The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, September 11, 1913, Image 7

The Hood River glacier., September 11, 1913, Image 7

Image provided by: University of Oregon Libraries; Eugene, OR

About The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933 | View Entire Issue (Sept. 11, 1913)

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Newspaper Page TextHOOD RIVER GLAUhlt, THURSDAY, SEPTEMRER 11, 1913 fit 4 PA las WS 8 i 1 i 8 tfl is est WW S3 r, in u 9 n XI X M 19 ii i! Ask about our $400 Piano we are going to give away free to some one of our customers $2200 IN PREMIUMS AS FOLLOWS: - 1st Premium V 1 $400.00 Claxton Piano 2nd Premium. 1 Lady's Watch 20 year gold filled, 15 jewels, Elgin or Waltham movement, and one Duebill good for $300.00 on the purchase of a Claxton piano when accompanied by the balance in cash. 3rd Premium. 1 Lady's Watch 10 year gold filled, and one Duebill good for $295.00 on the purchase of a Claxton piano when accompanied by the balance in cash. 4th Premium. 1 Three-piece Toilet Set and one Duebill good for $290.00 on the purchase of a Claxton piano when accom panied by the balance in cash. 5th Premium. 1 Duebill good for $285.00 on the purchase of a Claxton piano when accompanied by the balance in cash. 6th Premium. 1 Duebill good for $280.00 on the purchase of Claxton piano when accompanied by the balance in cash. 7th Premium. 1 Duebill grod for $275.00 on the purchase of a Claxton piano when accompanied by the balance in cash. In addition to the above there will be given in weekly Premiums 149 pieces of silverware. Also Silverware Premiums for all during the Contest. This beautiful piano carries the manu facturers ten years guarantee. Bragg Mercantile Co. Moia; Poll ICaaHc MttVV II till UUUUJ Of every description are coming in every day now both by freight and express. We are in a better position to supply your needs than ever before with reliable goods at reasonable prices. r The new season's offerings are very practical as well as beautiful and best of all we are very glad to tell you that our prices are lower this season. We can and will give you more for your money than we could last year. Come in and let us prove it to you Here are a few instances to show that we mean what we say: 36 inch all Wool Serge, the yard SOc 36 inch Bordered Curtain Scrims 10c Regular 12 l-2c Outing Flannels 10c Regular 12 l-2c Flannelettes 10c New Oriental Draperies 10c and many more examples in all lines of merchandise in stock. The Ladies suits and coats and Misses and Children's coats are very reasonable in price this sea son and they certainly are attractive in appearance, de sign, fit and finish. Our all Wool Serge Suits at $15.00 are excellent values and correct in style. The jackets are full satin lined with velvet collars. Our line of Sweaters is full of surprises this year. We have an extra heavy jumbo knit long coat sweater in red and gray at $6.50 equal to most of those usu ally sold at $10.00. Bragg Mercantile Co. I Set '& & 1 I Siit 1 I i I m b & Set i 1 m & Set i 1 Set ' srv n trw tn tJ THE FORD THE UNIVERSAL CAR ONLY ONE M0t)EL The FORD Is a standardized car. The Ford Motor Company devotes all its time and facilities to the building of one model-one car, the Model T chas sis. Several different bodies, of course, but the one chassis, the one car, as, after all is said and done, the chassis is really the car. Now, consider what this means -the purchasing in maximum quant ities of all materials, parts and accessories, with the consequent low price that always follows quantity orders, with cash in hand for prompt payment. Con sider with an output of two hundred thousand or more cars in one year, what a force goes behind the buyer for the Ford Motor Company when he enters the market of supply; eight hundred thousand wheels, eight hundred thousand tires; one million lamps, all of the one size and one model; ninety thousand tons of steel, and spot cash in payment-no notes, no mortgages, no promises, no delay-spot cash. You cannot measure such a tremendous influence in its effect on price. Big buying and big production centered upon the making of one model-have made FORD VALUES maximumly high and FORD pricesininimumly low. COLUMBIA AUTO & MACHINE CO. nil 'iu( m WW hkWuWL JLVL . I . J n n 5 tl 5 X x 4 TORTOISE SHELL GLASSES. I CAN stand for tbe chap with U aso. ocrmmed shirt And the bojr with bla trousers up turned. And the man with th hat mad of pmsh, 1 assert. 1 ran stand, tfcoufh tha fad I bar purnwl; I can itand fur U gar with tba wblta In hla vest And not avan grin who ha paaaaa. But I anlckar and ami la whan 1 (as en tha wlitla Tba guy with tha turtoUa ahtll glaaaaa. I don't mind tha man with tba raktah grn hat With tha bow In tba hack nor tba fal low Who trims off aach aboa with an up to data spat Nor tha brothar wboaa glovoa ara blight yellow; Tba fur coated geak I don't quarrai with now That garb la being worn by all claaaea. But I'm ready to flea when that dandy I Tha guy with tha tortoise shell glasses. I can put up with hlra who must trim 08 each aleeve With a row of pearl buttons and note In silence the msn (though t secretly grieve With the braid on tha edge of his coat; The man with the handkerchief worn to be seen No longer my feelings hsrssses. But I do yearn to unite with my left and my right The guy with the tortoise shell glasses. -Detroit Free rVess. Rebuked. lie gave palpable evidence of weigh ing In the neighborhood of 240, and he towered Biz feet four Inches Into the air. lie looked aa If the cham p!ou heavyweight of the price ring might go down before blru like a reed before the wind. By bla aide stood little woman five feet ten and possibly ninety ihhuhIs In weight She had the meek and subdued look of a woman who had borne much. While they waited for their car on a corner a pass erby heard the giant say: "Can't you let me bare a quarter, Jennie?" Jennie's voice cut the air like a blade aa she said: "Now, see here, Jim Baggi, didn't I tell you before we left borne that 10 cents was all I Intended you should have to xpend? 1 sure did, an' I should think yon had been married to me long enough to kuow that when I say a thing 1 mean It! I think I aee you bavin' a whole quarter to fool away on aeegnra an' such stuff! Now, you make any more fuss aa' you'll atay at noma the next time 1 come to town!" Judge. His Gift. A young man was deeply to love with a beautiful girl. One day she told him that the next day would be her birthday, and be laughingly aald tlmt he would send ber a bunch of roses, one for each year of ber life. That evening be wrote to bis florist. ordering twenty-four rosea to be sent the young woman on the first delivery the next day. The proprietor of the flower shop, looking over the mall In tbe morning, saw the order and said to the foreman "John, here's an order from young Mr. Flint for twenty-four roses. He'a a mighty good customer, ao put In a dozen extra ones." And the young man never knew what made the gli'l so angry with hi in. -New Vork American. A Muffled Knock. Bookseller (having taken an order for note paper)-Ilave you read "Peb bles," sir? Had a wonderful sale. The Author of "rebbles"-Uas It? I think I could write as good a book my self. Bookseller (always prepared to agree with a customer) Do you? Well, I .-tally believe our boy could, air. Punch. I Mil II Mill 1 1 I IHI 1 1 1 1 I Not All Bliss. How dangerous Ignorance may be Is apparent In the fact that where a woman doesn't know how pretty she Is she Is Just that much prettier. Puck. I I I III 1 1 I 111 II II I HI H t-fr 80 Gensrous of Him. "So poor old Jobson baa failed. Too bad! lie promised me something yes terday, but now In bis trouble I won't bold him to It" "That's very generous of you. What was It?" "Ills daughter's band In marriage," Chicago News. Cautious. Judge (to notorious bank robber) They say you were In politics on the other side. Accused (with offended dignity) Never, your honor! Politics would have ruined my character. Fliegende Blatter Hew Dsafnsss Comes. Wttlwmt naln; the scientific terms, there are two kinds of deafness that creep nn 11s gradually, tbe hardening f tbe eardrum and tbe running ear, both conducive to less and less ability to bear clsrly. Ilany who are ao af filited attribute tbe ailment to catarrh al Influence or Increasing years and do nothing to remedy what they deem In curable. There Is no science ao back ward as that which deals with diseases of the ear. Aurtsts and ostologista have made some curative progress tu octoaiosls, a process of bone formation in which ossification takes place with in the aubsta nee of tbs cartilage. Fe cures have been actually effected, and prominent medical authority states that until the cause and cure of rhen- watlsiu are determined deafness will continue. Tbe presence of uric acid In the system U. according to this learned man, tbe cause of deafness either swift or progressive. Baniah this blood alien and tbe deaf will bear. It Is advisable. therefore, to watch out against the twinges of gout and the rheumatic stiffening of tbe Joints and muscles if deafness hi to be sidetracked Leslie's. FINE POKER. The Bibllemaniao's Error; There Is a famous story of a man. Don Vincente of Aragon, that la told by all writers upon tbe art of book bunting. This Don Vincente la called by Andrew Lang "the great pattern of blblloclepta." To get the book be coveted be killed Its possessor and aet Ore to bla bouse ao aa to rover up bis crime. But tbe man was at last sus pected and the famous book found in his possession to confirm tbe suspi cion. Tbe case against him was ar gued on the ground that there was but one copy In tbe world of tbe book found In bis possession, and Its previous own er waa known to all. Don Vincente bad a clever lawyer, who proved that another copy did exist In the Louvre, and since there were two, be argued, there might also be more, and ao Don Vincente might have come honestly by bis. At this Don Vincente gave a great cry aud aald to the alcalde: "Ah, Senor Alcalde, my error waa clumsy Indeed! My copy was not unique." Frederick A. Kiug in Bookman. The 8hspe of ths Sky. What la tbe apparent form of tbe vault of tbe sky? There la probably no one to whose eyes It seems a true hemisphere, with the cenltb appeariug aa distant aa tbe horizon. At sea or In a flat country tbe seeming greater distance of tbe horizon la beat shown. Professor J. M. Pernter In a atudy of Mils subject reached tbe conclusion tbat the form of the vault In vertical ectlon is tbat of tbe segment of a cir cle, the arc of wblcb subtends at tbe center at an angle of tbe order of 40 degrees. If tbe reader will draw aucb a segment be may be surprised by tbe amount of flattening which Is thus ascribed to tbe Bky.- From this optical Illusion many curious effects arise, such as tbe seeming Increased magni tude of tbe auu and moon wben near the horizon and tbe apparently oval forms of baloa and coronas seen at low altitudes. The Word "Humbug." The Idea of the "humbug" Is aa old as tbe first fakir of India, for the ear liest as well aa tbe latest of these. though ostensibly "holy men," and at times most sincere, are often only too ready to deceive tbe credulous by the tricks which they practice. But tbe word Itxelf Is explained as being a cor ruption of the word "Hamburg." Durttig the period wben war prevailed on the European continent many false reports and bulletins were Issued from tbe city of Hamburg. In Germany, so that Dually when any one wished to suggest hi disbelief In a statement, even If printed In the papers, be aald, "Ob. that comes from Hamburg," or "Tbat Is a Hamburg,'! goon corrupted Into "humbug" us the stamp of fakir-Ism.-New York Mall. Ths Bald Spot A child of two years, with bright eyes and a roguish mind, began sud denly to giggle In church one Sunday morning. Noticing tbe child watch ing the back of a nodding deacon'a bead, tbe mother Inquired Into the cause of such merriment "Oh. mamma," laughed the child, "dat man's head Is peeking out at ma through a bole In his hair!" National Monthly. 8he Doesn't Have To. "I know a woman who never has to ask her husband for money." "He must be a very good husband." "He Isn't." "Then bow Is It she never baa.to ask blm for money?" "Because the court makes blm pay ber alimony." Baltimore American. 8olsntifio. A scientific writer says that the only color that can be determined by tbe aense of touch la blue. True enough. A man always knows wben he feelg "blue." New Orleans Picayune. Just His Idea. Tommy-Pop, are tbe bald eagles a distinct variety? Tommy'a Pop 1 can't aay positively, my son, but I rather fancy a bald eagle Is simply a mar ried one. Philadelphia Record. More Convsnlent 'Does a certain sublimated and ob jective altruism ever move you?" "No; we generally use a couple of big motor trucks. "-Exchange. Ths Crista. Randall-Wben did be first amount to anything? Rogers Wben be first realized tbat be didn't amount to any thing -Life. How ths Gsvsrner of Idaho Outguessed a Drummer. ALTHOUGH ex-President Taft is not a poker player and takes no interest In any cards except bridge, be pronounces tbe following to be the best poker story be ever beard: The governor of Idaho was playing French euchre Ua a druu,mer, and at one stage In tbe game the governor looked at his hand and remarked: "If you give me a queen and turn this Into a poker game I will bet you. 1100 on tbe baud." The drummer looked at his band and then exclaimed In great excitement: "And I will raise jou $1,000 If you take It!" Tbe governor accepted the raise, and the hands were laid down on the table. The governor held four aces, the drum mer four kings. The loser, showing signs of great ineutal distress, sepa rated himself with some difficulty from, tbe $1,100. Tbeu he looked at the governor aa if greatly bewildered and made tbe request: "Can I ask you Just one question?" "Yes," laughed the gov-rnor, who was In high good humor. "Well, governor, will you tell me what In thunder you wanted that queen for?" Popular Mugazlne. Disliked a Gambler. An overwrought business man bolt ed headforemost Into a luurb room th other day and pounded on tbe coun ter. "Ham 'neg sandwich, quick!" he or dered. There was a wait of five minutes, and the man at tbe counter laid a roast beef sandwich In front of him. "I didn't order this!" yelped the cus tomer. "Bring me a bam-'neg sand wich!" Another wait and tbe counter man presented the exasperated customer with a cup of cocoa. The overwrought business man pulled bis derby down over his ears and headed for the door. 'Where are you going?" demanded the counter man. "To a restuurant where the cook doesn't gamble with the food!" snap ped the overwrought citizen as be dis appeared. Washington Post They All Say It. Once upon a time there were a fellow and a girl. The fellow came a-caiUng. He meunt business. After awhile the friends of the tfirl began to josh her about blm, asking ber when It was going to be, and all that She replied. Among other things she said: "Marry that pill? I guess not" "That snippy little thing? Not for miue." "1 wouldn't marry him If be was the last man on earth." "Oh, he's well enough In bis way, but he's not my uotlon of a husband." "I wish you people would stop your nuuseuse. He's absolutely nothing to me." "1 guess you think I must be pretty bard up to want to marry that," The Sequel, And did she subse quently marry a prince? Not exactly. She married "that" They all do, Brooklyn Times. Willing. 4 Mr. Gnysport IIow much does that reckless son of mine owe you for all tmlirolderlug you've done for him? Mii Sweetly Only bis love. Mr. Gay sport Well, I've never com plained about paying his debts. Chi cago News The Reply. A lady of advanced age required the services of a page boy and advertised, "Youth wanted." One of ber dearest friends sent her by the next post a bottle of Blank's celebrated wrinkle Oiler and skin tightener, a pot of fairy bloom, set of false teeth and a flaxen wig. Lon don Oplulon. Big Letters. Griggs-Say, did your wife ever find any letters lu your pocket and raise a row? Brigga - She's found X's and V'a there, but she always kept quiet about It Baltimore American. I- -I--I -I--I -I-1--t--I-! ! -1 I ! I- I I I I I I I I' Diplomacy. Always forgive your enemy 4. wben he hns you down. Clncln- T natl Enquirer. "1-H-t I I I N i l Mllll I I I I I I K-r There Are Others. "Mrs Mortimer says she derives more pleasure from tbe education of her children than anything else." "Yes. She's never happy unless they're at tbelr kindergarten." Fun. Who Can Tell? "Well, I'm kind of sorry It's a girt." "Nonsense. She may be president of tbe Tiilted States some day." Fun. FRUIT STAMPS MADE TO ORDER at the Glacier Office Order them early and be ready to mark your Pear and Ap ple Boxes when it is time to pack.