. He turned on the hot water and
passed a wink down the line until ev
ery barber had his gaze that way.
Then, with ponderous care, he lathered
the face and coolly began shaving hie
customer with the back of the razor.
"Does she pull?” he asked after •
bit.
leetle raw,” said the customer,
with fine discrimination. "Got a wire
edge, hasn’t It?”
The barber replied by stropping bls
own band violently, then resumed
shaving with the back of the razor.
“How’s that?” he said.
“Fine as silk,” said the customer,
now grown veteran. “I tell you It’s all
In the stropping, Jack.”—Baltimore
News.
Self Winding Watches.
“Watchmaking is no longer what it
used to be,” said a collector. “Where
will you find today artists making and
selling readily watches worth $2,500
apiece? Brequet was the greatest
watchmaker the world has ever seen.
He was a Swiss, but he lived In
France. The watch collector who
hasn't a Brequet timepiece has a sad
ly Incomplete collection.
Brequet
watches were the acme of beauty, of
originality and of accuracy.
One
played a tune every hour, another had
on its dial little figures that danced, a
this time rolled the white
third was a self winder. They were
>s and, looking Fire Cracker
very ingenious, those self winding
!, answered:
watches. They worked on the pedom
l—Mite!"—Judge’s Library.
eter principle. The motion of the
body In walking kept them wound. I
I Snapdragon Seed Pods.
have a Brequet self winder, and some
■antirrhinum, or snapdragon, Is times, out of curiosity, I carry It for a
■ the old fashioned garden flow- week. My stride winds It, It never
■own by every one. Although It runs down, and It keeps, after all these
fasltor from southern Europe, It years, fairly good time.”—New York
■en here so long that it has be- Press.
■ naturalized.
When we say
I mouth,” ‘‘frog’s mouth,” ‘‘calf’s
Tho Address on the Letter.
L” ‘‘rabbit’s mouth,” we mean
“It Is not spelling alone that has
ragon, all these names being sug- been smitten by the hand of the de
I by Its grotesque masklike corol- stroyer,” lamented the postman. “Punc
|ut there is something still more tuation has also gone by the board.
■que if we will wait till the seed When I first began to handle United
land gather the dried, brown States mall ten years ago the direc
|0n of the seed pod. Look at tions on envelopes were punctuated
tideways, under a bright lamp- according to schoolbook rules. Abbre
r possible, and you will find they viations were finished off with a pe
nuite a resemblance to a rhlnoc- riod. names were followed by a comma,
I Remove the calyx and the llt- and so so. Now the envelope that Is
rns on the nose and look at them properly punctuated is a rarity. Some
¡the front, and they have a still times, Just out of curiosity, I take time
[striking resemblance to human to look carefully through a bunch of
L and by turning them about you letters. Out of, say, twenty, more than
II sorts of queer expressions on half will be entirely destitute of punc
tuation marks. In the few cases where
ttnfiing mouth.—St. Nicholas.
an attempt has been made to punctu
ate hysterical dashes take the place
Hurry.
pur own age belongs the credit of the periods and commas that once
lying raised hurry from the de- prevailed.”—New York Globe.
d position of a disease to that of
Proof of His Innocence.
Itnerclal process. Formerly bur-
A southern negro was brought into
pply brought people to an early
| with nothing to show for it, ■the courtroom, accused of stealing a
►as now it is become the means neighbor’s chickens.
"Mister George Washington Shin-
Insformlng peace of mind, which
bleclsm, to say the best of It, into topp, did you steal those chickens?”
money. Hurry has grown to be asked the Judge pointedly.
"No, Bah, Jedge. Ah Is toe 'spectable
pt fact in life. Even the fash-
Hike account of it until women to’ dat.”
"But It is stated on good authority
bund doing up their hair in such
r that they may go the speed 11m- that a bundle ot feathers was found
thout fear of its coming down, in your back yard the day before
the best of hurry is that it is Its Christmas.”
"Dat 'sinneration, jedge, des proves
sufficient Justification. Nobody
ts burry to have any particular mah Innocence, coz how could de fed
o behind it any more.—R. B. In ders be found In mah back yard de
day befo’ Chris'mus when mah wife
York Life.
didn’t pluck dose chickens until de day
after Chris’mus?"—Circle.
Preposterous.
■god Jersey farmer visiting a cir-
A Queer Argument.
lor the first time stood before the
It Is often urged that eloquence and
bdary's cage, eyes popping and
affectation are inalienable, but I main
ii agape at the strange beast
h. The circus proper began, and tain that the peculiar pronunciation of
certain words—if that constitutes af
towds left for the main show, but
fectation—is a pardonable fault, of
the old man stood before the cage
which many eminent orators are them
Inned silence appraising every de-
selves guilty. In vast cathedrals and
•f the misshapeu legs, the cloven large halls where the acoustic proper
L the pendulous upper lip and the
ties are of an unusual order It is clear
bsly mounded back of the sleepy ly manifest that some pronunciations
beast. Fifteen minutes passed. are preferable to others, for some
I the farmer turned away and spat words by the very composition of their
■tedly.
syllables are not so far reaching in
lucks! They ain't no such ani- their sound as others, so that If a ruse
f—Everybody's Magazine.
is adopted to gain the desired effect
surely It ts detrimental to no one.—
Not His Usual Brand,
London Academy.
wis a waff from the slums, hav-
Ils first experience of the country,
Putting In tho Sting.
[ gave him a new laid egg at
Clara—I understand that Mr. Feath-
(fast as a great treat, but after erley paid me a very pretty compli
bpoonful he put it quietly aside ment today? Ethel—Yes. What was
fl* oted himself to the bread and It? Clara—He said that among the
most beautiful young ladles at the par
ty was Miss Clara Smith. Ethel (with
a cough)—Yes, I noticed you among
them.—London Mall.
Attracting Attention.
"When ordering champagne some
people are not satisfied with the pop of
the cork.”
“No?”
“No; tbey think the waiter ought to
also fire a pistol.”—Washington Her
ald.
Read Letter Days.
Dissolving Mergers,
“Most people hare red letter days
ro churches here now,
once in a while." observed the pretty
only boasted
she put the pe-
girl sweetheart,
lat's right.”
vised missive back in Its envelope,
iu must have bad a revival.
"but every day Is a read letter day for
>; we had a split”—Washington me“—Norristown Times.
A Wasp's Mistake.
It Is generally supposed that Instinct
unerringly teaches birds and luseets
the beat way in which to build their
homes or nests agd also to provide for
their offspring. The * following inci
dent will show that instinct la not al
ways infallible:
A naturalist placed three small emp
ty vials in an open box on a shelf in
an upright position tn clone contact,
and they were uncorked. A short time
afterward it was a matter of surprise
to find that these had been appropri
ated by a female mud wasp. She bad
placed a goodly number of spiders in
the center vial, doubtless intended to
serve as food for her future brood,
then proceeded to deposit her eggs in
those on either side. She next closed
tightly the mouths of all the recepta
cles with a hard lime cement. Having
finished her work, she then doubtless
went on her way, satisfied all had been
done for her offspring that a thought
ful mother could do. But Just think
of the sensations of those little wasps
when they come into existence, for,
while starving in their sealed cages,
they can plainly seo through the im
penetrable glass walls the bountiful
supply of food which was provided for
their use.
Sho Thought Ho Was Dead.
Maglnnls bad been ill for «orne time,
and, like a great many Invalid«, be
was somewhat Irritable, and when
things failed to meet his approval the
next unfortunate who came witbin
range was pretty apt to be reminded
of It in a way far more forcible than
polite. He lingered In this condition
for several weeks, dally growing weak
er, but still holding bls own sufficient
ly to make things lively and more or
less Interesting for those about him.
Finally one day when the family doc
tor called be met the long suffering
Mrs. Maglnnls coming out of the sick
room, and, rubbing bls bands, he cheer
ily remarked: “Ah, good morning, Mr*.
Maglnnls! How Is our patient today?”
“It’s dead the poor mon Is, O’lm
afther thinkin’, hlvln rlst his aowl!"
was the resigned reply.
“You think he is dead? Don't you
know whether he Is or not?” demand
ed the doctor.
“Not fer shure,” responded Mrs. Ma-
glnnls briskly, “but thin he bethrays
lvery symptom of It. I wlnt Into hla
room Jlst now, an'.he didn't t'row any
thing at me!"—London Tit-Bits.
Snuff as Medicin«.
“Oh, yes,” said the tobacconist, as be
tapped a Jar filled with a cinnamon col
ored powder, “I sell an ounce or two of
snuff occasionally—to the old, as a
rale. The young will seldom look at
snuff. And those who do use it Im
pute medicinal virtues to It. Thus old
fashioned watchmakers, gem cutters
and tailors think that a pinch of snuff
now and then Improves the eyesight
They think It refreshes and fortifies
weary eyes as a cup of tea refreshes
and fortifies a weary brain. Others
think snuff cures a cold. Others take
it for the- headache. Others still be
lieve that It wards off contagion. Per
sonally I believe that snuff taking la
less harmful than smoking. Its effect
too, Is pleasanter than the effect of
smoking—It Is a most Boothing and
fascinating effect once you get used to
It—but the habit Is untidy and there
fore It can get no hold upon us in this
aesthetic age.”—Los Angeles Times.
HEADQUARTERS FOR
DAIRYMEN’ AND
S SUPPLIES
We carry a Large Stock of
Hardware,
Tinware, Glass
Oils, Paint, Varnish, Doors, Window
Sashes,
McNAIR CO.
ALEX
The Most
Reliable Merchants in Tillamook County
T imber L and , act J vmb ,, I878.— N otice ro
P ublication .
Lost, a Scotch Coolie, seven months
old, strayed from the city early in De
cember. Answers the name of Don ”
Color, sable and white. Persons know
ing the wherenbouts of the dog will no
tify E. E. Tyler, Tillamook, Ore.
One Heifer Calf. Partv can have same
bv describing property and paving tor
advertisement.
J ack J ennings , Keichis.
,01 Interest To Women.
ITo such women as are not seriously c i|
Of heal till bat w ho have exacting dut.es
to perform, either in the way of house-
held cares\or In social duties and func«
tiSoe ihichXserlously tax their strength,
as well Js»p\urslngmothers,Dr. Pi'-ce’:i
Tiption has proved a most
Favorite
valuable sup |rtIng tonic and Invigorat-
It« tlrr'dv «iso. i .ne!.
Ing nervine. By
______
n..~"
fcrlous sickness ~ and__ ____________
avoided. The operating ti.hle ai'i: 11
«urgeons’ knife, wouiu. it_
Seldom have to_be en ployoo ff. ts me-
valuable womanls r'jihedv"v -ti- -uuu—:
to in go« d time. The"Favor te Prescrip
Notice of Appointment of Execu
tors.
N otice is H ereby G iven , —That Thomas
Roberts, Annie Roberts and Blaine Hays
have been appointed executors of the estate
of ELLA R HAYS, deceased. All persons
having elaims against said estate are hereby
required to present them, with the proper
vouchers, within six months from the date
of this notice, to the above named executors,
at the office of Carl Ilabcrlach, Attorney-at-
Law, at his office, Tillamook City, Oregon.
Dated this 8th day of January, 1908.
T homas R oberts , A nnie R oberts and
B laine H ays ,
Executors
of the estate of ELLA
K. HAY8, deceased.
THE WORLDS GREATEST SEWING MACHINE
k JJGHT RUNNING
Rescued a "Foxy” 8qulrrel.
A man in New York state who owns
several fine cats stepped out of his
house one day to see two of his feline
possessions crouched tn the grass, and
equidistant between them sat a com
mon striped squirrel, not daring to
move a hair lest he invite the sharp
claws of one or both of his enemies,
but the anxious brown eyes rolled from
side to side as he calculated his chances
of escape between the two. The man
walked on toward the squirrel, and
when he came within Jumping distance
the squirrel seized bis opportunity and
leaped upon the man's trousers and
ran nimbly to bls shoulder. Then the
man backed slowly toward a tree at
no great distance from him. Again
when within leaping distance the
squirrel Jumped Into the tree and dis
appeared amid Its branches.
STEVENS
England'« Ona Protestant Cathedral.
Truro cathedral is the only Estab
lished Church cathedral of any impor
tance which has been built since 8t.
Paul’s was completed by Sir Chrlato-
pber Wren. All the great cathedrals
and abbeys tn England were erected
by Catholics and were handed over by
act of parliament in the reign of Hen
ry VIII. to the Protestants when the
Catholic church was established and
the Protestant rellgicn created by law.
—Reynolds' Newspaper.
YOU LOOK FOR TROUBLE
■ jfd If you obtain a Firearm of doubt-
t I
f“l flO'll'l
The experienced Hunter's and
^ar^5man • Ideal
M r
1 I
rel‘able, unerring STEVEN3
FIND OUT WHY
by shooting our popular
J/JI RIFLES-SHOTGUNS
f /]
PISTOLS
F • Jr HM
your local Hardware
wjl or ^porting Goods Mer-
chant for the STEVENS.
' Ar w NBM If you 'an not obtain, we
•**ip direct, exprena prt>.
P,l*«l, upon receipt of Lata
Mog Price.
CHAS. I. CLOUGH
Reliable Druggist,
Tillamook, Orc.
Ever) thing first-class.
Second
HARRIS, Prop.
J
United State» Land office,
Portland, Oiegon. Oct. 31st, 1907.
Notice is hereby given that in compliance
w it>V the provisions of the act of Congress of
June 3, 1878, entitled "An act for the sale ol
timber lands in the 8tates of California, Ore
gon, Nevada and Wa hington Territory," as
extended to all the Pub ic l<and States by act of
August 4, 1892,
HUGO KLEIN.
Of Nehalem, county of Tillamook, State of
Oregon, has this day filed in ibis office hia
sworn statement, No. 7611, for the purchase
of the Ne,Vi of Sec. No. 11, iu township No. 2
north, Range No. io West, and will offer
proof to show
that the
land sought
is more valuable for its timber or at< tie
than for
agricultural purposes,
and to
establish his claim to said land before the
United States Land Office, at Portland, Oregon,
on Tuesday, the 28th day of January, I908.
He names as witnesses :
William H. Kffenbcrger, of Nehalem, Tilla
mook County, Oregon ; J. R Hicks, of Ne
halem, Tillamook County. Oiegon ; H. E.
Effenberger, of Nehalem, Tillamook County,
Oregon ; Oscar Bergman, of Nehalem, Tilla
mook County, Oregon.
Any and all persons claiming adversely the
above described lands are requested to file their
claims in this office on or before said 28th day
of January, I908.
A lgernons . D rkhser , Register.
T imber L and , A ct jure 3, 1878.— N otice
P ublication .
fob
United States Land Office.
Portland, Oregon, Oct. 81st, loOT.
Notice is hereby given that in compliance
with the provisions of the act of Coi grrss of
June 8,1878. ent'tled “An act for the side of
timber lands iu the States of California, Oiegon,
Nevada and Washington Territory," as ex
tended to all the Public Land States by act of
August 4, 1892,
WILLIAM H. KFFENBERGKR,
Of Nehalem, county of Tillamook, Htate of
Oiegon, lias this day filed in this office his
sworn statement N ». 7612, for the purchase
of the W
of Sw
of Sec I and K
of He % of
Sec. No 2, in Tp. No. 2 north, Range No. 10
west of W.M..and will offers proof to show
that the land sought is more valuable for
its timber (Or stone than for agricultural
fiuiposes, and to establish his claim to said
and before the United States Land Office, at
Portland, Oregon, on Wednesday, the 29th
day of Januaiy, 1908. He names as witnesses :
Hugo Klein, of Nehalein, Tillamo >k County,
Oregon ; J. R. Hicks, ot Nehalem, Tillamook
County, Oregon; H. E. Effenberger, of Nehalem,
Tillamook County; Oregon ; Oscar Bergman,
of Nehalem, Tillamook County, Oregon.
Any and all persons claiming adversely the
above-deM*ril>«dlands are requested to file their
claims in thia office on or before said 29th day of
January, I908.
A lgernon S. D rhhhkr , Register.