v I . ...
m
2 -a
l 'r----V
ii
4 funaay, August 24, 1958
MAIL TRIBUNE, MEDFORD, ORE.
Medford,Tribune
"Everyone in Southern Oregon
Reads The Mail Tribune'-
Published Daily except Saturday by
MLUtOKU PRINTING CO.
33 North Fir St. Ph. SP 2-6141
ROBERT W. RCHL. Editor
HERB GREY. Advertising Manager
GERALD LATHAM. Business Mgr.
tHIL. W. Al.Ut.-N JR.,
Managing Editor
EARL H. ADAMS, Citv Editor
HARRY CHIPMA.V. Teleg. Editor
RICHARD JEWETT. Snorts Editor
OLIVE STARCHER. Women's Editor
DALE ERICKSOX, Circulation Mgr
An IndeDendent NewsuaDer
Entered as second class matter at
Medford Oreaon under Act of
March 3. 1897
SUBSCRIPTION RATES
By Mail In Advance: Copy 10c
Daily and Sunday 1 year $15 00
Daily and Sunday 6 mos. 8.00
Daily and Sunday 3 mos. 4.25
Sunday Only One year $4 20.
By Carrier In Advance Medford,
Ashland. Central Point. Eagle
Point. Jacksonville, Gold Hill,
Phoenix. Shady Cove. Rogue Riv
er. Talent, and on motor routes:
Daily and Sunday 1 year $18.00
Daily and Sunday 1 mo. 1 50
Carrier and Dealers c o p y 10c
All xerms cash in Advance
Official Paper of City of Medford
ornclal Paper or Jackson county
United Press International
Full Leased Wire
MEMBER OF AUDIT BUREAU
OF CIRCULATION
Advertising Reoresentative
WEST-HOLIDAY CO.. INC., Of
fices in New York. Chicago. De
troit. San Francisco. Los Angeles,
Seattle. Portland, St. Louis, At
lanta, Vancouver, B.C.
NEWSPAPER
PUBLISHERS
ASSOCIATION
NATIONAL EDITORIAL
VV I I ASSOC'l ATrCtN
'I 1 Z7 W
Flight 'o Time
Medford and Jackson County
History from the files of The
Mail Tribune 10, 20, 30 and
40 year ago.
10 YEARS AGO
Aug. 24. 1948 (Tuesday)
The Veterans' administra
tion has completed plans for
rehabilitating the Camp
White hospital for use as a do
miciliary. Directors of the Jackson
County Community Chest met
last night to approve budgets
of participating organizations
and agencies.
20 YEARS AGO
Aug. 24, 1938 (Wednesday)
There will be 23 entrants
in the Mail Tribune-Scout Cub
midget speeder derby on East
Main st. Friday evening. .
From Arthur Perry's "Ye
Smudge Pot" column: "All
over the Northwest bones of
prehistoric animals originally
in possession of backbones
modeled after a cross-cut saw,
are being excavated."
30 YEARS AGO
Aug. 24. 1928 (Friday)
The Medford entrance to
Crater Lake park leads the
Klamath Falls entrance in
umber of travelers entering
the park.
Construction of the new
educational building at the
county fair grounds is pro
gressing rapidly.
40 YEARS AGO
Aug. 24. 1918 (Saturday)
Enthusiasm marked the
first meeting last night of the
Medford unit of the Univer
sity of Oregon officers' train
ing school.
Steelhead have begun dis
playing an interest in flies at
Grants Pass, and fishermen in
this area look forward to good
fishing .
What's Your I.Q.?
Nina or ten correct is' superior;
seven or eight is excellent; five or
six is good.
Who first proposed the Eu
ropean Recovery Plan?
2. A picaroon is a type of
cookie, horse, or thief?
3. The U. S. Supreme Court
never renders advisory opin
ions; true or false?
4. Name the living ex-Presidents
of the United States.
5. In which year did the
Boxer Rebellion occur?
6. ' Name the painter noted
for his famous '"Blue Boy."
7. In which Government
agency is the Bureau of the
Census?
8. Name the capital of
Haiti.
9. A "southpaw" pitcher
throws balls with which arm?
10. Would a fatuous person
be a stout person, or a foolish
person?
Answers: 1. George C. Mar
shalL 2. Thief. 3. True. 4.
Herbert Hoover and Harry S.
Truman. 5. 1300. 6. Thomas
Gainsborough. 7. Department
of Commerce. 8. Port - au
Prince. 9. Left. 10. Foolish
person.
Mother Backs Auto,
Runs Over Daughter
St. Petersburg, Fla. flJPD
Kim Kay Thoits, 15 months,
was run over and killed Fri
day by a car driven by her
mother.
Authorities said Mrs. Phil
lip Thoits was backing the
family auto out of the drive
way when the child moved
into her patlu
Voters and Workers
An appreciation of the unique, and perhaps
just a wee twist of civic responsibility, led iis to
"drop in" at the meeting Thursday night which
was intended to name a "spare tire" candidate for
district judge.
It was unique in that it was the first such
nominating convention called in Jackson county
in the memory of most residents (perhaps the
first ever).
But it was far from unique in that not enough
people were interested in a responsible judiciary
to give up an hour or so of their time to select a
candidate if needed.
THE American voter that non-existent indi
vidual who stands for a multitude has often
been characterized as apathetic.
Well, by and large it is true, "unless some bat
tle or some issue gets him sufficiently riled up
enough to go to a meeting, or vote in an election,
or even write a letter to the paper.
It is too easy for "the American voter" to let
someone else take on the difficult chores of poli
tics, and do the things that need to be done to
keep our popular form of government function
ing. THE Jack of enough people to make the nomi
nating convention a success is not an isolated
instance.
It is a rare thing when more than a corporal's
guard attends a meeting of the city council, or
votes in a school election, or attends a "candi
dates night" prior to an election.
But, thank the Lord, there are a few dedicated
souls who are sufficiently interested in public
affairs to go to nominating conventions, to vote
in school elections, and to leam about candidates
at first hand.
THESE are the people who will run for the city
1 council because they genuinely want to be of
service to their community, or consent to serve
on boards or commissions or committees for the
same reason.
And the same applies to the people who keep
the wheels of partisan politics going. However
much one may disagree with their political phil
osophy, one cannot but admire their gumption
and spirit in devoting their time and money to the
cause in which they believe.
These are the people who make democracy
work. More power to them.
But it should be remembered that this is gov
ernment by minority resulting from the lack of
interest of the majority.
Let us hope that the minority which governs
us continues to be responsible, thoughtful and
dedicated to the best interest of all. E.A.
Fort Clatsop
Southern Oregon, with Crater Lake National
park and Oregon Caves National monument, no
longer has a monopoly on the National Park Serv
ice which is a good thing.
Congress in the session now drawing to a close
voted to make Fort Clatsop a national memorial.
It is the spot where Lewis and Clark spent the
winter of 1805-06, at the Pacific end of their epic
trek across the North American continent a
journey which first established the United States
as a potential two-ocean power, and gave it a
claim to the riches of the Pacific Northwest.
The trip, ostensibly, was an exploration of the
vast Louisiana Purchase, but it served the Am
erican west as Columbus' voyage 300 years earlier
served the western hemisphere, opening up a
huge area for further exploration and settlement.
w m w m
PORT Clatsop National memorial will take its
place as a major tourist attraction.
It will include development of the area as a
public park, laying out the tract of the old fort,
and reconstructing the buildings to their original
size and appearance.
Perhaps more important, it will include dis
plays of "living history" which should do much
to stimulate people's appreciation of the west and
what it has to offer.
In purely economic terms, it will be of great
benefit to Astoria and Clatsop county, in that
some $300,000 will be spent on developing the
park and museum by the Park service. And more
important, it will serve to attract tourist dollars
not only to that area but to the state as a whole.
THE Oregon Statesman, in commenting on the
plans, also points out the tourist lure, and
adds:
"(It marks) . . . the terminus of the route followed
by these intrepid explorers from the Mississippi River
at St. Louis, up the Missouri, across the Bitter Root
mountains, down the Clearwater, Snake and Columbia
rivers to the shore of the Pacific. This exploration
along with the discovery of the Columbia river by
Capt. Robert Gray in 1792, did much to clinch the
. claim of the United States to the Oregon country.
The memorial is a fitting one for this great achieve
ment, and will become an important tourist attraction.
"Astoria reeks with history: close to the mouth
of the great river of the West which Gray discovered,
close to Fort Clatsop, founded by the Astor fur traders,
the one spot in the West "conquered" by the British in
the War of 18,12, location of the first postoffice and
customhouse, near Fort Stevens, the only fort on the
continent shelled in the war with Japan, this park,
along with the Astor column, will serve- as vehicle
for exploiting the rich local history of the area."
And, from a provincial viewpoint, Jackson,
Josephine and Klamath counties should welcome
this addition to the park system, for it will in
evitably help increase the patronage of "our"
national park and monument. E.A.
Dennis the Menace
SOLD' TO THE WAN HOLDING HIS HAND OVEf2
HIS LITTLfc BOYS MOUTH
Matter of Fact
ABOUT THE U. N.
New York In the last
fortnight the American gov
ernment has used the United
WTZwya Nat i o n s
and used is
the right word
. to distract
the country's
attention from
the total de
feat of the
Americ a n
policy in the
Middle East.
Josepb Alsop any
practical test, for example,
the President's loudly touted
speech to the General As
sembly of the U. N. was a
quite exceptionally unimpor
tant event. The President
looked well. He said what he
had to say with vigor and ap
parent conviction. He was re
ceived with the applause that
was due to his great post and
his obvious good intentions.
But in fact the President s
speech, and the program it
embodied, and the forthcom
ing U. N. resolution that will
probably endorse the Eisen
hower program in a qualified
way, are all equally meaning
less. They will not save Jor
dan or Lebanon from the, fate
that hangs over them. They
have not prevented Saudi
Arabia from accepting Egyp
tian suzerainty and this
seems to be what the Saudi
crown prince, Feisal, has just
done in Cairo. They will not
rescue Iraq. They offer" no
protection against Nasser to
Kuwait and the other oil
sheikdoms of the Persian
Gulf.
PREVENTING Gamal Abdel
Nasser's triumph in all
these countries has been the
sole object of America's Mid
dle Eastern policy, ever since
our government recovered
from its strange orgy of
smarty self -righteousness dur
ing the Suez crisis.
This American policy has
now been shatteringly de
feated, with incalculable fu
ture effect. What ha happen
ed here in the United Nations
has not altered or diminished
the defeat in any way at all.
In a democracy, ugly but
important facts that the coun
try needs to understand and
face ought not to be given a
hucksterish cover - up. The
U. N. has very obviously been
exploited to provide a cover
up in this instance. Hence it
must be admitted that this re
porter began his inquiry into
the present goings-on at the
U. N. in an unfriendly mood.
11HAT does one find, after
" making such an inquiry?
First of all, unhappily, 99
per cent of all the solemn
things that are said and writ
ten about the U. N. are pretty
much drivel. The lack, of prac
tical effectiveness of the
President's speech to the
General Assembly is only a
Try and
Hp
-By BENNETT CERF-
THE SUNDAY SCHOOL teacher had just told her young
charges how Lot was warned to take his wife and flee from
the city. "Lot's wife turned back," she concluded, "and was,
, j i :n -U
turned uuu a iuu ui an.
"I don't care a bit about
Lot's wife," confessed one
student. "Tell us what hap
pened to the flea."
Sign spotted in a Chicago
rathskeller:
"HER EIS TOCHAMP
AGNEAD RIN KDIVI NET
HATMA KESUS FORGE TO
TJRTRO UBLES. IT ISM
ADEO FONEDOL. LARSWOR
THOF WIN EAN DFOURD
OLLAR SWORT HOFBUB
BLES." Gaelic? Finnish? Not at all!
Just divide the letters differ
ently and what you'll come up with is:
"Here is to champagne: a drink divine that makes us forget pur
troubles. It is made of one dollar's worth of wine and four dollar's
worth of bubbles."
"A man wrapped up in himself," observes Walter Pitkin, "makes'
a mighty small package."
1358, by Bennett Cert Distributed by Ktts Features Syndicate, .
I"
By Joseph Alsop
symbol of the lack of prac
tical effectiveness of the
whole process, which is al
ways reported as though it
were effective.
By this, their own public
opinion, the United Stages and
the other Western powers
may be hampered and ham
strung by the decisions of the
U. N. But the U. N.'s decis
ions are meaningless to the
Soviet Union, as Hungary
proved. The U. N. will not
stop Gamal Abdel Nasser for
one moment, as present events
in the Middle East are prov
ing. The U. N. is even mean
ingless, to the grand Peck
sniffs of the modern world,
the Indians, as is proven by
the case of Kashmir. The
U. N. can hurt us, in other
words; but it is powerless to
police or hurt any nation
great or small that will not
be policed.
OUT this very fact that the
13 U. N. can hurt us still
needs to be considered in the
balance. For this reason it is
worth having a sort of Lyn
don Johnson of the United
Nations in the person of Am
bassador Henry Cabot Lodge
Jr.
The truth is that a double
standard of international
morality, typified by U. N.
Secretary General Dag Ham
marskjold, isnow an accep
ted fact. Hammarskjold and
the others like him ducked
and dodged and pleaded and
equivocated in order to avoid
doing anything serious about
the bloody massacre in Buda
pest. But Hammarskjold and
the others like him might
well have joined to inflict a
public humiliation on the
United States because of the
entirely bloodless, officially
invited landing in Beirut.
IIITH enormous efforts,
" Lodge has probably 'av
erted this kind of public hu
miliation. This, is already
something gained. Then the
U. N. cover-up is positively
convenient, when the great
nations of the West have de
cided not to stand by their
friends any longer, and wish
to put the best possible face
on their decision to throw
their friends to the wolves.
In reality, "the United
States has already abandoned
its friends in Lebanon. The
U. S. and Britain are also
quite plainly preparing to
abandon brave young King
Hussein in Jordan. (Remem
ber when we sent the Sixth
Fleet, and the President de
clared that Jordan's indepen
dence was essential to the
United States?) If such aban
donments are unavoidable, it
is no doubt better to transfer
the onus to the local parlia
ment of man.
So much, unfortunately is
all that any realistic man can
say in favor of these strange
U. N. goings-on.
Stop Me
T A rA HAPPENED
Today Cr Tomorrow
By Walter Lippmann
THE UNHEEDED ALARMS
A week ago Sen. John S.
Kennedy made a powerful
and impassioned speech about
the predic
tion, which is
widely sup
ported among
experts, that
within a few
years the So
viet Union
will be far
ahead of us
in the big
strategic mis-
Walter
Lippmann
sues. The
period of our in
feriority is estimated to be
from I960 to 1964 when the
Soviet Union will, according
to these estimates, have the
power to destroy our Air
Force and to devastate "85
per cent of our industry, 43
of our 50 largest cities."
Sen. Kennedy's speech was
applauded by the Democratic
Senators who took part in the
debate. But it was attacked
by Sen. Capehart of Indiana
who objected to it on the
grounds that in such a public
exposure Mr. Kennedy was
selling America short and
giving aid and comfort to the
Russians. This charge was
easily disposed of because the
fact of the matter is that the
speech contained nothing that
could be news to the Rus
sians, nothing hat has not
been said publicly many times
before. The most notable oc
casion when it was said be
fore was on Jan. 23 of this
year, during this session of
Congress, in the unanimous
report of the so - called Pre
paredness Sub-Committee.
rpHIS sub - committee heard
some 70 witnesses, inter
viewed some 200 experts, and
took about 7,000 pages of tes
timony. It reported unani
mously that the Soviet Union
leads in ballistic missiles and
in the number of submarines,
that it will soon surpass "this
country. in manned bombers.
It reported too what is
even more significant and
portentous, that "the Soviet
Union has a system-which en
ables it to develop new weap
ons in substantially less time
than the United States," and
that "the Soviet Union is
producing scientists and tech
nicians at a rate substantial
ly greater than our own coun
try." If this is true, the lead
of the Soviet Union will in
crease and the "gap" will not
be closed.
PERHAPS the most impor
tant question raised- by
Sen. Kennedy's speech is
why, in view of the sub-committee
report in January at
the beginning of the session,
he did not deliver this speech
until Aug. 14 at the very end
of the session. What has been
Washington Report
By William
RULE OF REASON
Washington The rule of
law is in danger in Little
Rock, but the rule of reason
ic in Hanffpr in
the national
political com
munity. Not often has
the country
seen a time
when temper
ate word and
action were
more needed.
wmSSs: wEt? Not in recent
times have all men noiaing
any responsibility had a
greater duty to have done
with the knee-jerk reactions
of emotionalism.
These are the conclusions
of some of the most elevated
people in Washington in both
parties. These people are not
panicky; but they are very
worried.
The harsh complications of
the racial issue have for the
first time produced the most
perilous of all situations to
common sense. For the first
time, the two extremes are
meeting not by intention but
in effect.
0RVAL FAUBUS in Arkan
sas has declared the Su
preme Court's school integra
tion decision to be "unconsti
tutional." He has thus, as gov
ernor of a single state, assert
ed an interpretive power over
the Federal Constitution
which that Constitution itself
has given only to the court.
Sen. Paul H. Douglas of Il
linois, a civil rights leader,
has attempted to have the
United States Senate express
its "full support and appro
val" of the court's decision.
This is only the other side of
the Faubus coin.
Governor Faubus was plac
ing himself above the Su
preme Court of the United
States. Senator Douglas, in his
later withdrawn move to "de
fend" that court, was hard
ly less thoroughly attacking
its integrity. Some of his lib
eral colleagues, notably Sen.
Richard L. Neuberger of Ore
happening between January,
when the alarm was sounded,
and August when Mr. Ken
nedy sounded it again? What
happened, it is plain enough,
is that the failure to respond
to the alarm was in both par
tie!", and that there is no dis
cernible difference between
the attitude of the Eisenhow
er administration and that of
the Democratic opposition. A
few Democratic Senators
have made speeches which
are on the record but the
party as an organization has
reacted to the warning as the
President himself has re
acted. The bi-partisan reaction to
the discovery that the Soviet
Union is forging ahead in the
race of armaments has been
governed, I think, by the hu
man propensity to prefer a
disagreeable fact which is
still in the future to a dis
agreeable remedy in the pres
ent. The danger period, ac
cording to these calculations,
will not begin for at least two
years. The remedial measures
to cope with it ought to have
been laid down in this session
of Congress. The bi-partisan
leadership has avoided the
disagreeable remedies, hop
ing that somehow the alarm
ing predicitions of Sens. Sym
ington, Jackson, and Ken
nedy, and of Mr. Joseph Al
sop, will not come true.
FDEED, so far as I know,
there does not exist an
agreed program of what the
disagreeable remedies are
Mr. Kennedy made a few sug
gestions but he offered no
program, and although the
Democratic opposition is very
critical of President Eisen
hower, there is no alternative
Democratic program before
the country.
Why is it like that?
I think it is because the
real problem the relative
ly greater speed of Soviet
technological development
canot be overcome by a
spending program alone. It
would be quite easy to push
Congress into new and bigger
expenditures. But what the
experts call the missile lag
is essentially a weakness in
American education and a
lack of seriousness in Ameri
can national purposes, when
there is choice between pri
vate pleasures and the public
interest. We are ' in competi
tion with a new society which
is in deadly earnest, and there
is no use pretending that
amidst our comforts and our
pleasures, we are serious
enough.
That is why, when the
alarms are sounded, we turn
over and go to sleep again,
(c) 1958 New York
Herald Tribune Inc.
S. While
gon, tried in vain at the be
ginning so to persuade him.
For if the Senate has the
right to "approve," or in ef
fect to ratify, a specific de
cision of the court, it has an
obvious right also to "dis
approve" one.
This is perhaps most of all
why President Eisenhower
himself has persistently resist
ed all efforts to force him not
merely to promise to enforce
the court's decree but to a"ap
prove" it.
IN THIS, whatever his fail
ures of leadership else
where on the racial issue, the
President is standing upon
what some here see as the
only possible constitutional
ground. He is refusing to raise
the smallest suggestion that it
is his business either to ap
prove or disapprove. It is his
business only to enforce.
These are not merely the
views of those often dismissed
in the prevailing climate as
mere "moderates." These are
also the views of some of the
most devoted of all the advo
cates of all-out civil rights
and of all-out enforcement.
Some are Senators from
New England, which has his
torically not been notably
"soft" upon Southern denial
of Negro rights. Some are
Democrats; some are Republi
cans. But wherever they come
from and whatever their
party they are working rea
sonably, they are the true re
sponsibles. They are not try
ing to "let Faubus get away
with it" and again defy Fed
eral court orders. They are
trying instead to support the
President's power and duty
to maintain order in Litle
Rock if he must. But they are
backing a sensible use of that
power.
way.
" eral
they ask, were Fed
eral troops sent last time
before the Federal Depart
ment of Justice made any ef
fort to use its easily exercis
able right to summon any
number of deputy marshals toj
PTLUO
(By M-T Staff and Contributors)
Which page of the Mail
Tribune do you read?
On Page 1, Friday, Aug.
22, a headline said: "Living
Costs Go To New High."
On Page 8A, same issue, a
headline said: "Cost of Liv
ing Reported Declined."
The . first, of course, re
ported the U.S. Department of
Labor's figures, the other the
National Industrial Confer
ence Board.
The headlines are all right,
but who to believe?
Nothing like youthful
free-enlerprisers, we always
Comment
SHOOT BACK?
A state employee has come
up with what we consider the
most probing question of our
times. It's okay, he says, if
we shoot for the moon. But
what if the moon shoots
back? Oregon Statesman,
Salem.
NO SUCH PLOT EXISTS.
MR. TUGMAN
Southern Oregon news
papers have been romping
with both feet on a recent
Orgonian- proposal that the
Ashland Shakespearean festi-.
val be transferred to Port
land for the 1959 Centennial.
We would not be disposed
to join in the uproar except
for one thing: Some editors,
notably Bill Tugman of the
Port Umpqua Courier, have
been building what was simp
ly a thought dreamed up on
a dull day by one writer into
a Portland community plot to
steal the Ashland festival.
We remind Editor Tugman
that the Oregonian is not
Portland, and we know of no
community ambition to re
move the festival from its
lovely Ashland setting.
The fact is, the Centennial
commission is striving to pro
mote and encourage as many
activities about the state as it
can during the Centennial
year. This is all the more rea
son to keep the Ashland festi
val where it is and where it
belongs.
Far from wanting to "raid
Ashland", thousands of Port
landers are glad to make the
trek to that part of the state
for the purpose of combining
the cultural feast which the
festival offers with the recrea
tional enjoyment available in
the' surrounding area. -
Tugman belittles the sup
port which Portland has giv
en to the festival. Perhaps he
writes out of an ingrown anti
Portland bias. We'll wager
every Ashland audience in
cludes a generous sprinkling
of Portlanders. The festival
is always well publicized in
Portland. Our own drama edi
tor, Arnold Marks, has en
joyed excellent relationships
with the festival organization
for many years.
Above all, it ought to be
impressed on the mind of
every southern Oregon resi
dent, there is no Portland plot
to steal the festival. We like
it where it is. Oregon Jour
nal, Portland. -
CHARY OF DEATH
PENALTY?
A Georgia court has just
sentenced a confessed killer
to life imprisonment. He is
the killer who confessed to
the robbery murder for which
James F. Foster, a house
painter, had previously been
convicted and sentenced to
death. The real killer's con
fession saved Foster's life in
a dramatic story that was told
in the news a few weeks ago.
That Georgia court might no
doubt have sentenced the
real killer to the death pen
alty it had previously pre
scribed for an innocent man,
but evidently had a good les
son regarding the horrible
mistakes that can occur where
capital punishment is legal.
This change of sentence by
a Georgia judge might be
worthy of note by Oregoni
ans who will vote in Novem
ber on a measure to abolish
the death penalty. Astorian
Budget, Astoria.
enforce integration orders?
The President will be under
heavy pressure from these re
sponsibilities, if Little Rock
again erupts in violence, to
make use of this civil alterna
tive before again resorting to
the military one.
If he is wise, it is felt
among some of his well-wishers
inside and outside Con
gress, he will at least make
the attempt this time if the
new legal breathing spell at
length produces final and re
sisted orders for integration
at once.
(Copyright, 1958. by United
Features Syndicate. Inc.)
say, but we were a bit
startled lo learn of a young
couple who had just
brought their first - born
home from the hospital
when a little neighbor girl
was over inquiring about
baby-sitting opportunities.
Bill Bigham, known as
'Uncle Bill" to hundreds of
4-H'ers, was reminiscing the
other day as the 4-H, FFA
fair got under way, of how,
long ago, a posse of county
fair officials chased a Die
through the center of town.
That was in the days when
Xhe fair was put on in tents
m what is now the city park
next to the library.
He also recalls that on
another occasion he helped
chase a wild steer around the
bases in the ball-park adja
cent to the present fair
grounds.
If that had happened this
year, and if the steer had
been a cow, what an adver
tisement that would be for
the Dairy Maids ball team!
Weather comment over
heard Thursday morning:
"Fog? in Aug.?" ,
Back in the barnstorming
days of flying, an eager
young pilot was out to es
tablish a cross-country speed
record in his light plane. As
he was flying along, his mo
tor suddenly quit, and the
plane spiralled gently down
and came to rest on top of a
large apple tree. The farmer
came rushing out as the pilot
climbed down with a dis
gusted lok on his face.
"Hurt?" the farmer asked.
"Nope," said the pilot.
"Then why're you looking
so disgusted?" asked the
farmer.
"I had a chance to set a
new record and look what
happened," the pilot replied.
"Well," said the farmer,
"the way I look at it, you just
did set a new record. First
time I ever heard of anyone
climbing down out of an
apple tree without climbing
up into it first."
The committee studying
state taxes, when it met
here, heard a tax collector
explain how people- with
taxes amounting to $5 or so
insist on paying them in
Installments. - One of the
legislators, with a bemused
look on his face, was heard
to mutter. "I'm surprised
to learn that ANYONE has
a tax bill of less than $10."
Another -tax committee
story, gleaned from an up
state paper, is to the effect
that when members visited
this area they drove over to
Ashland and saw "The Mer
chant of Venice" the one
where Shylock insists on his
pound of flesh.
AH" of which, we are told,
started bystanders wondering
if the tax boys were there to
pick up a couple, of new ideas
about collections.
Members of the county
welfare department occas
ionally receive gifts of old
clothes, which they pass
along to some ' of their
needy clients. One of the
workers in that office went
on vacation recently, and.
forgetfully, left his or her
coat hanging in the hall.
Another employee saw i
thought it was a donation,
and cheerfully gave it
away, we. are told on good
authority.
A merchant we know, who
caters to feminine customers,
and who has a wealth of ex
perience, has spelled out eight
reasons why women buy
things. (There are others, he
is sure, but he has these fig
ured out.)
Here they are:
Because her husband says
she can't have it.
Because it will make her
look thin.
Because herfieighbors can t
afford one.
Because she can't afford
one.
Because
Paris.
' Because
it comes from
everybody's got
one.
Because no one's got one,
Because.
-What makes him think a
woman needs ANY reason,
is what we want to know.
A man who recently re
turned from a visit to the
World's Fair in Belgium told
a friend of ours who told us
that the American exhibit
there is far the most popu
lar, and for junt one reason:
The toilets are free.
Our friend says, "I don't
know that we'll win a war
with such tactics, but it
seems, from his comments,
we are winning a lot of
friends."
Plumbing may solve the
problem of co-existence yet.
t
. -