4
HKRALD AND NEWS. Klamath Falln, Ore.
Thursday. May 10. 13
PAGE -A
Friendly Irish Feud Flares
Over Impending JFK Visit
DUBLIN (UPH - A friendly
feud erupted between the Fitz
geralds and the Kennedys today
over the visit of their famous rel
alive to Ireland.
The Fitzgeralds come from
Skibbereen in County Cork and
say they are as closely related to
President Kennedy as the better
known Kennedys of New Ross in
County Wexford.
They are the clan of the Presi-
dent's mother and they plan a
welcome for the President aimed
to rival the cead mile faille (nun
dred thousand welcomes! he will
Set from tlie Kennedys of New
Ross.
The 'President is scheduled to
visit Cork June 28. When his heli
copter touches down, history will
have turned a full circle for the
Fitzgeralds.
The President will land in the
same green fields from which his
great-great-grandfather. John
Fitzgerald, was evicted 153 years
ago and his land given to English
planters.
When the great famine came
one of John's six sons. James,
sailed to Boston where he mar
ricd an Irish girl, Kathcrine Cado
can. One of their children, James
Fitzgerald, became famous as the
"Honey Fitz of Boston politics
and is the man for whom Presi
dent Kennedy has named the
presidential yacht.
"Honey Fitz" in his turn also
married an Irish girl, Barbara
Hannan. Their daughter is Rose.
the President's mother.
The information on the FitzDer-
aid family, gathered before the
Kennedys were so politically
prominent, was Dut together hi-
Corkborn retired U.S. naval Lt.
J. J. Cadogan of 1527 12th Ave..
San Francisco. He came across
the Fitzgeralds of Skibbereen
wnue researching his own family
tree.
He was startled, he said, bv the
strong family resemblance of tiic
insn fitzgeralds to the Boston
Kennedys. He discovered three
Fitzgerald brothers on a 60-acrc
farm at Abbey, near Skibbereen.
Earl Raps
CD Project
As 'Hoax'
PORTLAND (UPD-A Portland
city commissioner said today tliat
in event of a nuclear attack fall
out shelters would become "cre
matoriums." Stanley Earl, a longtime oppo
nent of civil defense, replied
sharply to criticism leveled Tues
day by Gov. Mark Hatlield at a
legislative cutback in state CO
funds.
Earl, in a talk at a City Council
meeting, called civil defense "a
hoax" and "a fraud."
"I think it's time the governor
told the people of Oregon the facts
about nuclear war," he said.
Portland councilmen have voted
to cut out civil defense funds and
the legislature cut the state's
agency from an 18 to a 3-member
staff.
Said Earl: "The City of Port
land has spoken. The I Portland'
people have spoken at two elec
tions. Castigating such people, as
the governor did . . . calling them
'peace-at-any-price' people, is not
good."
Hatfield, in charging I Ik? legis
lature with failure to uphold pub
lic responsibility, by cutting CD
funds, said. "The peace- at- any
price dan will rejoice at this de
cision. Those who support strong
military preparedness have failed
to come forth."
Earl told the crowded council
chamber civil defense "gives peo
ple a false sense of security."
He said that in World War U
bombing of Hamburg, more per
sons were killed inside shelters
than outside, dying of suffocation
and burning.
"I'm saying that in the event of
a nuclear attack these fallout
shelters will become crematori
ums. "Civil defense has a responsibil
ity, the government has a respon
sibility and the governor has a re
sponsibility to tell the people what
would happen to both sides in the
event of an attack." Earl said.
California has cities with!
populations exceeding 50.000; New
nrk has 19.
For Mors Fun an Your
VACATION
Don't Forget the Fannies
Tizzy's taking ne chances al
the applies sunburn lotion dur
inq her vacation. Don't you
take any chances on milling
out en the hilarioul antics of
your favorite comics charac
ters. Have the Herald and
News lent to your vacation
retreat. Or, have papers
saved in a Vacation Pack and
delivered to you on your re
turn home. Just call
TU 4-8111
where the great-great-grandsons
of Patrick Fitzgerald, brother of
James Fitzgerald, who emigrated
to Boston.
lt was not know n vet . if the
President would manage to get to
Skibbereen. some distance from
Cork. But it appears he is being
urged to do so by at least one per
sonal friend, Cork-born Msgr. J
O'Mahony, Catholic pastor of
Palm Beach. Fla.
Tlie Skibbereen Fitzgeralds say
that if the President can't come
to them, they will go to him in
Cork City.
Toothpick Cannot Be Patented As Own Invention
WASHINGTON lUPI'-A favor.
ite story at the U.S. Patent Of-
lice is about the man who walked
in. put a sliver of wood on tltc
desk and said he wanted a patent
on the toothpick.
He didn't get it because of a
special provision in tlie patent
laws. You cannot obtain a patent
on something that has been pub
licly described in a newspaper, a
magazine or a book, The tooth
pick has been described so many
times that a patent never has
been issued on it and never will
be.
But if vou can come up with
some variation on the toothpick,
vou can get a patent, and tliere
is one on the market now. It is
described as a "tooth space
cleanser and gum massager."
Vou dampen tlie piece of wood,
stick it between your teeth and
massage the gums.
Patent Office officials long ago
ceased to lie surprised at the
things people invent. It is not tlie
function of the office to pass on
the economic potential of an in
vention, but merely to determine
whether it is novel or new. A
farmer who obtained a patent on
a pair of spectacles for a near
sighted rooster got tlie same
courteous consideration as Alex
ander Graham Bell did when he
invented the telephone.
Many Strange Patents
But over the years some
strange things have been
patented:
A fly swatter pistol. When
you pull the trigger, a long
spring in the barrel uncoils and
hits the fly on the wall.
A grape fruit shield, lt is a
plastic shield which is placed
over the sliced half of a grape
fruit, but is enough smaller than
tlie grapefruit to allow a person
to use a spoon. When the juice
flies up, it hits tlie shield instead
of going into your eye.
A woman's hat that blows
soap hubbies. A tube runs from
the bat to a bulb which the lady
holds in her hand. She can win
friends and influence people at
any time merely by pressing the
bulb and a large soap bubble w ill
float out of her hat.
A labor saving device for
children in cold climates called
"a snowball machine." The child
packs a tube with snow, presses
a plunger, removes the cap of
the tube and a snowball pops out.
A spoon made out of pastry.
When a child is through using
the spoon, he eats it.
Inventor Poor Judge
An inventor frequently is a
poor judge of the potential of
what he has made. Joseph F.
(Hidden of De Kalb, III., appar
ently had no great hopes when
he received patent No. 157,124 in
1874 for something he described
as "an improvement in wire
fences." What lie had invented
was barbed wire and the ranch
ers on tlie Plains bought it as fast
as it could be produced.
Elias Howe, who was working
in a machine shop in Cambridge.
Mass., was a victim of public
indifference. He invented tlie sew
ing machine. People were so un
impressed that Hone did not
bother to patent it in the United
States, but sailed for England in
search of backers. A corset man
ufacturer bought the English pat
ent from him end hired him to
manufacture the machines.
Four years later Howe returned
to the United States and found
that people were pirating his in
vention all over the coiuitry. He
entered upon one of the longest
scries of litigation in his nation
and won every suit he filed.
Howe died a millionaire, but
his unhappy experience had done
something to him. To the very
day he died lie kept building
small, queer machines. Nobody,
including Howe, could figure out
how they could possibly be of
any use.
ACTRESS IMPROVES
NEW YORK (UPP-Actress Ar
iose Francis, injured Sunday in a
two-car collision in w hich one per
son was killed on Long Island,
was reported in very good condi
tion today at Columbia Presby:
tcrian Medical Center. '
WARDS
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STORE OPEN FRIDAY NIGHTS TILL 9 P.M.
PHONE TU 4-3188