PERIODIC PAIN
Every month Sue was
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A staunch Jerry Lewis fan, Patti has played "straight woman" to a million gags for the last 18 Valentine's Days.
tic jokes I felt the gentleness of this young man and his
deep need for affection.
In 1946, Jerry joined Dean Martin. Their almost Instant
success thrilled us all, and Jerry's insane comedy routines,
both on stage and off, had everybody collapsing with
laughter. When Jerry and Dean appeared in New York,
Jerry stopped traffic for blocks by playing a saxophone in
his underwear from a hotel balcony.
I was often embarrassed by such clowning, but I kept
hoping it was a problem Jerry would work out for himself.
These were the years when Jerry and Dean spent months
on the night-club circuit. Because of the children, I couldn't
travel with Jerry, who hated to be alone, and so the two
partners became like brothers. Jerry was the goofy kid
and Dean was the older boy who encouraged and laughed
at the antics.
Once, after reading about a raucous party in Chicago, I
, said to Jerry : "I know you want friends, and I ask only one
thing. Please don't do anything that will make people feel
sorry for me."
Jerry promised to try, but the need to be loved by
strangers remained terribly urgent He kept clowning, and
every time the columnists reported another of his wild
stunts, I felt like wincing. At one point, I became so de
pressed I told Jerry: "I've waited so long for you to start
behaving like an adult, and now I'm not sure I want to wait
any more."
When jerry realized I meant these words, it came as a
jolt but it was a turning point in our marriage.
From that day, he began to make a serious effort to under
stand what he was doing and why.
The wild antics finally came to an abrupt end when Jerry
and Dean broke up their partnership. Few people know how
hard this decision was. Jerry loved Dean, but they were
such different people that tension between them as per
formers was inevitable. The days that followed the breakup
were perhaps the most painful in Jerry's life. He seemed
completely lost. He even refused to go out to a restaurant
unless I accompanied him.
We decided to vacation in Las Vegas, and Jerry began
to feel better. Our last day there Sid Luf t called to say that
Judy Garland had laryngitis and couldn't do her night-club
show. He asked if Jerry would go on in her place.
I saw the Beared, little-boy look on Jerry's face; it had
been years since he had done a single. "What do you
think?" he whispered to me, his hand covering the phone.
"I think you're big enough to do it," I said.
Jerry took a deep breath and said, "Yes," into the phone.
That evening he swept the audience into wild applause with
one of the finest performances of his career.
I felt tremendous pride in Jerry that night. The pride
has been growing ever since. He has become more mature
and confident. When he is working on a movie or tv show,
he may sometimes clown as in the old days, but it's less
frantic. Everyone, from technicians to producers, knows
he is serious about his work and respects him for this.
I'M NOT SAYING Jerry no longer needs people around him.
He still hates to be alone, and at night he finds it hard to
fall asleep unless he has me or a close friend nearby. When
he had to go to Arizona recently to shoot sequences for his
new movie, "The Nutty Professor," I flew out with him at
his request
One trait of Jerry's that surprises most people is his
yearning for perfection in everything. This occasionally
creates problems for his sons.
There was one occasion several years ago when Gary, our
oldest was deliberately rude to me at the dinner table.
Some fathers might have shouted, but Jerry immediately
grabbed his belt for a whipping.
After the punishment Gary ran to his room in tears
while Jerry stood trembling. We have an intercom system
which allows us to talk and hear from every room in the
house. It was turned on when Gary said to me a few min
utes later: "You know. Mom, I think Dad must love me
very much. That's why he gets so angry and wants to hurt"
When I got back to Jerry, he was in tears. I don't think he
has ever forgotten those words.
There's a growing gentleness in my funny Valentine
these days. Perhaps he is learning that the people who
count in his life really do love him. The other night he
said : "Honey, I love you, but I also need you. Loving and
needing they go together."
When Jerry said this, I knew how deeply I loved and
needed him, too.
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