! PAGfl FOUR
lEtDFORD frfATL TRIBUNE, ftrEDFORD, OftEflON, TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 6, 1923
Medford Mail Tribune
AN INDEPENDENT NffWSPAPKR
PUBLISHED EVERT AFTEKNOON
EXCEPT SUNDAY, BY THK
! MiSlJi'OHD PK1NTINQ CO.
Th Meiferd Sunday Uornfni Bun la
I furnished subscribers seslrlns ft &
Jay daily newspaper.
OfflM Mall Tribune Bulldlos. 11-17-1
North Kir street. Phone 76
A consolidation at the Democratlo
Tlmea, the Medford Mall, the Medford
Tribune, the Southern Oregonlao. The
aJhland Tribune.
: RORBHT W. RUTTU Kdllor.
B. BUMPTER SMITH, Majer,
Y MAIL In Advance:
Dally with Sunday Sun. year 17.50
. Dally wltn Sunday Bun, month .76
; uslljr. wltnnut Sunday Bun, year, f.50
Dally, without Sunday Bun, month .
eokl Mall Tribune, one year 1.00.
lunday Sun, one year - '
BY CARI1IEI In Medford. Aahlend,
Jacksonville. Central Point. PhoenU,
Talent and on Highways:
Dally, with sundry Uuo, month .70
Dally, without Sunday Bun. month
Dally, without Sunday Sun. year- 7.60
Dally, with Sunday Sun, one year 8.50
All terms by carrier, caeh In advance.
Entered as aectjnc. own matter at
Bedford. Oregon, under act of Maron 8,
. l7.
Official paper of the City of Medford.
Official paper of Jackeon County.
The only paper bet-ei tougene. Ore.,
ind Secramonto, Cullf., a dletance of
vr 600 miles, having leased wire Aeso
slated Press Service.
Sworn aanv a-rrreai circulation for
III montln eti.llng October I, l'-!8. 8379.
liore than double tne circulation of any
' ither paper published or circulated 10
faokaon County. -
UBUBBIU . OF TUB kSBOCIATED
PRESS
The Associated Preaa la exclusively
mtltled 'o the uae for republication or
!1 news dlapntchea credited to It ov not
rtherwlae oredlted In this pajer, and
tleo to the local news publlahed herein.
All rtRhte of republication of special
. ,inntrhn bwrcln Bre alio rewffrven
Ye Smudge Pot
By Arthur Perry.
''Thoro hns been a falling; off In the
desire to be splattered south to the
watortnnk, owing to tho chango in
the weather.
Tho gentlemen In chargo of tho
drive for campaign funds for poverty
stricken Honry Ford, have voted not
to accept any donations of a certain
vehlclo, supposed to run, when pro
perly approached.
( A horse showed up on tho Main
Stem today, that 20 years ago was
stuck In the mud In tho biz. dlst. from
November till Into In May.
' Tho F. Hart mustache can now be
recognized as such, by a commlttoo of
exports. '
. Ql'IT I'lTGIMRM
(Marysvlllo Appeal
Doar Miss tlroy:
I am a girl of 24, and have
been keeping company with a
young man, who my parents
think well of. A few evenings
ago, whilo returning from - the
movies, ho attomptcd to kiss mo.
I slapped him harder than I- in
tended to! and since then.'wlfllo
ho speaks to mo when wo meet,
I notice a coldness. Whnt shall
I do? . ANXIOUS HAZEL.
Thanksgiving has boon set for No
vembor 2Jth. Oregon should give
thanks It had no, election, with tho
religious Issue Involved. ' '
Tho Emperor has started, suit, to
prevent somo of his leading 'subjects
getting kontrol of tho kash,(rcglsters.
MOO!
Bummer 1h over, tho old cow said.
And they'll shut mo up In tho draughty
shed
To milk mo by lamplight In tho cold,
Hut I won't glvo much for I am old.
It's long ago that I camo hero
Oayind slim as a woodland doer;
And now thero nro bones where my
flesh should be.
My backbono sags like an old rooftroe
And an appto snatched In a moment's
frolio '-v
Is Just so many days of colic.
I'm neither a Jersey nor Ifolstoln
now.
But only n faded sort of cow.
My.'Calves aro veal, and I had ns lief
That I could lay mo down as beef.
Hnmchow, they nlwnys kill by halves:
Why not take mo whon they tako my
. calves?
Birch turns yellow and sumac red,
I'vo seen this all before, she said.
I'm tired of the field and tired ot tho
; shod.
Thoro's no moro grnss, thoro'a no
moro clover.
Summer Is over, summer Is ovor.
i?; . (ltobort lllllyor.)
Death Toll of
the Automobile
SAI.E.M, Ore., Nov. 6. Stepping
into tho highway to signal tho driver
of nn approaching enr that sho wish
ed to -ride Into town, cost Mrs. Au
gust Blttner of Dallas, her life Just
after dark Inst evening in tho out
skirts of Dallas.
Mrs! Htttner was run down nnd
killed Instantly by tho automobile
driven by Oren Farley of Dnllns, who
said that ho did not see tho woman
until his rnr was almost upon her.
PUT STOMACH IN
ORDER AT ONCE
'Tape's Diapcpsin" for
: Gas, Indigestion or
Sour Stomach
Instantly! fcitomai-h corrected! You
never feet ilia slightest distress from
indigestion or a sour, acid, gnssy stom
ach, after you eat a tablet of "Pane's
Diapepsin." The moment it reaches the
stomach all sourness, flatulence, heart
burn, gasea, palpitation and pain dis
appear. Druggists guarantee each pack
ago to correct dipyntion t once. KnJ
your stomach troublo fur few cents.
DON'T FORGET TO VOTE..
flu: duty of all jruod citizens to go to the jjoIIh and vote.
As the polls are open until 8 p. m., there is no excuse for not
voting. Anyone can mark a ballot at this election in three seconds.
There are 12 hours in which to do it. Three seconds out of over 400,
000 is rather a small average when one comes to think about it.
The secret ballot is necessary, but secrecy surrounding a list of
.'hose who go to the polls is not necessary at all. In fact, nothing
would do more to advance the cause of good government than to
publish after caeh election the names of those who voted, j
Then the franchise slackers would bo known. And it would be in
teresting to know them. For there is no reason to believe that many
of those who cuss the government the liardest, do the least to deter
mine wliat tneir government should do. . , .
A law. allowing only those who vote, the sacred privelege of
finding fault with election results, would contribute mightily to bet
ter citizenship und to the advancement of public peace and tran
quility, j v
Personal Health Service
By WILLIAM BRADY, M. D.
Not J Phyiician and Author
Signed letters pertaining to personal health and hygiene, not to di
sease diagnosis or treatment, will be answered by Dr. Brady If a stamped,
self addressed envelope Is enclosed. Letters should be brief and written In
ink. Owing to the large number of letters received, only a few can ba an
swered here. No reply can ba mads to queries not conforming to Instruc
tions. Address Dr. William Brady, In cars of this newspaper.
Get Fat and Grow Old
QUILL POINTS
High wiircs. however, can't satisfy a poor colored boy who is
pining for high temperature.
If a slap on the back encourages him, lie is climbing; if it in
sults him, he has arrived.
But think how unhappy Harvey will be when he can be indiscreet
without anybody caring a darn.
The next congress will be much like those of the past, except for
a slight Russian accent.
The modern wet who shrieks for liberty or death can patronize a
bootlegger and have both.
Under 30 a little fat, just a nice 7
per cent excess weight, say, keeps 'em
young and happy. After 30 every
little pound added to what you really
ought to carry helps to hurry you on
to the grave. The way I dwell on this
might mean that I delight In worry
ing fat folks. I don't. I'm partial
to fat folks, like a Turk, up to a
reasonable point. I
am with 'cm and
for 'em as long as
they do not exceed
that point. I'm will
ing to concede that
It is good nature, a
kind of laugh and
grow fat spirit that
carries 'em up to
the point I have in
mind. They're still
amenable to earnest
may feel he can afford. Everybody
must decide for himself how much his
own life, health or happiness, or what
may remain of them, are worth to
him, and choose his course accord
ingly. I believe that six miles of oxy
gen on the hoof is very cheap medi
cine at all costs; as a rule the less one
feels he can afford it the more good
he derives from the medicine.
Altho suitable exercise in fair doses
is about the best preventive against
abesity, the remedy is not a cure; so
my advice is walk It off before It gets
you.
QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
Is Mr. Billings Present?
I noticed that under the heading,
"Don't Avoid Food," you advised
young mother to eat all the food '.hat
came her way. It seems this woman
WflM eiiffoflntr frnm rhtiilmntlam nnri
warnings. They can, I mlght b8 du0 to too much ncld
If they will, come
back with the help of a little sympa
thetic counsel and" Instruction. But
I wash my hands of 'em when they
contlnuo headlong right on past em
bonpoint. Once they've drifted be
yond that they grow 111 naturod, hy
persensitive and tochy and I have
found it better to lot thorn severely
alono.
Touching and appertaining to the
cantankerous disposition of heedlessly
fat folk, I have a theory, or perhaps
it is a mere conjecture, that -this
n her system, and you might have
offered some kind of remedy and a
proper diot, and not "everything that
comes you way." That would include
certain acid forming food with starch
material. In ' my estimation you
neither helped this young mother nor
relieved her mental anxiety. I am
writing to criticise and learn. (W.
K. D.)
Answer. Tour fancy that any of
the disease conditions which mas
querade under the name of "rheuma
tism" may be caused by too much
change of disposition which is so Bcld , the y8lcm ba8ed on nothlns
We know at last. The Sphinx represents a vice-president who was
elevated to the presidency.
Fake diamonds tell their own story. They are seldom accompa
nied by sufficient sound sense to earn genuine stones.
If he can take two small fragments of truth and make a large
convincing lie, he is a propagandist.
When a man says ho is standing by the Constitution, he generally
means that he is hiding behind it.
The president's sileneo imposes an unbenrahlo strain on those who
stand waiting with hammers poised.
The reason some people never discover the secret of success is be
cause it is secreted in the sweat glands.
It's strange how many altruistic friends wish to advise a widow
who has a nice bunch of insurance money.
Tho League isn't an impotent organization. It stands ready to
correct any nation that dares to lie little.
Still, if a woman has an artistic temperament, she might as well
spend tho time on her face instead of working that kind of sofa
pillows.
Lot's; not have any more European lecturers until they can think
up a new way to tell us Europo needs America.
A tactful doctor is one who tickles your vanity by assuring you
that your slight disorder is something serious.
As a general thing, people who have chips on their shoulders have
no other weight above tho shoulders worth mentioning.
Old-fashioned sermons on hell wero at least moro thrilling than
these modern sermons on the Teutonic influenco on Lapland psychology.
Correct this sentence: "The boss gavo me somo of his lip today,"
boasted the husband, "and what I told him was a glorious plenty."
Correct this sentence: "I meant to go to Sunday school last Sun
day," said he, "but the church was packed and I couldn't get a scat."
it. 'vr
RipplirtgRhqmos
FAIR BUT FOOLISH.
MY STEP-NIKCK is a beauty, the fairest in tho kiul; tho
young men call her Cutio, and she's in great demand. Sho
drives around vith "Willie in Willie's gaudy wain, and all sho says
is silly, and all i ho does is vain. You never see her reading tho
works of E. P. Rte; you never seo her kneading a lump of wholc
Bomo dough j you never see her sweeping, or making windows
bright, or diligently keeping the homo fires all alight. And yet
she has, dodgast her, suitors six or eight; I weep when I contrast
her with my step-cousin Kate. This latter is a winner, the kind
I most respect; and she can cook a dinner that's gorgeous and
correct. And sho is always dusting, or darning things of mine,
she keeps the spoons from rusting ami makes the windows shine.
And sho would be a treasure as any young man's wife; she'd fill
with wholesome pleasure tho struggling workman's life. But
Kate, whom I've respected since childhood long ago, is lonesome
iid neglected, and never lands a beau. Her chances still di
minish as go the days so fleet; we'll see her at tho finish, in somo
Old Maids' Retreat. "And now the motors tooty come honking to
my gate, and young men call for Outie, and bless her as they wait.
striking may bo caused by a kind of
poisoning, something In tho nature of
autointoxication. Of course autoin
toxication Is itself a mere hypothesis.
a theoretical state. Still. I feel satis
fied in my own mind that frankly if
not irrevocably fat folks are short of
temper because they are virtually
doped all the time with the by pro
ducts of Incomplete combustion.
We know this much, that most out
sizo people have a slow metabolism,
suboxldation or an inadequate sup
ply of oxygen to their tissues. Now
isn't this leading up beautifully to
the ulterior object of our talk today?
If thero Is anything in this autointoxi
cation Inference of mine, it follows
that, a more liberal oxygen ration
would ydo the shamelessly fat folks
a lot of good and make them much
easier to got along with.
Iiefore we approach a line nearer
the limit of our space let me now
postulate the principle that an aver
age dally ration of six miles of oxy
gen on the hoof if by all odds the
beat preventive and the least satis
factory euro for obesity In general.
Ladies and gentlemen of too much
substanco and leisure should have a
that you can find in physiology or
pathology. If you will mention which
foods are "acid forming with starch
material" I'll bring them to the atten
tion of the physiologists who evi
dence haven't learned about them yet.
If I could have told the young mother
precisely what she should or should
not eat I would have done so. In ad
vising her to eat everything that camo
her way and deny herself no particu
lar food or food because of a fancied
"acid forming" effect, I believe I gave
her sound advice and I beg to refer
you to the works of Josh Billings.
Cancer Not Communicable
Is cancer contagious? I work along
side a person who has cancer of thj
stomach and whose father died with
cancer. Am I in danger? (K. G. O.)
Answer. No danger. Cancer is not
communicable.
Rcsorcln
What objection, If any. Is there to
the continuous use of resorcin In a
solution for dandruff and olliness of
the scalp? (Mrs. M. E.)
Answer. I know of none, except
that resorcin sometimes stains white
or very light hair a yellowish color.
A lotion or solution containing 10
thought how they feed, yes, but if i grains each of resorcin and salicylic
they want to stay happy and young ! acid to the ounce of witch hazel ex
they've simply got4o-perambulate, for tract or cologne water or any. toilet
hiking Is the best all around exer-j water or graim alcohol; " ruoba'd-into
else there Is available, daily in every ( the scalp by parting the hair here and
season and all weather. A good six
miles of It, pedomctered, Insures the
absorption of an amount of oxygon
ample to prevent all; ordinary degrees
of autointoxication. .
Walking is too dangerous and too
expensive for many who need it most.
Whoever thinks so must resign him
self to tho doubtful gratification of
such other kinds of exercise as he
there, is excellent for excessive oill-
ness, but the tendency to stain the
hair yellow should be . remembered
and the resorcin discontinued if the
yellowness begins.
Scrofula
"What is scrofula? (E. E. P.)
Answer. An old fashioned name
for tuberculosis of lymph nodes
("glands") in the neck.
.jllillll
"JUST TOWN TALK"
Copied Rlfat B Mike
I COULDN'T sleep
...
BECAUSE IN the room
. .
NEXT TO mine
V
A BABY cried
...
A PLAINTIVE wall
...
THAT WOULDN'T stop
.....
AND I had read
...
THAT yALIClNO tho floor
...
AND SINGING a song
...
WOULD STOP the noise
....
OP A crying babe
...
SO I got up
...
AND WENT In
. ... 1
WHERE THE youngster cried
...
AND PICKED him up
...
AND STARTED la
...
TO SING A song
. .
AND RIGHT away
. . .
THAT BABY stopped
...
BUT IT must have been
...
HE WAS Just surprised
...
AT THE competition
...
FOR HE started again
...
LOUDER THAN over
...
ON A hlghor note
.
AND SO did I
BUT I was mad
...
AND TOLD myself
...
I'D GET him to sleep
...
IF I had to wake up
...
THE WHOLE neighborhood
AND I tried Jazi
...
AND LULLABIES
...
BUT THEY didn't work
. . -
FOR THE poor kid
. . .
THOUGHT THAT I was
...
MOCKING HIM
...
AND I walked ten miles
...
DOING MY stuft -
...
AND I had reached
THE ANVIL Chorus
...
WHEN I could feel
...
HE WAS weakening "
FOR HIS CRIES
...
WERE NOT so loud
...
AS THOSE of mine
. . . '
AND BY the timo
. . -
I HAD reached
. a
"NEARER MY God to Thee"
. - -
HE WAS ALMOST through ..
...
AND FAILING fast
...
AND SO It was
...
WHEN I started In
...
ON "OLD BLACK Joe"
...
HE CONCEDED defeat
...
AND SHUT his eyes
...
AND WE both went back
...
TO OUR warm beds
...
BOTH TIRED out
...
FROM ALL our noise
...
I THANK you.
THE GIIEATKST THING IN THE
WORLD
By Laurel aray.
I i i j Out You Beat It?
I stroll into my ft-vorlto bock shop.
I am surprised. Instead of novels,
fiction selections as tho little clerk
calls "em. thors
aro stacks and
stacks of books
of essays. And
curiously enough,
four volumes out
of five, deal with
the rather large
and comprehen
sive motif to
which this col
umn is devoted.
T.ove! t-onv! n'f
the wrlrors call It
it s e x . attraction.
. They aro tho K-i-
entlsf Broup the , psycho-analysts,
the sociologists, the metaphysicians,
and the M.D.'a. Although what In the
world they know about It. beyond
their own pale experiences, I'm
i T knniu Th on h&r,t is
another group of writers tho critics
the Ironists, the satirists ana ino ii-m-
nn.i ha nntf-fpmlnlflts. Mv
good friend, H. L, Mencken, pays the
tribute to women mat iney at-.
1 enPA.nn nmrn IntpllifTCnt
and altogether smarter than men and
that, therefore, tney aro nappier in
love and more profoundly (although
not so easily) satiKfied in tho love ex
cursion. W. L. George, from tho op
posite premise insists that women are
vainer, sillier, emptier and weaker
than men, and that, thorefore, dear
little brcaturo, they aro happier nnd
more easily satisfied In lovo affairs
than men. "But all these books aro
written by men,". I protested, to the
little clerk. Ho blushed. "Yes, I
see, thero isn't any demand for the
books written about women y wom
en. 1 sunDOse nobodv thinks that
women understand women. It takes
a man to do that.
(Copyright John F. Dllle Co.)
ASPIRIN
Say "Bayer" and Insist!
.With Medford trade Is Medford made,
Unless you see Ho name "Raver" on
package or on tablets you' are not got
tho genuine Bayer product pre
scribed by physicians over twenty-two
fears and proved safe by mil Lions fox
Colds Headache
Toothache Lumbago
Earacho Rheumatism
Neuralgia Pain, Pain
Accept "Bayer Tablets of ABpirin"
only, Each unbroken package contacts
proper directions. Handy boxes of
twelve tablets coat few cents. Drug
gists also sell bottles of 24 and 100.
Aspirin is the trudo mark of Baynr
Manufacture of Mouoacoticaoidestcr fi
Sblicylicacid.
Close-in Home
With Income
For Sale
Owner of Home ot 323
South Riverside will sell at a
reasonable price, and liberal
terms on deferred payments,
at 6 per cc"nt.
. Home is modern, large lot,
lots of shade, property in
rear may be included or ex
cluded, according to desire
of purchaser. Income from
apartment nnd sleeping
rooms.
See owner at 325 South
Riverside for particulars.
WATCH YOUR
BATTERY
PRJEST-O-IJTE BATTERY
STATION .
'Friendly rWrlctt"
Phoaa VOf
Kodak Finishing
tat thoM who deosaad Out best.
Swem's Studio
117 E. Hail) Medford
Medford Iron Works
On Specialty
Medford Quartz Mill
Mining and Sawmill Machinery.
General Foundry and Machine
Work.
US Jf. Central It.
Mss Tawney Apple hns one c"
. tlicru now lints that looks like
part of wot rooster. Who rc-.
members when wo could Ret
away from women by lonfln' In
a cigar store. .
- Cut This Out It rs Worth Money
Send this ad and ten cents to Foley
& Co., 2835 Sheffield Ave., Chicago,
111., writing your name and address
clearly. You will receive a ten cent
bottle -of Foley's Honey and Tar for
Coughs, Colds, and Croup, also free
sample packages of Foley Kidney
Pills for Backache, Rheumatic Fains,
Kidney and Bladder trouble, and
Foley Cathartic Tablets for Constipa
tion and Biliousness. These wonder
ful remedies have helped millions of
people. Try them! Sold everywhere.'
" Adv.'
BARTLETT
FURS
With M. M. Store
Medford Bldg. ,
Proper Mechanical Equip
ment, plus experienced skill
insures A-l DRY CLEAN
ING SERVICE.
Remember "We are not
satisfied unless you are."
City Cleaning
and Dyeing Co.
624 N, Riverside Phone 474
The Day of the Knight la HEBE
c
3
Do you know that
high-priced foreign
cars have Knight
Mo tor 8? :
, Let Your Next
Car Be a
WILLYS KNIGHT
The Busy Corner
Motor Co.
The Day ot the Knight Is HERE