Quips and
Quotes
VI II
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u u u
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As the Boss Sees It
Creation only took six days
But that, for goodness Bakes,
Was something that occurred before
The days of coffee breaks.
Hal Chadwick
The neighborhood grocer was tell
ing a customer about the new min
ister who had just taken over duties
at the local church: "He's wonder
ful," the grocer explained. "And his
sermons are tremendous! Of course,
I haven't heard him yet."
The customer looked bewildered.
"If you haven't heard him, how do
you know he's so wonderful?"
"Oh, I can tell by the way his
parishioners are flocking in here to
pay their old bills," the grocer re
plied. Wilfred E. Beaver
A panhandler approached a passer
by and asked for a dime for a cup of
coffee.
"I'll be generous," the man re
plied, taking some change from his
pocket. "I'll give you three dimes for
three cups of coffee."
The next day the panhandler
chanced to meet the same man again.
"Say," he asked, "aren't you the guy
that gave me three dimes yesterday
for three cups of coffee?"'
"Yes," the man replied proudly.
"I'm the one.'1
"Well, you've got a lot of nerve,
buddy," the panhandler snapped.
"Do you know I didn't get a wink of
sleep all night?" F. G. Kernan
Never Too Old to Bum
She asked for my honest opinion:
A lot of our friends weren't so youthful,
But straight from the shoulder was the looking older?
She begged I be forthright and truthful.
Thus wheedled, I answered quite frankly.
I wasn't the slightest unpleasant:
Just what she demanded objective and candid.
And so we're not speaking at present.
Georgie Slarbuck Galbrailh
After returning from a shopping trip, a woman
realized she had lost her purse. She was about to
telephone the supermarket when the front door
bell rang.
On the porch was a small boy clutching the
missing purse. "Are you the lady who lost this?"
he asked.
"Why, yes I am," said the pleased woman. She
took the purse and opened it. "That's strange,"
she exclaimed. "When I lost this, it had only a
10-dollar bill inside now there are 10 ones!"
"I know," the youngster said sheepishly, "but
the last time this happened to me the lady didn't
have change." James Shurluck
"There goes the last one.
Now will you start raking?"
A businessman was puz
zled by the announcement
that his old friend's wed
ding date had been post
poned two days. Worried,
he telephoned the friend.
"I hope nothing has gone
wrong," he said.
"Well, it almost did," the
friend replied. "You see, I
figured out our silver wed
ding anniversary would fall
on a Saturday, and you know
I always play golf on Satur
days." Joseph Sherman
Family Wwkly, October 21, IM2
"Moisture-Proof"
your baby against
diaper irritation!
i M I . mm ml . s- -.-J
' ..,, -r",,,, '. . . !:.'
Z. B. T. protects like oil soothes like
powder) See for yourself. Smooth Z. B. T.
Baby Powder on palm of hand, sprinkle
with water. See how it runs off without
penetrating Z. B. T.'s protective sheath.
There's proof that Z. B. T. Baby Powder
with Olive Oil repels irritation-causing
moisture, where ordinary baby powders
absorb it. Guard your baby's tender skin
against urine scald, diaper rash by using
Z. B. T. Baby Powder after every bath and
diaper change! Guards against chafing,
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Used by hundreds of hospital nurseries.
Also look for new Z. B. T. Baby Lotion
ZB.T. I
I RETARDED CHILDREN
I CAN BE HELPED
Backache &
Nerve Tension
SECONDARY TO KIDNEY IRRITATION
After 21, common Kidney or Bladder Ir
ritations affect twice a many woman
men and mar make you teme and nerroua
from too frequent, burning or Itching
urination both day and night. Secondarily,
rou may lose sleep and auffer from Head
achea. Backache and feel old, tired, de
pressed. In auch Irritation, CYBTEX
usually brings fast, relaxing comfort by
curbing Irritating germs In strong, acid
urine and by analgesic pain relief. Oet
OYSTEX at drugglaU. Feel better fast.
efliirv
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QUICK I
with ju,t a few dropt of
3-IN-ONE. Pnlrole
hard-to-gal-at place
Dottn't oum UP.
3-ino:jeoil
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