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About The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933 | View Entire Issue (Aug. 24, 1900)
1 MINES AND MINING.! -L ARE EAGER TO buy. Klundiki-100i Output of (in 111 for I lie Year Will Keurh n Total nt 1125,000,000. Dawson, Y. T., August 18. The Klondike output of cold during the yeai 1900 will reach 125,000,000. Improved methods of mining, resulting from the introduction of suitable nm chinery, together with a better knowl edge of conditions here, etc., cheapen ing the cot of production, and ground that was formerly unprofitable in now paying. Wages are fairly good, $5 per day and board being the ruling pay, iind, while there are many idle men complaining of dull time, one who rcaiy wants work can get it. The action of the Canadian govern nient in prohibiting relocations on all the creeks and closing Bonanza and El dorado to location, is driving out the prospector and email miner, and re turd developmment to that extent Capital is coming in,-however, and groups and blocks of claims are being bougut up for large workings. It is the old story of tho individual miner giving way to the syndicates, an hunting new prospects. Hundreds r these during the lant spring have left the Klondike and gone to American territory, where, it is claimed, the poor matt has a better chance than here Nome has taken the minority, but nauv have gone to i)rir points. An early rush went to the Koyukuk, ai late reports from there are very unfavorable, Parties just returned say that very little gold has been taken out ill that camp, and the ground Jjis ex ceedinglv diflicnlt to work on account of glaciors which overlie the bedrock The Forty-Mile and Hirch Creek dig' giiijs, both of which were practically deserted in the rusu to Dawson in 1897 and later in the Nome stampede last fall, are again coming into favor, 'or it las never been disputed that there is much good ground there that will pay wages and more. The latest candidate for popnlar fa vor is the Tanann district. Hermits from there are generally good. The gronnd is three to seven feet deep only, overlaying a slate anil purphry bed rock, and there is plenty of water for sluicing, all of which makes it an ideal counrty for summer working. It is said to be easily approached from the Tanima river. One to four ounces per day is said to be the usual amount per man, shoveling into the sluices. Tho recent action of the United States government in surveying a rail road and telegraph route from Valde to Eagle City, and its promptness in pushing through a trail with stations, etc., along the line, is attracting much attention here. The further fact that the various civil officers for the eastern division of Alaska, embracing the Koy ukuk, Tanann and Yukon water-sheds are now duly installed at Euglo City, gives great satisfaction. It is a long step in the right direction, and. great developments may be expected in Alas ha within a few years. Northwest Notes, in Yamhill county, Or., hoppickors are quite generally paid by the pound, Walla Walla apples have takeu third prize at the Paris exposition roini-on to no niorrj mini nr. oiis in Coos county, Or., than for some years past. Spokane's assessed valuation is about ifl'O.OOO.OOO, and the city's indebted ness is 1188,159. l'oineroy. Wash., ia rapidly rebuild ing. and in several cases substantial - brick buildings will replace the old wooden ones destroyed by fire. An evaporating plant of 20 tons cu paoity daily is in course of erection at bpokano. It will handle prunes and apples, and next year will also engage in canning. The barbed wire telephone line, con necting Condon.Or., with several of the ranches in the neighborhood, has been completed, and is pronounced a great success." ino walla Walla Watchman hiiB suUeied from 'Too Much Johnson." A solicitor of that name made adver tising contracts for the paper, collocted on them and suddenly departed. Work has commenced on the con struotion of Roseburg's, Or., new water Bystein. rick and shovol men are ex cavating for the reservoir on the hill between the town and Riverside addi tion. Country It, Artlvcly Treparlug for the Full Trail.. R. G. Dun & Co.'i weekly review of trade says: After a great wave of ad vancing prices, optimism as tobuBiness is generally dangeious. Eut the top was reached the middle oi March, since which time reaction has tome to every great industry, so that consumers are asking whether in some riiiections the decline may have not been reasonably large as was the advance, and whether buying on the present basis of prices is not fairly suro. There are fresh evi dences of weakness in raw materials, notably the break in structural iron, but each one is availed of to place heavy contracts. New York is wel coming buyers from all over the couu- ( try in larger numbers than for many years at this season, in dry good e, gro ceries, in jewelry and in hardware, and if contracts are not placed to as large a volume as expected, it is be cause of the conservatism of those who think they may compel gome further shading of prices. Reports this week from other Important points of distri-. bution show the same eagerness to boy 1 when the time seems right. It is be coming more apparent that the bottom has been reached in prices of iion and steel. The decline was severe and re covery must be slow, but gradual ad vance and moderately increasing activ ity are more healthy than violent changes. In no singlo division is the improvement more striking than in any other. Except steel rails, all forms of iron from the ore to the finished pro duct are being sought more eagerly and with less effort to secure further con cessions in prices, but when tho secre tary of agriculture was reported as pre dicting "dollar wheat" before the end of the year, the market showed an in clination to disagree, and the Septem ber option fell below 80 cents for tin first time in two months. sjjjwention PACIFIC COAST 'TRADE. Seattle Markets. Onions, new, I40. Lettuce, hot house, $1 per crate. 1'otatoes, new. f 15. Beets, per sack, 83ca.$l, Turnips, per sack, 70c. Squash 4c. Carrots, per sack, $1.00 Parsnips, per sack, $1.25. Cauliflower, native, 75c. Cncnnibers 1020o. ., Cabbage, native and California, 2c per pounds. Tomatoes 50 CO". Butter Creamery, 25c: Eastern 22c dairy, 15 18c; ranoh, Ho pound. Eggs 24o. Cheese 12o. rouury izo; areeseu, I4cj spring, 13(? 15c. Hay Paget Sound timothy, $11.00 12.00; choice Eastern Washiiigto: timothy, $16.00. Corn Whole, $23.00; cracked, $25 feed meal, $25. Bailey Rolled or ground, per ton, $20. Flour Patent, per barrel, $3.50 Idem led straights, $3.25; California, $3,25; buckwhoat flour, $6.00; gra ham, per barrel, $3.00; whole wheat flonr, $3.25; rye flour, $3.804.00. Millstuffs Bran, per ton, $12.00 shorts, per ton, $14.00. reed Chopped feed, $19.00 per ton middlings, per ton, $20; oil cake moul per ton, $30.00. Fresh Meats Choice dressed bcel steers, price 7Kc; cows, 7c; mutton 7,'a; pork, 8c; trimmed, 9c; veal, 9i 11c. Hams Large, breakfast bacon, 8,ls'c. 13c; 12c; dry salt A sides The Albany Herald says that people who are coming home from tlm moun tains report that numerous parties are hunting ueuny pheasants. The came warden and his deputies are doing their oust 10 stop the unlawful shooting. Mrs. L. J. Davis, of Jefferson. Or. met with a singular accident one day last week. She was canniua Green beans and a can exploded, the contents striking her in the face. Fortunately, her eyes were not seriously injured, nun sue win soon recover. A deal was consummated recently in Baker City, wheruby 8,000 head of sheep changed hands and a check ior nearly $20,000 passed inpayment. The sheep were the property of Gale Bros. 01 isuker, ana the flock was one of the finest in the country. The purchaser was Mr. Nealy, of Idaho. The sheep will be transferred across Snake river into Idaho as soon as cool weater sets in. Pat Shine is the name of the chair man of the Spokane county Populist central committee. The outlook for beef-raisers is pretty good at present, says The Dalles Times Mountaineer. Buyers are offeiiug to contract for cattle at 4 cents fur fall delivery. The Bntteville, Or., hop region is the largest ia the state, and the agree ment of growers to pay 85 cents a box is having an important bearing on the price to be paid pickers generally. Grass and water are both reported short in the mountains of Grant eoun t . Or., and many bauds of sheep will . bo in poor condition for the winter. From August 1 to 11 Walla Walla lent 35 carloads of fiuits and vegeta bles to the North Central states. The shipments consisted principally of ap ples, pears, plums, potatoes and onions. The fund for work on the road be tween Eugene and Blue river, Or., has reached ' tho respectable total of $5,241.50. Of this sum, Lane county's commissioners subscribed $2,500 and the Lucky Boy Miniug Company $500. j Portland Market. Wheat Walla Walla. 54 c Valley, 65c; Bluestem, 57c per bushel Hour Best grades, $3.10; graham $2.50; superline, $3.10 per barrel. Oats Choice white, 87c; choice gray, 800 per bushel. Barley Feed barley, $15.00 15.50 brewing, $17.00 per ton. Millstuffs Bran, $13.00 ton; mid dlings, $20; shorts, $15; chop, $15 pot ton. Hay Timothy, $11 12; clover,$7 7.60; Oregon wild hay, $67 per ton Butter lancy creamery, 45 50c; store, 27, Ho. Eggs 17o per dozen. Cheese Oregon full cream, 13c; Young America, 14c; new cheese 10c per pound. Poultry Chickens, mixed, $3.00 8.50 per dozen; hens, $5.00; springs, $2.604.00; goese, $4.005.00 for old; $4.606.60; ducks, $3.004.00 per uozeu; lumeys, uve, io17 per pound. Potatoes 40 6O0 per sack; sweets, 88'c per pouna. vegetables Beets, $1; turnips, 75c; per sack; garlic, 7o per pound; cab bage, 2o per pound; parsnips, $1 onions, lJio per pound; carrots, l)0o. Hops 2 80 per pound. Wool Valley, 1516o per pound; Eastern Oregon, 15 16c; mohair, 25 per pound. Mutton Gross, best sheep, wethers and ewes, 8?4o; dressed mutton, 7 7 Ho per pound; lambs, 5o. Hogs Gross, choice heavy, $5.00: light and feeders, $4.50; dressed. $5.00 6.50 per 100 pounds. Beef Gross, top steers, $4.004.50: cows, $3. 50 4. 00; dressed beef, 6,H per pound. eal Laive, 6.,7.,.ic: small. 8(3 8 Ho per pound. Ran Frauoiico Market. Wool Spring Nevada, ll13oper pound; Eastern Oregon, 1014o; Val ley, 1018o; Northern, 9 10c. Hops 18UU crop, ll13o per pound. Butter Fancy creamery 2322,,B'o: lo Beconds, 21 21c; fancy dairy. 19c; do seconds, 16 18o per pound. Eggs Store, 17o; fauoy ranch. S2o. Millstuffs Middlings, $17.00 20.00; bran, $12.50 13.60. Hay Wheat $S12; wheat and oat $8.00 11.00; best barley $8.50 alfalfa, $0.00 7.60 per ton; straw, 2587 'so per bale. Potatoes Early Rose, 3075o; Ore iron Burbanks, 90c $1; river Bur banks, 80 60c; new. lH2o. Citrus Fruit Oranges, Valencia, 13.75 3. 25; Mexican limes, $4.00 5.00; California lemons 75c$1.50; do choice $1.753.00 per box. Tropical Fruits Bananas, $1.50 8.60 per bunch: Dineamiles. 110111. Railway authorities of the Mexican govern men t have been ordered to use certain safety appliances. All the pas senger curs must be so equipped before the end of 1!)04. Forty-one gas engines using blast-fur- nu.ee gas ure working In Germany, the total horse power aggregating 21,050. Tho 'horse power of such engines In Belgium Is 3,7uu, France 3,250 and En gland L'.OUO. 1 A company formed by English and American capitalists is about to build the largest wood-pulp plant In the world at Grand Falls, New Brunswick The works are to cost $0,000,000, and they will be capable of turning out 5,."no tons of white newspaper, 225 tons of ground wood pulp and 175 tons of sulphite pulp dally. I A Russian chemist has found that copper Is (Unsolved by hu alkaline solu tiou of gelatin, the copper going Into solution as colloidal copper. The old rule that the metals aro insoluble In water is being widely disproved, solu tions of metallic gold, mercury and sil ver, and now of copper, having been prepared quite recently. In all these the metals are in a very flue condition, but are true metallic solutious. In painting or papering the walls of a loom the question often arises, What color reflects the most and what the least light? Recent experiments In Ger many gave the following results: Dark blue reflects Ufa per cent, or the light falling upon It; dark green about 10 per cent.; pale red a little more than 10 per cent.; dark yellow, 20 per cent.; pale blue, 30 per cent.; pale yellow, 40 per cent.; pule green, 4(J'u P--r cent.; pale orange, nearly 55 per cent.; pale white, 70 per cent. Glossiness and var nish of course Increase the amount of light reflected. The play of "Robinson Crusoe" Is now given in one of the Paris theaters with four animals in the cast of actors. These are a goat, a monkey, a paroquet, and chief of nil, a dog who enacts the part of Robinson's faithful companion, "Toby." The dog's real name Is Faro, and a writer in La Nature says he will respond to that name only when in the street or at his master's home, but on the stage he answers promptly the call, "Toby." When Robinson shoots a bird, "Toby" runs and picks It up, climbs up a ladder Into Robinson's hut, and gives the bird to "Friday," who acts as cook. This vapor In the air Is entirely in visible until the air Is brought lo a tem perature just below the dewpoint, when a fog Is formed. How often a dense fog in the morning is dissipated by the sun, and we say the sun has "burned off" the fog. Fog rarely forms except In a perfectly clear, still air. This per mits intense radiation from the ground iind smoke particles, and this cooling Dually brings the air to its saturation point, when the vapor either condenses 011 the smoke particles or on moisture particles, thus becoming visible in fog. When this fog occurs far above the earth it Is cloud. three-quarters of the sardines sold hero are put up In fifty-one packing-houses In Maine. These concerns are con trolled by a trust company, which em ploys 0,000 workmen, who can turn out 1,500,000 cases of the fish annually. "In Maine sardines are caught off the western shores of the St. Croix River and Passamaquoddy Bay. The fishing season commences early in May and lfuts until late In the fall of the year, The fish are taken In brush weirs, re sembling ordinary pound nets, Into which they are led by means of large leaders and wings, which terminate In a funnel-shaped entrance. Their escape Is prevented by the extension of these wings luto the Inclosure, thereby form ing a triangular hook at each eud of it, so that the fish, as they circle inside the weir, are directed past the entrance. When the flsli are plentiful in the nets quantities of scales appear upon the surface of the water. The nets are then lifted and their coutents are dumped by the fishermen luto their boats. The fish make a little squeak when taken from the water and die almost Instant ly. An ordinary catch of sardines gives to each boat anywhere from 2,000 to 0,000 Ash, the price of which Is from $2 to ?2.50 per 1,000, according to the quantity of fish that are being caught "Arriving at the packing-house, the fish are carefully cleaned. This opera tion over, they are sorted according to size and carried Into another part of the establishment, where they are put into pickle. "The length of time required by this operation varies according to the size of the fish. After this the fish are washed and placed with care upon wire nets, called 'grills,' on which they are sent to the drying-room, where they aredriedby means of large funs or veu tilators run by powerful machinery When dry . and while still upon the grills the fish are cooked by plunging them Into tanks containing boiling olive oil. After this cookinz the sar- SET BURGLAR UP IN BUSINESS. Novel Experience of a Physician Who Dressed a Housebreaker's Wounda. "The strangest patient I ever had," said a prominent physician of this city the other evening, "wag a burglar. My acquaintance with him began In a sin gular manner. "After 1 was graduated 1 was en gaged at night in one of the largest hospitals In New York, where I saw many strange sights. Oue night our ambulance brought In a prisoner pa tient, accompanied by two policemen. The officers said that the man hud been surprised while attempting to rob au apartment In a large flatbouse. A po liceman was called, who chased him Into a room with a window opening on an airshaft, "It was warm weather and the shaft window was open, as wns also the window In the apartment on the op posite side. Finding himself closely pursued, the burglar, who was young and athletic, jumped from oue window to the other, Jumped across the airsbaft. lie landed In the other apartment all right, but fell plump ou a man who was asleep In bed close to t he shaft window. The sleeper so rudely awak ened gave a yell and attempted to seize the burglar The latter. In seeking to elude him and at the same time avoid the policeman, who was at the opposite window, threatened to shoot, fell down the airsbaft and was badly Injured. 1 made an examination and found that be had broken his tigbt leg at the ankle, was considerably bruised, and also suffering from shock from his fall. 1 fixed him up all right and he remained e prisoner In the hospital for several weeks. At first he was morose and surly, but gradually he began to show gratitude for the kind treatment he received. He became a favorite with all the doctors and we gradually learned bis story, another name now. 1 aa flnnciuln osm4.l. u.i, oi.cuuug a acandai Aha! I thought that girl would 1 in that. She tlininrlit al.Q "- n sots, some, and Miss Kldder-So did Mr. Mlvu, That's how she hanuened t v. Mra Mllvnna " TMln.1.,1.,1.1- Wt ....... uiuut'luili fCSI, - vnri n ItrPPT . A r-cnndal Fnolvi HUM OK UJ? Til& HIIV Mis. Gousslp-I haven't heara, uiiuB ui dnoo x ccuib since 1 eut 1 rrnni Ahrnurl Ul K stories TOLD BY FUNNY MEN Miss Kldder-No, she's llvlnz "wnl nnntlipr noma rtnm OF THE PRtao. ndd. Curloui mud Langnaoio ' ... ii.M. H-man Natur. Graphically - .r.v..d by Eminent Word Arti.t. of Our Own Day-A Budget of Fun. . . n n ri fltll' other virtues you are training Freder- In (wnnnmv? 1 ..IIu'o nrfttr well UD In that; you ought to see how careful he is about wasting stepsl-NashvIlle American. Table Talk, Sue-That Mr. Boorlsch, of Chicago, J 4 rn Id lltt Is a man or pronouueeu iaSl, ..Ue toU nie j dl(,u,t not? because of mv tendencv t wi . ' He-.Monotonously so. He makes the i, same sounds over ins buup "c over his meat or pie. ruiiuucij". rress, Midsummer Science, 'To. what Is action and reaction1 "Well. Geni'Ep. mv n-lilt j..,. ...... ,lc uucu 14 Auunc uuvj lUUnU! make me hot." jr tin, What lie Paid to Learn. "I waited three solid hours for , imuij ivimci iv ci uluuuu 10 ni "Well?" At the Summer Hotel, "Who Is that good-looking young waiter who Is tossing the plates across the room? Is he a student, too I 'Yes. lie holds the record In Harvale for discus throwing." Cleveland Plain- dealer. A Hot-Weather Error. "Did Wlggs' garden party go off m right?" "No; they took us all Into the hoiu, and made us play euchre." Diagnosed Uia Case. He I feel like a fool to-ulgut. She So glad you'vo recovered,., Journal Four Tous. Family I'ride. He had been an honest, hnrd. wnrlr. dines, still upon the grills, are left to ing man In another citv and had -nn cool, and when cold the work of plac- to New York to better himself. Hav ing them In halves and quarter cans Ing no friends here, he was unable to nnea witn olive oil, tomato and mus- obtain work and soon Rnpnt nil Ma in. tnivl Hanr.a la Irnnim 'ri.ia I .1- , . UifcUU. iulo null uuuc, I ue savings, lie KeDt aet line noorer A PLUCKY YACHTSWOMAN. Phe Eteercd a Boat n Long Distance with a broken Wriat. The heroine of the Long Island coast If Miss Auuie R. Tinker, only 10 years old, and tbe daughter of Henry C. Tinker, of New York. While out yacht ing she was steering the boat when she was struck by the flying spokes of the wheel aud her wrist fractured. She made no outcry, however, but remain ed at the wheel as If nothing had hap pencil. Mr. Tinkers -country residence, "111 iarerof t," Is on the west side of the bay nt Port Jefferson. Some time ago he had a yacht built, and when the boat was finished announced that In me cans are sealed with solder aud are ready to be put in cases, holding 100 tins, for the market. "Like canned goods of every descrlp tion, sardines are cheaper now than they formerly were, and American sar dines are sold for less than the Im ported. American sardines are now exported from this country to the West Indies and South America." Washing ton Star. GUIDED BY HIS SON'S GHOST. Successful Gold-Seeker Was Piloted to a Find by a Spirit, There was something uncanny In the story that Albert Davis told at the I'nlcn llolmr Allial-f Tlm-lo lu n nine Mountain prospector, bound for his old sh("ve1 uf gratitude especially to me. icceiveu mm ana nxeu un his ana poorer, and while penniless and almost starving attemDted his first burglary by breaking into the flat where he was caught. We took such an Interest in him tnat, although he was convicted, the Judge suspended sentence upon our proving his previous good character and that it was his flrst offense. He was nn expert t!nsmith and we raised a subscription and set him up In busi ness in a little shop. We sent all our friends to him and he prospered aud now has a large store here. He mar ried and has several children and 1 uave Deen tils family physician for years. Although all the doctors at the hospital helped him at the start, he home In the village of Arkwright, N. Y. Not far from his home is Casadugua Lake, the assembly grounds of the Spiritualist cult, and from association with Spiritualists Mr. Davis bet-ame In time a sort of lukewarm believer in their teachings. He returns, he says, a true believer. He also returns with wealth In prospect. Mr. Davis told his story In the presence of several fellow passengers at the depot. It was In sub stance this: xuree years ago his only son died. The father was all but heartbroken; he would not be comforted by the prom muueu ieg uie nigin ne was urouirbt a nrisoner to the hospital." , fer K.T7CKT Tdr NO TACHTSWOMAtf. the near future he would give a lunch eon party to the men who worked upon It and their families. It was arranged that the party should be carried from the village of Rriarcroft in oue of Mr. Tluker's launches, aud when the party got aboard Miss Tinker took her posl tion at the wheel. Tho minute the craft got under way tho wheel spun round and struck Miss Tinker on the ht arm. But not a word did the brave girl say of the accident, and steered the boat for a mile aud a half with her left hand, to her father's lauding;. When all were ashore she ordered her horse hitched aud drove three miles to doctor's office, where the bone was set. Returuiug home, she made no mention of the accident and assisted In ntertalnlng her father's guests. iual; Persian pound. dates, 6 g6 So pel SARDINES CANNED IN AMERICA. ew of the Toothsome Little Pish Are Krought from Abroad. "Next to the French the American people are the largest consumers of sardines la the world," said a leading wholesale dealer in such cauued goods lu New York to the writer recently. "Last year the consumption of sardines in the United States amounted to 2,000,000 cases, or 200.000,000 cans. Of this quautity 1,400,000 cases were the product of the State of Maine. 150,000 cases were put up la California, and the remaining 450,000 cases came from France. Thirty years ago all the sar diues eaten in this couutry were Im ported from France. To-Jay nearly minam rett Kidge. the author of Mord EmTy"-a story of the East End lses of his Spiritualist friends that the or London-has had his new novel, "A jouug man would come back to him. "'uuhtr 01 aws, published in this nut one night the boy did come, and country by the Macmillan Comnanv mill HUllin. J rim1 surnrn tlauc Mra I,-t!tlw... D..I o...-,- - . ... w. .uvv ....a. uoiuci uhwt sMeeie una mint a nocturnal visits, the sou told of ac- fine public librarv in Klmim mil nf tl.A qiittlutauces that he had made in the royalties from her own lm,.i.-a o,i spirit world, among them, he said, being text books of her late husbaud, J. Dor one whose name was John Fremont, man Steele. This is to be called the This spirit told of his wonderful life In Steele Memorial Library, In memorv of .... am, imiuuy omei- iaies, one uer iiusoauu. of a rich mine that he had discovered, out which never had been found by others. On subsequent visits the sou told more particularly of the mine and gave detailed descriptions of its situa tion, until Mr. Davis became so deeply Interested that he resolved to go in search of it. Two years ago he tame to Colorado, and after a long search found the range of mountains that had been described to him. They were the Blue Mountains, near the Utah line. But his search was not completed. Weeks and months were spent in pros pecting and hunting for the marks on the surface that would disclose the hiding place of the treasure. He was on the point of giving up, and also of i i . ... lumug iiuiu in cue spirits, when one evening he came onto the very spot that he was searching for. He knew it, he said, as well as if he had been there be fore. "The Enslavement and Emanclnn. tion of the People" Is a little book hv J. B. Herboldshlmer. in wiitr.ii ni, of a prominent auestion of economy are considered. The author paints the present condition of the In- dustrlal world, and suggests an original and practical solution of its problems. The work Is published by the author' at Gibson City, 111. , An author's manuscript often has strange experiences before It reaches its destined publisher If It ever does. Certain members of the new firm of Doubleday, Page & Co. received the other day the "copy" of "The Sea-Far-ers, a uovel by Mary Gray Morrisou. t-acn remembered it as a raanuscrint they had passed favorably on some years ago, when they occupied the po sitions of under readers in separate houses, but, alas, the head readers did A Good Suit. Bobbs Clothes do not make the mm. Dobbs No, but many a lawyer bu been made by a good suit. Bultiruon American. Swelling; the Lost Dog Column, "Do you keep a dog?" "Never more than a couple of days." -Cleveland Plalndealer. An Explanation. Mistress Why, Jane, what' In tk world is the matter with the cream? Jane I don't see anything ysm. with it, ma'am. Mistress But what makes it so pale! Jane I reckon that's because I nearly beat the life out of it when you ordered it whipped, ma'am.-ChIcago News. Small Child (calling)-'Ere, Billy! Run and fetch ve bloomln' amber- lauce! Billy (from distance) Wot 8 up, ven ': Small Child Muvver's met ve lydy wot pinched ar doormat Sketch. Is beautiful, Egrotlntlcal. She I adore all that grand and noble. He Really, you flatter nie.-Chlcam News. Her Weakness. "I don't suppose your wife will care to go to the lecture ou 'Cannibalism' to-night?" "Oh, yes, she will. She never neg lects to go anywhere where they talk about things to eat." Cleveland Tlaln- dealer. Recovered It, "Mrs. nighsome did not seem to t In good voice at that uiusicale the other evening." "She was after she got home. I heard her roasting Highsome for having In. sisted on her trying to sing." Chicago Tribune. Ask for What Yon Want. There Are Many Pnch. Mrs. Hoon You can believe very lit tle that Mrs. Gabbleby says. Mr. Hoon No; the poor woman Is sadly afflicted with palpitation of the Imagination. Puck. In the Rhetoric Class. Young Frofessor Give me an exam ple of sarcasm. Sweet Junloress The phrase, "Man's superiority to woman." Somervllle Journal. A Heal Vacation. "You and your wife don't seem to talk to each other much when you travel." "No; we agreed before we started that we'd get rested." Chicago Record. Bather Ambiguous. Old Gentlenion How old are vou. mv uiue man Newsboy Nearly 7. sir. Old Gentleman And how lone have you Deen In the newspaper business? Aewsboy Oh, ever since I was a kid. Ghicago News. "My dear, won't you give me a loci of your hair?" "With pleasure, my darling." "And a nice gold locket to keep it InJ -Sondags-Nisse. Parental Deduction. Mrs. Homestead Our son at Tale writes that he received our letter and immediately tukes pains to reply. Mr. Homestead Thet don't surprise nie any the fust sight of anythin' re- n...i.n..i i .... eeuiuiiu wora nuers cave that hov a pain somewhar or other. Judge. Needed No Help. Mr. Davis lost nn time tn mii.-in,, ml aSree wlttl them, and so the manu- mineral location, and is now returning scrlpt 8,arted oa 'ts wanderings once to his old home to get money, when he mole' 11 wil1 now travel no further. Too Wise to Let Go. "Why can't you afford a vacation trip, Billy? You need a rest" "A rest? When I go away for a week the other boys in the office nlle un three weeks' work on me." Chleaeo Record. Their Deceit. She Appearances are deceitful. He Yes; a person can never tell fast how much it is going to cost to keep them up. Puck. Bnilt to Fit the Flat. "Oh, Isabel, what a queer looking grandfather's clock!" "Grandfather's clock! That's our let chest." Indianapolis Journal. will return to Colorado to develop the mine to which the spirit directed him. He has not yet found ore, but he ex pressed a firm belief that It was there. Denver Republican. for its date of publication has been set up for you? Sympathetic Friend Won't dowu to lunch? Shall I bring any thine 'hae' for 'have-' " Premature. "W7ell, old man, I am going down t the seashore to visit my fiancee," "Who is she?" "How do I know?" Life. The Cheerful Idiot. 'I can't see," said the shoe clerk boarder, "why a Sctochman should say for the near future. Honor to White of Selborne. uuuert White, the father of all thi nature lovers aud observers who are so common since Thoreau, Is to have an Ideal memorial. The forest of Wool- mer, oue of the crown properties of Lnglaud, is to be made into an asylum for the wild creatures of Eusland. and Minute Measure for Tfiniwntn, Prof. S. P. Langley, of the Smith" sonlan Institution of Washington, has recently improved his wonderful bol- uuieier, uu instrument for accurately Seasick Sufferer Thanks do all that for myself. Fun. "It is his economical disposition. He No, I can 8aves a v every time he does so," said the UUeerfUl Idiot. Ilirltnnniinlla PivkS. Wanted a Wlf. Miss Antique-You ought to get mar- iit-u, jir. uiacnapp. Mr. Oldchaim have ..,,.,,..,,..!.,.. i .. . . w lsiiea mnnv t mac ifi.. 4.i.i . i.icucuiui6 me uiosi minute variations .. """ i naa a of temnerature. Hp is m iio t ,i. tect variations in temperature as slieht ' Mlss Anti(Iue (delighted) Have a the one eighteen-millionth nf ,io really? you, - Aglnx. Miss Summit That young Mr. Gallo way doesn't know nearly as much as I thought he did. Miss ralisade You must remember he has been out of college fully two years now Life. gree Fahrenheit. If the temperature I 01dehPP-Yes. If I had a wife The Reply Unkind. Leading Lady What did you of the air were slowly aud steadilv to thea Probably have a sewlne maehin nf mv fnii surrounded bv defenses tn twn nut oil rise at the rate of but and the sewing machine U'nn 111 1, n .... I C 1 v ,., think ew intruders, though the forest will be al- luls instrument could measure the n' ana 1 coula ' e it and oil mv nj vpvu tu uk'u oi lute s sort. A v ""h nmi'u uuiu tune piace at una v,mu- aqueatvs norrlblv V siuuie or tne seuiorne parson will ,u vaKU secouu or time. The ap staud at the main entrance, with hand P"l'atus is kept shaded and fully pro raised In the act of liberatim? n hh-.i tected In a constaiirtemneratu re rnnm wiucu is not allowed to vary more than a fraction of a degree the year around. . Soubrette I didn't notice any. Hai per'8 Bazar. that has beeu trapped. Gamekeepers and watchmen will guard the forest night and day; eat nor dog will be al lowed to euter the paradise of free life. This is a wonderful thing to contem plate in this day of Indiscriminate and exterminating slaughter, aud It is a beautiful honor to Gilbert White Springfield Republican. No Oysters in the Baltic. Oysters cannot live in the Baltic Sea The reason is that It Is not salt enough. They can only live lb water that con tains at least thirty-seven parts of salt In every 1,000 parts of water. One of China' Superstition. Black dogs and black cuts are the fa vorites lu Chiua lu the line of food, be au se when eaten in midsummer they will Insure health aid strength. I have lived nearly eighty years." an old man said the other day. "and have seen very little to liv fot." Southern Moonshiners. The great majority of moonshiner are to be found In the mountain fast nesses of Georgia, Alabama aud Ten uossee, and here they live In conditio of civilization as crude as thplr nn,... York Weekly. DiffVl-Pnt:. ("DId you ever enjoy a straw ride In the country?" "No." "By George, old man, you ought to go on oue once!" B -rl!T'e- 1 Sa!d 1 nev" enJyed one." Could Speak Feelingly. miner, you say, pi-euy Droad hit that 6e you a he didn't want tors, most of whom were English fuel-! '0l,.ccnimS there any more, did he''" lives from justice who reached this 1 , Aa w' wuth," brefly responded vuu.it, j mt.iv- ninu a cemury ago. In-' mou. .mcago Tribune iieeu, m mauy respects these descend ants have retrograded rather than ad vanced. Had they been surrounded for a ceutury by a Chinese wall they could not have been more destitute or ignorant of the modern conveniences. Teemed Fair He Settled It. It was in the 'bus. "Let me pay your fare," the first girl said. "No; let me pay yours." said the seo ond. I "No; I insist on paying yours." "No, you don't; I will pay yours." wo; 1 will." , I will!" ( ' I ' There is no telling what miirbt have happened had not an old meddler, who was seated opposite, leaned over and said: "Listen, young ladies; do not lose your heads. I think I can settle this "I'd liL-o t u i 'VU1 "cuus. i iuiuk i can seme new- man i th ' f Q0Ws" the latter without blood being shed. Each uew man, w un some mi.M . . .. . " . ""'i wnetner U1 Jou pay ior the other, neither ror It doesu't pay to stick your nose Into other people's business unless you art a lawyer. In a quarrel, the one that gets th worst of tt Is the first t becom raeaa. my job is to be permanent r "Well," returned the emplover vou can stay as long as you please". That's fair, isn't It?" -mats "Certainly. Im much ob " "On the niW V.O t - i,ht t ; :.:;"ouu' 4 re8 the .--. u,rge you whenever I Please. That's equally fair. isn-t ,t? 1 le-es, I suppose Bo."-fh!. herself; tnat will make it right neither of you out Do you see?" "Oh, how nice!" they both exclaim ed, and when the conductor came round they did what the old meddler sug gested. Both then sat nleased and magnanimoug looking until the end of the ride. use. The more a boy expects the less n taenia to acquire. - -