hospitals distinctly, m a ’am, and I can upon visitors to his house th e g reat In a certain home m issionary m ove­ not rem em ber where each passenger ex ten t of his riches. ment every p a rtic ip a n t was to con w ants to get o f f .” He was show ing a cajler from the trib u te $1 th a t she had earned herself ‘ ‘ Don t be im p e rtin e n t S top the E ast through his p alatial mansion on Y outhful C ritic. by hard work. The n ig h t of th e col­ c a r.” one occasion when they stopped be­ IT T L E Wendell Holmes Emerson lection o f tho dollars came and v a ri­ The conductor did so and as her fore a handsom e plate glass m irror, of o f Boston was restin g sedately * ous and droll were earn foot le ft the step, she turned and said: — .............n a s r e s t in g s e d a t e ly — n n r the m e s stories t o r ie s o of i earn- massive size, above the fireplace in W ith h i s h n n k in vU w ith his book in th e »>•» park shortly 1 | I ,nS ,ho money. One woman had sham I suppose I will have to walk two or the draw ing room. a fte r a picnic dinner. He had eaten I ■*oood h a ir, an o th er had made dough three blocks n o w .” “ See th a t m irro r? ” asked the p a c k ­ newspajier too much. He knew p erfectly well he nu^8, another had secured -------- ncwspajH- ‘ es, ma am, in the sam e direction er, “ it cost me ju s t ten thousand dol­ had eaten too much and he was very subscriptions, and so on. as we are going. We h a v e n ’t reached la r s ,” much surprised and shocked at himself. The chairm an tu rn ed to a handsome H arper H ospital v e t.’’ “ H e a v e n s!” o^^aaaaaaas. exclaim ed aa the S-w visitor, H e prayed ferv en tly th a t no one would woman in the fro n t row. Ju ly impressed. Then, a fte r a careful notice his condition. “ Now, madam, it is your tu r n ,” he N ot the B ank. (exam ination of the article, he added: J u s t then a kindly old lady appeared said. “ How did you earn vour dol­ efrs. B arrow s was w orried— th a t fa c t “ B ut w hat a p ity it is scratched la r » ” and sat down beside him “ Ah ’’ was evident to her husband, although “ y es ,” said the pack er carelessly th o u g h t Wendell, “ I have sadly “ I got it from my h u sb an d ,” she she endeavored to m aintain a cheerful Then, tu rn in g to his w ife, he said answ ered. ju red h er esthetic sen sib ilities.’ ’ L „ ° Der' , ? th ® evenln8 was over, «< M ary, perhaps y o u ’d b e tte r not le t B y th is tim e th e kind old lady “ O h ! " said he. “ From your hus­ t i e r , ie iscovered th e cause of |tb e children have any more diam onds w as firm ly settled. “ My little b o y ,’ band» 1 hero was no h ard work about her anxiety. . , ... -- 7 ................. _ Ito play w ith. th a t .” said she, “ are you over e ig h t» ’’ Will, said she. “ I am very much I t was w onderful to see how the The woman smiled fa in tlv afraid th a t my bank is in a bad w a y .” young Mr. Emerson recovered his dig “ You d o n ’t know m y h u sb an d ,” How foolish, Mabel! D o n ’t let th at nity . T h at a woman w ith such o u t­ she said. causo you a m om ent's worry. Why, landish gram m ar should dare to c riti­ it s one of the strongest financial in ­ cise him was unbelievable. “ No, ma stitu tio n s in the state. W hatever got Beginning Early. dam, said he, proudly. “ I have th a t idea into your head » ” overeaten! ’ ’ “ F a th e r ,” inquired th e little brain “ Well, i t 's very s tra n g e ,” replied tw ister o f the fam ily, “ when will our Mrs. Barrows, still unconvinced. “ They little baby brother be ab le to ta lk » ” have ju st retu rn ed a check of mine for Like a Philosopher. “ Oh, when h e ’s about three, E th e l.” $40 m arked ‘ No F u n d s!’ ” “ John, J o h n ,’ ’ exclaimed little Mrs. ‘ Why c a n ’t he ta lk now, fa th e r» ” Big Values Jones, as she rusned into her hus­ ‘He is only a baby y et, E thel. Milk by the Yard b a n d ’s lib ra ry in a state o f g re a t a g i­ B abies c a n ’t ta lk .” in Used Cars W iggins is a confirm ed practical i ta tio n and excitem ent, ‘ w hat do you “ Oh, yes, th ey can, f a th e r ,” in s is t­ joker. The other day he strolled into th in k the cook has done»’ ’ * ‘ A used ear bought from the ed E thel, ‘‘ for Jo b could talk when W inton Company ia worth 30 tho local dairy, and, w ith a perfectly “ C a n ’t im ag in e,’ ’ came the reply. be was a b a b y .” per cent more than its duplicate solemn face, said: “ F o rg o tten to break som ething—e h » ” “ Jo b ! W hat do you m ean » ” anyw here e lse .” We hear thia “ I w ant a y a rd of m ilk !” Mrs. Jones w rung her hands. atatem ent every day. The rea- “ Y es,” said E thel. “ N urse was The dairym an was not to be done. 1, aon ie plain when it is rem em­ Oh, Johu, do be s e rio u sl’’ she tellin g us today th a t it says in th e bered that no traded in car ia begged. “ Cook actu ally poured petrol B ible: ‘Jo b cursed the day he was D ipping his fin g er into th e milk, he j offered here for sale until it has drew a line of wet m ilk along the on the kitchen fire so m ake it burn b o rn .’ ” been thoroughly overhauled in counter, and said blandly: upl ” our own shops by W inton ex ­ perts and brought up to the “ There you are, sir. Ten cents a “ P etrol 1 Petrol! A nd d id n ’t it ex ­ Fully Qualified. W inton standard of autom obile y ard. ’ ’ p lo d e!” excellence. Some tim e since th ere was an exami B ut W iggins got one back, a fte r all. I “ Yea— I should th in k it did! I t n ation in a medical college, when one I f yon can apprertate what “ Ah, th a n k s ! " he said negligently, nearly blew th e silly woman throngh Ibis enhanced value m eans you of th e professors tu rn ed to a stu J u s t roll it up fo r me, will you»” the w in d o w !” w ill send NOW for our com­ dent “ Oh, w e ll,’ ’ mused the husband, “ it plete list of high grade " u s e d ” “ A nd n o w ,” said the professor, “ if Johnny’s iieason. car bargaiua. w ouidn’t really have m attered if it a person in good health, b u t who im had blown her q u ite through, would The lesson was in m ultiplication, and It goes w ithout saying that a agined him self sick, should send fo r i t I This is her aftern o o n out anyw ay re built car of high grade manu­ th e teacher sought to im press upon li t­ you, w hat would you d o » ” facture which has been operated 1 believe. ” “ I would give him som ething to tle Jo hnny th a t th ree tim es two and snly 10 per cent of its real mile­ age, Lust can be purchased at 50 make him sic k ,” w as tho prom pt r e ­ tw o tim es three am ounted to the same Lunch Counter Refinement. tiling. per cent of the original pri-a jo in d er o f the stu d en t, “ and then w ill prove far more satisfactory N ow ,” said she, “ if y 0U conld The young man who eats all 'round adm in ister an a n tid o te .” and much teas expensive than th e circuit ran ag ain st this quick luncl a cheap car bought uew. Don t w aste any more tim e here, have two bags w ith three oranges in each or three bags with tw o oranges incident recently: my b o y ,” proudly exclaim ed th e p ro ­ V ery little money w ill NOW A fastidious person made his way fessor, ‘ ‘ b u t begin practice a t once.” in each, w hich would you choose»” buy one of th ese rebuilt cars “ The three bags with tw o oranges charily into the place. A tum bler of that w ill give the beet satisfac­ in each, replied Johnny w ithout hesi tion in both service and appear­ m urky w ater was thum ped before him In Five Days. ance. Send today for our latest ta tio n ; “ then I ’d have one more baa by the young woman on the o th er side One of th e bosses a t B ald w in ’s loco­ to bust. ’ ’ com plete bargain list. of the counter. m otive w orks had to lay o ff an arg u ­ “ W h a t's jo u r s » ” —THE— m e n ta tiv e 'Iris h m a n nam ed P a t, so he l “ Coffee and rolls, my g ir l.” In Kansas City. WINTON MOTOR CAB CO. saved discussion by p u ttin g the d is­ One of those iron heavy, q u arter charge in w riting. The n ex t day P a t Portland, Oregon. In K ansas C ity th ey love to tell of inch thick mugs of coffee was pushed was missing, but a week la te r the boss Spokane. Wash. Seattle, Wash. a certain w ealth y m eat packer, who over the counter. . The fastidious p er­ was passing through the shop and he never loses an opportunity to impress son seemed dazed. H e looked under saw him again a t his lathe. Going up th e mug and over it. to the Irishm an, he dem anded, fierce­ “ B ut w here is th e sau cer» ” he in ly: quired. “ D id n ’t you g et my le tte r » ” “ Wo d o n ’t give no saucers here. I f “ Yis, sur, Oi d id .” said P a t. we did some low b ro w ’d come pilin “ Did you read i t » ” in a n ’ d rink out o f his saucer, an “ Sure, sur, Oi read it inside and w e ’d lote a lo t of our sw ellest tr a d e .” Oi read it tu ts id e ,” said P a t, “ and on th e inside yez said I was fired, and andWinform ation0 io°r $3 00» ' w V ’ hav’L’’? For Sake of Another. on th e outside yez said, ‘ R eturn to steads in W e s t e r n C a n . d . .h i ? * ■»'»ted several hundred on home Tho case had been long protracted, B ald w in ’s locom otive w orks in fiv e insfie.dDOi; T f ° r 1OCat'° n r system! days. ’ ’ ’ and w as going none too well for the d efendant. H is counsel, therefore, had vou ? n d y ° U COme t 0 ,?Ur ° ff,ce and personally tak e charge Three i«3 00i ^ n . 7 OU’« 7 e uW' g' Ve you the inform ation bv mail for A Successful Remedy. recourse to bullying methods. One o f the p la i n ti f f ’s witnesses, a Two men were ta lk in g o f th e hard notorious old jailb ird , had ju st le ft the times. box, his place being tak en by an old “ Does yonr w ife ever grieve I . plasterer. cause she th rew over a w ealthy man “ H ave you ever te e n in p riso n » ” in order to m arry y o u » ” queried Hall. asked th e b arrister. “ Well, she started to once,” was “ Yes, s i r ,” replied the w itness, the reply, “ b n t I cured her o f it w ith ­ raising c a ttle, or on the best mixed f a c i n g la n d , in W estern “ twiee. ” out d e la y .” Any one of thee« claims is worth a life tim e of aaving to 7 o u WHI “ Ahi And fo r how long, may “ I wish yon would tell me how ” give you inform ation regarding maps nlatu pt*. w .d name and ad.lrea. of a fe iia b .f . T n T g u f t . i n ‘t h . r i e i n i t V ’w h ^ 0 ’ ask » ” said Hall. “ F irst tim e fo r an atternoon. Tee “ I sta rte d rig h t in y riev in g w ith w ant to go th a t will put you on the land. Will give you fuU i n f o r i l " ond tim e for about an hour. You see, h e r,” replied the other, “ and 1 grieved t.o n regarding t h . location of the railroad, how fa r it has been b T lt s i r , " continued th e w itness, tak in g h ard er and longer th a n she d id .” w here it is in operation, ete., e tc , and how to s e t veur ? rates and tiek eta; and all inform ation concerning’ priee t e r a a . n T i " * ad v an ta g e of the b a r r is te r ’s confusion, rent on all Hudson Bay L an d , in Weateru c i J d ^ T h i^ ri. “ I was sen t to prison to w hitew ash Did as He Was Told. which rem it us by P. O. money order and we will give v o t. t h . i l f a cell fo r a law yer who had been rob A woman hustled th e len g th of a tion to get a Homestead th a t will make you m d e^ en d en t bing his c lie n ts .” W oodward avenue ear and confronted HO M ESTEADS In Sunny Alberta, Western Canada is s S s S s g S s s Followed Instruction*. She was a little girl and very polite. I t was th e firs t tu n e she had been on a v isit alone, and she had been care fu lly in stru cted how to behave. “ I f th ey ask you to dine w ith th e m ,” papa had said, “ you m ust say ‘ No, th an k you, have already the conductor: “ D id n ’t I tell you to le t me o ff a t H arper H o sp ita l» ” “ I am calling all th e stre e ts and I t tu rn ed out ju s t te a ” CO C lip th is Coupon and m a ll to tha n - O t n „ (o r fu ll In fo rm a tio n .— lie * o b lig a tio n laotirreA . Name: A M raM l--------------’ ---------------------------- s papa had a n ­ “ Come along, M arjo rie.” said her little frie n d 's fa th e r “ yon must have a b ite w ith us.” “ No, th an k y o u ," said the little girl w ith d ig n ity ; “ I have already bit HOM ESTEAD 73 SIXTH STREET, PORTLAND. OREOON. P h o n e M ain IT H LIFE H EA LTH ACCIDENT dined. ’ ” ticipated. C A N A D IA N ” - ---- *WO a 0 • M M M Ooeupatlom n \ tplktk V7 iV l A poi B I N • * X J , j T I O V 7 on T R A C T • • • • • • * • • MY CM M M ^A g. O .a rw t b irth d a y .............. . . . . In a ■ raneo Suggested N SURANCE CO. HOME OFFICE—SEATTLE, U. 8. • m A. • M a W« M * <