Image provided by: University of Oregon Libraries; Eugene, OR
About The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933 | View Entire Issue (Feb. 9, 1900)
PACIFIC COAST NEWS Commercial and Flnanelal Happening of Interact In the Growing Western Stat. Improvement at Ballard. A permit has teen granted to the Seattle Electric Company to bnild a new trestle for the Ballard division of the Consolidated Street Railway! Com pany, extending along the ihore of the bay between Omaha and Alva itreeti, and the right was also granted to build another trestle west of the present one along Salmon Bay. It it the intention of the atreet railway company to ex pend $50,000 In the Improvement of its line to Ballard to meet the trafflo de mand! created by the growth of that city, and to that end three new motor cars of 160-horse power each have been ordered frum Eastern manufacturers, fhe track will be taken up and laid along the new trestle and on Western ivenoe the line will be reconstructed In a modern manner. Saw Hill to Be MoTed. Tatton & Holsches, of Scoggin val ley, have leased the old mill site, 12 . miles west of Forest Grove, formerly swned by Colonel T. B Cornelius, and will commence at once the removal of their saw mill from Scoggin valley to that point. The mill at this location Willi be accessible to large supply of the very finest yelllow fir, and situated 10 miles from Scghers, where the lum ber will be loaded on cars and shipped to Eastern parties, who have plaoed two large contracts with the mill. There is not an idle saw mill in Wash ington county, and this year, owing to the demand for lumber outside of the itate, will be the best year for the In dustry in the history of the county. A to liming School Warrant. The state superintendent has deliv ered an opinion to the effect that school district warrants should not be issued by the clerk or signed by the directors un til thoy have first been audited and tllowed; nor should the warrants be delivered by the clork until he has pro cured the signatures of the directors. "The usual way of doing this is at a meeting of the directors. After the claim is audited, the warrant should bo signed as a part of the transactions of the meeting, and the clerk should then deliver the same to the party to whom it is due. It might, however, come under some method of procedure covered by some by-law that the board has adopted." To Saw Mors Lumber, The lumber business is aotive in Clackamas county, and new machinery Is being added to increase the capacity of several mills. Miller Bros., of Eagle creek, are having improvements made that will increase the cutting capacity of their mill to 10,000 feet daily. F. L. 8. Bagby, of BagbyBros., Molalla, came up from Portland, where he had placed orders for machinery that will increase their cutting capacity to 13.000 feet per day. The latter firm la doing considerable business in the way of furnishing oak lumber to boat builders in Portland. State Park Infected. The gardoner of the capltol grounds la Salem has found indications of the dreaded Ban Jose scale on some of the trees, lie immediately began spray ing, and will spray not only the affect ed trees but Also all the trees and shrubs under his care. Faoiflo Cont Chat. A Eugone man has loadod 100 bales of hops on one car. Burns intends to build a stone to supply a long felt want. jail. A Nestucca man has 775 cases of cheese awaiting shipment. The Spokane exposition is incorpor ated with a capital stock of $10,000. Thirteen knot sawyers at a Falrhaven sawmill went on a strike last Monday morning. At Endicott a 8-year old ohlld of F. E. Staufleld full into a watering trough and was drowned. Fish Commissioner Rood says that the Coos bay salmon hatchery will be built the coming summer. The superintendent of the Stockton mine, Susanville district, it is reported, will erect a 40-stamp mill. William Kingsley, a logger, was killed by the north bound passenger at Machias, Snohomish county. O. Finnigan, a train dispatcher, wai found dead in bed at Seattle. Heart disease is the presumed cause of death. loo new militia organization, Com pany M, of Whatcom, was mustered in to tho Washington National Guard last week. Charles Dully, a Coquille City boy, has shipped a box of 23 dozen frogs tc Ban Francisco. He gets 75o to $1.50 a dozen for thorn. Hohart W. MoNeill, a well known citizen of Seattle, who died on the 27th at San Jose, Cal., will be buried at Oskaloosa, Iowa. Some ranchers on Toison creek report that In their part ot Harney county stock feed is as good in the mountain! as it was in April last. Two citizens of Burns have leased land to the northeast of the town, foi the purpose of constucting a first-class race tack and baseball grounds. In the Silver creek country, Harney county, a week ago, snow was all gone and it was raining. " Edward Marshal Brown is dead in Tacoma as a result of a disease con tracted in the Philippines while serv ing as a member of the First Washing ton. J. F. Allen's store in Fox valley was entered last Tuesday night by burglars, who rilled the money drawer, but took nothing else. They got about $10 in change. J G. K. Hiatt hauled a log at his Edgecomb works on Tuesday which he estimated to be worth $1-5, says the Snohomish Tribune. The stick con tained euough first-class lumber to build a commodious residence. The Harney County News says that Burns is by far the most aggressive city in Eastern Oregon, and the present year will witness the erection of many substantial business buildings. A crowd of young toughs have been disturbing religious services at Free water. Three of them were arrested and fined last week, and it is thought the annoyance will now stop. 1 WEEKLY TRADE REVIEW. i.arge Deliveries Made on Previous - Contract. R. G, Dun & Co.'i weekly review of trade says: This year starts with much of the year's business already done, and all comparisons will prove misleading if that fact is not taken into account. Last year the certainty of great im provement had come before the year opened, and there was a rush to get in orders before wotks became crowded and prices advanced. This year the works are already crowded for months ahead in most lines, andprkes had al ready advanced so fur that recoil had already commenced in some branches, and was thought probable in others. With the exception of woolen manu factures, the chief industries have met less new business in January than last year, though deliveries on previous con tracts have been larger than a year ago. Wheat rose 1 cent, but soon reacted. Atlantic exports were only 1,406,592 bushels, flour included, for the week. Pacifio exports have been '4,200.300 bushels in five weeks, against 8,670,854 bushels last year. Speculation in cotton has raised the price to M cents, without improve ment in the demand. The receipts from plantations still fall so fur behind last year's that low estimates of yield are expected. Wool is rather weaker in some grades, but stronger in others, so that the average of quotations is steady, not withstanding some sales at concessions. The iron and steel industry is so far tied op by contracts reaching through most of the year, that the effect of pro duction exceeding consumption is felt only in some instances. Failures for the week have lieen 232 in the United States, against 224 last year, and 84 in Canada, against 25 last year. PACIFIC COAST TRADE. Seattle Market. Onions, new, $2.52.50 per sack. Lettuce, hot house, 40c pr doz. Potatoes, new, $18 20. Beets, per sack, 75 (S 85c. Turnips, per sack, 60c. Carrots, per sack, 60c. Parsnips, per sack, 75 85c. Cauliflower, 75c.l per dozen. Cabbage, native and California, $1.00 1.25 per 100 pounds. Apples, $1.25 1.50 per box. Pears, $1.00 1.25 per box. Prunes, 000 per box. Butter Creamery, 81o per pound; dairy, 1722c; ranch, 20o per pound. Eggs 20o. Cheese Native, lOo. Poultry 13 14c; dressed, 14 15c Hay Puget Sound timothy, $12.00; choice Eastern Washington timothy, $18.0010.00 Corn Whole, $23.00; cracked, $23; feed meal, $23. Barley Rolled or ground, per ton, $21; whole, $22. Flour Patent, per barrel, $3.25; blouded straights, $3.00; California, $3.25; buckwheat flour, $0.00; gra ham, per barrel, $8.80; whole wheat flour, $3.00; rye flour, $3.804.00. Millstuffs Bran, per ton, $14.00; shorts, per ton, $16.00. Feed Chopped feed, $20.00 por ton; middlings, per ton, $20; oil cake meal, per ton, $80.00. Fresh Meats Choice dressod beef steers, 45o; cows, 44?4c; pork, 4 He; trimmed, 6c; veal, small, 6c; large, 4c. Hams Large, -13c; small, 13; breakfast bacon, 12 Kc; dry salt sides, 8o. Portland Market. Wheat Walla Walla. 62 58c; Valley, 62o; Bluestem, 54o per bushel. Flour Best grades, $2.90; graham, $2.25; superfine, $2.15 per barrel. Oats Choice white, 85 30c; choice gray, 84o per bushel. Barley Feed barley, $1516.00; brewing, $17.50 18.60 per ton. Millstuffs Bran, $17 per ton; mid dlings, $22; shorts, $18; chop, $10 per ton. Hay Timothy, $10 11; clover, $7 8; Oregon wild hay, $6 7 per ton. Butter Fancy creamery, 6055c; seconds, 42 K45o; dairy, 8037c; store, 22s27io. Kggs 1616o perdozen. Cheese Oregon full cream, 18c; Young America, 14o; new cheese lOo per pound. Foultry Chickens, mixed, $8.00 4.00 por dozen; hens, $4.50; springs, $J. 60(38.60; geese, $7.008.00 for old; $4.5088.50; ducks, $6.007.00 per dozen; turkeys, live, 12o per pound. Potatoes 55 80o per sack; sweets, 8 2 40 per pound. Vegetables Beets, $1; tumips, 90c; per sack; garlio, 7o per pound; cab bago, lo per pound; parsnips, $1; onions, $1.602.00; carrots, $1. Hops 7 lOo; 1898 crop, 66o. Wool Valley, 1213e per pound; Eastern Oregon, 8 14c; mohair, 27 80o per pound. Mutton Gross, best sheep, wethers and ewes, 4e; dressed mutton 7 iHo per pound; lambs, 7 Mo per pound. Hogs Gross, choice heavy, $5.00; light and feeders, $4.60; dressed, $5.506.00 per 100 pounds. Beef Gross, top steers, $4.004.50; cows, $3. 50 4.00; dressed beef, 6n' 7 ?4 o per pound. Veal Largo, 7 8c; small, Sy 9c per pound. Run rnnpiiiMi Market. Wool Spring Nevada, 1215o per pound; Eastern Oregon, 1216c; Val ley, 2022c; Northern, 1012o. Hops 1S99 crop, ll13o per pound. Butter Fancy creamery 2728o; do seconds, 252tlo; fancy dairy, 23 2t!e; do seconds, 1821o per pound. I'-gS8 Store, 15 18c; fax.cy ranch, 19c. Millstuffs Middling, $18.00 21.00; bran, $14.50 15.00. Hay Wheat $8.50 9.50; wheat and oat $u.609.00; boot barley $5.00 7.00; alfalfa, $8.00 7.50 per ton; straw, 30 45c -per bale. Potatoes Early Rose, 90c$l; Ore gou Burbanks, 75o1.10; river Bur banks, 50 $ 75c; Salinas Burbanks, 80it.ai.10 per sack. Citrus Fruit Oranges, Valencia, $2.753.25; Mexican limes, $4.00 5.00; California lemons 75c$1.60; do choice $1.783.00 per box. Tropical Fruit Bananas, $1.60 2.50 per bunch; pineapples, nom inal: Persian dates, 66.Wo per pound. A day or so after Sir Lawrence Alma Tadema,' It. A., had been" knighted, a lady called upon blm and Lady Alma Tadema and expressed herself to blm as follows: "Oh, dear Sir Lawrence, I am awfully glad to bear of the honor you have received. I suppose, now that you have been knighted, you'll give up painting and live like a gentleman!" A young minister who did not scrapie to fish for compliments, was once In vited to take dinner with a douce old elder, as reticent as they make them. Manipulate the conversation as he would, the young man could not get his bust to say "sermon," and at last he boldly Introduced the Important subject by remarking directly, "That was a fine text I bad to-day." But the elder knew his man. "Ou, ay, there's naethlng wrang wl the text!" Father Macklln, who married Mrs. Hazen to Admiral Dewey at his rectory In Washington, some time ago wrote to Mrs. Hazen when her quarterly pew rent was due. In bis note he said that her pew, No. 61, In bis church was get ting moldy, and bo feared she might be going to some other church than his. On the wedding morning (says the Phil adelphia Press) she reminded him of It, and said: "Now, Father Macklln, could you col say my pew 4s 'MUdewey,' In stead of that very ugly word?' Dean Hole, of Rochester, England, tells of a very Innocent and gentle cur ate who went to a Yorkshire parish where the parishioners bred honses and sometimes raced them. lie was asked to Invite the prayers of the congrega tion for Lucy Gray. He did so. They prayed three Sundays for Lucy Gray. On the fourth the clerk told the curate he need not do It any more; "Why," said the curate, "Is she dead?" "Xo," said tho clerk, "she's won the steeple chase." The curate became quite a power In the parish. Congressman John Murray Mitchell, of New York, went to Sing Sing prison a few days ago to Inspect the place. Upon leaving the prison be went to the telegraph office at the depot and handed this dispatch to the woman operator: "Mrs. J. M. Mitchell, Tuxedo, N. Y.: Have Just escaped. Expect me home tonight. J. M. M." "Aren't you afraid of being captured?" asked the operator, frightened almost to death. "I trust the Western Union Telegraph Companj to keep my secret," replied the Con, gressman. "Don't say a word to an.r body." "I promise," said the little woman. The Congressman concealed a smile as be left the office to board the train for New York. Algernon Dougherty, of the United States diplomatic service, has qualities of his own to account for his success as well as being the son of the famous "Sllver-Tongued Dougherty," of Phila delphia. One of the rules of the arts tocratlc Parisian concierge Is that while one may ride up In the elevator, oue must not ride down. It was Mr. Dougherty who broke down this rule In a bouse In the Rue de Maturln. He started down, and the concierge stopped the elevator. "It Is forbidden." "By whom?" "The proprietor forbids It," said the concierge. Mr. Dougherty drew himself up and said: "Tell your proprietor that I forbid him to forbid me anythlug!" and rode on down. And now, even the timid maiden ladles on the sixth floor play with that elevator as though It were a tame cat. Col. Sheffield Phelps, owner of the Jersey City Journal, was the richest newspaper man In America several years ago. From his father, the late William Walter Phelps, he Inherited a fortune of several millions, but after he was graduated from Yale he began active newspaper work as a reporter on the World In New York. Once he was sent to report the wedding of the da ugh ter of a Wall street man. The report ers were met at the front door by a servant, who quickly separated them from the guests and led them to the host's private room, where the banker met them In person and gave them type, written slips containing the Informs tlon they were sent for. Then chauv pagne was opened and the banker took some cigars from a drawer In his desk. "Have one," he said to Phelps; "they're genuine conchas. I Import them my' self." "Thanks," said Phelps, pleas' antly, as he took the cigar; "have one of mine. They're real oscuro maduros." WHAT SOUTH AFRICA IS. Vast riutenn C,000 Feet Above the Sea Lay of the Land. Allen Sangree contributes to Alnslee's an article on South Africa. This Is how tho country appeared to him: "Vou land in South Africa at the foot of a mountain 3,600 feet high. They call it Table Mountain, and the veil of mist that, excepting on very clear days, over- haugs It, South Africans are pleased to term the "Tablecloth." Presenting a front of solid rock 1,000 feet In height. perpendicular as a wall, and for half a mile on top quite level, this mountain offers tho best natural sign-board on earth. Time and again have English firm i attempted with fabulous sums to secure It for advertising purposes, but as yet there has been no such deface ment. "Table Mountain makes the tip end of the Dark Continent. Below It nestles the city of Cape Town, a beautiful bay stretching out In the foreground. On the west the mountain breaks off ab ruptly, and the railroad skirts about It to the Interior. On the east It slopes off Into a hilly, picturesque formation known as the 'Lion's Back,' and then gradually rises Into the Drakensburg Mountains. This !s the only great mountain range south of the Zambesi, and by noting Its location, one may un derstaud In a trice just what South Africa la geographically. "Steaming along the East Coast from Cape Colony northward, you nave the Drakensburg In view nearly all the way to Belra. a distance of 2.000 nilles. In Cape Colony and Natal the moun tains In many places dip to the water's edge, and with a field glass one may see on their crags and peaks smoke curl lug np from the native Tillages. In Portuguese territory the mountains re cede slightly from the coast, and at Pelagoa Bay there U an Intervening stretch of lowland twenty mllei wide. At Belra th!a has Increased to sixty miles. At the Zambesi the Drakens burg ends. "To get Into the interior of South Africa from any of,th five East Coast landing places, Port Elizabeth, East London, Durban, Delagoa Bay and Belra, one must first cross a short ex tent of lowland, and then ascend steep mountains. Having arrived there, the traveler Is conscious of little or no de scent, five-sixths of the whole interior being a vast plateau that extends to the Zambesi on the north, the Atlantic Ocean on the west, and varies In alti tude from 8,000 to 6,000 feet above the sea level. "A fringe of tropical country, where bloom the magnolia and the rose, where flourish the orange, pineapple, lemon, guano, grape, banana, the cotton and the tea plant; a long stretch of moun tains running parallel with the Indian Ocean, the highest peaks of which are capped with snow, and In whose valleys wave tracts of wheat and corn; a vast prairie, dotted here and there with patches of scrub woodland, mission sta tions, and Immense farms with millions of sheep and cattle grazing thereon; a few thousand hamlets scattered like oases over a great landscape, made black by the native Africans who live In thatched huts and, wear but a breech clout; a dozen large' towns, where Is heard the clang of the American trolley car and the clatter of the police patrol, and about which men cluster as flies gather to a Jar of sweets; the remnants of a once mighty zoological garden, In cluding many leopards, beautiful and lithe, baboons, antelope, Jackals and crocodiles, a less number of hippopot ami, and a few herds of buffalo, ele phants and giraffes; some Iron ore, some coal, some copper, and a llttlo silver; forty miles of gold and 100 acres of diamonds. That Is South Africa," NEWSBOY With a Bide Line that Pays a Dividend on Hi Shrewdneua. There Is a boy In Philadelphia who some day Is going to be a millionaire. He Is only a newsboy now, and sells papers every afternoon at one of the railroad stations, but when be cannot manage to make a sale be exercises his wits and the result Is generally sure. The Saunterer has often noticed this particular lad, and after purchasing a paper one afternoon last week stood near by In the hope of seeing something Interesting. He bad not long to wait A young man was coming down the steps that lead from the train floor to the street He was dressed In a frock coat and silk hat, and moved slowly as If preoccupied. Oue urchin tackled hi in when be was half way down with a "Pos'crlp," and the young man shook his head. Then the Saunterer's young friend saw him. Stepping up to the man the youngster halted him and said, with the pollteni ss of a Chesterfield; "Beg your pnrdon, mister, but dey's souiethln' on yer coat Want me to take It off?" The young man stood while the boy passed his hand over the back of the coat, and brought to view three or four long strands of golden hair. The look of confusion and apparent guilt on the face of the man was worth seeing. He hastily ran bis band Into bis pocket pulled out a quarter and tendered It to the boy and fairly ran the rest of the way to the street. The boy stood chuckling, "ne's dead easy," he remarked. "I got dera from my sister," and be pulled out a handful more from his pocket and showed It to the Saunterer. "You see, everything comes In handy In this line," and he went back to bis business of selling the wary and preying upon the unsuspect ing. Olrf-Fashloned Notions. Men who save a margin from a com fortable Income often look with amaze ment upon the "thrlftlessnees" of the poor. This time-honored point of view Is happily Illustrated by the Journal of Samuel Breck, a gentleman of means and fashion, who made this entry In the year 1S20: "Mrs. B. discharged a servant girl to-day for fibbing and mlscblef-maklng. She had been for nearly three years In my family. No sooner was she en titled to receive a few dollars than she squandered them In finery, bedecking herself In merino shawls, chip bonnets, and so forth, without laying up $15, though she bad received from $1.60 to $1.25 per week." Mr. Breck did not believe In Innova tions. They have such a vulgarizing tendency! "Steam," said he, "In many respects Interferes with comfort in traveling, destroys every salutary distinction In society, and overturns by Its whirligig power the once rational, gentlemanly and safe mode of getting along on a journey. Talk of ladles on board a steamboat or In a railroad car! There are none. To restore herself to her caste, let a lady move In select com pany at five miles an hour, and take her meals In comfort at a good inn, where she may dine decently." Partly Correct. Most of the stores In the remote busi ness sections of the city are constantly annoyed by children of the neighbor hood coming to the door and asking for cards, empty boxes and similar articles. The clerks are. of course, down on the youngsters, and the warfare never ends. The other day a small boy poked his bead In the door of a West Side store and called out: "Say, mister, got any empty boxes?" "No," said the clerk, not very politely. "Got any cards?" "No." "Got any almanacs?" "No." "Got any empty bottles?" "No." "Got' any sense?" "No! yes no yes you mfserablellt- tie wretch." And the clerk flew at hi tormenter, but the latter had fled. Ohio 1 State Journal. A Great Treat. Two little London girls, who had been sent by the kindness of the vicar's wife, to have "a happy day In the coun try," narrating their experiences on their return, said: 'Oh. yes, mum; we did 'ave a 'aooy day. We see two pigs killed and a gen tleman burled." London Tid-Blts, The man who thinks he knowa It all Is the man who acquires the least wealth as a result of his knowledge. HOMESPUN PHILOSOPHY. Observation on Commonplace Things by the Atchison Globe Han. Some women amount to nothing out side of their church. The older the man Is, the fewer the things bat agree with blm. We have an Idea that suet pudding Is the howitzer of food stuffs. You needn't go to war to test your courage: have your teeth fixed. No difference what you do on Sun day, you are not satisfied on Monday. Fancy goods, after Christmas, have about as Inviting a look as cold gravy, When a brakeman Is on his way to dinner, he says be is going to take on coal. If a man bas a little ability, people abuse him because he docs not "do" more. No boy thinks be bas had enough candy until he has started a tooth to aching. In order to fully appreciate a cigar, a man should always be trying to quit smoking. . After a man passes 40 be Is greatly encouraged If he has enough hair to get a tangle In It. An old man's Idea of a useful person Is one who always has time to play a game of checkers. We have noticed that most old people wear old clothes, and that young people wear good clothes. Fodtlcal success, like anything else, depends almost entirely on the amount of rustling a man does. When a woman dislikes a man, It Is her favorite mode of abuse to charge that be leads a dual life. A good many men boast of their methodical habits who never have any' thing but unpaid bills to file away. The gossips In Bible days must have had a good time. If they knew of the things going on that the Bible tells about It Is one Indication that people are getting old when they advocate that all young people should "be taken down a peg." Always make It a point to tell every secret told you, and your friends will finally stop bothering you by telling you any. By "appearing at perfect ease In so ciety," Is meant that one laughs and talks as loud as If on the back porch at home. If a man living In this part of the country should tire of fried eggs, we don't know what on earth he would eat for breakfast If yon want to make trouble for an enemy, tell his wife that a daughter In the family has musical talents which must not be burled. In every home you will find at least a half dozen skin lotions and toilet ar: tides on a girl's dressing table, and $ boy with bands chapped and bleeding. The oldest story In the world proba bly Is the one told by the boys when they return from hunting: that they killed a duck, but that they couldn't find it Too Great a Task. Mackllu, the actor and dramatist, once boasted In the presence of Samuel Foote that he had brought his memory to such a state of perfection, through severe training, that he could "learn anything by rote on hearing It once." Foote scribbled on a card for a few minutes and then passed the card to Macklln, asking him to read and repeat what was written. This was the far rago: "She went into the garden to cut a cabbage leaf to make an apple pie, when a great she bear coming up the street -pops its head Into the shop, 'What! no soap?' So he died, and she verv Imprudently married the barber and there were present the PlnLnnles and the Jobllllies and the Garyulles and the grand panjandrum himself with the little round button at top, and they all fell a-playlng the game of catch as catch can till the gunpowder ran out of the heels of their boots." It Is needless to remark that Macklln's memory did not stand the test Boston Transcript. Washington la Not Typical. Washington city Is not the United States. It Is not a representative Amer lean city. Its population Is not typi cal. There Is no commerce in Wash ington. There Is no manufacturing In Washington. There are no large mer cantile bouses In Washington. It is a city largely made up of drones from the Idle attaches of legations to the young army officers with "soft things;' from the yawning Government clerks, who kill flies with rulers, to the lazy negroes who loaf and sleep and snore In the galleries of Congress. It Is a city of people without homes except for the new rich, who seek there "so cial standing" which they could not at tain tn more settled communities. It Is a city of boarding houses, Inhabited by men and women who live In abject fear of losing their Government Jobs, San Francisco Argonaut Comnetltion in Mlraolea. A zealous Mohammedan In India pro poses to Lord Curzon that the British government can a public conference of all the rellclons for the Duroose of de- termlulng the validity of their preten sions Dy competition In the perform ance within a year of some unspecified but manifest miracle. By this means he hopes to prove that Mohammed was greater than all oth ers, and that his religion is the right one.- If he falls to do this he offers himself for crucifixion a mode of sac rifice which the prophet did not or dain, and which would prove nothing except that Mirza Ahmad of Kadlan. the author of the proposal, had courage enough to make a martyr of himself In the Interest of his faith. New York Tribune. Paving; Stones of Tar. Paving stones, with coal tar as one of the Ingredients of -their must be regarded as a novelty. The Germans are making artificial paving stones by mixing coal tar and sulphur, adding chlorate of lime and then break ing up the mass and adding broken glass. This Is reduced to a powder and subjected to severe pressure, and the paving stone Is ready for use. This Is said to be a woman's age, yet women have UtUe to say about their age. It's a short street that has no turn for the organ-grinder. 0TJB BUDGET OF FUN. HUMOROUS SAYINGS AND DO. INGS HERE AND THERE. Joke and Jokeleta that Are Supposed to Have Been Recently Born Saying's and Doing that Are Old, Cnrions and Langhable-The Week'a Hnmor, Hardacre-JoIng to build a wash bouse In the yard, Zcke; what kind of stone would be the best for a founda tion? Crawfoot Did you say a washhouse, Zeke? Well, It seems to me soapstone would be good as any. Sinister Delight. "I can't understand why women en Joy seeing foot-ball." "I'll tell you. It Is because It makes the men look as If tbey had been clean Ing house." Indianapolis Sentinel A Heal Dilemma. Fanny Footlights 1 bad a quarrel with the manager and threatened to leave the company. Polly Plnktlghts And wasn't there anybody to take your part? Fanny Footlights Only my horrid onderstudy. Philadelphia Record. Not Happily Expressed. She I think one should give up danc Ing when oue Is getting on for 80. We none of us grow younger, you know, He Ah! Miss Lambkin, you can't ay that! Moonshine. At the Polle. "A woman tried to vote here to-day." "How'd you get rid of her?" ' "Told her to send It by mall, so that It would be sure to receive official at tention." Philadelphia North Ainerl can. Utilitarian. " "Frederick, our marriage anniversary comes this year on Thanksgiving Day." "Is that so, Bertha? Well, shall we give each other a turkey or ducks?" Indianapolis Journal. Expensive. She What did papa sny? He He sold he'd be delighted to have me for a son In-law, ouly be couldn't afford It Good Cheer. "Now tell me, doctor, candidly. there anything really the matter with my wife?" "Yes. Her vocnl chords are sadly af fected. I'm afraid she may lose her voice." "Say, drop In on your way back from the office and chat a while, will you? Things have been going badly with me lately, and It's so comforting to hear you talk." Chicago Times-Herald. Might Hit the Barn. "I had a glorious dream," said the turkey. "What was It?" Inquired the goose, "I dreamt that Instead of assasslna ting us with an ax the gun would be used In the future." "I don't see any difference; the farm er will kill you, anyway." "Yes; but I dreamt the farmer's wife would do the shooting. How safe I would be It dreams were true." Realistic. "Lumps of Ice floating on a green sea," murmured the poetic girl. "How glorious!" mused the lover, who sometimes Imbibed. "All needed to complete the drink would be a straw." Professional Jealousy. Successful competitor Ah. this is What I do call fat stock! What d've think o' this? You can lay yer 'and in ere for nigh on dree inches, vou can. What's the matter wi' this? Unsuccessful ditto Dropsy! Punch. How She Was Landed. Bess So Jeannette married a farmer. I thought she said she would marrv only a man of culture? Nell And so she did a man of asrri- culture. Her Little Joke. He Her beauty quite Intoxicates me. She Perhaps it's her smiles. Brilliant Headlight. Mrs. Bender Thoueh it U an int night I knew you were coming up the walk. I saw the end of your cigar glowing in the darkness. Mr. Keuder-Bush. Marchu. I w.n-.h not smoking at all. Mrs. Bender Then It must hav hm the end of your nose I saw. A Word of Warning;. Wife I'm cninir in ...... e o iuu across me street Just a minute tn kii r t - . tfuues good-by. . Husband-Well, you'll have to hurry. The train leaves In three hours. An Explanation. BIZ28 I nndfrstnnit oi . j ayvw ui me as being a miserable cur. Diggs-Not guilty, old chap. I mere ly said you were a sad dog and Biggs-Oh, that's different! Have a cigar. Help Wanted. Pml'o1atMh T . .v.C:j,u i aw a sign in a down town store window this morning that exactly described my condition. , e ii uj, nuai WHS III BrokeleIgh-"Wanted-A Cash GlrL" What She Wanted. Clerk What do you wish, ma'am? Mrs. O'Toole Oi Want tn 111 an... mirrors fit to give as a gift cierK Hand mirrors? Mrs. O'Toole N O: ROm thnt t-a bin w atw J v aviu aae ye er face In. A A, If MR 11 A Pertinent Inquiry. Tom Goode I dropped a 10 gold piece on the contribution plate last Sunday. Jack Potts What was the mattei with it? Merely a Hint. Mr. Borem (11 p. m.) My motto Is "Pay as you go." Miss Cutting-Well, I'm willing to lend you a small amount If It will helu you out! Just Bo. Mack O'ltell Some one has Invented revolving rubber heels for shoes. Luke Warme Ah! Another move ment on foot, I presume. Extreme Economy. Ida That family in the brownstone mansion Is very economical, I hear. May Extremely! Why, they actual ly have their last winter's furs made Into mufflers for their footman aud coachman." The Man Behind the Ledger. "I will cause the name of France to be remembered with terror throughout foreign lands!" cried the excited Paris ian. "What will you do Join the army?" "No." "Write articles for the papers?" "No. I will open a hotel during the exposition and make out the bills my self." Washington Star. A Snre Thins;. Mlllbank My wife sent 50 cents yes terday to a man that advertised a way to make shirt waists last Barclay-Well? Mlllbank She got a postal telling her to make the rest of her clothes first New York Press. , Explained. There was a loud crash In the doll department, accompanied by a sound as of broken crockery rolling over the floor. "What caused that?" demanded the manager of the department, hurrying down the aisle. "One of those Indestructible dolls-fell down Just now," said the .frightened salesglil. Chicago Tribune. Ont of Date. Qulnn Did you notice bow the hero ine escaped from the burning building on a telephone wire? Was it not real istic? De Fonte Yes; but It will lose some of Its realism when the wireless tola graph gets a foothold. A Modern Mother. Husband It Is a perfect disgrace how ragged our children look! Wife I have no time to bother about their clothes. I have to go to a meet ing of the Society for Clothing Poor Children. Husband That's good. You might call the attention of that society to our children! Fllegeude Blaetter. Unnecessary. Maude Did you give Tom permission to kiss you? Clara Of course not. He didn't ask It. Not Particular. Brown I hear Jones Is looking around for new quarters. Smith Oh, I guess he isn't particular about their newness. He borrowed an old one from me this morning. A True Story. Short If Long calls with that little bill tell him I'm out Mrs. Short But that would be telling a falsehood. Short Nothing of the kind. I'm out of cash. Foiled Again. T never give money to beggars on the street" said the pedestrian. "Oh, very well," replied the seedy In dividual. "Here's my card; kindly call at my office and leave your contribu tion with my bookkeeper." A Gentle Hint. He Ida, are you Interested In ath letic sports? She (who has waited) Yes; I am very much interested In the ring Just now. Battled. Itoyster Whoop! Hey! Haw! HIel Shay, officer, w-where do Ish live? Officer Snyder How you dink J know ? Royster Welsh, which Ish norsh and which Ish south? Officer Snyder You vas indoxicated. Else you know dot der Splnlsh wai proved der Is no norf and sout Five Glasses of Water Daily. Dr. Taylor states that the normal adult needs thirty-seven ounces of water a day, and as the average tum bler holds eight ounces, five glasses make forty ounces, aproxlmately the normal quantity. The best time to drink It are one glass upon rising, one at 10 a. m.. one at 3 p. m., one at 5 and one or two on retiring. Instead of the rather Indefinite five glasses a day It Is better to fill a bottle of a given size, the contents of which are to be drunk during each twenty-four hours. Pa tients at famous watering places owe much of their Improvement to the large quantities of water which they are obliged to drink, and the same results could no doubt be obtained at borne by drinking large quantities of good water. Medical World. Arajcon In Disguise. It Is the belief of some historians that the name "Oregon" Is Aragon in dis guise, that It was given to this country by the early Spanish voyagers, aud that American explorers so Interpreted the word given them by the Indians. The theory Is at least plausible, and in dicates a strange freak of fat&