The Family Council
Editor's note: The Family Council consists of a Judge, a psychiatrist,
three clergymen, a newspaper editor a women's editor and two writers. Each
article ts a summary of an actual report The Family Council does not give
advice; It merely reports on problems that have teen dealt with by
responsible agencies and counselors.
Mr. H. M. Howard has turn
ed against his father.
Howard M. He has no respect
for my mother.
Mr. H. M. She brought him
up to despise me.
Mri. H. M. I am having a
great deal of trouble with my
husband and our 16-year-old son,
Howard.
Our marriage was not a happy
one and we drifted far apart.
My husband has always been
very critical of me and nasty in
his manner. I never realized that
Howard took all this in and was
hurt for me, but now he has
turned against his father in the
most awful way. There are con
stant fights and the two of them
have even come to blows.
I point out to Howard that
his father has always been a
good provider and if I left him,
I know I would have to find
hirnQto get support from him.
He is so vindictive. All I ask
is tHat Howard hold his tongue
in front of his father so we can
Olive in peace.
Howard M. Why should I
hold my tongue in front of my
father when he doesn't hold his
in front of my mother? He has
no respect for her at all and
treats her like dirt.
My mother says he is a good
provider, but he is really very
stingy with money. I know that
he makes much more than he
says he does. If my mother left
him I wouldn't let her take his
filthy money. It would take long
for me to be able to" support her
as well as he does.
S
Mr. H. M. My wife had
brought Howard up to despise
me and now she blames me fo?
making a problem out of him
She let me know from the start
of our marriage that she was
only staying with me for the
sake of support. Now she sudden
ly wants peace too!
Th Council: Two facts emerge
clearly from this ugly tangle-
first, it took two persons to cre
ate this misery, and second, that
Howard is the innocent and most
abused victim of it. Mr. and Mrs.
H. M. must derive some perverse
pleasure out of torturing them
selves and one another. This
pleasure is denied Howard.
It would probably be impos
sible to find out who struck the
first blow in this marriage Mr.
H. M. when he was "nasty" to
hi wife or Mrs. H. M when she
let her husband know that she
had no. love for him.
They ought to know, however,
they are both guilty of having
brought up this boy on the poi
son of their contempt for one
another. He now shows only his
bitterness toward his father, but
it is doubtful whether, in the
long run, he will have much
love for the mother who stayed
with her husband "to get sup
port from him."
How much damage can be un
done here? That depends on how
much courage and determina
tion the H. M.'s can muster to
help their son. They would need
some outside help, probably
from a social worker who could
work with them as a family.
They must recognize, however,
that they cannot help their son
without changing themselves.
They should also recognize
there iOnore at stake here than
getting some peace and quiet in
the home. Howard must acquire
some love and respect for both
his parents if he is to have a
chan for a reasonably normal
and happy adulthood.
(Copyright 1957.
General Features Corp.)
was happy when her mother
came to visit, but always said
she wanted to stay with me and
Johnny.
I feel very sorry for my daugh
er when she sees that her own
child isn't happy with her after
she has looked forward all these
years to making a home. But is
it right to force the child?
The Council: It may be very
difficult for Arlene to face the
fact that the home she has
dreamed about is a strange,
frightening and forbidding place
to her little girl. Lots of love and
attention would probably help
to make Dolores more comfort
able eventually, but it seems
cruel to put this child through
emotional torment if it is not
absolutely necessary.
Dolores has a good home with
her grandmother and it is
rather unfair to take her out of
it in order to give her mother
more pleasure. The change in
living quarters may seem a small
one to adults and the change
from a grandmother's home to a
mother's home may, on the sur
face, appear to be a Dositive
good but. it doesn't work that
way for children.
Dolores is being torn ud bv
her emotional roots. The words
mother and grandmother have
little meaning for her. She only
knows where she wants to be.
For the sake of her future
relationship with her child, Ar
lene should try to accept the fact
that for the time being her little
girl is better off with her grand
mother. She should try to make
Dolores as happy and comfort
able as possible when she visits
with her, but should Dut no Dres-
sure on her to change her situa
tion. It is possible that when Do
lores nears teen age she will
feel less dependent upon her
grandmother and . her , young
uncle, and will be grateful for
a young mother and want to live
with her. Even if this does not
come to pass, however, Arlene
can have a fine relationship
with her daughter if she puts
the child's happiness first and
doesn't make undue demands on
her.
(Copyright 1957,
General Features Corp.)
Grange
Quotes From the News
By UNITED PRESS
Huntsville, Ala. Dr. Werner Von Braun, after saying he could
not have been at fault, as charged by Democratic National Chair
man Paul M. Butler, for missiles lag in the Truman administra
tion because he was not then even a U.S. citizen:
"It was never my intention to assess the blame upon anyone
for the so-called 'lost years.' My personal conviction is that the
United States could not have undertaken major military projects
involving large expenditures in that period. The war was over
and the people wanted homes, autos and other things, not long
range rockets."
Washington The Defense .department in an announcement
indicating the U.S. still expects to launch its full-sized earth satel
lite in March:
"The repairs (to the Cape Canaveral launching site) are not i
expected to jeopardize the launching of an earth satellite accord
ing to previously announced plans."
St. Louis President Assistant Sherman Adams, urging a con
stitutional provision to allow the vice president to take over presi
dential duties without delay in event of the president's disability:
"In these times it takes no imagination at all to think of a situ
ation where delay of a presidential decision due to incapacity
for a day, or even for a few hours, could have grave conse
quences." Atlantic City James G. Cross, president of the Bakery Work
ers union, whose refusal to step down from office led to an AFL
CIO expulsion vote against his union:
"I am not corrupt or unfit. I'm the whipping boy the scape
goat." New York Adlai E. Stevenson, twice Democratic candidate
for president, on some effects of the Russian Sputnik:
"Russia stands today in the eyes of the majority of the mem
bers of the world's population as more skillful, more powerful,
yes, and ironically, more peaceful, than we are."
Tuesday, December 10, 1957
MEDFORD (OREGON) MAIL TRIBUNE THREE
Several Speaking 'Flubs'
Noted in Studio One Show
Griffin Creek Grange
Griffin Creek Grange will
meet in regular session Thurs
day, Dec. 12.
Plans will be made for the
Christmas party to be held Sat
urday, Dec. 21.
Mrs. Clyde Sturgill, lecturer,
is planning a program for the
Grange meeting.
O Arlene S. My daughter is un
happy living with me.
Mrs. T. W. Is it right to
force the child?
Arlene S. Six years ago
when I was 17, 1 got into a heap
of trouble and had an illegiti
mate baby. I didn't want to give
the baby up and my mother was
willing to take care of the child
with her own little boy who was
only a year older.
I went to live and work in an
other city. A year ago I married
a wonderful man who wants to
take care of me and my child.
This is what I had always dream
ed of. We took my daughter with
us, but it turns out that no mat
ter what we do for her, she is
unhappy and says she wants to
live with Grandma.
I love my child and want to
have her with me and my hus
band has been -so kind to her,
giving her treats and all kinds of
attention. I think I shouldn't let
her visit my mother so she'll get
used to being with us, but my
mother is against this plan.
Mrs. T. W. We all want to
make Dolores happy. That is the
main consideration, but I can't
see how it is right to prevent her
from visiting the home she has
known all her life. She thinks of
my little boy as a brother and is
lonesome without him. She cries
all the time when she comes
here and begs me not to send
her back to her motSer.
I have tried to do right by
this child and have always told
her that her mother loves her
and that someday she would go
to live with her. This always
seemed to frighen Dolores. She
Gold Hill Grange
Plans for the annual Christ
mas party were discussed at the
regular meeting of Gold Hill
Grange Thursday, Dec. 5.
This party will be held in
the Grange hall Thursday, Dec.
19. There will be the usual
Christmas tree, with gift ex
change and program. The juve
niles will participate as usual in
this affair, providing their share
of the program.
There will be a rehearsal of
the Grange chorus on Tuesday
evening, Dec. 17 when a group
of Grangers also will meet to
trim the tree.
Following the business meet
ing, the lecturers program, fea
turing the annual religious serv
ice was held.. A reading of the
91st psalm was given by chap
lain Nora Wait and hymns sung
by the members. This was fol
lowed by a short game in a
rather lighter view.
Mrs. Wait reported that Agnes
Gray is home from the hospital
and that Glenn Chase is very
much improved after his recent
operation. Mrs. Wait also an
nounced the death of a former
member, Frank Lockewood.
By WILLIAM EWALD
United Press Correspondent
New York (IP) "Studio One"
will move to the West coast in
January in a bid to juice its rat
ings by pursuing a star policy.
Monday night, "Studio One,"
in one of its farewell efforts out
of Manhattan, presented the
first section of a two-part Ar
thur Hailey hospital drama, "No
Deadly Medicine." It was an
adult eastern.
Bailey's drama deals with an
ancient theme the clash be
tween old and new. Specifically,
it traces the conflict between an
elderly pathologist (played by
Lee Cobb) and his new young
assistant (William Shatner).
Woman's Role Lauded
Cobb, one of our more intelli
gent actors, settled down into a
scintillating performance, only
slightly marred by an opening
scene that saw him crank and
crochet around like Lionel Bar-
rymore playing Dr. Gillespie.
Particularly fine, I thought, was
the acting of Betty Sinclair who
essayed the role of a woman
doctor. Shatner's performance
was properly cold, but im
paired a bit by some of those
annoying mannerisims that so
many young actors seem to af
fect nowadays.
There were, it might be men
tioned, several irritating flubs
during the hour: Cobb said:
"Lucy Grainger is having a
baby" when he meant to say
"Elizabeth Alexander is having j
a baby." Shatner referring to a
town called "New Richport,"
said "New Haven," by mistake.
And I'm sure that once, some
one referred to a character
named "Dr. David Coleman" as
"Dr. David Graham."
Well, that can all be changed
when they move the show to
Hollywood. They can just put
it on film to be sure.
The channel swim:
Part of the reason for Arthur
Godfrey's success certainly must
be chalked up to his by-play
with the ladies that drop into
his shows. Monday night on
"Talent Scouts," Godfrey flirt
ed with his first pretty talent
scout and twitched his face soul
fully when he sniffed his second
lady scout's perfume.
Casualties: Red Skelton won't
be able to make his CBS-TV
show tonight he tore a liga
ment in his ankle. ,A filmed
Skelton show will be run off.
REDS CHARGE ALLIES
Berlin (IP) The East German
Communist government charged
today that the western allies
have forfeited their right to be
in Berlin. In the official 1957
yearbook of the German Demo
t.atic Republic, the Reds said
the United States, Britain and
France have violated Berlin's
four-power status by converting
West Berlin into a spy center
for counter-revolution against
the Soviet Zone. By doing this,
they have deprived themselves
of the right to stay in the divided
city, the Reds said.
to give and enjoy
CHOCOLATES
1 lb. box. $1.35
2 lb. box :.2.60
3 lb. box 3.85
5 lb. box 6.35
CENTRAL
DRUG
Your Charge Plate Store
MAIN and CENTRAL
The Juvenile Grange will meet
on Thursday, Dec. 12 when the
Juveniles will put on a short
Christmas program. The Juve
nile Grange committee has
planned a Christmas treat for the
boys and girls at this meeting.
All members are urged to attend.
RAID KILLS 23 AFRICANS
Nairobi, Kenya (IP) Raiding
Merille tribesmen killed 23
peaceful herdsmen last week in
a sudden outbreak of tribal war
fare on Kenya's plains, it has
been disclosed. Official sources
said the Marilles swooped across
the tribal boundary, shot their
way into a segment of Turkana
territory with outmoded Austri
an and Italian rifles, attacked
three villages and killed 23 men
before withdrawing. It was the
third such attack in four weeks,
they said.
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Look at the wonderful selection of shirts now in
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Wilshire fine wale corduroy shirts 3.98
Luxurious silk and cotton sport shirt 6.98
Mailison's rich gabasheen shirts 4.98
Levi's washable wools from 10.95
Arrow sport shirts in sleeve lengths 5.95
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MEDFORD