PA G E- 6 2005 Welcome Hunters!
Hunting jokes
Morrow
County
Museum
and
Agricultural
Collection
Two hunters were dragging their dead
deer back to their car. Another hunter
approached pulling his along too.
“Hey, I don’t want to tell you how to
do something ... but I can tell you that it’s
much easier if you drag the deer in the
other direction. Then the antlers won’t dig
into the ground.”
After the third hunter left, the two
decided to try it. A little while later one
hunter said to the other, “You know, that
guy was right. This is a lot easier!”
“Yeah, but we’re getting farther from
the truck,” the other added.
M USEUM : 444 North Main Street, Heppner
Museum - Open Tues-Fri 1-5 , and Sat 11-3
AG EXHIBIT: 152 North Main Street, Heppner
Ag Exhibit - Open Fri 1-5, and Sat 11:30-3
MUSEUM CLOSED FOR THE SEASON Oct. 1-Feb.l
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©Morrow b o u n ty ©Museum
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Heppner Fun for +he Whole Family" 2005
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G o o d For O ne Free Pass
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Tuesday through Friday, 1-5 / Saturday 11-3
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Good until Oct. 1, 2005 I
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ARTISAN VILLAGE
Main Street, Heppner • 676-8282
UXTLT
C l L_)
m
Quilting Fabrics: 4 0 0 0 + bolts
Handmade Baskets and Supplies
and Much More!
a n
mJcfl
Open: Sunday 12-5 • Mon-TUes-Wed 9:30-5:30
Thurs 9:30-7:30 • Fri 9:30-5:30 • Closed Saturday
November - February seasonal hours:
Same as above except: Fri 9:30-4
W illow C reek V alley
E conomic D evelopment G roup
Helping Start or Move Businesses
to Heppner, lone and Lexington
WILLOW CREEK VALLEY ECONOMIC DEVELOPMENT GROUP
(541) 676-9228 • 1-800-326-2152 (Ask for David Sykes)
P.0. Box 337 / Heppner. Oregon 97836 w w w .h e p p n e r.n e t
The deer hunter and the scotch
Two men go deer hunting. They settle
down in their stand and start waiting for
the deer. This gets rapidly boring for one
of them so he reaches into his backpack
and withdraws a bottle of 100 proof
scotch.
“Want som e?” he asks his deer
hunting partner.
“ No, I ’ve got to concentrate on
watching for deer.”
“Okay...” he says and happily drains
the bottle.
They go back to watching for deer.
Again, the man gets bored and gets from
his backpack another bottle of scotch.
“Want some,” he asks again.
The Umatilla National Forest Includes
a wide variety of coniferous forests of
ponderosa, lodgepole, and western white
pines; grand, subalpine, and Douglas firs;
as well as Engelmann spruce and western
larch. The Forest encompasses about
1.4 million acres ranging in elevation from
about 1,900 feet to over 7,000 feet.
Interstate 84 roughly divides the
Umatilla National Forest into two distinct
areas. The north half Is generally wetter
with deep incised valleys and is
comprised of the moist-forest tree types
such as grand and subalpine firs. The
southern half of the Forest is generally
dryer with flat to rolling topography and
supports extensive stands of lodgepole
pine and park like groves of ponderosa
pines. Lower elevations across the
Forest primarily consist of ponderosa
pines, while mid-elevation habitats
Include mixed stands of grand fir,
Douglas-fir, lodgepole pine and western
larch trees. Above 5,000 feet there are
stands of subalpine fir and Engelmann
spruce.
Western white pines are usually
scattered among other trees instead of
occurring in pure stands, although an
introduced disease, white pine blister
rust, has seriously reduced Its numbers.
Western Juniper occupies the driest and
hottest forest environments in eastern
Oregon, often occurring In a zone
between low elevation sagebrush and
ponderosa pine. Western Juniper has
expanded greatly In the last 50 years and
is expected to become the most common
forest type In Oregon. Pacific yew Is
generally found In the understory on
moist coot sites.
In autumn, western larch or tamarack
trees provide most of the fa« ooior In the
Blue Mountains since deciduous hardwood
species such as quaking aspen and black
cottonwood are relatively uncommon in this
area. The fa« color of western larch trees
varies year to year from lemon yellow to a
tawny, russet color.
“No, thanks,” is his reply.
“Your loss,” he says and happily
drains the bottle.
He’s pretty sloshed by now, but goes
back to help his friend watch for deer. A
minute later, a single deer walks up to their
stand.
“Bang!!!” goes his partners rifle.
“Missed it,” his partner says.
The sloshed hunter waves his rifle in
the general direction of the fleeing deer.
“Bang!!!” his rifle goes. He kills the deer
straight out.
“Wow,” his partner said, “how did you
do that?”
“Well,” he replied, “when there’s a
whole herd of deer, you can hardly miss,
can you?”
A deer hunter from the city
A deer hunter from the city bagged a
big buck. Just about that time, the game
warden arrived and asked the hunter if he
had a hunting license and deer tag. The
hunter said he didn’t have a license or a
tag, so the game warden had to take the
hunter and the deer to town.
The game warden helped the hunter
drag the 200 plus pound deer out to the
road. Not that the hard work was done,
the hunter exclaimed, “I just remembered,
I do have a hunting license and deer tag
after all.”
Umatilla National Forest
Supervisor's Office
2517 S W Hailey Avenue
Pendleton, Oregon 97801
(541)278-3716
Heppner Ranger District
Pomeroy Ranger District
117 South Main Street
71 West Main Street
Heppner. Oregon 97836
Pomeroy W A 99347
(541)676-9187
(509) 843-1891
North Forlt John Day Ranger
District
Highway 244
Walla Walla Ranger District
Ukiah Oregon 97880
(509)522-6290
1415 West Rose Street
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