ALASKA. BOUNDARY.
Caltad States and Brltlih Surveyor to
Establish the Line Named in the
Modus Ylvendl.
- The American members of the inter
national commission appointed to sur
vey and mark oat the Alaska boundary
line at Lynn canal, nnder the modos
vivendi, arrived in Seattle from Wash
ington, and wil proceed to Victoria,
where they will meet the two British
members of the commission. The
American menmbers are C. II. Tilman,
assistant superintendent of the United
States coast and geological survey, and
his assistant, O. B. French. They are
gathering statistics and information
here concerning the matter they have
in hand. Mr. Tiilman said it would
requite probably two months to com
plete the survey. The line will be
marked with the usual monuments,
stakes, etc On Chilkoot and White
passes, monuments of a permanent char
acter will be set op, so that there may
be no possible dispute at these points
as to the exact location of the line.
"We are simply to ascertain the lo
cation and mark out for the guidance
of all persons the line established by
the modus vivendi between England
and the United States," said Mr. Til
man. "This line was agreed to in Oc
tober, 1899, after several months of ne
gotiation. It is by no means a per
manent or established boundary line
beyond the terms and life of the modus
vivendi. Our work will be necessarily
technical and not diplomatio, although
we are operating nnder the direction,
in this instance of the department of
M state, at Washington. The distance to
be surveyed is about 25 miles."
Mr. Tilman expeots to begin active
work in the field about June 15. He
and Mr. French will meet the Cana
dian commissioners at Victoria. They
are W. F. King and J. L. Mc Arthur.
A party of about 12 men will be taken
along to a's&lst in the field work. The
expenses of the. survey are to be shared
equally by the twj) countries.
Northwatt Not.
State Senator Charles W. Fulton, of
Astoria, Or., has accepted the invita
tion extended to him to deliver the
Fourth of July oration in Pendleton.
The warehouses at The Dalles, have
already received about 1,500,000
pounds of wool, and it is pouring in
rapidly from all points of the'eompass.
The good road from Sumpter to Gran
ite will be constructed nnder the direc
tion of E. J. Godfrey. It will cost
$5,000 or $6,000 and will be a credit
to that section.
The $1,000 bond issued by the Ham
ilton school district, Grant County,
Or., commanded a premium of $12.
The bond bears 6 per cent interest and
is payable in 20 years.
William E. McClure, formerly of
Eugene, and a University of Oregon
alumnus, will be graduated this year
"from the department of law, Columbia
university, Washington, D. O.
What are the Oregon boys coming to?
asks the Albany Democrat. John G.
Hammond, a Europe young man, is do
ing the villain in a "Sapho" company
doing the New England states.
J. T. Roriok last week cut a field of
rye on the old Frank Taylor place
cross the river from The Dalles, Or.,
that averaged in height six feet and
eight inches. Mr. Rorick says it beat
any rye crop he ever saw.
A new tube boilor has been sent down
to Seaside, Or., to replace the large one
now being used by the saw mill there.
A 7,000 gallon water tank is being
erected by the company near the box
factory, and will afford ample protec
tion in case of fire.
Day Bros, have commenced work on
their saw mill at Cascade Locks, and,
when completed, it will saw 00,000
feet a day. They will get their logs on
the other side of the rivei, one log
ging camp being near Stevenson, and
another will be put in at Wind river.
The prospeot of a large crop of mel
ons in Yakima county, Wash., is not
as bright as might be desired. The
seeds having rotted, necessitates re
planting, and the cool spell has not
helped to develop a healthy growth; it
is predicted the corp will be short and
prices high.
The experiments that have been car
ried on by the O. R. & N. with brome
grass and on the arid lands in the vi
cinity of Telosaste, south of Union, Or.,
have shown that the new grass will
grow luxuriantly on the dry and al
most barren hills. A considerable
quantity of seed will be sown this year.
The steamer Signal was chartered by
the Pioneer Western Timber Company
for Cape Nome, and the vessel left
South Bend for that point. J. D. Dyer
is manager of the enterprise. It is
proposed to start a lumber yard at
Nome and supply it from South Bend
or Knappton. A part of the cargo con
sisted of 400,000 feet of lumber for
buildings and sluce boxes.
Fire broke out in the dry kiln of the
Addison mill plant at Tacoma last
week. The firemen confined the fire
to tha building in which it originated,
but hi that building contained the ma
chinery, the mill will have to shut
down for repairs. The loss is $15,000,
while the insurance is but $4,500, leav
ing a net loss of $10,500. The com
pany will rebuild at once.
II. J. Snively, J. H. Visslers and J.
M. Baxter, have leased 1,200 acres of
land on Toppenish creek, eight miles
from Toppouish station, in Yakima
county, Wash., and have seeded 400
acres to wheat, 90 to millet, 10 to field
peas, S00 to barley and 850 to oats. It
is their intention Inter on to engnge in
dairying and stoekraising and most of
the land will be devoted to timothy.
They have contracts with the Indian
owners of the land for a 10 years'
lease, and believe tho contracts are
binding.
Jack Salisbury and A. B. Chapman
brought into Pendleton recently, 1,500
wethers which were sold to Howard,
a buyer from St. Paul. The sheep were
shipped via the W. C. R. and North
ern Pacific roads, and will be taken to
UXj Hi uutaua inuus s suuiuid
and then shipped on East in the fall.
Mr. Salisbury stated that they received
for the lot $2.65 apiece, which is re
garded as a very good figure.
1 Queen Wilhelmina, of Holland, has
tt minature farm, the products of whieb 1
jo to assist in relieving lb poos.
BRADSTREET'S REVIEW.
Beadjuitwant of Quotations the Lead
ing Feature! of Trad.
Bradstreet's says: Readjustments ol
price quotations to meet the changed
condition of supply and demand an
still the leading feature of the general
trade. In volume the business doing
is of a between-seaeon character, im
provement in some lines being counter
balanced by increased dullness in othei
branches. That the basic conditions ol
the trade are in the main of a favorable
nature, however, is proved by the con
tinued good railroad earnings returni
which come to hand. The fact seemi
to be that the volume of business offer
ed the transportation interests of the
country continues considerably in ex
cess of a year ago. Crop reports are
relatively most favorable as regard!
corn and onta. In the Southwest,
wheat crop prospects are still main
tained at a high average. In the
Northwest wheat has been helped by
late rains, but owing to their late ar
rival it is not certain how much bene
fit was obtained thereby.
The hand-to-mouth domestio demand
for iron and steel continues, but th
number of small orders received it
Southern pig and steel rails note
most inquiry. The situation in tht
pipe market is no better, and plates art
weaker. Concessions of fractions of a
dollar are apparently easily obtainod
for pig iron, but throughout the tradt
the feeling is rather more cheerful, tht
feeling being that lower prices will on
the one hand encourage consumptive
demands, and, on the other hand, tend
to restrict production by less economi
cal plants.
Business faiurea for the week in the
United States number 135, as coin
pared with 167 last week.
PACIFIC COAST TRADE.
Meattla Markets.
Onions, old, 7c; new, 2o.
Lettuce, hot house, 25c doz.
Potatoes, $16(9 17; $17(118.
Beets, per sack, 90c$l.
Turnips, per sack, 40 60c.
Carrots, per sack, $1.
Parsnips, per sack, 60 75c.
Cauliflower, California 90c$l.
Strawberries $2.25 per case.
Celery 40(5) OOo per doz.
Cabbage, native and California,
Tomatoes $2.50 per case.
$1.0031.35 per 100 pounds.
Apples, $2.00 2. 75; $3.003.50.
Prunes, COo per box.
Butter Creamery, 22c; Eastern 22c;
dairy, 1722o; ranch, 1517o pound.
Eggs 19o.
Cheese 1415o.
Poultry 14c; dressed, 14 15c;
spring, $5.
Hay Puget Sound timothy, $11.00
12.00; choice Eastern Washington
timothy, $18.00 19.00
Corn Whole, $23.00; cracked, $23;
feed meal, $28.
Barley Rolled or ground, per ton,
$20.
Flour Patent, per barrel, $3.25;
blended straights, $3.00; California,
$3.25; buckwheat flour, $6.00; era
ham, per barrel, $3.00; whole wheal
flonr, $8.00; rye flour, $3.804.00.
Millstuffs Bran, per ton, $13.00;
shorts, per ton, $14.00.
Feed Chopped feed, $19.00 per ton;
middlings, per ton, $20; oil cake meal
per ton, $30.00.
Fresh Meats Choice dressed bee!
steers, price 8o; cows, 7c; mutton 8o;
pork, 8c; trimmed, 0c; veal, S4
10c.
Hams Large, 13c; small, 1ZK
breakfast bacon, lajjc; dry salt sides,
8c.
Portland Market.
Wheat Walla Walla. 51o;
Valley, 61c; Bluestem, 64o per bushel.
Flour Best grades, $3.00; graham,
$2.50; suporfine, $2.10 per barrel.
Oats Choice white, 80o; choice
gray, 83o per bushel.
Barley Feed barley, $14.0015.00;
brewing, $16.00 per ton.
Millstuffs Bran, $13 per ton; mid'
dllngs, $19; shorts, $15; chop, $14 pel
ton.
Hay Timothy, $1011; clover,$7
7.50; Oregon wild hay, $67 perton.
Butter iancy creamery, 85 40c
seconds, 45o; dairy, 2580o;
store, 25o.
Eggs 1 3 per dozen.
Cheose Oregon full cream, 13o;
Young America, 14c; new cheese 10c
per pound.
Poultry Chickens, mixed, $4.00
4.50 per dozen; hens, $(1.00; sirings,
$2.60 3.60; geese, $6.60 8.00 forold;
$4.50(30.50; ducks, $0.00 7. 00 per
dozen; turkeys, live, 1415o pel
pound.
Potatoes 80 ($550 per sack; sweets,
8s3.Vio per pouua.
Vegetables Beets, $1; turnips, 75c;
per sack; garlio, 7o per pound; cab
bage, Duo per pound; parsnips, $1;
onions, loc per pound; carrot., $1.
Hops 28o per pound.
Wool Valley, 1213o per pound;
Eastern Oregon, 10 15c; mohair, 27
80c per pound.
Mutton Gross, best sheep, wethers
and ewes, 3?4e; dressed mutton, 7
7o per pound; lambs, 6o.
Hogs Gross, choice heavy, $5.00;
light and feeders, $4.50; dressed,
$5.00 6.50 per 100 pounds.
Beef Gross, top steers, $4.004.50;
cows, $3.504.00; dressed beef, 6
7?40 per pound.
Veal Large, 6s780; Bniall, 8
8 J jo per pound.
Tallow 55.!c; No. 3 and grease,
B't4o per pound.
Ban Franoieoo Market.
Wool Spring Nevada, 1416oper
pound; Eastern Oregon, 1015o; Val
ley, 18 20o; Northern, 10 12c.
Hops 1899 crop, ll13o per
pound.
Butter Fancy creamery 1717)o;
do seconds, 16 16 So; fancy dairy,
16c; do seeouds, 1415o per pound.
Eggs Store, 15c; fancy ranch,
17c.
Millstuffs Middlings, $17.00
20.00; bran, $13.50 13.50.
Hay Wheat $6.50(810: wheat and
oat $3.00(39.00; best barley $5.00
7.00; alfalfa, $3.00 7.00 per ton;
straw, 2540o per bale.
Potatoes Early Rose. 60 65c: Ore
gon Burbanks, 70 85c; river Bur
banks, 8565c; new, 70c $ 1.25.
Citrus Fruit Oranees. Valencia.
$3.758.25; Mexican limes, $4.00
5.00; California lemons 75cra$1.50:
do choice $1.752.00 per box.
Tropical Fruits Bananas. $1,600
8.50 per bunch; pineapples, nom
inal; reman dates. 6(36)aO Dei
pound.
ytscience
tggjlvention
The fact that nettle fiber has of late
been found to produce the finest tissues
obtainable from any vegetable source
has led to a project In Germany to In
troduce the cultivation of nettles In the
Ka merlin region of Africa. If the ex
periment Is successful, the enterprise
will be undertaken on a large scale In
connection with the weaving Indus
tries. Among the most remarkable glimpses
Into hidden corners of nature that re
cent scientific advance has afforded are
the frequent discoveries of micro-organisms
in unexpected places, where
they produce phenomena heretofore
supposed to arise from other causes.
For Instance, Dr. A. Pettersen, of Up
sala, Sweden, has ascertained that In
preparations of ment and fish contain
ing, for purposes of preservation, salt
to the amount of 15 per cent, micro
organisms grow luxuriantly, and he
concludes that the flavors and odors
that are peculiar to various salt con
serves ar edue to the micro-organisms
with which they are crowded.
At the latest annual meeting of the
Geological Society of America, Prof. I.
C. Russell called attention to the recent
discovery that many of the swamps
and lakes In the southern peninsula of
Michigan are rich In calcareous marl,
suitable for making Portland cement.
Although partly composed of shells,
the Michigan marl Is principally a
chemical precipitate which is still being
formed. The precise method of Its for
mation Is not yet understood. The sup
ply Is practically Inexhaustible. Large
cement works have lately been con
structed, others are In contemplation,
and Prof. Russell says that Michigan
can easily take a leading place In that
Industry.
In 1893 the Japanese government ap
pointed an Investigating committee on
earthquakes. This committee, which
lias now nearly completed its labors, re
ports, among other things, that It
seems likely that one part or another
of Japan will be visited by a destruc
tlve earthquake once In every two and
a half years. That portion of the land
bordering the Japan Sea is seldom dis
turbed by other than local earthquakes,
while the Taclflc coast of the country
frequently suffers from great shocks
originating under the ocean. When a
region Is shaken by constantly recur
ring small earthquakes, It appears to be
rendered safe against the occurrence of
destructive shocks, becouse the accum
ulatlon of stress In the earth's crust at
that point Is prevented.
Prof. E. H. Barbour, of the Univer
sity of Nebraska, after comparing his
own observations In 1895 with those In
1899, and collecting tho opinions of oth
er visitors to the National Park, ex
presses the fear that within a decade
many of the scenes now most attractive
In the wonderful Yellowstone Valley
will have disappeared. He gives de
tails showing that nearly all the hot
springs and geysers have declined In
activity. "Old Faithful" geyser still
does honor to Its name, but the Interval
between Its eruptions, formerly an
hour, has Increased to 75 or 80 min
utes. Meanwhile there seems to be an
Increase of ebullition In the water of
the greatest of all the geysers, the Ex
celsior, whose outbursts have always
been separated by Irregular periods,
lovering years at a stretch, and there Is
hope that It may be preparing another
exhibition of Its power.
QUAIL-HUNTING IN EGYPT.
Half a Million a Year Ensnared by
Natives.
Much has been said lately of the cap
ture of quail In Egypt, touching the
protest made by Frenchmen against
carrying the birds across French terri
tory for English use. Until this mat
ter rose nobody seemed to know that
quail existed in Egypt, but they do
by the millions.
The passage of bands of quail over
the coast of the delta of the Nile, from
Fort Said to Alexandria, begins in Sep
tember and lasts a month and a half,
the birds arriving in little groups and
alighting on the dunes.
Generally the chaso Is made by means
of nets of five meters high, which the
natives extend on cords fastened to
poles, In the fashion of curtains glid
ing on their rods.
In reality the net Is double. The first
near the side of the sea Is of meshes
very large and loose, but on the back
Is another net where the bird will real
ly come and perch Itself In the folds
formed by this second net of small
meshes. There Is another method of
capture which b more picturesque.
Rows of dried branches are placed on
the shore. At the foot of each branch
is disposed a tuft of fresh herbs, In
tho middle of which is arranged an
opening which ends In a snare. The
quail, tired by Its Journey, takes refuge
in the branch, without figuring to itself
that it Is going to put itself into a trap
where a native will surprise It and kill
It With these perfected means of de
struction, it Is not astonishing that each
year more than half a million of these
poor little birds are taken. St. Louis
Post-Dispatch.
NEW FIND OF FULLER'S EARTH.
Depoatta of Unnsua
1 Purity DlcoveredT ' 1 , ... , ,
arid, 'sweeper who saluted him In military
in Florid
There has lust been brought tn it
near the Ocklockonee River, fourteen iv?
miles west of Tallahassee, Fla.w'uat
Is believed by experts to be one'of the
most wonderful pure veins of fuller's
earth ever discovered In any country.
It Is sa'A to yield, at the expenditure of
very little labor. Immense quantities of
fuller's earth, which stands the 100
test that Is to say, there Is no waste.
Nearly all mines of the kind contain,
besides the valuable commodity, rock,
flint gravel, sand, etc., but this Is abso
lutely free of all such substances.
Fuller's earth Is a soft clay and it has
many uses. Half a century ago It was ,
little mined in England, and was so
valuable there that exportation of It
was prohibited.
.Twelve miles from the place of the
new discovery are two fullers earth
mines that have been worked for a
long time. One Is known as the Ward
mine and the other is owned by the
Standard Oil Company. The product
largely for refining crude olL
Hitherto these two old mines have
regulated the supply and the price of
the article and enormous profits are
said to have been realized from them;
It is estimated that the fuller's earth
found in this new vein can be put on
the market ready for commercial uaea
at one-third the cost possible from any
other mine.
Some of the more Important uses to
which this material Is now put. with
excellent results, are the following:
1. In making baby's powders of
great healing properties for the skin.
2. In refining all kinds of crude oils.
3. For distilling whiskies and brew
ing beer.
4. In the manufacture of all kinds
of vaselines.
6. Packing-houses use It for refining
lards, oleomargarines, butterlnes and
cottolenes. These commodities cannot
be made without the use of fuller's
earth.
6. As a foundation for manufactur
ing all kinds of laundry and -toilet
soaps.
7. A new use recently discovered for
fuller's earth Is that the wool manu
facturers wash old wool with It as it
Is a great absorber of all oils and re
fuse matter found in raw wool.
POCKET SCALE.
Convenient for Physicians, Amateur
1'hntogropliers and Others.
A convenient pocket scale for the use
of physlclins, photographers and oth
ers who require a scale capable of ac
curately weighing small quantities of
drugs, chemicals or other solid sub
stances is here illustrated. As soon as
the box lid Is opened the standard,
which supports the scale beam, Is
thrown Into an upright position by a
spring. This scale beam Is Just loug
enough to go In the box, and the stand
ard is so connected to It that there Is
r-OCKKT SCALE.
no connecting or adjusting of parts
necessary, the scale being ready for
Instant use as soon as the case is open
ed. Another good Idea In this design
Is to have a sliding beam scale, so that
there Is no picking out and manipula
tion of weights, the beam weight be
ing simply adjusted, at the proper point
on the beam to balance the opposite
pan and Its contents, when Its weight
can be read on the scale at once. This
arrangement also secures great stabil
ity, as the box, when opened, forms
the base for the scales, and prevents
their being toppled over when In use.
Naming tho Prince of Wales.
About six hundred years ago there
was a king of Englaud Edward I.
who subdued the people of Wales. Af
ter conquering the Welsh he was anx
ious to get their good-will, and so,
when It happened that his first baby
prince was born In Carnarvon, in
Wales, he had a bright idea. He an
nounced that his boy was a native of
Wales one who could speak Welsh
Just as well as any other tongue (this
was true, as the baby was but a few
weeks old), and he should therefore be
the people's own prince, Edward,
Prince of Wales.
'Twenty-three years after this baby
became King of England, and about
fifty years later his grandson had as
signed to him, as the third Prince of
Wales, the crest and motto which has
been borne by all the English kings'
sons who have since that day had the
title. The crest Is three ostrich feath
ers, and the motto is the sentence, "Ich
dlen" "I serve." It was given to the
Black Prince, a boy of great promise,
who fought bravely at the battle of
Crecy. Forward.
A Thrifty Habit.
"Stinginess is one thing and an ob
servance of excessive nicety In finan
cial details is another," said a Western
man who is worth a good deal of mon
ey. "As an example I will cite a rich
old nnnln T x-w.o hm He was a mill-
.... . .
iou nave oeen
In the Service, my
man?" said he.
"I have thin, yer honner!" replied the
sweeper, in a broad Irish brogue.
"Have you been In any engage
ments?" "Shure I was all through the Crlmaja
war."
"Did you get any wounds?" asked the
officer.
"I was shot through me heart," re
plied the crossing sweeper, without the
slightest hesitation.
"Get along, fellow!" said the officer
Indignantly, assuming that the sweeper
was an impostor, "ir you Had been
shot through the heart you would have
been as dead as a door-nail"'
"But shure, sur," said the man, "me
heart was In me throat at the time!"
The children's Idea of good luck Is to
have their mother prepare for a party,
and a big rain prevent any guests from
co mine
ill
WHERE 'LITTLEMINISTER' LIVED.
Carrie's Home la in Tlirume, the Scene
of Several of Ills Stories.
Mary B. Mullett writing of "The
Real Thrums of Barrie" In the Ladies'
Home Journal, tells of seeing the fa
mous novelist at the railway station Id
Kirriemuir (Thrums) "to which the
family party walked together. Mrs.
Barrie first, a slight figure in brown
and scarlet, more English In dress than
In face, holding her head rather proud
ly and walking confidently she was on
the stage before her marriage. With
her was Miss Barrie, a quietly dressed,
rather colorless woman, not one to draw
attention from the three men who fol
lowed her. The tallest of these three,
the one In ministerial 'black,' a high
hat on his snowy head, was Dr. Ogllvy,
brother to Barrie's mother. The other
white-haired man doubled over, as are
so many In this land of looms, and
wearing great hobnailed shoes, for he
likes to take care of the pretty garden
at the top of the brae was Barrie's
father, Between them was a slight
figure of boyish slenderness. Though
small, he was not dapper, and we
breathed a sigh of relief. As be turn
ed we looked at his face with eager
ness. "It Is a thin, dark face, almost hag
gard; delicate, sensitive, wistful some
how, but stronger than we bad expect
ed it to be. The dominating sadness of
his face makes almost a real shadow
over it He smiled once or twice, but
his face did not once really light up.
But sad and thin as It was, It is a face
that one would not soon forget yes,
and that one would be glad to remem
ber." The Hindu Child-Wife.
A nindu chlld-wlfe divides her yea.
into two Intervals, one of which she
spends with her parents, this being a
sort of vacation time, and the other she
spends at the house of her husband's
parents, this being the time of dally
downright drudgery. Village girls In
Bengal blacken their teeth with mlshl,
a coloring powder. The Hps are black
also, and this is supposed to make them
exceedingly charming.
Writing letters, especially to her hus
band, Is thought to be fearful immod
esty In a Hindu girl; and she has no
chance of Improving her mind by in
telligent conversation with any one.
She must write to her husband, though
she has to do it by stealth In the night
The moon is her lamp, a stick out of
the domestic broom her pen, the Juice
of the puiu berry her ink, and proba
bly the dried leaf of the banana her pa
per. A Hindu girl must always keep
the inner apartment of the house. She
Is only let out when she goes to draw
water for the household either from
the pond or the well or the river.
Hence the waterside is a great femi
nine resort, a sort of women's club,
where there is much gossiping and
plenty of stolen leisure. Christian Reg
ister. How the Young; Elbow the Old.
"The part of wisdom Is not to drop
one's tasks too early, not to be in haste
to retire from posts of Influence and
duty," writes Margaret E. Sangster in
the Ladies' Home Journal. "Insensi
bly the young, with a certain uncon
scious arrogance, elbow the old out of
the way, and monopolize the places in
every profession and branch of busi
ness. Yet the young are not dowered
with experience, nor have they the
riper Judgment of maturity. But they
do have what age has often lost en
thusiasm, self-confidence and pluck.
Old people are sometimes out of touch
with the present age. They have
ceased to be receptive; they have
grown mentally inhospitable and inert
Is there, however, the slightest reason
why a woman should rust out through
mere Indolence before she has done the
full measure of service required by her
Master for the time In which she lives?
As a teacher, as an artist as a house
mistress and mother, in whatever field
yon are, my friend, do not withdraw
from active duty too soon. There Is
need at the front for the woman of
warm heart and trained capacity for
affairs, and her age is of little conse
quence If she Is equal to her work.
There never was a time when the
Judgment of mature age was mora
needed than It is to-day."
A Plea for Tea.
"Nature is, after all, to be depended
upon pretty thoroughly," said a Chi
cago physician who has made a study
of the effects of tea on the system. "For
example, It Is the exceptional person
who craves tea at breakfast a time of
the day at which It is least needed and
Is frequently most Injurious. Tea with
dinner, too, Is not to be recommended,
because even if perfectly made there Is
sure to be a little tannic acid In Its com
position, and the stomach, In attempt
ing the digestion of a heavy meal, Is
much better without this principle.
. "After 5 o'clock, however, the hour
that fashion and custom agree In pro
viding tea, Is an hour that Is also prop
er and lavorablo to the system. Tha
supply of energy, with which the day
was begun Is about exhausted, and a
cup of well-made tea Is often a refresh
ment and tonic that is both acceptable
and desirable." Chicago Chronicle.
He Won't Get Her a Bicycle.
Mr. Wimpley My constant lm in
this .Ife is to do something to make the
world better.
Mrs. Wimpley-Well, you'll do it; I
feel sure of that
Mr. Wlmpley-Ah, Maria, I am glad
that you have for once In your life in
dicated that you have faith In my abil
ity to accomplish something.
Mrs. Wimpley-Yes. you'll die some
day. Then the world will be better.
Chicago News.
Chiaese Widows Seldom Marry.
In China It is the rule of good society
that widows do not remarry. They
are not forbidden to do so, but they are
thought more highly of if they don't
In order to encourage them the govern
ment, when they have passed the age of
50 and have not remarried, confers on
them a tablet containing a eulogy of
their virtues, which they can stick op
over their front door If they like.
It is a pity that the Woman whose
labors begin at dawn, and last all day,
and sometimes all night In caring for a
sick child, has no resource by striking
for an eight-hour law.
Live eagles are as hard to catch at
.those on ear silver dollars.
'OUK BUDGET OF FUN.
HUMOROUS SAYINGS AND DO
INGS HERE AND THERE.
Joke, and Jok.l.t. that Ar.8nppo.ed
to H.t. Been Recently Born-Bayta.
and Doing, that Ar. Old, Cnrlon. .ad
langbabl.-Th. W.ek'. Hnmor.
"Young Sammie Spender Is carrying
out his Governor's wishes faithfully,
isn't he?"
"How's that?"
"Why, the old gentleman left Instruc
tions in his will that after his death
bis dust was to be scattered to the
wlnds."-Llfe.
Fne Did.
"Do you believe In teaching the lan
guages in the schools?" asked Mr.
Clingstone of Miss Glldersleeve.
"Yes, Indeed," replied the young lady,
"every one should be able to speak
English and golf."-Detrolt Free Press.
No Wonder He'. Popular.
"What makes Benedict so popular
among other men, I wonder?"
"Why, he came right out, the other
night, 'and acknowledged that his little
boy never says anything worth repeat
ing "-Philadelphia Bulletin.
A Distinction,
"Miss Flatte Is a beautiful player."
"You mean she plays beautifully."
"No; that's Just what I don't mean."
St Louis Globe-Democrat.
All that Was Necessary.
"Were your amateur theatricals a
success?"
"Oh, yes; every one In them had
friends enough to convince him that
he was the best one of the lot." Phila
delphia Bulletin.
Would Not Suaar-Coat the Pill.
Mrs. Young Don't you believe In
managing one's husband by letting him
think he Is having his own way?
Mrs. Strong Decidedly not! Man
should be made to feel his Inferiority.
Puck.
Pqnelchintt a Gradgrind.
"But how," asked the hard-featured
man who was looking at the pictures,
"do you know this Is an accurate like
ness of Homer?"
"Do you know, sir, of anybody else
it looks like?" demanded the artist.
"No."
"Then of course It's Homer." Chi
cago Tribune.
Afraid of Her Majesty.
"My dear Mrs. Tlmmidd, how have
you managed to keep your cook so
long?"
"Keep her? That's easy enough.
It's only because none of us have the
courage to discharge her." Philadel
phia Bulletin.
Willing to Write a Few More.
Friend Tennyson once received $10
for one line.
Poet Well, on one occasion I wrote
one line and received $20.
Friend Extraordinary I
Poet Not at all I You see, I was a
student then and I wrote home to fath
er, "Please send me a twenty at once."
Omed."
Taking Hia Spite Ont.
He was holding up one side of the
vestibule when the milkman arrived.
"What do you mean by being so
late?" he thundered.
"W-why, sir," stammered the milk
man, "It Is only 5."
- "Doesn't matter! My wife ripped me
np for being late and I got here at 4."
One Wuy Aronnd It.
"Bronson's wife has conceived a
great future for him. She wants him to
run for ofllce."
"Are you sure she isn't looking for
cause for divorce?"-Phlladelphla
North American.
Respect Age.
Ida I don't understand Itl Every
time the comedian tells a few Jokes the
vender boys in the gallery begin to
shout: "Peanuts!" at the top of their
voices.
May-They do that to drown the
cries of "chestnuts" from the other
boys. Chicago News.
One on Her Husband.
When you're downtown to-day"
aid Mrs. Jlbsqwak, "I Want you to
get something at the druggist's If you
caf a the druggist's you can
get it of the Iceman."
"What's the matter with you?" de
manded her spouse. "Are you crazy?
There's nothing that the druggist and
Iceman both keep!"
"Oh, yes, there is!"
'What is It I'd like to know?"
"Why, pond's extract, my dear!"
New York World. 1
, Her Secret.
She-Doesnt the grand old sphinx
awaken glorious emotions In your
He-Well, yes, that is-she always re
minds me of a woman who has firmly
determined that she will never tell w
age.-Detroit Free Press.
His Only Chance.
"Well," said the poet, "T never can
be spoiled by praise, anyway "
"No," the critic admitted, "not un
ess your stuff improves wonderfJJ
in the future."-Chlcago Tlmes-Herafi
Remarkable Change.
"Do you think that Turkv ..n
wremo,Ihoses on rw
J. T"rtf,y mak,iD 0 goose of tt,
tX -Pittsburg Chronicle-Telegraph.-
Iffl
f
DrIsv Whv. Chnllu t
hPfld. Chlcaeo Newa u H
Harbinger of Spring
"Our cold weather is all over"
"What do you go by?"
"Our Janitor Is glvln us a fn u
of steam heat every day now."
No Time to Break Down I
"There's one thing about a polltl)
nnroor nftor all "
"What is that?"
"It keeDS all oonrilrintoa i ... .
cellent health."
Ground, for Attraction f
"Wasn't that a peculiar weddn
The lovers hadn't seen eaeh other ('
forty years." t
"Oh, I don't know. By this time I
doubt, they both look like somebot
else." i
The Modern Father. f
"Papa, he has broken my trust'
heart," moaned the old man's gef
mental daughter. "What shall I i
What shall I do?" 1
"Take It round quick to the rep
shop," said the practical old raanl
Cleveland Plain Dealer. i
An Artist's Admirers. I
"Don't you thing Mrs. Dawbltt pall
beautifully?"
"Oh, yes. I actually took It for
natural complexion at first" Phllaj!
phia Bulletin.
Mitigating. I
"Wasn't It terribly lonesome m
dreary living away up there among u
Eskimos for a whole year?" I
"It was delightful in the spr't
ma'am. Thi y don't do any house-cltal
Ing up there." Chicogo Tribune.
Man'a Contrary Nature.
"When John was younger he alwa'
grumbled when I asked him to dig i
the garden."
"Well?"
"Now he has rheumatism, I gimpf
can't keep him from getting out i
digging it up before he ought to.-l
dianapolis Journal. t
He Wa. Satisfied.
"Do you believe that those who ca
sing and won't sing should be made I
sing, Mr. Sourdrop?" asked Mil
Screecher, with a coy glance toward to
piano. I
"No, I believe In letting well enongf
alone," said the mean old thing. Baf
tin) ore American. i
An Exception to the Role,
"We ought to put more persona
warmth in our letters."
"Oh, I don't know. A man I knel
once put a lot of personal warmth il
some letters, and it got him into cour
In a breach of promise suit" India
apolls Journal.
Use. of the Foot.
Chicago person Your custom of M
binding is wholly incomprehensible t
us. I
Chinese person There Is everyth'i'
in usage. Your custom of foot-paddlnf
Is quite Incomprehensible to us.-Bt
trolt Journal.
"Did Lot's wife turn to salt?"
"No; to rubber." 'I
An Affliction.
City chap (angrily) Look here! Yo.
warranted this horse to me to be en
tirely without faults, and now I flndj
that he Is stone blind.
Country chap (cheerily) Wa-al, blind
ness ain't a fault; it's an afillctioii.-
Puck.
Thrown Down Again.
"I have always been a reader of youi
poetry," began Mrs. Gushe.
"I am glad," replied Algernon Charlesl
Mystic, "that some one understand!
me."
"Oh, but that is what I have been
hoping to meet you for. I wanted you
to explain." Philadelphia North Amer
lean.
Would Do in Hi. Absence.
"Dobley has Just bought the Century
Dictionary for his wife."
"Yes; he said something might come
up she'd want to know about some
time when he didn't happen to be t
home." Life.
Girlish Playfulness.
"I wrote that girl three letters asking
her to return my diamond ring."
"Did you get it?"
"Finally she sent me a don't-wonj
button."
U i n ri n . r-i n.hit.
Horses often have what Is called the
vice of shying, that is, of starting W
denly at the rustle of a leaf or a plec
Of Daner. or nt tho niinronch of 8nf
object to which they are not accus
tomed. Clearly this is the remnant of
an Instinct inherited from their will
progenitors in the steppes or prairies,
where the sudden rustling of a leaf
might Indicate the presence of a wolf,
and where everything that was Strang
was, therefore, suspicious.
Tt la Irila a a wall a a nftial tft tlPSt
horse for shying. That only increases
his alarm, and may easily reduce him
to the state of terror in which he loses
his head entirely. Horses In that staw
seem to lose not only their heads, but
their norfuvnttT-. m.rA a horse iO
that condition may dash headlonf
against a stone wait The habit of shy
ing, when once formed, is difficult to
cure, but it may almost always be pre
vented by such consistent kindness of
treatment as to overpower the Inherited
Instinct of Instant flight from possible
danger in which the habit originates.
Our Animal Friend. '
Not the Place.
rrhollv I think In mo u .
Just ,ke the' Wome,u