.PAGE FOUR
MTCPFORD MATL TRTBUyrEt MEDFORD, OREGON. MONDAY, DECEMBER 3, 1923
Medford Mail Tribune
AN IWDEPUNDKNT NEWSPAPER
PUBLISHED EVERT AFTERNOON
EXCEPT SUNDAY, I1T Till
14KDKORU PRINTING CO.
The Medford Bunday Morning Bun la
furnished subscribers teelrlns a savsn
day dally newspaper.
Office Mell Tribune Bullelu. II-1T-SI
Nortb Fir street. Phone 71.
' A consolidation of the Demoorstlo
Times, the Medford Mall, the Medford
Tribune, the Southern Oragonlan. Tbs
Ashland Tribune.
ROBERT W. RBHU Bdltor.
8. 8UMPTER SMITH, Msnaser.
T MAIL In Advance:
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Dally, without Sunday Sun, year. .61
Dallv. without Sunday Sun. montb .IS
Weekly Mall Tribune, one year 1.00
Sunday Sun, one year - 1.00
8T CARRIER In Medford, Ashland.
Jacksonville. Central Point. Phoenix.
Talent and on Highways:
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AU terms oy carrier, uu iu
M'.n.atrArf Hntnr 0ma. niAtler
Medford, Oregon, under act of March (,
I87S.
Official paper of the City of Medford
uiiicim v. .j . . ..
Th. nn lu MiMr tMi.Mi toiiaane. Ore
sjio jsaeramemo, tiu., a uii"w "
over 600 miles, having leased wire Aaso-
UEHBMHM
A BHOCTAT JDD
uir TKft
PHKHn.
Vka AsrwrlaAu1 Pr-i.aa IaV ttXOlUllTAlV
titled to the uh for republication of
&U news dispatches credited to It or not
AtriAi-wlns credited In this paper, and
also to the local news published herein.
All rights of republication of mmo)
moatcnf nertin ar iwn rfTv
Ye Smudge Pot
By Arthur Horry
O, Where Arc the Wandering
D'Autromont Hoy, Today?
$16 is the average pr capita yearly
expenditure by tho women folks for
cosmetics, and sumo 8 in oar it ull on
the very first day.
SIMPLE STATKMBNT8 XTItGKD
FROM SENATORIAL CANDIDATES
(Hdline Portland Telegram). It
won't take a Kit of nagging.
P. Henry Gadd, who spent last
' summer and fall In a motor vehicle,
reports that a tour of tho Middle West
Is a poor subHtlttito for an overcoat,
' His youngest boy In wearing two pairs
of pants theso days. ,
ASK THE COYOTE
( . Oregon i'lty Enterprise)
V BLACK CHICLY dog. bob tall,
brown feet, last seen on Chas.
. Htone's place after coyote. Will
pay $10 for any Information that
t ; will lead to recovery of tho dog.
Chot Gunl, Ueuvercreek. Phono
; ,13-61. - .,
From Eugene and Portland papers,
T It Is gleaned that tho University of
Oregon football team "won a moral
victory" Saturday, but tho University
of Washington football team got the
most touchdowns. .
fvWho remembers tho days of purifi
cation, when a cltl7.cn who opposed
the Ku Klux Klan, was uiikcd firmly
and devoutly, with a steady gawk at
the top vest button: What havo you
been doing wrong to make your con
science hurt?
. A LADY TALKS
I tend strictly to my own business
385 days In the year. 1 live my own
life, and the other follow Is his own
driver. Now last Wednesday, on my
Bunday off, I washed. I novor stuck
my phiz out of my room tho whole
day. Hut it seems 1 did nothing of
tho kind, H is whispered. I was lit
Up, and did not conduct myself as a
gentleman. It could have happened,
but it didn't. Ilesldes, no flat-chested
' Boprunnio Is going to toll false things,
and got away with it. Ho In 1 waltzes
to the sitting room, and I says:
Madam, whut do you mean by telling
my friends 1 was drunk on my Sunday
off lust Wednesday? Is that anyway
for a lady to act? When I call you
a lady I'm a bigger liar than you are.
And I said, Wipe that look of holiness
off your map before I knock it off.
And don't you ask me if Pin Justlug
Bhe got pale n round tho gills, and
fixed. her back hair, and sniffles twice,
and said; I never said any such a
thing. I'm tired of life. I feel llko
dying. You aro so cruel. And I said.
If you are so keen for tho graveyard,
why don't you do something. Nobody
Is holding you, and you hain't tied
down In that rocker. Tho drug stores
' are all open, and carbolic acid -Is
i cheap. And out I go, madder than a
wet hornet. I guess she thliks l'm a
wild hairpin. I've been a goatee long
enough, and, slinging hash or civil
ized, I tend to my own business 38G
days in tho year. Good night.
DO THOU LIKI.WISK
(Salem Capital Journal)
DEAR ANNUO LAUIU1C:
Our hearts are troubled. All
the young men seemed to like us
until two new girls moved here.
Since their arrival tho young men
have been rushing them nnd will
havo nothing to do with us. Whut
Is the matter?
' "The girls don't look any better
than we do, but will kiss them
good-night. Is that the reason
they like them? Please adviHO us
what to do. FOUll CHUMS.
The officers discovered a one-Inch
hole In tho floor. Detective- Vinci,
boing of sufficiently small staturo,
; crawled through. No other entranco
existed. (Omaha lice, via lt.K.U)
'They greased him first.
" The low temperature this morning
'extracted the southern drawl from
f Bid Brown's feet.
Forsons should not Joke with news
paper men;, that Is, give them fake
news. When n young lady tells a
GaRCtto man In tho presence of a
third party that she is engaged, and
Insists that It is the truth, she should
not criticise the Oaaette if the fact la
printed. Today Miss draco M. Whea
ton denies that she Is engaged, but
nevertheless she alone is responsible
for the announcement.- (Weymouth,
Mass., . Gazette). Grace meets up
with a bUEi saw.
THE LEAGUE AND THE MONROE DOCTRINE.
i
T IS INTER KSTIXO to note how variously tlie Monroe Doctriue
Criiti'iiiii'v whs ci'Miriiled ivccntly.
Secretary of State Hughes cclehratcil the event by justifying his
policy of detached activity toward Europe, while the Portland Jour
nal celebrated the same event yesterday by calling ju the Monroe Doc
trine to support the League of Nations. .
AVe' admire the Portland Joiinal for its consisteut persistency re
garding the Wilson covenant, but in this particular instance, we fear
Secretary Hughes has the better of the argument.
If one will review the history of the Monroe Doctrine it will be
found that it was in reality nothing new and startling, at the time
of its promulgation but was merely a continuation of the policy
of Washington to steer clear of European entanglements.
Jefferson really launched the Monroe Doctrine in American poli
ties when he said :
"Our first nnd fundamental maxim should bo never to entanslo
oursolves in tho broils of Europe; our second never to suffer Eu
ropo to inter-mcddle with CU-Atlantic affairs."
President Monroe and Secretary of State Adams merely carried
this reasoning to its logical conclusions when they told the Holy Al
liance to keep out of South America, and told Russia to keep out of
the Nortli American continent.
"You keep out of our back yard mid we will keep out of yours."
That, in simple parlance, was the meaning of the Monroe doctrine
then, and is its meaning, with slight modifications, today.
Obviously the League of Nations would -be. in direct opposition to
Personal Health Service
By W 1LLIAM BRADY, M. D.
Notmd Physician and Author
Signed letters pertaining to personal health and hygiene, not to di
sease diagnosis or treatment, v-i be answered by Dr. Brady If a stamped,
self addressed envelope la enclosed. Letters should be brief and written In
Ink. Owing to the large number of letters received, only a few can be an
swered here. No reply can be made to queries not conforming to Instruc
tions. Address Dr. William Brady In cars of this newspaper. .
Going Stale
Football Is a pernicious game for Isn't physically disabled, not just the
high school boys. It Is a man's game
even for men who have fairly attained
their growth and development It Is a
very strenuous game
for which the play
er must be trained
with nice scientific
care lest he suffer
serious or perma
nent physical dam
age. To permit lads
in their 'teens to at
tempt to play foot
ball, to pretend to
"train" them in
handful of boys who play football.
Football has never shown Itself a
very valuable game so far as the phy
sical development of the player is con
cerned. Indeed, the premature shock
ing fatality which overtakes now this,
now that great football star a few
years ago makes one wonder whether
the game is worth the candle, even
for college men. Probably overstrain
of the heart has something to do with
the untimely deaths of former athletes.
Ordinary acute dilation of the heart
which occurs when an athlete loses
season counted by his wind and collapses at the finieh
days rather t h a n 1 or near the finish of a supreme effort,
weeks and months clears up completely in a few hours
Is an abuse of athletics which no one or a day or two, but sometimes the
interested in physical education strain is so severe that complete re-
should countenance. covery never does take place; the vie-
There Is a condition or state which tim lives . the remainder of his life
suoli a policy, for it would be based upon the assumption that Europe thlct(t ca taicness. brought about with a handicapped heart which is
1 ' 1 1 1 by over exertion, by exorcise of any not a good heart to withstand the
would have a right to take an active part in our affairs and we would kind carried to excess before the Indl- overload of such an emergency as
i 1 . - , , . . 4ll. . . - vmuai nas oeen sufficiently, trained pneumonia, xor instance.
have a right, in fact a duty, to take an active part in the affairs of for endurance. staionoss is a mani-1
Europe, . . ' -.r Testation of constitutional exhaustion,
i . ' .1 whlph nvnrnnana i r un 1 f In hma ttt loan.
The Portland Journal avoids such a conclusion by advocating a ness on exertion, as a first stage of
Monroe Doctrine of the World.
QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
Calluses
I have a very tender and trouble-
Hut when the Monroe Doctrine tho condition of atalenese'. 'From this some callus under the ball of the right
ceases to be exclusively American, it ceases, of course, to be the Mon- gent training is vouchsafed the ath- less I place pasteboard strips under
j iuio, rest Dnngs iainy prompt ana me neei. ' tan you suggest anytning
sure recovery. . , to relieve this?' (OA. C.) '
The second degree or stage of stale- Answer. It is often a result of flat
ness is marked by, a strange fatigue lening of the transverse arch, - the
lassiture which ' affects -the whole callus forming from pressure and fric
roe Doctrine.
QUILL POINTS
muscular system; with a longer rest, tion at the point on the Bole whera
recovery is usually a- matter of a there should normally be a crease
week or two. The third statze of stale- leiurthwlne. A tmltahlA nhlnncr nnd of
The worsj, has happened. ' A Scot who is accustomed to bagpipes ness drifts into a chronic condition boilermaker's felt or of soft leather
i i ? 1 ' from which recovery is problematic; or of many layers of adhesive piaster
lias toiHlunmu ja5.. jtne vjctim Io80s interest In his game, 'superimposed, about thefshape and
, exercise and every thing else; his size of the callus, worn under the sole
. ., ... , , , . , ." muscles lose their elasticity and be- fixed in the shoe, often gives relief.
After nil, the Village and the metropolis agl-CO concerning almost come flabby; he appears pale; his The callus Itself may be softened and
all fundamentals except bedtime. oyea aro dul1 and IialPS8i he shuns removed by the dally use of the fa-
1 I tho slightest effort, ills blood pres-" miliar corn cure a solution of 30
. , 'sure and temperature aro below nor- grains of salicylic acid in half an
KvorbiKtinir nemw will- heirin kooii nftPr'nntimiH lojirn to nr-iv for nm,: nlB Hleen does not refresh hlm: ounce of flexible collodion. This may
J.vuiahting peace will Dtgin soon anci nations learn to pray lor his a))etite l8 CUpriciOU8, his temper be painted on the callus once a day
humility instead of victory. . . peevish, he is unable to concentrate for a week or more.
on his work or study; he loses weight. I . Coso Presents Features
' 'This Is a sad but frequent result of' Kindly let me know what to do for
It is estimated that a vocabulary of 800 words is sufficient for all tne crudc unscientific attempt to a run-down condition. Are raw eggs
i train growing boys for such severe good to take every day? Is salt water
. i endurance tests as football games, good to drink on rising? What is best
The -stale ness may not be so marked for head catarrh? (F. J. E.)
nor so readily recognized as the typ- Answer. We can only assure you
There's small choice. In town you smell the exhaust of motors, i:al picture would suggest, but it hap- that raw eggs are perfectly good to
.... . t , i pens so often thaU 1 want to put It eat every day If one doesn't like them
and 111 tile country It 8 a poltcat. .strongly hero, in order to worry cooked, that a little salt In the water
' parents who permit growing boys to Is not of great consequence tho cer-
, . u .. . . , , , . -i . Ko In for thlb Imitation of college tainly it isn't what we should call
It lsn t equality the downtrodden long for, but the privilege of sport. . v good, and that there la no such ron-
A much more' desirablo kind of dltion as head catarrh. k
phyical training, a .much more useful ' Speaker's Jloarscnc&ft
thing for the boy to learn, and a! Can you auggest -anything, to pre
manlier game or sport than football vent tho voice from going hoarse
ever can bo, Is boxing. Boxing might when one attempts public speaking?
woll supplant fool hall, in the high (R. M.) Ti ' I : V
school curriculum.,, It would be a fine. Answer: Before speaking . garble
thing if every boy were required to the throat with: - - ' '
tuko a regular courso In boxing from Powdered alum 2 drams
a competent Instructor, as part of his Barley water 6 ounces
high school training every boy who Honey of rose 2 ounces
purposes except a blowout.
snubbing those who now snub them.
A deliberately unfriendly act, from the French viewpoint, is any
uggestiou that she 'bo reasonable. f ir
A BlfifiER AND BETTER MEDFORD
Facts and Figures Taken From the Official Records to Show That
Medford and the Rogue River Valley Are in Better Industrial and
' Financial Condition Than Ever Before in Their History.
(INSTALLMENT NO. 3)
S i
O M
9QP00
40000f
itOUir s-n
io n o
g g r g C
NATIONAL. KftRK ALlL
2o.ooo f
lOpOO ; --'L .
m ct Q r".
g y
o
Tourist Travel.
Here is a chart that lias only started. At tho present .nte . its
curve will be higher than the Wool worth Tower iu a few years.. And
probably ".'mo.. crop is going to bring more money, outsido' money,
into Medford and Southern Oregon than this tourist crop, not only: the
tourist travel' to Crater Lake but to other points in Southern Oregon
and along the Pacific Highway. In the boom busting days, the good
eld days, the Crater Lake tourist crop totalled 4500; this y'car' it '
reached' a total of .r2,017, an increase of about 1200 per-cent. And
tourist travel to this great scenic wonder has only started., " '
, Aside1 from the advertising value of this tourist travel it esti
mated ,tliat the 'tourist crop of 1923 alone was worth approximately
half a million dollars to Medford nnd the Rogue River valley.
'. 1923 Automobile Camp Ground Report, i
Here is the record of the present year iu Medford 's auto eamps:
: 'I '. ','"', '"'.:'. " v. No. Of. . , ..
' Cars: -Tourista
' Municipal camp -. 3,877 12,838
; " Privately owned camp ,.......'.'...... 7,111.. , 24,896.
Total ! : ...'. : .10,988 37,734
Families Staying at Camp More. Than 30. Days.' ''
Municipal 'camp
Privately owned camp
Total .:
f;
.1
n
,:..:.:.:.12
.a.s.r,.Hj,.:;
...,.;:i..28 ,
1 1
The old-timer who was proud of his broad acres now has a son
who is just as proud of his broad "a."
The diploma you get from the University of Hard Knocks is hand
ed out through the paying teller's window.
Only a deaf man, however, is privileged to devote his entire at
tention to the funny unties of an orator.
Revolutionists in Germany have a hard time. Every time they
start something, the police arrest all three of them.
Correct this sentence: "Take her, son," said the doting father
"you arc poor, but a little hardship will do her good."
Now is the time for every good wife to select the set of china she
will give her husband for Christmas.
Coffin linings cost more now. As a matter of economy, one should
pay more attention to the brake linings.
Correct this sentence: "Come over some afternoon," remarked
the flapper to her friend "and bring your .sewing."-
An honest man is one who reads the titles of some great man's
six favorite books and confesses that he never heard of the darned
things.
RipplingRhumcs
THE SMILING NUISANCE.
3
"JUST TOWN TALK"
Capled Right By Mike
GEORGE M. Cohen ,
CAN PICK up ;
A WORTHLESS piece
s
OF ULANK paper
WRITE A song on It
.
AND MAKE It worth
SIXTY THOUSAND dollars
THAT'S genius;.
I -
JOHN D. Rockofelle'r
. .
CAN WRITE a few wordB
s .
ON A shoot of paper
a ?
AND MAKE It worth , t
MILLIONS OP dollars
THAT'S capital :
DAMK JIMl'SON is a good old soul; I drink her health, I
quaff a bowl of water from the babbling rill j I boost Dame
Jimpson with a will. She's full of peace, good will to men; she
would not harm a worm or wren. She comes and says, with beam
ing smile, "I'd like to use your phone a while." Not once a
week or month, I say, but ten or fifteen times a day. And friends
of hers will call me up, when I sit down to dine or sup, and whis
per in a honeyed tone, "Please call Dame Jimpson to the phone."
Dame Jimpson lives across the street, and there I go on weary
feet to tell her that some locoed jay would talk her arm off right
away. I always mutter when I start, "This phoning business
breaks my heart j I'll have to tell this nervy dame it is no way to
play the game." Hut when she sheds her beaming smile, so glad
and bright and free from guile, a smile that has a wide renown,
I cannot bear to call her down. Dame Jimpson 's living every
where; she is her neighbor's despair. Some day perhaps she'll
realize that it is neither safe nor wise to sponge on folks who
have a phone, nnd she will get one of her own.
THE UNITED States
. .
CAN TAKE an ounce
-
AND A quarter of gold
s
STAMP UPON It
s
THE AMERICAN Eaglo
AND MAKE It worth
TWENTY DOLLARS
a
THAT'S money
A MECHANIC can take
.
MATERIALS WORTH $5.00
AND MOLD It
INTO WATCH springs
WORTH A thousand dollars
a
THAT'S skill
A POLICEMAN
ASTHMA
Jk No car foi
r relief Is ofti
v Va po Rub
No cars for it, bat weleoms
relief Is often brought by
Owr IT MMtc Jar fi.J ar(y
.CAN TAKE your number
'
AND PUT it on
A PIECE of paper
AND MAKE you out
ABOUT TEN bucks
THAT'S hard luck
BUT WHEN a man
GOES TO rent a flat
AND THE landlord asks
"HAVE YOU any children!"
AND YOU put on
A MELANCHOLY look
'.
AND ANSWER "Yes"'
"HUT THEY are over .
"IN THE cemetery' '
j
AND THEN paya the man
SIX MONTHS rent
IN ADVANCE
AND GETS a receipt
AND THEN goes over
TO THE cemetery
- i
AND BRINGS
, .'
HIS CHILDREN back
THAT'S wisdom '
ISN'T IT?
I THANK yon.
For Wet Wash
Dry Wash Rough Dry
Phone 873
Wat Wash, pound So
Dry Wash, pound7c
Rough Dry, pound . &c
American Laundry
Families .Taking Up Pormanent Residence in Jackson Co. ,
Mhtik'IpHldnmp J .' !........30
l-'rivalcly owned camp,.., .-. i.. .................17
'.' .
' '.' ' 4
Total
: Thirty-seven thousand, seven hundred and'thirty-four tourists in '
Medford means hundreds of thousands of dollars spent in Medford.
The tourist .crop in the "good old days" was an unknown factor, for
strictly speaking, there was none. Today it is one of our best paying ,
crops and is steadily increasing.. . . ' - i'..
wife stares aghast at the ruins about
her. It is nearly always there are
two strong .willing arms extended to
her and she finds a haven in that
rcfufro which, in her vanity and will- .
ful pride, she has scorned. . The
Amalgamated Association, of Restless
Wives couldn't possibly manage to
keep the sad farce 'moving were it
not for the Benevolent and Protective
Order of Faithful Husbands!
(Copyright John F. DUle)
KoVEiP
23
msaasMMM
THE GREATEST THING IN THE
WORLD
by Laurel Grav
Restless Wlvee Again.
Am I writing too often about 'em?
I mean the restless wives to whom I
have lately paid ..iiy roepecta In what
, t , I .hopo w:ie un
mistakable sent!
nients. I'm euro
1 don't want to
fee mistaken in
this; I am very
cross about the
restless wife. In
the first place,
she Is so foolish
and so blind. The
wife who poes
out on the high
ways looking for
a good time be-
t r : 1 - cause her home
has grown dull and stupid never does
find that good time. Nope, she doesn't
even deceive herself. Then, again, the
restless wife is so vain and so gul
lible. How easily she falls for flat
tery provided it Is banal enough.
How quickly she yields to the sugges
tion that she is "wonderful" and a
"durUng" and all that sort of tosh. It
seems to me that nothing is so pa
thetic as the. young wife who . races
out intq the arena, where the lions
await to devour her, proclaiming that
she is misunderstood by the man ahe
has'married. Alas, tho trouble is that
she Is too frequently understood and
that is just what ails her; she doesn't
relish it. . I must say this for tho
husbands of theaVrtfstlesa wives; they
are almost , always generously under-.
standing' and TVhien the restlessness
has subsided and a weary, tear-stain-j
ed. battered. wretched, miserable I
Ever so aftcn th' newspape
die; around an' run across th'
latest plot aro o' Wilson an' print
it. 'other folks smoke an' drink
an' cut up nn' have a good lime,
hut we don't Beem t have any
social rcTOgnltion at nil." ennf
plalnrd Mrs. Uifo Bod. t'day.
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