The Oregon register. (Lafayette, Yamhill County, Or.) 18??-1889, December 30, 1887, Image 6

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1 Me Tails a Highly Moral Fairy Story ta
„ His adnurlsg Yous Vrteuds.
Vhell. shildren. may pe you like to
hear me talk some more? I vhas oanly
an oidt Dutchmans, but if 1 do you
some goot dot vhas all right. I guess
I tell you aboudt some badt boy—a
feller who vat named Shacob Hornber­
ger. and who Ilf py dot Black Forest in
A aiory That Dnabla Dlaeoaata Bldar Shermany. Vhas I tell you happened
so long ago dot my great grandfather
T-------- '■-----
H»> sa rd'- »rm l Bvtlawa.
Ilie great demand at present for in> .vhas a leedle poy. I hat w n i p e op le s
probn file stories leads to the belief tell me it vhasa fairy story, but,! doan’
that the following yarn -will be very know. Vhell now to pegin :
... Vqnce upon some time a poy named
i Shacob Hornberger lif by der Black
It was night.
A horseman slowly wound his way Forest mit his parent* Dot poy doan*
A' at a mail gallop up the hill,road which lie und stheal, but he vhas cruel in hie
mindL If he sees some odder leedle
led to Cookport.
A ride of three or four miles brings poy he likes to hit him mit a club, und
him to his destination in two minutes if be sees some leedle girl be likes, to
pinch ner und make her yell so loud as
aad a halt
He stope before a humble vine-clad a cannon. Dot vhas a pad preenciples,
cottage, the palatial marble residence shildren. If you doan' have some
mercy und sympathy for odder people
of Miss Agatha Hungerford Snipps.
Agatha is the only daughter of her you vhill some day sthand oop on der
parents, who manage tos live sumptu­ gallows to be hung.
Vhell, to proceed some more, dot poy
ously in hard-working retirement on
Shacob vhas tiekled all oafer when he
aa income of fifty dollars per year.
Mr. and Mrs. Snipps are both dead. haf some shanee to be cruel mit a dumb
Although Agatha is an orphan, she brute. It vhas Ids delight to throw
has been reared to know no want stones at some dogs; hunt down cats,
Her education was d finished one—fin­ und kill off der innocent birds. If he
ished this very year, in fact; and, in­ doan’be cruel to Bometliing duriugder
credible as ft may seem, she not only day he doan'shleepgoot at night. Lots
knew as much when site left college as of peoples talk to him und gill' him goot'
when she entered it. but she had actu­ advice, but Shacob vhas no petter.
ally learned something.
Vhen a poy’doan' heed der words of
She had learned tliat it is not proper his parents Und friends it riias bad for
to ask for a second plate of soup un­ him—werry badL He vitas on der
less she is very, very hungTy.
plank roadt to destruction, und be dies
“Agatha,” said Mrs. 8nipps. “whois some awful death.
that woman alighting at the gale?"
| * Vhell, oae-day Shacob finds a rabbit
a/rh:tt woman.” observed Mr.Snipps. mit two proken legs, und he vhas nefer,
A. .
without giving Agatha time to reply, so tickled pefore. It vhas a oliance to
“is Mr. Montgomery Digby Jones, and pe cruel, und he takes oudt his knife to
be has come to see our Agatha. He torture dot poor rabbit. A leetie olill
loves her. but be doos not like to pro- man mit a hump on his pack und one
posa. knowing she is the heiress of white eyebrow comes oujlLul
all these vast estates. He hesitates of •bus den und savs:
incumber himself with so much prop­
‘Vhas you do, eli; Xhacob? Yon
erty, as well as with a wife. But. doan' be cruel to dot poor rabbit, I
Agatha,” turning to the girl, “treat hope?”
him wslL Ho will make a good son-
"I Hke to skin him alife!" says
‘The old folks withdrew as Mr.
•But if you touch him you shall be
Jones rang the belt. H.> was soon punished. *\
ushered into tbe parlor where sat the
Uiiil now, shildren, vhas you suppose
blooming Agatha, a tall, willowy girl dot poy did? He jabs dot knife into dot
of fonr feet high and weighing two rabbit's eye- und laughs h>! ba! ha! to
hundred and seventy-two pounds ten hear him cry oudt midt pain. Howefer,
Inrhadt no sooner done dot dan der old
Agatha and D gby were engaged, man makes two signs like dot und says:
allbough the girl’s parent’s knew it
“I turn dot .puy Into a lean, plind
wolf, und I bid him go off mit der Black
They had been betrothed for two Forest? Dot rabbit vhas all right again!"
Und. shildren, shust like you lif, Sha­
■Evenin’," said Digby, as he stepped
cob pecomes a plind wolf, mit all his
within the doorway.
ribs plain to be seen, und dot rabbit
"Howdy,” replied Agatha.
goes scampering off on four legs, mil
She kept her seat by the window
Ids eyes as goot as eafer. Dot wolf
while Digby seated himself across the
howls mit hunger und pain, und vhile
room by the door.
he runs he knocks himself oafer lots of
After some desultory conversation
timevund vbas padly used oop. If he
Digby remarked:
can't see he can't catch something to
"Agatha. I hear that tbev have
eat. und in a little time be goes deadv
some excdlent ice cream at Brown's
If you see some rabbit, shildren. you
«xvnfectionery, Let Os go and get
vhill notice how crooked his hiudt legs
vhas. Dot vhas because dty vhas pro­
“N<\" replied Agatha, “I never
ken. You notice some spect in his
cal ice cream.”—
eyes. J>ot vhas pecause be vhas cured
—Tin ostrica tea:Bera which were so quetkof his blindness. Dot vhas my
•old during March at Port Elizabeth ' story: IlSedle ones, und I like yon to ro-
in South Africa. realised £76 744.
1 member it Der poy who likes to gif
—Some Dartmouth boys ’most too ' pain to some helpless animal vhill eonie
•mart to live! surprised President i oop to some bail! man. It vhas putter
Bartlett at the senior rhetorical exer- dot our hearts vhas always full of pitty
’ vises in the chapel the other day when and mercy, und dot we vhas always
all the college students were assem­ ready rait charity for der uufuriunale.
bled, with a jackass, which they had I — Detroit Free Preet.
hitches! to the pulpit. When President
Bartlett came to the platform, he re­
The Aspect sf Troop« at ft« OSA sun l>«n-
marked: “I perceive some of you have
las a sasgstasry C—«S hv .
lost your brother;" and then ordered | The aspect of troops of all arms of
the exercises to proceed, during which ■
' the service is very different in battle
the donkey remained the guest of the
from the trim and neat parade appear­
ance, but nowhere is this difference so
—Our highest thoughts do not reach marked as in the artillery. Il was al­
what will be the level of our happi­ ways most interesting to me to watch
ness hereafter. At first our everlast­ a battery going into action. Tbe artil­
ing life will be like a summer's day. so lerymen were very careful at all times
calm and- beautiful and long. But it to be dres-ed strictly in awxirdanoe
will prove a day that will last on and with regulations, and when a battery
on and on. And when no night comes, took position every caa none—r looked
and when we do not weary, and all as if be had just prepared himaelf for
things keep brightening about us. as inspection. Nothing coolu be ureter
the eyes of our understanding open— and more uniform than their spjiew-
then, little by little, we shall begin, in ance. But this did •« last long. As
•we and woudcr. to feel what it is to ba the fine began to get hot a jacket here
anal there would be thrown off: next
—An Obliging Guest.—A resident of the collar, would go. "and sdtoa the
the provinces had come to pass a few shirts. Tbe men were wo: bathed in
days with some relatives in Paris. Be­ perspiration, which they would hastily
coming infatuated with the gay cap«- brush __________
off with their powfer-biacareed
taL be remained until patience on the ¿an<ikTearing 'great'"mark» 'w^vrer
part of his hosts ceased to be a virtu* lheT l(,.ebed themw-brm. Wtam the
Too polite to openly remonstrate, they , nirn
to fall and wrev em
threw oat a hint: “Don't you think, •
my dear fellow." they said to the bore.
polder marks.
• that your wife and children most the close of the fight tbe nrtiUet
miss yon?
"No doubt. Thanks fot
■ -
the suggestion. I’ll send for them”— Bt ib
rtnuAsasD tvuj fbiday
1 ,,T"
—Accòcding to Dr. Lucien Howe Bui
who read a paper on the increase of fray,
blindness in the United 8tates as the
last meeting of the American Associa- *> A «■ A fxnus Oycr-Zhmocrat.
tino for the Advancement of Science,
the population of this country increased . — -Wh^t i. that big iron th™
' af boles*” asked laara. -Lacon
thirty per cent, from 1*70 to ISSO, aad
Loiler." said Toau Laura touted
blindness increased during the
IbonghtfuL After a moment i
period lortv per cent, until n
' the asked: "Why do they beO
have with ns ».000 bfind. Cos
I lires?"
aad immigration are act down as
• Of the 400,0)0 Hebrews oompv
in the United States, at Issst
settled in New York. Among
many millionaires. A Now Y
The nasal cavities are everywhere 1 recently published a list of nln
30 lined with usucoos membrane, in which brews in that city whoas fortu
from »I3XMJ.UO0 up to »«.otAOui; •
30 terminate various nerves. To increase
>»• 30 the surface of sensitiva membrane, the
walla of the cavities are not regular,
11« 30
14 « 10 but two thin bones, oovered with mem­
1U brane and nerves, swell out from the
th 30 sides, almost filling the cavities. These
0 are called the "turbinated bones,”
.0 from their top-like shape. The nerves
,s— all are m ai nly in t he upper P*** g<
of the basal cavities, where they di­
tadatnuAiig I
rectly connect with tbe “olfactory
tract” of the brain. -
Tbe nerves over the lower turbinated
■t edition of a medi
booe are jpbolly devoid of the sense of
any eotuttn. The
| ru—**■ but when unduly sensitive, give
oust A Co.. Hltebu
4 s» rise to various troublesome ailments— on receipt of a two cent stamp, wUf
« S»
« « hay fever. fiU of sneezing, asthma
mam When thus sensitive and producing
lutein then eCeete. the membrane is found to
It is estimated that since UM, <
men have been killed in wars.
1 fl be thsekeued from chronic congestion
1 17» of the part Tbe olood-supply to the “Oh, wad some power the gittie git
To see ourselves as ithere see us” I
w rier is excessive. In some persons
Few women want to appear sic?
tbe sneezing is violent, frequent, and
yet how many we see with pain v
conuauoos for many months. Some­ on every feature, who have been su
times the fits of sneezing give place to tor months from female weaknes
who could easily cure themselves
attacks of asthma.
use of Dr. Pierce’s "Favorite Pr
Shorts, V ton ...................
Hack, of Germany, is a strong advo­ tion,” to be found at any drug store
Hay, F ton, baled........
cate for the use of the galrano-csutery remedy is a speclflc for weak back
Chop, g ton.......................
in all such, and many allied, cases. vous 01'neuralgie pains, and all thi
Oil cake meal P ton.........
of diseases known as * fe nale compl
F bbsh Favmt
Dr. De Haviland Hal), of England, Illustrated, large treatise ou dlsee
Apples, Oregon, f box...
while thinking that too much is women, with most successful cou
Cherries, Oregon, pdrm.
S 00 daiii^pd for this remedy, nays “that self-treatment, sent for 10 cents in s
Lemoaa, California, F bx
1 ao there are certain neurotic affections, Address, World's Dispensary Medi
Limes, F 100....
sosiatlon, 063 Main Street, Buffalo,
oranges. ? box
Riverside oram.-
tbe starting-point of which is the
Loa Angeles, do
What is done' cannot be undoi
1 00 « 1 30 mucous nasal membrane, can not,
Peechea, F box .
. I think, be denied, and in these peclally if it is a hard boiled egg.
Dry, over 10 lbs. F lb...
easesq ure can be most readily effected
A'et salted, over 15 tbs.
by treatment directed to this part.
7 M
Murrain hides..............
West 87th St, N.Y.. June U
10 • 1 33 1 Hack, by |M>int'ng out that tho most
Pelts....... . ...................
- - I have been a martyr to bilious-
ache and dj spepsia. Any indlscrv^
I 00
Cabbage, F th...............
> lion of the mucous membrane of the diet, over-fatigue or cold brings on
Carrots. F **a«k............
Cauliflower, • dos..,..
so • V I galmno-eautery, has enabled us to indigestion, to be followed by a he
Onions ..........................
lasting two or three days at a t
Potatoes, new, F bush
treat successfuHy and promptly many think I mu-t have tried over twen
14 «
W ool —
ent remedies, whi> h were recomt
cult to. manage.”
by loving friends,
n.— —
’ Like tbe Irishmsi
At last 1 tho
amex-'^oroer Philosophy.
vious application of cocaine to the mem­ would take a simple course of pn
ill * For tl
Somebody has said: “When you see brane, renters the operation wholly, or-
week I took two Pills every nigh
a man look at his watch and put if back nearly, painless. Dr. Hall says, how­ one Pill for thirty nights; in that 1
into bis pocket, ask him the time, and ever, that many. cases can be as gained three pounds In weight, and
in nine eases out of ten he can not tell effectually cured by more simple nave had an ache or a pain sine-.
W illiam E. R ocks
you until he has looked again.’" That measures, and he would always have
is a fact I hare experimented with these tried first.— Youth'e Companion.
several men on the street lately—al
Lewis Con-ty Bee, October 14, IM
the noon hour. too. when every body
The “Old Reliable” manufaetui
Palmer & Key, is an ideal Job pres*
is looking ’at his watch, if he has one—
A b Katiwordlaary laeldBak or th« !>«•- the strongest and moat durable
and in every ease the nun who had
porato rieht at Warram.
tbe market. There ia a lever at
just been looking hurriedly at his time­
A singular incident of the battle of of the feeder connected with a <
piece. when asked the time, had tc Wagram, between the French and the device for throwing off the Inipre
look at it again before he could give Austrians, is related by Captain Blaze, will print a form to the full c«|
the chase, and all the part« a
answer. And did you ever notice how of tbe French Imperial Guard. He says strong
and durable to endure the
the man who isalwaysin a hurry look: j
that beside bring a great contest of dbus strain. Thia press for situ
excels all others
at his watch on tbe least occasion, ot arms, the day was a great hare-hunt
Yours truly,
without any occasdt.n at all? For ex­ There were 400,000 hunters, half Aus­
J. T. Foi
ample. you aad be are having a conver­ trians and half French. The plain was
? ’
How to Osin Flesh and Strength
sation. and he will udorn you that to­
simply covered with hares, which the
Use a ter each meal ttoott’s Kar
morrow he win »eave town for the East
longt«dvance of the two- armies had with llxpophosphiles. It Is as pdsl
or somewhere else. and. while dmng
and easily digested. Tbe rapid
gathered into the narrow space. Every milk,
which delicate people improve with ill
•a, nfipnlsively takes out his watch,
ten steps we started up one of these wonderful. Use it and try your weight
apparently to see if to-morrow is near
for Conauniption, Throat atfectl
animals. Frightened by our guns, remedy
Broncnitia it ia unequaled. - Please rs
at hand or if he hue time to wait for it
they ran tor Iheir lives, and continued used 8oott's Emulsion in • child eight
to arrive. With many persons the art
with good results. He gained four
to run until they reached the Austrian old
in a very short time
Tlio. ihus, j
of taking luH the wuteh is ruore a mat­
naes. There they were none the less Alabama.
ter of uneliwnnoue impulse or faabt
terrified, and came rushing back upon
Gen. Grant’s widow vistta the tl
than of On ¡literate luwuuou. — u’iuoa/s
us. Tbe soldiers were greatly amused Riverside Park every Sunday.
---------- »———-------
by the frantic movements of the hares,
U n equal led—Dr. Sage’s Catarrh Bl
and could hardly be restrained from
—Ma-yiaiul Darier—-firnr <Ty bree’ making after them.
Good as gold silver.
How many melon* yon nueecl this year?
Finally there was a great Austrian
Gardener—Aliotti BOG. 1 gnesa, Pean. rar airy charge, which, of course, took
U sttazias rangions literatura raul Irta at
How many have you ramee1 Darky— no account of the hares. Tbe horses UouteMlisE F uarlaon P.O. Drawer«.Fg
Forty-two. anti {.aside:—uber ye fence! plun^d in among them, and they
ferioyut Fret Jtmu.
rssited in dismay among the ranks of
the French soMiers. who, confused by
oo strange an attack, organ baroneting
the bares. Other soldiers, not imiue-
diatriv pressed by the onset of the
eaemy. caught up the trembling ani-
-with the
vcalv ia their hands. There was that
day a great slaughter of men and pf
Larv*. and many a shot destined for the
enemy struck one of these poor animals,
who doubtless believed that both the
great armies had come there expressly
to bant them, the hares, instead of to
Lai earn other. — IkzuIA's Companion.
Haw ta«v are CaasaU aa« Haw Tkay May
•a Fiwaatan aaU tiara«.
M« m
n You Would Be Happy.
Iw» your temper.
Gaia a little knowledge every day.
Make few promises, and speak the
Give fall measure and weigh with a
Content to common custom,’but not
to eeasaeow folly.
Hr eau-ions of believing ill, but
nr“ cMUioos of reporting it
Have courage to wear, your old
«»«be» util you can pay for new
1'aaak <4 Heaven with hearty pur-
fvt» aed strong hope to get there
D> g'xd to all. that thou mayest
»»»•y tay friends and gain thine
S oap , K04 MBOtvr l
P ottkr D rvo a . vd Cua
gffBend to "Hov to
tfriTTED with the loveliest'
1111 bathed with OvTlCUn*
The Van Mon