Medford mail tribune. (Medford, Or.) 1909-1989, December 06, 1959, Image 49

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While millions listened, the voice that had brought him
fame faltered and was silenced; what happened to
Bill Stern that day at the Sugar Bowl was only
the beginning of the depths of despair he had to reach
before he could start the slow climb to personal victory
by BILL STERN
Last week Bill Stern told of the tragic car
accident which led not only to the amputation
of his left leg but, even worse, to his becoming
a victim of narcotics. In this concluding
installment, he tells of the humiliating depths
he reached and of his long painful climb up the
road to recovery and final victory over drugs.
Both installments are excerpted from his auto
biography, "The Taste of Ashes," written with
Oscar Fraley. Copyright 1959 by Oscar
Fraley and Bill Stern. By permission of Henry
Holt & Co., Inc., 383 Madison Ave., New York
17,N.Y.
A shattering psychological crisis arose in my
life in 1952 when the top brass at NBC
informed me that the important duties of
sports director were going to be taken away
from me and given to somebody else.
I was outraged at the decision. After all, I
told myself with furious bitterness, I had
organized the NBC sports department, and
now that it was running smoothly they were
casting me aside.
In retrospect I realize that I was a mental
and physical wreck even then, but somehow,
although I was constantly in the public eye,
I managed to conceal my condition from the
world.
I was rapidly approaching bottom, and my
work was suffering correspondingly, although
I stubbornly refused to admit it to myself. But
now I was requiring several half-grain injec
tions of morphine to satisfy my need, and I was
visiting the doctor almost daily. This meant
more sleeping pills at night, if I was to get any
rest at all, followed by the rousing effects of
Benzedrine in the morning.
The day finally came in June, 1952, when I
found it impossible to continue. It was mid
afternoon and I was lying on a couch in my
office in dull-eyed despair, racked by waves
of chills and fever, when Tom Gallery, who
had taken my place as sports director, came
in to discuss some broadcasting plans with me.
Family Weekly, December 6, 1959
His words seemed vague and distant, with
out sense or meaning, and my mind struggled
to grasp what he was saying.
Finally Gallery stopped talking and stared
down at me with a puzzled frawn on his face.
He inspected me silently for Tcveral minutes,
then, though the words seemed to be coming
from a great distance, I could detect the sym
pathy in his voice when he said, "Bill, why
don't you go home?"
All I remember of the rest of that day was
the startled look on Harriet's face when I was
helped into my house, and my own jumbled
thinking that now, at last, something would
have to be done, some resolute decision taken.
I agreed to go to a private institution to take
the cure. It was the first of two futile attempts
to escape my private hell.
At long last, on Jan. 2, 1956, came my per
sonal Armageddon.
The situation at NBC had slowly become
more painful, and I finally resigned to go with
the American Broadcasting Company. I took
along a sponsor's contract for a network sports
show at $125,000 a year. My personal contract
with ABC was for $55,000.
Professionally I was on top of the world
when ABC sent me to New Orleans to televise
the annual Sugar Bowl game. But it was to be
a day of shame, disgrace, and utter humiliation.
The visit opened on an ominous note when
I had difficulty locating a doctor who would
give me an injection. Complaining of my pains
and certainly looking ill, I talked him into giv
ing me what actually was an overdose, the
night before the game. Before going to bed, I
left a call for 7 in the morning. Later that night
I complicated matters by taking an overdose
of sleeping pills.
From that moment on, everything is a bad
dream. I recall awakening and summoning the
doctor who had given the injection the previ
ous night. At first, he refused to give me
another but finally yielded to my pleas. When
he had done his job and left, I passed out