Last Spring My Health Was completely broken down through prolonged watching at a sick bed. My appetite was gone. I was so nervous that I could not sleep. I be­ came pale, thin, languid, tired, looked ten years older. Through physical weakness my mental condition was affected. Hood's Sarsaparilla re­ stored me to perfect health. It aided the worn- out nerves o f my stomach to do their duty. I could soon eat and sleep peacefully and felt new life course through my veins. With­ in six weeks I was my former self, and for a year have enjoyed the best health.” Julia C. Tison, Atlantic City, N. J. For your Spring Medicine, blood purifier and strength builder, take Hood’s S a rsap a rilla Sold everywhere. Get a bottle today. 1 A L L A U T H O R S A R E ,T A L K A T I V E | If You K now One, Be Ta ctful and Let H im Converse About Hie W o rk . | F or Sale—300 a. D ouglas Co., W ash.; 150 a. cult., 7-r. house, barn, outbid#», bearing orchard, stock, m achinery, etc. J . M. K inney, M ansfield, W ash. F or Sale— 240 a in Chelan Co., W ash.; about 100 a. cu lt.; 5-r. house. 2 barns, outbldgs., 6-a. orchd; stock, m achinery, e tc., e ve ryth in g com plete. J . F. Daniel, W en atch — , W ash., R . N o. 1. F or Sale—58 a In D ouglas Co., W ash., nr Orondo; 50 a. cult., beat p rod u cin g orchards in the state; 6-room house, barn, outbuildings, stock, m achin­ ery. _________ A . J . E liiott, Orondo, W ash. M A K E BIG M ON EY! B e ou r representative. Easy sales anyw here. Show sam ples and take orders. N o risk. D on ’ t w ait; write today. Dept. 12, R oom 812, W ilcox B ldg., Portland, Or 4 Second-H and Machin­ ery bought, sold and _ exchanged: fn g in e s , boilers, sawmills, etc. T he J. E. M artin Co.. 83 1st St.. Portland. Send fo r Stock List and prices. Machinery W a t s o n E . C o le m a n , Patent law yer,W ashington D.U. A d vice and books free. Rates reasonable. H ighest references. Best services. PATENTS B A N D M E N : K : £ ,e HOLTON and BUESCHER band instrum ents. The m ost com plete stock o f M usical M erchandise in the N orthw est. W rite fo r Catalogues. SE1BERLING-LUCAS MUSIC CO. 134 Second Street, Portland. Oregon Your Farm, Orchard, Hop Yajd or Garden W ill yield tw ice as m uch as it does now . W an t to know how? CORRECT FERTILIZING I know nothing about really great j authors, but I tfilnk I speak for a large number of the followers of the trade ¡when 1 say that they like to talk about their work, one great rea­ son being that writing is a lonely pro­ fession. If you write, as a rule you must do it (by yourself; or If you do attempt It In company, you or the company will be sorry. Therefore, when the writing Is done, and a sym­ pathetic listener offers, (the writer Is glad to wipe out some of the lonely hours with a little conversation. So, if you know an author, don’t be too breathless,about his calling; treat him like a human being. Let him talk a little, and do not be shocked if he manages to keep the tears back when he (tells you about his last short story. Only, be tactful. Do not say, as an eager acquaint­ ance once said to me: "Oh, I do think it (is so Interesting to write. It must be Just fascinating when your manu­ scripts come back!” I discovered af­ terward that she meant proofs In­ stead of manuscripts, but the mistake of Just (that single word made me, who am usually so garrulous about my trade, feel for the time being that I really did not care ever to speak of it again. ( So I repeat, let the poor author talk, but be tactful.—Atlantic Monthly. When Your Eyes Need Care T r y M a r in e E y e R e m aedy. edy. N o 8 S m a r t in g — F e e l* F i n e — A c t s Q u ic k ly y . T r y It It f o r R ed , W eak, W a t e r y E y e s a n d G I r a n u la t e d E y e lid s . U lus- com pounded by o u r O culist«—nut . " P a t e n t Med­ icin e ” — but used In au cce ssfu l P h y sicia n s' Prac­ tice f o r m any years. Now dedicated to th e Pub­ lic and sold by llru gglsts a t 26o and AOc per Bottle. M urine Uyo S alve la A se p tic T u bes, 25c and 60o. M urine Eye Rem edy C o., C h icago Recover Stolen Tom bstone. A stolen tombstone was unearthed Our rert il izere have been during excavations following a recent tried out and they have fire in a shop In Girvan (Ayr.). The won out every time. They are prepared by skilled workmen dug out a tombstone In an and experienced chem ­ ists and tested by practi­ excellent state of preservation, bear­ cal farmers. They will ing the following inscription; “ By An­ bring BIG RETURNS to YOU. thony Campbell, Saddler, In Memory PACIFIC GUANO & F E R T IL IZE R CO. of His Daughter, Jean. Died July 1st, 182 M adison St., Portland, Or. 1826, Aged 18 Years and Six Months.” It Is believed that the stone was stolen from the old Girvan churchyard and converted Into a heartstone, a quite P ove rty's Gradations. common occurrence in the early days "Poor” has many gradations of of the nineteenth century.—London meaning. A small newsboy, who is a Mail. _________________ familiar figure at ¡the city hall and shows great affection for Assistant W ord Much Misused. Joe Ryan's dogs, overheard some one j “ Fix” is one of the words that we speak of him as "that poor boy” the Americans habitually misuse, but It Is other day, and exclaimed: ) not often that the mistake leads to “ That man has no right to call me such absurdity as It does in the label poor boy. We ain’t poor. Why, at of a certain stain-remover now on the our place on James street ¡we have market. “ It will fix the stain,” says three rooms, and six people sleep In the notice. Since “ fix" means to make one and seven in the other, and they permanent, the manufacturers of the pay us ten cents a night, ¡too. We i stain-remover have not said quite ain't poor. Lots of the other fellers what they intended to say.—Youth’s only have one room.” Companion. “ How many sleep In the other room, George?” asked Ryan. May W ard O ff Pneumonia. “ Why, only me and pop and mom Here Is a recipe which a physician and my two brothers and two sisters. me several years ago, says a Say, we ain’t poor.”—New York Press. gave writer, and I have used It In my fam­ ily ever since. For coughs, colds or One at a Tim e. any bronchial trouble saturate a flan­ "The head of the Krupp steel works nel cloth and apply to chest: Turpen­ has 65,000 employes.” “Nothing to tine liniment—Take a pint bottle, put brag of,” opined the housewife. ‘T’ve in white of one egg, shake well, add had that many in my kitchen, but not four tablespoonfuls turpentine, shake all at once.”—Louisville Courier-Jour­ till foamy than fill with good vinegar; nal. shake well. Our knowledge is j free to you. Our book | full o f valuable in- j form ation is free to ! you. W rite fo r it and ; let us help you in- | crease your crops j and improve your | land. Mistaken View . Excuse Hunting. Strange tricks our vanity will play, Dodge—“What’s the matter with and egotistic is life's plan. A fish, your cooking here lately?” Mrs. Dodge which grabbed a hook one day, at first —"The gas company doesn't give us believed he’d caught a man! as good gas as it used to.”—Kansas City Times. H is « Mistake. W IL S O N B R E A K S P R E C E D E N T S R. L. 8. IN T H E A D IR O N D A C K « D elivers M essage in Person and Is Stevenson, W h ils Fighting O ff Dis­ ease Th ere. Seemed Indifferent to the Law s of Health. Roundly Cheered. Washington, D. C. -President Wil­ son bridged Tuesday the gap that for over a century has separated the ex­ ecutive and legislative branches of the government. Not as a cog in a machine, noi as an impersonal political entity, nor as a mere department o f government, but as the human President, he went to congress to speak'about a tariff. Gigantic Bog Oak Tre e . Standing before the senate and Twenty tons of bog oak were re­ house o f representatives in joint ses­ cently unearthed at Llanwrtyd Wells, sion as no other president had done Wales. It measures 48 feet long with for more than 112 years, President | a diameter of 2 feet 9 Inches. This giant oak tree Is by far the largest Wilson stated simply and tersely what which has been found within memory he thought should be done for the wel­ i on the peat land near Llanwrtyd. Por­ tions of It have been exposed for some fare o f the country and asked his years, but no one thought It of such legislative colleagues, man to man, to dimensions and no Interest was taken aid in keeping the pledges o f their J in it until a few years ago. party. Why He was Glad. W th a sw e e p o f decision that shat­ The man with the long beard stood tered precedent, the President brushed aside all imaginary boundaries be­ pensively at the curbing gazing at tween congress and the executive the passing traffic In the street. “ I hail with delight the advent of the office, and rescued himself, as he ex­ automobile,” he muttered aloud, "for pressed it, “ from that isolated island no longer need 1 fear crossing the of jealous authority” which the presi­ street lest some hungry horse mistake dency had come to be regarded. me for a walking bale of hay." Congress, somewhat startled the D aily Thought. other day when it heard that the Pres­ Such are the habitual thoughts, ident had determined to deliver his message on the tariff by word of such also will be the character of thy mind, for the soul is dying by the mouth, had prepared for a ceremony thoughts.—Marcus Aurelius. of unusual importance, and such it was; yet when President Wilson ar­ rived in the midst o f the great as­ | l ■ ■ ^ semblage, riding through throngs of cheering people in the streets and later looking up into galleries crowded with privileged ticket-holders, he seemed, after all, what he said he was — “ a human being trying to co-operate H to have to endure dis- ^ with other human beings in a common tress after every meal. service.” When the much-heralded incident No wonder you are was over, congress seemed pleased and the President was delighted. He ex­ afraid to eat. Just try pressed himself to friends as impress­ ed with the dignity o f the occasion, and some o f his confidants later de­ clared that he left the capitol greatly relieved to think that, after all, his precedent-smashing had not been such a cataclysmic thing as some older heads had predicted. before meals for a few The President’s visit to the capitol was brief, lasting about a quarter of days and notice the im­ an hour. Leaving a cabinet meeting provement in your gen­ at the White House, he started on his mission accompanied by no one except eral health. It is for all a secret service man. He rode in a White House automobile and five min­ Stomach and Bowel Ills. utes later was driven through the Start Today. crowds assembled about the house wing o f the capitol. At two minutes before 1 o ’clock the President entered the chamber. Mem­ bers o f the house and senate rose as The M iser. Speaker Clark brought down the gavel. "Here,” said Teddy’s papa, showing From the floor and galleries distin­ the little boy a coin, “ Is a penny 300 guished guests looked on at the scene. years old. It was given to me when I President Wilson, escorted by Sen­ was a little boy.” "Gee whiz!” ejacu­ ator Bacon, bowed acknowledgment to lated Teddy, “Just think of anybody the applause and mounted the speak­ being able to keep a penny as long as er’ s stand to the journal clerk’s desk, that without tpendlng It.” directly in front o f the speaker. With a smile, as he began to speak, the President told his heaters why he had come. He said he was glad to verify for himself the impression that Munyon’s Paw-Paw the President o f the United States Pillsare unlike all oth­ was a person. er laxatives or cathar­ tics. They coax the He was speaking in an ordinay'tone liver into activity by of voice, just as though he were talk­ gentle methods, they ing to a senator in his office. Every do not scour; they do eye was fixed upon him as he spoke, not gripe; they do not and it was instantly apparent that he weaken; but they do had aroused the keenest interest. As start all the secretions the President proceeded with his pre­ of the liver and stom­ liminary statement, averring that he ach in a way that soon had come to speak naturally with his puts these organs in a fellow men, the interest was tense. healthy condition and “ A fter this pleasant experience,” corrects constipation. Munyon’s Paw-Paw the President declared, “ I shall feel Pills are a tonic to the stomach, liver and quite normal in all our dealings with nerves. They invigorate instead of weaken; one another.” they enrich the blood instead of impover­ The house and senate applauded. ishing it; they enable the stomach to get all Then the gallery joined in. Mrs. Wil­ the nourishment from food that is put into son and the President’s daughters and U. Price 25 cents. All Druggists. other relatives joined from the execu­ tive gallery. Where a few moments Th e Match. before the event had seemed unusual, Knlcker—What did they have In almost unreal, it now appeared per­ common? fectly adjusted to conditions and not Bocker—Gardening. He had a busi­ at all dramatic. The applause subsid­ ness plant and she had widow’s ing the President began to read his weeda. brief message on the tariff. “It's No Joke” HOSTETTER’S STOMACH BITTERS CONSTIPATION P rin t Paper and Pulp Free. Litera l. "Why have you quarreled with your Washington, D. C— John Norris, of cousin?” “ He kissed me the other "Do you like my execution on the the committee on paper o f the Amer­ day, and when I asked him to promise piano?” "I must say I would have me never to do it again, be actually to describe it as an execution for kill­ ican News Publishers’ association, said: “ The practical effect o f the did.” ing time.” proposed tariff bill upon news print paper and pulps will be to admit news print paper and pulps free o f duty from all the world, without qualifica­ tion o f any sort. Chemical pulp is al­ so admitted free o f duty from all na­ tions with the exception that chemical pulp must pay $2 per ton from those Canadian provinces which prohibit ex­ portation o f pulp wood. A READY MADE HOUSE $400 All ready for occupancy. Al! you have to do is drive a few nails and move in. Plans and instructions accompany ma­ terial. House built so as to be just what our climatic condi­ tions require. We have been in the Mill Material business for twenty-seven years and our ability and integrity are un­ questioned. We absolutely guarantee satisfaction. T o n g Leaders Subpenaed. « Anything you want in mill material we can supply you at factory cost. No order too small or none too large to re­ ceive our prompt and best attention. Send for our Free Book of Floor Plans and Catalogue of Mill Material. San Francisco— The grand jury has decided that the best way to prevent a continuation o f tong warfare in China­ town is to lock up the warriors. It has issued aubpenas for the presidenta and other officials o f the belligerent Bing Kong and Suey Sing tongs and all gunmen. Heads of the police de­ partment and District Attorney Fick- ert were also ordered to appear before the inquisitorial body. The grand jury expects to indict every Chinese against whom proof is adduced o f con­ spiracy to commit murder. C anadians'jW atch T ariff. Ottawa, Ont.—The probable effect in Canada o f the tariff changes by the congress o f the United States will be PORTLAND, OREGON. worked out by Canadian experts and until their verdict is submitted it is unlikely that any official opinion will be expressed here regarding the meas­ ure. Individually, however, the mem­ bers o f the parliament believed that The North Pacific College was estab­ the Dominion would reap material lished in 1898. It has departments of benefit from the new schedules. Dentistry and Pharmacy. No school in C anada W in s Im m igran ts. America has better facilities for the train­ ing of young men and women for success­ Ottawa, Ont.—Canada’* immigra­ ful professional careers. The annual ses­ tion figures for the fiscal year just sion begins October First. An illustrated ended show a phenomenal increase ■•ata'og o f information will be forwarded over those o f last year and will be the upon application to largest in the country’s history. For the 10 months to February 1, 345,000 foreigners srrived. Of these, 130,000 were British subjects and 119,000 cit­ Eat S xth and Oreria Sis.. Ftrtlaad, Ore. izens of the United States. NORTH W EST DOOR COM PAN Y North Pacific College of Dentistry and Pharmacy ? Registrai, Norlh Pacific College Cough, Cold SoreThroat Sloan’s liniment gives quick relief for cough, cold, hoarseness, s o r e t h r o a t , croup, asthma, hay fever and bronchitis. H E R £’3 PR O O F. M r . A l b e r t W . P r ic e , o f F redon U , K a n ., w rit«« : “ W e use S loan ’s L ini­ m ent in the fam ily and find it an e x ­ ce lle n t relief for co ld s and hay fever attacks. It co u c h in g and aneex- ing alm ost in sta n tly .’ ' SLOANS Robert Louis Stevenson, for so wise a man, seems to have been singularly unaware of, or Indifferent to, ¡the laws of health, but that, too, may have been part of Ills wisdom. He spent the winter of 1887 in the Adlrondacks struggling ¡against the disease which was not to subdue him for seven years. He lived in a little cottage that was much overheated and from which all ventlltalon was carefully excluded. The ¡smoke of his Incessant cigarettes obscured the atmosphere and perhaps helped to drive away the visitors who came to gaze upon him as one gazes at a lion In a den. ( Fashionable call­ ers were specially unwelcome and Stevenson once remarked, according to an account In the Medical Record, that ‘ It Isn't the great f unwashed which I’d read, but the great washed.” But whoever else was unwelcome there was always a greeting for Rich­ ard Mansfield. It (Is an Impressive, al­ most a tremendous picture, that of the clouded room fitfully lit by the flames of the log fire and Stevenson huddled close to the ¡warmth while Mansfield at the other end of the room gave his weird Impersonation of Dr. Jek'yll and Mr. Hyde. It must have been like Cod looking ¡upon hla handiwork and finding it good. FREE ADVICE F o r th e c u r e an d p r e v e n t io n o f e v e r y diaeaae w ith H ERBS—N ATU R E’ S OWN REMEDIES. A re y o u s ic k ? H a v e y o u a f r ie n d t h a t ’ s s ick ? W r it e to d a y f o r s y m p t o m b la n k an d w e w ill d ia g n o s e y o u r c a s e fr e e o f c h a r g e a n d tell y o u w h a t re m e d ie s a r e n e e d e d t o c u r e y o u r ­ s e l f a t h o m e . A id D e p t . A m e r ic a n H e rb D o c ­ t o r , 4158 A r c a d e B ld g ., S e a ttle , W ash . GIRL SUFFERED TERRIBLY A t Regular Intervals— Say* Lydia E. Pinkham’s Vege­ table Compound com­ pletely cured her. Adrian, Texas.—“ I take pleasure in adding my testimonial to the great list and hope that it will be of interest to suf­ fering women. For four years I suffered untold a g o n ie s at r e g u la r intervals. S u ch p a in s and cramps,severe chills andsicknessat stom­ ach, then finally hem­ orrhages u n t il I would be n e a r ly blind. I had five doctors and none of them could do more than relieve me for a time. “ I saw your advertisement In a pa­ per and decided to try Lydia E. Pink- ham’s Vegetable Compound. I took seven boxes of it and used two bottler of the Sanative Wash, and I am com pletely cured o f my trouble. When 1 began taking the Compound I only weighed ninety-iix pounds and now 1 weigh one hundred and twenty-six pounds. If anyone wishes to addrea:- me in person I will cheerfully answer all letters, as I cannot speak too highly of the Pinkham remedies.” —Mias J E S ­ SIE M a r s h , Adrian, Texas. Hundreds of such letters expressing gratitude for the good Lydia E. Pink- ham’s Vegetable Compound has accom­ plished are constantly being received, proving the reliability o f this grand old remedy. “DIDN’T HURT A BIT” P r l o o , 2 5 a ., 8 0 o . , $ U 0 0 SHOES FOR MEN AND WOMEN MEN* •UU-FI B £ S T B O Y S S H O E S In th e W ORLD $ 2. 00. $ 2 .50 a n d S 3.00 M|M> GOTHAM T h e la rg e st m a k e rs o f M e n ’s $ 3 . 5 0 a n d $ 4 . 0 0 s h o e s in t h e w o r ld . A * k y o u r d e a le r t o «h o w you IV . L D o u g la a » 3 . .to. S 4 .0 0 an o » 4 ..QQ *4 -5 0 AND »fi.OO You Need M r s . L . B r e w e r , o f M '.d e llo ,F la ., w rites: “ I b ou g h t o n e b ottle «*f you r L in im en t and i t d id m e a l l the good in the w orld . M y th r o a t was very «ora, an d 1* c u r e d m e o f m y tro u b le .” GOOD FOR COLD AND CROUP. VOMCN^ “ What made you take down that Absent-Minded Man H a t Some D iffi­ sign ’No Agents or Solicitors Allowed In This Building?” ’ “ It’s no use any culty at tha Book Store and more," replied the Janitor. “ Anybody the Grocers’. who wants to take down the public's As the little man walked absent- spare change nowadays gets out a mindedly along the sidewalk he sud­ Each Pew a Heater. prospectus and uses postage stamps.” A Nuremberg church seating 1,200 denly stopped in front of a bookstore. It recalled to him the meaning of that has nn electric heater for each pew. W ould Leave Nature Alone. A three-inch iron tube incloses a piece of string on his finger, and with ‘‘When Nature has decided on the a brightened face he entered. smaller tube wound with resistance “Just a minute,” he said to the color of an eye, It Is not for man to wire, and this heater runs in front of clerk. “ My wife wanted me to get alter It,” remarked Mr. Plowden it the seat and along the back of the a book for her—a certain novel she’s Marylebone in fining a man for black­ pew ahead. Each heater has its own heard a good deal about. I must find ening another mane optic.—Loudon switch. the memorandum she gave me. She Chronicle. Mothers w ill find Mrs. W inslow 's Soothing wrote the name on a slip of paper, Byrup t.T e best rem edy to uso *or their children and I put it in my pocket.” during .he teeth in g period. After considerable fumbling he pro­ duced a small bit of paper, and laying Th e Lesser E vil, He—Yes, I’m going to apply may tal­ It on the counter, took out hts spec­ ents; but 1 don’t know whether to go tacles and adjusted them on Ills nose. NO “ SPRING MEDICINE” “ Here’s the name Cobb’s Corna- II you keep your liver active, your bowels In for art or poetry. tine. Yes, that’s It." regular and your dlgeatlon good She—Oh, poetry! “ I—I’m afraid I don’t know the j He—Oh, you’ve heard some of my book, sir,” said the clerk apologetical­ verses? She— No; but I’ve seen some of your ly, “ but I’ll look through the list of new ones.” And he ran his eye over art.—Judge. 1 the list on the wall. "No, I’m sorry D on ’ t bu y w ater fo r bluing. Liquid blue 1, al- to say I can't find It here. You are all water. B u y R od Croaa Ball blue, the sure of the name?" C oat ue th at’ s all blue. “ Yes, it's right here on this piece of paper.” E vil of U ntruth. “ Well, I’m afraid we haven't g ot; Truth la cleverer and healthier than falsehood. It is more aristocratic. It then.” "But—but I don’t dare to go home | Like self-control, it is one of the hall marks of a lady. Lies are a malaria to my wife without It. 1 promised t o ! that eats Into character like a dis get.it for her.” The clerk called to another In th e! ease and breaks down its citadels back of the store, who came forward. against the approach of evil. To the other he said: "Say, Bill, do you know of,a book called Cornatlne, Th o u g h t of It. On Each Automobile. For a thing that springs mostly by a fellow named Cobb?" "What's that?” he asked In aur- from badly digested misinformation, O ur co-op era tive sales plan en­ public sentiment Is amazingly often prlse. ables you to buy a brand new au­ The old | gentleman broke In: right.—Puck. tom obile; only $476 required, bal­ "Cobb’e Cornatlne. Here, see for your­ ance eaay terms. F or full partic­ self.” ulars address Some Measure of Love Im portant. "I’m afraid you've made a mistake,” It Is best to love wisely, no doubt; but to love foolishly Is better than said the new arrival iwith a twinkle. GERL1NGER MOTOR CAR CO. “ Cobb's Cornatlne is a new breakfast not to be able to love at all.—Thack 690 W ashington Street. food.” eray. “Ah, now I see why the grocer PORTLAND, OREGON. didn't understand ,mo when I asked him for a package of Queen," remark­ ed the customer In manifest relief. —G. Kaemmerling in Puck. I f you want special advice write to Lydia E. Pinkham Medicine Co. (confi­ dential) Lynn, Mass. Your letter will be opened, read and answered by a woman and held In strict confidence. LINIMENT W. L. DOUGLAS ia w h a t th e y a ll « a y o f our PainloM Method* of Extracting Teeth. O u t-of-tcw n p*o- ,1 « can h a re their p iste end bridga- w oi k finished In one d ev if nreeeeerv. A n ebeolute su e r entee. becked by M yeere in Portland. Wise Dental C o . o rn e r ho u rs : • A. M I a fi P. M. Su Ad Ars f U 1 P h e a cst A 2 0 2 9 ; M els 2 0 2 * . f s r t l s f B ld g ., Third s a d W a a M s fls s , P ortla n d PUTNAM To Breaf: In New Shoes. A lw a y s s h a k o In A lle n 's F oot liase, a p o w d e r . ¡5 c u r e s h o t , s w e a tin g , a c h i n g , s w o lle n feet, ^ r e s c o r n s , I n g r o w in g n a ils a n d b u n io n s . A t d r u g g is t s a n d s h o e s tores, 25c. D o n t a c c e p t *ny s u b s titu te . Ham p ie m at led F U L L . A ddresa A llen 8. O lm s te d , Lo H oy. N. Y. In Claeelc Boeton. Sign« seen In Boston, according to the Transcript: Placard at a moving picture show: “ Young children must have parents.” In a barber shop win­ dow: “ During alterations patrons will be shaved In the back.” Sign In a Tremont street store: "Empty boxes— suitable for ChrlBlmas gifts." In a, tailor's shop: “ Wo dye for others, why j not let us dye for you?" In a cloth­ ing store: ’’These pants will look bet­ ter on your legs than on our hands." A silversmith has a place noxt door to a restaurant. The former having put up a placard: “Jewelry of all kinds plated.” The restaurant keeper fol­ lowed with this: "Oyatera and little neck clams plated.” T O CURE A COLD IN O N E D A T T k k . L A X A T I V E BK O M O q u in in e Tablet*. D ru g g ists refu n d m oney i f 1 1 fells to cure. E. W . G R O V E 'S sign atu re is on eech box- 26c. Fort 8cott W itticism . At a recent bnnquent In Fort 8 cott the Tribune says, a man was called upon to make a speech. Of course he was surprised that he should be asked to talk, but he was equal to the oc­ casion, and he stood up and said: 'Gentlemen, you have been eating a turkey stuffed with aage, now you will listen to a sage stuffed with turkey.” Everybody laughed and the man Im­ mediately became known as a famous wag, ami the mot is highly esteemed In those parts.—Kansas City Star. MR. A. H. POWELL, Manufacturing Chemist, Spokane. Wash. Dear S ir : Having angered with stomach trouble for a number o f years, anil tried a Kraut many doctors and a grout many pro­ prietary preparations but obtained no per­ manent relief until 1 took your stomach remedy, and am planned to nay that I have no further atomach trouble and can eat any­ thing I desire and suffer no bud ranultn. I am a profennlonnl nurm, having nursed for 3D years, some o f the tim e for Dr. H olb o f New York City, the greutent specialist on child­ ren's di seme« ; also had charge of Wardner Ho*pital at Wardner. Idaho, for two year*. Since learning by ^niy own experience the great benefit from the use o f Powell'* Stom­ ach Remedy, I have recommended it to n great many for children and adults, and in each oa*e It 1ms been rernnrknble for the good It has done. 1 cheerfully recommend it to anyone suffering with any kind o f «tom- neh trouble, as I am anxious to aid anyone suffering from sickness of any kind, and I have never known o f medicine to compare with Powell's Stomach Remedy for all kinds o f stoinaoh trouble. Yours truly, ELH1K HTKINF.il. Z120 Boone Ave. GET MY OPINION Then iee If the Remedies I Furnish Do Not Improve Your Condition. W a ter *n bluing la adulteration tllaaa ____ and i ter m ake _____ liquid _ ___________ blue ccatly. B u . y R R e ed d Croaa Ball Hue, m akes clothes w hiter than enow . Appreciate Your Blessings. Don't kick beesuse you hsve to but­ ton your wife’s waist. Be glad your wife has s waist, and doubly glad you have a wife to button a wal»t for. Some men's wives’ waists have not bottons on to button. Some men's wives' waists who have buttons on to button don't care a rontlnental wheth­ er they are buttoned or not. Some men don't have any wives with waists For years I hare been established in with buttons on to button.—Teague Portland and an snow letters from (Tex.) Chronicle. former patients living indifferent parts of the orthwest as to the honesty of PILES CURED IN • TO 14 DATS my claims. If you are s sufferer from Ynur dru ggist w ill refund m oney If P A Z O O IN T­ M E N T fe lls to cu re any ceee o f Itch in g , Blind. some sort of sickness vou will do well Bleeding o r P rotrudln* Piles In • to 14 dare. 40e- to consult me, or if you live too far away, write me of your condition. For Story Jones Tells. 4 cents I will sen-’ you a consultation Some years ago In a western min­ blank and circular so that my famous ing town a man was found dead in his Chinese herb and root remedies m ay hotel room hanged to a bedpost by be had. . ____ his suspenders. The jury of miners brought in the following verdict at the coroner's Inquest: "Deceased came to his death by coming home full and mistaking himself for his pants." 1624 First St., Cor. Morrison A rt or 8ervice. PORTLAND. OR. | A leader of a chamber music string quartet used to say that he was never sure when he approached a private N o . i s —'I S . » . N . U. house whether be would be let In with the caterer’s men at the back or with the honored guests at the front.— W H E N w rltts* to ’ ’ tloa th is pap**. New York Evening Post. The C. Gee Wo Chinese Medicine Co. FADELESS DYES tn y other dye. One 10c package colors silk, w o o l and cotton equally Color moro goods brighter and tastar c o lo n than any w a ll and la guaranteed to giva parlaci resulta. ‘ booklet b o w to aye, Irlaach and mis c o lo n . a * . •*w * ^ o s s & r z s ? } »