JIM ANO JOE. Fays Jim: “There’s Joe; I wouldn’t be Like him, you know, Fer I kin see Mistakes he's made. I’ll let you know There'll be a change, It I was Joe!” Says Joe: “There’s Jim; 1 wouldn't make Mistakes like him. Fer mercy sake! They're plain enough To all but him. There’d be a change It I was Jim!" When ( Sod made this Old world He gave To Jim an* Joe A place to live; But no one Hence It’s come to pass Has furnished ’em A lookin’ glass. Mouifcnapolis Sun. W • His Uncle’s Fortune. * S 3 OU lire In a particularly cheerful mood, Bob, for a man who has got to the end of Ida resources.” “My dear boy, It you want to drive the last nail into the box that will bury you under a ton weight of cold shoulder pull u long face when you are In diffi­ culties, and turn seedy. Besides, a man Is never at the end of his re- “Well, J suppose a liver is of no use to you'/’’ “NonN In the least!” said Bob Sum­ mers, with a light l>ugli. "Give me a month to myself, Ted, ami good-by till then. Gue month from to-night—und this is the Sth- dine with me here.” They parted on the steps of the cafe. Summers watched Ids frieud out of sight, then took a cab to his chambers, paid his man a moidh's wages and gave 1dm a month’s holiday, packed a port­ manteau, locked up his rooms, gave the key to his housekeeper and, half an hour later, was smoking his last cigar in a tirst class compartment of a souta- westeru trulu with his lust $5 In bls pocket. In the next Issue of the Dormouth Times appeared this item of news: “Some men are lucky! Mr. Robert Summers, sou of the late Itichard Sum­ mers, of Dormouth, who lias been read­ ing for th«' bar since his father's sud­ den death, lias Just Inherited a fortune, estimated at from $499,000 to half a million, left by an uncle who settled early In life in Chile. News of the death of Ids wealthy relative and of the fortune bequeathed to him reached Mr. Summers, who happens to be stay­ ing at tile Dormouth Arms at the pres­ ent time, by the last South American malls. We heartily congratulate our fellow townsman." Mr. Bob Summers rend this with a placid facg In Ids sitting-room at the Dormouth Arms, while chipping an egg for Ills breakfast. “A very comfortable sum,” lie sold oquized. "Not too small for the covet­ ous mid not too large for the credulous. They will turn up presently." Before lie had finished breakfast a note was handed Idin from Ids old tail­ or, whose name and account he had al­ most forgotten. Il bogged the favor of n renewal of Mr. Summers' esteemed patronage. A couple of circulars strong­ ly emphasizing the claims of local char­ ities followed, and no less than six beg­ ging letters 111 an hour. “They must fancy that fortunes nre remitted by cable!" Summers com ineuted mi these prompt recognitions of Ids admission into the ranks of the dunned. To the other evidences of newspaper popularity was added the usual atten­ tion of a visit from Ids landlord, who hoped Mr. Summers was comfortable, lie had known Mr. Summers' father for "well on to forty years, sir, and remenilH'red bearin' tell of a brother who went to South America In the 'Aos. Very sad news, sir; but" brightening “he seems to have Improved Ills time, •Ir." "Yes." said Bob dryly; "an nffilctlon with compensations. Er will you send someone with my hat and get a mouru- Ing band put on? Uncle, you know.” Bob lounged up to the window Just as a carriage stopped In the road be­ low. "I.ady Wheedle," ho murmured, “by all that’s marvelous! lias she still got her daughters on her hands?" A note was handed out, and the car­ riage drove on. The note came to him, as lie had half anticipated, for liy this time he was becoming prepared for ex­ tremities. Lady Wheedle’» compll- fonts and condolences with Mr. Sum­ mers on his bereavement ("The old fellue!” he muttered. "What a quick scent she has!") and would bo greatly pleased If Mr. Kummers would dine at Wheedle bouse on Monday, the lltli, strictly on fnmllle. He had scarcely dropped the note on the table, with Its conspicuous coat-of- arms upiiermoat, when a Mr. Bolster was announced. "Bolster! Bolster! 1 don't re­ call---- ” "Owns a deal of pro|>erty herealmuts, sir." explained the waiter, with au apol­ ogetic cough. I "Oh, ah! Yes. Show him In.” Mr. Bolster sp|>eared a gviolemsn of a bustling and confident manner, with a km eye and an cx|»analve style of conversation. "Hope you will panion this Intrusion, Mr. Summer*. and particularly on mat­ ters of business; but capital, sir. knows neither births, marriages nor deaths.” •The deuce It doesn't!” thought Hum­ mers; but he said nothing to Interrupt the flow of words. the garrison untold suffering. Their “Capital Is forever changlug hands, clothes were in rags and fuel was of course, sir,” proceeded Mr. Bolster, worth Its weight in gold, so scarce had "but survives tlie ordinary mutabilities It become. Finally the food was all but of life. I called to say that I can offer gone and a sortie was decided upon. It you at the present moment some pecu­ Cities that Have Been Bravely Defended Against Assaults £ was carrle«! out with the utmost brav­ liarly profltable investment».” ery as had the resistance of the place, by Enemies. "But, my dear sir, you forget that I | but it was vain and a surrender was have not yet handled a penny of this made. Before the sortie the death rate inheritance, and am not likely to for In the city was 8 per cent, a mouth. some time.” ROM very ancient times sieges When the Russians Anally withdrew "That is so, of course, Mr. Summers. I When Gordon Fell. were ‘much in vogue, aud It is the allies captured 4,000 cannon, be­ A siege that touches the heart of No man understands the vexatious de- j astonishing to read the list of at- sides a great amount of Btores aud am­ every Anglo-Saxon is that uudergone lays In obtaining possession of t distant | tpyjpkj to reduce the famous cities of munition. by the brave Chinese Gordon in Khar­ inheritances better than I do. 1 But still, 9|j perhaps the tirst siege of which Sieae of Lucknow. sir, this Is Immaterial. The association anything is known was that of Bactra, The revolt of the Bengal army In 1857 toum. in 1884-85. Surrounded by vast of your name, ns a man of capital, with which was beleaguered by King Minus and the occupation by the rebels of the hordes of tlie Mahdi'» troops, hls’llttle mine would, at this Juncture, ennble us 9f Assyria, with au army of 400,000 imperial city of Delhi led to the siege of b md held out for 317 days with no to purchase some property for a very men, away back lu the year 2134 B. C. that place aud the eventual restoration relief. At last, wearied by tlie constant small cash payment, which I could not The city fell, it is recorded, through a of British supremacy. But the siege watching, the garrison was taken by acquire on my individual credit with­ itratagem devised by Semlramls, the was costly, and the city was won back surprise, according to Gen. Kitchener's out a present sum which I am unable . wife of one of the King's officers, aud only after the most desperate fighting idea of how It happened, aud Gen. Gor­ to command. If you will call at my 1 the King promptly rewarded her by be­ on the part of the English and the most don was massacred. office on Monday I can satisfy you as heading the officer and marrying her. determined assaults. The siege of LAW AS INTERPRETED. to the advantageous uature of the Thebes. Ill Boetla, was besieged three Lucknow, from 1857 to 1858, was still transaction." times. Ill those days the ultimate vic­ another proof of British pluck and dog­ The fact that a person mortally ".( am obliged to you for your offer,' tory or defeat for whole armies was ged determination. Mutineers sur­ Mr. Bolster, and will look Into the mat- ' sometimes decided by single combat, a rounded the city in which the slender wounded cut his own throat aud has­ ter on Monday, but with the distinct j ?haniplon appearing from each army garrison was inclosed. The rebels tened his «leatli is held, in people vs. Lewis (Cal.), 45 L. It. A. 783, insuffi­ understanding, you know, that I have, for the purpose. threw up intrenchmeuts and planted cient to relieve tlie person who In­ nothing to offer you but my name.” By all odds the most celebrated siege guns around the post, some of them flicted the fatal wouud of his liability. "Quite sufficient, quite sufficient, 1 of antiquity was that of Troy, cel vitliin fifty yards, and they continued Notes aud mortgages owned by a per­ assure you, Mr. Summers!” protested j brated because It became the materi.. to pour a relentless storm of shot ami Mr. Bolster, rising to take ids leave. “I for the great Homer's Iliad. The siege shell into the place day ami night for son who is domiciled in another State, presume au equal share in the profits lasted ten years before the combined three weeks. Assaults were attempted, but kept within tlie State by an agent, will be satisfactory to you? Thank Greek armies, torn by jealousies and but they were bravely repelled aud tlie are held, in New Orleans vs. Stemple, you! well, good-by till Monday. Shall petty differences, reduced it and burn­ mines laid by the enemy were counter­ Advance Sheets U. S., p. 110, to be sub­ we say 10?” ed It to the ground. mined by tlie garrison. With a large ject to taxation by the laws of the Bob stood for a moment, Ills face j number of women and children and a State in which they are held. Assaults Upon Jerusalem. wearing a smile that was a trifle sar­ The city of Jerusalem was besieged scarcity of men and short supplies of Guaranty of tlie prompt payment of donic, when the waiter reappeared uo less than eleven times and was the provisions, the condition of tlie be­ a note Is held, in Holm vs. Jamieson with tlie announcement that ’Squire scene of countless horrors. In the year leaguered garrison was a desperate one, (Ill.), 45 L. It. A. 840, to be not annulled Merryweather presented his compli­ J03 B. C., Nebuchadnezzar besieged the and It was Just in time that Outturn by a judgment declaring the note void ments. and could Mr. Summers receive city and it was valiantly defended for and Havelock came to its aid, with a for want of authority in tlie owner who him? The new visitor turned out to be eighteen months. The walls were beat­ force tliat was in turn besieged by the executed it, as against one who took a white-liaired gentleman of amiable en and shaken by the catapults and large numbers of rebels who surround­ the note in reliance on tlie guaranty. countenance and suave manners. A statute retroactively vacating at­ towers were built by the besiegers, ed the city. This was terminated by "You know me, Mr. Summers,” he from the tops of which great rocks the arrival of Sir Colin Campbell, who tachments is held, in King vs. Cros.^ proceeded to Introduce himself, “as the were hurled down upon the soldiers and succeeded in withdrawing tlie garrison Advance Sheets U. S„ p. 31, inapplica­ head of Merryweather’s bank, no Inhabitants of the city. Famine set In in safety. Then came the taking of ble to attachments levied lu other doubt? I called to express my sym­ ami the streets were Ailed with the the city from the rebels by the British, States at a time when by the opera­ pathy with your bereavement, and to dead. Finally a breach was made and who, in turn, became the successful be­ tion of the insolvent law the Insolvent ask you if we can be of any service to the city fell. The tenth siege of Jeru­ siegers. had not been deprived of dominion and you ?” control over his credits. Investment of Vicksburg. salem, which was carried on by the “Why, you are extremely kind, sir," Crusaders, was one of the fiercest and The siege of Vicksburg In our own Asessment of shares of stock in a na­ said Bob, In acknowledgment; "but you most bloody and at its termination civil war was of moment. Partially tional bank without any deduction for realize, doubtless, that I cannot open fully 70,01») Mussulmans were put to surrounded by marsh laud It waft a debts or for investments in nonassess­ account on a solicitor’s letter of advice. death within its Walls. The besiegers dimcult place to invest, and it was only able government bonds is held, In Mc- I should require something more tangi­ In those ancient times were usually after desperate struggles’ around the Haury vs. Downer (Cal.), 45 L. R. A. ble,” he said, with an ingratiating armed with cross-bowsand approached city that Its siege was completed. The 737, to be unlawful when State banks smile, the walls by means of great rolling garrison underwent privation and suf­ are not taxed on shares of stock, and “I fully appreciate your position, Mr. towers. Catapults and battering rams fering, for no supplies could be taken are allowed a deduction of debts. Summers. That will come in good time. were used, while the besieged had re­ In and shells were continuously falling Constitutional provision against laws You will probably settle down In your respecting the establishment of religion old home, and I believe I may say that is held, in Bradfield vs. Roberts, Ad­ Merryweather’s has a reputation for vance Sheets U. 8., p. 121, insufficient solidity and for consideration toward to condemn an appropriation by Con­ its customer» that cannot be exceeded gress of money to a hospital owned by elsewhere. But pending the realization a corporation composed of the mem­ of your prospects, it has occurred to us bers of a particular church or a monas­ that a little present accommodation tic order or slsterho«Ml therein, but sub­ might be acceptable.” ject to no visitation, supervision or "You are doubly kind” said Bob, control by any ecclesiastical authority with some difficulty restraining a de­ whatever. sire to clap tlie old gentleman on the A statute compelling a county to pay back—“doubly kind! 1 dare say, my three-fourths of the value of property friend. Lord Wheedle”—with a gesture destroyed by mob or riot, irrespective toward the open note on tlie table— of ability or exercise of diligence to “would oblige me for a few weeks, but protect the property, is upheld In Chi­ you realize tlie indelicacy one feels lu cago vs. Manhattan Cement Company imposing on personal friendship?” (Ill.), 45 L. It. A. 848, on the ground "Perfectly, Mr. Summers; the reluc­ that it is a police regulation for tlie tance is most natural. But as between better government of the State, and us the matter would have a purely bus­ does not violate constitutional provi­ iness character. Shall we say an over­ sions against statutes imposing taxes draft for $25,000 on your acceptance at upon municipal corporations for cor­ three months?” “You would place me under an obli­ course to throwing rocks, burning In the streets and among t’.ie buildings porate purposes. gation 1 could not forget, Mr. Merry­ pitch, boiling oil, Greek lire and other sent from tlie Union fleet and works. “Glencoe Modtler.” weather.” things down on the heads of the assail­ After forty-five days the city capitu­ One of the effects of the war In “Let it be so, then. Will you call at] ants. In one of the sieges of the Cru­ lated. The garrison consisted of 15,000 South Africa is to be found in the the bauk before 1 ? Thank you.” sades the inhabitants threw down hun- | meu and the inhabitants numbered registers of births in tlie several dis­ With Monday forenoon came the in duals of bee hives among the besiegers. 30,000. They were reduced to eating tricts of England, some very peculiar tervlew with Mr. Bolster, and be It Is unnecessary to state that the mules and dogs before the end of the names, arising out of the Transvaal emerged from It the half owner of a weapons were very effective. siege. campaign, having been bestowed by building estate, for which he had un­ Rome underwent a full baker’s dozen patriotic but inconsiderate parents on In the Franco-Prussian War. dertaken to pay $100,000 in one, two, of sieges. Athens has Buffered thrice During the war between Germany their children. In a populous town In three and four years. in this way, while Babylon twice fell and France in 1870 and 1871 there were Lancashire, for instance, there is a tint of at least a dozen schemes sub Into tlie hands of n besieging arffiy. three important sieges, those of Stras­ little boy rejoicing in the uncommon mltted to him, with tlie rosiest assur­ Alexandria lias undergone seven, Con­ burg. Metz anil Paris. Strasburg was name of “Mafeking,” given him in hon­ ances of profitable Investment, he se­ stantinople live. Belgrade eight, Anti­ Invested by 70,000 German troops, or of ills uncle, who formed one of tlie lected tliree. which lie negotiated dur­ och three. Tyre six, Naples eight aud while its garrison consisted of 10,000 garrison of that town under Colonel ing tlie week, lie bought a wharf, a Paris sewn. The longest siege on rec­ Frenchmen. Close lirvestment caused Baden-Powell, while in one or two in­ fleet of coasting vessels and a tin uilue ord was that of Azoth In Palestine, famine to make its appearance and the stances the name "Volunteer” has been in tlie vicinity. By depositing the deedt which for twenty-nlue years withstood city was surrendered after six weeks given to children as evidence of the with Merryweathers' bank as collateral the advances of Psammetlehus, King of siege. intense interest which has been taken security, lie obtained an overdraft large of Egypt. in the departure of the “clt.zen sol­ The city nnd territory Immediately enough to enable him to complete these ISarugosBu noil St, Hebn»tlnn. surrounding Metz were considered Im ­ diers ” to the front. purchases on very favorable terms, aud in the present century, one of the Tlie names of several of the leading then he instructed Ills solicitors tc most remarkable sieges was that of pregnable and it Is traversed by the river Moselle so that its supply of water engagements which have up to tlie amalgamate the tliree properties In a Saragossa in the Peninsular war, when is inexhaustible. But when the French present been fought figure prominent syndicate. 35,000 French surrounded and took the Altogether this was the hardest formidable city lu which were almbst withdrew to Metz they were followed in these registers, such as "Glencoe, a very popular name for a boy just mouth's work In Mr, Robert Futiitners' impregnable fortifications manned by and gradually hemmed In by scientific now;"Dundee,” "Eland” (the full name operations on the part of tlie Germans. life. He felt that he could not endure 50,000 Spaniards. The fighting wns After more than two months the “ Elandslaagte” having apparently the strain of It tnucli longer, aud, more­ fierce. Mines destroyed building after over, there wus some peril in prolong building In tlie city, the French gradu­ French were compelled to surrender proved too much of a mouthful), ami 180,000 men, including 0,000 officers, be­ “Belmont” the last a favorite name Ing it. ally winning their way Into the be­ sides 20.000 sick and wounded. The for girls, while one boy living near He gave the last of the four week» leaguered place. When It finally sur­ to realizing on his Investments, and' rendered 40,000 people had perished, Investing army was only slightly larger London will have cause In a few years’ time to bemoan the hard fate which the Incipient ttoom hi» enterprise had the number of deaths from disease at than the besieged. Ou the 19th of September, 1870, the saddled him with the name of “Glen­ started made that au easier task thac times reaching between 400 and 500 a Gernrtni troops had closed around Paris coe Molder.” With what must be he had anticipated. day. Sixteen thousand shells were j with its 1,825,000 Inhabitants and looked upon ns a daring anticipation of Tin was rapidly rising In the market thrown and 45,000 pound« of powder 490.000 troops. The outermost line of events, a girl in North London has for one thing, and he disposed of hit were exploded lu the mines. defences stretched in a great ellipse just been registered as “Roberts Pre- | Interest In the Dormouth tin and coast lu the siege of St Sebastian In 1813, twenty-six miles in circumference. But toria.” Speaking of Pretoria reminds j Ing syndicate for a profit of $15,000 where the French gallantly beat off the Bolster was very glad to give him a allies for n considerable time, there the Prussians erected works nnd dug one that several children already hear $5,000 profit for his linlf share lu th« ’ were 70,503 shells fired against the city trenches nnd no supplies could lie taken that name, though so far no one has building estate. He was able to pay and mole than 500,000 pounds of pow­ into the city. Food ran short. Sortie had the courage to name his offspring after sortie was made by great bodies “Bloemfontein;” “Kimberley,” how­ off his overdraft at Merryweatlier’i der. of the French, but they were met and ever, has been utilized several times. and retire with a clean $17,000. Rlege of Sebastopol. repulsed by the besiegers, and the final He gave no intimation, however, tha' Tlie siege of Sebastopol by the allied agreement to surrender tlie city was The Prisoner Was Mixed. the game was up. Ills popularity wai armies In the Crimean war was one of "Prisoner,” said the Maryland jus­ at no time so great, nor his name »<, the most tremendous events of Its kind made on the 28th of January, 1871. tice. as the case was closed. "You have persistently on everybody's tongue, ai' of the century. The Russlaus had for­ Flege of Plevna. lieep found guilty of stealing a pig be­ when he was packing his portmanteai tified themselves strongly In the city, The defense and siege of Plevna in to return to Ixmdon, on the evening oi where they had a force of 45,000 men the Russo-Turkish war of 1877-78 form longing to Col. Childers. Have you the fourth of the mouth following bb and an Immense quantity of guns, am­ one of the most thrilling chapters in anything to say before I pass sen­ tence?” arrival at Dormouth. munition and plenty of store*. The I modern military operation*. The Itus- "I has. sah,” answered the prisoner, He met Ted Craig at the very spot ot , sufferings of the French and English I slans. with their strong armies three as he rose up. "It wns all a mistake, which they had parted a month la-fore armies durtug that siege of 1854 and times attacked the Turkish armies ' ¡edge—all a mistake. I didn't dun reck- “What’s all this rumor." exelalmet 1855 were frightful. Inadequate provi­ the vicinity of Plevna, each time m< >n to steal no pig from Kurnel Chlivers. Craig, "of your having come lu for i sion bad lieen made for the campaign. I ing with a disastrous repulse. Finali,. -What I was arter was a hawg belongin' fort tine?” with overpowering number* the city Meu died by the score from disease. “Good heavens! llns It got here?” | The hardships endured from the sever­ was surrounded nnd all the roads were to Majah Dawson, an’ how dem two animals got mixed up and de constable "All over the shop. Bob." ity of th«- weather we# frightful. The blocked. With 120.000 Russians out­ found de meat In my cabin am gwine "Well. I have--a small oue." side, the 45,000 Turkish soldiers couM battles of Balaklava and Inkermauu "Some old uncle lu the West Indie« were Incidents of this siege, each of only ex;xvt to prolong their resistance to («odder me ’till I come out o’ jail an’ lick de ole woman fur not keepin’ better wasn't it?" them worthy of a place in the list of until It should be terminated by starva­ watch at de doah!”—Washington Post. "The place Isn't material, Ted.” the world's tierce struggles. A hurri­ tion. The investment was completed “U hat did he die of F’ Wag • in New Month Walea. cane was another of tlw*e Incidents. on Nov. 2 and early In December the “A newspaper paragraph.” In New South Wales the government And the storm of the elements was only food supply had run extremely low, “Queer thing! Are you going bag) a type of the hurricane of shot ami only a small allowance of meal a day has fixed the minimum wages of rail­ to ItormoulbT” shell which marked the continuance, being given each soldier. The weather way laborers at 7 shillings, or a ' jou I "Naverr aud especially the close, of the «leg«'. was severe. 8uow and frost cause! $1.75 a day. HISTORICAL SIEGES. ! JOHN HOWARD PARNELL. ’ Quarreled with His Sister About tha Queen's Visit to Ireland. The visit of Queen Victoria to Ire­ land provoked a controversy in the Parnell family. Anna Parnell, sister of the late Charles Stewart Parnell, was displeased and said the country should wear mourning for the event. Iler brother, John Howard Parnell, on the other hand, was enthusiastic over the royal visit and scores bis sister sharply. John Howard Parnell has none of the brilliant qualities of Ills brother, yet he has taken some part in Irish pol­ itics. In 1873 he and Charles Stewart Parnell came to this country, Intending to locate here. In Georgia they bought peach-growing lands ami settled dogrn to fruit farming. Returning to Ireland to prepare for removal to this country, they found the home rule party in bad condition and Its leader anxious that John should enter Parliament for tho purpose of galvanizing it into new life. He declined to permit his name to bo used, but suggested that his brother, Charles Stewart, might make the fight. In this way It came about that the younger I’arnell remained in Ireland and made history for his country while the elder returned to Georgia to be­ come the first successful shipper ot peaches from that State to the North­ ern markets. During the years tliat John Howard Parnell lived on his peach farm lie was noted for his eccen­ < tricities. He 'hardly spoke to bis neighbors, aud when he did it ’was in monosyllables. He had a large library, in which be spent much of his time when he was not hunting. He led this life year after year. When disaster came to his distinguish- < h 1 brother lie refused to discuss tho matter except to express confidence in his ability to triumph over all his foes. Upon tlie death of Charles Stew­ art, John returned to Ireland aud was el«*cted to Parliament. He attempted to make himself leader of the Irish party there, but lacked the qualities esesutial for leadership. TYPICAL VILLAGE CROSS. Its Like Abound» Everywhere In Many ' Part» of South America. A Here is a picture of a typical village cross at San Francisco, a small village near Pari, in tlie province, of Minas Geraes, Brazil. On the cross are rep-, TVrtCAL RRAZILIAN VIT.LAOB SHRINK. resented all the paraphernalia ol Cbrist'scruclflxlon, Including a hammei and a pair of pincers. This remarkable object lesson In the passion of Christ may be said to commence with the de­ nial of Peter, which is represented by the frolicsome cock surmounting th« whole curious structure. Not All Taffy. “Can you tell me who Ananias was?” asked the old man of the proprietor of the book store. "Of course I can." was the reply. “Hs was the ¿hampion liar of the world at one time. Did anyone call you Ana­ nias?” "Yes. sir. Yea, call«M me Ananias; smi durn my buttons if I didn't think he was giving me s bushel of praise. Next man calls me Ananias won’t know what house fell on him."—Washington PosL A Literary Shock. “I’m very fond of whisL" said Mr. Meekton. "Henrietta aud 1 p ay it a great deal." ”1 have Just been reading np on th* game." "I never look at such books. They affect me tike downright Impertinence. The men who wrote some of them seem to think they know more about th* game than Henrietta does."—Wishing ton Stax i ♦