4 A
HftiyQRDjLtJRIBUNI
"Everyone In Southern Oregon
! TIM Mill Tribune"
fiib'uihiid Dally except Saturday by
MEDFORD PRINTING CO
S3 North Xu J51- PhjJ"-"1
" ohnt nT w RbHL. Editor
9E5BCHBY M..rlllnl "
ERIC W ALLEN JR. Mn Editor
?.5t J'uRAMio V.W Editor
BiCHARD JEWETT. Spo'rU Edlto.
tttv GTHtrHK.n Women I Ediloi
BALE ERICKSON, ClrcuHUonJVIir
An Independent Newapapei
nt,-it ucond cla matter at
Medford. Oregon under Act ol
March 3, 1807
SUBSCRIPTION RATES
..... - iriuanpl
IDitly and Sundy-1 y"
Dally and Sunday-6 mo 10.00
Daily and Sunday 3 moa S00
Sunday Only-One year . 5.00
Single Copy (Mailedl 20
y Carnei-And Motor Route
Dally and Sunday-J year SJl.OO
Pally and Sunday 1 mo. 1.T5
Carrier and Vendor! .Copy 10c
Official Paper of City of Med'ord
Official Paper of Jcliao County
United Presi International
Jul) Leaied Wire
tJ P 1 Telepholo Newiplcturea
TMEm'bER-Of AUDIT BUREAU
u unujwii"".'"-
ATES Ol'lcea In New York. Chl
eaio. Detroit, 8an Francisco Lot
, An.e'w. Seattle. Portland
Anselea.
Denrer.
NIWtPAflt
PUIlIf HIS
ASSOCIATION
NATION A I fOITOMAl
Mem tier California Newipapcr
Publliheri Afiociatlon
Flight o' Time
Medford end Jackson County
History from the files of The
Mali Tribune 10, 20. 30, 40
and 50 yeara ago.
10 YEARS AGO
July S. I'M (Sunday) '
Laying of the Medford
Jacksonville water main has
been started by the firm of
DenHerder and Strobel of
Medford, according to Coun
cilman H. L. Markwlth.
July 4 was the first day
this yea: nat the temperature
passed the B0-dcgree mark, ac
cording to U.S. weather bu
reau officials; it was 91.
t0 YEARS AGO .
Julv . l43 (Mondavi
Thief tarries to cook sand'
wlch at Big Y Market.
From Arthur Perry's
Yc Smudae Pot" column
"Skunks are reported pestl
erously active In the rural
areas. Recent comparison
with John L. von Lewis is
believed to have goaded the
striped varmits to seek re
venge." 80 YEARS AGO
Julr S. 1333 (Wednesday'
Owen-Oregon mill to be in
complete operation by July
17.
Jury completed in fourth
ballot theft trial and testi
mony starts.
40 YEARS AGO
Julr 3. 1923 (Thursday)
Auto tourist travel through
city continues heavy.
Talent and Phoenix areas
hit by heavy rains.
SO YEARS AGO
Julr S. 1913 (Saturday)
Donald Helms killed in auto
race at fairgrounds.
Hugh DickBon rose wins
Greater Medford club contest
What's Your I.Q.?
Nina er ten correct It superior:
seven or eliht it aicellenti five ei
aii it aeod.
1. What is the name ap
plied to female warriors?
2. To what docs polyandry
refer?
3. In which National Park
is Quadrant Mountain?
4. In what year was the
tnost recent U.S. census of
population taken?
3. Where did Napoleon die'
6. Who wore bells on her
(oes?
7. Who was responsible for
popularizing the word "Ary
n '7
8. In what country would
you expect to find a geisha?
9. What is the singular
form of the word dice?
10. What name is given to
painting done on a wall?
Anawarat 1. Amatons. 2-
Plural husbands. 3. Yellow
ion. 4. 1960. 3. St. Helena,
. The Lady from Bambury
7. Hlller. I. Japan. 9. Die
10. Mural, or fresco.
COURT AND CATS
Olathe. Kan.-OIPB-The John
son County Probate Court had
matter before it today in
volvlng an $8,000 claim and
46 cats. Mrs. Florence Baker
asked the money from the es
tate of Mrs. Clara B. Murlln
who was the original owner of
the felines. She sought pay
ment for care of the cats since
1937.
Km.
FRIDAY. JULY S. 1963
Sly Price
Win Marks dropped by the other day to
express his concern over a little-publicized meas-
ure uncier consideration uy ungiess. u j caueu
a "quality stabilization" bill by its supporters.
But Senator Maurine Neuberger, strongly sec
onded by Senator Wayne Morse, say the name is
nothing more than a semantic device to disguise
the true purpose of the bill, which is actually a
"fair trade" or "price fixing" measure.
Both Oregon senators are concerned over
the plight of the consumer, who has no lobby of
his own, and they believe that this measure is
a dangerous one to the consumer and his pocket
book. :
T'HE bill would make
facturer to set, not only his selling or whole-
sale price, out also ine reran puce mat which
is charged the consumer.
Retail stores thus would be prohibited from
selling at a lesser price. The measure is aimed
chiefly at so-called discount houses. But it would
equally affect all merchants, and would limit
their discretion in setting the prices for the goods
they were selling.
The consumer, of course, would bear the
brant of this, since he could no longer "shop
around" for better bargains. But retailers, too,
wouiu De nmiiea in running men- own uubuicodco
SENATOR Neuberger, in commenting on the
hill nn the Senate floor the other dav. said:
"It Is becoming Increasing evident that the legisla
tion shrouded by that title ('quality stabilization') rep
resents nothing less than semantic warfare against the
consumer ...
"Hearings before both House and Senate commit
tees have revealed again that the only 'stabilization'
envisaged is the stabilization of the profits of ineffi
cient competitors and the stabilization of high prices
to the consumer . . .
"Such attempts to limit freedom of Individual mer
chants to sell goods at prices they choose are anti
thetical to the free enterprise system, hence to the best
interests of American consumers."
Her comments were strongly supported by
Senator Morse, who dropped a veiled hint that
he was willing to filibuster if it comes to a vote,
thus giving the people a
kind of a measure it really is.
Washington Correspondent Allen Hoffard re
ported, "And that may
this year.
Let us hope so. b.A.
Cold War
Having mentioned a
us now discuss a good
It is SS, introduced by
of Texas, and is known
Bill. It would extend to
forces who have served since the end of the
Korean war the same educational and loan privi
leges that were extended to veterans of World
War II and Korea.
It would, Yarborough
cational, vocational training, and home-purchas
ing opportunities to some
THE earlier versions of
GMattACcflll TVlOir All Q K
men to obtain an education
would not nave oeen ame to obtain otherwise,
thus putting them on the road to being produc
tive, taxpaying citizens. It also helped them tret
settled in their communities, adding to the local
tax rolls and stimulating
its cost in dollars was relatively high (al
though it was only a tiny drop in the bucket
if compared to defense appropriations), but the
benefits were far in excess of the cost.
The individual veterans benefitted, the econ
omy benefitted, society benefitted.
A BOUT the only logical argument which can
be mounted against a "cold war GI bill" is
that we are not now in a shooting war.
That's true. But millions of GIs in World War
II and Korea never saw action, and still were
entitled to GI benefits. If it was fair that they
get them, it is also fair that men who have served
since get them, for they have made the same
sacrifices as the vast majority of the wartime
veterans.
In addition to the fairness factor, it cannot
be emphasized too strongly that the entire nation
would be better off if these men are riven the
chance to improve their
ana iinanciany, mrougn
THS measure is similar
the late Senator Dick
fully. It appears to have
for it was reported out favorably the other day
by the Senate Labor and Public Welfare Com
mittee.
Veterans who had served a minimum of ISO
days would be eligible.
ice, they would be entitled to one and a half
months of educational benefits, with payments
ranging from $110 per month for those with no
dependents to 5100 for
one dependent.
Senator Yarborough commented:
"This bill will open the doors of school for ..e
Ullon veterans. It is an Opportunity Bill for the vet
n and tha nation it will give another forward
trust to American education. It will help education,
unemployment, and our economy now and In the fu
ture. This bill covers an area of critical need."
We agree. E.A.
r
Fixing Bill
it possible for a mam
chance to find out what
be that, for 'fair trade'
GI Bill
bid bill in Congress, let
one. e
Sen. Ralph Yarborough
as the "Cold War GI
veterans of the armed
estimates, open up edu
five million veterans.
the GI bill were highly
li-ii-l mi'lllnnn a linilH n-
which they very likely
the economy.
own lot, educationally
sucn a program.
to the one promoted by
Neuberger, unsuccess
a better chance now.
For each month of serv
those with more than
"Remember the Good Old Day When
They Were Inscrutable?"
Communications
Letters to the Editor must bear the name and address of the writer,
although under certain circumstances the usa of a pen nama or initial
for publication It permissible. The Mail Tribune reserves the right to
edit all letters with a view to clarification and condensation. Letter
tubmltted for publication must not exceed 400 words. The letters
printed In this column do not necessarily represent the views of the
paper, in tact ine contrary is o:ien
Seeks Belongings
To the Editor: A lot of goods
held in my name by a storage
firm of Medford was sold
at auction last Saturday after
noon without notice to me.
Many personal items, birth
certificates, pictures, e t c,
which can have no value to
anyone else are' now in pos
session of people in and
around Medford.
Other memorabilia, scripts,
transcriptions, tapes, etc., of
radio and television programs
which I wrote and sometimes
produced were in the lot auc
tioned off. These are the ac
cumulation of years on radio
and television in San Francis
co, New York City and Holly
wood. They are the only
copies I kept of years of writ
ing such programs as "Double
or Nothing" in New York,
The Navy Bulletin program
with Glen Gray and his or
chestra, "This Is Your Life"
and many other programs on
national and international ra
dio and television.
If you could publicize the
facts, I am sure that many of
the people who now have my
scripts and programs would
be willing to surrender them.
Since being hit with polio, I
have been unable to keep an
office, and storage was the
only place I had for safe
keeping. Mr. Franklin had
agreed in writing to notify
my brother if these goods
were to be sold, otherwise
this would not have happened.
F lease do what you can to
give notice to the purchasers
that I would like my personal
property at least. Thank you
(or anything you can accom
plish in this respect.
Paul M. (Mel) Vickland
Post Office Box 14
Northridge, Calif.
Bravo
To the Editor: "Bravo" to
Mr. L. C. Powell of 318 S.E.
Eighth St., Grants Pass, Ore.,
for his well-written Letter
to the Editor entitled "Insult
ing the Readers."
My congratulations, Mr.
Powell, for saying what many
believe to be true.
Dale R. Price
413 Park st.
Medford.
Labor Leadership
To the Editor: Speaking as
a long time member of organ
lzcd labor and with several
years experience on the exec
utive board of the Oregon
Council of Carpenters, and In
light of events of the last sev
eral months, I am led rciuc
tantly to the conclusion that
organized labor in Oregon Is
in dire need of new blood
among its elected leaders.
When the present state
Board of Control formulated
the plan to have new work
done on state penal institu
tions by unpaid prison labor
instead of legitimate contrac
tors it was, of course, in con
flict with every principle of
organized labor, but when the
Governor cried on the shoul
dor of certain labor officials
with the plea that he would
have prevented such action if
he could, they knew that he
knew the other two members
of the Board would go ahead
with the plan. And they knew
the other two members were
cogs in the same political ma
chine with Mr. Hatfield.
Yet these officials of organ-
tzed labor seemed to accept
his protestations at face value
and It was only by the firm
action of rank and file mem-
bers at the state convention
that such leaders were pre
vented from endorsing his can
didacy for governor in the
1962 election. An endorse
ment he did not have from the
membership.
From the time the so-called
"three way bill'1 came before
the Oregon Legislature, sup-
MEDFORD MAIL TRIBUNE, MEDFORD. OREGON
tne esse.
ported by the state Republi
can organization and certain
dissident Democrats, it has
been clear that its purpose
was to emasculate the present
state accident plan for the
benefit of the private insur
ance companies. True, the
present law needs amend
ments to bring It up to pres
ent day standards, and the
proposed law, narrowly de
feated in the last days of the
1963 session, would have in
creased the amount collecta
ble and broadened the base
of those covered. It would also
have largely turned control
of the plan over to the private
insurance companies, and that
price was too high to pay for
the small advantages gained.
Despite the Governor's pro
testations many people will
continue to believe that the
summary dismissal of two
members of the Accident
Commission was a spite ac
tion triggered by their failure
to work for the emasculation
of the Industrial Accident law,
but perhaps the most discour
aging exhibition was on the
floor of the Lower House in
its final hours before adjourn
ment when certain labor un
ion officials worked frantical
ly for the passage of a law
that would have been a dis
tinct disservice to every work
ing man in the state.
D. Ivan Fritts
974 Fortner lane
Ontario, Ore.
Anti-Annexation
To the Editor: Because the
Anti annexation Committee,
made up of residents South
of Ashland, believes that
every citizen lias the right to
know all of the facts relating
to a step as serious as that
of annexation or Incorpora
tion of any territory, it Is
preparing a series of public
ietters through which the facts
and findings of this committee
will be presented to the peo
ple. This letter is directed main
ly to the people residing with
in the corporate limits of the
City of Ashland and to whom
this question is posed:
Can you afford further an
nexations? Have you taken the time to
look into how much any furth
er annexation of territory by
Ashland will cost you?
Ashland's chief source of
revenue is the cit" levy you
now pay. If the city takes on
further annexations and the
added expenses to provide the
necessary services to the area
annexed, what do you think
will happen to your taxes? It
was estimated at the Ashland
City Council meeting that
just for those costs that were
presented then, it would prob
ably amount to at least a 6
mill additional levy.
Proponents of annexation
claim that areas annexed
would receive at least a 75
per cent decrease in Fire In
surance rates. This is not en
tirely true because, since fire
rates are set by our State Fire
Insurance Authority, It is not
guaranteed that an annexed
area can qualify for place
ment in the same fire zone
as that of the annexing city.
The City of Ashland has
mentioned no plans for addi
tional water supplies to pro
vide this service to any an
nexed areas. Are you willing
to share your present water
supply?
How about police protec
tion? There seem to be two
choices. If Ashland accepts
any further annexations, it
will either have to increase
its present police personnel,
at an added expense to the
city taxpayer, or you will
have to share the police pro
tection offered at the present
level.
You, the citizens o Ash-
Draft-Goldwater Movement Under Way;
Stop-Goldwater Reaction Expectable
By LYLE C. WILSON
United Press International
Tho draft-Goldwater move
ment has taken off, and the
stop-Goldwater movement is
revving up to
fly. Thursday
night at the
National
M Guard Arm-
" . . lr .. u
ury in rraan
ington, D. C,
took place the
National Draft
Goldwater In
depend e n c e
Day Rally.
This was a flamboyant notice
to Sen. Barry Goldwater (R
Ariz.) that the nucleus of a
political organization is de
veloping to obtain his nomi
nation for president.
Strictly
Personal
By Sydney J. Harris
c Field Enterprise!. Ine.
MONEY QUESTIONS
Our naive and pathetic na
tional faith in "question
naires" and their results was
again demon
started recent
ly, when a
news story
out of Wash
ington dis
closed that the
govern ment
has decided to
find out what
A m e r i cans
Harris think about
money and investment.
The U.S. Census Bureau is
going to sample 3,600 families
in 100 areas in an effort to
obtain statistical data on pub-
lice attitudes toward "dispos
able income."
In a formal statement, the
Bureau said, "This informa
tion can be obtained only
from the individuals involved
and will be of great help to
those responsible for the na
tion's monetary policies."
What we think about tha
uses of money, and how our
practices square with our
expressed thoughts, will
neyer be told to tha govern
ment or to anyone else -because
we ourselves are
confused, contradictory, and
the truth is buried deep in
our own unconscious moti
vations. Money, like sex, is a sub
ject that cannot be ver
balised adequately. It car
ries too much psychic
weight, it means too many
different things on too
many levels, it has a sym
bolic significance that goes
far beyond any canons of
prudence or common sense.
Any experienced broker
will tell you that even tha
customers who voluntarily
coma to him for counseling
and investment won't re
veal their real motives in
many cases, because they
are not aware of them. They
will say one thing and mean
another; they will take only
the "advice" they vera pre
pared to take before they
stepped into his office.
What they really want -
again in money as in sex - is
the child's fantasy of omni
potence to come magically
true for them. They want to
make an Investment that will
do everything for them -give
them rapid growth, quick
profits, absolute security, and
prove to themselves that they
are both sagacious and the
favorite of the gods.
Money has many meanings
for everybody, and some of
these meanings go far back
Into childhood; how else ex
plain the multimillionaire
who becomes panicky if he
loses a few ihousand in one
month, or the men who make
and lose several fortunes in a
lifetime? They may seem to
be rational businessmen, but
they are driven by irrational
forces that have nothing to do
with the reality of the present
situation.
What people answer to ques
tionnaires is what they think
the questioner would like to
hear, or what makes the best
Impression, or what they may
sincerely (however mistaken
ly) believe about themselves.
A questionnaire may, more or
less accurately, tell us what
someone thinks about some
one else; never what he feels
about himself.
land elected -ri.in gentle
men to represent you on your
City Council, and if further
annexations are considered by
them it is your duty and
privilege to let them know
your feelings about it, or can
you AFFORD to allow further
annexations?
The Anti-annexation
Committee
Milton Hamilton.
Chairman
790 Tolman Creek rd.
Ashland. Ore. v
run
' afc :,;-.
aaaaaViriMaj
The stop-Goldwater move
ment is less evident. It is in
the works, however. It Is a
rule of politics that when one
In the Day's News
y FRANK JENKINS
The news as this is written
on July 3?
There isn t much.
In East Berlin, Old Kroosh
says he regards rresiaeni
Kennedys performance in
West Germany last week as
a "dangerous development."
Why dangerous? Well, he
thinks our President was try
ing to pull Germany clear
over on our side.
He thinks that would be
bad business.
N THE Congo jungles, a sen
ior lecturer on animal psy
chology and a photographer
are sitting in a tree with a
lot of toys. The scientist says
they will stay up there three
months so that the Congo
chimpanzees may become ac
customed to their presence.
Then they will pass the toys
down to the chimps. If the
chimps PLAY with them, it
will be another sign that man
descended from monkeys. And
in Chicago a dental specialist
says thumb sucking by young
sters is a good habit. He says
children who -are avid thumb
suckers seem to have fewer
cavities than those who don't
suck their thumbs.
When that kind of stuff gets
into the headlines, it means
that there isn't much news.
T WAS different 187 years
ago.
On June 3, 1776, the Found
ing Fathers were putting the
final touches on the final draft
of the Declaration of Inde
pendence. On that day, Rich
ard Henry Lee of Virginia
had moved In the Continental
Congress that "These United
Colonies are and ought to be
free and independent States."
Twenty days later, on the
evening of July 3, 1776, the
immortal document was com
pleted and the next day, July
4, it was adopted, and the
United States of America
came into being.
There was no dearth of
NEWS then.
VJOR was there any dearth
of news on July 3, 1863,
100 years ago. At dawn of
that fateful day, the Union
artillery began to play upon
Culp's Hill, which the Confed
erates had taken the previous
day. After a bombardment of
several hours, the Union in
fantry swept up its slopes and
recaptured it.
General Lee had massed his
artillery along the crest of
Seminary Ridge. He had de
termined to RISK EVERY
THING on a grand assault on
the Union Center if Culp's
Hill fell to the Federals. There
was dead silence for a half
hour. Then Lee's artillery
opened up. It roared for an
hour and a half.
rpHEN
a General Pickett, at thp
head of 15,000 picked men
moved out. They moved across
an open field a mile wide. The
Federal artillery tore great
gaps in their ranks. But never
did the line of gray uniforms
halt or waver. It pressed stead
ily on. As it came within
range of the Federal muskets,
its ranks were mowed down
like grain by a reaper.
But
Practically at the mouths of
the cannon, the line broke.
Only a few men reached the
Federal line at the Bloody
Angle. Only a handful were
left to retrace their steps
across the valley of death
And that was that.
The Battle of Gettysburg
was over.
lllORE than 40,000 Confed
'erates were killed, wound
ed or captured during the
three days, of whom 6,000
were left dead on the field
The Ninth Virginia regiment
went in 250 strong, and only
38 men came out. The Eighth
Georgia lost 24 of its 32 offi
cers. Of the 24 field officers
in Pickett's division, only two
escaped unhurt.
There was PLENTY o(
news 100 years ago.
Two Missing in
Clackamas County
Oregon City -fl?l- Searches
were under way today for a
65-year-old man and an 8-year-old
boy reported missing
in different areas of Clacka
mas county.
Terry Anderson, 8. Port
land, was believed lost near
Camp Howard about 12 miles
northeast of Sandy, police
said. The camp is a Catholic
youth facility.
Deputies said the boy may
have walked away from the
camp.
John Feldman, Milwaukie.
was reported missing near
Estacada. following an Inde
pendence Day picnic.
individual becomes a front
runner, all others gang up on
him. Another well known fact
of politics is that you cannot
beat somebody with nobody.
That is to say, If you want
to withhold the convention
delegation of Pennsylvania,
for example, from Aspirant
A. then vou should offer some
other individual to whom the
delegation may be committed,
if only for a short time.
Thus it was. that Pennsyl
vania s Gov. wunam w.
Scranton said last month that
he may be his state's favorite
son candidate tor' tne iwo
Republican presidential nomi
nation. A favorite son gives
convention delegates a tem
porary place to roost and a
strong point from which to
bargain before committing
themselves to a major candi
date for the presidential nomi
nation. Scranton cannot be brushed
off, however, as a minor
candidate. Republican Nation
al Chairman William E. Mill
er recently listed Scranton,
Goldwater, Gov. Nelson A.
Rockefeller of New York and
Michigan's Gov. George Rom-
ney as the four men among
whom his party will find its
1964 presidential nominee.
It follows that Romney and
Rockefeller will be pressured
openly to join the stop-Goldwater
movement. Rockefeller
already is in and running on
his own account, although not
publicly committed. Romney
coy but is likely, at tne
least, to be Michigan's favor
ite son candidate next year.
The stoppers will need others.
They will look among states
with Republican governors or
U.S. senators, but not among
all of those states.
Can We Stick
With Peanut Butter?
By Arthur Hoppe
Manv neople can't under
stand why we have so much
surplus food in our ware
houses and yet so many
hungry families in our land.
The solution is simple. We're
growing the wrong kinds of
surplus food. Take peanuts.
Our Nation, as you know, is
up to here in peanuts. And
yet we have to keep paying
the peanut , farmer to grow
more surplus peanuts or
they'll get mad. But It's cost
ing the taxpayers millions to
store the surplus peanuts.
Which aren't hay.
Then the Department of Ag
riculture had a wonderful
idea: "Let's", said the Depart
ment, "make peanut butter."
Which we did. And we be
gan giving away a half a
pound of peanut butter a
month to each poor person
under the surplus food dis
tribution program. Great. The
peanut farmers were happy,
the Department of Agriculture
was happy, the taxpayers
were happy and the poor
were full of peanut butter.
Except, of course, the peanut
butter magnates. In fact,
they've now hired a lobbyist
in hopes of scuttling the
whole program.
Why? Because, angrily says
Mr. George Heufelder, presi
dent of the Peanut Butter
Manufacturers Associa 1 1 o n,
foisting free peanut butter on
the poor people is giving pea
nut butter "an unfavoriable
image".
.
You can't deny that. Al
ready, very few first class
restaurants list peanut butter
sandwiches on their menus.
And it's rarely served now at
State Department banquets.
Not t'.ie formal ones, anyway.
Soon, no doubt, any housewife
who dares serve Peanut But
ter Supreme aux Champig
nons will be drummed out of
her bridge club.
So you certainly can't
blame Mr. Heufelder for
I hate
M J I
i a j
Recently from Denver h
was reported that Colorado!
Republicans were organizing
a western bloc of convention I
delegates around the favorite I
son candidacy of Sen. Gor
don L. Allott, (R-Colo.). Tnis
was interpreted as a maneuver
to consolidate Goldwater')
Mountain States strength. The
stoppers, in turn, undoubted
ly will seek to enlist Call.
fornla. The governor there ill
a Democrat, but one senator
Thomas H. Kuchel, is a Re-1
publican. Kuchel probably I
would feel at home in a stop-1
Goldwater operation.
Polls indicate that Rocke
feller's remarriage to a di
vorced woman flipped Gold-
water ahead. There have been
various polls in recent weeks,
all of them reflecting an up
surge of Goldwater strength.
Sentiment at recent Repub
lican gatherings seemed to
concede Goldwater's steadily
increasing prestige.
The Republican National
Committee met recently in
Denver. Some headlines over
the Denver story:
Washington, D. C, Post:
GOP strategists see Goldwa
ter far ahead.
New York Times: Goldwa.
ter stock rising among GOP
leaders.
Scripps - Howard Washing
ton, D.C., News: Goldwater
htolds lead over Rocky.
The equally well-edited Na-
tional Observer thereafter
canvassed the Goldwater sit
uation and reported: Gold
water boom rocks the ranks
but pros are cautious.
Goldwater himself wants
to know more about the boom
and draft in his behalf before
committing himself to run.
worrying about the image of
peanut butter. It's his life.
But the problem remains:
What can we feed the poor
people? Whatever we feed
them will get its Image
ruined. And obviously what
we have to feed them is some
thing which few people like.
Some food that doesn't have
a manufacturer's association,
Peanut butter is just too
popular to give the poor peo
ple. Or, to put it another way,
it's too good for them. And
I'm sure Mr. Heufelder will
join with me when I say, "Let
hem eat pate de fois gras."
.
The only foreseeable prob
lem with a Surplus Pate de
Fois Gras Distribution pro
gram is that, at the moment,
we don't have any. But that's
merely because we don't pay
our farmers to produce too
much of it. And once we have
established the proper sub
sidy program, it will be com
ing out our ears. Our experi
ence with wheat, cotton, soy
beans and butter proves this
beyond doubt.
In no time, our peanut farm
ers will be plowing under
their peanuts to plant pate de
fois gras. The poor people will
bo stuffed with it. Its image
will nosedive. And it will be
replaced on distinctive menus
by "Pate de Cacouette
Creamy Style or Crunchy
Style".
This will save the image of
peanut butter, nourish the
poor, occup our farmers,
busy our Department of Ag
riculture and continue to im
poverish the taxpayers. Which
all shows that if we must
grow too much food, let's grow
too much food hardly any
body likes. So that we can
give it away.
And if you criticize this
solution merely for being
ridiculous, it just shows you
still don't understand the na
ture of the problem.
your
I