C
V
LEXINGTON WEEKLY BUDGET.
VOL. 2.
LEXINGTON, MORROW COUNTY, OREGON, THURSDAY, JAN. 10, 1890.
NO. 10.
PUBLISHED EVERT THURSDAY EVENING
fit
SNOW & WHITSON,
Tvrms of Subscription t
One Your, . 1.00
Bix Mouths,
90 cent.
Invariably In advance.
KATES OF ADVERTISINGS
One square (ton lines or less), first Insortlun
1.00 1 tub subsequent insertion, 60 cents.
S)ieclttl.rates with regular advertisers.
All transient advertisements must be paid for
la advance.
Job Printino
Of every description executed with neatness and
dlspatob.
F. SHIPLEY, M. D.,
PRACTITIONER Of
Medicine, Surgery &' Midwifery,
Registered.
II EITHER,
OK EllON
P. SINE,
Attorncy-at-Law and Notary public,
LEXINGTON, ORKCJON.
Attorney for the North American Attorneys
anil Tradesmen's Protective Union of Connec
ticut. J1RANK KELLOGG,
Attorney-at-Law and Notary Public,
HEI'I'NER, OREGON.
Money to loan on Improved farms. Ollice In
First National Bunk.
Q O. BOON,
Constable and Collector,
LEXINGTON, ORF.C10N.
Will attend to auctioneering.
)E3, KATE PABSELL,
Notary Public and Conveyancer,
ALPINE, OREGON.
Deeds, Morlffaptes and all others Lena! hint-nu-nts
car-fully drawn. Applications for ritate
and School lauds made, ana Pensions obtained
pRANK H. SNOW,
Land Agent and Notary public,
LEXINGTON, OREGON.
Flllnns taken on Kovornmont land. Real
estate advertised and sold on comniiSHiou. New
comers aro invited to call and be tilled lull of
solid facta about the ail-antaxes of Morrow
country. Ollice hour' '.om 7 A. M. to midnight,
BunoBT building.
R. LIEUALLEN,
GENERAL BLACKSMITH
AiuTHorseshoer,
T9 ALWAYS ON DECK AND PREPARED TO
1 do anything In his line In a neat anil work
manlike manner. Horses shod with care and
accuracy.
Shop on 0 St, Lexington, Or.
G. W. BROCK,
i to
REPAIRING DONK.
Arcade Street, Bet. C and D,
Lexington. - Oregon.
ELKHORN
NELSE MASNUSQN, Proprietor.
LEXINGTON, OR.
HORSES BOARDED BY THE
DAY OR WEEK.
Outfit Furnished for Commerelail Men
t Keaannavbla Kavtna,
A LL KINDS OF TURNOUTS AND SADDLE
Livery & Feed StaMc
Swami Jewelry.
Thero Is, says Vanit-i; Fair, a histo
ry attached to out) of tho wedding gifts
accepted by the prince of Wales on he
half of Princess Louise that is so char
acteristic of the keen interest felt by
the ueen in anything connected with
India that it deserves to lie recorded.
Southern India has long; leen known
for its Swami jewelry, but the forms
and figures of the typical Swamies are
so outrageous as frequently to offend
western notions of propriety. To
bridge over the difficulty an energetic
Parsee Framjee Boston joe Bhumgnra
determined to retino Swami carving
so that, while retaining its really dis
tinctive features, it should vie in chaste-
ness with the best efforts of tho Lou
don goldsmith. To this end he visited
Fdigland, carefully took heed of West-
end establishments, and returning to
India set to work to carry nut his ideas.
There was ono thing that Mr. Framjee
learned here m addition to ac
quiring ideas of carving, and that was
that to make anything "go" it must be
come the fashion, and that tho surest
way of becoming fashionable was to
win a royal smile of approval. Accord
ingly Air. rramiee, Having gaineu en
trance to Windsor, told his talo to the
queen, who at once caught up the idea
and appointed him her special jeweler
for Indian art jewelry. Thus power
fully encouraged Mr. Framjee returned
to his own land full of the news of tho
kindness of the empress, and raised
great enthusiasm for the person of the
sovereign among his fellow-workers.
Now comes tho pretty part of the story.
No sooner is tho intelligence of the
Princess Louise's wedding Hashed to
India than these workers in precious
metals agree to show their appreciation
of the deep obligation tliev owe the
queen, arranging that Mr. Framjee, as
their representative, should present a
niagmhcentiy carved, casket to the
happy bride. Mr. Framjee hastens to
Loudon with the casket and appeals to
the queen for guidance. Ihc queen re
members his former visit, and intimates
her desire to Marlborough house that
tho gift bo accepted, with tho result
that the casket formed one of I ho most
attractive of the many gifts that
charmed tho delighted guests of the
prince ot W ales.
The Fascination of Niagara.
"Never," said an old resident of the
village, "have I known of so many peo
ple going over the lal is as during the
past six mouths." During that time
some eight or nine persons have been
known to pass over, three of whier
have been delilx-rato suicides. It is e
source of wonder to many people living
here why persons will come from a dis
tance to Niagara apparently to connuil
suicide.
Tho press dispatch sent out frorr
Binghamton under the impression
that the last suicide was a Miss Meade,
of that place, says that tho young lady
visited this place a short time ago ami
has been "strangely fascinated with
Niagara ever since." It is a well-known
fact that scarcely any two persons havf
the same impression when first looking
upon the rapids or falls. Only a few
evenings sinco your correspondent
heard a clergyman in a neighboring
city make this remark: "I never look
upon Niagara above the falls but thai
there is a strong desire to get inlo the
water, lie down and go with it. I have
no thought of suicide, but it nlwayt
seems to mo as if it would be pleasant
to go with the water."
A lady from Rhode Island was mak
ing her lirst visit to Niagara and waf
standing on one of the Sister Island
bridges looking into the rapids under
neath. She hurriedly took the arm ol
her companion and asked to leave the
spot. Upon rcuchingthe centre of Goal
Island she sank upon a scat, seemingly
exhausted and nervous. When asked
the cause, she said: "I don't know what
came over mo, but if I had stood on
the bridge another moment nothing
could have prevented me jumping into
the rapids."
"Why," said her friend, "do you wish
to commit suicide?"
"iod forbid!" said she, "It was the
furthest thought, but there was an im
pulse which I coiiid not control, and 1
do not think I would daro live al
Niagara."
Others have experienced a similar
ensation. Buffalo Krirtss.
The Kcd Man's It. Joinder.
Around camp the Cheyenne scouts wear
ncombinalion of blanket and army uni
form. They are little fellows, and bet
ter than they look. Tho correspond
ent of an eastern newspaper who had
been out there long enough to say
"daminjun" like a native and to hold
these children of nature in sovereign
contempt, was walking through Fort
Keogh a fow days ago. A Cheyenne
wont crossed the parade grounds with
an old blanket enveloping him from
head to knees ami wellworn army
pantaloons showing below.
"Look at that daminjun,'1 said the
New Yorker to his companion. "Isn't
he the dirtiest animal that walks on
two legs?"
The Cheyenne stopped, turned, and
with the native dignily w hich the white
man has never achieved, said slowly
and distinctly in excellent English:
"Look here, young man. Jf you are
not more careful i ll report you to the
commanding officer and havejou put
in the guardhouse." Unulmm JjtUer.
She (at the pinno) "Listen! How do
you enjoy this refrain?" lie "Very
muchl The more you refrain the better
I like it" MuicU C'uurter.
Sluinlfrr Pillow.
The Ideal slumber pillow is filled with
pulverised orrn root uud way ba bought
lor W0.
MISSING LINKS.
The average age of tho twelvo En
glish bishops is 70 years.
Mrs. (icorgie Runyan edits the
Wumaii's News, of Springfield, Ohio.
Tho nightmare is going out. At least
that is tho opinion of the Bombay sur
geon general.
It is calculated that during a London
season the average amount spent in
Mowers daily is Jt'o.OOO.
Tho Woman's National Press Associa
tion intends to erect a statue to Mrs 11.
B. Hayes, in Washington.
Mr. R. 1). lilackmore, tho novelist,
now devotes more attention to his market-garden
than to his pen.
John W. Mackay, in behalf also of
Mrs. Mackay, has denied emphatically
that his wife has ever helped lioulanger.
The heat has been so intense in Foo
chow, China, that tho authorities, in the
hope of bringing rain, ordered tho kill
ing of pigs to bo stopped.
' Wagner's oury son, Siegfried, now
grown, is studying to bo an engineer,
lie looks like his father, but shows no
marked musical talent.
W. R. Shadman, of Glynn County,
Georgia, has three acres of olives. His
is believed to be the only olive grove
East of tho Rocky Mountains.
A London journal states shirts of
chain armor, which cost about 100, are
now worn by more than one distin
guished person on the continent.
M. de Freycinet has issued a com
mission to inqure into tho feasibleness
of employing swallows to carry wui
messages in lieu of carrier-pigeons.
France's production and consump
tion of milk amounts every year to 1,
8.rj0,000,000 gallons which is three
times iu excess of tho production ol
wine.
Tho International Congress of Short
hand, lately silting iu Paris, has passed
a resolution commending the intro
duction of shorthand into primary
schools.
A clever Buffalo woman who hap
been to England, traveled all around
London, seen everything worth seeing
in a two-months trip, and all it cost hci
was $200.
A Philadelphia woman who was
executed for poisoning her husband and
two children left a will bequeathing hei
estate, valued at (3,000, to the two law
yers w ho defended her.
Miss Helen Gould, daughter of Jay
Gould, is said to have always believed
she hail a mission to teach, and even
now instructs four music pupils, mem
bers of her church, at her home.
Archbishop Kenrick, of St. Louis, is
the oldest Catholic prelate in the United
States. Ho was consecrated in 1841,
and now at the age of 80, presides over
his diocese without an assistant.
Among the inscriptions in her album
most prized by Mine. Patti-Nicolini h
this, by the elder Dumas: "Being a man
and a Christian, I lovo to listen to your
singing; but if 1 were a bird 1 should
die of envy."
Observations of the stars were made
In Babylon from remote antiquity and
careful records kept of eclipses. Koine
of tho Babylonian astronomical statu
ments refer to a period earlier than 7,
000 years B. C.
The Sultan, which lately ran on some
Mediterranean rocks and sunk, has been
raised at a cost of ;(, 000. She cosl
jtMMo.OOO originally, 1' AVI, 000 more I'm
alteration and maintaiuaiicc, and will
cost Jf..i0,000 more for repairs; total.
$4,000,1X10.
There is a new Count of Monk
Cnsto. Ihe Marquis Carlo (linari, ol
Florence has bought the island and lit
title. Ho intends to construct a resi
dence there whose splendor will outdo
those of tho grottoes of the late Mr. Ed
uiond Dautes.
George W. Cable, who had such an
aversion to the theater that ho could
not be induced to visit one, is under
stood to have not only dramatized one
of his own novels, but to have placed
the work in tho hands of a Boston
manager for production.
Justice Miller, of the United States
Supreme Court, says that "of tho l.iWO
inhabitants of Block Island fully 1,000
of them have only four different family
names." This is the result of inter
marriage, but no deterioration i
noticed on that account.
Tho London Times, in discussing
General Sheridan's memoirs, remark'
that "he saw an amount of service and
experienced a number of exciting ad
ventures such as cannot, probably, be
matched by tho oldest and most ad
venturous veteran now living in any
European army."
"General" Booth in opening a new
salvation hall in Liverpool, delied uny
one to point out any authorized iloi n
of the Salvation Army not juslilied
from the Bible. They had Si,70(
societies and 8,000 olliccrs, for the most
part self-supported, and the annual in
come was not less than $1,000,000.
The old brig which carried Najioieon
from the island of Elba to France in
181S was wrecked in Monterey Bay in
1834, where she was employed as i
coastguard vessel by the Mexican gov
ernment, and she is now being fished
up by speculator for her copper. Many
relics of this historical craft have been
gold.
The N. Y. WorH building will 1
thirteen feet higher than the Time
building. Above this main structure
of stone, brick, and terra cotta w ill be
raised a dome of live stories high, and
surmounted wil h a lantern which will
1 be 300 feet altove the sidewalk. The
J editors and reporter will huvo quarter
in the dome.
Says an English verbal critic
'Americans are generally falling ink
the habit of using tho word 'allirm' foi
cnnlirm.' For instance, when an
oflioial is questioned as to tho truthful
ness of a certain rumor, the answer it
apt to be, 'I will neither allirm not
deny the report." Of course ho ought
to bay 'conlirni.'"
The Babylonian expedition of the
University of Pennsylvania, which was
sent out a year ago, has already made
successful explorations, and has secured
about three thousand tabids bearing
inscriptions more or less important.
The party of explorers will continue an
other year at their work and will bring
back all their trophies to the University
of Pennsylvania.
Maine girls are proverbially smart,
anil ono of them who is summering al
Squirrel Island, has handsomely sus
tained the record. An Augusta youii"
lady, Miss Maude Slanwood, w hile oul
yachting, accidentally fell overboard.
Tho yacht passed completely over her,
but she came up to tho surface and
coolly tried out: "Lull' her up, cap
tain, and I'll climb aboard."
A process of engraving on glass and
crystal by electricity has been communi
cated to Hie i. .'eneh Academy ol Science.
The plate to ho engraved is covered
with a concentrated solution of nitrate
of potash and put iu connection with
ono of tho poles of tho battery, and the
design is traced out with a line platinum
point connected with tho other polo.
Results of u marvelous delicacy are ob
tained. The explanation of tho queen's ap
parently inexhaustible supply of Indian
shawls, ono of which is her rcgului
wedding present, is that early in hei
majesty s reign one of tho Indian
princes, lit consideration of his havin
a largo and valuable territory ceded to
him. bound himself to pay an annual
tribute, which included IhVee pairs ol
tho linest Cashmere shawls and twelve
perlect shawl goats.
Emperor William lias but recently
honored himself with any high military
rank. Though as kaiser he is the "win
lord" of thol.erman army, he remained
but a brigadier unlil a short while ago,
when ho rose to bo a major general.
Since Queen Victoria made liini an ad
miral and tho Austrian emperor made
him a general, Mollko has urged him tr
conic up to the ursl rank, and ho uutr
Li a commanding general.
lie Proved His Cuse.
"Human nature is mighty queer,
isn t it r he observed to the other man
on the rear platform of the si rcet-car.
"Yes, I suppose so," replied the other.
"People are too scnsisivc altogether
too sensitive." "1 don't know about
that." "Well, I do. For instance,
now, you have a red nose. You are
not too blame for it, perhaps, but you
arc so sensitive that if I should oiler you
a remedy for it you " "You old
loafer, I've a good mind to knock your
head oil," hissed the red-nosed man as
he squared olf. "Told you so!" re
plied tho oilier as he dropped oil'.
"Human nature is Ihe queen-sl durned
thing on earth, and soniu folks are so
sensitive that they'd swallow their
false teeth rather than let one know
thev had 'em." Di trnil t'ri'.e I'n.is.
Genial to the Lust.
"I visited him on Sunday," says the
doctor, "and advised liini that it was -of
the utmost importance he should re
main perfectly quiet, anil, above all,
not to talk. 'Just fancy yourself a
Vegetable.' I said, 'wil bout the power
of conveying your thoughts or cum
uiunicalMig your wishes.' Mr. Cox at
this time was fully aware of his condi
tion; he could barely speak above his
breath and was extremely feeble. lie
smiled just perceptibly and drew mo
down that I might hear him the better.
'"Have you any choice, doctor, as to
the kind of vegetable you wish mo to
be?'
"I suggested that a turnip was about
as lifeless a vegetable as I knew' of anil
as little liable to nervous excitement.
"Very well,' replied Mr. Cox a tur
nip it shall be.'
"This is a good example of the man's
indomitable pluck." A. '. Turns.
A Kussbin Comparison.
A Russian gentleman who has an
American wife met some friends of the
latter who were traveling in Europe
recently, says the Boston Cimrivr, anil
among other things which lie told
them concerning her was the fact that
she had been bitten by one of the blood
hounds that had started out and run
amuck, so to say, one day upon his es
tate. The Americans were Idled with
horror and were eager in their inquir
ies in regard to what was thine and if
tlu.ro were any evil results from tho
wound. The Russian, who is of high
rank, hastened to reassure them.
"There were no bad consequences at
all," he assured them. "I took a hot
iron and burned out the wound. Jt
smelled a little like unit ton-chops cook
ing, but 1 (l Ml n I mind that.
There was perhaps no reason why
an affectionate husband should not
compare tho burning of his wife's flesh
to the cooking of a mutton-chop, and
yet so much did it olfeiid the tastes of
the people to whom he spoke that they
henceforth and forever avoided and
Will "VQ'd him.
The Kucalyptus.
California still continues to have
faith In the health-giving properties 0f
the eucalyptus. The stale board of
horticulture is just now distributing
seeds which have Ih-imi received from
Australia of a largo iiumlw-rof varieties
v ittiiKMui i vj.;.
THE CURSE OF THIRST.
Thero is in Italy a fountain over
which is the statue of a beggar drink
ing at a spring. It is called tho "Beg
gar's Fountain," and this is its story:
dnco upon a time there lived, so says
tho legend, a very proud and haughty
man, who hated the poor and set him
self above all the world who were not
as wealthy and well dressed as him
self, and his want of charily was
so great that it had become proverbial,
and a beggar would no more have
thought of asking bread at his gate
than of asking him for all his fortune.
However, there was a spring on his
land, a sweet spring of cold water, and
:ts it was the only ono for miles many
a wayfarer paused to drink at it, but
never was permitted to do so. A ser
vant, well armed, was kept upon tho
watch to drive such persons away.
Now, thero never had been known
before any ono so avaracious as to re
fuse a cup of cold water to his fellow
man, and the angels, talking amongst
each other, could not believe it; and
one of them said to the rest:
"It is impossible for any but Satan
himself P I will go to earth and prove
that it is not true."
And so this fair and holy angel dis
guised herself as a beggar-woman,
covered her golden hair with a black
hood, and chose the moment when the
master of tho house worf himself stand
ing near the spring to come slowly up
the road, walking over the stones with
bare feet, and to pause besido the foun
tain and humbly asked for a draught
of its sweet water.
Instantly the servant who guarded
tho spot interposed the pike he carried,
but tho angel, desiring to take news of
a good deed, not of an evil one, back
to heaven turned to the master him
self. "Sir," sho said, "I am, as you seo, a
wanderer from afar. Seo now poor
my garments aro, how stained with
travel. It is not surely at your bid
ding that your servant forbids mo to
drink. And oven if it is, I pray you
bid him let me alone, for I am very
thirsty."
Tho rich man looked at her with
scornful eyes and laughed contemptu
ously. "This is not ft public fountain," he
said. "You will lind one in the next
village."
"'The way Is long," pleaded the an
gel, "and I am a woman, and but
weak."
"Drive hef away," said the rich man
and, as he spoke, the beggar turned
but on tho Instant her black hood
dropped from her head ami revealed
Hoods of rippling golden hair her un
seemly rags fell to the ground -and the
shimmering robes that angels wear
shorn) in their place. For a moment
she hovered, poised on purple wings
with lua-hands folded on her bosom
and an iiiell'ablo sweetness of sorrow
in her eyes. Then, with a gush of
music and a flood of perfume, she van
ishi-il.
The servant fell to the earth like one
dead. The rich man trembled am!
cried out, for ho knew that he had
forbidden a cup of cold water to an an
gel, and horror possessed his soul.
Almost instantly, also, a terrible
thirst fell upon him which hothin
could assuage. In vain he drank wines,
sherbets, draughts of all pleasing
kinds. Nothing could slake his thirst.
Ihe sweet water of tho spring was
Salter to him than the sea. Ho who
never in his life had known an ungrat
ilied desire, now experienced Ihe tor
lure of an cvcr-unsalislicd longing; but
through this misery he began to under
stand what he had done. Ho repented
Jus cruelty to the poor. Alms were
given daily at his gale. Charity was
the business of his hie. ihe fountain
was no longer guarded, and near it
hung ever u cup ready for any ono w ho
chose to use it. Bui the cursu if curse
it were was never lifted.
The rich man young when the an
gel visiteil him -grew middle-aged
elderly, old, still tortured by this aw
ful thirst, (lespito his prayers ami re
pentance. He had given awav his sub
stance; ho had himself broken bread
for the most miserable beggars who
came to his door.
And at 80 years of ago, bowed with
infirmity and weary of Ids life, ho sat
one day besido tho fountain weeping.
And lo! along the road he saw iip-
iroaching a beggar-woman, hooded in
dack, wearing sordid rags, and walk
ing over the stones In her bare feet.
Slowly she came on and paused beside
the fountain.
"May 1 drink?" she asked.
"There are none to forbid time,"
said the old man trembling. "Drink,
poor woman. Once an angel was for
bidden here, but that lime has pussud.
Drink and pray for one athirst. Hero
is Ihe cup."
Tho woman bent over tho fountain
and Idled the cup; but instead of put
ting it to her own lips she presented it
to those of the old man.
"Drink, then," she cried, "and thirst
no more!"
.t ..I.I . 1. 1 1. ... and
4 lie oiu man ufiiii ma ,,.. ......
emptied it. Oh, blessed draught! With
it the torture of years departed, and as
he drank it h praised Heaven. Aim
lifting his eyes once more be saw the
beggar's hood drop to the ground and
her rags fall to pieces. For a moment
she stood revealed in all her beauty of
snowy skin and golden hair and silvery
raiment; and she stretched her hand
toward him, as in blessing, and then,
rising on purple pinions, vanished in
the skies. A strain of music lingered,
a perfume filled the air, and those who
came there soon after found tho old
loan praying beside the spring.
Jieiore lie died he built the fountain
! from which the spring still gushes, and
j it, with the splendid mansion bejond
it. now a hum, it
1 tb Door furevor.
The Modern Marriage.
A writer in tho Astoria (Oregon)
Tramrript, in commenting on the re
cent divorce of a young couple at The
Dalles, who were both under the age
of twenty-one years, showed conclu
sively that ho has never been thero
himself when he adapted tho following
from the peu of a well-known humor
ous writer:
"Nino-tenths of tho unhappy mar-
riages aro tho result of green human
calves being allowed to run at large
in society pastures without any yoke
on them. They marry and have chil
dren before t buy do mustaches. They
aro fathers of twins before they aro tho
proprietors of two pairs of pants, and
tho little girls they marry are old
women before they are twenty years
old. Occasionally one of these gosling
marriages turns out all right, but it is
a clear case of luck. If thero was
law against young galoots sparking;
and marrying before they have cut all
their teeth, we suppose tho little cusses
would evade it in somo way. But
there ought to be a sentiment against
it.
'It is time enough for these bantams
to think of tindiug a pullet when they
have raised money enough to buy a
bundle of lath to build a hen-house.
But they see a girl who looks cunning,
and they are afraid there aro not go
ing to be enough lo go around ami
they begin to spark real spry, and be
fore they are aware of tho sanctity of
the marriage relation lliey aro niluiicuj
for life, and before they own a cook
stove or bedstead they have got to get
up iu tho night and go after the doe.
tor, so rrightenod that they run them
selves out of breath and abuse the doc.
tor Ill-cause he docs not run too. Ain
when the doctor gets there, there is not.
linen enough iu the house to wrap up
the -baby."'
THE STRAWS0NIZER.
A Novel Agricultural Implement at the
1-urls Kxpoaltlon.
Perhaps no single implement at tho
Paris exposition is nltraeting so much
attention as tin; Strnwsonizcr, says the
American AiriaiUurist. In shape it
appears something like a two-wheeled
cart, with some apparatus near the
axle and a hopper above. It is an
automatic distributor, and will dis
tribute in a minute spray either liouid
or powdered fertilizers and insecticides
in the form of a dry powder. 1 he claim
is made that it will also broadcast all
kind of line grain in any quantity and
with absolute evenness. The broad
casting of seeds, insecticides, fertiliz
ers., can be done at the rate Irom four
to eight acres per hour. It distributes
these various articles in the form of a
spray, spreading them more evenly iu
a subdivided condition than was ever
before attained. This can bo inferred
from the fact that tho Slrawsonizi-r
will distribute as small a quantity as
lift y pounds of nitrate of soda per acre
with great evenness, or ono gallon of
petroleum can be sprayed like line
dew over an acre. With the proper
attachments tho sprays can be thrown
over the trees, hop-vines, grapevines,
etc., and will doubtless come into gen
eral use for applying paris green and
other insecticides to orchards, vine
yards, and potatoes, and all other
crops, for distributing small quanti
ties of liquid poisons or offensive mat
ter it is especially valuable. The ma
chine is worked with one horse and a
boy to drive. The practicability of the
machine seems to have been thorough
ly demonstrated by repeated tests last
year, and this season several Slraw
sonizers are at work in England and
France. It is probable that the Straw
soiiizer will be ou the American mar
ket in 18!H.
It Whs On WhnoW. .
Undoubtedly the biggest fool seen In
New York for a long time was a man
down from New Hampshire, who was
looking for li)5 Broadway, the Western
Union Building. Ho had been told of
the wonderful things to bo seen there,
including tho telegraph wires and Jay
iioi.m. no nan "r.w written on a
card and was walking around the
street looking for a corresponding
number. Catching sight of a llroail
way ear with the number VJi painted
conspiciously on the side, he exclaimed;
"II gosh, the thing's on wheels!" and,
with a look of superior wisdom and de
light on his face, piled on board.
Ho shiillled cautiously inside, and,
taking a seat, said to a man beside him:
"Wall, I'm a guinea if this don't take
the cake. The folks up in New Jlanii
shire won't believe it when 1 go home
an' tell 'em 'bout this. Curious? Wall,
I should say!"
Tho ringing of the register bull
interested It till.
'Mutt's all done by 'b-ctricity, I'll bet
a dollar. Better not git too close to it,
1 reckon," and ho slid away. "All
you folks in here to sire the elephant,
loo? Wall, it's a corker, an' make no
mistake."
The conductor came around for the
fare.
"Didn't know there Wilis anything to
pay."
"live cents," said the conductor.
As country wont down into his pocket
he said:
"I've heerd of you afore, Jay, but I
1'idn't know you would tackle a feller
fcr live cents. But hero qics. I'm in
Uown to see the sights, an' I'm goin' to
play her for all she's wurth. " Ar.
Hurld.
"I suppose your ollice has a poet's
corner?'' a.ikeil the pale, young man.
"No, sir," replied the businuas man
ager; "there is no poet's corner, and
never will bo. It is impossible to cor
ner an article the natural supply of
which is so much in excess of tiio de
uiuud." Ttrrt llauta tixjirau. ,
- iluraea as in aapuaiu oi pa..