The Evening herald. (Klamath Falls, Or.) 1906-1942, September 25, 1922, Image 4

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The Office Cat
V JUNICH
Double TrmiMo
"How fnt rnn your rar go?"
"Just fnAt enough," replied Mr.
Chugglns, "to break the, road rules.
nnil tiol taut enough to keep ahead
of tho cop."
4, J. SlolRcr says tvhen n man Is
doing something ho knows ho ennnnt
nffonl (o ilo, ho can always Prove
that It Is somebody else's fault.
Kvcrjone Croaked
Tho professor of n medical college
was to giro R talk to somq students.
Ilo arrived rather late and began to
tnlk an ho entered tho classroom.
"I have dissected a frog and will
now explain tho functions of tho dif
ferent organs," ho said.
Thcroupon ho undone a package
and out enmo two Randwlches and a
plcco of cake.
'Who' that guy you were talk
In' so nlco to?"
"Aw, that's mo old family drug
gist." '
"What did ho say?"
"No."
T1im of a Kind
alio was tolling an acquaintance
nbout her girl friends.
"Yc", sho said, "my friend Maui
Is only twenty-five, but she's been
married throe times, and nil her hus
bands have boon named William."
"Yon don't say!" replied ho. "Why
sho must bo a regular Dill cbllectorl"
(llrls who want to follow tho lat
est stylo and havo their names em
broidered on their stockings must
either havo short names or long lees.
It's ono or tho other.
O. M. Hector says service without
n amllo Is like n prohibition beverage
It lacks "kick".
'Tho Thread That Hind
William Nutt of Mcndon, 111., and
Miss Blancho Bolt of Urn a. 111., wcro
married this morning. Fort Modi-
son, Iowa, Democrat.
Thcro Isn't much difference be
tween sight and vision, except when
you mako tho mistake of calling a
woman ono when you mean tho oth
er. Hey! Oct Busy!
He "A kiss speaks volumes."
Sho "Aro you collecting a lib
rary?" It's very evident that most auto
drivers think tho signs, "Stop, Look
and Listen!" aro placed at railroad
crossings for tho engineers to read!
declares James Foster,
fSokh, We'd Think So!
Sho due' her wrists into the-dcoit
sockets of her eyej. Dlurrcd by tho
gosturo, sho saw him only dimly.
Harper's Magazine.
Llttlo Willlo, rough as lioll,
Threw his sister' down a well,
And his mother, drawing wnler.
Said, "It's awful hard to ralso a
' daughter."
Tho philosophers aro right who say
that wealth ulono doos not bring
happiness, but did you over know
poverty to bring It?
Got rosults by using; class ada.
YOUR WINTER'S
WOOD
should havo your attention.
Cool weather and storms
force prices up.
Our fuel is the best, our
S rices are right on Slab,
locks, Body and Tama-:
oack.
Your business is solicited.
0. Peyton & Co.
U AUf, i MWWi m
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TW
SIPORTS
ajjljxvvxrtAAArirnrrnrr"ri"r,t"""""
Georges Finds
r.,.. rirnentier hcavnvctsht champion of Europe, finds that
when WftSSt" !SUSS CEtte2 shown hero btndln, up
one of the blisters.
WORLD'S SERIES
no sir
Fans Begin Speculations;
Connie Mack Found
Best Manager
NEW YORK, Sept. 2.'.. Baseball's
annual classic f.io world series. Is
just in tho offing.
Tho fan begins his speculations.
For tho sake of argument ho turns
back to series of other years.
What manager has had greatest
success In world scries?
And the answer comes Connie
Mock, christened Cornelius MacOll
llcuddy of the Philadelphia athle
tics. Mack has carried three of tho
Philadelphia teams to world cham
pionships. Twlco he met and defeat
ed John McGraw and his Giants. In
the other serlc3 Nack triumphed
over Frank Chance, tho ereat .Cub
leader. McGraw triumphed ovor
Mack In 1905.
Chance won two world series with
tho Cubs; Carrlgan won two with
tho Boston Red Sox and McGraw
has taken two with tho Giants.
The following table shows tho win
ning and losing managers slnco 1905:
WJN.VKK
1905 McGraw-Now York Nationals
190C Jones, Chicago Americans
1907 (Chance, Chicago Nationals
1908 Do do
1909 Clarke. Pittsburgh Nationals ;
1910 Mack, Phlla Americans
1911 Do Do ,
1912 Stahl, Boston Americans
1913 Mack, Phlla Americans i
1914 Stalllngs, Boston Nationals .
1915 Carrlgan, Boston Americans
laiu tarriKun, iiumuu jimi-riiuiia
1917 Rowland, Chicago Americans
1918 Barrow, Boston Americans
1919 lloran, Cincinnati Nationals
19S0 Speaker, Clovcland Americans
1921 McGraw. New York Nationals.
losi:u
Mack, Phlla Americans
Chance, Chicago Nationals
Jennings, Detroit Americans
Do Do
Do Do
Chance, Chicago Nationals
McGraw, New York Nationals
Do Do
Do Do
Mack, Phlla Americans
Moran, Phlla Nationals,
Robinson, Brooklyn Nationals
McGraw, Now York Nationals
Mitchell, Chicago Nationals
(Jleasoiv, Chicago Americans
Robinson, Brooklyn Nationals
Hugglna. Now York Americans.
DOINGS OF THE DUFFS
Si-
p? ., THAT GIRL CERTAIHLV I -J--1 Y 5HP MfWFi
Z ( CAM PLAY THAT ASIr-i ' 5AJ22Sl
B V BAMJO-YJONDE.RWHO j', M 173 CIGARETTES!
ll r, O ! 'F . WH
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Tennis Rough .
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If every motion picture wcro as
clean and as untertalnlng as "His
Nibs," In which Charles (Chic) Salo
Is starred by llxeeptlnnal Pictures
corporation thcro would bo no cry
for censorship.
This picture, which has Its final
shnning at the Libert)1 thcatro to
night, is a dellghful satire on tho
old-fashioned movie, a take-off of
all the oxtravngent melodramas of
eight or ten yearn ago. Also It pic
tures n rural theatre. The Slippery
Kim PIrturo palace, and tho people
who attend tho show. In nddltlpn
to Its great comedy appeal, tho pic
ture has tho added novelty of show
ing Chic Salo In seven distinct char
accr roles, each of them a triumph In
characterization, for Salo docs not
rldlculo or burlesquo his rural Im
personations, but Instead gives life
like pictures of tho types seen In tho
small middle western communities.
TIIK STRAND
Tonight at the Strand will show
"The Gray Dawn" for tho last time.
Thoso who saw this picture yester
day nre enthusiastic about It and
urgo their friends to attend to
night. Tomorrow tho picture will be
"The Three Musketeers" and the
price will bo ten cents to every
body. A crowded houso always
goes with tho ten cent price and
there will bo three shows tomorrow
night.
Next Sunday "Tho Four Sea
sons" will bo shown. This picture
depicts thp passing of the seasons
In all parts of the earth. It Is the
evolution of everything that Uvea
and breathes. Of wonderful ed
ucational valuo to the young nnd
of untiring Interest to the adult,
this plcturo will draw the school
children and teachers almost as a
whole.
Special arrangements aro being
nm do to accommodate tho children
In largo numbers. Teachers can
make plans now to reserve sections
for their classes. Tho plcturo is
next Sunday and Monday.
I.OIKSH XOTICK
Regular meeting Aloha Chapter
No. 01, O. n. S. Tuesday. Sept. 2C
7:30 p. in. Visitors wokomo. By
order h'dlth Delzul I.W. M. 25-20
P. S. Great Duck Hunter
Discovers New Species
(Letter from Phil Spar a to his
friend 1M Jenkins, Oshkosh, Wis
consin. Published by permission.)
Dear Kd:
Well, IM, when 1 toll ou 1 havo
been duck hunting you will know
right ntviiya that I got n situuil of
ducks even whilst tho other dum
bells with mo did not oven get n
tain feather, And you would bo
dead right, Kd, what I mean. Not
only that, but I got n now kind of
duck whlrh has a beak like a chick
en, or something, nnd not fl.it like
tlip ordinary or backyard tnrlety uf
uuackors have.
When this hunch nk me to go
hunting 1 ays all right but I do not
gURntntro to get iuij thing, I being
modest mill not one of those birds
which Is always sounding off on his
own bugle, Jon Suodgras and the
other fellows klndii grinned ut that
like they kuowed 1 was n grate hunt
er but wan keeping It dark. How
soever, wo went down to a pluro rail
ed the govornmen's sump and start
ed hunting.
Snodgrais nnd tho oilier fellows
as now Phil the way jou do It Is to
ksnuck up on them and ma) bo you do
not have to use your gun nt all hut
can club them to death. S.ts I, ou
gouts run along and use your hranes
to find menus and wnjs to get your
own ducks nnd do not bother with
trying to hand me the durhnm. So
they start off and after a wlillu I
walked down to ono end of the sump,
nnd sit down In n dry spot near tho
water nnd light my pipe.
Well. Kd, 1 had not sit there 10
(ten nilmiti'i) when along comet a
siuni of duck and slt.i down on tho
wnter a roupl.i roda away. Says I,
ioll hear goes and 1 let them have
2 (two) barrels. Say, Kd, they was
ducks laying nil around the plnro
and when I wade out and gather up
the remains I hnd six. It was grow
ing dark now gn I go back to the car
nnd wait for tho others.
Well, along co mo Snodgrnss and
the others pretty soon and they did.
not havo not oven n tutn feather, as 1
said lief oar. So I flash my bag on
them nnd what do you suppose thoso
dumbells did. Thuy laffed. Kd, so
help me. that what they did. They
sat down and laffed and rolled on tho
ground nnd laffed and I get soar and
says I what Is the Joak nnd If you
tell me I will laff too. So ono says
ducks my eye thorns not ducks but
mud hens.
WclJ. Kd, hcrcs my turn to laugh
and I dono so. Mud hens, says I,
your all goofy as In tho 1st (first)
placo these birds were not In the mud
but in the water, and In tho 2nd
(second) place who ever hear of a
hen going near any water. Just tell
me. says I, who ever hear of such a
thing as a ben going In water unle3
It was a stew pot.
Of coarse these dumbells was two
Ignorant to seo It and I got klnda
soar and I says the next bird which
opens his faco about theso being
hens, mud or any other kind, gets
ono rammed down his gullet. Well,
that soabcred thorn up, what I mean,
and wo cranked up tho l.lzilo nnd
start back. Kvcry nnco In a while
one of them busts out like ho hail
been touched off but when I gle
It I in my Bcmpsey look ho got over It
and oauly stayed red In tho face.
And thats about all there Is to It,
Kd, except that tho missus sides with
those dumbells nnd says what do I
mean by bringing homo mud hens
and I says tho next person, man or
woman, which says hen to mo will
not bo able to talk about lions or
nothing elso for a long whllo to come.
If you know what kind of ducks
thoso Is I shot )ou might let mo
know, Kd. There n now species I
guess mid something these diimbolls
around hear do not know nothing
about.
Yrs. Rcspcet'fly
Phil Spaco
Prlzo Duck Hunter
Bandon Now hotel assured.
Portland Roberts Motor Co., to
erect 28,000 garage.
How are You Going
NEW TODAY
LOST
ItKWAimOt'tWtltill
Crenu-colored ouvolopo contain
ing kodak pictures lost In roiid be
tween Klnuuith Falls nnd Round
l.nko Saturday evening, Sept. 23. Tho
name llurvoy wiltten on envelope,
Ono dollar reward If returned to
Ntluson Photo shop, 133 Main street.
an
LOST A eolllo pup, on Plover creek.
Kinder please notify Herald office,
. iift-ar.
KOU SAM-J a 14 Ion lumber truck
or t mil n for good real estate.
Truck ban lumber haul Seo A. II.
Moore, Contra! Hotel. 25-2S
FOI'NH Notary Public seal, owner
may hate sumo by calling at Her
ald offlro and paying for ad. 25-2$
FOR SAM-: Thoroughbred Alrdulo
-pups, and hair blood and half Air-
dale pups, Seen at lleary ranch, west
side of hike. P ). llox,:t(J5. 25-2S
FOR RKNT House partly furnish,
ed. Inquire HI Mill). Ami. 2r-2i
WANTKD Cook for rniirh crew, sis
men. Address Box 2S0, Hornlil
office. 227
FOR RKNT Office rooms over Situ
arm. m's store. All oiitsldo rooms
with steam heat and light and water
furnished. I'hltcnto Smith, 727
Main St. 25-27
MONT.Y TO LOANWo have n lim
ited amount of money In loan on
desirable city homes. Chllroto &
Smith. 727 Main St. 25.27
FOR SALK 4 good milk cows, year
old chickens and pullets ready to
lay. Phono 5I5M, 222S Kberleln
Ate. 25-20
FOR SALK Four-room modern
houso, furnished, In good location,
lot 50 x 110 feet. Nice big barn run
bo used as garage, Price for quick j
snio j-iiuu, vriiiu iiown, namuro iimi
rent. Sue owner, 512 N. Mill St.
25-20
SACIUFICK- Lot Lnkovlow addition.
Lot U, Block CI, 1251) rash, Win.
Jncobs, owner, Hotel Tour.ilno, Oak
land. C.i I. 25
BARGAIN KAI.U On 10 utmost new
family cook hIow. Call at Hot
Springs Hotel. City. 25.30
Wo haw two Rogue River vulley
stock or dairy farms to trade for
Klamath farm. What have you
Wrlto description etc., to Four-Slto
Sales Agency, Medford Bldg., Med
ford. Ore. 25-27
FOR SALK 15 head of purebred
Shropshire rams from 17 60 to
) 15.00 each F. O. II. Medford, Ore,
Also 25 ewes of siinui breed. Address
K. M. Wlnctrout, Grants Puss, Ore.
25-3
FOR SALK Puru blood Poland-
Chlnn pigs and good grade pigs.
Wocus hog ranrh, 2 14 miles west side
of upper lake. 25.30
I THIBET WILL NOT
BE MYSTERY LAND
VERY MUCH LONGER
LONDON, Sept. 25. Thibet, It Is
hoped, will not much longer bo the
land of mystery. Nor will tho great
outside world, It Is expected, contin
ue to bo the great land of tho un
known to the -Thibetans. They aro
to be offered an opportunity of see
ing, on the movies, something of the
wonders to bo found In tho vast
world beyond Thibet, In exchange It
Is hoped they will allow cinemato
graph picture to bo taken of tho
wonders of Thibet for people of oth
er lands (o sec.
A cablo Just received in London
uunnunces (he arrival In Calcutta of
tho members of the British Buddhist
mission to Thibet. They havo bo
gun tho long and difficult Journey
on foot through the Himalayas,
On their way to Dnrjecllng the mis- l
slnn visited tho Boilhldriimn (or
"Tree of Intelligence") tho sacred fig
treo under which, according tn Budd
hist tradition, Buddha was sitting In
coiitomrlntlou when ho attained the
perfoct wisdom. A film Ih to bo tak
en of tho treo nnd of tho pilgrims
vlNltlng It, and It Is hoped to hhow
theso nlcturus tn tho Dalai I-nma In
Lhasa Itself, Films of wild animals J
,11,1 111, u.rlnnu nann.lj nt tl,n ii..alfl,. !
world qro also being carried In or
der to offer to tho highest Tibetan
nuthorltloa tho first clnonintogruph
exhibition over glvon in lliolr famous
city.
to Tell 'em?
' i V 'f
lErrl 1'a GO RIGHT III AUDI ( ST vS VB 1
! S UlAPPAWitTt;.IMK ) 0UCMTToCUT00TTHa, r-
U 'P ABOOT HER SHOKIMG PILLS - T I5N0TI Hq
' t ' ' H V CIGARETTES J vrj T? ytfT' V ' I
She's Pride Of U. & Navy
a m . r
'
W-v
I Allis nmma ncott tXItt, daughter of Rear Admiral and Mrs. Kdwnrd
Rhodes will head tho lUt of navy dobutnntcu at Washington this season.
I'OR.MKR KMPKROR WILLIAM
KMKIKilNC I'llOM 111 SKCI.ISIO.V
IIOORN. Holland, Sept 25 Slurp
tho dismissal of the Prusulmi Count
Von (louthnril, former Cmperor Wll
llnin'ii rourt marshal, from (he royal
household here, William ha beieun
to lead a iiturh freer existenci', ami
ho no longer hpim-iim to fear tho gnzo
of tho public Count Von (lonihnrd
was a strong adiornto of tho sirlrt
est M'cliinliiii. but now that ho Is no
ESSAY
$35.00 In
All school children of Klamath County are iiivlt-d p.ir-
tlclpatH In this IhMtay CnntMt.
i
Subject: "Why the .Mis-Named Compulsory Kdurulnn.il
Bill" should bo def-sited.
The follow lug an- tho rnltm of the contest
I. K-sii)s iiiii-I be lliiill,-,, to .111(1 word".
- Mii-I Imi milieu In Ink iimi mi otiisii of nmx-i' mil),
:t. .Mull nil lhvis in i:nj- Cmiti-.!, Bi I2T Rluiiiiilli Pnll,
(ltlri tt ill lii ili'll't-n-il iiliiieiii-il to I In- Itiimtl uf
.liiilgi.)
I, No ISmijs Ih-iiiIiik ii l mink tiller lliini Oil, Ulllli will
In- ni-ei-ptitl,
.1. INs.i)h will ! Jwlitril on Mihjist Hinder n ml rini.tiiii llun,
tpHlln-. prm liintlon, ginuiiiiiir mid iH-ntiir-s nf (In
tuit I, Mibiiiilleil,
Judges of contest will be:
I'. It. HOI7LI.', Ilcnilil IMItor
'HAS. P. STOMJ, Aiiiiim-y,
lti:V. II, T. .Mi:Yj:it, l.iillinmi .Mliil-ti-i-
For tllo scrond best i-iHiiy 1 10 Oil cash,
i 120.00 will In given.
For tho second essay $10,00 cash.
For tho third host essay $5.00 cash.
Tlioru Is no need to delay, got sturted on your essny now.
Thn above contest Is being conducted by the Catholic
Civic RlghlH Ahhocinllon of Ktamuth County.
I. II. CIU'MP, Kie'y. MimiiRer.
. v it . j) w ... i r 4 ' , w ..or
longer In office the former omporor
does not hesitate to work In hlii gkr
den In full view of pskhith i.
He iIIm and trlum fir-tro' within
a fow feet of the foot-pnlli which ell
ilirles the grounds, isttit with only u
wire (em helweeii him and the pub
lic. Ho talks liin-Muiitl)' of forestry
ami (be nre of ire Tin- former
war lord l hating the ti-uo woods
which surround (be imrlt thinned out,
mid lie l tit tn nt If taking mi nrlltn
part in the work Ilo tonka lieerful
and hi-alHiy
CONTEST
Cash Prizes
BY ALLMAN
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