The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, May 28, 1892, Image 4

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"How do Ilookt"
That depends, madam, upon how
you feel. If you're suffering from
functional disturbances, irregulari
ties or weaknesses, you're sure to
"look it." And Dr. Pierce's Fa
vorite Prescription is the remedy.
It builds up and invigorates the
Bystem, regulates and promotes the
proper functions, and restores health
and strength. It's a legitimate
medicine, not a beverage ; purely
vegetable, perfectly harmless, and
made especially for woman's needs.
In the cure of . all " female com
plaints," it's guaranteed to give sat
isfaction, or tho money is refunded.
No other medicine for women' is
sold so,. Think of that, when tho
dealer says something else ( which
pays him better) is "just as good."
" Times have changed." So have
methods. ' The. modern improve
ments in pills arc Dr. Pierre's Pleas
ant Pellets. They help .Nature, in
stead of fighting with her. Sick
and nervous headache, biliousness,
. costivenoss, and all derangements
of tho liver, stomach and bowels
are prevented, relieved, and cured.
"I have been afflicted with bilious
ness and constipation for fifteen years
,and first one and then another prep
aration was suggested to me and
tried, but to no purpose. A friend
recommended August Flower and
words cannot describe the admira
tion in which I hold it. It has given
me a new lease of life, which before
was a burden. Its good qualities
and wonderful merits should be made
knovn to everyone suffering with
dyspepsia and biliousness." JESSB
Barker, Printer, Humboldt, Ka's.
fitf f.MPLANATION
AWLiNSWER,
I IS
.. , sc-
Why, tt is a pleasant and
remedy for - the positive
offective
cure of
Chapped Hands, Poison Oak, Salt
Rheum, Eczema, Sun Burn, Tan; pos
itively removes Freckles, and Is one of
the grandest luxuries for gentlemen
after shaving. This Is an exquisite
article prepared with the greatest care
by scientific experts. Its component
parts are perfectly harmless, and the
ladies toilet Is not complete without It.
One trial wMI convince the most skepti
cal that what wa say of W1NTERILLA
- -
Is true.. For sab by all druggists In
25c and BCc bottles. '
Tower?
'SH BMW
Iroprovd
FLICKER
i$ Guaranteed
Ltj-, Abioluttly Water.
AT00'-
Slickers hive V S,p.
bside the Fish Bnni Qm. (JL
Thaoemak on every Coat a
5oft W.oolen 'Cf
WatCh Out! Collar.
' Send f
A A TOWER, MFR. BOSTON, MASS Catalogs
WALL PAPER
PARQUET -FLOORING
If you lnlend to paper, write for samples. We
cat) supply you with all grades, from 5 cents per
roll (8 yardf) upwards. State for what rooms,
colors, light or dark.
COOKS BROS.,
043 Market St., San Francisco.
& POWDER CO.,
18 CALIFORNIA ST., SAN FRANCISCO.
If you want POWDER for Mining,
Railroad Work, Stump Blasting or Tree
Planting, send for Price List.
C0RRUG1TED IRON
ROOFING,
Metallic Skylight, Iron Cornices.
J.C.BAYER, Portland, Or.-
sMgUSt
FlO W6F5'
;l mCflf Dynamite
a a u in j
J II ritV Assayer and Analytical Chemlt
. n. MulX, Washington St., Portland, Or
S, P. N. U. No 441-8. F. N, TJ, No, 518
THE PASS WAS SAVED.
Experience of a Brooklyn Party In Catch-
Inj a Jay Street Ferryboat.
"I never went to tho Jay street ferry
except once," said a Brooklyn man,
"but on that occasion I had an experi
ence that I shall long remember. There
was a lady from Chicago visiting at my
house, and she had planned to go home
on a certain day by a certain train. The
fact is she had a pass, and unless she
got that particular train the pass would
expire before she could make use of it.
My wife and I were going over to see
her off. I tried my best to get them
started early, but they were confident
that there was plenty of time, and it
was impossible to hurry them. At
length, however, we got under way,
with just time enough to reach the
train if we had good luck.
"We took a car to the Broadway ferry
and crossed over to Grand street. I
am not sure that we might not have
made better time if we had gone over
the bridge and down Chambers street.
However, at Grand street we took the
little one horse car that runs across
town through Canal street and down
Washington street within one block of
the ferrv we wanted to reach. I never
saw a cifr go so slowly in all my life,
and the worst of it was that I was un
familiar with the region through which
we were going and with the route, and
I couldn't tell how far we were from
our destination. '
"At length we came to a full stop,
and looking out I saw a big truck
blocking our way. There was no driver
on it and no apparent reason why it
might not be turned out of the way
with very little trouble. , But, to my
dismay and disgust, the driver of our
ear calmly tied up his lines and perched
himself on the dashboard of the car,
Just as if it was . no matter to him
whether he and we stayed there half
an hour or not. ' And there was that
pass expiring moment by moment
inch by inch, as I might say. I was
growing desperately nervous. So
rushed out on the platform, pressed a
half dollar in the hand of the driver
and said :
" 'Now I want you to get me to Jay
street by such and such a time. , It is
very important. I must be there with
out fail. Can you do it?"
, ' 'Indeed, and that I can,' was his
answer, and before the words were out
of my mouth he was off the car and
turning the big truck out of the way.
Then you ought to have seen how he
spun along. He fairly whipped that
horse into a run, and we tore down the
street in fine shape. It mnst have been
a new experience for the horse. Well,
the upshot of it was that we got to Jay
street just as they were hauling in the
planks and closing the gates. I shout
ed to them to hold on, as two ladies
were coming, for I had run on ahead
and my companions had not yet en
tered the ferry house. The dock
t-enongh to wArrToT-s
Tl jrwttion of a minute and the ladies just
tenv ""- .o,?sVl had time to step aboard as the signal
i&tion of a mil
to start was given. I didn t even have
a chance to bid our friend good-by, ex
cept to shout it to her as the boat be
gan to move out of the slip. But that
pass was saved I
"The next time I take a friend to
Jay street I shall allow an extra half
hour's leeway, especially if we go by
the street car that runs down Washing
ton street.." New York Tribune.
The Ways of the Finest.
Cumso Isn't an accident In New
York a terrible thing?
Banks Is it worse than an accident
anywhere else?
Cumso Of course it is. I saw a man
get his shin scrapsd yesterday, and
while he stopped to rub it a crowd
gathered. Then a policeman rushed
up with his club and three men were
taken to the hospital in an ambulance.
Munsey's Weekly.
Ho. Should Have Felt at Home.
There was once a Sir James Weir
Ilogg, who made a fortune in India,
and whose wife, holding a distinguished
position in London fashionable circles.
gave splendid parties. It is said that a
young blood, meeting one of the Misses
Hogg at a ball, and not knowing her
name, asked her if she was going to
the party at the "Piggery." Her re
ply was: "Oh, yes; I am one of the
litter." San Francisco Argonant.
Getting a Good Lobster.
Those who do the marketing and
have to buy lobsters are often bothered
to pick put a good one. Here is a
good rule to follow: If you examine a
lobster that was alive when thrown
into the boiler you will find that the
tail is curled up to the body, while one
that was dead has the tail extended.
In buying lobsters this is a good thing
to bear in inind. New York Journal
Jews In France.
One of the greatest Frenchmen since
the first Napoleon, Leon Gambetta,
was, like Lord Beaconsfleld, of Italian
Jewish descent. Fould, one of the
ablest modern French ministers of
finance, was a Jew; and the Roths
childs and other Jewish bankers and
merchants stand high socially in Paris.
INDIAN DEPREDATION
PENSION
I
PATENTS
LAND
HOMFSTFAD I POST&l
C ''LAI Ml S
The "EXAMINER" BUREAU of CLAIMS
ONDKB THE DIBBCTION OF
San Francisco Examiner.
you have a claim of any description whatsoever
against the United States Government and
wian it apeeauy aqiuaicaiea, aaaress
JOHN TVEDDERBURN, Manager,
613 F street, N. W. Washington, . C.
WHY HE WAS LEAVING THE TOWN.
An Undertaker Explains How Ungrate
ful gome People Can Be.
"I remember," said the colonel, when
the party reached the end of t a good
dinner and the waiters stood behind
the chairs with lighted matches, "I re
member an incident which stamped
npon my mind the fact that when a
man has an eye for business he has an
eye for nothing else."
. The colonel tells a story well, and
paused here, waiting for the cigars to
be lighted, and for the inspiring fra
grance of the Havanas.
"I shall not tell you how long ago it
was, for I am getting too old to speak
lightly of decades. ( But when I first set
foot and it was a tender foot, let me
say in Hugo, Colo., I at once conceived
a great respect for a man named Hig
gins. I could not help feeling a rever
ence for Higgins. Higgins was an un
dertaker. He was the only undertaker
within a hundred . miles, and he was
getting rich. , Never a day passed but
my friend Higgins had a funeral on
hand. H e was the most cheerf u I under
taker, perhaps, that ever flourished.
- "1 remember well the day that I
bade Higgins good-by. He-was as light
spirited as a grasshopper, and a thou
sand times expressed his regret that I
was going into the interior, until I felt
clammy lest he might be grieved at the
thought that some one else might have
the profitable job of burying me. .
"When I next saw Higgins it was
after a two years' experience of chasing
wild steers. I was glad to see him, he
was such a jolly old undertaker.
" 'Hello, Higgins,1 I said cheerfully
when I walked into his establishment.
'How are you, old man?' ,
"Higgins shook his head mournfully,
and then I stopped short in amazement,
for I saw that he was nailing down
boxes and packing up his stock.
" 'You aren't going to move, are
youf I cried in surprise, but he only
jammed a roll of crape into a dry
goods bos and went on with his work.
" 'See here, Higgins,' I cried, 'what's
the trouble? Tell me about it.'
: . "The old man turned on me wrath-
fully. 1
" 'Ain't I been one o' Hugo's best
citizens?' he asked sternly.
"You have, Higgins.'
" 'Ain't I paid my taxes V '
" 'You have, my friend.'
" 'Didn't I organize a board of edu
cation?' '
" 'You did.'
" 'Wasn't I its president T '' "
, " 'You certainly were and a good
one, although we haven't any school
yet.'
" 'Didn't I head the citizens' move
ment for law and order?'
" 'You did, Higgins.'
" 'Well, that's all Now, how do
you think this pesky town has treated
its foremost citizen ?'
" 'Tell me, Higgins. ;You have my
I-Ul-Kltllj.
" 'Well, I was makin' a decent Iivin'.
I let out contracts for the only brick
building In the town.' .
" 'Yes.'
" 'I was goln' to call it the Higgins
block. I was goin' to let the volunteer
fire department have rooms in my block
for nothinV I proposed to have a tem
perance union in the town. I hoped to
have a free library. You know I'm a
progressive citizen, don't you?'
" 'You are, Higgins.'
" 'Well, what do you think this town
has done to me?'
" 'Surely nothing bad, Higgins.
" 'Nothing bad l' he screamed. 'Do
yon know what they've done? . They've
jynched Bill Smith, and if ever there
was a cowardly blow aimed at a fore
most citizen it was that.' r
" 'But you can bury him, Higgins.'
" 'Bury him I' he screamed. 'Bury
him I Bury Bill Smith I Why, man,
Bill Smith was makin' a fortune, for
me. He killed his man as regular as
the sun went down, and I buried every
one of 'em. He was worth $25 a day
to me, he was. So I'm goin' to leave
'em.. This town don't offer no induce
ments to an honest man like me.
Think what I've done for 'em. I was
goin' to erect a monument to our de
parted brothers. And now there won't
be a death In this town once a month.
Poor Bill I' and Higgins seized a wind
ing sheet and tried to stifle his sobs."
New York Tribune. ' ; ...
Dr. Vincent.
Acting Chancellor George E. Vincent,
of the "New Chautauqua," is described
as a strongly built man, with a bright
eye and genial manner. , He has won
derful executive ability and manages
affairs at Chautauqua with remarkable
tact. As a public speaker he has few
superiors. He lias frequently addressed
audiences of from 4,000 to 6,000 per
sona Few men are more ready with
expedients than Mr. Vincent It Is
very seldom, indeed, that he is discon
certed. If a break or hitch in the pro
gramme takes place he sees his way out
of the difficulty at once. Mr. Vincent
is a graduate of Yale college. He is a
great traveler, and has visited almost
all of the principal enlightened coun
tries on the face, of the globe. His resi
dence is at Buffalo. New York Tele
gram.' - . -
' A Bat Hunter.
A pet snake on a farm near Parkers-
burg, W. Va., is said to be an indefati
gable exterminator of rats and mice. J
. . T - ., j 1 J T , 1 1 1 1
J mi, as me repuie is caiieu, is per
fectly tame and docile, and answers to
his name as promptly as the family dog
or cat. He is fond of being petted by
the family, and seems to highly appre
ciate acts of kindness. He is over
eight feet long, and has been an ad
junct of tliu farm for twelve years.
Philadelphia Ledger.
LOVE FOR. HUMANITY.
A Strong Desire for the Highest
Good and Best Welfare
of the World. -
THE GREAT WORDS OF GREAT MEN.
A Most Remarkable Array of Outspoten
Statements From Men of Mark
in Both Continents,
INTERESTING FACTS AND FACES.
. The orator before the Senate called
this "an age of progress." He was
wrong. "Progress" does not half ex
press it; it is an age of revolution.
Revolution carried on, not by armies,
but by discoveries, inventors and brain
workers. It is a marvelous age, an aga
WILLIAM EDWARD ROBESON, M. R. C. S. I.,
"h. K. Q. C I.
Late of the Royal Navy of England.
when the ordinary will not be accepted,
when the best is demanded. Our grand
fathers were content to travel in stage
coaches, to live in cabins and receive a
mail once a week. We demand palace
cars, tasteful homes and daily communi
cation with the world. It is the rapid
transit age ; the age of the telegraph and
the telephone. A man speaks to-day
and the entire world reads his words to
morrow morning. There are but twenty-
DR. K. A. GUNN,
Dean of the United States MediSal College, New
York, and Editor of the Medical Tribune.
four hours In a day, but forty-eight hours
are crowded into it.
We all know how we have advanced
materially. Do we realize how we have
advanced scientifically ? More than in
any other manner. Indeed, it has been
the advancement in science which has
caused the advancement in material
things. The discovery of steam per
mitted the railroad and the steamboat.
The development of electricity made
possible the telegraph and the telephone,
so that the development of the sciences
has been the real cause of all modern
advancement. ,
We will take, for example, one depart
ment of science, but the most important
department. One which affects our very
lives and happiness. Formerly the
trea'wnent of hitman ills was made a
matter of superstition, of incantation,
the same as it is by the medicine men
of the Indians to-day. Gradually emerg
ing Ironi such blindness, it was still a
matter of bigotry, of folly. What people
must have suffered in those days can
scarcely be imagined. They were bled,
they were cupped, they were leeched,
they were subjected to every device
whereby their vitality could be reduced
and their lives endangered. It is almost
a wonder that the race Eurvived.
; There has been an absolute revolution
in the practice of medicine and in the
treatment of human ills. Instead of un
dermining the vital forces by cupping
and bleeding, the vitality is, "now sus
tained in every possible manner. In
stead of tearing down we seek to build
up, Instead of increasing misery we
set-k to create happiness.
But the greatest advancement in medi
cal science has been made by discovery.
Harvey could afford to t-ndure the ridi
cule ot the world for revealing to it the
grand discovery of the circulation of the
olood. Jenner might be ostracized, but
millions have benefited by his discovery
of vaccination. Pasteur lived in a more
a
?
enlightened age and escaped ridicule,
while the world received the benefit
which his discoveries have brought.
Koch, although forced to reveal his dis
covery before its perfection, will be re
vered by future generations. .
The discoveries of these great men
have been of .untold benefit to the
world, and yet they were not in the line
of the world's greatest need. Mankind
has been suffering, enduring, dying from
a cause far greater than f mall pox, more
terrible than hydrophobia ciid more
eubtle than consumption. The habits of
modern life, the very inventions which
have made civilization so great, have
drained the-vital forces of life and under
mined the organs that sustain life. Ten
4
vA
r
years ago this great truth was realized
by a gentleman whose own life was in
sore jeopardy, and the discovery which
he has given to the world has done and
is doing more to-day to strengthen the
vitality, lessen suffering, preserve the
health and lengthen life than any of the
discoveries of the other great men above
mentioned. The discovery referred to
was made by Mr. H: H. Warner of
Rochester, N. Y., and is known in Eu
rope, in America and throughout the
world as Warner's Safe Cure.
It may perhaps be thought that the
above assertion is an extravagant one,
and so it would be were not the unques-'
tionable proofs present to verify it.
Within the past few years the claims
made more than ten years ago have been
admitted by the highest scientific au
thorities, both in Europe and America,
and it is with pleasure that w.e prpsent
herewith some remarkableNreproduced
mi J; -
DR. BEYER, OF JVUHZBURG, GERMANY.
statements, together with the faces of
the men who made them.
Kidney troubles, resulting far too often
in Bright'a disease, are the great evil of
modern life. They frequently come sir
lently and unannounced. Their nres- -
ence tar too oiten is not realized until
their treacherous fangs have been fixed
upon the vital portion of life. Nothing
can be more deceptive for their symp
toms are varied in nearly every instance.
Thousands of persons have been their
victims without realizing or knowing
what it is that afflicted them. Thou
sands are suffering to-day who do not
know the cause. The following out-
spoken words, however, show what won- .
derful things this great . remedy has ,
i k r . w T T 1 i i
0 i.ijwuysvij!
" V vigil. J V " " wV Tt tlO DUUUIJIg
from functional kidney trouble. I took
the usual treatment ; but, the prepara
tions beinsr bad to the taste. I bought a
bottle of Warner's Safe Cure, soarpelv
thinking I would derive any benefit from ,
DR. DIO LEWIS.
9 SS .
it; but in a short time I was well again.
I did not take all of one bottle."
Albert W. Hendricks, M. D., West
Philadelphia. Pa. : "In Wnmer'a Hi
Cure the profession have an article much
needed. I have successfully treated
cases of Bright's disease and diseases to
which the female sex is subject with it
ana i cneertuuy recommend it as an in- '
valuable remedy for-kidney,.: liver or.
bladder difficulties." . . .
T. Jones, M. D., Albany, Ga. : "I
have used Warner's Safe Cure in the
case of my son for diseased kidneys, fol
lowing hemorrhagic yellow fever, with
perfect success." - ,
The discovery made by Mr. II. H.
Warner has bflen ai-l.nna7li.rIwofl th,nn..u'
out both hemispheres to be the onlydis
covery for this rreat modern evil now '
known to the world. Like all great dis
coveries, it has had its enemies and met '
with opposition, but its marvelous pop
ularity with the public has been' phe
nomenal and its cninnloto or-b
. J' - w -VIUfUTIKU
, j , piu.ccaiuno
has been deserved. It stands, as it de
serves to siana, upon a plane of its own, .
I ' " - Jiiuuiiucub U1.1- .
coveries for jthe relief of humanity and
' ,