Quips and Quotes
The. Saga of Billy Smith
When Billy Smith was only three,
He knew what he was going to be;
He knew, without his parents' nrgin',
Thut he would someday be a surgeon;
To prove it, Billy marched upstairs
And eat the legs off several chairs.
When Billy Smith had grown to four,
He knew what fate had put in store,
He knew deep down inside his chest
He'd be a gnnslinger out West;
He took his gun and with precision
Slung it through the television.
When Billy Smith accomplished five.
He knew what trade would make him thrive;
He knew one day in early summer
That he was meant to be a plumber;
He battered pipes down in the basement
Til water lapped against the casement.
When Billy Smith was thus concerned
With how his income would be earned,
His parents, whose careers were set,
Cave np their work with small regret:
The day that Billy Smith was six,
His folks were full-time lunatics.
Dick Kmmont
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4 i-ii
"Can I borrow a couple of dollart
until you increase my allowance. Dad?"
The husband took his wife to a baseball game
for the first time and carefully explained the
rules before things got under way. Then he
settled back, hoping to enjoy the game without
interruption. It was a close contest, and at one
point the husband excitedly exclaimed :
"Look, Hon, we've got a man on every base
right now!"
"What of it?" his wife answered. "So has
the other team." F. G. Kernan
The last time some husbands gave their
wives a helping hand was when they cat the
wedding cake. Dan Beimel!
HiiiiHnmmiiiimi
nunnnmii nil
Two tramps were huddled in an alley during
a chilly, rainy night, and one lamented: "This
is a terrible life! Nights on park benches,
cops chasing you, dodging from one town to
another, never knowing where your next meal
is, sneered at by everybody , . ."
"Well," the other tramp interrupted, "if it's
so bad, why don't you go out and find yourself
a steady jobt"
"What?" exclaimed the first tramp. "And
admit I'm a failuret" an Shurluck
Family Weekly, Jim J, 1M)
II