Image provided by: Yamhill County Historical Society; McMinnville, OR
About Yamhill reporter. (McMinnville, Or.) 1883-1886 | View Entire Issue (Sept. 13, 1883)
HE WOULD BEE HER LATER.
game. If the dealer drops any money
A. young man living in Cummins
in making change then the ace and
k »merle»«« Sailer-H« Strlvr. to ll„. yule, O„ abont to be married to the
king should be played to lose. If a
.. Command«*—What Tradition lady of his choice, wanted something
Superstition» of the Gambiern ’‘When
are Exported to Fill Vacancies--Chang
Over head—The policeman’s club. the Kertii are Coining We i’luy ’Em Fur negro enters a room smoking, the
original ami romantic connected with ing Eyes.
jack should be played to win. If two
all They‘re Worth.”
The boss stump speaker—a one
the ceie irony. He had heard of neo
negroes enter arm in arm, then play
pie being married in the deep’ re
the ten as a winner for all it’s worth ”
I The American sailor, as lie went on cesses
“When the kerds are coming we —(Santa Fe Cor. 1'hila Press.
I «bore in foreign ports, jauntily a balloon, boys; but no balloon was “We Hell from 100 to 150 artificial pockets.
a year,” said a Philadelphia op
play ’em for all they’re worth. Make
I Jrsssed in his well fitting, well made convenient, and a trip to the cave eyes
AMEBIC AN FABLES.
tician, “and the demand seems to
the dealers’ eyes start out of their
I ••shore toggery.” was the envy of the was too expensive. So he finally hit grow
A Fox who had been dugout of hia
greater every year. There is a cold comfort after all.
sockets, and don’t stop the lick ’till
a wedding cn horseback
I male, and the admiration of the gen upon
The tailor’s goose is now believed
den by a Peasant, and was about to
I tier population of the town that he he had u dim recollection of having goods, for they sell at $10 to $15 each, to lie the dude.
be knocked on the head, cried out:
I graced with his presence. With the read of such a thing Irefore, but it according to grade; but when you A great deal of flash literature changes. This advice was given me “Hold on! Hold on! You are about
the other day by one of the old to murder an innocent Fox!’’
I ¿r of « lold and the ProdiKa,‘ty of a was romantic anyhow, and quite consider the trouble and annoyance comes by telegraph.
“Blit here are the feathers of my
timers, during a conversation regard
I spendthrift, he created an impression
ing faro and other games which are missing hens.’’
so briefly noticed. He the fitting involves anil the time it still be all out of sorts.
I not soon to be eradicated from the newspapers
“Yes, I admit the presence of hen’s
wanted a sensation that would be the consumes you can easily see that
Correct Boston people call a bur played at most frontier towns openly feathers,
I minds of the natives, and his depart- talk
but deny the killing. Take
I ore was viewed with a genuine regret, tiaie, and begot, it.
. me before the law. If I am guilty
I 8npplemented by the wish for his Neither he nor his affianced were We never have a customer that is
“I made a run at Gracia's one the law will punish me.”
I speedy return, or the hope that, adepts in equestrianism, the minister satisfied with his new eye at the first should advertise bar gains.
The Peasant relented, and the Fox
night and scooped ’em to the tune of
I should he fail to again visit them, he engaged mounted a horse on that ’trying on.’ Within a day or two be The thread of a narrative is not
_ _ $4,000, and before they know’d they was arraigned on charge of murder.
I the time might be short when others occasion for the first time in his life,'
the one the binder uses to hold the
The case seemed clear enough when
were hurt, and when Charley was the prosecution rested, but the oppos
I vf his nationality would call at the and the result was a surprise to all I comes buck and claims that the color leaves together.
I place, l’rior to the deplorable de- parties. All reached the rendezvous, is a shade lighter or a shade darker The next time a man at Niagara at bankin’, I tapped him for over $8,000 ing counsel arose and remarked:
I cline of the white sailed merchant which was out on the Reading road, than the good eye, or that they don’t tempts t-> shoot the rapids he will do inside of thirty minutes, and then "Your Honor, the prosecution has
I marine, now almost entirely driven after ovruc
turned damned fool and blew it in failed to prove that all of this oc
some little UUUU1C)
Wilt'Ll I match in some other way. There ¡ b it with a gun.
I from the field by steamers, the ships they drew
at Gold’s. My rule, young fellow, curred in the County of Posey, and
I Were almost entirely officered and horses
? .J . ! I ! over our whole stock until the eye is from a salt water bath that figures is to stop when luck changes, and it’s I demand my client’s discharge.”
I manned by native-born Americans, nervous and fearful. The bride and matched, and our time and trouble don’t lie.
a durned good rule, but I can no
“I discharge the prisoner,” said the
I and the sight of a foreigner as a groom couldn’t get their steeds Dear must count for something. We have The man who drinks nothing but more follow it than a doctor can his Judge, “ami I would warn the pro
I member of the crew was a rare one. enough together to take hold of their a number of steady customers who cistern water is the one who leaves own medicine. When I’m winnin’ I secution that it further weakened its
I The personnel of the.same service in hands, so that preliminary was neces- ' always buy their eyes of us and bring well ecough alone.
want to break the bauk; when I lose, case by not showing whether hens
I to-day completely changed, and the sarily omitted.
I play on hoping for a good streak. have feathers or bristles.’’
them to us to be cleaned and re When a woman smiles from ear to Sometimes she comes, sometimes she
I American sailor, of whom tradition The minister began:
ear it’s real mean to say that her doesn’t,”
I has taught his countrymen to be “If any one knows any reason why paired.
killed the bens,
gambler ’ s signs .
I proud, has become a thing of the this couple should not be united, let “They are made at Stutzebach in
and it's a wonder the prosecution
There is a limit to American am,
I past and is rapidly disappearing him—’’
didn’t think of it.
the Thuringian Forest, in Germany, bition. We do not care to take the
I from actual existence. In the halcyon Here the groom’s charger began to j i and
gamblers are very superstitious about
the works employ a large force rag off the Egyptian cholera.
THF. OWL AND THE FARMER.
I javsof American commerce, not. only rear and plunge as if charged with j | of skilled
It is wonderful
who was reconnoitering a
I were the ships manned by Americans, vital information on that point which i how closely workmen.
“Superstitious! I should say so.
they imitate the human Iways afoot—The twelve inch rule.
I but, in nine cases out of ten, all the he was eager to unload. He was j organ of sight.
They may look bold and free and Farmer’s hen coop, was caught, by
Always ahead The source of a easy, but I tell you every one of ’em the leg in a steel trap, and held fast
I younger memtiers of the crew were coaxed into comparative submission, | , is ____
„ . that cannot be almost per | | river.
I from the best families of the land. but as he broke out more violently j fectly
has more superstition to the square until the toil hardened agriculturist
I Merchants' sons, farmers’ boys and than before when the minister again "Do matched.
than a mule has kicking power. came out in the morning to finish
ey rs wear out?”
I even college graduates entered the called for objections to the bans, the i “Ob, artificial
at old Hill—quiet, clever man him.
yes, tin eye wears out in about
"Sir! What is the moaning of this
I ship’s forecastle in the most menial question was^not
lived, generally speaking, bnt
mi.„ bride, I tWo years. The salt and other alka
outrage!” demanded the owl.
I capacity, and served long and faith- who was engaged
struggle with line substances in the tear duct
“You were after my Poultry,’’ was
I fully toward the attainment of the her palfry to keep in him a from
if you bear a man say that there interfere with one of his net super the reply.
standing eventually eat oil’ the polish and the
I goal of their ambition—to become the on bis head, begged hysterically
is very little gambling going on at stitions and he'll curse a blue streak.
"We will let the Law settle that
commander of a ship. \\ ith that the nuptials be consummated as quires to be repolished.”
present you can safely infer that he He’s a great believer in spiders. Let point.
I will see if a free born Ame
bright prospective star ever before quickly as possible, as she wanted to “We have some customers—ner knows no better.
one of them black, ugly things be
rican Owl is to be treated in this
their eyes, they mastered the intri. go right home. Meanwhile the minis vous an«! excitable people—who are
Young Muggins recently became a as happy as a dead Injun. Why. lawless manner!”
cacies of ieefing, handling and steer ter’s horse had backed up against constantly changing their eyes, an«! party
a very interesting slight-of one night a stranger dropped in
Being taken into Court, the Owl
ing, hence they climbed to the knowl the fence and was preparing to sit not at all to the betterment of their hand to
His girl gave during the game; the bank was win put. in the defense that no Farmer
edge of seamanship in its various down there in order to make himself appearance. Others provide them him the performance.
forms, and then marched on to vic as comfortable as possible till the selves with several eyes and UBe them
every lay out, and, spying a had any legal right to keep Hens,
The home stretch—The morning ning
tory in the struggle to acquire a show was over He changed bis mind, alternately. Their wearers must yawn.
crawling on Hill's shoulder, and the Judge closed the case by say
The quarter stretch—Two he brushed
thorough and practical acquaintance however, and waltzed around in the take them out at night and keep them fifteen cent
it off and killed it Well, ing:
“While the presence of the owl in
with navigation in order that they middle of the road half a dozen in clean water, for the secretions of
such yelling, and swearing! Hill
L. remarked to his wife that a stopped the game, and the startled the vicinity of the henery goes to
might competently fill the position to times so rapidly that the affrighted the eye would otherwise gather upon
which the chances, which were many parson thought he was surrounded them. Moreover, the muscles that friend “had plenty of grit.” “Well, stranger left the place in a hurry. show that be would prefer Fowl to
and frequent, of promotion might by a regiment of cavalry. As soon keep them in place require frequent yes,” she replied, "he looks as if he Since this Hill has had bad luck, and Hash, the Farmer has failed to prove
needed a bath.”
whether the leap was bought of a
attributes it to the spider’s death.
elevate them. A strong, willing boy, as he could command his breath he rests.”
man with a squint in his left eye or
with an aptitude for the sea, and said to t he groom: “Do you take—”
“What, are the eyes capable of advertising medium. It costs only
a wart on his nose. The Owl is entitled
I governed by the earnest desire to The groom didn’t, but his horse 1 movement?
$100 damages for his injuries, and
I place bimself in the highest attain- did—he took the bits in his mouth “One of ” the great perquisites in twenty-five cents to go to the top of chair during the game. When I to
found out the case I jiiHt raised my the Farmer is jugged for thirty days
I able position on shipboard, would and started up the road on a run. I the removal of an eye, when it be- the column.
for unlawfully obstructing the United
I leave New York, Boston or Salem, Then the bride’s courser made a mad I comes necessary, is to leave the stir At the White Mountains the girls voice with both hands and made a States
I the then three principal “deep water” dash in the opposite direction. The I rounding muscles intact. This is all <‘omb their hair back from tne very pretty speech. The feller apol
(which means long voyage in sailors’ parson's nag hesitated a moment, and ! generally don« by experienced occu- forehead. That is why it is called a ogized and staked me with a hundred
and took his foot away. I started in
vernacular) ports, and at the end of then followed after the groom, and [ lists, but sometimes cases come to us bang-up place.
Keep Owls instead of Hens.
a two or three years “round the horn” when within earshot the parson, with j in whiah the muscles have been re-
THE PEASANT AND THF. ROBBER.
Paper rowing boats were not the and soon swamped the bunk. I tell
to the South American coast for hides rare presence of mind and fearful of I morselessly destroyed, and then we first aquatic craft that weie con you I want no man’s foot on my
A Peasant, who was abroad at night
and copper ore, the “nor’west,” coast losing his fee, shouted at the top of find it almost impossible to make the i structed of that material. Paper cut chair while I’m handling the paste encountered
a highwayman, who
boards. Why that’s Brownie, I’ve
trading with the Indians for furs, his voice: “Do you take—this— artificial substitute look natural. I j ters were made years ago.
seen him throw many a five dollar called out.
or to China or the East Indies, would woman— for your—wedded—wife?” know a pretty young lady whose glass
“Your money or your life!”
ft is reported that an angry passen gold piece away, just because some
| appear once more in his native town
What the reply would have been eye will stare stolidly anil solemnly [ ger threw a porter from a Pullman one
Peasant wanted to live to see
I a bronzed, bearded and stalwart man, cannot be known, as the young man’s at you, as if the owner were inwardly parlor car out West This was prob
«lays without a thunder shower
1 who, after a few weeks’ rest on shore, horse swerved from his course at this accusing yon of some grave offense, ably the biggest tip the porter ever look through his money, and if he’d three
find t he piece the player had changed or a cyclone, and ho therefore emptied
roships in his old vessel, as he by critical moment and plunged into the while her natural eye is twinkling
in, he’d throw it over the housetops, bis pockets of his loose change. But,
this time hail got to call her, as canal along which they were passing. merrily at the joke that she is listen received.
A Pittsburgh man who found his just because the money was bail luck behold, next day he was arrested for
third mate, the first stepping-stone The parson was only stopped by a ing to or at something funny that she
passing counterfeit money, and when
to the proud position for which he toll-gate. He wanted to race back sees. Once, when she was looking gas meter ruined and motionless, for the bank.
“Ob! I tell you these things sound brought into court he discovered that
was aiming. The time occupied for and get the reply of the bride, but as into her pocket-book for some change thought that if the coroner could
his accuser was the man who had
his transition from that humble she bad got too much the start of with her good eye, that terrible arti act in the case, the verdict would be funny, but there’s something in them. robbed him.
official capacity to the more dignified him he concluded to see her another ficial eye twisted itself around in my
“That may all be,” replie«! the
The inebriated party that goes gets nervous and shaky if certain men Judge to his statement, "but do you
strata of ship’s government tilled by time.
direction and glared at me with a
the second, and from hence to the
malevolence that frightened me. It home late at night and sees the top
there’s Mac, he’s a good ’un know whether or not this man made
higher sphere of command held by
was only then that I discovered that of the stairs spinning around should Now,
A SCION OF ROYALTY.
still, he thinks Murphy’s a a mental reservation to return your
the first officer, was, comparatively
it was a glass eye, for it was very
money as soon as he could get work
speaking, quite brief. The time re Gen. Ord was a grandson of George well matched. When I subsequently the fact that tops were made to spin. hoodoo or bad luck for him. and some in a Cider Mill ?”
times he’ll stop dealing when Murphy
quired for him to emerge from the IV., and the second cousin of Queen examined the young lady’s case I
And thereupon he cast the Peasant
A gentleman who had just returned
chrysalis of mate and sport his wings Victoria; and thus a scion of royalty | found that nothing could lie done from Europe was asked how he liked comes in. His partner, Eddleman, into Jail and thanked the Robber for
a full-fledged captain was of course
for her. She must go through life the trip across the ocean. “Not a
“There’s Joe. Just let him meet a his prompt complaint to the law.
of somewhat greater length than that assumed one, to adorn the pages of subject to all kinds of misunderstand bit,” was the reply. “I felt utterly
laJv and the devil himself
required for his other transforma
: ings, just because a surgeon who retched all the way over.”
couldn’t persuade him that he wasn’t
Put your counterfeit money into
tions, as the operation involved the morganatic marriage of King George I didn’t understand his business had
Speaking of the house of a lady going to have good luck. But let bis the Sunday contribution box.
favorable culmination of a number with Mrs. Fitz-Herbert was two chil [ bungled over the operation on her
---------- -------------- •
of circumstances. Owners of course dren—a boy named James and a I eye. I know also, an old gentleman who does not intend to spoil her washerwoman bring home a collar
DISCLAIMED THE RELATIONSHIP.
were not expected to remove old cap younger daughter. After the wife i whose right eye beams with intelli- children by sparing the rod, some ironed on the wrong side and he be
tains simply to make a place for the was separated from the King the I gence and amiability, while his left body remarked how neat and clean lieves bad luck will follow him for a
The man who travels on the rail
new and aspiring candidate, conse daughter remained with her mother, glares gloomilv forth with an air of everything was. “Yes,” said Fogg, week. I’ve seen him stop a big game road and sits down by the side of
quently he had patiently to bide the
i extreme disgust and dissatisfaction
on a different pair of socks from lono females while laboring under
time when the death or retirement of James, was sent to th'is country for with the world.” — (Philadelphia
A citizen of Kentucky “sold his put
what he had intended If his servant the impression that he recognizes a
hia captain, or the launching of a
spectacles off his eyes, for thirty should
forget to black the heel of one likeness in their faces to his wife's
new ship by bis owners should place Catholic priest named Ord. He as
------- ----------- -M»
cents, and then turned right (around of his lioots,
Joe would consider this aunt's cousin, met hia match on one
him in his coveted status. But, as a sumed the name of his tutor and set
the roads in this vicinity lately.
A M inerva of M arv .—In his in of whiskey.” This is simply a trans a sigu of good luck, and would back of
general thing, the thoroughly com tled in Maryland. He married a
He sat down in the half of the seat,
petent mate did not have many years member of the well known Cresap teresting book on "The Marv Oasis,” fer of glasses from above to below his faro game to any amount.
“Ned’s the coolest of all. He be the other half of which was occupied
to await tne longed for situation, as family of that State. The late Gen. just issued, Mr. O’Donovan, of the the nose.
in a streak of luck; and also by a pleasant-faced young lady. His
r new vessels
’ were ‘ being
Some workmen while putting up a has some net superstitions. He be first questiot was:
lowing costume portrait of a Marv sign at a Newport store dropped two
and vacancies as officers thereby as
“Pardon me, miss, but is your name
constantly occurring. - j Boston Hi ier- James Ord, served in the war of 1812, lady: She wore a long shirt of dark of the big letters, both H’s, on th« lievesgood luck will follow him if he, James? I have a cousin of that name,
purple silk, reaching almost to the
one of the Departments at Washing ankles. nn«l closely fastened at the pavement. A dozen Newporters irn wrong side out, and is never so happy whom you greatly resemble.”
“No sir,” wbb the reply, “my name
ton. He died in Omaha, Neb., in neck by a massive silver arrow. mediately exclaimed, “How delight at dealing faro as when he finds tne
A TEST OF DRESSMAKING.
tow of his necktie has slipped under is not James. But. pardon me, is
1872 lor 1873, and after hie death ! Around her neck was a jionderons fully English.
A case came before the Brighton English authorities sent- messengers I collar, resembling that of a New-
Showing off: Two women were re his right ear. If it’s gotten under your name Zinc or Copper?”
“Zinc or Copper? No, ma'am,” said
County Court Judge Oct. 20th, which to this country to identify him by foundlanil dog, and from it,suspend cently seen pricing gingham in a hie left ear he givee the dealer’s box
the astonished man. “What led you
caused much amusement, and in certain well known marks on his ed by numerous chains, was an en shop. One remarked to the other on to Brownie.”
to suppose I had such names?”
which a dressmaker sought to re ¡tody. Gen. Ord was brought up, ' graved plate chased with gold grabe the label to the goods: “See the
WHIMS or PLATE RS.
“Excuse me,” was the quiet reply,
cover 13s for work done for a lady like his father, in the Catholic faith. j sques and set with cornelians, not un- American eagle and the motto E
“How about the players who buck
“but I thought certain you must Ire
named Taylor. The defendant re His widow and two children, son and < like the nrim and thummim of a pluribus tinum—that's the French for the game, are they cranky also?”
fused to pay, because the plaintiff daughter, are still in Washington, I Jewish high priest. On her wrists “In time of peace prepare for war.”
“Yes. There’s Cooley Bearer, for first cousin to a brass foundry.”
The man fell over two seats and
had spoiled her dress. Plaintiff, in stricken with grief at the sudden loss i were ponderous bracelets, set also
instance. I’ve known him to follow
an indignant tone, said: “I did make of husband and father. They had ' with flat cornelians. The breast and your flower-garden?” asked one an bld woman along the streets just kicked a bird-cage half way down
the dress properly; but the lady has been in Washington for some time i stomach of the shirt were so set over Somerville gentleman of another. to get the nib of her cigarette. This the car in his haste to get into the
no natural figure whatever. She awaiting the coming of Gen Ord, with closely hung llarge silver coins “Four <>-clocks,” was the reply; “no, he’d keep for several «lays in his smoker, while the voting lady smiled
a gentle smile lienind her handker
•as suffering with' her liver, and when they all intended going to i as to give her the appearance of
there is no four-o’clock about vest pocket, on the left side, and then chief. It was a proof of the old
could not be squeezed, and how could gether to some resort for the heated wearing a cuirass of silver scales. sir,
it is all day with my flowers;
I make her look like a Venus when it term. Gen Ord's eldest daughter, | On her head was a sacque of open mine;
he’d say the «jjgan tte brought g«x>d adage that a witty answer turneth
•as all wadding?” “Defendant—I it will be remembered, is the wife of I silver work, showing the red cloth the hens have been at ’em.
If he lost, then he’d say the away bores.—(Oil City Derrick.
Six lovely school ma’ms were out luck.
did not want you to make it tight: I Gen Trevino, of Mexico.—[Army and | beneath, and surmounted by a spike
must have been praying when
rowing on the placid Monongahela
like my dresses loose. Plaintiff—You Navy Journal.
A hungry countryman was ex
like that of a German soldier's helmet, last evening. A bold, wick«! man on she was smoking.
should say how very deformed your
“Then there was Lance hie hobby ploring one of the quiet lanes in the
j Her entire appearance in her silver shore, who was a bad boy a few years
arms are. Defendant (excitedly)—I
A country newspaper reporter vis I panoply was Minerva-like in the ex ago. instead of taking off liis hat as was that if he could touch a hump city for a dinner, when his ears were
am not deformed. I am a lietter ited Vassar College for the purpose | treme.
jierson upon the bump without saluted by a shrill voice from an eat
the Isiats went by, simply remarked, back
figure than you; I have no deformity. of getting the views of the young
the party knowing it be would tie ing house, which nth-red in rapid
Mv husband is in court; ask him. ladies on the tariff question. To the
fortunate and strike a bonanza. tones the following incomprehensive
“George Augustus Sala has broken
Plaintiff—Will you allow me to try very first one whom he encountered
"Send anything to this office in Last summer one <rf the Boston tour jargon: "Bi ledlaman-capersors—Roae
the dress on in court? Defendant— he opened the subject without any loose with a violent objection to payment for subscriptions, potatoes, ists bad a bump. He followed him lieefrosegoos- Rosemuttonantaters—
•public feeds, sitting for hours at a cord wood, string beans, rags, old t«j the old churches, curiosity shops Biledlamancablmgevege tables— Walk
i«*; before all the gentlemen. His circumlocution by remarking:
Honor—You must put the dress on.
“I suppose you girls go in for pro crowded tavern table, surrounded by iron, anything, only send it,” wails and other public places Hnd several insirtakasea sir.” The astonished
viands which you do not wish to eat, an impecunious country editor, and times was on the eve of stealthily man hastened his pace in order to
»od I must see it.
The parties then retired into the
“We did,” she said, with a low, and liquors which you do not wish then adds, “not necessarily for publi touching the hump, when the gentle find a house where they spoke Eng
•olicitors' robing room, and after the sweet gurgle, “bnt if they’re going to to drink.’ He’s quite right. Bull cation, bnt as a guarantee of good man would tnrnfaronnd. So persist lish.
plaintiff ha«i put on the dress bis increase the tax on chewing gum 1« f and water are not the things to faith.”
ent did Lance become that the gen
I have al out”
Honor was informed by a Bailiff that we're all free-traders.”
A violent church quarrel is being
“Does a goose lay eggs ?” inquired tieman reporte«! him to the police
dte refused to come into court. His
Rollo, one brisk morning in bnaz.y and the annoyance ended, much to pushed to completion in Cleveland.
Honor accordingly entered the
Oscar Wilde say» he "would ex A Los Angeles rancher has raise.) March. And Rollo's father, sitting Lance’s chagrin and mortification. It is thought that the work will lie
^bing room, and on his return into
a pumpkin so large that his two chil behind the stove, eating quinine He often said, ‘If 1 could have done I finished in time for a levival nn<!
cwtrt he said the work was very in clude from witnessing the perform- dren
use a half each for a cradle. with a spoon, and trying to shake his it, then it’s good bye to banks.’ bnt I love feast.—(Arkansaw Traveler. Oh,
differently done. He did not, there-i I bhw
™ tragedy any person who This tnay
I yes; they'll make it all up when they
seem very wonderful in the whole skeleton out of his pockets, be didn't do it
’ore think the nlaintiff had earned ¡would she«!
“Another favorite superstition some
to carry the dominie five dollars'
‘be money claimed, and the verdict I does not call forth tears. Tliat s rural districts, bnt in this city three made reply: “Yes. my son, ague players have is to bet high on certain | I go
worth of donation supper.—(Chicago
•ould lie’for the defendant.-!Lon- nghLOscars tragedy will probably or four fuli-grown policemen have slavs everything. It has slain your cards if certain things occur during a Telegram.
been found asleep on a single beat father.”
1)8 laQKhed «•