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About Yamhill reporter. (McMinnville, Or.) 1883-1886 | View Entire Issue (Dec. 6, 1883)
B.A trwor; A MOTHER'S LOTJ. A COMMERCIAL INTERVIEW tinction; and altogether he was precise AN ODD TEAM Who cun fathom a i ly the sort of gay, plausible, pretentious There's many a trouble “Good morning, sir.” Aequamtanees may j w. Photographs of lovely Society Belle* individual whom an impulsive and sus Would burst like a bubble, These words were uttered in an em us; our nation be proud J“'1 H And into ths waters of Lethe depart, Offered to tue Public. ceptible girl might exalt into a prince of A Mau Who 11 am Utilised the G reut phatic style by a rather short man with Di<l not we rehearse it, Lover of Dog Meat. n humanity may bless uh , vet. perfection. a red face, large hat, gold-headed cane, And tenderly nurse it, not equal it. 7 4 But if Eve was faultily impulsive, she t: and shirt-front ornamented with a single And give it a permanent place in the heart “Photographs of English and Ameri was tempered by an inuate abhorence of The mother makes tlie i A man who lives near Noble’s Lake big diamond, as he entered the Coinmer- can society ladies for sale here,” reads that little circle Rhe is tbeH r < Theis's manv a sorrow all that is insincere and ignoble. She dal Bulletin sanctum the other day, Would vanish a,-morrow. has demonstrated the theory thut alli the card in a Broadway window up was vexed with her promised husband; and all are subjects to he. ;M Were we but willing to furnish the wings; having successfully passed the outposts ( ■ she was momentarily dissatisfied with gators can be domesticated and made and guards against intruders. town. Around the announcement were What a field she la, So sadly intruding. And quietly brooding. him. perhaps; she had meant possibly useful. Several years ago he captured ¡J T “Good morning, Bir,” said the com hung photographs of prominent celebri how often she feels faint It hatches out all sorts of horrible things. to tease and arouse him. But then her two young alligators and put them in a mercial editor, stopping in the midst of ties and well-known beauties. Inside, to fulfil the trust; but luotk.»! pretty little assumptions of tyranny and How welcome the seeming an article on the cotton trade, and run the store was thronged with customers, fail. No one shuns such tlI1 1 Of looks that are beaming, criticism had always seemed to amuse small |>ond which he had arranged for ning his eye hastily over his visitor. handsomely-dressed ladies and faultlesly votion. She is the hut u> Whether o« e’s wealthy or whether one’s poor! him; and he had never liefore mani the purpose. He fed them well, gave “I, sir,” continued the latter, “I, attired men, all porting over great packs the first to forgive. When Eyes bright as a larry, fested the slightest irritation at her most them all the dog and other delicacies sir, am the head of a nail concern in of photographs. A wait of half an hour mothers we do not mean th«e ¡3 kt’f Cheeks red as a cherry, Iti ’Idle groan ami the curse and the heartache can capacious and tantalizing nnsids. they could eat, and was rewariied by New York.” brought the proprietor to the front with unnatural, and degraded , " ] cure. mean mothers in the full ''""J She had, doubtless, allowed the fiat- 11 “Yes, sir; lager or bottled .”’ the apology that because of a new de tering attentions of Mr. Chadock with seeing them develop into the finest Res dved to be merry, parture in the selling of photographs he word. Thut there are ,1»^] If “ What? ” some coquettish gratification; but she specimens of their race. A gentleman All worry to ferry “Lager or imported; bottledorpale?” had hardly time to attend to the wants natural mothers, «.win, we we know Ktiow. g i;,,, ?I lor A Croat the fumed waters that bid us forget, could scarcely lie blamed if she pre who recently visited Noble’s Lake, thus roared the editor, thinking his visitor those with such, and IUa u ’ g, .I Huch, and tnak, of his customers. Ami no longer fearful, bk fend the wealthier and more fortunate descrilies the extent to which the alli “What is the latest attraction? Wliy, thankful for ours. was deaf. But happy ami cheerful. ar We feel life has much that's worth living for man, whose devotien was so unmistak gators have become useful: With what gratitude we think “What the deuce are you talking haven't you heard? It is the attraction ■ti.i ...... ... “"'»I * able and persistent. And then Reuben yet. mother ’s love. She it r___ about? ” said ths stranger, growing red tiiat beauty — especially American While standing on the bank of the "* whoa had never seemed to care; he had never der in the face. “I am sir, interested beauty—has for all of us. A number of us to walk, and soothed our ,3 LEAF FROM LIFE. interposed the smallest jealous remon- lake I heard a terrible splashing, and in a nail house in New York.” I New York society ladies have jiermitted troubles, and through llur I strance; to accuse him of jealousy was looking far over the water among the Sh'1 didn't like me when we met— “Ale house! Ah, Isee, Englishman; their photographs to be put on sale,“and with firm, gentle, and »,¿3 But turned away and posted, . insolent, cruel, and ridiculous. cypress trees, I saw a man approaching we call ’em saloons, sir, in this country : this is the result,” indicating the hand guided us, keeping us nJ Twas v« ry cool, 1 ow n, to get She was too willful and too provoked in a boat. He did not use an oar, and mostly kept by Germans, though. Cool crowded store. “I cannot supply the unspotted from the world, andj At tint a snub ao final, vet just then to vouchsafe any amends for the boat was making such headway that weather for beer just now, sir.” I clung to hope, and doubted. 'demand fast enough, and am entirely when with wondering and ►tanJ her offense ; that grieved him more than I was ut a loss to understand the motive “Beer! what tie devil do I care out of the best-selling beauties. I knew we looked out upon the worbi uil Strange a* it Heems, a few »hurt weeks she could know. But after he had left power, when the man seeing me, thrust about beer? I came to see you aliout there would be a great call for these pared to commence the struaJ Confirmed my sanguine gueaaCH; her, coldly, with averted face and angry a long stick, which he carried, into the your price quotations. I am a nail man pictures, of course, but I had no idea our aim in life, what priceless^ I came to understand her freaks. eyes, she began to feel somewhat peni water and seemed to tap something. Ami even d ired to kiss her cheeks ufacturer.” that the proffer of a photograph of a few what gentle warnings, and whatj And stroke her golden tresses. tent a id wholly uncomfortable. Immediately the course of the boat was “An ale manufacturer! Beg your simple American girls would produce fill encouragement she Iiestowed.1 For a long time she sat by the w in changed, and in a moment more it had pardon, but what do you charge a bar Not here does it end. WieJ So time went on, and as we grew such a craze. Why, sir, during the dow meditating, absently watching the stopped near where I stood. Then I rel? Of course we should quote lager To know* each other better. short time that the photograph of Frank have passod and one by one the big snowflakes whirling down through discerned tho boat had been pulled by by the barrel. Been a pretty good hop She bravely learned to ki s in ■ too; Work’s beautiful daughter has been in dreams of childhood and vwthl Ami wfi.m she strangely tried to woo, the icy air. two enormous alligators at least ten season this year, hasn’t it?” my window I have sold 600 copies of it been shattered; when tired ij So in ho v I used t > let her. Presently a curious figure appeared feet long. They were harnessed up, “Young man, if you think you can heartened with defeat —andM through the thick white storm, bobbing wore collar and liames and back-bands. play any of your jokes upon me you're at least, and am kept busy continually The privilege still yet is mine ordering more. And this Brooklyn deeply that our lives have l«J With kiss her lips to smother; through the deep soft drifts, and halted “You seem to have a rapid team,” I mistaken; and if you don't keep a civil Still round my neck she likes to tw ine at length on t ie lowest step before her said, exhibiting as little surprise as pos tongue in your head there will be one girl, too,” taking up a card from which urea, then how patiently she H ‘i soft, white a-ms. I’ll dropaline. door. The figure was that of an ex- sible, knowing that astonishment on of the liveliest hop seasons right here the piquant face of a fluffy blonde looked show us where we have lieen I guess, and ask her mother. out, “has sold almost equally well. ouh ; and when our feet have J ! tremely aged man, whose long locks, my part would close his mouth as to you ever saw!” Why do they sell so rapidly? For the and how to take a firmer hold j This rhyme pnsiuces envy, strife | white as snow around him, clung damp- any information that he could impart. “Joke,” roared the man of merchan same reason, I suppose, that people go asking us to still persevere, andiH Within your reaso.. maybe; I ly about his pallid and w ithered cheeks. “ Yes, pretty pert team. ” So let me‘take a leaf from life: dise quotations; “my dear sir, the joke wild over the mutilated Venus of Milo. we may not win the prize, haveij | He looked as sorrowful, as honestly de- Her mother is my darling wife, “Were they hard to train?” man is down stairs; this is a serious I knew no better reason.” that we have striven manfullyf«| And she my blessed baby. ! serving in his evident misery, as could “No, not much. General Grant, department. What is it you wish to Through a mother’s influence J Further up Broadway, near Madison have looked the beggar, who had ex thar,” tapping the leader, “was a little know about lager beer and ale, any square, Charles L. Ritzman advertised blest names have been placed onJ cited Reuben ’ s generous pity aisl Eve ’ s REUBEN’S EEGGAR. stubborn, but Mr. Beecher, thar,” tap how?” photographs of beauties and celebrities and looking down from heaven! careless scorn. ping the other monster, “was mighty “Confound your lager beer and ale! from all over the world. Said he : mothers must have wept forjot| “You were more kind than wise. While the man crouched there, shiv easy.” I came here about the price of nails.” “I have lieen trying for years to in they had given to the world Charity ought to begin at home,” Eve ering, Mr. Chadock, wearing a stylish “Why did you select such names for “Nails?” duce American ladies in society here to who had written their nameij Walworth, said, with a very decided and ulster, and swinging a costly cane jaun them ?” “Yes, N-A-I-L-S—nails. I told you place their photographs on sale and am page of Fame, and, better »till.eJ tily with his fastidiously gloved fingers, unamiable pout. “Wall, you see, I call the leader I was a nail manufacturer.” | at last succeeding. With the advance them on the hearts of men. “I hate maxims,” Reuben Wright re came briskly toward the house. Grant ’cause he hardly ever opens his There was a suppressed snicker from of cultivation and wealth this public Mothers, do not think thatywl torted, half in annoyance, half indig Those expressive black eyes were very mouth, an’ I call this one Beecher ■ the manufacturing editor on the other display of personal charms was bound sphere is not great enough foryj nantly. “And I really could not repulse unbeautiful, the expression of his aris ’cause he opens his mouth on all occa side of the room; a faint ha! ha! ha! to come in, just as fox-hunting and valets ents: all that you have is not toel the old fellow, Eve,- he seemed so sick tocratic countenance was very hateful, sions. See him. Don’t care what you that came through the thin partition at the opera have been introduced. for those rising men and woiuJ and miserable; his distress seemed so as, with a coarse and untimely exclama are talkin' about, politics or religion, shut out tho financial editor, as the Some people may call it a straining after are to take their place in the J I tion, he lifted his elegant cane for an Mr. Beecher here will open his mouth, that genuine.” man of commercial quotations arose and English effect, ora kind of Anglomania, letters and in the paths tlutll “And because an ordinary beggar untimely blow upon the white head of but the General don’t pay no attention, begged his visitor to be seated, and was but it is nothing of the kind. It is glory and to God. I happened to seem all that, you gave him the old man, whose startled protest but shutting one eye, sorter, he opens soon deep in the mysteries of ten and simply carrying out the noblesse oblige Deem not your lives idle, rad vainly jl your last dollar and walked five miles sounded strangely distinct through the the other and seems to be lookin’ away twenty pennies.—[Boston Commercial idea of the upper classes. I would, if Fame; I through the dreadful storm,” the girl peculiarly resonant winter air. off in the future.” Bulletin. called upon, put the matter in this She who makes home happy vim ia said contemptuously, “I do not won “I bes here for Wister Wright, when name. I “What are these things floating Vieside daughters and wives of light: The ~ der Will Chadock was amused; Will he'll be coinin’.” Eve, watching at the the team?” IN PORT ROYAL, WEST INDIES. Fifth avenue and Murray Ilill possess would do nothing so absured, I am cer window, heard him say. “He bes a “Gourds. You see if it wan’t fur A real fat, shiny black baby is far A BENEVOLENT BIRD. rale gintieman—God love him!—as lint them, the alligators would sink when from being a disagreeable object, but wealth, social position, and beauty. tain. They cannot very easily divide the There in one very mid case of II The young man's dark eyes flashed me the dollar in the storm this day they stop. They can float when they tlie mongrel type is. There is some -and his cheeks flushed a sullen red. week. Yess may save yer tine cane. want to, but nothin’ would give ’em thing absolutely uncanny in being stared former among the hoi palloi—the com lenee of one animal toward if . “I am equally certain that Willis Mis<er Chadock, or another tine thafe more pleasure than to sjnk an’ leave me at by a dull, dusky, muddy little face mon people—but they can let the public which r I iowh that help is often I share, in a certain limited way, in their where leant nmqiected. would never do anything of the kind,” like yerself, for thaving it is, and no less, in the lurch.” with reddish hair, rather light eyes, Who would suppose that he returned in nettled tones. “I admit owin’ money as ye does to your both “In what way do you reap a benefit enormous blubber lips, and protruding beauty. And in doing this I think with its great size and massive« that he is quite incapable of any indis ers. F. ith, I know ye well. Yeeshad from working these great lizzards, other stomach propped upon spindle-shanks, they deserve praise.” “Apart from this desire to benefit the could bo in need of Huch aid ji cretion in the score of generosity.” betther pay back the thray hundred dol than by enjoying tlie oddity of the per with the leg in the middle of the foot. public, have the ladies no personal significant a creature as al'idl “I hate sarcasm,” the girl said lofti lars yees borrowed of Misther Wright formance?” The two types do not assimilate. There feeling in this departure?” give it? ly and with roguish intent. “It is even when lie had the plenty' than be bating He looked at me with an expression are perhaps few countries under English “There is such a sentiment as vanity, Against such large animals il more objectionable than quoting prov- an honest, man wid your unholy sthick. ef pity and replied: “Don’t you see? rule where to marry and be given in -orbs. But I dare say Will would not It is yerself as would have the swate Why, I haul wood across the lake for marriage is considered so superfluous an j and our New York belles, when they tigers and rhinoceroses it caul mind; conscious of superiority, he can throuble if I tells Misther Wright how the railroad, an’ am the only man in affair. Fresh from home, it is rather a I place their photographs on sale, are not itself, but against tiny insects. ■ afford to ignore or despise any spiteful yees put up the mind of a dhirty lawyer this community that can do it. The shock on reading the local papers to I wholly uninfluenced by it. I see no might crush under its feet by« i to chute him of his own legacy. If it cypress trees are to thick for a steam see announcements made quite naively reason why a woman, simply because dred, it has no protection esnq animadversion.” Reuben turned toward her with a bes tiie gurril yees would deeaive away boat, an’ pullin’ a boat with oars would and as a matter of course that with us j she is in private life, should hide the is given it by a little feathered I ■e ans With such a thick skin as it ■ I from him by yer thrieks to kape him be out of the question. Another ad would be concealed not only till death, ; light of her beauty under a bushel.” look of unaffected surprise. “So they rather enjoy the innocent might well suppose that the« I was “You seem fairly confident about the j down wid the poor, then yeeshad bether vantage I have is, that when the wood | but long after: “The friends and ac. would have no trouble from 1 J.v " man's perfections,” he commented in a1 lie goin’ back to the ould counthry to is in a marsh where the water is too <iuaintances of Mr. W. . T. Taylor are 1 notoriety ?’ ’ “Why not? Look at the illustrious but, in truth, it is the very thirl! ■ with ( displeased and questioning voice. the ill-treated colleen who ought to be shallow for a row boat, this team drags • requested to attend the remains of his examples after whom they copy. Here its hide which makes the soulll ■M« >rn : : “Of course I should never presume your thru > wife.” my boat over all right.” mother, Miss Mary Cole, from his I IG ol I that you could he jealous of an inferior,” The girl's cheeks burned scarlet as Something popped like slapping two residence, No. 5 Lower East street, to I are photographs of every royal person- dangerous. Ticks, which are abundant ill lotlii-r. shir answered rashly and rudely. she listened. In an instant she had sprung large boards together and looking the place of interment at 4:30 this even I age in Europe, and should not American ' queens of society have equal privileges ? eats, work their way into the 1 ■e.” “Andi should never have presumed; from her seat and Hung open the door, around I saw the hind legs of my fine ing. Please let vour carriage attend. !, ’ “Who would not prefer a photograph the skin of the huge creature.! ■My m that you could be so ungracious and' and stood gazing with s athing contempt setter dog protruding from Mr. Beecher’s Returning the call of a visiting acquaint- 1 III to li - of Mrs. W. K. Vanderbilt, Mrs. Gerald the skin is so thick they are down upon Willis Chadock, who was mouth. silly.” he declared crossly. anee once, I was presented with much I “Am 1 ungracious because 1 cho< s > I perceptibly uneasy, although there was “Great Ciesar, sir, your devilish rep formality to “my wife's mother, Miss! Hoyat, Miss Fannie Swan, or Miss bury themselves so completely»! ■Yes." can not be scraped off when tb[ IY.. u u- to return satire for satin-'.”’ she queried : brazen assurance and an odious sneer tile has eaten my dog!” Barnes,” and received with affability by i Marion Langdon to one of the baby still upon his countenance. defensively. “Oh, yas, so I see. I told you that a starched saffron-tinted female of j faced Princess Maria Christina, King ing animal rubs against rocks iff lYes, r “Miss Eve, my dear girl,” he began Mr. Beecher always had his mouth severe aspect. Among the lower orders Alfonso's much-talked of wife, or of the A differently constructed atiinal |"'as « I “Anr I silly because I approve the Princess of Wales. There are few New use its teeth or feet to remonl ■it vol good sense ot a gentleman who—who inellifiuously; but she interrupted him open.” I a stray child or two comes as an acci York belles that are not more beautiful novance ; but for th* elephant,■ I1V-H —” she suddenly hesitated with a bril by an imperious gesture. “But it was the closing of the mouth uvuiaiuvvurrvnve. dental occurrence, uiiti and it- it is the vne muuier, mother, • «• ... , liant blush that was rather enlightening “I believe all this poor man has as that deprived me of my dog.” poor thing! who has to bring it up and “C<>T. ‘ of these whom nothing but suffering and torMj lO, con serted’” she said tiimly and haughtily. to her aroused lover. “That’s so, an’ right here I’ll giveyou feed it; beyond thin its wants are few; ; tlie public delights to honor,” spread some kind friend lends a IwW ■ bush r I ly, ani With extreme irony and some exag And as he lioweil submissively and a pinter on Mr. Beecher,” and I thought one little ragged shirt per annum, a ' ing out portraits of Lady D.insdale, Lady —or bill. And this kind friend is not J ■nil of I geration he finished the incomplete sen turned away lie understood that thence that he spoke of pointer because the corner under the bed, a tuck-out of vam j ; Dudley, Lady Castlereagh, and Mrs. forth he must be a stranger to her and thing had eaten my setter, but for no sooner are the little PJ [sir!" , tence for her. I 1 seeing and mealie per diem, and a bit of sugar- Cornwallis West.” “Who desires perhaps to succeed in hers. “It is a pity,” he continued, with fortablv ensconced than a nab j [self up that lie had no intention of t making making a cane to suck at, is all they ever get. A your affections my most unlucky self,” At the sound of her voice the old man pun I allowed him to proceed. “Mr. wedding is far too expensive an affair j some warmth, “that our native beauties bright, yellow eyes searched tiff lO, that tottered to his feet, and extended to Beecher,” continued the man, “nearly to’be entered upon lightly; everything . should not be permitted to take rank at and the next moment a pretty fl I about lie said. The irony, the accusation implied, ward her a large and rather grimy en always has his mouth open, and never must be en regie, or not at all; thus the top of the list where they properly colored beak plucks them Mfl B’er wh stung the spirited and perverse girl to a velope. shuts it only when it’s to his advantage. it is often put off from year to year, belong, and any feeling which prevents owner of the eyes and. lieaksfl [Kir! P “it lies for Misther Wright—thegintle- Mr. Beecher, in fact, ojiens his mouth because £9 is required for a stiff white the public exhibition of their charms is ful, snow-white heron; small «j [Ilet Vo; swift unreasoning resentment. I «ide “Ill hu k is hut a synonym of incom man as lent me a dollar,” he exclaimed for other folks, but shuts it for him corded silk for the swarthy bride, and false modesty, to say the least. This but large of heart; for it I’. Pii petence, or of what is none the less de as lie turned and hobbled away. self. Good day, sir. Who, haw! gee another £10 for ex|>enses, none of which city will of course take the initiative in Northern Africa at least,fohattff plorable—ignorance of thrift; injudi And while she marveled at the oddity thar, general. Come here,” and with a is forthcoming. The bride’s attire in a introducing this custom and the pro its life to the benevolent work ■ Bn she cious lilM-i-l;‘y, indiscriminate charity.” of it all. Reuben himself eanie slowly flutter and flounce the lxiat was soon general way does not suggest a neces vincial cities will naturally follow. A ing over its monstrous profejr I [This i through the drifts and ascended the lost to view. she sain narslily and slyly too. It is a novel and beautifa ■ courageous ladies ---- have sity for such splendor; a black cotton few sensible, ... 5 . - “You begrudge my poor Ireggar his steps. garment, washed and worn to a dirty ''l'pl“‘” , ** an,‘ ln a very short see the dark-skinned giant01 T| [Banim. alms, obviously,” Reuben remarked, "I have come back to make peace green, together with a gay turban . lmeJ «hall offer to the public photo gle stalking ponderotuly alot^ff ■> Vour HE GOT LEFT. [divorce laughing despite his vexation. with you, Eve,” he said simply; “I smelling much of cocoanut-oil, usually i™'11S ° . nearb’ every lady of pro- many as a score of these . .... * mmonno wifhir» t I perched upon his ba< k and -ra I. loved He loved her with a man’s la-st love mean if you still have any affection for minence within the charmed circle. He was courting a Boston belle, one ; adorns her person : but it is the custom —this slender girl with her bright face, one so unlucky as 1 am.” p is to of the Beacon Hill aristocracy, He ! and they will not be persuaded that to feel really ashamed to see such a de ily working to free him to'™ J I she’s “1 am sorry I grieved you, dear,” her dazzling eyes of bonny blue, her wished to impress upon her esthetic, I hoard for long years, only to squander mand for Mrs. Langtry’s pictures when tormentors. And full wellt be over sliining hair of richest gold; and she she answered with charming frankness. here are a dozen cultivated American knows what he owes hi« susceptible mind that he was way up in all on the"wedding.day, isjwasteful and [You sc was to l>e his wile, sometime, when he But goodness'—what does ¡tailmean?” the classics, and that he was a young ridiculous. Many good clergymen never girls with face and figure far outshining Not for anything would he would have made a home fitting for one she cried as she glanced over the paper ugly-tempered as he often 'J I tried t take a marriage fee. hoping thereby to the English actress.” gentleman of culchah. Said he : he had just unfolded. so fair.and proud and d vint) . “M ill these ladies receive commissions when the sharp l>eak prrieDJ Iket. “My stellar soul, the pleiades of my encourage weddings. He love.l her unutterably—this hand “It means, my darling,” he said in [Bosh! from the sale of their likenesses?’ the sensitive flesh, the solar center, you are magnificent as the [k! Mi some, ungrateful girl, for whose sake lie wonder, “that my beggar is not a beg W iiy the M inistkr Ilan a T hin “ Certainly not. The idea is absured. bearH the pain patienflbij constellation Hercules, as charming as [, excep had been unlucky; his prospect of a gar at all. He is one of the most Urso Major, as regular in outline as I S kin .—Rev. Dr. S . ■ . who happens If the fair ones needed money their at know that it is neceasary.-l *■ goodU’ legacy had lawn s|s>iled by some eccentric men in the city, a miser by titude towards the public' would be man, in St. Nicholas. 1 I onions Aquilla, and as transcendentally stately I to possess a rather florid complexion, singuvar legal technicality; a prodigal reputation, and very wealthy. This is | recently went into the shop of a barber changed and their photographs would r as the great Southern Cross, with the and unscrupulous partner had bank his cheek—a loan until I shah have fNever ! I —one of his parishioners—to lie shaved. be worthless.” A B ird ' s E videnc « — Af* beautiful proportions of the Isosceles ■ ’’’ Resuming his gossip after escaping I rupted a tolerably pro-perous business prospered sufficiently for convenient The barber was addicted to an occasional in London, a parrot'« Triangle.” [‘Pooh ! and an insolvent bank had completed payment—for an amount quite enough spree, after which,his hand was apt to from a fastidious customer who detained 1 cepted as evidence, and e«-‘ Said she: “ Young man, you had | ? . . ww narT fl I thumb for me to re-establish my business and the ruinous category. him half an hour in purchasing one missal ! be somewhat unsteady. In shaving from the Baiti ’ h M best square the circle, box the compass, The home that was to lie so dear and to claim my bride whenever she may l>e picture, he said: “There is another! gineer who had held “Jin Be wher and make a bee-line for the milky-way | | the minister on the occasion referred to delightful seemed sadly far away; and pleased to come to me.” f a bass and the planetary Orion. When yon I ' he made a slit and brought the blood to good that will result from the general fourteen years. The ’ b t not latterly the manner of his lietrotheil the surface in a considerable quantity. le* j were introduced to me, I inferred that ' The minister turned to the man and introduction of this English system of brought from India Mners.” wife had leen neither comforting nor ' public photographs. Young men will hundred parrots. One "I1 you were a man; blit I have diagnosed Is in ‘ ri»lexe<r^ A K rocer grossly insulted Mrs. mv encouraging. Her mood | brother, and said, in a tone of solemn be enabled to possess themselves of [ j ing to an officer, was n’l*l |lia ‘I ll pat « L. oi. »* the ♦ I >. ■ other ■ y# I... v day .!.««• without *«•. ♦ 1, . « • s intending ■ .. a.. •> your mental and physical proportions, Gotlin I be rus and depri-ssed him; her little sharp and you turn out to be only an astro severity: “Yon see. Jackson, what the portraits of their lady acquaintances was instituted, and it rtpeeelm«, her saucy little affectations it. She was an immensely stout woman, comes from taking too much drink.” without embarassment to themselves or screw tunnel, where it *** ,. psand I nomical idiot with false pretensions to [‘What a that one he deemed so witty and charm and stepping upon the scales playfully occult geometry, concerning which yon “Yes sah," replied Jackson, “it makes to the ladies in question. Many ladies hie for the accused engin*■ *ted th, ing, he now fancied were altogether too requested the grocer to weigh her. As de skin very tendah, »ah. It do for a would be glad to have such a souvenir The question next arose • know as little as a western cow-boy does P up he meaning; and he could only feel grieved he aifjusted the weights he remarked in possession of their male friends, but' the special parrot ahont fack, sah. ” ’ about ball-room etiquette. There is the png th< and affronted. And more galling than that she weighed ISO |s>unds, which the pieture cannot be well made a gift. jiearance the trcnble h*t j door, sir; get!” Iked off A New York musical writer claims to This, you see, offers a safe way out of prosecution relied on the all was the notion that Wtllie Chadock proved to be her exact weight. “How J Kill bo, And he got without further ceremony, I did yon i iwne to guess it? ” she asked. have discovered ’hat neither “The Star- the dilema.” 'iad in some way made “the little rift sation" more than on «iff yn i kick u —[Chicago Tribune. “ I am used to guessing at weights. I I Spangled Banner” nor “Hail Columbia” zithin the lute” that was silencing all | Among the photographs of American of its color or the shal* 3 ------------- »—■ ----- [awe I are-original American tunes, but that beauties which sold best were those of te music, embittering all the sweet- j weighed hogs for five years in Cincin nati.” The woman who doesn’t like her nose both were stolen from old German au. the Hon. Mrs. Ro. hr. nee Fannv Work, The engineer «»• »t tim,- 1 ess. of his pleasant love dream. caahiereiL This is l>r0~“J can have it remodeled in Brooklyn for I 1 thors. This discovery will not disconr. daughter of Frank Work, and Lady j dinn Will CTiadoek was an undeniably fas- ' case ever decide«! on ’’a*1 r71 idog» ”' Ask a friend for the loan of a sover ♦25. She will l>e cautioned not to blow age any American citizen. Where “The Randolph Churchill, nee Miss Jerome, ! inating man; not so yottrjg certainly, .J ait he had an aristocratic countenance, eign through a telephone ami he will it for threw months after the operation. Star-Spangled Banner” and “Hail daughter of Leonard W. Jerome. All transient men who !’^1 Here is a Columbia" __ _______ came ____ from is a matter of high bred mein, and great expressive say • I cannot understand. Come here —[Detroit Free Press. A large demand was expected for the tela are “traveling ’a*’“ J -lack eyes, and he was a master of min at three o'clock.” At three o’clock the chance for Alice Marguerite King, who indifference so long as we know that pictures of Mr. Vanderbilt’s daughter, 1 cling men are not ing flattery. He was considered too as man wlx> could not understand will lie sued a Nashville paper for saying she the tune to “Beautiful Snow" was not Lady Mandeville, and that of Miss mere.” It is a >*a"— had a big nose. [ stolen. , |.mnaagw of wealth and some dis- somewhere else. Chamberlayna. which liad 1>« m onlstwd. should sail himself » h’11'1 I 101 TROUBLE-BORROWERS. J J 3