I
GOOD
J.«*'.' :
Out-of »Tone
Conditions
\Help
Jaaper-Why do y on consider Bond
r IbrWomM
A Markad Maa.
..i.
KMtha Aro
4rw Atwoyo Tlrodt.
f/nxfe
Who
...tu- t.tiiv lu.-kv?
The Psupla of Forte Rh*
Porto Rico is only a thirteenth the
aits of Cuba in area, but it baa more
••I do nol fe«l vsry wall, 1 am an
«red all tha tllno.,•
Marked by failure of appetite, loss of
vitality, that tlrod feeling, bilious
turns, dull headaches, indigestion and
Impoiitbl« to S*y*
other «toniAch troubles, aa well us by
Johnson—Do you mean to insiuu
pltuptai, blotches, l>oils and other ate that I can't tell the truth?
I'nrkinsm.—Bv no means.
It is
eruptions, are all referable to au im
do
impossible
to
say
what
»
nian
can
pure or Impoverished condition of the
until he trie«
blood.
You hear lheae words avarv day i W
often as you meet your friends Just as
often are the* word« rspMtal. More I ialands in its |Mri of thn world*
than likelr you »P»**» th*
•N"*«
•ant words youraelf, and no doubt you Theru >« u il'.ghcr grail« of Intelli'.
A.> feel far from well moa» of tha time gene« among tlias Porto Kicans tbau
Mra K»* Ul<*’
w‘*. among th« Uuluina.
whoae portrait we publlah, writes that
Pofumad Dsrviaha».
alie suffered (or two years with bear
Ing down pains, headache, backache,
The
Huilaiicee
natives eagrely bus
sud hat all kinds of tulaerabls faulinga,
olothee, cotton goods, sugar, |„.t.
luiiits. tea, nails, chains, wire, bath
er, false Jewelry sml iron trinket« of
Geneva. Great Britain furnishea ths
cotton goods, but Germany, Austria
•nil Italy have almost the m<m<>|M.|.
of the other articles.
Germany ths-,
a huge trade in perlilliii*«.
A ainKl«
caravan started off recently with to .
(MH) francs' worth ot German ac< nta
(or the natives.
It Is »aid that Henry Guy Carleton,
the playwright, who »(auituera very
badly at times, not ao long ago stopped
Nat Goodwill on the street and said to
Ulin. “Nat. will you g give me half au
li hour for f five mlnutaa' con vers-Ba
tion?"
In ths Emmy'» Country.
When Bishop Potter the other day
"I know well enough, fellow fill
tried to o|>en tbe door of a Fifth Ave
«eus," exelainicd the fieroa browwl.
nue stage lu New York, It was play Corrects all these conditions — it's shaggy haired orator, "that the
fully held cloned by the Rev. Dr. Ed the medicine that makes the blood that I advocate are not popular.
ward Judnon, the pastor of the Jud«ou pure and rich — the peculiar tonie lOdav. ago while adi.sating them
Memorial Baptist Church, who was lu that strengthens every weak function (nun a public plntform. I *«»
aide. "Ah. Judson." exclaimed the and build, up the whole system.
on tbe head by a buck ami knock««
Bishop, when be naw what Dr. Judson
.
“ We think then* Is no metllelne that can «ciisclesa. "
"Why didn’t you w«>* u,,hl
was doing. "I have discovered that you equal Hood a Sarsai>arllla. It has eured
got your sense Uek before vou went
are a cloee-coniiuunlou Baptist."
me ot (lieumatlsni ami relieved my hus-
Housekeeper« are sometimes importuned to
Booker Washington nays that during bend of catarrh. I hav« tried It for bolls to talking again’" inquired a man la
Sobriety Among Rellreed Men.
buy other powders because they are “ cheap.”
the outskirts ol the crowd, in aloud
the earlier days of freedom, almost and have found it tine. When ws have
The numbar of railroad turn <|lt.
Housekeepers should stop and think. It such
every negro who learued to read would that tired feeling we take Hood's and In a raucous voice.
charged (or eicreaivo use of liquor
receive "a call to preach" within a few short time the trouble Is gone.'* Mas. J. A.
powders are lower priced, are they not inferior?
A Cruthing Out tome
during th« pant 22 years has decreas
days
nfter
he
began
reading.
He
tells
Kxv
molds . Stockton, Cal.
Is it economy to spoil your digestion to save
"Joe, have you ever experienced
ed from 20 to one |s*r cent, and dur
of a colored mau In Alabama, who one
Accept No Subetltut«.
a few pennies ?
Ing the past 25 years the proportion
heartfelt iliimp|H'intnieii»?"
hot day In July, while he was at work
of men owning their homes has in-
"Yes; I once tried to dve tin» Ohl
In a cotton field, suddenly stopped, and
A Slim Menu.
creased tenfold.
red mustache brown and it turned
looking toward the skies, said:
“O
Alum is used in some baking pow
1 presume yoau are always till.Hl gt.-cn.”
Royal Baker and Pastry
ders and in most of the so-called
l.awd. de cotton am so grassy, de work
M.ndnrlni N«v«r S««n ts Walk
Cook” — containing over 800 most
phosphate powders, because it IS
am so hard, aud the sun am ao hot I with the divine afflatus,” said the ad
Pr«»«rvation til Eya.IjM-
practical and valuable cooking re
cheap, and makes a cheaper powder.
miring
friend
to
the
dreamy
poet,
Midi
Chinese mandarins pirns th,
b'lleve dla darkey aui called to preach!"
ceipts—free to every patron. Send
But aluni isa corrosive poison which,
"Yes," answered the dreamy poet;
An Ontario oculist thinks that the
whole
of
tlicir lives without taking ,
A gentlemau who was once being “yes, and that's alsmt all as a general eyesight of one fourth of the blind
taken in food, acts injuriously upon
postal card with t vur full address.
■Ingle yard of exercise. The 1st,
taken over au Insane asylum, naked an tiling."
the stomach, liver and kidneys.
Maa.
Rixa
llic*
patients he has had might have I hm ’ ii
Nanking viceroy (father of the Mar
attendant how they knew when an
savtd bv prompt precautions taken in al! of which «»» canard by falling and quis Tsene) was considered a remarka
idiot was considered to lie «uttlclently
1Í infancy.
Inrtaininaliou of th« woiub, and after ble character because lie always walk-
NOY AL BAKING POWDER CO.. 100 WILLIAM *T m NEW YONIC
restored to sanity to be discharged.
doctoring with phyaleiana aud iiiuner- nd 1.000 stc^w a day in his private
oua nie-Ucioea she waaentirely cured by
"Oh." said the attendant. "It Is easily
Unraatonabl» Raqustt.
t
Under no circumstances
Lydia K. Pinkham's Vegeta bio Com garden.
managed. We take them Into a yard
Judicial Gallantry.
Putting It Gently
Unceasingly tbe prayer ot man pound
whatever is a mandarin ever »een on
where there are several troughs. We
Judge—to female witness—How old
It you are troubles! with pains, fool in hie own jurisdiction
“Ladies, ” said the s|>eaker at tht turn on the tn|m ami then give tbe
went up:
______
Backward, turn backward, 1» Tune, in fainting »|>ellA depreaaloa ot auirlta,
are you?
annual meeting of the Boston bean
Not Any Beller Than Women.
Idiots buckets to liall out the water and
rwhictaiK'u to go anysslu-re, headache,
Il Would S««m Su-
Miss Paseeigh—I guess 1 am—
bund, “I shall, in elueiadating my
thy flight!
Many of them
A Boston club put up theatricals
Make me a l>oy again j««* for •*»- Ito-kache. and always tired, pleaaw* re-
“Pray do not be reckless with your subject, give you not hug but the-er- empty the troughs.
Hix
—
Has
your friend Wedsrly
meinlwr that there Is an absolute
guesses, madam. We can allow you the-that it to say, 1 shall give you-er- keepa (tailing away w hile tbe taps keep for "ladies only,” and some of the
night!
hobby ?
remetly
which
will
relieve
you
ot
your
running,
but
them
that
Isn't
Idiots
stope
lords
of
creation
almost
racked
them
Father Time whetted his scythe im auffering ax II <lld Mrs. Rica. Proof
but three chances at it.”
the-the decollete truth.’"
Dia—Well, I wouldn't cull it « hols
the tap."
selves into brain fever trying to git patiently.
la nioutinictit*l (hat Lydia K. Pink by. fl'a more like insanity.
The New York Sun's Pekin correspon in.
“And if I should.” muttered he, ham s Vegetable tompouud Is tbs
Conflict of Authority-.
•‘How’s that?”
•'they'd say I was making monkeys greatest medicine for auffering woanas.
“How quiet unde is this morning. " dent says that once during a dry season
“He's been married five lime«
Domestic
Opinions.
I
of them!"
“Yes, his co ns and bis rl eumatii In China, the viceroy. Earl LI Hung
Husband—I think only sensible
of Chang, called on the American minister.
Prlnllus Wllhoul l«k.
Tkia signttur« is on ever; box ot U» (anuinj don’t indicate tlie same kind
Mr. Conger, and spoke of the weather. women ought to marry.
A company has Iteeti formed to control
Laxative Bromo-Quinine T*bi«» weathes. ”*
"Yes,
”
said
Mr.
Conger,
"ft
seems
to
be
Wife—Well, you’d be a bachelor if the pro* rss of priming • lihonl Ink «ml in
tba remedy that «area a eold Im om daj
a slmrt time ii 1- npeciwf «•••* old
Mothers will find Mrs. Winslow's Booth dry everywhere. It Is dry In my coun that were the rule.
melh'sls will be re,olilllom/e.l
I here Is
in« Syrup the best remedy to use tor then try, too. I read In one of our papers
Probabilitie».
one I lung, hoWeier, that li.is rvo«te»l all in
children during the teething period.
the other day that In many places In
A Tramp'» Week.
novations: tli«i i>. Hostetller's Mmnarh
"Will nothing induce you tochauge
the West the people were praying for
Good Reason.
“Hello, Walker! What y'up to lUtier- It I. a »niidrrful medicinei"> dy
your niind and marry?” he asked.
spepsia.
indigestion, hllmusne»», Ineonim
rain." "What:" laid the earl, "do your now '-days? ”
Lady—Oh, how dirty your face
ia. coiiaiipalmii «ml wmsinim
II
"Another man might,"she replied.
I
people pray to their God for rain?"
•’Well, Uzy, I’m lookin’ ter a prevent» malaria, fever and «gne. I ry II
little boy.
yea. ”
“
Oh.
said
tbe
minister,
anil
you
will
nol
he
disappointed.
chance t' work—
Boy—Y'es'm; we hain't had no
For f 12 we sell one of the finest 4x5
" they
often
pray
for
rain. "
“Aw, come off! You don't expect
cameras made.
Equipped with all company for more’n a week.
His Explanation.
"And docs their God send It when they me to believe that?"
improvements. Send for full descrip
pray for It?" asked the earl.
"Yes.
”Wbat do you mean by having
“
Cert.
It
’
s
de
truth.
I
’
mlooikn
’
i
tion. At dealers, or Kirk, Geary A
sometimes their prayers are answered fer a chance t’ work some soft guy fer womans* letter in your pocket?"
Co.. 330 Sutter St., San Francisco,Cal.
and sometimes they are not." "All the the price of a drink. ”
wife inquired sternly.
————
same like Chinese Joss, hey?" said the
For a moment his face went white
An laupiritioa.
NOTEWORTHY ANNIVERSARY IN THE HIS Then a shade of relief chased it away.
earl, with a grin and a chuckle.
Mrs. Parkville—I have bought you
"On my won!, Maria, I forgot to mail
TORY OF THE YOUTH'S COMPANION.
The following la an extract from a
a splendid box of cigars for your birth
bona flde letter which a woman from
With its issue of April 18th The it for you."
day. Mortimer.
JUST ISSUED.
If 70« haven t a recular. healthy tnOTtateni ef
Mr. Parkville—Oh. ah—er—I have bowels every day. you re sick, or will be. Keep yom New Haven, Conn. wrote to Clyde Youth's Coni|Minion entered upon its
open, and be well. Force, in the shaped Fitch, the other day: "I have been
75th
year.
been thinking what luxury that I par bowels
violent physic or pill poison, is da it serous. Tbs
moot best easiest most perfect way or seeping tbs reading of tbe vast amount of money
To commemorate this anniversary,
ticularly enjoy. I should give up dur ecwals
clear and clean is to take
von hare been making this year by the publishers prepared a richly print
ing Lent, niv dear, and I—er—have
w. |.r
lami *n<|
«nal ^Mkpulaf Trarllort K ««!•'• bulli
writing plays. 1 do not approve of tbe ed souvenir illustrating the growth of
decided I had better give up cigars
CANDV
Sand you» nains and F O. addraaa and wa
R« t»«v» )•»•< > mmfìv «« ì • ♦••li I In« •>! A4vaaa>
theatre myself, but I would like to ask the nation and of The Youth's Coni- WHY IT IS SOMETIMES HARD FOR will mall on. or both, as 4s«lr«d. tr«e of all F Mg Inr* »11'1 *k«|h«f «l«*f • ul dllrf»' I Sl»irkatj4
. CATHARTIC
a.
ani III* la» (Mir ' F
•
-
•
The Bus* Prescription for Malaria
a small favor of you.
I am a lady I paninn since the year The Companion
eharg«.
HER TO BE PLEASANT.
•ame vr wrll« ue fot 4r« rlpui«« r«»« ■»«u« ««4
Chill, and Fever is a bottle of Grove’s Taateleaa
who
baa
seen
better
days,
but
with
was
founded.
1X27.
Perhajs
the
most
rlfrutan.
Chill Tonic. It 1» simply Iron and quinine in
God's help and your assistance I think significant features of the souvenir
t UateleM iora. No Cur«. No Pay. Price toe
ADVINO 1MKK«MFIt < o.
4 Cl«rli In a M lnnrap«>lla Ury Good« Ater«
the sun of prosperity may shine on me are its three maps.
The first shou
Nss 914 Frani N| , Forti»««!. Orega».
Tall« linw Ah* Necame A bl« lu l’»r-
Force of Habit
again. I am a widow with three the small section of the continent ca
or «all u|»oa Q«f »••rasi agent
form Iler Dull«« Kaally»
ruBTLAND, OB.
First and Taylor ata
Mrs. Shoppen—Give me a dorr n
daughters. Tbe eldest died two years cupied by the United States of 1827,
Fro« fAe Mi/owmaL
stamps, if you please.
ago and ever since I have I men most when The Companion liegan life with
Have you ever »top|«v| to think that
Poetoffice Clerk—Yes'm. Twocent?
Another
anxious to have her grave sodded practically no subscribers.
MILWAUKEE MOWER.
Mrs. Shoppen (absent mindedly)—
Won't you please soil her grave for shows the system of railways which t lie position of a saleswoman in a
CHAIM PRIVk
I.IUIIT ItgAFT
The
boM of r«>ai|MFtitir»a it to
Are they the best you’ve got?
me. my dear Mr. Fitch? My second cover the United States in 1901. an large dry g<ssl- store ia a particularly
X»sY FOOT 11 »I
taai hiur« * Ju«l aa goot a* McCotMlrk.**
trying
one'*
Working
lung
hours,
be
daughter could make a very good mar aggregate of 187,781 miles, The
Youth's Companion traversing every ing coni|H-|h-l to stand most of the Fifty ut < t r . ff hundr«*! «notarr« *«»i4 arvtin<1
riage If you would only send her
the «or .«I beer the name M« « «»«
mile
of this system once a week. The time, «ini being eijs'cted to lisik
with which to buy her trousseau. My
Far Reaching.
Hig Foar.
pleasant ri'gartll*-»» of suffering a Inch
third
map
shows
the
nnmls
’
r
of
sub-
Naw !»nr<
Watts—This Carrie Nation crusade third daughter has a beautiful voice. seri.a-rs to Tbe Youth's Companion -he may la- enduring, is it any wonder
I Hile Foter.
The Teacher'» Fault
The
doctor
says
It
cannot
be
properly
is going to have a wider and more
4 ertleal Lift.
that weak, nervous women find it im
“I'd like to know why it ia,” ex- lasting effect than most people think. trained for less than (150. It short in every state of the union in 1901, possible to follow this occu|iation?
week
the
pa)>cr
being
delivered
every
claimed the angry father to hie indo
Potts—I don't doubt that.
There dear Mr. Fitch, send me a check for
Everyone will I* interested in the ex
lent son, “that you always stand at will be Carrie Nation vaudeville joke« S5<J0, and Just see what an amount of to 545,342 American homes.
perience of Mis« Nellie M- Tomlinson
good
yon
will
be
doing
In
the
world
the foot of your class in school?”
for 10 years to come.
of 31IK Minnehaha avenue, Minne
Clearly Trur.
My daughter's grave will tie sodded,
"It'a ’cause the teacher won't let
apolis, Minn., who is a clerk in one
“What do you think ot this idea of the large dr, goods stores of that
Piso’a Cure cannot be too highly spoken my second girl will be made a loving
me sit down,” drawled the lazy youth.
of as a cough cure.—J. W. O'Bats«, 321 wife, and my baby will have a voice to that Mars is sending signals?” asked
city. She says:
Third Ave., N.. Minneapolis, Minn., Jan.
VICTOR STEEL RAKI:b
earu money for her mother with; and Mr. Beechwood.
"When I was eight years of age I
6. 1900.
“
There's
nothing
on
earth
in
it!
”
With
Wh*«l4. ma l«* !*»< Ibt
I shall have enough of your money left
had the scarlet fever ami it left me
•Wild an4 VAunllF
’*
Small Returns.
to hire a second hand piano. Be sure replied Mr. Homewood, emphatically. w ith weak kidneys ami a complication
J.
A.
IHIÎI
’
MAN,
(tonerai
Agent.
and
send
the
money
by
registered
let
Call on iba ag.sl or addrwa
of diseases I was nervous and finally
Subbubs—No, I won't bother with
YOU IXOW WHAT YOU ARK TAKING
VVU B. Water •».
FOUrl.AND. O’*
a garden this year. I had one last ter, as I think the ordinary mall la a« When vou take Grove’s Taatelesa Chill Tonic, became so bad that 1 left -chtstl and
A. H. BOYLAN, Portland, Oregon.
Couipl«,« «lori nt
unreliable.”
because the formula is plainly printed on every did not go for an entire term.
I had
year and it kept me thin as a rail.
bottle abowinr that it is simply Iron and Quh
WAl.Tgr. A. WOOP KITH*« -
For Catalogua end prie««.
beailacke
all
the
time
ami
was
t<s>
ir
Citiman—Worked too hard in it,eh?
nine in a tasteless iorm. No Cxwe, Nr Pay. 5oc
Paderewski Caught.
i¡table to talk with any- one.
The
Subbubs—No, I tried to live on
One evening last season, at a famoui
least ezciteinnt seemed to make my
what I raised.
Ruponubillty.
AA A rV A MX A IKT'T'
Th* P^Ffedtto« of Wall Plaster. Hsves
restaurant in New York, Paderewski
AUA/VlAlN 1
you tin.« .nd money. Isvesligate.
Dodger—I wouldn't be in the shoes heart flutter and a fainting »|>cll
happened to be dining there at the same
would
follow.
At
times
I
Itecame
so
of that New York clergyman who has
time
that
the
New
York
Goldsmiths*
dizzy that I would have to ait down LAND I’l.AHTKR.—Use oar Und Plaster and inrresse your crops.
Laxative Bromo-Quinine Tablet« cure a eold ia
IsstiuiO'
and Jewelers' Association were having married 3,012 couples in his life.
one day. No core. No Pay. Price 26 cento.
until the feeling pasaeil sway.
My niais, eirculsrs sml eipert information on application.
Codger
—
Why?
a celebration dinner In another psrt of
blrxsl M-cined to have turned to water
Office and Factory: Foot of I ourtoenth Strwt, Portland. Oregon.
Dodger—Just think what he'll have
An Instance.
the building. At tbe close of the feast
and I hail no color whatever in my
to
answer
for.
Agents wanted everywtiara.
“Thomas, ” said the teacher in the the pianist made bls way to tbe cloak
face. I was a mere skeleton and had
third class in physiology, “can you room and was busy washing bis hands
to lie down several times during the
give a familiar instance of the power when one of tbe other party came In on
day. Thai! one of the l»-st physicians
of the human system to adapt itself to tbe same mission. Tbe newcomer stared
The reader» of thiu p«|*r will bu pleased to in the city but he did not help me
Warn that there is al leaat one dreaded doeaae
changed conditiona. ”
“My parents read alsmt Dr. Wil
at tbe fair haired Pole, and at last, as diet ae>eiu-e baa lieen able to cure in all 11«
CAHH BUY ERB OF H1DF.8, I’KLTM AND TALLOW.
"Yes’m,” responded Tommy Tuck be dashed bls bands through the water, eiagea, and that laeatarrh. HaU'aCatarrh < ure liams' Pink Pills for Pale People in
the only poaitive cure known to tbe medieal
Cotiaigronetito eolicited. Fay liighnst market prie«. FROMI'l' KI.TURW
er. "My Ajint Abigail gained 100 said: "You’re very like Paderewski; ia
iraternity. < atarrh being aconatitutlonaldia- one of our city paja-rs ami thought it
pounds in flesh in less'n a year, an’ do you know him?" "I am Paderew enae. requires a conatTtuilonal treatment. would he wise for me to give them a
Itoalere in Inalbar and Flndlngs.
Hall's catarrh Cure la taken Internally, acting
her skin didn't crackle a particle. ”
Refar lo Walla, Fargo A Co. Bank, Portlaml, Oregon.
ski,” rejoined tbe maestro, modestly. directly upon the blood and mucona anrfaces trial. 1 liegan to get better when I
tbe ayatem, thereby destroying the fuunda
hud taken the first I kix nnd by the
"What!" whooped the American, and, of
tlon of the di.ea»e, and giving the t-alient
No Wonder.
daubing nt him, shook both his bands strength by building tip the eonatltnllon and time I had used two and a half boxes
“Great Caesar! It is stated here without waiting for the ceremony of a-aiatlng nature in doing its work. The pro I was cured. I can (terform with case
prletors have ao much faith In IIS t-uratlva
that (3,600,000 is paid annually in wiping bls own. Before there was any Cwere,
that they offer One Hundred Hollars my duties as clerk in a dry goods
any rase that it falls to cure. Mend for list store.
New York for the protection of vice!” time for Paderewski to escape the man
I was never so well as I am
Address
| "Calm yourself, man, and stop and from the goldsmiths’ dinner rushed to of teatlmoulala.
F.J. CHENIT A CO., Toledo, O. today ami it is all due to I)r. Wil
Kams’ Pink Pills for Pale People."
think of the amount there is to pro- tbe door, and, calling to the chiefs of Bold by druggists, 7Sc.
Hall's Family Fills are tbe beaL
Higned,
tect.”
hla party, yelled. “I say. Brown, Jones,
NELLIE M. TOMI.INSON.
Robinson, Smith, all of you, come here;
Accuitomad to Them.
Hard Bread-
Sul*-crilsvl anti sworn to |»< fore
I want to introduce you to my friend.
“Do you know, Willie, what a this 20th day of D<<< nil» r. 1900
Mr. Newlywed—Come, won’t you Paderewski."
horrible example is?” said the fond
K. M Thoni|mon,
break bread with us today?
mother.
8c»l
Notary Public.
Improved Proverbs.
Jack Jester—No, thanks, old man;
"Yes,” said the school boy, with a
At all druggists or direct from Dr
Quacks are stubborn things.
you see, I can't stand manual labor.
We have just issued an excellent little Cat
It’s a wise girl who knows her own i frown; "I never saw any other kind.” Williams Medicine Co., Seheneclmly
By the way, is it her first attempt?
N.
Y.
Price
50
cents
|te
r
box,
fj
mind.
alogue
on Fence subjects. Full illustrations,
CURE SICK HEADACHE
Kill (¡armi of Dlaeaae.
boxes, $2.50.
Society fa the mother of convention.
Not for Mis Health.
The modern way to eure disease la to destroy
all the newest Fence information.
A postal
Home was not built In a day.
its germa caacareta Candy cathartic are mod-
Hubbubs—Why are you moving
In Boston.
No Danger.
erti
germ
killers,
and
cleansers.
Ilrtigglare,
lot,
card will bring it to you.
Modesty Is the best policy.
toc.
.u?r“y."7Yw,; 1 "‘ll n,x
•v*ry-
Mrs. Featherweight (to cabby)— from your suburban home?
Circumstances alter facea.
Subbubs
—
I
’
m
all
run
down.
thing I do. Don’t you»
'
You're sure you won't run away with
A rolling gait gathers remorse.
A Lively Wake.
»J»
Hubbubs—Malaria?
W bite—I did for awhile, but 1 hail
me?
All
’
s
not
old
that
titters.
Subbubs
—
No;
gossippy
neighbors.
”
1
hear
there
was
doings
at
Me-
to
quit
My
wife
said
it
was
too
Cabby—No, madam.
I've been
Ix»t us eat, drink and lie married, for Ghoolighan’s wake.”
stupid for anything.
married these twinty years!
to morrow we dye.
What She Could Do.
“Doings?
There wor so many
Charity uncovers a multitude of sins. foine fights, me l>oy, thot th’ wake
TO crwv A COLD IK ON* DAY
Mrs. Fitz-Brown thought she had
743 Nicolai St., Portland, Or.
Take Laxative Bromo Quinine Tablets. All solved the great servant question when —Smart Set.
was reported in the sportin’ column."
Irugglsta refund the money If It falls to cure.
she employed a bright, young Norwe
K. WJGrove’e signature lion each box. Me.
Oround Plan Completel.
Only Four of th« Rank.
gian girl, in at tempting to acquaint
Naggus (literary editor)—How la your
Enfant Terrible.
the girl with her new duties, however, new eoclety novel getting on, Bonis?
The only persons who have held the
Mrs. Bilkins (sweetly)
Do have «he was surprised at her ignorance.
Borne (struggling author)—Splendid rank of general of the United States
another piece of CAke, Cousin John.
Finally, in di<air, she asked:
WARS THOTIlAPt MAW
ly. I’ve got the French phrases I am army were: George Washington, U.
Cousin John—Why, really, I’ve
“What can you do?”
going to use In the story all aelected. u. Grant, William T. Hhcrrnan ami
already had two; but it's so good I
The face of the new found treasure There's nothing to do now but to fill In Philip H. Sheridan.
\j JOHN POOl.H, Portland, Ortgo
believe I will have miother.
brightened, and she replied:
the English and divide It Into chapters.
Little Johnny (excitedly)—Ma s a
The Wor»t Yet
"I can milk reindeer.”
-Chicago Tribune.
Foot <tl Morrtr>n
(|
winner! She said she'd bet you'd
Stubb— I hear that Falcon is going
Can five you th* t*,t ^¡Tngine»'
Photographic Talk.
Those Absurd Dfctioaari«».
make a pig of yourself!
BuKtes. Flows.
‘n<\
Bummer Girl—Do you think you can to stop writing poetry.
Uncle Jethro—There ain’t no sens« take a good picture of me? •
Penn—Yes; the position in which
Fump.
I» best time to ours Catarrh, W “mill, ami
in dictionaries, nohow.
the
paper
brought
out
his
last
sonnet
llroiK-lillla -nd Coeitiinpllun. Machinery. «"• "•
b“r*
Cholly—I'm afraid I must anawer you
Our rrmrili la (piaralitarti, |l.
Edgar—How did you arrive at that
discouraged him.
I* <). Hoi STS.
In
the
negative.
conclusion, Uncle Jethro?
Stubbs—Did they run it on the
Wlae men are conaervatlve. Only "Children's page?”
| Uncle Jethro—They spell "hoes"
with an “r," and leave it out when foola give their candid oplnloua on all
Penn—Worse than that.
It ap
they coma to "horsepetal.”
occasions.
peered in the puzzle department.
Hood’s Sarsaparilla
ROYAL Baking Powder is indispen
«able to the preparation of the finest
cake, hot-breads, rolls and muffins.
Machinery, Implements,
Farm Supplies, Etc
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KEEP TOUR BLOOD CLEAI
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What Does It Cost?
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’
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