The
Hood
River
Glacier.
It's a Cold Day When We Get Left.
VOL. 5.
HOOD RIVER; OREGON; SATURDAY. APRIL 28; 1894.
NO. 48.
2Keed liver S lacier.
PUBLISHED EVERT SATURDAY HORNING BY
The Glacier Publishing Company.
' SUBSCRIPTION PRICE.
One year , t2 00
Six months 1 OP
Three months 60
BiiKle oopy a f Crate
THE GLACIER
Grant Evans, Propr.
Second St., near Oak. . Hood River, Or.
Shaving and Hair-cutting neatly done.
Satisfaction Guaranteed. .
ASYLUM MYSTERY.
Important
Just
Chinese Decision
Rendered.
WASHINGTON'S NEW CAPITOL.
The Secretary of Washington' Board of
Health Addresses a Letter to Physi
cians Throughout the State.
Olympia. Dr. G. S. Armstrong, Sec
retary of the State Board of Health, has
addressed a letter to the physicians
throughout the State, as follows: "I
am instructed to inform you that the
next semi-annual meeting of the State
Board of Health will take place at Spokane
the evening of May 1,1894. This meeting
will take the form of a convention. The
State Board desires the presence of all
the health officers of the State, to take
part in the discussion upon the various
questions suggested. The objects of the
meeting are the establishment of closer
relations between local and State Boards,
the comparison of views, the presenta
tion of facts, the discussion of practical
methods relating to the prevention of
illness and death and the improvement
of the conditions of the living. Among
the subjects which it is expected will be
presented and discussed are the follow
ing: " 1. The prevention of consumption.
" 2. The education of the people on
sanitary subjects.
' " 3. The restriction and prevention of
scarlet lever and diphtheria.
- "4. Restriction and prevention of dan
gerous and communicable diseases from
the standpoint of the School Board, the
minister, the health officer, the lawyer,
'the press and the State Board of Health.
"5. Contagious diseases of cattle.
"0. Proposed legislation. .
"Authors of papers are requested to
limit them to fifteen minutes, and pa
pers are expected to be original contri
butions, which, when used, are to be the
property of the convention and be left
witii the Secretary. Persons proposing
to be present should notify. the Secretary
of the subject of his paper before the
27th instant. As the State Medical So
ciety meets May 2 at the same place, an
opportunity is presented for attendance
at both meetings." r ' - ' .
PROCEEDING NOT PREMATURE.
Important Chinese Decision Rendered
' by Judge Morrow.
San Fbancibco. Judge Morrow has
rendered an interesting decision in the
case of Chew Heong in the United States
District Court. Proceedings were insti
tuted to secure deportation of the Mon
golian as an ex-convict under the provi
sions of the act of May 5, 1892, as
amended by the act of November 3, 1893.
John T. Dare on behalf of Heong con
tended that he was entitled to the full
period of six months to register; that
therefore the proceedings were prema
ture. Judge Morrow in an elaborate
opinion states that the defendant al
lowed the year to expire in which he
might have obtained a certificate of res
idence under the act of May 5, 1892. He
had an opportunity to secure evidence of
his right to remain in the United States,
but he declined to avail himself of that
opportunity. So far as he is concerned
the act of May 5, 1892, is in full force
and effect, and he Is subject to be de-
Eorted from the United States, because
e failed to obtain a certificate of regis
tration as required by that act. It is
true that Congress extended the period
for obtaining a certificate of registration
to certain persons, but not to the defend
ant. Having been convicted of felony,
he does not come within any of the priv
ileges of the extended period, and can
not now or at any time hereafter obtain
a certificate of residence under its pro
visions. This proceeding is not there
fore premature.
WASHINGTON'S NEW CAPITOL.
Fears That the Appropriation Will Re
' vert to the Treasury.
, Oi.ympia. The Capitol Commission
meeting set for Tuesday last did not ma
terialize, and the reason assigned was
that Judge Burke was unable to leave
his personal business in Seattle. An;
other meeting is set for Tuesday next.
These' unaccountable delays at a time
when every day counts have become very
Barber Shop
annoying to those who desire to see the
building fairly under way before another
session ot the TegiBiature, ana ttie post
ponements from time to time without
apparent reason have had a tendency to
make even the most sanguine lose faith
in the ultimate commencement of work
on the new btatenouse. Certain it is
that personal assurances have been made
by those in power to prominent Olym
pians til at ttie work would be lairly un
der way betore another winter sets in,
but spring is now so far advanced with
out anything having been accomplished
that thoughtful persons are now unable
to see now any amount of work could be
accomplished during ttie summer even
were a plan agreed upon immediately,
tor tne reason that much time must nec
essarily be consumed in summoning the
architect, making tne specifications, ob
taining contractors' bids, advertising.
etc., to say nothing of the blocks that
may be placed to stay the wheels of
progress in the way of injunctions and
other legal complications. There are
now two new. Commissioners, who have
never seen the plans, and time must be
granted Thomas Burke and J. S. Allen
to make a personal examination before
they can be called upon to make a choice.
Taken all in all, the prospects lor a new
capitol are not particularly bright at
present, and certain it is that $125,000
of the appropriation will revert to the
treasury on May 1 next.
NEW COUNTY WANTED.
Wahkiakum and a Portion of Pacific to
be United.
..' Astohia. The question of uniting the
south portion of Pacific county and all
of Wahkiakum county is being agitated
among the people of that section of
Washington. The matter was thorough
ly canvassed during the last session of
the Washington Legislature, and the per
titions circulated were signed by over
four-fifths of the legal voters of Wahki
akum and the peninsula in Pacific coun
tv. The matter of the tmsHfurfi of a ran-
e'ral law regulating the dividing of older
counties and the formation of new ones
will be brought forward when the Legis
lature meets and a stubborn light made
in' behalf of the plan proposed. The
new county thus organized will have a
population of over 5,000.' Easy-access
could be had to all parts of it on account
of its geographical situation,, whereas at
present it requires from two to five days'
time for those people living in the ex
treme southeast portion of Pacific county
to , reacj) South Bend, the new county
seat. ,
CALIFORNIA HOP STATISTICS.
Late ' Cultivation - and Close Trimming
Cause Poor Roots. '.
Sacramento. California has had an
exceedingly mild winter, and the pros
pects for a good hop crop should he very
bright, but they are not in the vicinity
of Sacramento. The roots were in an
unhealthy state, and many thousands
have been used for replanting old fields.
The stock is decidedly scarce. The cause
of the poor roots is ascribed to late cul
tivation and close trimming. Conserva
tive estimates place the increased acre
age at about 20 per cent. The present
dry weather is detrimental to new plant
ings, especially those on high ground,
but the dry weather has forced the roots
and the ground is covered with vines at
this time, giving assurances of an early
crop. The quantity win depend upon
the amount of rain within tne next m
teen days, and at the same time the
yards along the Sacramento river will be
helped considerably by the present high
water. ' .
AN ASYLUM MYSTERY.
Steward of the Stellacoom Institution
Found to Have Been Poisoned.
Tacoma. Representative Joseph A.
Shadle, Steward of the Steilacoom In
sane Asylum, died on March 3 suppos
edly of apoplexy. Coroner Heska issued
a death certificate naming that disease
as the cause. Later there were rumors
of a mysterious death, caused partly by
the death of the wife of Dr. Redpath at
the asylum last July under somewhat
similar, circumstances. On March 17
Sbadle'a body was exhumed at Waus
seon, O., and the stomach sent for analysis-
to Dr. W.'I. Hamlin,' a Detroit
chemist, who makes affidavit that he
found atrophia poison sufficient to kin.
The affidavits received here have created
great surprise. Prosecuting Attorney
Snell says he will probe the mystery to
the bottom to see if a crime has been
committed. Asylum physicians say Sha
dle died of apoplexy. No motive for
poisoning or huiciuo id kuuwu,
Hiring of Teachers by School Boards.
Tacoma.- Judge Pritchard has ruled
that School Boards need not wait until
the annual elections in order to' hire
teachers for the school year commencing
in September, but contracts made prior
to the annual elections were subject to
curtailment to the minimum term if the
electors so voted. This is the point con
tended for by the teachers of the State,
who have been pushing the case. The
District Boards have also objected to
this curtailment of their power, and the
decision meets with general satisfaction
by both teachers and directors. The
State Superintendent in July last ruled
that contracts by the old board were
void, and this opinion was sustained by
the Attorney-General. The teachers
through Mr. "Dewey of the Sumner pub
lic school appealed the case to the Supe
rior Court of Pierce county with the
above result. It will probably go to the
Supreme Court. All the teachers and
School Directors of the State are watch
ing the case. , .
Sale of State School Lands. .
Olympia. The State Land Commis
sion has autnorizea tne saie ot scnooi
lands in Clarke and Yakima counties, to
take place May 26.
' I IVrt RT A NT f A
jliVwwlAlAlNl
Now Before the United States
Supreme Court.
OYSTERS FOR WASHINGTON.
The Bill Introduced In the Honse by
Perry of Connecticut to Establish
-. . Bureau of Interstate Banks. ' .
Washington City. Representative
Perry of Connecticut has introduced in
the House a bill to establish a bureau of
interstate banks. The bill authorizes
bank to deposit with the Treasurer of
the United States as security for circu
lation " any interest-bearing bonds is-
sued under due authority of law by the
United States or any State of the United
States, or by any county, or by any mu
nicipal corporation located within s
such State." It is provided that the
Comptroller shall pass upon the charac
ter ot tne bonds, and tnat they shall
meet certain prescribed conditions. A
bank having an authorized capital stock
ot not exceeding $i5i,uw snail deposit
bonds of par value of not less than one-
fourth of the stock, and larger banks
shall deposit not less than $50,000. The
United States does not guarantee the
circulating notes as under the national
banking act, but holds the bonds as col
lateral security and is authorized to cell
them if the bank goes into liquidation
at what they will bring. . The notes.
moreover, shall constitute a first and
paramount lien upon all the assets of
the bank. The provisions for redemp
tion require redemption in legal-tender
united states com upon tne presentation
of the notes, and also reauire a reserve
of 25 per cent of lawful money of the
United States. A central redemption
agency is established in the office of the
Comptroller of the Currency, and the
banks are required to keep there 5' per
cent of their outstanding circulation for
the redemption of notes which may drift
too far from the locality where the bank
is established to be presented for redemp
tion at its own counters. This redemp
tion tuna diners from that under the ex
isting law by being required to be kept
in com instead of lawful money. .'
OYSTERS' FOR WASHINGTON.
State Fish Commissioner Trying to Get
j Eastern Oysters to Plant.
Washington City. James Crawford,
Washington's State Fish Commissioner,
is endeavoring to get a supply of East
era oysters to plant in the waters of his
State, and has just written again on the
subject to the United States Fish Com
missioner. When Colonel McDonald,
the United States Fish Commissioner,
was on a visit to the Pacific Coast last
year he made an examination of Willapa
Harbor with a view to establishing an
experimental station there to determine
whether the Eastern oyster would prop
agate in those waters. The information
which he obtained concerning the saline
character of the water, the native food
and other advantages were consid
ered satisfactory, and he then decided to
send a sufficient supply to make a test
of transplanting and propagation. Fish
Commissioner Crawford now asks that
the promised supply be doubled ; that
when the shipment is made to Willapa
Harbor as many more may be gent to
Olympia to be placed in Oyster Bay. Mr.
Crawford promises to see that competent
men take charge of them, and that all
suggestions and directions which Colonel
McDonald may make relative to their
proper treatment are carefully carried
out. Mr. Crawford has also written to
Senator Squire and enlisted his aid in
the matter. The Senator believes both
shipments can be obtained without much
trouble. Commissioner Crawford has
also made application for a loan to the
State of Washington of one of the large
government aquariums at the Midwin
ter Fair.
MINERAL LAND QUESTION.
Supreme Court Now Hearing Argument
in This Important Case.
Washington City. The full bench of
the Supreme Court has been engaged in
hearing the arguments in the case of
Barden vs. the Northern, Pacific Rail
road Company, which comes to this court
on appeal from the Circuit Court of the
district of .Montana. The question is
whether the lands ascertained to be min
eral lands after the grant to the railroad
company are to be considered the prop
erty of the company, Congress . having
excluded mineral lands from the opera
tion of the grant. The company insists
that only mineral lands are excluded
as were known to be mineral lands
at the time of the grant, while counsel
for Barden asserts the mineral lands are
excluded up to the time that the patent
was issued. The government is uphold
ing the case of Barden, who was repre
sented by Solicitor-General Maxwell and
W. W. Dixon, James McNaught and J.
J.Carter appearing for the railroad com
pany. The principle laid down by the
court in its decision of this case will have
an important bearing on other mineral
land contests in Montana, and the inter-,
ests at stake are very large. Most of the
mineral lands along the.Northern Pacific
in Montana, Idaho and Washington will
be affected by this case.
Ramsay a Rear-Admiral.
Washington City. By the retirement
of Rear-Admiral Benham Commodore
Ramsay became a Rear-Admiral. He
had been for the past five years chief of
the navigation bureau of the Navy De
partment. '
WASHINGTON CITY NEWS.
The bill extending the jurisdiction of
the State of Wyoming over the Yellow
stone Park has passed the House.
An old case has just been decided,
which gives Norah Simpson a quarter
section of land near Astoria. The case
has been in litigation many years.
' Secretary Carlisle has appointed Ellis
C. Johnson of the State of Washington
a chief of division of the internal rev
enue of the Treasury Department. ;
The President's Behring Sea proclama
tion has been issued. After reciting the
act of Congress it declares that it is pro
claimed to the end that its provisions
may' be -known and -observed.:-' Every
person found guilty of violation of pro
visions of said act will be arrested and
punished as therein provided, and all
vessels so employed, their tackle, ap
parel, furniture and cargo will be seized
and forfeited.
The Secretary of the Interior-has laid
before the Senate an elaborate report
irom tne superintendent ot the census,
giving a list of sugar refineries that .re-
tused to turmsn statistics to the census
agents, chief among which appear those
ot Harrison irasier & Co. or i'hiiadel
phia and the Havemeyers of New York
It appears that legal proceedings were
directed to be commenced, but that in
view of the completion of the statistics
beioresuch proceedings could be con1
ducted to a finish the Department of
Justice was notined not to proceed.'
The Secretary of the Interior has ad
dressed a letter to the Attorney-General
recommending that the contemplated
suit by the government : to secure the
cancellation of patents issued many
years ago for the San Fernando private
land grant in California be abandoned.
An examination of the abstract of title
to the, grant reveals the fact that these
lands have passed by various means' of
conveyances into other hands than those
of the original grantees. Whatever the
equities in this case may be, they are
stale. In regard to the policy to be pur
sued by the government in attacking
tnis and other Mexican grants in Cali
fornia the Secretary says he does not be
lieve that any general policv could be
formulated. The government will Of
necessity have to be controlled by the
facts involved in each case : besides
due regard tor the eacredness of our
treaty obligations should invoke caution
before proceeding to take steps to cancel
so solemn an instrument as a patent of
tne government. :;
Horace Brewster, a resident of the
United States, but whose postoffice ad
dress is Ladner. B. C, has camped for
some time now opolntnenlghthouseT-e
serve on Point Roberts, which bit -of
land in American waters the Canadian
government would like very much to re
gain.- Mr. Brewster thinks this govern-
ernraent, having never made any use
of the land and not evincing disposition
to do so now, ought to give him the land
on which he has squatted in return for
the improvements and cultivation which
he has put upon it. An interview with
Hon. Daniel Lamont, Secretary of War,
makes it possible to assure not only Mr.
Brewster, but the Canadian government
likewise, that the United States proposes
to hold this little piece of land which
uts out into the Sound from the main
land of British Columbia, regarding it
as a very important strategic point and
one that might be of great advantage in
time ot war. , in the meantime there is
no particular objection to settlers going
upon this land, so long as they do no
damage, but it might be well for all such
to. remember that while on that land
they are subject to all the stringent Fed
eral laws which have been enacted to
protect property and preserve order upon
military and civic reservations of the
united States.
General Wade Hampton, Commis
sioner of Railroads, has submitted to
the House Committee having supervision
of the matter sundry memoranda on the
various pending bills for a settlement of
the debt of the Pacific railroads to the
United States. - From these memoranda
it appears that the Commissioner is op
posed to the foreclosure of the lien on
the roads and the management thereof
by Congress, as proposed by one bill, but
is favorably disposed to the maintenance
of the sinking fund and the payment
into it of a larger proportion of the net
earnings. Tie says that on the maturity
of the debts of these roads these forms
of settlement with the committee will
be presented, from which a choice must
be made, viz. : first, foreclosure ; second,
maintain the sinking fund and require
that a larger percentage of net earnings
be paid into it; third, refund the debt.
Discussing the question of foreclosure,
he says:. "A foreclosure of the lien, it
admitted, will not satisfy the debt.
and the sale of the subsidized roads un
der decree of the court would not realize
more than enough to cancel the amount
of the first mortgage bonds, in which
case the United States would be required
to lose its claim or buy in the liens and
pay off the first mortgage indebtedness.
Railway; management by Congress, be
sides being opposed to the settled policy,
would not only be a doubtful, but a dan
gerous experiment. It could not well
be diverted from politics, associated as
the latter is with the attendant danger
of a corruption of the civil service. This
alternative therefore should be rejected."
Under the second lorm ot settlement he
says the sinking fund may be maintained
and a larger proportion of net earnings
be required to be paid into it, so that
not only current interest may be met,
but the principal ot the bonds gradually
diminished. - This proposition, he says,
has already been recommended for adop
tion in the form of a proposed bill which
was submitted to the Secretary of the
Interior for transmission to the commit
tee. Concerning the question of re
funding ' the , debt the Commissioner
points out that the Frye Senate bill in
troduced in December, 1891, is the same
as the Brown bill introduced in the
House at this session of Congress, and
which provides for the refunding of the
debt.. - .. -' "
BRUTAL GERMANS.
Outrages Committed Upon
African Prisoners.
A NOTORIOUS MARQUIS DEAD.
King Kabba Regas Devastates Immense
Tracts of Country in Africa, But is
A Defeated by the British. '' .
London. Advices received from
Uganda under date of December 7 say
that the British East Africa Company's
forces met those of Kabba Regas, the
most powerful chief of the district, and
defeated them. The fight lasted three
hours, after which the enemy fled, leav
ing fifty dead on the field. The British
forces in Uganda recently declared war
against JK.abba Kegas, King of Unyoro,
King Kabba Regas was considered a vas
sal of King Mwanga of Uganda. He re
fused to acknowledge this or pay tribute.
The power of King Regas at one time
was great, but tyranny and cruelty have
weakened his hold on the natives. . He
is a noted slave dealer. His native bands,
equipped with firearms obtained from
the Arabs, have devastated vast tracts
of country, driving the peaceful people
into the mountains and forests and kill
ing and making slaves of them. As
Kabba Regas is said to have many na
tives in slavery, a march into his terri
tory by British forces would seem to be
one of the probabilities of the near fu
ture, the plea being apparently that
ivaDDa .Kegas capital is a place where
the Arab slavers find an asylum and
headquarters Thus it is apparently
safe to presume that the kingdom of Un
yoro ruled by Kabba Regas will soon
form part of the territory of Uganda,
over which the British government is as
suming a protectorate.
', DEATH OF A PEER.
The Notorious Marquis of Aylesbury
' Dies in London.
. London. The 'Marquis of Aylesbury
is dead. He owed $1,250,000. He mar
ried Dolly Lester, the music hall singer.
His title falls "to Lord Henry Augustus
Brundell Bruno. The Aylesbury estates
are entailed, and therefore the uncle who
inherits the title also comes into the es
tates, including Savernak Forrest.- It is
said Sam Lewis, the money lender, loses
heavily by the death of the Marquis, al
though he holds policies amounting to
500,000 on the life of the deceased no
bleman. The Marquis of Avlesburv was
one of the most notorious men in the
British peerage. His family are the di
rect descendants of Robert Bruce, and
own the celebrated beveranke estate.
He chiefly distinguished himself in his
younger, days by driving down Cheap
side dressed as a coster-monger with a
donkey, and lately was ruled off the race
courses in England on account of cheat
ing. Latterly he tried to sell the estate
to a rich brewer for 700.000, but through
the efforts of his family the sale fell
through. :
. War in Balmy Isles.
Auckland. Advices from Samoa un
der date of March 28 say that since early
in March there has been bloody conten
tion between rival native tribes, and al
ready over thirty ' natives have been
killed and fifty cruelly maimed. It had
been hoped that there might be a peace
ful settlement of the intertribal differ
ences, and it was with that end in view
that the warring factions submitted their
chiefs to a trial before Chief-Justice Ide.
This peaceful method, however, came to
naught. The loth instant the two fac
tions came together in actual warfare.
On that day a detachment from the Aana
or rebel party ambushed a number of
natives of Faasaleaga, Salvaii, who are
understood to be supporters of the gov
ernment. Several were killed. News
of the outbreak was received here dur
ing the progress of a consultation be
tween the President, Chief Justice and
Consular representatives. ,
New Atlantic Cable, .
London. The steamer Faraday has
left here with a portion of the new cable
of the Commercial Cable Company.
which is to be laid from Waterville on
Ballingsked Bay, coast of Ireland, to
Nova Scotia. The Faraday is not large
enough to stow the entire cable, which
will be about z.uuu miles long, and the
process of laying it will include the drop
ping oi about uu miles oi cable on this
side of the Atlantic, then the placing of
another 100 miles on the other side and
finally the splicing of both portions with
the main part. The new cable was made
by Siemans Bros. & Co. (limited) of Lon
don. The Siemans have guaranteed the
Commercial Cable Company that this
one will afford 33W per cent improve
ment in speed over any cable the com
pany now has in Use. This means that
thirty words a minute may be sent.
A Cruel Leader.
Berlin. Extracts from the diary of a
resident of the Cameroons were pub
lished here recently. The writer charges
Assessor Schlau, the Governor's substi
tute and leader of the Bacoco expedition,
with ordering the throats of old female
prisoners be cut. Three of his prisoners
are said to have died of hunger. Twelve
others were bound to the railings of the
snip lor days without drink, completely
exposed to the tropical heat and with
worms breeding in their wounded legs
and arms. When half dead they were
shot. It is reported that- Herr Leist,
Chancellor of the Cameroons, who is an
swerable for the recent floggings; Major
Wrochom, the acting Governor of East
Africa, and Major Francois, command
ing in Southwest Africa, will be recalled.
' In Boston, of Course.
"I'm going to get married," said he as ha
placed a hand as large as a Dutch cheese
upon the counter, "and I want a wedding
cake."
"It is customary nowadays," said the
pretty bakery girl, "to have the materials .
of the cake harmonize with the calling of
the bridegroom. For a musician, now, we
have an oat cake; for a man who has no
calling and lives upon his friends, the
sponge cake; for a newspaper paragrapher,
spice cake, and so on. What is you calling,
please?"
"I'm a pugilist."
"Then you'll want a pound cake." Texas
Sittings,
f Tanned by the Son. .A
-Life.
Her Little Trap.
'If I do say it," said Mr. McTwombly,
"I've got a wife who knows more in a min
ute than any, other woman I ever met knew
or knows in a century. She's a wonder."
"What's she been doing now, McTwomb
ly?" asked McTavish.
why, she ought to have been a manl
She just worked a scheme on methat Bhows
her to be possessed of the true temperament
for promoting big enterprises and Retting
all the money, or for going on Wall street
and buying stocks on the right side of the
market. She's a wonder.
"Now, she's just worked a scheme on me
that shows her supreme financial ability.'
About a year ago I came home to dinner
one night and found her hard at work sew
ing. Just as I entered the room in which
sbe was, she straightened up and said.
How many buttonhoUf do you think I
have made this month?' I told her I hadn't '
the first idea. 'Well.' she said proudly.
I've made over a hundred.' I suppose that
100 buttonholes are a good many for a wo
man who has so many things to do as Mrs.
McTwombly has, but I felt a bit sportive,
and I began to guy her, telling her that any
child could make that many in half a day
and stuff like that. i ,
. "She got mad, and if I had taken the
warning and quit I would have had more
money- -today than -1 nave. ' - Well,? she
snapped, 'I think 100 buttonholes are a
good many, and, what's more, I shall prob
ably make 1,000 before the year is out, for I
have a good deal of sewing to do.' I kept
on guying, like the natural born ass that I
am, and she taunted me into making an
agreement with her whereby she was to
pay me a forfeit if she didn't make 1,000 in
a year, and I wag to give her a cent apiece '
for all that she did make, provided the num
ber ran over 1,000.
That was what she wanted. She put up
a job on me. Within a week she had bought
one of those patent buttonhole makers that
can be attached to a sewing machine and a
bolt of white cotton cloth. With those ma
chines you can make buttonholes faster
than a horse can trot. The year was up
yesterday, and that lovely woman presented
me with 50 yards of white cotton cloth lit
erally honeycombed with buttonholes. Ev
ery time she had a spare moment she sat
down at that machine and rat tied -off a few
dozen. I had to give her a check for $376.48, -and
it will be a cold day when I guy that
woman again." Buffalo Express. - ,
'"' In the Neck.
At the sound of approaching footsteps
the knight with the black mustache raised
his eyes in supplication,
"Guide me," he murmured, "O powers,
in this affair of the heart."
He waited with bated breath.
"Certainly," he argued with himself in
sudden apprehension, "this is the trysting
place.".
A shadow flitted past him. A mocking
laugh rang in his ears.
"Guyed me," be groaned. , . v
Then he groped his way hence. Detroit
Tribune.
i' .
His Old Master.
"De ole marster what I had befoah de
wah was a gennerman," remarked old
Mose to another relic of antebellum days.
"You bet dar was high toned Kennermani
in dose days," his friend replied. -
"Now you's talkin. I remember how
time and agin my ole marster kicked ma
off de front steps, and a minit arteward he
had done plum forgot all about hit. Der
ain't no moah sich gennermans nowadays."
Texas Sittings.
. Carried. .
Miss Frontpew Is it true that our new
tenor was arrested at Mrs. Goldmore's re
ception for forgeries he had committed in
the south?
Mrs. Hichurch Yes; he had just finished
singing "Carry me back to old Virginia"
in a way that brought a tear to every eye
when the Richmond sheriff came in with
requisition papers for him. Truth.
More Than He Could Stand. .
Cobble I hear you have left the firm you
were with. .
Stone Yes; they got too close for me.
Cobble What did they do?
Stone Dol Great Scott, old man, they
wanted to give me a salary based on the
sales I madel Cloak Review.
. Her Reason.
" "Tis strange that it always Is easy
'. For a man, when he's mrtlng, you know.
To swear to a woman be loves her
By all that's above and below. .
"But when he Is truly in earnest,
- Tell me the reason, I pray, -a
Tis awfully hard to utter
The words that he fain would say?"
Sbe replied as her dimples deepened
"The reason is simple, forsooth.
Tis because it is awfully bard, sir, ,
For a man to utter the truth."
,.- , -Life.