A BIT OF SUNSHIN.
fiing, plnR, you swtiet bird, my yollow oaninr,
Yuu frk'nd of my h.lmit buum!
However the uitmilsof Mm household may vary
Tkure's a bright note from you, my yollow ca
nary! Tour song soon follows In shower.
Supposing the telephone call Is most trying,
Or (lis nr(an tfrttidor Is hoard,
Or unwelcome Rare In knocking and prying
Till wo all aver we would ratlier he dying,
HUH you trill and trip It. my blrdl
In the hush of summer when robins are dozing
Your warble rolls olear In a tune.
When callers are faulting and laughing and
prosing, ,
And 1 am a tropical yawn half disclosing,
Your cheery roulade is a boon!
You like my caressing, my glance and my
praising:
You hop and you perk, don't you, Dtok?
Your Intelligent ways are simply amazing!
The whole day long you are never caught
lazing.
For you peck and you sing "double qutokl
But at dusk you mount the perch of your
chousing
To dream through a "sleep of the Just!1 -You
tuck your head in to avoid risk of losing,
And each fairy feather stands guard while
you're snoozing.
Dtok, you took like a star of gold dustt
Rose H. Lathrop In Ladies' Homo Journal. -
Catching a Wildcat In One's Bands.
The wild jungle cats of southern
India are tall, long legged, bold and
(lunperou.i animals. Que of them
was prevented from doing serious in
jury to General Hamilton by the
skill he had acquired in catching
cricket balls.
The cat came to the cantonment
prowling after fowls. The dogB were
set on its track, and for some time
there was an exciting chase among
the hedges which divided the offi
cers' quarters.
Then there came a long check, the
dogs having lost the scent. Hamil
ton at lost espied the cat squatting
in a hedge ana called the dogs.
When they came, he knelt down and
began clapping his hands and cheer
ing them on. Suddenly the cat
sprang at his face, but he caught it
as one would a cricket ball, gave its
ribs a strong squeeze and threw it to
the dogs.
The cat had made its teeth meet in
his arm, and for weeks he carried it
in a sling. Youth's Companion.
The rygmles of Spain.
As might have been expected the
dwarf race of Morocco and the Atlas
has been traced to Europe, and fairly
pure types are found in Bpain, espe
cially in the province of Uerona.
These people are only 8 feet 7 inches
to 8 feet 0 inches high and are other
wise characterized by a yellow skin,
broad, square faces, Mongolian eyes
and red hair of a woolly texture.
Specimens of them are occasionally
to be seen in the markets or bum-
manca, and there is said to be a num
ber in the Col de Tosos and the valley
of Kibos, several hours by roil from
Toulouse. It is not improbable that
the Mongolian eye, which i observed
in a small percentage of Welsh and
English people, is derived by inherit
ance from the Iberian pygmies or a
common ancestry. Cossels Maga-
nne.
Found Xn Nearly Every Village.
There is gonerally somebody a
lady as a rule in each district, on
whom its iinest maluprops ore fa
thoved, sometimes quite unfairly. It
is she who is reported to have made
that speech about the glories of her
f ather s house, up to the door of which
there run a' 'reveuuo of popular trees,
she who asked her daughter to play
that little "malady" she had learned
at the "cemetery," and she again who
pronounced Mr. Brown as "proud as
Luther," while the turt hunting Mr,
Smith was such a "toby" he deserved
to be "tattooed" at his club. Dear
Mrs. Muluprop, what should we do
without her? London Ulobe.
Just What Eduction Is.
In a composition upon "Education"
a boy once wrote, "Education is go
ing to school, which is being marked
every day and examined on paper
and then promoted, and if you are a
girl you graduate and have flowers,
but if you are a boy you don't have
flowers; you only go to college."
somewhat unique, deplorable, but
comprehensive definition I Journal
ot Judication.
Deteoted.
"Say, Bob," said the zealous new
custom house inspector, "I've caught
a feller here in a lie. Shall I report
him!"
"What's the lie?" asked the other.
"He's tryin to bring in a box he
gays only has gloss in it, but it i
marked fragile. What's the rate on
fragile)" Harper's Bazar.
"How'd the barbecue come ottr"
"JV mlddlin."
"Any acoldentsf"
"No; three men killed In a row, an two
more dropped fer pastime, but so acci
dent. "Atlanta uonatituuon.
Bad luck at Poker.
Xantlppe (as her spouse returns to his
home) Boors, tes, there is flush on jxrar
oheeksl
The Philosopher Just my blame luck!
As I didn't have a flush in my hands all
renin. Chicago Heoord,
THE GERMAN SOLDIER.
Two Unpardonable Offenses In the German
Army Relate to Kfllclency.
There are two things which the
German officer does not end cannot
condone one is nonefflciency of the
soldier's rifle, the other a c'.iafed foot.
either of these two takes place on
the march or during the maneuvers,
the soldier is immediately punished
with arrest and is not allowed to
offer any excuse. During the differ
ent maneuvers of German army
corps that I have attended I cannot
recall a handful of footsore men in
the course of a day's work, and yet
at all these field operations forced
marches are a feature in order to
tat the endurance of officers and
men.
The secret of this uniform excel
lence as regards marching powers
lies in the training which the men
recei ve. When they enter their com
pany as recruits in October, the first
thing that is impressed upon their
minds is the importance of the shoe
and the musket. No pains are spared
in giving the men at the start com
fortable footgear, and they are ex
pected to look after this with as
much interest as if it were a chro
nometer. In the spring following, when the
snow is off the ground, marches are
undertaken, and these are regulated
as carefully as ore the strokes and
the courses of the college crew un
der the hands of the trainer. Each
day the men march half a mile or so
farther than the day before; each
day they carry on their back an
ounce or two more; each day the
speed they are able to maintain is
carefully noted; in fact, the record
of a company's marching from day
to day until late in the summer
when they move into the open coun
try is kept as minutely as if it were
a single picked company training for
a match or competitive drill.
The German soldier is educated
and trained for the purpose of fight
ing, and to have a man fall out be
fore he reacheB the fire line is looked
upon as quite as much a disaster as
if he had been shot and wounded by
the enemy: The art of war, as prac
ticed in Germany, is very much the
art of "getting there," and it is the
general who posts himself most ad
vantageously at the critical moment
that may be assumed to have won
the battle. Harper's.
Electrical Photography.
A college professor hoe hit upon a
means of making pictures of old
coinB and similar objects electrically.
The coin, medal or engraved plate of
which a figure is required is made to
form one of the metallic coatings of
an electrical condenser, a photo
graphic plate or piece of bromide pa
per being placed between the two.
When a condenser so arranged is
subjected to rapid charge for a frac
tion of a second by connecting the
coatings with the terminals of an in
duction mil or a similar source of
electrioity, the prepared surface of
the dry plate is chemically altered,
aud upon developing the plate in the
usual manner a picture of the com
or medal will be found upon it. Pic
tures can be produced m this man
ner even when the sensitized plates
have been exposed to full daylight
The best results are obtained by con
ducting the process with oxygen un
der a pressure of about two atmos
pheres. New York Telegram.
"Freedom of Worship" In Russia.
If the Saviour himself should ap
pear, poor and unknown, in a Rus
sian peasant village, as he appeared
in Galilee 19 centuries ago; if he
should speak to the people the some
words that he spoke in Galilee and
that are recorded in the four gos
pels, he would not be at liberty 24
hours. He would first be handcuffed
and sent to the pale of settlement by
etape as a Jew, and then, if he con
tinued to teach, he would be rear
rested and thrown into prison. If
he finally escaped crucifixion at the
hands of the holy orthodox church
which bears his name, it would be
only because crucifixion has been su
persoded in Russia by exile, incar
ceration in the "heretic cells" of re
mote monasteries and deportation to
the mines of Transbaikalia. George
Kennan in Century. '
Takes the Golden "Ball.
A former sultan so runs the story
offered a golden ball for lying.
Many bed to him, but the sultan re
plied that he could himeelf lie better.
Finally an aged man from Angora
appeared before him with a large jar
on his shoulders. "Y&ur father," he
said, "borrowed a jar like this full of
gold from my father and said that
you would repay the gold to his son."
"Impossible," said the sultan. "If
the story be true," replied the pil
grim, "pay your father's debt If
impossible, I have won the golden
ball." The sultan at once awarded
him the prize. London Truth.
TECHY.
Bnt Prospect of Dissection Woke Up the
i Old Man.
About half a mile beyond the em roads
I came to a cabin around which a dozen or
more people were clustered, and when I
stopped and asked what had happened one
of tbe men replied:
"We uckon ole Mose Bingham bees dun
died this time fur shore!"
"Wrbo was Mose Hinghamf"
"Old man powerful techy lived on this
yere squat of land. That's bis ole woman."
The woman was about 50 years of age
and was smoking a corncob pipe and was
taking matters very calmly. She approach
ed me and asked:
"Stranger, kin ye preach a funeral ser
mon?" "I never have."
"Needn't be much of a sermon," she con
tinued. "It's fur my ole man, inside, 1
reckon he's dtin gone at last. If yo' ar'
gwine to stop around yere tonight, I'd like
to hev yo' do the preachin tomarrow. Meb
be, however, be hain't dead, and you only
lose time."
"What was the matter with him,
ma'am f"
"Nothin but techineas. He was the
techiest man In this hull state. That is
the fifth time he's died on me in two
years."
"How diedr"
"Why, flopped right down on his back,
bet his eyes an dun died. He generally
comes to life arter I've coaxed him fur a
couple of hours, but this time he 'pears to
hev died fur good. It's bin nigh 15 hours
since he flopped down."
"Yes, I reckon he won't prance round on
this yere airtb no mo'," added one of the
men in tbe group.
I had a little talk with the wife and four
or five others, and then we all entered the
cabin. The old man lay on the bed, and
at first glonoe he seemed to be a corpse.
After watching him a couple ot minutes,
however, I made up my mind that be
wasn't, aud standing beside him I said to
the woman:
"Yes, madam, your husband has passed
away, and as you want to know what he
died of I will begin operations. I think I
will take out his heart first. Two of you
men bring in a tub of water."
Both of the dead man's eyes flew open,
and he sat up and looked around. We re
turned his stare, and nothing was said for
a minute. Then he whirled his legs off the
bed and said:
"Yo' all think yo'r powerful peart, I
reckon, but thar's no peartness about itl I
jest come back to life to tell tbe ole wom
an sot to feed that yere mewl over two
ears of co n at a leedin, but bem yo' all ar'
feelin so powerful peart I won't dieno mo' I
I'll jeBt live to hurt yo'r feelin's and spite
tbe ole woman! 'Detroit Free tress.
Illustrated Phrase.
A candid young man who is rather stuck
up. Brooklyn Life.
The Poet Laureate
"Ruskin," remarked her majesty, "I sup
pose you know my grandson has just been
married."
"Yes, your highness," rejoined the poet
laureate.
"Are you mindful of your sworn duty,"
the queen inquired, "to burst Into song?"
"liour highuess, I am."
Whereupon Mr, Ruskin took from his
pocket the following lines, which he read
with fine effect:
Welcome the maiden with garlands of flowers
As she enters this tough royal family of ours.
Rise up, 0 Britain, and fall on her neck;
Welcome her, welcome her, Mary of Teclc.
The queen brushed away a tear and or
dered three copies struck off on a type
writer. Detroit Tribune.
A Good Reason.
"Now, which kind of music do you de
sire to become proficient in?" said the pro
fessor to the new pupil.
"Oh, classical, by all means," replied the
young woman.
"I am very glad to hear you express this
preference,"
"Xes. When you play classical music,
hardly anybody knows whether you make
a mistake or not." Washington Star,
The Cmplre.
He stands before the eager, surging throng
Weary and wretched, aud the mighty
crowd
Cheer all the men around him wondrous
strong,
But threaten him with Imprecations loud.
Yea. mock the man whose object Is to please,
Without a tinge of Bhame, Bad and forlorn
He stands where balls fly thickest, but they
freeae
The marrow In his bones with looks of
corn.
Be knows this weary hour may he his last,
But on hts noble brow no trace of fear
AmiearB. His eyes uuon the field are oast;
His form Is bent with sorrow and with oa
Ha lifts his ewand in a hollow tone
(Full well he knows he cannot please them
ail),
With features rigid as a block of stone.
He cries, "Play ballt'
Detroit Free Press.
AN EXPERIENCE OF TRAVEL
How a Woman Was Well Repaid For a
Little nit of Kindness.
It was a woman who was talking
a little, giddy looking thing but
she was speaking quite nervously to
her traveling companions, telling a
story of her experience on a former
trip.
Yes, she was saying, "Mrs. B.
was with me, and I had my terrier
along, as I was going home on a vis
it, and as usual with women who are
traveling I didn't have any too much
money; in fact, I had spent all my al
lowance except a dollar and was
ashamed to let Jim know, so when
the conductor told me I must send
that dog to the baggage car and pay
tl for him at the end of the trip I
felt pretty bad."
"Mean old thing!" chorused the
company.
"He said that it wasn't his fault
that the dog was a perquisite of the
baggage man."
"And then he tied him up and
didn't give him a drink nor any"
"No, he didn't I Wait a minute.
The car was crowded, and there
wasn't a vacant seat At one of the
stations a tall, slim old lady with
white hair got in and stood leaning
against the side of the car door. I
was cross and disagreeable and for a
moment I just let her stand. Then
I felt ashamed of myself, and giving
the dog to my friend I went and
asked the woman to take my seat.
She did not want to, but I told her I
was going to walk up and down the
car aisle for exercise, which 1 did.
' 'That was just like you, Nelly"
"No, it wasn't. I'm awfully selfish,
but wait. After the car started a
man in a checked gingham blouse
and blue overalls came in and talked
to the old lady and called her "moth
er.' When he went out again, she
told us what a good son he was. At
the next station we stopped 20 min
utes, and Mrs. B. went out on the
platform, and we walked up and down
with Fido and left the mother and son
to visit together. And what do you
think! He was the horrid baggage
man, and he let me keep Fido and
wouldn t take a cent tor him, though
I offered him the last dollar I had.
He said that a seat for his mother
was worth more than that. Now,
wasn't that a pleasant experience?"
and the little woman smiled over the
memory. Detroit Free Press.
An Interesting Family
It seemed to be a ball of closely
packed wool or brown hair about an
inch in diameter moving steadily
along the path. As there was no
wind and no apparent explanation
of the movement of this mysterious
body I approached nearer, upon
which it ceased moving, and was to
all appearance just what it had at
first seemed to be. Knowing that
there must be life in or about
somewhere, I proceeded to poke it
with my umbrella. Just as the tip
of the staff was about to touch it the
object instantly spread out several
inches in all directions, the whole
mass again becoming motionless,
In the center of the figure thus
formed was revealed a large spider
ready to do battle for its young, the
surrounding patch of brown matter
which had radiated from it being
composed of myriads of little spi
ders, each so small that a single one
alone would scarcely liave been dis
cernible to the eye. Harper's Young
People.
A Saleswoman's Hard Question.
A lady had almost decided to buy
the coat she was trying on. The
weary saleswoman breathed a sigh
of relief. The customer had been
hard to suit. Even yet she fingered
the buttons and twitched the sleeves
thoughtfully.
What was this fur wbfcn it was
alive?" she asked abruptly as she ad
justed the collar.
The saleswoman hesitated and
stammered. She was torn between
a businesslike desire to make a sale
and a conscientious regard for the
truth. Her confusion was painful.
Well, ma'am, we have to call it
marten," she said at last, "but it was
skunk when it was alive." Youth's
Companion.
London Corporation Gifts to Royalty.
During the past century the Lon
don city corporation has expended
on 28 separate occasions something
like 30,000 upon gifts to royalty.
This is exclusive of the grant of 2,-
500 which has been voted for the
marriage present to the Duke of
York and Princess May. All the
sons of the queen are citizens by pat
rimony. The marriage presenta
tion to the Princess of Wales 30
years ago was a diamond necklace
and carriage which cost 10,000.
London Tit-Bits.
Teacher How many trips did Columbus
make to the new world r
Boy Three, mum. (
Teacher And after which one of these
fldidhedief-Truth.
GEORG1E,
His Description of an Interrupted Wed
ding Ceremony,
deereditur bil jonsons big brother got
maried on too) a nite over at his gurl
house an pa & ma went 2 the wedtn an tuk
me. bil an me wos 3 gether al nite an had
a grate time, al the peple went up stain ft
see tbe presunts wat wos standm on the
tables, thay was fine. 1 ot the presunts
was a toilet set. a toilet set is awash basia
an a bowl an things like that, all ot the
toilet set wos not on the table, bil node
ware it wos hided an he got the other part
out an put It on the table 2 bile brothers
gurl was orful mad.
just b 4 the wedin comencid bil sen 2 me.
georgie, say nothin, but things is al fixed
an we r gone 2 hair fun.
thay marched down stairs with the min-
isturahead an bils brother an his gurl
b hind. Bhe had wfte moskito net on her
hed an he had on a vest with al the front
cut out so that u cood see his shirt, he
luked gud an so did she.
a xtother man wot dident hair no front In
his vest set down 2 pla the planer wen thay
corned along an he banged an banged on
the keys, but the planer woodent matk no
sound.
evri 1 luked suprised an the ministur an
the gurl wot was gone 8 b married an bils
brother stud out in the hall waftin 4 the
march 2 commence, but It dident com
menceso thay come ahead without ani
moosic.
bil sed 2 me, low like, gorgie, 1 put a bed
slat acrost the strings in the planner so it
coodent pla.
bil had a long peace ot wire stickin out
on the side ot the doorway so wen the bride
corned along it caught In 2 her rale an
puled it off. she wos jest orfel mad, but
she dident no wat maid her vale come off.
then they stud up In the front part ov
the room an commencid 2 git married.
the minister sed, du u talk this lawfulli
weddin woman 2 b yure wife, 2 lure her an
a bay, In helth an death.
bils brother kinder chocked an his neck
got red an his shirt bosom creaked an he
clenched his fist an he opened his mouth,
an dident say nothin, so he shut it agana
an opened it an aed yes. i wos rele sorri
4 him, coss the way he went i thote he wos
gone 2 haiv a spasm.
then the ministur sed, du n talk this
man 2 live in helth an honor in deth 2 b
yure lawfulli weddin husbind, an du n
sware in the presence of the court that the
af ydavit is true 2 yure nowledge, an wil u
b true 2 him in all your tous.
the gurl looked strait at the ministur.
an her faic kep gettin witer al the time an
she wos picking leaves off her dress. Wen
the ministur got dun talkln sheluked down
at the floor an sed yea so low that no 1 cood
here it.
then bil went out In the hall an listened
2 the marriage thro the keyhole.
then the minister Bed, If thay is anibodi
here wat nose of ani reason wy this mar
riage should not go let him spit it out or 4
evir hold his tong.
the micistur stopped an 4 abote a half
xninit no 1 sed ani thing, but thay al luked
a round the room at each uther an bils
brother luked orful uncomfortable.
then bil shoved open the door an yelled
in with a voice like a old roan.
1 demand that this marrige stop.
u never seed such a time in al yure life
like thay wos thair. al tbe women screamed
an the gurl wat was gone 2 b marrid fainted,
she nocked over a high planner lamp an it
set fire 2 sum papir roses.
then evri 1 yellid fire an bi an bi the en
gines cum. the minister run out in 2 the
street with sum ov the roses wat was on
fire an they plade the hose on him. bils
brother wanted 2 kill the man who had sed
the weddin must stop, bil Johnson was
afraid to go home aftir.
p. a. the weddin is put off. gorgie.
New York Mercury.
A Bad Break.
Parson Whangdoodle Baxter of the
Thompson Street Blue Light tabernacle
I made a pastoral call at the flat of Sam
Johnsing, the object of the visit being to
remonstrate with Johnsing for eating pea
nuts during divine worship. Sam heard
his pastor's voice and hid behind a curtain,
while Mrs. Johnsing received the pastor
and assured him that Sam had gone up the
Hudson on an excursion. Unfortunately
the curtain did not quite reach the floor,
and some large, generous feet protruded.
So, you says dat bam has done gone off
on a skurshonf" queried the dusky cleric
Yes, parson, and he specs ter be gone all
day," replied Mrs. Johnsing.
"Well, be so kind ana tell bam when he
gits back dat de nex1 time he goes on a
Bkursbun he had better take his feet erlong
wid him," at the same time prodding Sam's
feet with his cane until he roared. Texas
Sittings.
A Cripple
Tramp I'd like to do something to pay
fer all this, but I'm a cripple, mum.
Housekeeper You don't look it. What's
the matter.
Tramp Writer's cramp, mum. I've been
keepin a list of all th' people wot offered
me work, mum. New York Weekly.
A Rambunctious Pet.
Miss City girl (before the accident) Look,
Mamie. That must be a pet lamb. See
how it is frisking to meet us. It doesn't
seem at all afraid. Harper's Bazar.
Which Ii a Reflection.
Jones (to Intoxicated friend) Good ta,
ens, man, here's your wifel LeUr '
back. tfii-:::v-v,
His Friend-No (hie). Sh-" 1 o
us. She's looking at hVir,('- '
windows to she if her'! " 1
. y .
kei