Q MAIL TRIBUNE, Medford, Qf. B Thursday, Jan. 21, 196C
Bing Crosby's Reunion With
Sons Big Event of Past Year
Editor's note: For years, the
Crosbys of Hollywood gave the
public impression of being a hap
py, carefree family. But recently,
the image has undergone consid
erable blurring. Like other parents,
Bing and his brother Bob have
naa serious problems with their
rebellious offspring. And Bob got
"" an almost tragic fight with
his wife that made purple head
lines.
This is the first of two dispatch
e on what's wrong with the Crns,
by's. It tells of Bing's fight to win
back his sons after deciding he
nan failed them badly.
Lindsay - made a verbal truce he had given them "too much
By RICK DU BROW
UPI Hollywood Writer
Hollywood - IUPD - No Acad
emy Award could match the
prize that Bing Crosby won
in 1959.
For that was the year he
regained the confidence of the
four sons he thought he had
failed as a father - although
not even he could prevent
their hot Irish tempers from
causing continuous arguing
among themselves.
To win his boys back, Bing
had to tarnish the illusion -built
up over three decades -
that he was a happy-go-lucky
fellow untouched by the usual
run of human problems.
But,' said a friend, he felt it
was worth any sacrifice-even
losing face - to heal the fam
ily breach.
Failure Believed
Thus, although Hollywood
had heard rumbles for some
time, the public was taken
aback in March when Bing
told an interviewer:
"I think I failed them (the
boys) by giving them too
much work and discipline, too
much money and too little
time and attention. . . .
"It seems that maybe we
got out of the habit of com
municating. You've got to get
kids talking to you ... I never
had much success talking with
mine."
This was Bing's opening
right then and there by rush
ing to his defense.
Said Philip: "Pop's done a
wonderful job, considering
what he had to work with.
Only Gary, 26 - Bing's old
est son - held out. He remain
ed silent.
Some Reasons
Why the silence? Why the
bitterness? And how did it
start in the first place? Here
are some of the reasons ac
cording to Hollywood insiders:
-All the boys were deeply
attached to their late mother,
Dixie Lee Crosby, and a cool
ness developed when Bing
married 23 - year - old actress
Kathy Grant in 1957.
-Gary, nearly half a year
older than Kathy, was espec
ially cool. And it was report
ed he had sharp words with
her when she put his mother's
mementoes into storage.
Lindsay's 1958 Christmas
presents to Bing, Kathy and
their baby son were returned
because he decided to spend
the holiday with Gary in Las
Vegas, Nev., instead of with
his father.
-Gary, who is very close to
Lindsay, seethed over the in
cident. -Gary criticized "all that
propaganda Pop spread about
us wanting to be ranchers.
You remember all that busi
ness about us working 12V2
hours a day at 33 13 cents
an hour. We always wanted
to be in show business."
Bing discreetly remained
silent to Gary's criticisms.
Instead, he began seeing more
and more of Dennis, Philip
and Lindsay going to base
ball games and other affairs
with them.
Dad Was in Hock
His own boyhood explained
why he had worked his sons
gambit for peace, and three of
his sons - Dennis, Philip and on his ranch - why, perhaps,
The Family Council
Editor's Note: The Family Council consists of a Judge, a psychiatrist,
three clergymen, a newspaper editor, a women's editor and two writers.
Each article is a summary of an actual c ase history. The Council reports
n problems that have been dealt wi b by responsible agencies and
counselors.
Mr. J.H. - I want nothing
more to do with my son and
his wife.
Keith H. - We're the ones
who ought to be sore.
Mr. J.H. - My son, Keith, is
28 and has been married four
years to a girl my wife and I
never liked. We saw from the
beginning that she was spoil
ed
pecially those between hus
band and wife. This is certain
ly sound because each person
seeks support in his fight
against the other. Each tries
to put his own position in the
best possible light, slurs his
own sins and exaggerates
those of his opponent. The
only way an outsider can help
is by acting pretty much the
way a psychiatrist or mar-
We sure were right. Six I rage counselor would re-
months ago Keith came to me
and told me he was up to his
ears in trouble because his
wife had bought thousands of
dollars worth of clothing and
furniture on charge accounts.
He has been trying for years
to keep up with her spending,
but couldn't any more. He told
me they were breaking up and
I offered to help him out
financially to get him out of
debt.
And now comes the climax!
They are back together, all
lovey-dovey. I am disgusted
and I want nothing more to do
with them.
Keith H. - My wife and I
are the ones who shouldn't
have anything more to do
with my parents. Yet I am
willing to be friends and let
bygones be bygones.
My parents were always
very cold to Ada and hurt her
in many ways. When I told
my father about her spending,
he went on a rampage against
her and called her the worst
names. Later, when I started
to see the whole situation
more calmly I realized that
some of her spending made
good sense. It was a lot to
spend at one time, but she had
managed to get some good
buys.
In a couple of months I
will have paid back every
cent my father lent me and I
feel he has no right to hold a
grudge against me or Ada.
The Council: Two wrongs
were committed here and, of
course, they don't add up to
a right - for either side.
Keith had no business going
to his father complaining of
his wife's conduct. He came
to his father in the spirit of a
child who has been hurt in
the big, bad world outside
his home.
Even if he desperately need
ed financial help or advice
from his father, he could have
gone about it in a calm, rea
sonable way and then present
ing his problems in a manner
which would leave no open
ing for his father's "rampage"
aeainst his wife.
On the other hand, it was
up to Mr. J H. to keep his
own head when his son came
to him in an obviously hysteri
cal mood. He seems to have so
much hostility toward his
daughter-in-law that he used
the occasion to let it loose -rather
than to help his son
deal with his problems on a
more rational level.
Most well - meaning, clear
minded individuals make it a
policy never to get involved
in anybody else's disputes, es-
fusing to take sides but listen
ing and asking questions that
will help the individual see
his own error and solution.
This kind of objectivity is
certainly difficult for anyone
as emotionally involved as
these parents. We suggest that
they accept their son's mar
riage with good grace and let
him jump the hurdles on his
own.
(Copyright 1960,
General Features Corp.)
Grange News
Live Oak Grange
Live Oak Grange held its
first meeting of the new year
recently. All officers who had
not previously been installed
were installed.
All officers were present.
They are Master Frank Hall,
Overseer Fred Dengler, Lec
turer Jessie Frantz, Steward
Lloyd Smith, Assistant Stew
ard Raymond Frantz, Chap
lain Maude Dengler, Treasur
er Bethel Potter, Secretary
Belle Strahan, Gate Keeper
Lee Pratt, Ceres Betty Frantz,
Pomona Lillian Rowlison,
Flora Cassie Golding, Lady
Assistant Steward Esther Fa
brick, and members of the
executive committee, Letsy
Miller, Carl Christenson and
Philip Strahan.
Reports of standing com
mittees were given, and the
names of 22 candidates were
presented.
Permission for use of the
hall was given for the com
munity March of Dimes din
ner which tentatively is sched
uled Jan. 30. Community
service is one of the tenets of
the order.
Lecturer Frantz presented
a program consisting of group
singing, a guessing game, se
lected readings and New
Year's resolutions by the
members.
Refreshments were served
by Lula Trotter, Lillian Row
lison, Edith Osborne and
Marcia Brown.
PAYS SITTER FEE
Whitchurch, Wales - iUPD -
An insurance agent charged
with stealing from a prospec
tive woman customer was
ordered to pay a dollar for a
babysitter while the victim
appeared in court.
work and discipline."
"My dad (a bookkeeper for
a pickle factory) was in hock
most of the time," he said.
"We soon found out that there
wasn't a lot of money on
hand for baseball bats or
sodas or anything else. What
ever we got, we earned."
. Bing's desire to handle his
troubles with his sons quietly
stemmed party from the fact
that he' had expected prob
lems' after Dixie Lee died.
"Now that their mother's
gone," he said in 1954, "you
have to know what they're
doing, where they're going.
They're normal active young
men, and if you don't take
care of them, they might get
in trouble."
But the crooner's main
problem in reconciling with
his sons was Gary's touchy,
hot temper. In October, 1958,
Gary had a scrap with a busi
ness executive at a party hon
oring poet Carl Sandburg.
Last August, when he and
his brothers were doing their
act at the Sahara Hotel in Las
Vegas, Nev., he tried unsuc
cessfully to have a publicity
man fired for letting a report
er talk to him about his feud
with his father.
And in the act, Gary re
ferred to his father as "Kath
ryn Grant's husband" and
cracked: "We haven't receiv
ed so much applause since we
told Pop were were leaving
home." !
Gary To Miss Show
In addition, the younger !
boys looked up to Gary - at j
leasi xney am until monies
later in Montreal where their
differences with him broke up
the act, perhaps only tempor
arily. Now, Lindsay, Dennis
and Philip are scheduled to
appear on their dad's TV
show Feb. 29, but Gary will
be missing - throat trouble,
it was explained.
The boys' maternal grand
father, Evan Wyatt, had said
after their Las Vegas opening:
"Gary is the leader - always
will be. The younger ones
look up to him for leadership,
and he's more than happy to
take charge."
Bing, aware of Gary's in
fluence at the time, continued
to carry his peacepipe. In an
interview, he noted that his
sons were "all doing nicely
as entertainers" and that "it
may help my prestige around
them a little if I can do a
good job in their field."
"Besides," he said, ''the boys
have all grown too big and
carry too much thunder, and
I don't duck too - good any
more."
The reconciliation with
Gary finally came in October
- the day Bing's first daugh
ter, Mary Frances, was bap
tized. Bing made Lindsay the
baby's godfather, and friends
of Gary said he felt this wiped
out what he considered his
father's insult to Lindsay the
previous Christmas.
Wanted Invitation
The night of the baptism,
Bing caught his sons' show for
the first time at the Moulin
Rouge nightclub here. He had
never seen the act before be
cause he refused to attend un
less Gary invited him.
After the show, he went
backstage, conferred with the
boys privately for 20 minutes
- and when a photographer
asked for pictures, Gary smil
ingly threw his arm around
his father's shoulder.
For Bing, the reunion with
his sons however shaky
was the end of a long road
that might have caused other
stars to lose public support.
But the crooner, as usual,
handled matters typically in
an un - Hollywood manner
which once prompted an ad
mirer to write:
"Bing ... is so darned easy
for all of us to identify with.
He talks our language. He
sings our songs. His. kids got
into scrapes as ours did.
"He likes baseball and golf
and wishes he could pick win
ning horses. He whistles. He
goes to church on Sunday and
his conscience pinches over
what happened to his good
intentions the rest of the
week."
(Next: Bob and his daughter.)
We Give
GREEN STAMPS
CENTRAL REXALL DRUG
Main and Central
BEWARE
OF
IMITATIONS
LOOK
FOR THE
HAPPY
UTTLi 006
ftPPf
TOPS IN QUALITY!
LOW IN PRICE
CROSBY AND SONS Crooner Bing Cros- and Dennis. Crosby had
by, wearing hat, is shown with his four sons, a Hollywood night club
iU l61ii, iiimip, umusay, oary, rear, performing.
visited
where
(UPI
his sons at
they were
Telephoto)
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