Page 2 Heppner, Ore., Gazette-Times, Thurs., Dec. 13, 1973
Horse sense
By
KRNF.ST V. JOIXKR
ST
Attorney Bob Abrams and I were discussing the energy
crisis (as who isn't). I declared that if independent oil
producers were turned loose without the mass of government-imposed
regulations, environmental impact studies
and a hundred other restrictive measures, the nation's
energy problems would be resolved quickly. Which reminded
Bob of a story, which goes like this: One day the Lord
summoned Moses and said, "Moses, I have some good news
and some bad news. I'll give you the good news first. You will
go into the land of Egypt and free your people from bondage.
You will lead the Israelites from the land, and when you get
to the Red Sea I will command the waters to part, giving you
and your people safe passage through. Then I will cause the
waters to close behind you, destroying the Pharaoh and his
pursuing army." Moses was delighted, and asked, "But
what "s the bad news?" "The bad news," the Lord replied, "is
that you have to file an environmental impact study!"
The common council has indicated a desire to raise the
water rates for users outside the city limits, who now pay the
regular meter rate plus $1 per month. The proposed increase
is one and one-half the city rate, which may be very low in
view of the fact that city residents have just voted $450,000 in
bonds to improve the water system. Users outside the city
won't share in the property tax necessary to pay off these
bonds. The only way for outside users to share in the cost of
the new water system is for them to pay higher water rates to
compensate for not having to pay property taxes to retire the
bonds. To the Gazette-Times, it seems that the proposed one
and one-half rate is extremely low considering what it is
going to cost the city user. The council would do well to
consider something in the neighborhood of three times the
city rate, at least during the years city users will be saddled
with higher property taxes due to the water crisis. But one
and one-half the rate is, I think, discriminatory in that
despite the higher rate, outside users will be getting water at
an overall cheaper rate than city users. Had the water bonds
been defeated, and the city gone to revenue bonds to pay for
the system, it was estimated by the city engineer that the
cost of water to users would have to double, or more.
Consequently, any rate to outside users less than double the
present rate would, in fact, be giving them a lower rate than
city users will enjoy.
Paul Harvey, news commentator, said the other day that
if we were to keep buying oil from the Arabs at the rate we
have been for the next seven years (if there were no boycott),
the Arabs nations would have a total of $300 billion of our
money-enough to buy control of the United States if they
pressed for immediate payment. These, dollars, he said,
could buy up all the shares listed on the American Stock
vi Exchange-six times over! The Arabs, by cutting off our oil
supply, may have done us a great service-by saving the
country! They may have done us another favor by making us
realize how foolish we are to become dependent upon any
foreign commodity, especially oil. The example also points
up the fact that while we were basking in the reflected
s warmth of Arab oil we should have been increasing our own
domestic explorations for oil and developing new power
sources. I hate to be in the debt of a bunch of international
brigands like the Arabs, but I am. Maybe they have brought
us to our senses.
A good Christmas present for your literate friends is a
year's subscription to the Gazette-Times. How else can you
alternately please and irritate them every week for a whole
year? Each time they get a copy they remember you and how
nice (or how atrocious) it was for you to remember them for
Christmas every week in the year. From now through
Christmas Eve we'll send a Christmas Card and gift
certificate bearing your name. Who knows, they might thank
you for it !
One of the hottest retail items for area merchants is a
double-duty, reinforced crying towel. The so-called energy
crisis has most of them so uptight and gloom-and-doom about
shortages that they've let it interfere with their normal
business practices. Well, take heart. The Cadillac Division of
General Motors has just announced an all-time calendar year
sales record has been established this year. Glenn Walker of
Comrie Cadillac in Pendleton got the telegram Dec. 6.
Cadillacs aren't the cheapest or lowest-priced cars to
operate, but his firm has sold every one it can get its hands
on. And 269,219 of them were sold from January through
November of this year. That shows the buying public has
more confidence in the economy than some merchants.
There ought to be a moral here. Tell the people you've got a
good product, convince them, and they'll buy it. Crisis or not.
The state civil rights commission has reprimanded an
Indianola, Iowa, newspaper for carrying a want ad, "man
wanted for assistant manager" for a department store. The
commission charged the ad should have stated that a
"person" was wanted for the job. We are in a hazardous
business. Our language, action and attitude is undergoing
change by legislation. The U.S. Census Bureau has revised 52
of the 441 job titles in its Occupational Classification System,
and we can be in bad trouble if we call somebody a
"salesman" instead of a "salesperson" or a "cotton-picking
bum" instead of a "recipient." In most cases the suffix
"man" has been replaced with "worker" or "operator." I
wouldn't advise you risking being thrown into the dungeon
for calling a "Launderer" a "laundress." That's not legal!
And an airline stewardess is no longer a stewardess, she's a
flight attendant . A clergyman is now a clergy; a credit man a -credit
and collection manager; salesman a salesworker;
office boy an office helper; pressman a printing press
operator; seamstress a dressmaker; chambermaid a
lodging quarters cleaner ; private maid in the home a private
household cleaner; fireman a firefighter; policeman a
police; busboy a waiters' assistant-arid so on for 40 more
such changes. Ah, women's lib! A lot of dame foolishness that
is changing the vital qualities of our living.
: rj a 7L'TTf.Tiurc
MORROW COUNTY'S NEWSPAPER y
e 197. HeppMr, Or, t Hit, Tel. ui-tm .v
"ii you wt w i ii eowimeo. ohm let it mppm" :jj
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Feb. 15. KU. ;'i
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"Nobody's going to believe this!"
Give thanks for the shortages!
By JAMES RESTON
The craziest notion that has
hit this country in a long
while-and we've had quite a
few nutty notions lately-is
that shortages of gas, beef and
a lot of other things are bad for
the American people.
What America really needs
is more shortages. It is not our
shortages but our surpluses
that are hurting us. Too much
gas, too much booze, too much
money, talk, noise and-fire
me tomorrow! - too much
newsprint are our problem.
We need to cut down, slow
up, stay home, run around the
block, eat vegetable soup, call
up old friends, and read a book
once in a while. Americans
have always been able to
handle austerity, and even
adversity. Prosperity's what's
been doing us in.
For most of this century, we
have been told by our leaders
that it was our right and "
destiny to to have two cars and
a boat for Sundays. The more
we consumed, the more the
nation would prosper. The
voice of America was the
voice of the hawker, the
prevalent melody of America
was the singing commercial.
Buy more, consume more, get
more things, even if you can't
afford them. The sky's the "
limit, and happiness is acquis-f
itiveness, getting more things,- M
Wouldn't you rather have a
Buick? And if you can't '-.i
believe in the latest salesman
on TV, who can you believe in?
Nobody suggested that the
nation's resources were finite
or that our power was limited.
We thought money tells and
the big guns win. The biggest
is the best. We are No. 1. But
lately, it appears that No. 1 is
running out of gas, that the big
money and the big guns didn't
win in Vietnam or in the
Middle East, and that we
might be a little cold here and
there in America this winter.
The almighty dollar has
been devalued twice in the last
18 months. The Japanese and
the western Europeans have
mastered the arts of the
computer and the scientific
revolution, and seem to know
more a bout la bor-management
relations than we do. And last
year, competing with the
Japanese and European in
dustries, America restored
after the last world war, the
United States had a spec
tacular trade deficit in the
world of $6.4 billion.
Nevertheless, it wasn't until
President Nixon began talking
about rationing gasoline, and
jacking up the prices of
furnace oil, that the people
began to wake up. You can
fiddle with an American's
freedom at Watergate, but if
you monkey with his car,
brother, you're in trouble.
Accordingly, the recent talk
of shortages of gas has
brought a lot of people down to
reality. President Nixon has
asked us all to conserve
pool. Would this really destroy
the republic?
The chances are that every
body would be safer and
healthier, that the old man
would know more about other
people's problems by riding
the bus, that junior's options
would be limited and that,
without a car, his contribution
"We may now enjoy some of the riches
of living that have been lost in a sea
of surplus ..."
energy by keeping our cars to
50 miles an hour, and keeping
the thermostats down at home
to 68 degrees, and he has
offered to set an example. He
is cutting off the lights, and
presumably the tape-recorders,
in the White House at
10 o'clock every night. No
doubt he will conserve fuel by
staying home more, or will
" travel to Camp David, Key
Biscayne and San Clemente
from now on by train.
This is all to the good. The
Arab nations have done us a
favor by cutting off their oil
and forcing us to be self
sufficient at home. Suppose
everybody in America sud
denly became sensible -which
is quite an assump
tion - and kept their cars to 50
' miles an hour, and their
houses at 68 degrees to save
energy. '
Also suppose that all those
advertising signs were shut
off, and junior's car was sold
or junked and he had to walk
to the corner drug store to loaf
and watch the girls in the
evening, or even that the old
man had to get to work in the
morning on the bus or in a car
Common
Council meets
to the population problem
would probably diminish.
None of these potential
bounties to American life
would have been possible if it
had not been for the black
mail threats of the Arab oil
states in the Middle East. By
ourselves, we would probably
never have had the common
sense or discipline to cut the
speed limit to 50 miles an hour
or stop steaming ourselves in
our houses, or blinding our
selves with optic noise from
electric signs for pills and
triple edged shavers, and sexy
movies in Times Square.
But now the threatened
shortage of gas, oil, and heat
has finally brought people to
their senses, and the only
trouble with Henry Kissin
ger's successful comprise di
plomacy in the Middle East, is
that the Arabs may agree to
sell us their oil at higher
prices, and encourage us to go
on with our foolishness.
tonight
The Heppner Common
Council will meet tonjght
(Thursday) at 7 p.m. at the
City Hall.
On the agenda is a report of
the water committee on the
Lott-Rasmussen Addition;
report of the city engineer on
the 28 proposed new water
hookups; report of the city
engineer on water improve
ment construction; appoint
ment of urban representative
to the City Land Conservation
and Development Commis
sion ; and approval of monthly
bills and building permits.
Of animals, man
and otherwise
At its Nov. 27 meeting in the Harold Erwin home the
Bookworm Club heard two reviews of very different books.
Ruby Becket was a special guest of the club.
Helen Currin presented the first review of the 1971
biographical "Boss," which chronicles the life of Richard J.
Daley of Chicago. Mike Royko's account of Mayor Daley's
life and of Chicago and national politics has been called "The
best book ever written about an American city by the best
journalist of his time."
It makes Daley live and exposes his wheeling and dealing
and great power which reaches to Washington, D.C. The book
comes from the saloons and neighborhoods, the police
stations and political backrooms. It is about lies and
viciousness, about the worship of cement and the hatred
toward blacks and about the troubling cowardice that hides
behind religion and patriotism while the poor get clubbed and
killed. The Chicago Daily News said, "This book does more
written damage to a man than perhaps anything ever
published. There is no place where it will not be read and
quoted and kept and read again."
"Boss came out as a Signet non-fiction paperback at $1.25.
The second reviewer, Inez Erwin, chose James Herriot's
big-selline "All Creatures Great and Small," a delightful
novel by a British veterinarian which will. please animal
lovers those who like happy, interesting, career-type stories.
Many professional reviewers are predicting that this book
will become a classic.
Publishers call it a "a miracle," not too strong a label for a
book that offers something for everyone-gusto, humor,
pathos, information, romance, insight, style. "It is vicarious
living with one of the happiest and most admirable of people,
a veterinary surgeon in the Yorkshire Dales who can write
superlatively well."
All the action occurs in and around one Yorkshire town.
The identity of the region and the writer's deep affection for
it is vividly projected. The time span is two years. It begins
with Dr. Jim's arrival in 1937, in answer to a vet's advertise
ment for an assistant, and ends the day after Jim's marriage
to a farmer's daughter as utterly charming as he is. Other
major characters are the zany Dr. Siegfried, the senior vet,
and his rather ne'er-do-well younger brother, Tristan, also a
vet. The supporting cast includes some of the most
memorable cows, dogs and horses that one could ever hope to
meet in or out of print.
"All Creatures Great and Small" was published in 1972 and
was a Book-of-The-Month Club special alternater last
summer.
COW POKES By Ace Reid
The mail pouch
EDITOR:
I see that the state's investment in pension funds and other
trust funds in common stocks has lost many millions. Jim
George, investment manager, says its going to be "very
bad." We pay several money managers to throw these
fiduciary funds down the common stock "rat holes."
These mature in years "juveniles" claim it's just a paper
loss, because the state, like most institutions, does not sell
stock at the "low point." No one has ever been able to tell the
"low point," it may be many tens of millions additional loss
down the road. How much better to keep these funds out of .
the "Sucker Snatcher Common Stock Market" and into good
mortgages in Oregon to build up the state.
LOU WILHELM,
Portland.
P.S It's difficult to think of a governor, treasurer and
legislature silly enough to promote and allow this; but, such
is the case.
s-?t-T
Mayor of Hartman
DEAR MISTER EDITOR;
How long has It been since you heard somebody My they
wanted to git In their two cent worth?
You Jest don't hear much sbout the penny these days.
Nobody would give you hit thought, fer penny, but a heap of
ua will fill your ear free.
It ain't been to long back when folks would tell you a penny
saved it penny earned, but nowaday! If feller drops two or
three pennies in the country store when he is paying fer
somepun, he won't even stoop over to pick em up.
The fellers was discussing our money situation Saturday
bight, and after they studied it up one side and down the
other, they agreed this country is running out of everthing
but money and tt ain't worth nothing.
Zeke Grubb said he don't know nothing about high finance,
and he gits that mixed up, but he was of a mind that It'll be
good fer folks to relize they is more to the good life than
writing checks and shuffling credit cards.
Fer one thing, allowed Zeke, we pack houses in them big
city subburbs til the hole place looks like a honeycomb. Ever,
house has lifelines running to it fer heat, water, sewage, and
folks that live there figger all they got to do to keep
everything running smooth is pay their bills ever month. But
when you run out of whatever one of them wires and pipes
brings to the house or takes away from It, all the check
writing in the world ain't no help.
Ed Doolittle said he has been follering this "energy crisis"
in the papers, and he knows they is more to it than lazy
politicians. They ain't no way, went on Ed. you can pass a law
to make more oil this winter when it took nature a million
years to make what we've used up in the last 50. You can
blame a lot of stuff on the Republicans right now, said Ed, but
we was burning a lot of gas and oil afore the Nixon
Administration, and we shore ain't been putting none back in
the ground.
Actual, broke in Clem Webster, It looks like trees will be
the next thing to run out of.
Clem had saw where the price of firewood had jumped in
town from $20 a cord to $60, and that folks is making $30 a
hour cutting wood with a gas-run chain saw. It used to be,
Clem said, that town folks built fireplaces and burned wood
cause the fire was pritty to look at. Now, they're buying wood
to keep warm by. Gem said one thing about wood is, it
warms you twict, when you cut it and when you burn It.
Gitting back to money, Bug Hookum said he had saw where
in Iran the currency is backed by jewels. Bug was wondering
what we got in this country to back up our money, and he
decided them gas coupon books we'll be gitting next year is
about as solid a investment as we got. A feller willing to park
his car andwalk can git a steady income selling his coupons.
And if they pass a law agin it, he can git rich selling em.
Yours truly,
MAYOR ROY.
Politely
rebellious
Bishops,
BY
LESTER KINSOLVING
Just five years ago, Pope Paul VI issued his explosively
controversial anti-contraceptive encyclical, Humanae Vitae.
Primarily on the basis of the immediate denunciation of
this encyclical by some 800 U.S. Catholic theologians (not to
mention what has been shown as a massive disregard for it
by most U.S. laity) this column made a prediction. I
suggested that within one decade the status of the Papacy
might well diminish to the same kind of powerless respect
held by Elizabeth II in Australia.
For the key to the real power of the Papacy is the right to
appoint all bishops. And in view of reported clergy rebellions
in the Dioceses of Fribourg (Switzerland) and Bocatucu
(Brazil ), it seemed as if Catholic laity world wide might be in
the process of insisting upon the right to local election of their
bishops.
Papal investiture in both cases seems to have weathered
the storm, and the Holy Father appears to have retained this
key to international ecclesiastical power.
But another problem has arisen. For the bishops
themselves have begun, politely, but quite definitely, to defy
the Pope on birth control.
The Catholic Bishops of Mexico, for example, recently
issued a public statement which should provide considerable
moral relief to devout Catholics - even as it raised eyebrows
and fevers in the Vatican:
"This decision of husband and wife - to have another child
or not - implies the right and responsibility to decide upon
the means. The decision they take regarding the means,
following with sincerity the dictates of their conscience, must
leave them with peace of mind, since they have no reason to
feel that they are drifting apart from divine friendship."
The Catholic Bishops of Indonesia have further stated that :
"Catholic medical institutions do not perform evil if they
responsibly advise and aid the requests of parents who desire
to avoid a new pregnancy by employing other methods than
total or periodical sexual abstinence."
The daring of these groups of bishops may well have been
inspired by one of their fellow prelates who dared to speak
out on this subject a year before the Pope's encyclical.
The most Rev. Thomas Roberts, retired Archbishop of
Bombay, has charged that the arguments for Humanae Vitae
were "quite unconvincing," and a form of what he calied
"Papal fundamentalism." He continued to say: "that the
Pope would lose credibility if he permitted what other Popes
did not."
A year before the encyclical. Archbishop Roberts told a
Cambridge University Catholic audience that individual
conscience should dictate a Catholic's conduct regarding
contraception, as well as celibacy and abortion.
The university's acting Catholic Chaplain, a rash fellow
Jesuit named Joseph Christie, actually disrupted the
Archbishop's lecture, because, in his words:
'The Archbishop was preaching heresy under my roof, and
I wasn't going to stand for it!" '
This reaction and the Archbishop's trenchant response was
heard around the world by Catholics who noted that Roberts
was ahead of his peer in bnihfclpsiagtirqi ?2.r. snd his
ability to reason.
Hence for most Catholics it seems that the Pontiff's
denunciation of contraception on the grounds that it is
artificial is regarded with all the enthusiam of an encyclical
condemning artificial respiration.
This opposition includes the inventor of "the pill", Dr. John
Rock, a Catholic, who recently predicted that the next Pope
will approve of both birth control and abortion.
"Now ain't this ridiculous!"
An alert reader in Pocatello, Idaho, Rudolph Grimm, has
noted quite correctly that it w-s Napoleon rather than
Charlemagne who snatched his crown from the Pope's
hands, as mentioned in this column's recent description of a
White House worship service.