. -V- ( -J" f
11
The Royal Baking Powder is in
dispensable to progress in cookery
and to the. comfort and conve
nience of modern housekeeping.
Royal is undoubtedly the purest and most reliable baking
powder offered to the public S. -Gw't Chemisfs Report,
For finest food I can use none but Royal A. Fortin,
Cktfi White House, for Presidents Cleveland and Arthur
ELECTRICITY VERSUS HAYSEED.
Dry Baptist Cmmi ami Hit Bids ma
City Cur.
"Ef 1 plead guilty, squire, kin I explain the
circumstances "
"The law allows you to make any stata
meat you wish in your own defense, without
pleading guilty."
'Thauk ye. Well, squire, Vta Nahum Cra
vens to home, an1 1 hev bin a towuship trus
tee for nigh on to seven, year. I'm a Dry
Baptist, too, squire,"
"You are charged with disorderly conduct,
Mr. Cravens."
"So the gentleman down stairs sez afore 1
flome up, TVas this a-way, squire: 1 wanted
tar see them thiugs an' animals at the filoo or
Zoo place, an a policeman told me take a red
ear at Fifth and the postoffloe. 1 sees a car
svstsvading1 thar without no mules or bosses
to it, an' I ses:
" 'Be this the garden's car?
Yes, sir; st aboard.'
Whar's your bosses, f rieudP sea I, thinkin'
I should have ter wait.
" 'Dont have horses,1 ses the feller in blue
clothes.
" "Mules, I reckon f -sex 1, thinkm' be was
jokin'.
'No mules neither. Hurry up; ifsa-goin'
to start,1 sez be. i
" 'S'posa you work oxen on this line, ehf j
ata I, because I was gitthV riled. i
"'No, you old jay, we ain't got no oxen,''
aec he, auappish like. ' You've got one second ,
to get on.' I
"I got aboard, squire, an' had hardly time
so look about when toe consarned thing gave
jump an' went anyur along. By Jude, 1
didn't know what ter think. Whix-s-s!
whirr! ding-ding I I staggers out an' ses to
the feller:
" 'For land's sake, bow do she goP
M 'Electricity,' sex he.
"'WbarisitP sesL
M Up on the hill sec he.
M 'How on eirtu does she get down hyarf
HtL
'Oh, ratal Go set down V sez he.
"Just then 1 ketched sight of a pole reachio'
up from the top of the car to a clothes luie
stretched along, and I sees into the trick.
They were pulim' the dinged thing along
with a steam windlass. Then sez I: 'Young
man, I'm Nahum Cravens, a township trustee
for seven year, an' I don't allow no city whip
persnnpper to fool with me, an' "
"Mr. Cravens. I know the rest. You fought
like a pugilist and howled 'Murder!' You
are behind the march of civilization, and
I'm afraid hopelessly so. Pay the man with
the large diamond here $12, and go home and
cultivate cabbages. Next!"
When the township trustee called on the
old soldier for bis valise and umbrella after
ward that battle scarred patriot offered the
tobowing sage suggestion :
"Mr. Cravens, don't be surprised at any
thing nowadays. These electrickers are just
raisin' jesse. Between me an' you. Mister
Craveua, it wouldn't surprise me a bit to
-wake up some morning an' find a whizzgig
lockm' Bp r-npte in the cells I've been attend
in1 to for ii in? year last Thanksgiving. Give
my coni'.. meats to Miasm Cravens an' the
family. Cood-by, sir; good-by." mcinnati
Knqutrer.
, . . . ,.. -
My rrcttr Typewriter.
My office of late bos seemed brighter, .
Moiii cheerful by far than tt was;,..
It may be the pretty typewriter
Who hum oear my dnuk is tiie cause. -
A radiant, dashing young creature;
In typewriting circles a belle;
Although I'm unable to teach her
To punctuate rightly or spell.
Her mouth like a half opened rose is,
Her hair rivals gold in its bu&
Tip tilted ber dear little none Is,
Her eye are a heavenly blue.
I really should feel tost without her;
For while there's no cause for alarm,
There's something attractive about her;
a. thrilling, intangible charm. ,
Her typewritten letters are fearful,
WiLh errors tbey thickly are strewed;
Iscold her, and she becomes tearful,
And thinks I am awfully rude.
She break into silvery Laughter
As soon as forgiven, and I've
Unwritten no end of them after
hoe's Kone-she leave promptly at fire.
My wife, who is somewhat suspicious,
Dropped Into my office today,
And found well, I thought it judicious
To send my typewriter away.
I really shall feet lost without her,
For while I intended no harm,
My wife noticed something about her
That tilled ber dear soul with alarm.
-F. a Curtiss in New York Sua.
Tbe Old Question of the Coach.
Which, at any given moment, is moving
forward faster the top of a coach wheel or
the bottom F
The answer to this question seems sim
ple enough, but probably nine persona out
of ten, asked at random, would give the
wrong reply. It would appear at first
light that the top and bottom must be
moving at the same rate; that is, tbe speed
of the carriage. But by a little thought it
will be discovered that the bottom of the
wheel is, in act, by tbe direction of its mo
tion around its axis, moving backward, iu
aa opposite direction to that which tbe
carriage is advancing, and is consequently
stationary in space, while the point on top
of the wheel is moving forward with the
double velocity of its own motion around
tbe axis and the speed at which the car
riage movua.-New iork Tribune.
The Bane of the News Editor's Life.
The news editor was talking about cor
respondents. "I've got some of the bright
est correspondents in the country sending
us news," said he, "hut I want to remark,
when the rural correspondent gets an idea
that the rest of the world is sitting up
nights to bear tbe latest uews from his
hamlet he can add more sorrow, to the
life of a uews editor than auv man alive.
"I bad a correspondent once with whom
I labored earnestly. 1 broke him from the
habit of giving every dispatch an ornate
introduction that cost more for telegraph
tolls than the essential part of the article,
but he would never give up supplementing
tils specials with some comment. If 'hu
esteemed fellow townsman' had died he
felt compelled to throw in a few words to
mitigate the sorrow of the friends. One
day there was a big piece of news down
his way. A man killed his wife aud his
two children, mortally wounded his mother-in-law
and then shot himself.
"The correspondent started the telegram
all right. He dived right into the subject
and told the story graphically, but when
be got through he couldn't atop. He knew
the family of the deceased, ami felt that as
a neighbor and friend he ought to any
something at our expeuae to comfort them
a little, so he wound up his telegram with
these consoling words, 'This sad act of
the deceased was a great surprise to his
family and friends.' As he had killed all
the members of his immediate family hit
conduct must have surprised them, es
pecially his wife." Indianapolis Sentinel.
The Fall.
Now cooler winds nejrin to blow.
The soisr fires less fiercely glow.
The heated term is nearly o'er.
The paper collar wilu uo more.
The girl puts up ber bathing suit.
Their bats of straw the wealthy shoot
Tbe fat man laughs aloud with glee,
No more tike melted lard Is he.
The yachts am fast at wharves and docks.
We're near the autumnal equinox.
And people who regard their health
For autumn clothing spend their wealth.
And every merchant who Is wise
Doth hump hluMdr and advertise.
Boston Courier.
Phynleo-Firosnclal Scheme.
"Look here," said Grab Dinger to Slopeigh,
"when are you going to pay me that hundrwl
dollars you borrowed about eight years ago?"
"Do you mean to say that I owe you a hun
dred dollars!"
"To be sure. You certainly haven't for
gotten it."
"My dear sir, 1 do not doubt that you
loaned a hundred dollars to some one eight
years ago; but 1 can demonstrate by science
that 1 am not the man."
"I'd iilce to see how the mischief you are
going to do it."
Very well. It is a fact demonstrated by
scientists that men undergo an entire change
Of being every seven years; consequently I
can't be the same person to whom your money
was loaned." merchant Traveler.
A Tiger Beats a Lion,
It is popularly supposed that the lion is
the most courageous und powerful of the
carnivora, or at least of tbe felidsj, but on
the few recorded occasions of a battle royal
between the lion and the Bengal tiger the
lion has come off second best. One such
combat occurred recently at tbe Calcutta
Zoo between an African lioness and a
tigress. They are exhibited in adjoining
compartments of the aame cage, and the
door having been carelessly opened between
the two compartments the tigress rushed
in and disposed of ber rival in a fight which
lasted about ten minutes. Forest and
Stream,
The Way Oftentimes.
"Hello, old boyt" said Mr. Wicks.
"Where're you going now?"
"I'm going to tbe hotel to get my din
ner," answered Mr. Hicks.
"Indeed! Why don't you dine at home
I always beard that Mrs. Hicks was an ex
cellent cook."
. "Ah, my dear fellow, that was before
be bought a cook book," Boston Tran
script. r.-f
Just In Time.
An Irish gentleman getting upon a street
oar found one place vacant, which be pro
ceeded to occupy.
"Sure," said be, with a twinkle in bis
eye, "I came just in the nick of time."
"How is that?"
"Arrah! If I was to come now, I shouldn't
And a seat in the carl" Youth's Compan
ion. De Mortals Nihil Nisi Bonum.
Necrologist What is there to aay about
old Dornale; he was In tbe legislature for a
time, wasn't hef
Editor Yes; but there is no use hurting
the family's feelings! Pock.
Frigga, from whom Friday is derived,
was either a god or a goddess, according to
time and country. Aa a man he was a
gnat hunter and warrior, always repre
sented with a drawn sword in one band
and a bow in the other. In the Scandina
vian countries Frigga was called the
"Venus of the North," and the sixth day
of the week was consecrated to her wor
ibip.
'GOING HOME."
Aweary with the weight of years,
Worn wilh tho forceful waves of time,
A mind aclond anil vrandoriug feet
Went forlh with childlike faith sublime,
Tollml tho haunts of childhood days
Still held by memory's leniithenlug chain,
These wandering foot went nut to search
For old lime hones and haunto again;
The post anew In thought had corns.
Bringing to uitml an old time home.
But, ah, that home had nut away.
Those hones and haunts wore now no more:
Whilo forms and faces of nast years
Had reached full soou tho "shining shore,"
The weary soul renewed Its streugth,
Waiting a summons soon to come -From
him who knoweth when to call
Hla weary piUrrlms to his home,
To realms of everlastlug day, 1
Where memories never fade away.
While farewells hero and greetings there
Had only then been freshly made,
Another call carao to that home
And was most cheerfully obeyed;
A ferryman grim canto quickly back
Across death's ceaseless swelling tide. '
To carry forth tho one bereft,
For meeting on tho other side
Tho bride of years threescore and more,
At home, together, forever more.
-rJohn Wentworth.
Only a Piece of Chalk.
Few people know what a wonderful ob
ject a bit of chulk is when examined under
a microscope. Take your knife blade and
acrapeoff a little of the loose powder, catob
it on a clean glass slide, aud place this on
the stage of a good table microscope. Use
a quarter-inch objective leuaand illumi
nate the field with a cone of light from the
concave side of the reflector. The powder
will ue seen to consist of a confused mass
of beautiful tiny shells, many of them of
the most curious form.
A better way, however, Is to rub down a
portion of chalk with an old toothbrush in
a tumbler half filled with water. If you
desire to pre pure several slides rub on
about a teaspoon f ul of the powder. Shake
the turn ber briskly, allow the sediment to
settle for a moment and then carefully
pour off the milky looking water.
Repeat this until the water remains
clear, and you will then have left in the
bottom only perfect shells, or targe parte
of shells. Take up a smalt pinch of this
deposit, spread it carefully over the center
of a glass slide. Dry over a lump, and, if
you wish to preserve the slide for future
use, mount it in Canada balsam, pressing
out the bubbles of air beneath the cover
glass. If only intended for present ex
amination you may omit tbe mounting.
Macon Telegraph.
The Honest New?, ,
Fair dealing is a characteristic of tbe
typical New York newsboy. Some men
would hesitate to give him a quarter to
take around the corner to get elutnged, but
persons who have carefully observed the
distinguishing traits of the newsboy would
have no such fear. Wednesday afternoon
a gentleman bought four cents' worth of
newspapers in Park row from a small boy
whom he had never before seen. He ten
dered a ten cent piece In payment, and tho
boy, muttering something about "no
change," clasped the coin in . his dirty flat
and darted down the street. White wait
ing unconcernedly for bis change the gen
tleman was accosted by a friend, who in
vited him into an adjacent art gallery.
When they came out the purchaser of the)
newspapers bad forgotten all about bis
change and went his way without it Tbe
following day, as be wan passing through
Park row, be was stopped by a newaboy,
who brusquely remarked: "Say, mister,
why didn't yer wait fer yer change yester
day? Here's yer six cents." New ork
Times,
Self ftetUfled.
Schopenhauer, the great German phil
osopher, afforded one of the most remark
able examples of self complacency than has
ever been known. His uuive eutogiumson
bis own productions are almost beyond) be
lief. In writing to hia publishers of bis work
he says, "Its worth ucd importance are o
great that 1 do not venture to express it,
even toward you, because you could not
believe- me," and he proceeds to quote a
review "which speaks of me wi th the high
est praise, m the greatest philosopher of
the age, which is really saying much less
than, the good man thinks."
"Sir," he said to an unoffending stran
ger who watched him across a table d'hote,
where-he acted the purtof the local "lion"
habitually, "Sir, you are evidently aston
ished at my appetite. True, I eat three
times as much as you, but then I have
three times as much mindl" Youth's
Companion.
Originality's Patron,
A woman entered tbe office of a largo
wholesale house, and addressing a man whom
she found seated at a desk, said;
"My kind sir, I am forced to solicit assist
ance. I am a widow, have lost my situa
tion, and have dependent on me"
"A large family," suggested the man as he
turned and looked at the woman.
No,eir,only-ue-hi V
Y iat!" toe u.nerchiuied, almost tpring
L.z from bis chair.
"I have only one child," tbe wsman re
peated. ,
"Is it possible?" said tbe man,, speaking
with an emphasis of doubt, "that you have
not a large family?"
"I have stated tbe truth, sir."
"Come, now; haven't you really as many
as six children?"
"I tell you that 1 have only one. Why do
you doubt my word?"
"Because you aro so original Every other
woman who has ever appealed to me for
eharity has had at least five children to tup
port. Madam, you appeal to me deeply. X
am known as the patron of originality. Bo
seated, please, and I will write you a check.
Arkausaw Traveler. .
When Queen Victoria name to be roar
ried there was a rare gathering up of lace
workers to supply her bridal dress and veil, .
Wwlrlh.tf iMMffHi lw,Prli.M.rktdH, k. J
wives and now her granddaughters bos
since put much money in the pockets of
mvt inajosby a luytu suujecw.
The number eight is the first cubic num
ber, but aside from that possesses no pecul
iarities. There are eight beatitudes, and
sight persons ooiutittite a set in dancing a
quadrille.
fio Wasn't Idle,
"Von don't np;ienr to bavo murfi to tay
This morning, iin AicUliuiis, romuritou tua
landlady,
"No, urn'tun," mid tlio titvmlcr, riling hla
cnitovigoniaciyon tho wtirmod over atoair,
"I'm not doitifi; much talb, but I keep on
sawing wood, ma'am, just us uuruV1 Culcags
'tribune,
Not Attractive.
"What ever ponesstd you, Ruth, to let
Mr. Spinner go out in tlilm under shower!
He might be ntmck by tight jr?'
"Ob, I tbhiK there's nodai he not at
tractive enough, you knu,.," Harper's
baaar,
A New Unenln Story,
A gentleman from the west tells this story
of Abe Liucolu, which if not new is certainly
by no means hackneyed. The gentleman
came from the section hi which Abe and
Douglas were conspicuous figures in tlw past,
and the story he tells relates to a decision
made by Mr. Lincoln as to tbe proper length
of a man's leg. As the story goes, Douglas
and a Mr. Lovejoy were at on of the haunts
in the village where they used to meet for
news and gossip, ,.uu v hile there Abe Lincoln
came in and out down, disposing of t's
lengthy limbs in somewhat awkward man
ner. They saw him coming in. and immedi
ately began a conversation in regard to
proper length of a mau's leg.
"Now," says lovjoy, "Abe's legs are
altogether too long, and yours, Douglas, I
think, are a tittle short. Let's ask Abe what
thinks of tt."
It The convei-satfon had twen carried on with
a view to Lincoln's overhearing it, and they
closed it by saying, "Abev what do you tbiuk
about itr
Mr. Lincoln bad a far away look as he sat
with one leg twiited around the other, but bo
responded to the question:
'imuiowhakf
'Why, we've been talking about th
proper length of a man's leg. We think
yours are too long, and Douglas' too short,
and we'd like to know what you think is the
projier length."
velLn8aid Mr. Lincoln. "thatVo matter
that I've never given any thought to, so of
course I may bo mlsuikeii, but my first im
pression is that a niun's leg ought to be long
enough to reach from bis body to the
gTunnd." Itiwton Truo Flag.
For
W.ddlng
Presents,
Jewelry,
Tublewsre,
Brlc-ii-Brau.
From
A.FtMsttasisier
pnrtUnd. or,
Hecarrleii
the larKwit
stock of
FINK WARK
on the
Kntire Coait,
LOWKST PRICBH
WKIHHNO
wKimiNt;
WKDi'INf
WKIHHNU
PKKHKNT4.
PWMKNTh".
PRKHKNIU
PHKKKNTU
I'KKHKNTH.
you wilt save
money
by
getting prices
T NOT rnODM THE RMHT
BICYCLE
NORTH PACiFlCfYCiE(10.
BICYCLES OF EVERY DeSCRIPTIOM.""
Ma9VI BvilWtH -pQffTtANO ORcaoM.)
"German
Syrup"
Mr. Albert Hartley of Hudson.
N. C, was taken with Pneumonia.
His brother had just died from it.
When he found his doctor could not
rally him he took one bottle of Ger
man Syrup and came out sound and
well. Mr. S. B. Gardiner, Clerk
with Druggist J. ,E. Barr, Aurora,
Texas, prevented a bad attack of
pneumonia by taking German Syrup
In time. He was in the business
and knew the danger. He used the
great remedy Boschee's German
Syrup for lung diseases.
Perfect Baby Heal
O U g 11 l 10
mean glow
ing health
throughout
childhood,
and robust
health in the
years to
come. When we see in children
tendencies to weakness, we know
they are misting the life of fovd
taken. This loss Is overcome by
Scott's Emulsion
of Cod Liver Oil, with Hypophos-
phites, a fat-food that builds up
appetite and produces flesh at a
rate that appears magical.
Almost as palatable as milk.
e ct" tit trvJo e Er1
vjic i vac i
The Timothy Hopkins
Collection of Sweet Peas
Containing twtimy.0,. UUiuiet wrutie. lonfa
fMcli.t of ,r.h fur 9i.3. or pMk.t of 111, MMU
vuriatie,, mixed, for 10 conu.
12 Carnations MMonnrwiw . Si.oo
12 Chrysanthemums () $i.oo
12 Pelargoniums motvuiii $i.oo
2 Roses llrmti, ' $1.00
All IINtf, tmtM f. poltmn plnti, fm in anil,
Flower SeedsIffi&:
Vegetable Seeds ,7,' .
Wiihiliherof above cnllectioni our lundmfflely
llluurAlad iro-ptft cauloitue hi lent frl. 'Urn n
mlmitttti to bes work ot'urt.and comnlti n rt produc
tion, In natural colon, of Ilin tweniv-otm mint ten now
ttivprMllyicoanli) n The Timothy Hopkins
Collection ol Sweet Peas.
Sherwood Hall Nursery Co.
n MANCiaco, cm.
WIFT'8 SPECIFIC
FOR renovating the
entire if stem, eliminating
all Poisons from the Blood,
whether of scrofulous or
malarial origin, this prep
aration has no equal. . .
"For eighteen mouths I had an
eating tore on my tongue, I was
treated hy best ietat fhysieiant,
tut obtained no relief; the sore
gradually grew worse. I finally
took S, S. &, end was entirely
tared after using a few bottles?
C. B. McLbmobh,
Henderson, Test,
TREATISE on Blood and Skis
Diseases mailed tree.
j, he towimr bncirir Co.,
Atlanta, Gfc
FULL
An ymi getlf ir
It st your usual
trading plsce?
Try u stiff rom
)iru, Hund 7ft
wnto stid IK
VALUE
onl lor posts in
ru 1 j((rt pair ii
iiHr Lace Cur
I aim; thoy sro
no mi turn s,
three yards lotwt,
tnpdilflf nd bottom. Our Hprlnit Catalogue
In now rendy. It si vet sll the iirnv nrliw lor
uow gimiii, We will sotid H lor the stKiug,
Olds&King
PORTLAND, OR.
FISHING TACKLE
-FOH-
Rods, Reels, Lines, Hooks, Leaders
Etc, of the Finest Quality.
-SKNI) TO-
THE K. T. HUDSON MS CO.,
93 First St., Portland, Or.
9 Bend lor c-ttttloguo.
IRRIGATION MINING.
Pulscmeter Steam.
PUMP.
RM snd oheaiMjat wntw levator
known. L. A. PORTER, Mgr.,
LwUt. Idaho.
FRAZER AXLE
Best tntheWorld!
Get the Genuine!
Sold Everywhere!
GREASE
INVALID GOODS.
Holllm
Clulro (
itocllnlnc ,
l;ii.lr, 1
Buk Mob
JommoM.
Henri for Ciulogu..
W.,SUltiMntWS1,S,f
rplaul
Ferry's
Seeds
AMfl rMn a Huh
hurrett, Tlieynre Always wllshls,'
always lodtmiiiirl.alwtiya tlw best
fFERRY'SSEED ANNUAL!
Far lHfKft n InvaliiHhln to vry Planter. I
i luiwiUMiuii iruiji lUtf UiKllWLUlUUUrlUlJCL. J
.D.M.FEHRVA. DETROIT.,
HAVE
YOU
GOT
PILES
XTOHTOO PILES known by tuolatof
Itko periptrailuii, OAuso Interne IUjIiIij
ythcu warm, Thl form ami BUJ''tt
SLE&DINU or PnOTaUDiMO PUiSsi
YIKM) ATONCH TO
no Dn.cauuri'0 on c ocuenv
whlnh aau dlreotl; on paru fefi'ootMl,
absorb tumor, altaynltaliliig.otroatlnf
yoniwi-'Ubuuru. 4TIUU "MJO. .wrUKginiR
Piso'B Itomsdr for Catarrh Is Uu
Bwrt, Kaiitat to ITne, and Cheapent
Mold by druggists or wut by uuUL j
Ma. XL T. Ham I tin. Wiim. Pa.
N. F. N. V. No. 486-8. t. N. U. Nq. 608