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About Klamath republican. (Klamath Falls, Or.) 1896-1914 | View Entire Issue (Sept. 17, 1903)
(here is only one way to get rid of
IplcH and other eruptions.
[nd it’s simple and easy enough.
Fleanae the blotd, improve the diges-
p, stimulate the kidneys, liver and
n, by the same means at the same
The tin dieinc t<* take is
>4tis statement is confirmed by the ex-
g&rienee of thousands whom this niedi-
<ne has I* rmanently cured. •
[Accept no substitute.
No Bother Whatever.
1 "Do yon have any trouble with the
plants when your wife goes away?”
asked tha hatchet-facet! man, sadly.
jf’N’one whatever,” replied the cheerful
jebap. “they always die within a week
(after she leaves and all I have to do is
Ito put them away until she comes
t back.”—Cincinnati Commercial Trib-
CITS Permanently Cured, Wo fite or nervouaneoa
111V after firat day's use of Dr. K line’s Great Nerro
Restorer. Send for FreeS'A trial bottle and treat too.
Dr.JL H. Kline, Ltd- Ml Arch St. Philadelphia. Pa.
The cold in a cavern in France is so
great, no matter how warm lire ex
ternal atmosphere may be, the visitor
cannot prolong his stay without incon
venience unless wrapped in winter
clothing. There are not less than
score of these natural icehouses in
France and probably half as many in
local applications, as they cannot reach the
diseased portion of the ear. There ia only one
way to cure dewiness, and that is by constitu
tional remedies. Deal nets is caused by an in
tamed condition of the mucous lit ig of the
Bustarhian Tube. When this tube ^ets in
flamed you have a rumbling sound or imper
fect hearing, and when it is entirely closed
deafness is th»» result, and unlees the inflamma
tion can be taken out and this tube restored to
Its normal condition, hearing will be destroyed
forever; nine oases out oi ten are caused by
catarrh, which is nothing but an inflamed
condition of the mucous surfaces.
We will give One Hundred Dollars for any
ease of Deainess icaused by catarrh) that can
not be cured by Hall s Catarrh Cure. Bend for
F. J. CHENEY & CO.. Toledo, O
Sold by Druggists. 75c
Hall's Family Pills are the best.
The Abilene Democrat tells of a man
who stop|>«d over night in a small town
near the;« and registered at the hotel
pointed out to him by the conductor as
the best in town. In the morning he
wanted to take a bath and consulted
the preprietor about it. The proprie
tor ahouted back to the rear: "Here,
Tom, this here gent wants to take a
bath. Bring the fixin's.” Toni soon
appeared, carrying a cako of yellow
soan, a towel and a pick. “What’s
the piik for?” asked the guest.
“Why,” said the proprietor; "you’ll
have to dam up the ctcek."—Kansas
Got Tired ot the Oan.
A Clay county man, says the Platta-
burg Democrat-Lever, took his i>astor
out hunting one day. They baa but
one gun between them and the preach
er carried it. After they had oeen out
half an hour the man felt something
poking him in the side
around quickly he found the preacher
poking him with the muxsle of the gun
and fumbling over the hammers.
"Say, brother,” asked the minister,
“how do you let these things down?”
The man has sworn off taking preach
ers hunting. — Kansas City Star.
Marne —My steady blew me off ter
supper at a reg'lar restaurant last
Mag—Say, they tell me he’s real re
“Dat’s w’at. When he poured hie
coffee out in 'is saucer ter cool it he
didn't blow it like some guys would,
but jist fanned it wid ’is panama.”—
The (lame of Love.
“It always takes two to play the
game of love.” she »aid.
“Oh. I don't know,” he replied,
“The brisk business which is being
done in the divorce courts seems to in
dicate that it is common to have three
or four hands dealt around.”—Chicago
On the Verge of Lunacy.
Mr. Ardent—Do you believe that
love is blind?
Miss'Cyniqae—Yes, to a certain ex
Carrying One's Own Outfit.
tent. I am folly convinced that a man
Before the revolution in France it in love cannot see himself as others see
was customary when a gentleman had
been invited out to dinner to send his
servant in advance with his knife, fork
David Was on Time.
and spoon. If be bad no servant be
Mr. Joggine (tentatively)—If I
carried them with him in his pocket.
should not be home at dinner time you
Mothers will find Mrs. Winslow’s Soothing
Mrs. Joggins (with decision)—You’ll
arup the bent remedy to use for their children
b teething season.
be home at the usual time, David.
Joggine says he doesn’t know how it
is, but when his wife says a thing it is
It was not until 1470 that a title pretty sure to come true.
page was introduced to books and in
Types of Mind.
England not till before 1490, when W.
De Machline issued one to bis little
Thera is a feminine and masculine
book on the pestilence. Caxton never type of mind. The former depends
used them, but Wynkyn De Worde em chiefly on memory and is reproductive.
ployed them in nearly all his books.*
The latter relies on reasoning and is
creative. The mind of the man of sci
For forty year's Fiso’s Cure for Con ence is masculine. . Not every woman
sumption has' cured coughs and colds. At possesses a feminine mind, though
druggists. Price 25 cents.
many men have little else.
The Usual Thing.
“I would like to know,” asked the
parent, who had a eon in need of some
further education, “what is the coarse
at your college?”
“The usual half-mile coarse of cin
ders and all that sort of thing, you
know,” absentmindedly replied the
president of the great institution.—
Whara Appttit« la Co«rer«-4 Thar
Wkould, In a Mraanr*. B. W-ai>-<t--L
ST. HELENS HALL
• 1, I'tah, I» th*
Lorin Farr of Ogdep,
20 sons and I« daughters,
Ho ha a 296 grandchildren, «»J w
Ills living de-
aeendanta today number, approximate
Uf hit 39 children
.on» and 19 daughlere.
Mining, healthy and vigorous.
are pnwpenme farmers, merebante.
lHwy.ro and doctor.; the «‘r'e »>•*•
married Into every station, «mi all ha
large fa m 11 fee.
Ml of three children have been ed
ucated by Farr, and he ha. given thwii
a .tart In life Had all of them lived
to manhood ami womanhood he feel,
that there would have been none too
Fibroid Tumors Cured
SÆ The Guilty
Evidence of the Enemy.
It 1» related that at a recent ahnm
battle a young lieutenant, posted with
hl# company behind a wall, ordered
hla men to fire at a detachment of
troop# who were marching by.
The gun» were loaded with blank
cartridge«, and no harm w'aa done; but
the detachment happened to be on the I
lame »Ide of the »ham fight a» the I
company which had fired at it.
The commanding officer came rid
“Why did you fire on those men?”
he demanded of the lieutenant, hotly.
"I supposed they were the enemy,”
said the lieutenant.
"And what led you to suppose they
were the enemy?”
"Because my tailor was at the bead
of them and I saw tfty butcher In the
rank». What else could I suppose,
"Charley, dear,” snld young Mrs.
Torklns, "you know I never Warne
you for anything that is not you»
"But when the horse you bet on
loses, that Isn't your fault, Is it?”
"Charley, dear, the winner was just
as easy a horse to bet on as any other,
"No one forced you to bet on so:ei
“Then I can't see that you deserve
any sympathy whatever.
W. L. DOUGLAS
You can »are from $3 to $5 yea
wearing W. L. Douglas $3.50 or $3
They equal those
that have been coat
ing you from $4.00
mense sale of W. L.
Douglas shoes proves
their superiority over
all other makes.
Sold by retail shoe
Look for name and
price on bottom.
That Doug lav uo« ( or-
onaColt prove« there In
value in Ihiuxla» khoen.
Corona is the hiirheut
grade Pat.Mather made.
Fait-Color Ev'leti uied.
Our $4 Gilt Edge Line cannot be equalled a' any pnee.
Shoes by mail. 2-*> rents extra, liiuxtrated
Catalog free. W. L. DO It» LAS. Brockton, Ma»a#
_______ ' -
ceno# : 1
1 /NS/ST O// KZ/V G
RROM DEAL £A>
Mrs. Hayes’ First Letter Appcalinir to Mrs. Pliikliiun for Helpt
tinny. and he declare# that be felt
the lore of the few that died In child
“link Mas. I’iNKiiAu: — I have been under Ikmtoii (1< h tors’t»k
hood as keenly as would the father of ment for a long time without any relief. They tell m<- I have a fibZu
tumor. 1 cannot sit down without great txtln, and the scroll. .» ,• xt.-ndb
a small family.
Farr has two brother#—Enoch and up my spine. I have Is aring-down ( mi ìiln I « >t li back and front
These two men. 62 and (W domen is swollen, and I lui ve had Howing spells for throe yeani M
year# old. respectively, have tretweeu pelite is not gcxxl. I cannot walk or boon my feet for any length of ti»«
“The symptoms of Fibroid Tumor given in your little lM«.k £
them .">1 children, and 3UH descendant#,
all living. This makes the total num cunitely descril« my case, so I write to you for advice,"
ber of descendant* of these three K. F. llAYts, Jj'J Dudley SL, (Roxbury) lioaton, Slaaa.
brothers 710 souls.
Note the result of Mrs. Pinkliain's advice al
Although Farr Is now 81, he moves,
looks, acts and talks like a man 20 though she advised Mrs. Hayes, of Boston, to take
her medicine—which she knew would help her-
her letter contained a mass of additional instruc
tions as to treatment, all of which helped to brine
about the happy result.
Drowning.—Do not forget that per
sous who have been under water half
nn hour have recovered. Keep work j
Ing at them. Roll the l-wly on n bar- j
rel. breath Into the mouth, tiathe w ith '
ammonia or alcohol, work Ills arms
and legs. Keep at work for an hour
at least atxl you will probably nave hl«
I mini of th»» Ear. The drum la
the cur Is ns thin as paper, nnd thia In
stretched like n curtain tietween the
air outside and Hint within, and thus,
having nothing to sup|sirt It. and tielng
extremely delicate, n slap with the
hand on the side of the face, made
with the force which sudden and vio
lent anger gives It. hna In multitudes
of cases ruptured thia delicate mem
brane. resulting In the affliction of
deafness for Ufa. As the right hand Is
nlmost always used. It In the left ear
which Is stricken; thia elds In account
ing for the fact that the left ear Is
more frequently affected with deafness
than the right.
Many of the nllmentii for which phy-
slclaiis prescribe bismuth nnd a varie
ty of other “aids to digestion” would
be entirely relieved by exercise as
much as possible In the open air. Even
a frail person, one who has fairly
reached the age of decrepitude, should
l-e encouraged to use the wheel chair,
receive massage and be taken out of
the ts*<l everyday for a while. The
•lay should he varied ns much as pos
sible. and the body exercised so that
it will be possible for It to rest natur
ally during the long periods of rest
which the disease, whether acute or
Pleasant. Palatable. Potent. Tante Good. no chronic, necessitates. There are cer
Good. Never Sicken. Weaken, or ürit-e.
tain diseases which are called fatigue
... CURE CONSTIPATION. ,t.
Starling Ressedy Cmapaey. (tirage. Ir-ntreal. Re* Tert. 3tt
diseases—tremor, writer's cramp and
*nd <’iaranuw»<1 bf allòri«. local spasm. These are all caused by
■ U- IU*DAU gjBiatu Cl KE TuMoeo H müí L
the excessive use of special muscles,
and no one so afflicted should fall to
atop for a certain time each day as
long a time an can lie spared, and let
the part have the repose which It de
mands. This suggestion Is specially
meant for teachers nnd operators on
the typewriter, and clerks men and
women—who spend long days at the
desk working over figures.
A I ass.,
Lydia E Pinkham's Vegetable Compound
••1 have used your valuable CAS< A-
RETS and find them perfect. Couidn t do
without them. I have us» d them for some time
for indigestion and biliounnf-ss and am no« com
Bleteiy cured. Recommend them to •• • - < 1 •
nee tried, you will never be without then, id
E dw a M ahx , Albany, N. Y.
cured, after everything else
BLOOD POISON IS NO
RESPECTER OF PERSONS
Many ways t>f Infancy and childboxl
aewtn to adult, unnatural; and If cbil-
' ilren chance, as they frequently dto
“I hsve used your Hair Vigor
exhibit tendencies aulmal rather titan
for th e years and am greatly
pleaaed with it. It certainly re
eathtKlc, we are apt to roasider them
stores the originsl color to grsy
such as to be properly frowned upen
hair. It keep» nty hairsoft.“—Mrs.
Yet It might often contribute to one s
Helen Kilkenny,New Portlsnd.Me.
equanimity If It were borne tn tuind
■ that child Instinct, more frequently
Ayer’s Hair Vigor has
than reason, Is In the right.
For example, the lusty tit of crying
been restoring color
Incldeut to the baby's bath, although It
may prove annoying to the mother, I*
and it never fails to do
one of the beet possible tonics for the
Infant. The vigorous reaplratlous and
this work, either.
Increased activity of the muscular tis
You can rely upon it
sues conduce even more than the fric
for stopping your hair
tion of the bath towel to a healthful
glow of the skin. The Infant that Is
from falling, for keeping
obstreperous enough to resent »Ith
scalp clean, and for
loud crying its nurse's efforts to soothe
your hair grow
It, until It Is again In flannels. Is not
ll.tt a kwtl«. AU dratiltl«.
likely to take cold from Its bath.
Again, In the matter of eating, the
It your drugrtet cannot supply y
•cud u* one doiUr and we will exprete
child sometimes exhibits singular ten
you a bottle. Bo nure and give the name
dencies. From the time a child begins
of your ur.vrest eiprvM otti» «». Addreti,
J C AYF.it CO , lA»well. M am .
to come to the table until the period of
youth he often shows strong likes and
dislikes. Just how much tendencies <
An Apt Description.
may be combated Is perhaps of little
moment but In the quantity of food
“Why do they call the camel the
desired each child should be a law i 'ship of the desert?’ ”
unto himself. To bribe or coax a
“Never could understand it until I
child to eat more than he wants Is rode
on one oi ’em,” said the young
certainly not commendable.
who had just returned from
who, as children, are extremely "del!- abroad.
“Never was so seasick in all
cate” in their eating, develop In later | mv life.”—Washington Star.
life digestive organs of superior abil. •
ir VAII with to «11 vour arm tor ,-««h. w.-n.i
I UU »I.OO«n.i a full <1 -<Ti|.ti. u to th«
Overfeeding Is never so fraught with i
COAST LANDS AND LOANS,"
dangers as In childhood, and In those a ( monthly Journal published in the intereat
numerous cases in which the child lu- af
( Beal Estate and Mining largest an«l m> >t
paper of it»ela>xin the We>t. Ofllce:
stinct opposes the eating of as much Influential
1 HO FINE ST..
SAN FRANCISCO. CALIFORNIA
food as Is ordinarily regarded as uor-
ma) It should be respected. In
event of a small appetite being the
8UCCES8OR8 TO JOHN !'<><»! E
evidence of impaired vitality or dis
Foot of Morrison St., Portland. Oregon.
ease other concurrent symptoms selli Parsons Hawkeye. Automatic, self Fee lers,
Faultless Stump Puller, 1’*‘ horsepower with
be so evident as to lead to consulta two hersea. Buckeye Sawmill Machinery. En-
tion of a physician. Glowing cheeks ilnes and Boilers. Eiland eticaney Gaaollne
ngines. Write us wheu iu waul of anything
and sturdy limbs are admirable and in machinery line.
a delight to the fond parents, but to
many children they are simply not
natural, and no amount of food can
8CHOO1 FOR G1RU* ■
In many children nature exhibits a
H cation. Expert teaching in all <ie
conservative tendency, and the scraw
partinent«. outdoor exert i-e
trated book of information sent on ap
ny limbs and sallow cheeks may be an
Indication of conserved energy, by vir
ELEANOR TFB’ EITS, Pr n.lfwl.
tue of which l ime organ or organs
may not be overtaxed during the grow
The diseases of childhood often re
sult In temporarily damaged organs,
which time and a following of the t That’s what you need; some.
Instincts of observation which nature thing tO CUTe yOUT biliOUSneSS
meanwhile Improves may entirely ov-1
’y* and regulate
your - bowels.
Thus It Is that many
children regarded throughout child
hood as delicate and not llkily to sur gently laxative.
vive till adult life n t only reach man
hood and womanhood, but attain qual Want your moustache or beard
ities of extraordinary physical or men a beautiful brown or rich black? Use
It Is well to realize that very rare-
*y are there two children even In the JtFTT CT? OP DRp.GKT^i ar. r mu>co.. wo»* ,, * h
same family similar lu their physical
equipments, and that, therefore, no
"rule of thumb” method of rearii ng
them Is ever eminently successfuL
An inscription on a stone tablet
found in the ruins of an old synagogue
W anted to See Grandma.
in Kaifenfu shows that the Jews first
Master Ross Edwards, 4 years of
entered China daring the Han dynasty,
age, living In Irvington. N. J., was
from B. C. 200 to A. D. 226.
very fond of his grandmother, and
spent most of his time at her home.
A Pleasant Dream.
“I’ve been thinking of taking a says the Philadelphia Ledger. One aft
couple of months off this summer— it
' ernoon he came home from play so
very tired that he could eat no din
began the man at the deMt.
“A couple of months off?” repeated ner, and asked his mother to put him
the man near the door. “Why, I to bed. She took him upstairs, and
To Chicago, Dubuque and the didn’t know you ever got but a couple when he was ready for bed. said:
East; to Dee Moines, Kansas City and of weeks.”
“Now, my little boy must say bis
the Southeast, via Chicago Great West
“I don’t, but I can think about tak prayers."
ern railway. Electric lighted trains. ing two months, can’t I?”
“I tan't—I am so tired.”
Write to J. P.
And only the hard-working electric
"You want to go to heaven, don't
Elmer, G. P. A., Chicago, for informa fan was heard for the next five min you?
Then you must say your
“Are you doin' to heaven, mamma?”
Protecting the People.
A Discouraged Fighter.
“I hope to, and want to see my little
The public sentiment in favor of re
he boy there.”
He isn’t so much of a fighter
stricting automobiles to racetracks es used to be.”
"Is papa doin' to heaven?”
pecially laid ont for them is steadily
“No. You see be was always look-
“He hopes to.”
gaining in strength. Useful eelf-mot- ing for some one who could whip him
"Well, you and papa go to heaven,
ore are welcome in the highways, but —at least that’s what be said.”
and I'll go around and see grandma.”
not the racing demons.—New York
“Well, he found him.”
He T<M>k a Needed Ite.c.
“Yoakum of ’Frisco,” as he is known
An linklnd Suggestion.
in the railroad world. Is one of the
Compared with 1901 the population workers. They say he never tires. One
“You love my daughte<?”
of New Zealand (851,063, including day a friend called at the Broad street
"She’s all the world to me, air.”
“Then I don’t suppose yon’il want a 43,143 Maoris) shows an increase last office to see him. It was 4 In the
year of 20,263.
aett lernen t.”—Exchange.
afternoon. He found the president
leaning back in a big chair, reading a
newspaper and smoking. In surprise
he asked what was up.
"You see, I've worked pretty hard
for the past ten years,” said Mr. Yoak
um, “and I think I need a long rest.”
The next day the same friend
dropped In again.
hands in his hearty way, but »aid:
“Glad to see you, but I’m up to my
eyes In work. I haven’t much time.”
“I thought you were going to take
The world to-day is full of innocent sufferers from that most loathsome
disease, Contagious Blood Poison. People know in a general way that it is a long rest!” exclaimed his friend.
"That's all right. I took it yester
a bad disease, but if all its horrors could be brought before them they
” said the president.
would shun it as they do the Leprosy. Not only the person who contracts it
suffers, but the awful taint is transmitted to children, and the fearful sores
■n<4 eruptions, weak eyes, Catarrh, and other evidences of poisoned blood
show these little innocents are suffering the awful consequences of some
body’s sin. So highly contagious is this form of blood poison that one may
be contaminated by handling the clothing or other articles in use by a
person afflicted with this miserable disease. There is danger even in drink
ing from the same vessel or eating out of the same tableware, as many pure
and innocent men and women have found to their sorrow. The virus of
Contagious Blood Poison is so
powerful and penetrating that
within a short time after the
first little sore appears the whole
System is infected and every
drop of blood in the body is
tainted with the poison, and the
skin is soon covered with a red rash, ulcers break out in the mouth and
throat, swellings appear in the groins, the hair and eyebrows fall out,
and unless the ravages of the disease are checked at this stage, more
violent and dangerous symptoms appear in the form of deep and offensive
Bores, copper colored splotches, terrible pains in bones and muscles, and
general breaking down of the system.
S. S. S. is a specific for Contagious Blood Poison and the only remedy
antidotes this peculiar virus and makes a radical and complete cure of
the disease. Mercury and Potash hold it in check so long as the system is
under their influence, but when the medicine is left off the poison breaks out
again as bad or worse than ever. Besides, the use of these minerals bring
*. • and _a stomach
1- troubles of the worst kind,
Awavl frequently pi q _
duce bleeding and sponginess of the gums and decay of the teeth. S. S.
to hereditary taints
cures Blood Poison in all stages and even r reaches
and removes all traces of the poison and
saves the victim from the pitiable conse
quences of this monster scourge. As long
as a drop of the virus is left in the blood
it is liable to break out, and there is danger
of transmitting the disease to others.
S. S. S. is guaranteed purely vegetable and
tan be taken without any injurious effects to health, and an experience of
Dearly fifty years proves beyond doubt that it cures Contagious Blood Poison
completely and permanently. Write for our “ Home Treatment Book,”
crhfch describes fully the different stages and symptoms of the disease.
iw IWIFT SPECIFIC CO,, ATLANTA, «4s
NO RAI I Silt 101 10« ÏHIS
IIAH MAN WIIH 39 CHIlOfffN
“D sah Maa, 1’iM.iioi: Sometime am I wrote to y m d
ing my symptoms and a.-keti your a<lvi»e. You roplied, and I folliard
all your directions carefully, and to-day I am a well woman
” T he use of Lydia E. Pink liuto'« Vegetable < Oiiipoond enthsl»
expelled the tumor and strengthened nty whole system. I can wu
“Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound is worth fhntdol.
lars a drop.
I aiivi.M- nil women who an- afflicted with tmnoaiff
female trouble of any kind to give it a faithful trial." -(>igued)J(M
E. F. liAYita, 25'J Dudley St., (Roxbury) lloston, Mass.
Mountains of gold could not purchase such tc-timony orlala
the place of the health and happiness which Lydia I:. I'lnkUaai
Vegetable Compound brought to .Mrs. Ilayes.
Such testimony should be acei-ptcd by all women as conrincfar
eri-l enee that I.ydin E. Pinkham's Veffetable Compound »taudi
without a peer as a n-ntedy for all the distressing ills of women; d
ovarian troubles; tumors; Intlamnuilionn; ulceratimi, falling and db
placements of the womb; backache ; irregular, suptiresse-l or (Hitifil
menstruation. Surely the volume and diaructer of the testimonisi Irf.
ter» we are daily printing in the hews|«i)«-rs can leave no room for doubt
Mrs. Hayes at her alstvo address will gladly answer any kttrff
which sick women may write for fuller information al«>ut her illw*
Her gratitude to Mrs. i’inkhani and Lydia E. Pinkham's Vr-grubls
Compound is so genuine and heartfelt that she think*« no 11 > *ul>w it ton
great for her to take in return for her health and haj>pines-
Truly is it said that it is Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable t oss
pound that Is curing so many women,and no other me-li* me;don'tluh
get this when some druggist wants to sell you something else.
C*Cfinn FORFHT ff <-<*»r>n*4 forthwith
th«<rln»l l.lt.-t «0.1. .\UtfSS
AHU I II I «bovw t—.Um<Md«U, which will provw th«lr ah.olutw .«linl».iirw
ri„l.l.wi.. M*.U ■..«..., I ma. s«a
Hassd on Experience.
No Causa tor Alarm.
"Sag." queried the janitor, “did it
ever occur to you that lieggaie and ped
dlers are not superstitious?”
"It never did,” replied the elevator
“Weil they're not,” said the janitor.
“It takes more than a aign to keep
them out of a building.”
“Death loves a shining inark,"qo*
ed the young man with the high collar
anil noisy tie.
“Oh. well, don’t I* utisssy." *
joinetl the mat hie-hearted yoongtad.
"yoo’re not so brilliant."—Clscim®
“Sandy,” said Gritty Georgs, "b*
Is where some sarcastic writer aaysdss*
ain't much difference betwsss s
t'xmpe and de loafers «1st hang oat»
de country stores.”
“Oh, git oat!” sneered Handy Pi» i
“Who ever heard >>( us elttin on Ml
The Washington monument, the
highest in the world, towers 655 feet in
the air and is composed of 18,000
blocks of marble, each two feet thick.
Comes Natural to Him.
“Qpon is a good fellow, but hia con
versational abilities are remarkably
The Greek Pike,
limited. He has a few stock phrases,
and that's all.”
“Well, what else can you expect? lance la Gree e is the pike,
t-inals three-quarter, ol sn
He's a stockbroker.”
Soft Coal Mines Increase.
Ready tor Another Tara.
It is stated that on Jan. 1, 1903,
It is not surprising that a
there were 1,214 bituminous coal mines
in operation in Pennsylvania, as com been discovered in Hervia (or »’«
Ing” King Alexander. It >•
pared with 948 on Dec. 31, 1900.
that the tendency towards compw
and assassination i« eradica
Tommy—Pop, what is meant by the »piracy and a»res»iiistion._ln<l“B*r
sense of humor!
Father—The sense of humor, my ton,
A Nsw England Sandwich-
consists largely of knowing whon not to
"How many children haw f";
Ire funny.—Philadelphia Record.
asked the friend of his bovli”™
have three. The oldest a»'1
His Wants Defined.
Church -I see that florist wants some are girls, and the second child
one to write some advertising verses for My wife calls them the ««n,,w .
"HuhI” said the boyhood I
Old French Adage Affirmed.
Gotham—Home nursery rhymes, evi "That’s the first time 1 *’ver ,iT-
a sandwich with the tongue on U*
A young American lawyer once ap dently.—Yonkers Statesman.
peared In the High Court of England
To the Manner Born.
to argue n case in which he was also
London's itanv ar*v*’'Wf*,hU
the defendant. Addressing the court,
Crawford—Did he have much trouble
Of the 362 burial ‘'roan|f.,1 in
he referred to the old French ndnge ’n becoming a bridge policeman?
dodartaff that lie Who Hrgue» bi* own1 Crabshaw
” ' '
—Not after it was discov London has had only <®*l*.*.M.nl ,i|H
case has a fool for a client. After the ered that he used to Ire a floor walker More than 50 have vanished rom
case bud been heard he left for hla and kept the crowd moving in front of entirely; about a hum re<l b•
transformed from neg ected. «
home In a distant city, having asked a bargain counter.—Judge.
eyeroroa Into bright. eheerW I»"
11 friend to notify him by wire when
where London’, toilers mmli
Out at Flrat.
the decision was given. This was the
pithy despatch he received,’
“Generally speaking,” began the
and the rest, crowded w,,h. * ,nd
‘ Old French adage nffirmedl”
feminine end of the sketch, “I—
“Yea,” interrupted the villain in the closed alike to the undertake
Not Ashamed of the Funeral.
play, "that’s what you are.”—Chicago
The office boy had taken a day off New*.
to attend Ids father's funeral. V,',„,
he came back my friend asked condoi
Where Tobacco Is Free.
ingly about the obsequies.
Alderney is the only place in the
“You bet,” i
the |,Oy sadly, yp( Rritieh Islanda where tobacco la now
with a touch of pride, "we burled him nn taxed.
out o' sight.’’- Brooklyn Eagle.
The I’rop-r Clnssl,l<;at|(,n.
, De Style Is he a chip of the old
Giinbunta No. I ic ’ r q c | hw
liMii’i’. St. T s O h I m Liiinbcrniai),
The Southwick has the largest rapacity, I« faste«!
Heird for catalogue. Mailed free.
* -A “A#*. "