The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, July 20, 1900, Image 4

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SHIM II II I ' " ' ' I UN HI I . " " I Mil II ' " -
, ' - 1 J 1 ' 1 "
Vancouver Iron and Big Oregon Company are
the Current Talk This Week.
Fennaylvanla Man Said to lie Buying
for IJeelopinent.
Seattle, July 16. Tlie Post-Intelligencer
states that managers of the
McKeesport iron works, in Pennsyl
vania, have been visiting the Pacific
coast, and have secured sites for new
iron works at Port Angeles, after an
unsuccessful attempt to locate in Vic
toria, B. C. The belief is expressed
that the iron deposits of Vancouver
inland have attracted the attention of
these iron men and that raw iron will
be taken from Bnrclay sound, and else
where in the island, down to Port An
geles for working. It is known that
the McKeesport iron men have secured
options on three properties in the Barc
lay sound oountry, namely the Ander
son Company, another owned by Wil
son, Uraden, Irving and others, and a
third the property of Thompson, Ura
den, Logan and Kaina. An option has
been secured on these claims until the
end of the year, and before the begin
ning of next month between 400 and
500 men will be taken up to Barclay
sound to exploit its mineral wealth.
x. uo,.uF..,.
properties are at all equd t P rem-
ise, it will mean much for ancouver
If development proves that those
island and for Victoria. The proper
ties in question run about 72 per cent
in pig iron, a very high per ceutage,
and one which nnvoked enthusiastic
expressions from the visiting magnates.
From these the raw material for the
Port Angeles foundries will be drawn.
The Galena, one of the promising
claims on the Gordon river, paused re
cently under bond to a numberof East
ern capitalists. Active work will com
mence on this mine on August 1 and
will be continued until the end of the
year. A large sum is involved in this
transaction should it go through.
Owneri Want a Showing
Made In the
Hard Cash.
Greenood, B. C, July 16. The own
ers have bonded the IlnrdCash mineral
claim for $30,000 to John Kodgers.
The bond is a working one, and so
much work must be made before the
first payment is made. The Hard Cash
li a fractional claim, containing 28
acres, adjoining the Golden Crown,
Winnipeg and the J. and R. The lat
ter claim is owned by John fludgers,
and he recently uncovered a ledge on
the property neur the Hard Cash line.
He, therefore, secured the Hard Cai-h
that both claims might be worked to
Thirty-five Million Buiheli Sent From
Portland, Man Franolioo, Seat
tle and Tacoma.
Portland, July 16. The Oregonian
publishes tables showing the wheat
shipments from the four leading toast
cities for the seuson of 1809-1000, us
From Portland 04 cargoes, 14,239,
004 bushels.
From Sau Francisco 127 cargoes,
13, 584.035 bushels.
Fiom Seattle and Tacoma 35 car
goes, 7,799,003JusheU.
Biz Months of Thla Year Equal to All
of Last.
liossland, B. C, July 18. Ore ship
ments from this district for the flint
half of 1900 were nearly equal to those
of the wljole year 1897, when the fig
ures were 73,840 tons. The total for
the past six months is 71,235 tons.
The Mokel Plate has lieun opeued tn
the 600-foot lovel, is fully developed
by drifts, etc., to the 200-foot level,
and partially developed to the 400-foot
level. Arrangements have beeu made
to ship 250 tons of ore per day from
the Nickel Plate.
Twenty-three' Times fluid Hal
Struck at Palmar. '
Loomls, Wash., July 16. In the
Palmer mountain tunnel the last 30
feet driven has gone through a forma
tion highly mineralized, giving assays
each day running from $3.74 to $37 in
gold. The last shot at the face broke
into a well defined ledge, showing
much blue quarts full of mineral which
may prove one of the most important
in the history of the tunnel. This
ledge is in a different formation from
that of the other 22 and the good valuta
pieceeding the cuttings of the foot wall
make the crossing and testing of this
23d vein a matter of special interest.
Haohtnery Weigh Nearly
Million round!.
Anaoonda, Mont., July 16. New
machinery weighing 1,650,000 pounds
is being installed in the concentrating
plant of the Anaconda Mining Com
pany here. The company is using 24
Huntington mills five feet in diameter,
of the latest pattern; 24 sets of crush
ing rolls, 40 inches in diameter by 16
inch face, with forged steel shells;
eight Blake crushers, 24x13 inches, and
16 Blake crushers 15x5 inches.
Copper and Gold Produced at the Cop
per Cliff.
Missoula, July 16. Visitors in the
city from the Copper Clitf miue report
the shaft down 200 feet and the ore
running high grade. The owners ex
pect to drift at this depth and find bet
ter ore. There is on the dump about
$35,000 worth of ore, running in both
gold and copper.
Wallace Heporta Two Recently Incor
porated, Moderately Slocked.
Wallace, Idaho, July 16. The Nov
elty Mining & Milling Company, limit
ed, baa illed articles of incorporation.
Its principal place of business is Wal
lace, and its capital stock of $20,000
is divided into 200,000 shares.
The Capitol Mining & Milling Com.
pany has tiled articles of incorpoiation.
Wallace is the principal place of bu si
new, and the capital stock of $100,000
is divided into 1,000,000 shares.
Mine In the Bonanza District to Be
City, Ore., July 16. The
Belle and Gold Boy Consoli-
lated Mining Company has been incor
porated with a capital stock of $2,000,
000. The president of the company is
Albert Geiser, of Bonanza fame; vice
president, Clark Tabor, of the Red Boy,
treasurer, J. T. Donnelly, cashier of
the First National bank; secretary,
Eugene Sperry; manager, F. J.Conroy;
consulting engineer, Captain C. II.
The property is located in the Bo
nanza district, and is ronsidered to be
a very rich and promising mine. It is
the intention of the company to push
development work and get a mill on
the property at once.
Much Good May Keault From the Holm
Heating In 1901
Spokane, July 16. In view of the
fact that the next meeting of the In
ternational Mining Congress will meet
in Boise, Idaho, in July, 1901, some of
the events that took place last month
Milwankee wi be in,
vMtl, " nW ,.
last month
terestinu to Northwestern mininir men.
says the Spokesman-Review.
I The objects aimed at by the Milwau
' kee meeting were:
First A .permanent organization.
Second A revision of the national
mining laws, with a view of the better
protection of claimants and owners of
mineral lands.
Third A mineral exhibit.
Fourth To obtain and disseminate
information regarding improvements
and Inventions of labor saving machin
ery and other mining appliances.
The permanent organization consisted
of 416 registered delegates lepresenting
23 different states.
Mineral exhibits were displayed by
Alaska, Colorado, Wisconsin, New
Mexico, Montana, Arizona, Canada,
Idaho, Washington and Oregon.
Oold Mining In British Colombia.
The first authenticated discovery of
gold in British Columbia, according to
Dr. G. M. Dawson, occurred at Mitch
ell or Gold Harbor, on the west coast
of Queen Charlotte island, in 1851, a
nugget weighing several ounces having
been accidentally picked up by an
Indian woman on the seashore. This
nupget wag brought to Fort Simpson,
and, coming into the possession of the
officer in charge of the Hudson Bay
Company's poHt at that place, was for
warded by him to the company's head
quarters at Victoria. An expedition
was at once fitted out, and, proceeding
to the spot, succeeded in locating a
quartz vein seven inches wide, "report
ed to contain 25 per cent gold in some
places." The find was worked for
some months and then abandoned, the
nnrrow vein entirely giving out; no
other indications of mineral were ever
found on the island, notwithstanding
that this extraordinary little seam ol
quartz had yielded in a few weeks it
was worked a value of $20,000 on the
woid of one authority, or $75,000 on
that of another. About the same time
coal, which had been discovered on
Vancouver island as far back as 1835,
began to be miuud in earnest at Nanai
mo. Suit. Over Mining Claims.
Vancouver, Wash., July 16. The
ease of Adolph Hooper and Victor Carl
son againnt J. G. Copely and U. M.
Lauman was on trial before a special
jury, called for this case, in the super
ior court. The case relates to the
rights of the parties to certain mining
claims iu the St. Helens mlulng dis
trict, in Skamania county. The suit
was first brought in Lewis county, and
was transferred to Skamania county,
where the property in controversy is
located. The trial was held in this
county to suit the convenience of the
parties to the action. Since the com
mencement of the action, the defend-
J ant, J. G. Copley, died, and Charles
W. Thompson, administrator of his es
tate, was substituted as a party defend
ant, New Oregon Mining Companies.
The Elk Creek Gold Mining Com
pany, city of Union, $50,000.
The Lillian Gold Mining and Invest
ment Company, Baker City, $500,000.
Keystone, Belle and Gold Boy Con
solidated Mining Company, Baker Citv,
New Washington Mining Companlet.
Gold Ledge Consolidated Mining &
Milling Company, Spokane, $100,000.
Sacramento Gold Miuiug Company,
Spokane, $100,000.
Pilgrim Gold Mining & Milling
Company, Davenport, $100,000.
Golden Era Mining Company, Col
ville, $75,000.
Consolidated Gold Mining Company,
Republic, $1,500,000.
Myitis Mining & Milling Company,
Tacoma, $500,000.
Bald Mountain Mining Company,
Clear Lake, $1,000,000.
Galena King Mining & Milling Com
pany, Ropublic, $75,000.
The riainvew, Or., creameiy turned
out 10,000 pounds of butter the past
The city treasurer of Fairhaven,
Wash., has just called in $5,300 of
The necessary acreage is pledged to
secure a starch factory at liubler, in
Union county.
Spokane lawyers have agieed to close
their offices at noon each Saturday dur
ing July and August.
The Stay ton, Or., creamery paid 17
cents for butter fat its first month, and
18 cents last month.
Port Townsend's school directors
have re-established the office of city
superintendent of schools.
A young man named Arthur Dunn
lost his right leg at Starbuck, Wash.,
on the 9th by attempting to board a
moving train.
In every home yon will find at least
a half dozen skin lotions and toilet
articles on a girl's dressing table, and
a boy with hands chapped and bleed
Improvement of Tone, Bather Than of
Bradstreet's says: While trade is
itili only of mid-summer volume, the
beginnings of improvement in demands
ire apparently becoming visible, lhe
Improvement ia still one of tone, rather
than of demand, but with a yield of
540.000.000 bushels of wheat, a next
to record breaking yield of corn, and a
very large proirtion of osts.Jthe West
trn crop situation contains many en
couraging features. The Southern cot
ton crop has undoubtedly suffered, and
conditions are unprecedented ly low
for this season of the year, but the
acreage planted was a large one, and
prices are so much higher that a satis
factory financial return is confidently
looked for.
The effort of the big iron and steel
concerns to control prices, it reauy
made, has proven abortive, and another
wholesale slashing of quotations is to
be reported this week.
The industrial situation is rather bet
ter as a result of agreements upon wages
by a number of iron and steel manu
facturing concerns and their employes.
Lower prices for lumber are appar
sntly inducing more activity in build
ing, though how much is due to this or
bow much to the settlement of labor
disturbances is hard to measure.
Wheat, including flour, shipments
for the week aggregate 2,829,910 bush
sis, against 3,018,833 bushels last
Business failures in the United States
umber 221 as compared with 140 last
Business failures in the Dominion of
Canada number 23 as compared with
25 last week.
Ninety persons were made seriously
ill at Rheine, Westphalia, Germany,
owing to the eating of diseased horse
R cattle Marketa.
Onions, new, lKc
Lettuce, hot house, $1 per orate.
Potatoes, new. lc.
Beets, per sack, 85c$l.
Turnips, per sack, 75o.
Carrots, per sack, $1.00
Parsnips, per sack, 60 75c.
Cauliflower, native, 75o.
Cucumbers 5060o.
Cabbage, native and California,
$1.00 1.25 per 100 pounds.
Tomatoes $1.25.
Butter Creamery, 23c; Eastern 22c;
dairy,-17022c; ranch, 1517o pound.
Eggs 24o.
Cheese 12o.
Poultry 14c; dressed, 14 15c;
spring, $3.50.
Hay Puget Sound timothy, $11.00
12.00; choice Eastern Washington
timothy, $19.00.
Corn Whole, $23.00; cracked, $23;
feed meal, $23.
Barley Rolled or ground, per ton,
Flour Patent, per barrel, $3.50;
blended straights, $3.25; California,
$3.25; buckwheat flour, $6.00; gra
ham, per barrel, $3.00; whole wheat
flour, $3.00; rye flour, $3.804.00.
Millstuffs Bran, per ton, $18.00;
shorts, per ton, $14.00.
Feed Chopped feed, $19.00 per ton;
middlings, per ton, $20; oil cake meal,
per ton, $30.00.
Fresh Meats Choice dressed beef
steers, price 7 Mo; cows, 7c; mutton 8c;
pork, 8c; trimmed, 9c; veal, 9
11c. ,
Hams Large, 18c; small, 18;
breakfast bacon, 13)c; dry salt sides'
8c. .
Portland Market.
Wheat Walla Walla. 655Go;
Valley, 60c; Bluestem, 69c per bushel.
Flour Best grades, $3.20; graham,
$2.70; superfine, $2.10 per barrel.
Oats Choice white, 85c; choice
gray, 83o per bushel.
Barley Feed barley, $14.0015.00;
brewing, $16.00 per ton.
Millstuffs Brau, $12.50 tou; mid
dlings, $19; shorts, $13; chop, $14 pet
Hay Timothy. $1011; clover,$7
7.50; Oregon wild hay, $67 per tou.
Butter Fancy creamery, 85 40c,
store, 25c.
Kggs 17,lo per dozen.
Cheese Oregon full cream, 13c;
Young America, 14c; uew cheese lOi
per pound.
Poultry Chickens, mixed, $3.00(r
8.50 per dozen; hens, $4.5ti; spring
$2.003.50; geese, $4.00(a5.00 lor old
ft. 50(0. 60; ducks, $3.0O(t$4.00 per
dozen; turkeys, live, 14(s15e pe)
Potatoes 40 50c per sack; sweets,
2240 per pouuu.
Vegetables Beets, $1; turnips, 75c;
per sack4, garlic, 7o per pound; Vali
bage, lso per pound; parsnips, $1;
onions, lo per pound; carrots, $1.
Hops 28o per pound.
Wool Valley, 1616o per pound;
Eastern Oregon, 1015o; mohair, 26
per pound.
Mutton Gross, best sheep, wethen
and ewes, 3 '40; dressed mutton, 7
7)o per pound; lambs, 6H0-
llogs Gross, choice heavy, $5.00;
light and feeders, $4.50; dressed,
$5.00 6.50 per 100 pounds.
Beef Gross, top steers, $4.00 4.60;
cows, $3.50 4.00; dressed beef, 6K
7?i'o per pound.
Veal Large, 6g7)go; small, 8
8 o per pound.
San rraneiaeo Market.
Wool Spring Nevada, 1315cpei
pound; Eastern Oregon, 10 16o; Val
ley, 1820c; Northern, 10 12c.
Hops 1899 crop, ll13o pel
Butter Fancy creamery 13 19c;
do seconds, lSJsc; fancy dairy,
17o; do seconds, 15 19 o per pound.
Eggs Store, 15o; fancy ranch,
Millstuffs Middlings, $17.00
20.00; bran, $13.50 13.50.
. Hay Wheat $6.50 10; wheat and
oat $6.00 9.50; best barley $5.00
7.00; alfalfa, $5.00 6.00 per ton;
straw, 25 40o per bale.
Potatoes Early Rose, 60 65c; Ore
gon Burbanks, 80c 90; river Bur
banks, 35 (i 65c; new. 70c $1.25.
Citrus Fruit Oranges, Valencia,
$2.763.25; Mexican limes, $4.00
8.00; California lemons 75c $1.50;
do choiee $l.753.00 per box.
Tropical Fruits Bananas, $1.60
1.50 per bunch; pineapples, nom
inal; Persian dates, 66io per
eat and Sleep Under One Roof,
and the Gift of
XfnnndKTllle. W. Vs.. Is the headauarters of the sect called "Holiness People.'
They recently held a great religious feast. Many hundreds of the sect came from
all parts of the world. The church originated in Michigan in 1880, and the head
quarters were moved to Moundsvllle two years ago. They believe that God's
people are coming to unity; that this is a reformation of the Christian religion,
and that the true Christians of the world are being turned by God to this belief.
They believe In sanctification by faith and divine healing.
The congregations', called the "Church of the Living God" or "Hollaess
People," are very economical. They wear no neckties or clothing of fashionable
design. The men all wear white shirts and celluloid collars, with bone collar but
tons, and no jewelry is worn. Everything is in communal style. They are all
quartered In the Trumpet Home. At this Home the single people have rooms of
their own and the families have suites. There is but one kitchen and one dining
room. These people do not mingle with the outside world, and apparently are
a very happy and contented set. They have a publishing house of their owb, aad
a paper called the Gospel Trumpet. No one working on this journal gets any
Bulury, as the motto of these people is that ail persons need is "enough to eat and
their clothing." -
Curious Affliction of Those Who Delve
in Mi uea and Tunnels.
There is a disease which attacks the
laborers in tunnels and mines. It Is as
old as Egypt, but only within this cen
tury has It been placed to a specific
parasite. It Is a painful and danger
ous disease, often resulting in death.
A monograph on the subject of this
malady, called ankylostomiasis, has
Just appeared, and, coming as It does
from Hugo F. Goldman, M. D., the of
ficial physician In the coal mines of
Brennbeig, near Oldenburg, Germany,
It carries great weight, for It Is based
upon years of experience and practical'
treatment of this dread disease.
It attacks not only men but animals,
especially the horses or mules used In
the building of tunnels and the opera
tion of mines. It is a disease caught by
Ir.ectlon, like typhoid or cholera. It
may be contracted In the air or by con
tact with the germs, which are really
the eggs of the little worm, or ankylos
toma. as it Is called. This name means
"hooked mouth," and refers to the six
hooked teeth around the mouth of the
parasite by which it clings to the inte
rior of the human intestine. It is found
not only In the duodenum, but also in
the smaller intestines, where it grows
and flourishes.
Male and female can be distinguished
among these parasites, the females be
ing larger and more numerous than the
males. The males grow to the length
of .3037 Inch, and the female is on an
average half as long again. They can
be seen with the naked eye. This ani
mal has neither breathing apparatus
nor circulatory system, and varies In
color from grayish white to brown and
even blood red, according to the condi
tion of the person in whom it is found.
The female lays a large number of eggs
In the human intestines, from which
they spread the disease infinitely under
proper conditions. The parasite and
the egg develop best in a temperature
between 65 and 85 degrees Fahren
heit The air and surrounding medium
should be moist. It Is on account of
the moisture and heat to be found In
mines and tunnels that this parasite
develops so perfectly among the toll
ers in these places. Darkness is also
necessary, sunlight kllliug these anl
malculne almost instantly.
Ankylostomiasis originated in the
Orient It has been long established In
Egypt but has been mistakenly called
Egyptian chlorosis, or aenemla, and
was treated as mere poverty of the
blood In red corpuscles. It passed over
from Egypt to Italy, where It was not
really understood until Dublnl found
the parasite tn 1838.
When the St Gothard tunnel was
built in the '70s. the disease spread
throughout central Europe, especially
In Switzerland, 'lhe further spread
lug of the ankylostoma to the mines of
Europe was quick to follow. When the
men were first attacked In the St Got
hard tunnel It was thought that a new
disease, the "tunnel disease," had been
found, but It was nothing other than
the ankylostoma, as was proved by
1'erronclto, when he found no less than
1,500 of these parasites in the duode
aim of a man who had died of "tun
n;l disease." a
The mode of Infection Is very ap
parent The men while at work often
tarry their hands to their mouths, or
eat their food in the tunnels or mines,
and in this way the parasite or its eggs
enter through the mouth, pass on into
the system and find a permanent home
in the Intestines, to the walls of which
they cling with all six teeth, feeding
on the blood of the unfortunate person
t'ae of Boap.
British critics of the Boers are fond
of asserting that the sturdy Transvaal
era use little soap. This may be true
Believe in ancu.;au .
Divine Healing-.
or not. Even If true, there is plenty
of precedent. The Japanese, the most
cleanly people In the world, rarely use
soap. The Russians use vapor baths for
cleanliness' sake. Rough Inside cloth
ing cleanses the skin. There are doc
tors who have cured skin diseases by
insisting upon their delicate patients
abandoning silk underwear and using
very coarse stuff instead.
Napoleon, whose hands were good to
model and beautifully white, used bran
and lemon juice, and no soap, unless to
shave. In England, on account of coal
smoke and smut, soap is more needed
than in countries with clear air. Many
fashionable ladles of to-day, who
would be much offended if they were
ealled barbarous or uncivilized, never
use soap. They grease themselves with
vaseline and such stuff and carefully
rub it all off again. San Francisco
Call. '
Stole the Bridegroom.
A young man In a convivial party at
a Broad street hotel told the following
story: "t naa a good time at a wedding
last week. It was the wedding of a
friend of mine, and I and some of the
boys played a good Joke on him, and
he didn't get mad either. The Joke was
to steal him. Yes, right after the cere
mony we grabbed him up, banged him
Into a cab, and then drove him out six
teen miles Into the country, where we
locked him up in a barn and kept him
there three days. The bride waited for
him in a royal suite of rooms In an As-
bury Park hotel. We had persuaded
her to travel down alone, promising her
the groom would arrive at any minute.
Every evening, after our day's work
was done, we trotted out Into the coun
try to see the groom, with baskets of
food and liquid. Pretty good-natured
about It the duffer was, too, I tell you
though, those three days were different
slightly from what he and the girl had
been counting on." Philadelphia Rec
Not Law but, Gospel.
Clergymen of the past often had
traits of Individuality which are per
haps not so common at the present day.
Archbishop Sumner was once holding
a eonnrmation in an English tjarlsh
church, when he observed that a num-
ber of peoplj were standing in the
aisies, aunougn several pews were
empty. He stopped the service, and
askea the reason,
"The pews are private property," an
swered a man, "and they're shut on."
"There can be no such thing," said
the bishop, authoritatively. "Let the
pews be opened."
"We can't open 'em!" shouted some
one. "There re locked."
"Is there a locksmith here?"
"Yes, my lord."
"Very well; let him remove the locks.
A hymn shall be sung meanwhile."
So the locks were removed, the audi
enee seated itself, and the confirmation
went on. Youth's companion,
Water at Hamburg.
One of the tasks of the Hamburg
Hygienic Institute Is to make frequent
examinations of the water of the river
Elbe to see if it contains the germs of
cholera, diphtheria, or other Infectious
diseases. Another is to examine the
water of the wells, of which there still
are 2,000 in the city.
After a woman has been married two
years, she should give up trying to get
her husband to say voluntarily that he
Is fond of ber.
The Blonde I wish 1 could play the
piano, awfully. The Brunette Why,
you can. .ew ior world.
A good boy may not become a hand
some man, but a handsome bonnet al
ways becomes a good woman.
RIOUS HUiwwn''-
- ..
. Tacineaia - -
World 0ar-Baylgs -
to Old or Toung-JT -
tl... that To. Will EJ.
Maud-I don't know whether Charley
really loves me or not.
Her brother-What am ju ;
for a birthday present?
"A box of cigars.
'Did he smoke them?"
"Yes." . .. ,,
Then you may be sure he loves you.
-Stray Stories.
Tnn ntrrnunua.
"Dis Is a mighty busy world," said
tha nhllosoDhlC hoDO. iav '
ioke." returned his companion. "Its
elttln' ter be harder worn icr
from workln' dan it is ter work."-Phll
adelphla Record.
Policeman (examining broken win
dow) Begorra, but It s more sarious
thin OI thought It was. It's broke on
both sides! Punch.
An Illuminating Question.
He She must be from Chicago.
She What leads you to think so?
He I overheard him ask her how
long she had ever been single at one
time. The Smart Set.
. Pro and Con.
"I tell you what," said the enthusl
aet, "the people who play golf have
about them a certain individuality
When you know that a man is a devo
tee of the game you can form a prompt
estimate of his mental caliber."
"Oh, I wouldn't say that!" replied
the other. "I know several who occa
slonally play and they're not fools, by
any means."
All In the Accent
Shopper How much Is that there
Dealer That's $1.00.
Second shopper (a moment later)
What is the price of this vawse?
Dealer That vawse, madam, Is $5,
It will look splendid in a Louls-Qua
torze cabinet.
Second shopper I'll take It
Happily Overfreighted.
"Why did that foreign actor make his
farewell speech sitting down?"
"Perhaps his pockets were so full of
money he couldn't stand up."
Prompt Irregularity.
"Is your new cook reliable?"
"Thoroughly so. wnen she savs
breakfast will be ready at 7 o'clock
sharp we know we needn't get down
stairs until 8:15."
Keeping His Word.
Emil. vou said VOllM mat m- -
riage a heaven for me, and now jou
won't even buy me a silk dress!"
"But, my dear, did you ever hear of
people wearing silk dresses In heaven?"
uas Kleine Witzblatt
Hard to Find.
jemenentyr exclaimed Farmer
uanx, as he dropped his paDer
reckon thieves must be kind 0' skeerce
aown to the city."
"Xeow, what In the name 0' foodneso
put sleh an idee Into your head, Josh'
way?" asked his better half.
Some feller put an advertlsempnt in
the paper for one," replied the old man
an, whats more, he offered $10 re
ward fer any Information leadin' to the
uisKivery 0 one."
The Mean Thin.
Miss A-When I'm asked tn Etn t
don't say, "No, I can't sing," nor wait
to be coaxed, but I sit right down at the
piano and
Miss B-Leave it to the comnon,
And it out for themselves.
Not Invited.
Daughter-Shall we invite Dr
to the reception? s
Mother-I think we'd better not; he's
to absent-minded. He might charge it
in the bill-New York Weekly.
An Old Crae Modernised.
nussy uas got a lovelv
string." '
"A button strinjrr
. ' boys the knows."
a ri. ..a i .!.
" "a Tom.
nrfl. Rnv Plnaaa mim
illj iauuiu a aniui ail&.
Employer-No, Jerry, pm golnt
game myself.
Abaorbed in Hla Own Labor Trov
"Well, our labor troubles seem tt
winding up."
Yes; my wife said last nieht
t k all ilAtia Imt An
tne oaca uuu.
lMrt Vnil will noira. V,
mw ..... u.ic4 ue a lopt
man, my aear. 1011 are too heav
v. t . .1 Tl A T A1 1 . .
leutiy nonsensical ana unlntellieM, J
the reception to-day. ' I
Wife Ye-es, but you were to J
eouucious aDout it. The Smart Set
a ... . . .
There Are Other.
Weary Watklns I see by the dih
that the Prince of Wales Is looked m;
by the police all the time.
Hungry Hlgglns Yes, an' he hp,
works, neither. I guess we ain't 1
only ones. Indianapolis Press!
Late in Life.
Bray I cut my wisdom teeth
irold dollar.
Jay I cut mine on a gold brict
Baltimore American.
Cannibalistic Courtesy,
King Umbaloolo (to newly arri
missionary's wife) Ah, Mrs.UoodWj
we are giaa to see you. Though
are far from the refining Influence
society, I assure you that there
times when we are positively hut
for a woman.
Like many of her sex, she lost
head after this complluieut-Bai
more American.
Census Taker What is
your !
Mrs. Neighbors Did the woman nei
door give her age?
Census Taker Certainly.
Mrs. Neighbors Well, I'm two year
younger than she is. Chicago Newt
Never Changes.
Ida There goes "Circus" McCarthy
May Why do you call him "CIrcm
Ida No matter when you see hlmt
Is always the same.
. In the Restaurant.
Mrs. Crawfoot Hiram, you alwan
did have such a poor taste in regard t
Mr. Crawfoot Oh, I dunno, Manij
I reckon I can tell the good old hoit
made catsup from this blamed ttej
Small Favors.
"I cannot tell you what pleasure jot
have given me by making me a blrtk
day present of these two vases! Ever?
time I saw them in the show wlndon
of the ten-cent store I wished to po
sess them!" Fllegende Blaetter.
- One Rule.
"Do yaw undawstand football, to
baw?" inquired the college youth.
"Well, when I shave you I generally
touch down," responded the knight of
the razor.
Backyard Botany.
"So you are experimenting In botany! j
Well, Curtis, remember that 'what yon
sow you shall also reap.' "
"Well, Tabler, that rests with youi
neighbor's chickens."
Her Instrument.
"Does Miss Giddy play?" asked Prof.
Dalsegno of Mr. Hunker.
"Oh, yes. She's playing young GUI'
lowhlll now."
The Bame Thing;.
"I'm sorry we haven't much of a din
ner," said Spatts to Bloobumper, wboia
lie had urged to stay for that meal
"You ought to have dropped In tail
evening. We had a stunning dinner
"Why, papa," chirped Sammy SpatH
"that's Just what you told Mr. TaddelU
at dinner yesterday." '
For Resumption.
Tramp Gimme a dimej mister?
Philanthropist (suspiciously) Xon'n
been drinking, haven't you?
Tramp (meekly) Yes, sir, and l'
broke. I want the dime to resume busi
ness with at the old stand."
Plenty of Elbow Room.
Ranchman's wife Drive over and
bring our daughter in. You'll hare to
hurry, because supper will be ready U
an hour.
Ranchman Wrhere is she?
Ranchman's wife She's swinging on
the front gate.
A Dream that Came True.
"Talking about dreams," said Mr
Smith, as we sat around the fire, say
the San Francisco Chronicle, "1 one
had a very strapge experience. I
dreamed that I was just stepping oat
of my house for a walk, when a funeral
passed by. A man with a cap marked
nine and a red scar running across his
forehead jumped from the hearse, and,
approaching me, asked: 'Are y0
ready?" 'No,' 1 replied, and with thai
I awoke.
"A few months later I was stopping
In Chicago. I was in the top floor ol
one of "the big houses and just abonl
to step into the elevator, when I w
membered another thing I wanted t
buy. ' I stopped and looked through mJ
notebook. 'Downr exclaimed the el
vator boy, and then asked me: 'A"
you ready T 'No,' I answered and tb
door closed.
"The next instant a great crash w
heard, and, the occupants of the ele
vator were dashed to an untimel;
death. .
"The cap of the boy bore the nam
ber nine and he had a red scar rui
ning across his brow."