1 4 MAIL TRIBUNE, MOM, Or.
" Monday, Sept. 21, 1959
Family
Council
Ellen L. . She compares
men to her late husband.
Greta J. - I can't help it -he
was so wonderful.
v Ellen L. - My sister is a
widow in her early' 50s. She
has a married son and daugh
ter and is living by herself.
Greta's husband has been
dead for five years and I tell
her it is high time she started
looking around for another
man. She is healthy and good
looking and there is no rea
son why 'she should spend
the rest of her life alone.
i ve ioia ureta to join.
some organizations ' to meet
people. She joins and then
gives up after a couple of
weeks. Occasionally she has
gone out with a man, but she
always compares him to her
late husband. I feel this is a
big mistake but I can't con
vince her. '
Greta J. I know that it's
. not the right thing to do, but
I can't help making compari
sons. My husband was -such
a wonderful man so hand
some, generous and kind.
There couldn't be another
like him. '
When I visit these clubs
my sister recommends, I am
always amazed and upset at
the number of women in my
situation. All they are inter
ested in is men - and there
just aren't enough men our
age to go around.
I really would like to meet
a nice, companionable . man,
but it's easier said than done
- especially for a fussy
.woman.
The Council: Unfortunate
ly, Greta is in a poor frame
of mind at this time to meet
a companionable man and
form a desirable match.
She aDDears to have fallen
into a pattern of self-pity and
anger with the world at her
lonely situation.
When Greta sings the
praises of her former husband,
it is not purely to honor him,
but a way of detracting from
some other man. Compari
sons of this sort are ugly and
unreasonable. Greta is really
calling on some unknown
force to view her , loss and
unhappy fate. This blinds her
to any good qualities the new
man may have -,and he un
doubtedly has them. : -,
- When Greta enters an or
. ganization to jneet people,
she bears a chip on her
shoulder. She does not go in
with the idea of being help
ful and companionable to
others. She wants to take
something from the group
and is hurt and frightened
when she realizes that it is
not going to be handed to her
on a silver platter. Other peo
ple in the organization . have
needs too. Greta is appalled
at the sight of the other
women with the same idea
she has. She takes a very
harsh view of them, but a
very kindly, pitying one of
herself.
. Underneath, Greta is fright
ened at her situation and has
taken refuge in coddling her
self. But this will never bring
her a fuller life. When she is
ready to make a - contribu
tion to others, she will lose
her fears and her loneliness
at once. The man with whom
she would like to share the
remainder of her 1 . life may
suddenly appear without her
looking.
(Copyright 1959.
General Features Corp.)
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