The Oregon register. (Lafayette, Yamhill County, Or.) 18??-1889, January 27, 1888, Image 3

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“T ■’-------------------- -------------------------
Csrl«ton round Tk«m .Soo Near
J<«w York.
« th« «olden tiro* when the thouxhe-
"° M,v. unto hii»*elf. Io, It i» hotter
/L wm iu town, end I will «wi*« «nd
bud to the mountain,; I will ley me
’“unuuid "it** » uiulwimmw night'*
’ br ibe bank of the laughing waters,
" trw* beloved by the *low stirring
r I trill vie* the coming of the chariot
tbnawh the gate* of pearl g*rl*nd«l
J ‘ . J wj;i listen to the choir of happy
'medniue of the waintenng bee, the
of the nestling* umter the eav«a, th*
of th* lootut aiid the deep throated
of the bullfrog in bi« «edgy lair; I will
. the «torni king build bis towers and
and battlements on high, burling cloud
at cloud and thunderbolt against thun-
)|t till his wrath is appeased, and then to
agU l>e blown the sweetness and the cool-»
Wet fields, and through the long and
uorous purple hour shall come twilight
the peace of bim who liveth well; and
irtlw solemn dome of dusk, under the
‘jyes of the stars, under the broad
*of the risfhg moon shaJl I float down
irer of rest to an infinite calm.
.is it the city man’s dream of a country
en but I have not found it. t
oJri the trees belayed fey the slow «t<r-
|Hit I foud<l* too, that a largg
«of painftll ants had go’ there before
adim^ disposed to quarrel with intru-
I hive wnteheil ¿he coming of the
ot of day through the gates of pearl, and
jeedthe thermometer throw one legover
ifehtiedi rung, and then reach up and
himself up to the ninetieth before the
nt I mu I got fairly going. I have learned
we the drone of the wandering bee at
puse distances, having discovered that
pampered insect considers it quite a joke
rniard a slumbering stranger without
areaeen an abundance of fresh vegeta
in rural districts and miles of orchard
ng under IBe^wealth ' df pippin And
r, but the frugal and far seeing farmer
I'irtgaged theerttire lot, and the stranger
»content himself with a snuffle for yel-
ras just picked from a Baltimore can,
«things Eave made me sad. It seems
the honest granger should have nobler
itions than to paint his house yellow,
rnblue and his well box green, insert a
line advertisement in the- Sunday papers
me unsuspectiug citizens against bis
beef and malaria in the guise of health
iDomy. It seems tome somewhat un-
,ble for a man to-seek so far and fare
Ijr when he could just as well enjoy
and «kimmed milk, his insomnia and
ity without leaving the city.
tbe fact is every man bred in a city
rs himself swindled unless be has two
of mumner on a farm, just as the
thinks life not Worth living without
ual lour through tbe joys of the Bow­
winter. It is-an outbreak of inward
ness, like the hives, and every man gets
»whole pharmacopoeia can furnish j « o
jr, and the only relief is to go ana pur-
le wayward fancy ahd_come home lull
bum, colic and repentance. _4
to the country, you toilers seeking for
iut let it be country indeed, with no
ing Of town. Seek your balm from sky
leld, from sea and hill, from leaf and
tn and bird, and you will get it for tbe
Let the sun brown the cheek and
of your daughters.
Let your boys
’ through the tangle of woods, wild as
bipmunk they chase. Get as far as
can carry you from the city and its
, from tbe crowd and its tiresome
; be a child of nature, a worshiper of
ss and sunshine—-there is the sovereign
gyouseok, and you will seek it in the
rings of fashion in vain.—N. Y. World.
An Explanation*
hat are you doing up there?”
^nly hanging up pears that
«Hen down.—Fliegende Blaetter.
Interesting paragmpn
' ’ , in 'h® notebook of a recently
*" operatic manager: “In’ all my
.ran experience I never knew a
■onna to be sick or have a cold on
‘i she was to have a henpat “
—Oscar Wilde has 'become editor «of
the Lady'i World at London.
—Gath's salary from the Cincinnati
Enquirer is two hundred dollar* per
—The Ve^as. the sacred books of
the Bramlnic religion, are believed to
be 3,900 years old. that is, to date
back a* far as 2.000 B.C.
—Miss Minnie E. Folsom, a near
relative of Mrs. GroYeq^Clevelaud. has
become preceptress of the Brookings
Agricultural College in Dakota.
—Sarah Marshal, who died recently
at Philadelphia, leaves her fortune,
which is estimatod^at'from (330,000 to
(400,000, for the relief of chronic anil
incurable invalid* who can not bo cared
for by the general hospitals. — Christian
—The Baroness Burdett-Coutts is
greatly interested in Irish charities. It
is qwing to her generosity that the
now flourishing fishing viliage ln Weft
Cork, oalled Baltimore, was sit on its
—Mrs. Henn is sb thorough a sailor
and so fond of the Galatea as her home
that she has been ashore but four times
since April Her diversions are fish­
ing and training a pet raccoon which
she caught in Florida.
—Mrs. Ole Bull recently conducted
a party of young people through the
White Mountains. They traveled en­
tirely in buebboards, carrying their
baggage with them, and had all the
fun there was going.— Detroit Free
—Dr. Mackenzie, the English sur­
geon who operated on the German
CroWn Prince’s throat, places a royal
estimatB_jjpp.n tho va)ue.of_his services. .
He charged thirteen thousand dollars
for making two trips to Germany and
treating his patient in London for a
few days.
—Charles Painter, who fiied in Ar­
lington, Md., recently, agod seventy
years, was noted as the man who in­
troduced ice-cream Into Maryland.
When a young man he movod with a
brother from their native Pennsylvahia
to Carroll County, and soon after they
made a small quantity of ice-cream,
the first seen in this section," and dis­ '
tributed it among their acquaintances.
As the tasto for it spread, the brothers
went extensively into the business, un­
til fluidly their names became house-
hold worc^,
—That w'hich many writers are will­
ing to believe is their strength is in
truth their weakness. That writer of
English is always weak who seeks to
express in far-reached and high-sound­
ing Latluisms thoughts that can be
equally well (and therefore better) ex­
pressed in the simpler Saxon. These
are the writers tfho go fishing with the
pin hook of intellectual childhood in
the pool of the practically obsolete for
sonorous words, when the idea they
wish to convey were much more easily
understood if clothed in simple phrase.
—Detroit Free Press.
—An exchange says: “Does eti­
quette demand a vest on a hot day?”
if it does, it can have ours.— Norris­
town Herald.
—A sure rule on the gum matter is
this: If tho mouth is kept. open, or
opens every other chaw it is gum. If
kept closed it is caramela
—Amy (appearing on the piazza
with some lemons)—“Ada, have you
got a squeezer?” Ada—"Only Gita,
and I can't spare him."— Town Topics.
—Wife—“I found a ring on the
street to-day. It is engraved ‘F. to M.'
1 wonder what that means?” Husband
(who is a speculator)—“Fair to medi-
ujp, I supposo."— Chicago Mail
—Sometimes the benefit to a girl’s
health resulting from a month's vaca­
tion in the oountry has been wholly
qounteracted by one simple experi­
ment at milking a mild-eyed cow
-LA Cincinnati milkman who was
arrested for reducing his milk one-
third is highly indignant He had
been in the habit of putting in half wa­
ter. but troubled by conscience, he had
reduoed the quantity of water as stated.
—Detroit Free Press.
—Physician (to anxious wife)—“We
have held a consultation, madam, about
your husband's case;, he is a very sick
man. and it might be well to send for
a minister, I think.” Anxious Wife—
“Will one bo enough, doctor, or would
you advise a consultation of ministers?”
—Omaha Bride—“My dear, I wish
yon would bring home one of those
boxes of French bon-bons to-night”
Husband—“Wha—” "And after tea
it will be real pleasant to go out and
get some ice cream —” “Great Stars
and Stripes! Why, we’re married.”—
Omaha World
—Electric whistles, very melodious
In sound, anil said to be leas exjienslve
in manufacture than electric bells, are
lining favorably received in Irani».
The whistle is made by fitting a small
brass tube with suitable apertures so
that it opens against the spring of a
suitably-formed commuter, or circuit
“make-and-broak.”— Arkansaw Trav-
lUallaMe Works of Art Produce«!
Crowd of Arkansaw Llarw
by a
—The person who hold* apite muM
believe in a queer God.
—The present membership of the
Unive-salist denomination in the
Unite !*6tatos is only thirty-aix thou­
sand iwo hundred and uiuety-seven.
—There are in China eight hundred
and eighty missionaries, of whom four
hundred and fifty-eight are women
and four hundred and thirty-one men.
—A teacher having asked his class
to write np essay on “The Results of
Laziness,” a eFl tain bright youth hand­
' in as his composition a blank sheet
' paper.— Actualities.
—The teaching of cooking has been
introduced in Public School 15, New
York. After the dishes cooked shall
have passed examination they will be
sent to the Newsboys’ Home.
—A lady has left £50 apiece to six
curates of th« Church of England who
have four children and whose inqpmes
< do not exceed £100 a year. The ex­
ecutors have been given twelve months
to choose the legatees.
—The Board of Education figures up
that it will^need for the maintenance
of the schools of New York City next
year (4,284,262, besides (256,000 ft>r
new sites and (895,000 for new build­
ings or a total sum of (5,385,262.
—Consul-General Cardwell, of Cairo,
Egypt in a report to the Department
of State, cnll* special atteulion to the
successful labors of American mission­
aries in the valley of the Nile. Nearly
6,000 native pupils are in attendance
at the schools that have been estab-
—There is such a thing m talking
away all' sense of feeling, and the
talker, amid his expressions of abject
Borrow for past sins, is in truth grati­
fying iiis vanity by making himself the
hero of his foul story. The outstand­
ingly wicked man. whon reclaimed by.
God's mercy, ought to walk softly and
spoak mildly.— Bishop Fallows.
—One of our exchanges Bays that
when Mr. Moody was in ^London a
number of young men w'erfe commis­
sioned to follow up the converts to see
that they remained true to their pro­
fessions. They did bo . Two of the '
committee were at the Bible-scJiool and
said thoy got tho names of forty-five
thousand converts made tn London.—
Indianapolis Journal.
—A4 a meeting in -Philadelphia of
the missionary council of the Protestant
Episcopal Chiireh reports showed re­
ceipt* as follows: Legacies, (29.170.-
42; othorsources, (285,794.96; special*,
(69,778.19; enrattnrent fund. (17,696;-
95: total, (402,440,52. a decrease of
(17,828.45. The contributing congre­
gations numbered 2.200, against 2,876
last year.— Public Opinion.
—The Roman Catholic Church ha*
forty-five IndialTMJhools scattered over
the country from Florida to Alaska.
Dakota has the lion’» share, »here be­
ing fourteen in that Territory. New
Mexico has eleven, Minnesota seven,
Wisconsin five, Alaska two and Col­
orado, California, Nevada, Oregon,
"Kansas and Florida one each. Of these
‘ schools thirty-five supply board and
clothing as well as instruction. The
aggregate attendance is nearly 4,000.
Most of the teachers are German and
French. — Indianapolis Journal
Several men were sitting in a store
at Jameson's Urn-yard talking of the
pictures which they had seen in tho
“art’’ gallery of a county fair.
“Yea looked putty well,” said an
old fellow, "but they ain’t what I call
ling paintin'. Boys, you know’d Andy
“Wall, Andy was a painter. One
day he paiuted the .pictur’ of an over­
coat, an’ it was so nachul that his
daddy put it on an' had wore it some
time before he Iouud out it was a
•-Yes,” rejoined a fellow names I
Smith. "I have heard of that pictur’.
Andy was a putty good cub painter,
thar ain't no mistake about that, but
when you want to get some right good
work done you've got to go to a feller
that has l'arned the trnde sho nuff.
Now. Miles Stokes was what I call a
number one painter. Yob all know’d
Miles—lived on the old Astord place
the year after the war. One time
Miles painted the pictur’ of a Addle,
an’ I'll be banged if a fe ler didn't take
it to a dance an' play on It all night.
Never heard sioh music In my life.
Made it'far’ly talk, the feller did. That
was one paintin' sho nuff.
“That was a mighty fine pictur’,"
said old Gates.
"Miles could have
done suthin at paintin’ ef he had kept
on tryinV but he peered to lose his grip
airter Bob Hadley come around. Had­
ley was a fine painter.
Of course. I
ain’t no art"critic, nor nothin' of that
sort, and don't pretend to put my
judgment up any higher than you can.
reach, but somehow he always struck'
un: as bein’-a.paw'ful nachul painter.
One night thar wits a possul of u over
at old Simmons’ house an we got atter
Bob to paint us a pictur'.
He said he
didn’t feel like paintin’ an’ kep’ on
snakin’ excuses till old Simmons went
out and fetohed in a bucket of paint an'
a bresh an’ told Bob that he jest must
paint some sort of pictur’, whuthcr or
no. . Wall, Bob he tuck up the bresh
pn’ begun ter slash it aroun' till the
fust thing we know’d ho had tlun
painted the pictur’ of a Jug. It wuz
jest as nachul as any Jug I ever seod;
an’ when I tuck it up and sorter shuck
it I hearn suthin’ slosh. I turned it tip,
I did, an' hanged ef thar wan’t whisky
¡a Ito” —
“Sho nuffwhisky?”
“Tell you hby *ho’ 'nuff it was. We
let in to drinkin’ it, an’ it wa'n’t long
till we woe all drunk.”
“It’* ywré’fímc¡ rrów, TTñcIe’'Bu'ckT'r
cried a young follow, slapping an old
man on tho back.
“I ain’t no han' to exaggerate,
boyij,” Uncle Buck replied. “To mo
thar ain't no fun in a impossible lie.”
“Thon what you air goin’ to tell us
is the truth, eh?”
“Yes, an' TU bet my boss agin
“Well, wait till I’ve heard yonr
“AU right,” Unole Buck continued,
“I was in Bill Rickey’s »tore some
time ago. Bill, yefu know, while he
don't make no pretense, is consider­
able of an artist Wall, jest to amuse
moor himself, he painted a nigger, an’
the nigger went out-doors, chopped
some wood, brought it into the house
an’ made as gpod a fire as you ever
rieaal to the North.
Tho superstition that human beings
“Uncle Bnck, I’ll take the bet"
“All right Yander’s John Higgins should sleep with their boads to the
North is bolieved by thoFrench to have
outyander. Call him in.”
Whon Higgins came in Uncle Buck for its foundation a soiontifie fact.
asked: “ Higgins, wa’n’t you at Rick­ They affirm that each human system
is in itself an electric battery. the head
ey’s store one day last week? ” \
’ being one of the electrodes, tho feet
tho othor. Tboir proof was discovered
• “ Seed me thar? ’’
f-om experiments which the Academy
of Soionces was allowed to make on
“Anybody else thar?”
the body of a man who was guillotined.
“Yes. a nigger.”
This was taken tho Instant it fill and
“ What did Rickey do to him?"
.placed Upon a pivot free to move as It
“Snatched up a bresh and painted, knight Tho head part, after a little
him, jest fur fun. ”
vacillation, turned to tho north and
“What did the nigger do shortly the body then remained stationary.
It wag turned half way round by one
“Chopped some wood an’ made a of the protestors, and again the hood
end of the trunk moved slowly to the
“Gabe," »aid Uncle Buck,
cardinal point due North, the snmo
fetch that horse round here.”
results being repeated until tho final
“ Oh, no, you said ha painted the arrostatioh of organio movement.—
pictur of a nigger.”
“No, I didn’t; did I boys?”
“No, said he painted a nigger,"
—At a recent seanoo m Rochester,
some one replied, and the boys agreed N. Y., by a medium from Brooklyn,
that those were his exact words.
several written communications, pur­
“That’s the only boss I've got. Un­ porting to come from the spirit world,
cle Buck.”
were handed out from the cabinet.
“Kain’t he’p it; fetch him."
Six of the notes in which the cbirogra-
Gabe brought the horse around and pt/V seemed to be the most dissimilar
Uncle Buck led him away.— Arkansaw were submitted to experts in the mat­
ter of handwriting.
Both of the ex­
<1 • —
—me lowa State University has re­ perts agreed that not more than two
cently acquired a fine specimen of the persons wrote the notes, and one
extinct musk ox of North America. of them was inclined to think that all
The bones, which are remarkably well were written by tho same hand.
preserved, were unearthed near the l>encil-drnwing, purporting to be a por­
Missouri.river at Couuifl Bhiffh ia the trait of J-an Ingelow, represented her
formation known to geologists as the 'Mfatnan.
loess. This creature, like the modern
—mr». Dr. Ki'nSTaii American lady. Is
musk ox. is supposed to hare been physician to the Queen of Corea. She
clothed with a long fleece, and the dis­ has apartments in the royal palaco-at
covery of the remains at Council Bluffs Seoul, and receives a yearly salary
indicates that a low temperature must which is equal to eighteen thousand
have prevailed in that region duringthS dollars. She is expected to visit the
period when the loess wks accumulat­ Queen daily and remains in call when
ing. so that Arctic animals have found her Majesty is indisposed.
the climate comfortable there-
—Senator Blackburn, of Keetuoky,
Is said to have the moat musical voice
in CougreaA
—It is said that Henry M. Stanley
has been offered (60,000 for a book de­
scribing his latest travel* when he
reach*« home.—Conyreputiomslug.
—William Hostetter, of Hendricks
County. Ind., is a descendent of
General Warren, the hero of Bunker
Hill, and has in hi* possession the mili­
tary coat worn by Geuend Warren
when he fell pierced by a British bullet.
The garmont is in a fair state of pres­
ervation, but has lost all it* buttons
sure one.
—The wife of the King of Holland
hoe a bail trick of winking her eyes.
The oourtiers do not know whioh way
to look when the pretty Queen wink* at
them, and some very sad blunder* fre­
quently occur, owing to this physical
defect. A young attache of the Belgian
Minister who returned the Queen’s
wink found himself ¿•returned with
thanks" to his native l(nd,by th* next
mail, and ainoe then none of the Hol­
landers has dared to sauce back.
—Ex-Comptroller John J. Knox has
received from a friend an interesting
relic In th* shape of a protested note Of
Robert Morris, the financial backer of
tip^Upion in it* war for independence,
pjrabil to the protested note is the
ariginal note for (5,000. The signa­
ture is in a bold hand. The date is
1795. It is well known that Mr. Mor­
sis, after raising (1,400,000 on his
credit for the Revolutionary army, and
doclining tho Treasury portfolio in
favor of Robort Hamilton, met with
reverses and died a poor man.
,-John Radcliffe, the well-known
English flutist, was recently visiting a
country town, where ho met a quaint
old woman who was gazing intently at
a cheap print representing the Virgin,
with St. Elizabeth on the one hand and
St. Joseph on the other, anil the in­
scription “Ave Mama” underneath.
“Of course, you understand that?”"
asked. Radcliffe, seeing the old lady
appeared puzzled. “O, yes,” -was the
reply, "I know all about that. The
man ¡is axing the 'ooman in the middle
will he ’ave her, and she i^ieaying a*
how, bein’ married 'orsidt, she can’t,
but won't he ’ave Maria.” "
—The London Athenwum says: It
miuit be. jet. down, to tho credit of .
Americans, when English authors in­
veigh against thoir oopyright arrange­
ments, that it has before now hap­
pened that a future great author has
received encouragement _ from the.
Other side of the Atlantio at a time
when he was seeking it here in vain.
The Americans were very early in
recognizing the genius of Thackeray,
and they showed their appreciation of
his work by publishing collected
editions of his miscellanies before any-
'xaly in this conntry had considered
-td! a collection worth making. Nay,
afore than this, some of Thackeray’s
aarly papers were published, and it
«ay be prosnmod paid for, in America
before they appeared in England.
—An earnest falsehood will do mor*
than a coward truth. — Biohop Walker.
—Do all the good you can in th*
world, and make as little noise about
it as possible.
—Within the last five months Har­
vard College has reooived gifts amount­
ing in (3,000,000.
—Live near to God, apd so all thing*
will appear to you little in comparison
with eternal realities— R. M. M'Cheyne.
—The first Christian Church in the
Congo Free State was organized in No­
vember of lost year, and there are now
1.002 converts in the Comro Mi siofi.'
To Regulate
| H F
warranted not to contain a (ingle par-
tide of Mercury or any injurious sub-
Kance, but is purely vegetable.
It will Cure all Diseases caused
by Bmrangement of the Liver,
Kidneys and Stomach.
If your Over is out of order, then your
whole system is deranged. The blood is
impure, the breath offensive; you have
beadacne, feel languid, dispirited and
nervous. To prevent a more serious con­
dition, take at once Simmons
I l V k H
REGULATOR. If you lead a
sedentary life, or suffer with
Affections, avoid
stimulants and take Simmons Liver Regulator.
Sure to relieve.
If you have eaten anything hard of
digestion, or feel heavy after meals or
sleepless at rJght, take a dose and you
will fed relieved and sleep pleasantly.
If you art a miserable sufferer with
Biliousness, seek relief at once in
Simmons Liver Regulator. It does not
require continual dosing, and costs but a
trifle. It wiM cure you.
If you wake up in the morning with a
bitter, bad taste in your mouth,
Ifl A TT11
| A K k
Simmons Liver Regulator. It cor-
recti the Bilious Stomach, sweetens
the Breath, and cleanses tke Furred
l ongue. Children often need some safe Cathar­
tic and Tonic to avert approaching sickness.
Simmons Liver Regulator will relieve Colic, Head­
ache, Sick Stomach Indigestion, Dysenteiy, and
the Complaints incident to Childhood.
At any time you feel your system needs
cleansing, toning, regulating withont violent
pu>?lng, or stimulating without intoxi­
cating, take
Simmons Liver Regulator.
’ PRseansD by
J. H. ZEILIHI CO., Philadelphia, Pa.
------- 1'BICK, «1.00.