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Some June graduates apparently think that
a sheepskin is for pulling the wool over the
boss' eyes. Frank G. Mc1nni$
We've Channeled Our Emotion
She sees a melodrama
That leaves her shedding tears.
Her husband snickers at her
In act, he almost jeers.
"You're being awfully silly
To weep about their woe.
You shouldn't waste emotion
On folks you do hot know."
He turns back to the TV
(His is a different case).
He yells and shouts and bellows
When a man rounds second base.
Lavonne Mathison
The father had taken his nine-year-old son to a movie without
paying much attention to the billing. That was a mistake. The
feature proved to be a torrid love film that was bound to raise
some delicate questions.
During one prolonged embrace, the father heard the boy say,
"Wow!" and readied himself for a lecture.
"Didja see that, Dad, didja?" the boy whispered. "Didja see the
muscles in that guy's arm when he squeezed herl"
My Daughter's Being Educated
The Language Barrier
The climate of our slang has changed.
It's certain, as a rule,
What Mamma in her day called hot,
The kids now say is cool.
Alice McClure
Some modern educators and a travel
agency recently talked me into believ
ing a trip to Europe this Summer would
contribute to my daughter's knowledge.
Here are excerpts from her letters:
Took a boat on the Tems River arid
saw the Tower of London where sev
eral queenes, including Mary Queene
of Scotch, were beheaded. Also saw
Madam Truso's Waxworks with rep
licas of such people as Muscleleeny
and Richard the Line-Hearted. . . .
Visited Reems, France, which is the
shampain district and saw how sham-
pain is made and tasted some. Also
saw a statue of Joan Dark. ...
Got to Venis and road in gandolers
on the canals and saw the famous
Bridge of Size. Fed the pidgins in the
great square in front of St. Marx. . . .
Had wonderful time in Florence
(they spell it Freeze here) and saw
pictures by Mikeangelow, Leonard D.
Vinchy, and others. Didn't have time
to see the runes of Pompay. . . .
In Paris and saw the Loover and the
fishermen on the Sane River and Noter
Dame Church and the Latin . . . .
Parke Cummings
fbuiwliiart . giMasaMss-rtUftSlS
I WAS JUST THINKING...
If you hear I've been playing golf,
I want everyone within shot, pref
erably car, to take the comment as
lightly as I hit my drives.
Actually, they're not even a short
trip. And there's little purpose in my
"addressing the ball." It won't make
it to its destination anyway. I have
occasionally tried stamping it, but
only into the ground.
My volunteer instructor said that
even Ben Hogan had to start some
where. I have often wished I knew
the place.
It took some time to learn to bear
the grip. Mine consists of interlock
ing fingernails which tend to cut
through to the bone on either hand.
"Now, pretend you're holding a
towel against your side between your
arm and your body," said the in
structor, ignoring my agony.
I inserted my elbow into my float
ing rib, which promptly would have
been if it weren't already. If you feel
that's a confusing statement, you
should have been me.
I bent my legs and flexed my
knees. It was all I could do to keep
from sitting down two feet off terra
firma. I raised the club and managed
to hook my elbows under my clavicle.
The instructor seemed to be cough
ing. Or was he chuckling?
"Everybody makes a few mistakes,"
he murmured. "Let's try a hole."
I did that right away. I made a
dandy hole in front of the first tee.
"Aim at the green!" the instructor
shouted, but I couldn't see it from
where I stood. I looked for it all the
time I was swinging at the ball. After
the six strokes through the trees, it
took me 12 more to get to the green.
It was a warm morning and the
golf bag was heavy. Every time I
picked up the ball, it squirted out of
my hands farther than I could hit it.
I could have swum across the Eng
lish Channel faster.
We played for four hours. One was
a water hole and the water was dirty.
One was a woods hole. I think a
groundhog ran away with my ball.
f
One hole was alongside the railroad
track. Everybody on the train was
laughing.
But my family was amazed when
I went home and proudly told them
my score of 47.
I forgot to mention that was for
three holes.
14
Family Weekly. July 12, 1S