1
ttome and farm maoazixe section
13
By
Geo. Ban
IfoCutcbeon
HOME AND FARM MAGAZINE SECTION SERIAL.
A Fool and His Money
Copyright, 1913,
By Geo. Barr
MeCuteheon.
BYBOPSIg OF PREVIOUS
INSTALLMENTS.
In the opening instalmenta of "A A
Pool tnd His Money," Geo. Bur Me- $
Ootcbeon'a charming novel, aerial
rights for which have been specially
obtained for tha Home and Farm
Megaiine Section, we learn of John $
Bellamy Smart, the young man who
it telling this story. He baa just
written hia first novel, and at the S
same time ha. fallen heir to an im-
mense fortune left him by hii uncle.
He la 85 yean of age.
After a visit to London, mart A
7.. i ?"p on tlw Ri"r Dabe. $
After finding an aid-world town, he g
ojreri an ancient castle, which he
mTu 'rem iU evna' tb Count. Q
With his secretary, Poopendyke, ha $
takes possession of the immense
structure, which is supposed to be S
tenanted only by the caretaker and
family, the Bchmicks. To Smart's S
amassment, the first night, he bears J,
toe cry of a baby. Later he discovers $
woman's face at an upper window. .
tit ,ii toa much interested to attend
to His oorrespondenee, as is desired hy &
tut secretary. Smart determines to J
solve the mystery ef the east wing of a
tha castle and enters a window by $,
means of a ladder. He is blocked b a,
a stout door, on which is pinned a S
note reading: "Please keep out. This
ia private property." Lester he meets
.the woman, who greatly puiiles him.
"No tourists enter this place tomor
row or any other day," I declared,
firmly.
'Well, I'd suggest waiting just the
Mine, sir," said he, evidently inspired.
"Confound them," I growled, some
low absorbing his presentiment.
He hesitated for a moment near the
door,
.
3
,
i
if
,
':
i
"Conrad," said I, fixing the ancient
with a stern, compelling gaze, "this has
gone qinte far enough."
"Yes, mein herr!"
"Do you serve me, or do yon serve
the lady in the east wingt" .
"I do," said he, with a great deal
more wit than I thought he possessed.
For a moment I was speechless, but not
for the reason yon may suspect. I was
trying to fix my question and his re
sponso quite clearly in my memory so
that I might employ ttiom later in the
course of a conversation between char
acters in my forthcoming novel.
"Will yon put in the telephone, sirf
lie asked very respectfully.
Very curiously, I was thinking of it
u mat instant.
"it really wouldn't be a bad idea,
jsntwn," i said, startled into com
mitting myself. "Save us a great deal
legging it over town and all that
ort of thing, eh!"
"Yes, lir. What I was about to sug
gest, sir, is that while wo're about it
we might as well have a system of elec
tric bells put in. That is to say, sir, in
both wings of the castle. .Very con
venient, air, you see, for all parties
oneerned."
"I see," said I, impressed. And
then repeated it, a little more im
pressed after reflection. ''I see. You
are a very resourceful fellow, Britton.
I am inclined to bounco all of the
Bchmicks. They have known about this
from tho start and have lied like
thieves. By Jove, she must have an ex
traordinary power over them, -or
claim, or something equally potent.
Now I think of it, she mentioned a
grandfather. That would go to prove
she's related in some way to some one,
wouldn't itl"
"I should consider it to be more
than likely, sir," said Britton with a
perfectly ttraight face. He must have
been sorely tried in the face of my
inane maunderings. "Pardon me, tir,
but wouldn't it bo a tip-top idea to
have it out with the Schmicks tonight! i
Being, air, as you anticipate a rather
wakeful night, I only make so bold as
to suggest it in the hopes you may 'avc
some light on the subject before you
elose your eyes. .In other words, sir,
a aa you won't be altogether iu the
dark when morning comes. Bee wot I
meant"
"Excellent idea, Britton. Well have
them up in my study."
He went off to summon my double
faced servitors, while I wended my way
to the study. There I found Mr. Poopen
dyke, sound asleep in a great arm
chair, both his mouth and his nose open
and my first novel also open in his lap.
Conrad and Grctcl appeared with
Britton after an unconscionable lapse of
time, partially dressed and grumbling.
"Where are your sons!" I demanded,
at once suspicious.
Conrad shook his sparsely eovered
bead and mumbled something about
each being his brother's keeper, all of
which was Greek to me until Britton
explained that they were not to be
found in their customary quarters that 1
is to say, in bed. Of eourso it was quite
elear to me that my excellent giants
were off somewhere, serving tho inter
ests of the bothersome lady in the east
Wing.
"I have been talking with the lady
this evening," said I.
"Yes, mein herr; I know," said he.
"Oh, yon do, eht "Well, will you be
good enough to tell me what tho devil
the meaning of all this two-faced,
underhanded conduct on your partf "
He lowered his head, closed his thin
lips and fumbled with the hem of bis
smock in a significantly sullen manner.
It was evident that he meant to defy
me. His sharp little eyes sent a warn
ing look at Gretel, who instantly ceased
her mutterings and gave over asking
Ood to bear witness to something or
other. She was always dragging in the
Deit
"Now, see here, Conrad, I want the
truth from you. Who is this woman,
and why are you so infernally set upon
shielding her! What crime has she com
mitted! Tell mo at once, or, by the
Lord Harry out you go tomorrow nil
of you."
"I am a very old man," ho whined,
twisting his gnarled fingers, a sugges
tion of tears iu his voice. "My wife is
old, mein herr. You must not be cruel.
Wo have been here for Bixty years. The
old baron "
"Enough!" I cried resolutely. "Out
with it, man. I mean all that I say."
He was still for a long time. looking
first at the floor and then at me; fur
tive, appealing, uncertain little glances
from which ho hoped to derive comfort
by catching me with a twinkle in my
eye. I have a stupid, weak way of
letting a twinkle appear there even
when I am trying to be harRh and
domineering. Britton has noticed it fre
quently, I am sure, and I 'hink he
rather depends upon it. But now I real
ized, if never before, that to betray
the slightest sign of rentleness would
be to forever forfeit my standing as
master in my own honse. Conrad saw
no twinkle. Ho began to weaken.
'Tomorrow, mein herr, tomorrow,"
mumbled, in a final plea. I shook
my head. "She will explain everything
tomorrow, ' ho went on eagerly. "I am
sworn to reveal nothing, mein herr. My
wife, too, and my sons. We may not;
speak until she gives the word. Alas!
we shall be turned out to die in our
"We have been faithful servants to
tho Rotlihoefens for sixty years,"
sobbed his wife.
And still are, I suspect," I cried
angrily.
Ach, mein herr mem herr!" pro
tested Conrad, greatly perturbed.
"Where are the keys, you old ras
cal! " I demanded so sternly that even
Poopendyke waB startled.
Conrad almost resorted to the ex
pediency of grovelling. "Forgive! for
give!" he groaned. "I have done only
what wts best."
"Produce the keys, sir!"
"But not tonight, not tonight," he
pleaded. "She will be very angry. She
will not like it, mein herr. Ach, Gott!
She will drive us out, she will shame
u- all! Ach, and she who is so gentle
and so unhappy and so so kind to all
of us! I I cannot I cannot! No!"
Mr. Poopcndyke's common sense came
in very handily at this critical juncture.
He counselled me to lot the matter rest
until the next morning, when, it was
reasonable to expect, tho lady herself
would explain everything. Further ap
peal to Schmick was like brtting one's
head against a stono wall, he said.
Moreover, Conrad's loyalty to the lady
was most commendable.
Conrad and Gretel beamed on Poopen-
dyke. They thanked him so profound
ly, that I couldn't help feeling a bit
sorry for myself, a tyrant without a
backbone.
"Jah, jahl" Conrad cried gladly.
"Tomorrov she will explain. Time
enough, Herr Poopendyke. Time enough,
eoi"
"Well," said I, somewhat feebly,
where do I come in!"
They caught the note of surrender in
my voice and pounced upon their op
portunity. Before they had finished
with me, it was quite thoroughly estab
lished that I was not to come in at all
until my neighbor was ready to admit
me. They convinced me that I was a
meek, futile suppliant and not the mas
ter of a feudal stronghold. Somehow
I was made to feel that if I didi.'t be
have myself I stood in considerable
danger of being tnrned off the place.
However, we forced something out of
Schmick before his stalwart sons came
tramping np the stairs to Tescue him.
The old man gave us a touch of inside
history concerning Schloss Rothhoefen
and its erstwhile powerful barons, not
to minimize in the least sense the
peculiar prowess of the present Amazon
who held forth tonight in the east wing
and who, I had some reason to suspect
was one of the family despite the un
mistakable flavor of Fifth Avenue and
Newport.
About the middle of the nineteenth
eentury the last of the real barons
tho powerful, land owning despotic
barons, I mean eame to the end of his
four-score years and ten, and was laid
away with great pomp and glee by the
people of the town across the river.
He was the last of the Eothhoefens,
for he left no male heir. Hia two daugh
ters had married Austrian noblemen.
and neither of them produced a male
descendant. The estate, already in a
state of financial as well as physical
disintegration, fell into the hands of
women, and went from bad to worse
so rapidly that long before the last quar
ter of the century was fairly begun the
castle and the reduced holdings slipped
away from the Rotlihoefens altogether
and into tho control of the father of
the Count from whom I purchased the
property. The Count's father, it ap
pears, was a distiller of great wealth
in his day, and a man of action. Unfor
tunately he died before he had the
chance to carry out his projects in con
nection with tho rehabilitation of
Schloss Rothhoefen, even then a de
serted, ramshackle resort for paying
tourists and a Mecca for antique and
picture dealers.
The new Count my immediate prede
cessor was not long in dissipating the
great fortune left by his father, the
worthy distiller. He ran through with
the bulk of his patrimony by the time
ho was twenty-five and was pretty
much run down at the heel when he
married in the hope of recouping his
lost fortune.
The Schmicks did not like him. They
did not approve of him as lord and
master, nor was it possible for them
to resign themselves to the fate that
had put this young scapegrace into the
shoes, so to speak, of the grim old
barons Rothhoefen, who whatever else
they may have been in a high-handed
sort of way were men to th core. This
pretender, this creature without brains
or blood, this sponging reprobate, was
not to their liking, if I am to quote
Conrad, who became quite forceful in
his harangue agaiLSt the recent order
of things.
He, bis wife and sons, he assured me,
wore full of rejoicing wtna they
learned that the cattle had passed from
Count Hohendahl's hands into mine. I,
at least, would pay them their wages,
and I might, in a pinch, be depended
upon to pension them when they got
too old to be of any use abont the
CJtle.
At any rate, it seems, I was a dis
tinct improvement over the Count, who
had been their master for a dozen very
lean and unprofitable years. Things
m;ght be expected to look np a bit,
with me at the head of the house. Was
it not possible for a new and mighty
race to rise and take the p'ace of the
glorious R thhoefens! A long line of
Baron Schmarts! With me as the pros
pective root of a thriving family tree!
At least, that is what Conrad said, and
I may be pardoned ior quoting him.
I am tn ly sorry the old rascal put
it into my head.
But the gist of the whole matter was
this: There are no more Rothhoefens,
and soon, aod willing, there would be
no more Hoheodahls. Long live th
Schmarts! Conrad invariably pro
nouiced my name with the extra eon
sonants and an umlaut.
All attempts on my part to connect
the lady in the east wing with the his
tory of the extinct Rothhoefens were
futile. He vrould not commit himself.
"Well," said I, yawning in helpless
collusion with the sleepy Gretel, "well
let it go over till morning. Call me at
seven, Britton."
Conrad made haste to assure me that
the lady would not receive me before
eleven o'clock. He begged me to sleep
till nine, and to have pleasant dreams.
I went to bed but not to sleep. It was
very clear to me that my neighbor was
a disturber in every sense of the word.
She wouldn't let me s'eep. For two
hours I tried to get rid of her, but she
filtered into my brain and prodded my
thoughts into the most violent activity.
She wouldn't stay put
My principal thoughts had to do with
her identity. Somehow I got it into my
head that she was one of the female
Rothhoefens, pitiable nonentities if Con
rad's estimate is to be accepted. A de
scendant of one of those girl-bearing
daughters of the last baron! It sound
ed very agreeable to my fancy's car,
and I cuddled the hope that my sur
mise was not altogether preposterous.
My original contention that she was
a poor relation of old Schmick and some
what dependent upon him for charity
to say the least bad been set aside for
more reliable convictions. Instead of
being dependent upon the Schmicks, she
seemed to be in an exalted position
that gave her a great deal more power
over them than even I possessed; they
served her, not me. From time to time
there occurred to me the thought that
my own position in the household was
rather an ignoble one, and that I was
a very weak and incompetent succes
sor to baronial privileges, to say noth
ing of rights. A real baron would have
had her out of there before you could
mention half of Jack Robinson, and
there wouldn 't have been any sleep lost
over distracting puzzles. I deplored mj
lack of bad manners.
(To Be Continued.)
Predicament of a Suffragist
A well-known university professor
who has taken much interest in the
woman's suffrage movement was per
snaded to carry a banner in a parade
that was held in New York gome
months ago.
His wife observed him marching with
a dejected air and carrying his banner
so that it hung limply on its standard,
and later she reproved him for not mak
ing a better appearance.
"My dear," meekly replied the pro
fessor, "did you see what was on tho
banner! It read, 'Any man can vote.
Why cant If "
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