Heppner Gazette-Times, Heppner, Oregon Wednesday, September 20, 2023 -- THREE
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Toe safety
To the editor:
It appears there is a new
health risk on the horizon
and our Federal Govern-
ment is promptly taking
control of the situation
by initiating a new health
emergency. With the recom-
mendation of the CDC and
many top scientists, a steel-
toed boot mandate will be
in place very soon. This is
due to the latest increase
in “toe trauma”. The inci-
dence of stubbed toes has
increased dramatically over
the past several months,
leading to a dangerously
high and deadly risk of in-
grown toenails. The White
House has denied any link
between the new toe risk
and the “Chinese Phalange
Jam Lab” and has dismissed
the rumor as a Right-Wing
conspiracy theory.
During a recent press
conference concerning
the new mandate, White
House Press Secretary Kar-
ine Jean-Pierre stated that
the Biden administration
is working tirelessly on
an anti-toe stubbing vac-
cine, and she is confident
the vaccine would be safe
and effective, not only as
a preventative measure,
saving many toes from
likely amputation, it would
also re-grow toes that have
previously suffered ampu-
tation. The Secretary added
“President Biden will, of
course, be receiving the
vaccine, especially after the
toe vs. stairs incident. As I
have stated multiple times,
this unfortunate incident
has absolutely nothing to
do with his age, especially
since our President is barely
40 under the new Age Re-
assignment Act”.
When asked about
those who can’t afford the
required boots, she respond-
ed by saying the Biden Ad-
ministration Anti-Inflation
Act would provide more
than enough funds to sup-
plement those who cannot
afford them, with special
consideration for People
of Color, and immigrants,
adding that Vice President
Harris will soon be taking a
trip to our southern border
for mass boot distribution.
The Speaker put to rest
any fear of boot shortages
by assuring that President
Biden has been speaking
with President Xi Jinping
and has agreed to purchase
several billion boots from
the Chinese boot factory
“Boots Are Us”. It was also
pointed out that the rumors
of Hunter Biden, Bill Gates,
and Dr. Toni Fauci heavily
investing in the Chinese
boot company are totally
unfounded.
“We have been ham-
mering out the details of this
new safety measure, which,
of course, will include quar-
antine for those refusing to
wear the mandated boots.
This quarantine would be
for their own protection,
and for the protection of all
law-abiding citizens. Those
caught wearing sandals
outdoors would, of course,
face jail time. She then
ended the conference with
the familiar White House
elevator music and the com-
forting advice “Let’s all
keep Grandma safe”.
In other news, Califor-
nia Governor Gavin New-
som has reportedly gone a
step further in the area of
public safety by requiring
the wearing of special hel-
mets by all Californians.
These mandated helmets
are the result of an import-
ant scientific breakthrough
using the latest “anti-truth”
technology. These truth-re-
sistant helmets would be
required to be worn while
attending church services,
Trump rallies, or watching
Conservative Talk shows.
While the exception of
watching Fox News with-
out a helmet is still unclear,
anything with Tucker Carl-
son carries a definite double
helmet requirement.
“When the righteous
thrive, the people rejoice;
when the wicked rule, the
people groan.” Proverbs
29:2
Susie Crosby
Prineville, OR
Outdoor worship
planned at Hopeful
Saints
Everyone is invited to
join Hopeful Saints Min-
istry, 460 Gale St. in Hep-
pner, at 10 a.m. Sunday,
September 24, for their
annual outdoor worship.”
Immediately following
worship, we will have a
barbecue potluck and some
fun family yard games,”
said a spokesperson.
“Please bring
something to barbecue and
a side dish or dessert to
share. Cold drinks and all
utensils will be provided.
Chairs will also be provided
but you may bring your own
lawn chair if you prefer.
Bring the whole family or
a friend. All are welcome,”
said a spokesperson.
William and Neva Mahon recently returned from
what was supposed to be a dream vacation - traveling
through the Canadian Rockies on a luxury train with
gourmet meals en route. The trip had been booked in
January, but by the date of their departure, Canada was
ablaze with forest fires. They did get to enjoy a day in
Vancouver before embarking on the train. They enjoyed
only a half-day train ride before the train came to a stop
in the middle of nowhere. The fire had jumped the tracks
ahead. It took a while for buses to arrive to evacuate pas-
sengers, who were kept content with an early-day happy
hour. Each passenger was issued a mask before exiting
the train. Ash was floating through the air as the transition
was made from train cars to buses. The major highway
was also closed, which meant buses had to take back roads
to get to safety. The entire trip continued by bus, taking
them to scheduled stops at Banff and Calgary, which were
both out of the fire zone. They did get to have lunch at
the fabulous hotel at Lake Louise, which was followed
by a bus ride further up the mountain to a place the bus
driver said we could hike the short trail to the top of the
mountain for a spectacular view. Was he kidding? This
was a bus of senior citizens, most of whom (including
William and Neva) decided to take his word for it and
explore the gift shop instead. So, the trip was not at all
as planned, but they had nice traveling companions and
new friendships were made.
Diana Ball returned last Friday from a week’s trip
to the Oregon Coast with the Montana Moyers – HHS
graduates Bruce and Diane, daughter Randi, and friend
Chip Magnuson. “The weather was perfect!” The travelers
all agreed. And travel they did, staying in Lincoln City
but visiting many sights along Highway 101. They were
happy to spot some whales, “one up close,” and satisfied
their cravings for fresh seafood. Another great trip with
friends!
Recently, four Keithley siblings had another oppor-
tunity to gather for walks down memory lane and catch-
ups on one another’s current activities. Lavern Keithley
recently traded life in Heppner for stays in Arizona, Long
View, WA, and Milton-Freewater. Janet Keithley Kloep-
pel has lived in Vernal, AZ, for several years but makes a
point of visiting our area every summer. Sharon Keithley
Harrison and Trish Keithley Sweeney live in Lexington
and Heppner, respectively. These children of Everett and
Helen Keithley, born in Heppner, now in their 70’s and
80’s, appreciate these important yearly times together.
Last weekend, the Heppner Elks Lodge hosted the
Oregon State President of the organization and many
dignitaries from the East District and from Idaho for an
“official visitation.” Part of the weekend’s agenda was
a performance in the cemetery of an excerpt from the
“Days of Sorrow” drama that was first staged in 2003 to
commemorate the 1903 Flood. The decision to present
this play was based on the wealth of information it offers,
through the characters, of Heppner’s amazing tragedy and
rebuilding, part of our history unknown to many visitors.
Commission prohibits
coyote killing contests
The Fish and Wildlife
Commission voted five in
agreement to one abstention
to prohibit contests for the
taking of coyotes and other
unprotected mammals today
after hearing testimony from
more than 40 people at their
meeting in Bend.
The rules adopted
today are in line with the com-
mission’s regulatory authority.
They establish a definition for
contests and make it unlawful
to organize, sponsor, conduct,
or participate in a contest that
has the objective of killing
unprotected mammals native
to Oregon.
The Commission has
the authority to regulate the
take of unprotected mammals.
But state statutes adopted by
the Oregon State Legislature
classify coyotes and some
other unprotected mammals as
predatory animals when they
are causing agricultural dam-
age on private land. (Predatory
animals are defined in statute
and do not include carnivores
like bears, cougars and wolves
which are classified as game
mammals.)
Under state statute,
MONDAY 5:00 P.M.
Willow Creek Terrace
Invites you to join in our
Fall Yard Sale!
September 23 from 9am to 1pm
House hold items, clothes,
furniture, puzzles, baked goods
and much much more!
Absolutely no early birds!
400 Frank Gilliam Drive
Heppner, Oregon
Lunch
& Dinner
Menu
“How Bad Is Inflation?” was the topic from Dennis
O’Donnell (HHS, now Madras) this week, and here are a
few examples: “A picture is now only worth 200 words.
Called to get Blue Book Value on my car. They asked
if gas tank was full or empty. McDonald’s is selling the
1/4 ouncer.”
Reading about what has brought smiles to others’
faces must surely bring a smile to the reader, so please
think about spreading your smile by sending your item
to dbrosnan123@gmail.com or call 541-223-1490. That
is all it takes to add your good news!
Hope good news comes to everyone reading this
column.
WCCC Ladies Play Day
Virginia Grant took low
gross of the field at the Sep-
tember 19 Willow Creek
Country Club Ladies Play
Day with three players par-
ticipating.
Pat Dougherty was low
net of the field and Jackie
Allstott had least puts of the
field. Allstott also took the
long drive.
The fall meeting and play
day will be held on September
26 with a 9 a.m. meeting and
play to follow. Lunch will be
served and awards presented
afterword.
Specials 9/21-9/27
Thursday - hot roast beef slider with Mac n
cheese $9
Friday - Captains Seafood platter & coleslaw
$11
Saturday - chicken taco salad $10
Monday - Orange chicken, fried rice, egg roll
$9
Tuesday - chicken fry steak, hash browns, and
scrambled eggs $9
Tuesday night - $2 hard shell tacos 6-9pm
Wednesday - spaghetti and garlic bread $9, $7
for seniors
Donate Your Car
Imagine the Diff erence You Can Make
DEADLINE:
MONDAYS
AT 5PM
FOR SALE
Freestone Canning
Peaches - O'Henry &
Monroe
2nd/3rd Tie Dallas Harsin-
Scott Dougherty, 71
Gross:1st David Allstott
,76, 2nd Duane Disque, 77, 3rd
Charlie Ferguson, 78
On Saturday, Sept. 23, the
Elks will be holding their eye
clinic fundraiser tournament.
For more information, contact
Marty Brannon.
U-Pick
Bartlett & Asian Pears Call
for Pricing
Ready Pick
Freestone canning peaches
$25.00 a box
Ready Pick
Necatarines $26.00 a box
CHECK US OUT ON
FACEBOOK FOR
UPDATES
541-934-2870
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THOMAS
ORCHARDS
U-Pick
the Fish and Wildlife Com-
mission does not have the
authority to regulate the take
of predatory animals. Statutes
state “the Commission shall
not prescribe limitations on
the times, places or amounts
for the taking of predatory
animal” (ORS 496.162) and
“nothing in the wildlife laws
is intended to deny the right
of any person to control preda-
tory animals” (ORS 610.060).
Another statute, ORS 610.105,
also recognizes that landown-
ers or their agents can control
predatory animals on their
property.
While acknowledg-
ing that the commission does
not have the regulatory au-
thority to prohibit contests
in all situations, Chair Wahl
described the new rules as “a
step we can take that is within
our authority.”
The commission first
considered prohibiting these
contests back in December
2022, when they denied a pe-
tition while directing ODFW
staff to develop rules to stop
coyote killing contests in a
way that is consistent with
their regulatory authority.
ALL NEWS AND ADVERTISEMENT DEADLINE:
&
✔ a 2-night, 3-day hotel stay
at one of 50 locations
Call 1-844-533-9173
Help Prevent Blindness
Get A Vision Screening Annually
Kimberly, Oregon
WCCC Sunday
Men’s Play
Eighteen men participat-
ed in the annual cross-country
tournament at Willow Creek
Country Club on Sunday,
September 17. This final event
of the year for the men’s club
was played on a par 69 special
course setup. The results are
as follows:
Net:1st Gary Watkins, 69;
Good News Only by Doris Brosnan
Equipment Purchases • Operating Lines
Committed to
AG Lending
See AMBER and SHANE for
Equipment
and Farmland
AMBER SCHLAICH
270 N. Main Street
Heppner
(541) 676-9125
Ag/Commercial Loan Officer
Purchases
SHANE LAZINKA
280 Main Street
Ione
(541) 422-7466
Ag/Commercial Loan Officer
SPECIALIZING IN AGRICULTURAL & COMMERCIAL LOANS
MEMBER FDIC