Image provided by: Yamhill County Historical Society; McMinnville, OR
About The Yamhill County reporter. (McMinnville, Or.) 1886-1904 | View Entire Issue (Aug. 16, 1901)
You may call it eczema, tetter or milk
His One Commission.
‘‘Does your artist friend have many
A hunted thing, through copse and WOOd
Night after night he skulked and
I “I believe he had one last year.
His father-in-law asked him to paint To where,
amid dark homesteads. stood
One gloomy garden locked and walled.
But no matter what you call it, this skin
disease which comes In patches that burn
Itch, discharge a watery matter, dry and
scale, owes its existence to the presence ot
humors in the system.
He paused in fear each step he took,
It will continue to exist, annoy, and per
a poet, didn’t she?
And waited till the moon was gone;
haps agonize, as long as these humors
And is he successful?”
Then stole in
I by the little brook
“Oh, yes, remarkably so. Why,
It is always radically and permanently
That still I laughed down the terraced
his name is a household word on two
which expels all humors, and Is positively
unequalled for all cutaneous e-lotions.
A Satisfactory Score.
‘‘You never seem to give even a
thought of your ancestors.”
‘‘Oh, yes, 1 do; 1 often rejoice that,
within public recollection, none of
them ever got hanged.”
“Isn’t your new house taking long
er to build than you expected?”
"Oh, no, I’ve only spent twice as
much on it, so far, as I anticipated ”
Beware of Ointments for Catarrh That
continents, and last year his income
was nearly $300.
And up the well-known path he crept.
And through the taugled briars tore;
And he. while they who sought him slept.
Still More Counterfeiting.
Saw his ancestral home on.e more.
The Secret Service has unearthed another
band <>f counterfeiters ami secured a large
i quantity of bogus bills, which ar** so clever There song and lights were still astir.
ly executed that the average pei*t>u would
And by her he eouid see one stand,
never suspect them ot being spurious. (And he had fared so far to her!)
Things of great value are always selected
Who spoke with her and took her hand.
for imitation, notably Hostetter’ Stomach
Bitters, which has ninny imitators but no
equals for di«oders like indigestion, dys Then back by copse and wood he crept
pepsia. constipation nervousness and gen
While yet the dawn was cold and diru;
eral debilitv. Always go to reliable drug And while in her white room she slept.
gists who have the reputation of giving
’Twas his old hound crawled back with
what you ask for.
“Papa, what is a snydicate?”
“My son, it is a body of human
beings entirely surrounded by money. ’
THE END OF IT ALL.
As mercury will surely destroy the sense of
smell and completely derange the whole sys
tem whenentering It through the mucous sur
faces. Such articles should never be used ex
cept on prescriptions from reputable physi Thia signature is on every box of the genuine
cians, as the dajnage they will do is ten fold to
Laxative Bromo Quinine T»biet.
the good you can possibly derive from them
Hall’s Catarrh Cure, manufactured by F J the remedy that earea a cold In one day
Cheney A Co., Toledo, O., contains no mercury
and is taken internally, acting <1 ireetly upon
Necessities Come First in Texas.
the blood and mucous surfaces of the system
In buying H b II’ b Catarrh Cure be sure you get
account of a scarcity of bricks
the genuine. It is taken internally, and made
in Toledo, Ohio, by F. J. Cheney A Co. Testi, in a Texas town the congregation of
the local church allowed their new
Bold by Druggists, price 75c. per bottle.
Hall’s Family Pills are the beet.
edifice to remain unfinished while a
Keeping Up Appearances.
Excited man (to reporter)—Now,
in writing up the story of the burg
lary of my house, you must say that
they overlooked $4,000 in the cup
Reporter (incredulously) —Really?
Excited Man—Yes. You see, ' I
don’t want the public to know that
they could go through my house and
only find $32 worth of silver and stuff
saloon was being erected.
I do not believe Piso’s Cure for Con
sumption has an equal for coughs and
colds,—J ohn F. B oyeb , Trinity Springs.
Ind., Feb. 15. 1900.
Ted—Was the game close?
Ned—Close? I should say so. The
crowd was just pouncing on the um
pire when the police reserves arrived.
YOUR HOME AND FENCES.
OLLY and I had been arguing
—as we usually had.
strange to say, neither of us had
enjoyed it. It was a regularly under
stood institution between us that we
would quarrel about once In so often.
It was such a lot of fun making up.
Dolly and 1 were not engaged, but
some time we were going to be. This
was another regularly understood in
stitution between us. This was a lot of
fun also, particularly as oift respective
families—the heads of them, rather-
had long ago decided that we had bet
ter keep apart for some time to come.
Because they had so decided and stern
ly forbidden any engagement until we
should both lie of age, at least, we had
gloried In the fact that we should lie
engaged some time. And to-night, for
the first time, we had enjoyed neither
EITQ Permanently Cured. No fits or nervousnec
ll I O after first day’s use of Dr Kline’s Great Nerve No Man Can Conveniently Go Without Either
Raatorer. Send for Fit EE 9'4-00 trial bottle and treat
ise. Da.R.li K lin «. Ltd..931 ArchSt.. Philadelphia.Pk
of These Necessities.
Sniffs—There is more sin in Chi
cago than in any othei city on the
face of the earth.
Snuffs—I beg to differ.
“I defy you to name another with
more sin in it.”
"He can’t be a good business man.
Why, he is a college professor.”
“But he has married the daughter
of a millionaire.”
Stopa thn Dough and
Worka Off tha Gold.
Laxative Bromo-Quinine Tablets cure a cold in
one day. No cure, No Pay. Price 25 cents.
You may as well talk about going
without eating as going without
If you have a house and
home you must have a fence around
If you have a farm you must
mark its boundaries by fences, and
also shut in the stock with fences.
A fence is in many ways as import
ant as a man’s house. As a commun
ity grows the subject of fences assumes
more and more prominence.
The success of the "Anchor” fence
in the United States has been phe
nomenal for the chief reason that it
combines economy, strength and
beauty in a way that instantly ap
peals to everybody. In the Eastern
states , where it has been known lon
ger, the factories making it are
pressed to full capacity.
state, where it is comparatively new,
its widespread adoption seems to be
only a question of the agents getting
around and showing their wares to
There is ample reason for all the
talk going on about the “anchor”
fence, as it is solving the great fence
problem satisfactorily. It is not only
well adapted to ornamental work,
but it is the biggest kind of a blessing
to stock raisers and ranchmen gener
ally. It is made of heavy wire and
the joints are held rivet-tight by the
patent “anchor” clamps.
not cost as much as the old-fashioned
fences, yet it lasts practically forever.
It is worth anyone’s while to write
to the manufacturers, The Portland
Anchor Fence Co., 742, Nicolai Street.
Portland, Oregon, for catalogue and
pictures explaining their wonderful
the quarrel nor the reconciliation, and
neither of us had made any reference
to that coming engagement.
Pref red Them at Rest.
I had been rather silent about it for
some time. I was so anxious to make
"You want the pockets to run up
the engagement a reality, and 1 hardly
and down, J suppose,” said the tailor.
knew how to set about it. Dolly, I
“No, sir,” the irritable customer
feared, had been silent recently for
replied. "I prefer stationary pock
quite other causes. The grim old aunt
ets. You may make the slits perpen
with whom she lived and who was her
guardian would harm my cause all she
could, 1 felt sure. Dolly reported that
A Man of Courage.
she) too, had been silent concerning the
She—I didn’t suppose you had the
coming engagement for some time. As
nerve to kiss me.
opposition is always food for Dolly’s
He—Oh, yes, I have got nerve
determination I was not as grateful for
enough to do anything.
this silence on the part of her aunt as
I might have been.
While I was wondering now how to
render the engagement an actual fact
For Infants and Children.
instead of an ephemeral promise, Dol
ly’s voice broke the silence snap
“This Is the last quarrel I will ever
have with you,” it announced, to my
The Literal Mind.
“I hope so. Dolly,” I answered, going
He—How do you feel when I beat over and sitting down on the sofa be
“Tommy, how many wars has the
you at whist?
United States been engagedi n?”
She—Not quite so bad as you feel *T detest cowardice,” said Dolly, still
when your friend Jenkins beats you at more acrimoniously.
“I loathe it,” I answered, still very
“One, two, three, four, five. ”
much In the dark.
•’We’ve done nothing but quarrel and
fight for years.” 1 fancied tears In her
voice, although her snapping eyes be-
| lied the fancy. “I'm tired of it, and
I I never mean to quarrel with you
“Dolly.” said I, pleadingly, "tell me
cury is a danger-
I’ve done to annoy you?”
even when administered in very small doses and
I was conscious. Immediately, of hav
few constitutions can stand it for any length of time.
ing taken the wrong tack.
Potash produces inflammation of the stomach
"Nothing:” You would have thought
and bowels, and a dangerous form of dyspepsia and
1 she was ready to eat me. from her tone
often chronic diarrhoea follow its use.
and manner. “I’ve been just as much
Now, the doctors will tell youi if you have
r r^aWoSd Poison you must take ^se minerals for two years or longer; to blame for all the quarreling as you
Contagious Blood P
vour teeth get so sensitive and sore that you I have But I'm tired and sick of it all.”
first, a course of Mercurv and when
ance, you are told to /top
She turned from me pettishly and
can t eat, and the gu
^ he’n the stomach rebels you are put on Mercury
and a change to rotash
. ..„»¡1 the svstem becomes so thoroughly saturated pulled the fringe off an entire side of
again, and to on ad
break outKon\he body, the prettiest sofa pillow beside her be
with these, poisonous drugs that the mc«t disgusting^
fore she spoke again.
the bones become disease ,
h drive the eruptions and blotches from the
“Everybody Is making fun of the
torturing pains. Merc try
blood and the reappearance of the old symptoms way we quarrel and fight,” was her
skin, but the virus remains
that the poison
active, and you can next remark, spoken In a low voice.
and the occasional sore mouth
inuuu, show ...............
r -*«—a is -f still
never hope to completely eradicate it
by this method
S. S. S. is the only "The girls make my life a burden, teas-
Whim I was about twenty-one years of age, or antidote for this de ' Ing me!”
structive virus, and an
"They make mine a burden asking
infallible remedy for when you are going to let me pro
this peculiar poison. It pose.”
destroys and eradicates
Dolly shrugged her shoulders dis
every particle of the
^^aeno. oft^ d^as. was Uft. I a~
poison, and makes the dainfully, but I knew I was on the
blood as healthy and right track. I dared not draw any
ye«a. K S. 8. does all you claim
pure as before the dis closer, but I did venture to lay my
iMKBSON, Pevely, Mo.
ease was contracted. hand on hers—a little timidly, but she
—i, nurelv vegetable blood purifier known, and we offer $1.000 liked the action none the less for that
3. 3. S.
whatever. The general health - and I pushed my advantage to the full
for proof that it
purges the svstem of impurities, and as new, nch blood
ri^e veins^the unsightly sores and other evidences of blood poison I and immediately.
begins to flowrm the veins we^ g
i “It’s rather unkind of you to keep me
In this position so long, Dolly.” I con-
■ tinned. “It’s hard on a fellow to be
known as hanging about a woman.
I with nothing settled, for so long.
Haven't I proved my devotion yet,
I Dolly r
I knew she’d like this sort of talk.
la beat time to cure Catarrh,
CüttS WM ML ELSE FAILS.
Bronchiti! and Consumption.
Women always do. And when they’re
Beet ( ough Syrup. Taetee Good- use o
In time. 8*.id by druggists.
I dying to be kind to you they don't mind
The Kind You Have Always Bought
». I. IMITI 110., Beffilo, »• 1 1
I accepting any reasonable opportunity
of yielding their forgiveness gracious-
; ly. Besides, it was stating the matter
nicely to say Dolly had kept me in this
undefined position. We had both tak
en and staid in it, for reasons ot mutual
fun and enjoyment, and, until recently,
J I hadn't suffered at all. The fellows
j had troubled me a little bit of late.
Dolly regarded me gravely, and her
snapping eyes softened. The hand over
: which mine rested trembled a little. 1
took my cue from that hand. Gather-
i lug courage, 1 folded my own long
I fingers around it. Then 1 said what 1
had been longing to say for so long.
"Dolly,” 1 whispered, "why need
either of us suffer from fun-making any
longer? You were of age last Monday"
—although I really hadn't remembered
the fact in this connection before—"1
was of age some time ago.
shouldn’t we leave off talking of the
time when we are going to be engaged
and be engaged Immediately. .We're
neither of us children, to be dictated to,
any longer. Let's be engaged right
"Right uow!” Dolly's eyes were'wide,
her tone wondering. "You don’t mean
“J do. Dolly," said 1. firmly. "This
| second, now, this moment,” and 1 em
phasized my asservations with a kiss.
"Y’ou’ll have to persuade me,” said
Dolly, all laughing, when she emerged
from my arms. And 1 was busily en
gaged in “persuading" her when the
door opened and her aunt walked into
Both Dolly and I are rather nervous,
temperamentally, and we can both
move quickly, upon occasion. Dolly’s
aunt, who is a most observant old lady,
noticed that we were as far apart as
the room allowed us to be as soon as
she had come In.
"Heyday! What's all this?” she cried,
interestedly. "The beginning of another
of your spasms of quart cling and fight
ing, 1 suppose.”
And then It was that Dolly gave evi
dence of having been successfully "per
"Oh, no. dear aunt,” she said, softly
with a lovely glance in my direction,
"it’s the end of them all.”—Elmira Tel
Built Up Brisk Trade in < ffsprina of
Mansion*« * fliclnl Cat.
Evidences of prosperity exhibited by
one of the colored employes of the
White House, best known as George,
have made him tlie envy of his asso
ciates. He recently appeared in a new
suit of "store clothes.”
When they saw him bring a little
kitten Into the White House the other
day. says a correspondent of the To
ledo Blade, and subsequently hand the
little pet over to a fashionably attired
lady who was riding in a trap ’lie se
cret came out.
Not long since the official White
House eat gave birtli to twelve kittens
an even dozen and no more. The old
cat and her fatuity were in George's
keeping. When the event became
known in official and social circles there
was a* great demand for kittens born
beneath the roof of the executive man
Learning that George was their keep
er, society girls sought him out ami
each wanted the prettiest one in the
let. Each wtts promised tin* "pretties1"
one. When a dozen customers had been
supplied the demand was as great as
As some of the kittens had brought
as high as $5 each, George could net
think of retiring from the cat business
He went among ills friends i t South
Washington and discovered other kit
tens. They were just as pretty as the
White House ones and passed readily
for the genuine article. When a cub
tomer was to be supplied George
would take one of the South A’ashlng
ton born kittens to the White House
and from there deliver It to the fair
one. It may never be known how many
kittens are lielng tenderly eared for
about the city and pointed to ax hav
ing been torn in tlie White House.
Nor will it ever be known Just how
much revenue tlie cat Industry forced
upon the colored employe yielded him.
FARM MACHINERY AND SUPPLIES.
Rewt and only
ter on the market.
Send for circular.
Mitchell, Lewis A
JOHN POOLE, Portland, Oregon,
Foot ot Morrison Slrost,
poKNlbl** to build. Beu matsrlal. Heat pro
portion. Best Mulsh. Lightest running. seven:/
w I • <’ »• k I.• .
SîAVEli C .. 1st and Taylor S:«.. Portland.0r.
Can give yon
the best bargains in
Boilers »nd Engines,
Pumps and General
us before buying.
Wholesale Boots and Shoes
KRAUSSE & PRINCE,
87 and 89 First Street, Portland, Oregon.
All Kinds Carried in Stock.
Lacking in Melody.
SCHOOLS AND COLLEGES.
Jones—Van Pounder's latest music
is bald stuff.
Jones—Because it needs an “air
Thirty-third year. Comm< dious build
ings. Modern equipment. Academic
and college preparatory courses. Spe
cial courses in music and art. Illus
Getting Back to Form.
“Is your ma well again, Eddie?”
“Well, yes'm, but she ain't quite
up to her old form yet. Pa fought
a draw wid her last night.”
Mothers will find Mrs. Winslow’s Sooth
ing Syrup the best remedy to use tor their
children during the teething period.
MiSS ELEANOR TEBBETTS, Principal.
After the Recc nciliation.
Dooley—Say, Hooley, gin me a
punch on th’ jaw opposite ph were
yez kicked me.
Dooley—I want yez to straighten
out me face.
For imardlng and day pa pi lx.
Op.as September IS. Fin.
new building. The prlneipnl
lie. liHit twenty-three years’
experience in Portland. Cor
respondence solicited. For
TO CUBE A COLD IN ONE DAY
P.O. drawer 17, Portland, Or.
J. W. HILL, »1. I».,
Take Laxative Bromo Quinine Tablets. All
lruggists refund the money if It fails to cure,
hi. W. drove's signature ison each box. 2f>c.
Hence the Term.
“De pusson dat goes froo life actin’
Clarence— Why do you say the hahd to please,” said Uncle Eben,
wedding was patriotic?
"runs de riesk o’ habin’ folks take
Algernon—Well, the bride was red, him at his word and quit tryin’.”
the groom was white and ner father,
who had all the bills to pay, was
Sorry He Lied.
De Garry—You are the only woman
YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE TAKING
When vou take Grove’s Tasteless Chill Tonic, I ever loved.
Madge—In that case I can't be your
because the formula is plainly printed on every
bottle showing that it la simply Iron and Qui summer girl.
I don’t want any am
nine In a tasteless form. No Cure. Ne Pay. 50c.
“It sounds funny to hear you talk
ing that way. When wc were at col
lege you didn’t believe in eternal
punishment at all.”
“I know, but I didn't have any
Th. B..t Prescription for Malaria
vhilla and Fever is a bottle of Grove’s Tutelea.
Jhlll Tonic. It Is simply iron and quinine in
tasteless form. No cure. No Pay. Price 500.
A Straight Tip.
Gentleman (caressing a pretty lit
tle girl)—You little licauty! You
shall be my wife when you are grown
At Menlo Park, San Mateo County, Cal., with up.
its beautiful, siirrountiinKS, perfect climate,
“No, I don’t want to get married,
careful Miuervision, thorough instruction,
complete laboratories, and gymnasium, easily but aunty there would like to.”
maintains its poRition in the front ranks of
schools tor boy® on the Pacific Coast.
Uoitt, Ph. D., Principal.
“Mandy,” said Farmer Corntossel,
“I guess it would lie just as well not
to say so much about home cookin’
when vou are talkin’ up your summer
"’Cause some of these fellers act,
to me, like that was what they was
tryin’ to get away from.”
Eure relief fiom liquor, opium end tobacco
habit#. Bend for particulars to
m . p. m . o.
writing ta advertlsera
mention this paper.
Wanton Killing of Hirds.
Extermination of birds is not alone
the work of fashionable vanity but of
fashionable gluttony. Tlie seizure In a
New York cold-storage warehouse of
great numtiers of dead birds during tlie
close season illustrates the easy eva
sion of the law by those careless of con
In hotels travelers often find upon the '
bills of fare the names of birds un
known to ornithologists and dictionary
makers. When asked what kind of
birds these represent the waiters are
permitted to answer only by smiles and
silence, or by confessions of Ignorance.
In the cold-storage house in New York
were found so many birds that the le I
gal fines would have run to millions of
dollars. What would they amount to
for the United States? As a result of
such practices everywhere those butch
ers and dealers who obey the law are
really punished for their honor, while
the reckless are rewarded by great
We are fond of pointing out excellent
spheres of work and usefulness for
those who are greatly troubled by a
few deaths of animals In scientific lab
oratories. Why should this stupid and
ruinous war of extermination of birds,
with Its great resultant suffering, not
arouse the energies of the Society for
Prevention of Cruelty to Animals?—
A homely woman shouldn't wear a
sun lionnet, tiecause she looks worse
and a pretty one shouldn’t hide her
good looks under one.
Tfie rooster makes two-thirds of th«
noise, but the ben does all the work.
taste (rood. Kat them like candy. They
remove any had taste in the mouth, leav
ing the breath iwM and perfumed. It is
a pleasure to take them, and they are
liked especially by children.
sweeten the stomach by cleansing the
mouth, throat and food channel. That
means, they stop undigested food from
souring In the stomach, prevent gas form
ing in the bowels, and kill disease germs
of ar.y kind that breed and feed in the en
are purely vegetable and contain no mer
curial or other mineral poison. They con
sist of the latest discoveries In medicine,
and form a combination of remedies un-
equaled to make the blood pure and rich
and make clean skin and beautiful com
tone the stomach and bowels and stir up
the lasy liver. They do not merely soften
the stools and cause their discharge, but
strengthen the bowels and put them Into
lively, healthy condition, making their ac
never grip nor gripe. They act quietly, pos
itively and never cause any kind of uncom
fortable feeling. Taken regularly they make
the liver act regularly and naturally as It
should. They keep the sewt rage of the body
properly moving and keep th» system clean.
Increase the flow of milk in nursing moth
ers. If the mother eats a tablet. It makes
her milk mildly purgative and has a mild
but certain effect on the baby. In this way
they are the only safe laxatlvs for tha
taken patiently, persistently, will cure any
form of constipation, no matter how old or
how often other remedies have failed. They
are absolutely guaranteed to cure any case,
or purchase money will be cheerfblly re
coat 10c. Kr, BOr a box. flampies sent frea
for the asking. We publish no testimonials
but sell Caecarets on their merit under ab
solute guarantee to cure. Buy and try a
box to-day, or write us for free samples
ASSfKM STBBLIWQ SIWIDY €•., CHICAGO •* SBW TORS.
nriA/ A DTI »Hll be paid to any reeder of this paper who will ra.
l\L W Alllz port to ua any attempt of zubatitution, or aala of
“aomethinr juat aa good” when Caacareta are called
for, aao furnish evidence upon which we can convict. AU correepondenco confidential.