(Advertisement)
Afraid of being conspicuous because you re hard of hearing?
How a dramatic new invention revolutionizes concealment of tearing loss,
Prayers Answered for
Deaf Who Won't Wear
Regular Hearing Aids
By Paul Harvey SSST
The Sport of Slings
Skiing fans of either sex
Are optimistic dreamers
They never think they'll break
their necks,
Their fibulas or femurs!
But every ski-train bringing back
Those doughty Bends for action
Returns without some Jill or Jack
Whose leg is now in traction!
Ruth Chadwick
"I just cannot see," said a newlywed
wife to her husband, as they gazed in a
furniture-shop window, "how they make
all that furniture out of those crinkly little
walnuts."
Journeyman Barber
It Couldn't Happen Here?
Boris Pasternak, Russian writer whose
anti-Communist novel won a Nobel prize,
was expelled from the Soviet Writers
Union for activities "incompatible with the
name of Soviet writer." Deplorable! Yet
if there were an American Humor Writers
Union, I'll bet I could get in serious
trouble if I:
Hinted men crumple more fenders than
women . . . portrayed a dad who helped
his daughter with algebra homework and
got the answers right . . . wrote about the
housewife who took second helpings of
dessert to keep from losing weight . . .
invented a poverty-stricken Texan or
worse, a plumber who showed up with all
his tools . . . featured a waiter who was
prompt and pleasant . . . suggested that an
all-American fullback reads and writes.
Parke Cumming
Science has never been able to produce
a temperature of absolute zero, but we
know a janitor who can come close.
D. O. Flynn
"I feel quite sure," the psychiatrist told
his patient, "that we have cured you of
your kleptomaniac tendencies. We can end
treatments."
The patient was vastly relieved. He
thanked the doctor profusely and was
about to leave the office.
"Just one more thing," the psychiatrist
called. "If you do happen to have a re
lapse, will you pick up one of those little
transistor radios for me?"
The teacher struggled to put a pair of
overshoes on a kindergarten boy. Only
after they were on did he explain, "I know
why they went on so hard. They're not
my galoshes, m'am."
The patient teacher pulled and tugged
to get them off again. Then the little boy
told her, "Nope, they're not mine they're
my sister's. But my mother makes me
wear them."
Christian Herald
Consolation for a Very
Young Lady
At dancing class,
A tall thirteen
Must stand, poor lass,
Like an uncrowned queen,
By dreams consoled,
Till her subjects call her
To the court she'll hold
When the boys grow taller.
Georgie Starbuck Galbraith
"And would you deprive her of music le$en$
simply because she has no interest and no talent?
Family Weekly, January 25, l5 II
You'll be thrilled to know
that you may now hear again
with NOTHING in either ear. Be
free of self-consciousness.
Scientists at Beltone Hearing -Laboratories
created an INVISI
BLE hearing aid, with no receiver
button, no tube, no mold in either
ear and no cords.
If you act promptly, Beltone
will rush you FREE a fascinating
new book with all the exciting
facts.
You'll thrill as you read why
you need no longer deny yourself
the joys of better hearing for fear
of being conspicuous. Now you
may stay actively happy in family
and social life . . . enjoy church,
radio, TV, movies.
This advertisement is published as a public service by Beltone Hearing Aid Co.
You'll be amazed to see photo
graphs which prove that nothing
shows, because everything is com
pletely hidden inside attractive,
lightweight Beltone Hearing
Classes, ideal for many folks who
are a little hard of hearing.
I urge you to act today so you
can receive the remarkable book
'that reveals the complete (Ira- '
matic story. Why suffer needlessly
another day from the strain of
hearing loss . . . when you may
now hear clearly again.
FREE book on request you
owe it to yourself to read the valuable
book that Beltone will rush to you ity
a plain wrapper. Write: Dept. 4-787 ,
Beltone Hearing Aid Co., 2900 IF.
36th St., Chicago 32.
Live your
"golden years"
-without
laxatives
Growing older doesn't mean you
have to take laxatives or "bulks"
that work unnaturally, uncom
fortably! Get ReguTol tablets...
and live your "golden years"
without laxatives. Regutol is not
a laxative. It's safe not habit
forming. Regutol simply makes
the moisture in your colon keep
waste soft for easy, natural elimi
nation. Thus Regutol restores
regularity as no laxative can
auyinutf saays! jsssy
i ry kegutol. 3U
tablets, $1.00.
-usu-
(MiBmkMaLfJ
Drive Safely
Backache 6
Jerve Tension
SECONDARY TO UDREY CMTATIOX
HIW YORK Special: Thank to new,
scientific laboratory formulation, thou
sands of men and women now escape
feellns old, tired. Irritable and depressed
from losing sleep and worrylnc about
"Bladder Weakness" Oettlns Hp Nlihti
or Bed Wetting, due to common Kidney
or Bladder Irritations, which often re
sult In secondary Backache, Headache
and Nervousness. In such cases New Int. w
proved Oystex usually (ires fluick, calm
ing relief by combatlni Irritating germs
In acid urine; and by relaxing, analgeste
pain relief. Safe for young and old. Get
Oystex at druggist. Peel better fast.
Now Many Wear
FALSE TEETH
With More Comfort
FASTKKTH, a pleasant alkaline
(non-acid) powder, holds false teeth
more flrmly.To eat and talk In more
comfort, Just sprinkle a little FAS
TEETH on your plates. No gummyv,
gooey, pasty taste or feeling, checks
"plate odor" (denture breath). Oet
FASTEETH at any drug counter.
Hemorrhoid Poin Relieved in Minutes
7ith New Decongestive Drug Formula
Science discovers a new decongrttive
drug formula which retracts hemor
rhoids in minutes relieves pain al
most instantly.
Immediately on contact it acts to
1 ) retract tortured hemorrhoid tissue,
ease strain; 2) relieve pain; 3) ward
off infection; 4) promote healing.
Called DeWitt's ManZan. the new
formula contains an amaiing decon
gestive drug widely prescribed by
doctors as a tissue-shrinking agent.
Today learn why so many hemor
rhoid sufferers are saying, "You ran
with Manan." Cet DeWilt'sManZan
Ointment or Suppositories.
Relax Jeruous Tension
to (End Sleepless Nights!
Sleep soutlly tkii tale way-t et mp
refretaed, with m "doped" feeliaf !
When failure to sleep is due to
nervous tension, take DORMIN
sleeping capsules. DORMIN con
tains a hospital -tested "tension-reliever-.
With this safe sedative
discovery, you swiftly drift off to
glorious, worry-free sleep I Awaken
refreshed, alert in the morning I
Contains no habit-forming
drugs I No other sleeping aid s a
.directly to the public has proved
so safe, so effective for so many
years I Oet amazing DORMIN,
$1.00 at druggist. Oet your regular
night's sleep or money back!