DUNCSR DISGUSTED. Cart Fails to eatcfc Oa to th Trteks el Amertraa Politic. "Well, what's the matter with you?" queried Serjeant Bendall as Carl Dun tier limped into the station, house the other day and flung1 himself down on the nearest chair. 'Sergeant, I vhas hare to bid you good-bye." "No!"' "I vhas going back to Sheimany." "I declare! What put that into your head?" 'I vhas stsok und tired. I can't un derstand dese peoples. Nopody vhas two times alike in America." -cut you torn me you were going to run for alderman, and that you had caught on to American politics." "Dot vhaa my troubles. I belief I know all aboudt her, but I know noth ings. I vhaa going to run for alder mans. I promise dot hay scales to feefty men. I promise twenty men dot dey shall be janitor of der City HalL I promised more as one hoonered fel- Acta Ulli Ut J C i i l 1 i I IX 1U1 fcU7 V. A l J 1V1 three dollars a day." "That" was right That's the way most of the candidates do." "Tea, but I don't understand. Three days ago a feller cornea in my place nd says vhas I Carl Dunder? I vhas. Did you promise dot eastern hay scales to my bradder if he wote fer you? I did. Und did you promise her to more ash twenty odder fellers, too? I did. Vhell, you vhas a fraud und a liar, und now you take dot on der nose! Und he gits me sooch a thump dot I see more ash feefty stars Hying aroundt. How does it come dot some Americans can work dot dodge und be all right?" "Well?" "Vhell, I told you der odder day dot I promise more ash feefty men dot dey shall be engineer of the City Hall if dey wote for me. In cornea a man in my place mit his hat on his ear und eays vhas I Carl Dunder? I vhas. Vhas you going to run for some alder- mans? I vhas. Did you promise all my crowd dot each one of us should run der engines mit der City Hall? 1 did. Den, Sergeant, he gifs me sooch a blow on my mouth dot I can t eal meat for sees months, und vhen he goes avhay he says dot forty-nine more fellers vhaa to come after him. Some American candidates can promise dot shop to one hoonered fellers und be all right. How vhas she?" , "I don't know." "Und pooty queek a feller comes in my plaee und says vhas I dot oldt Dutehmans who vhants to be an alder man? I vhas. If I vhaa elected he shall get all der paving shobs und makes lots of money. He calls me a .liac und says I promise dot same thing more ash two hoonered times, und he mops me on my floor und goes avhay like a lark. If it vhaa some American candidate he vhaa all peaches. How vhas she?" ; "I don't know." "Vhell, eafery day somepody eoinei und calls me a liar und says I should be kicked. Eafery day comes soma feller mit his hat on his ear und charges me mit holding him oop for a sucker. My boy Shake vhas scart avhay, my wife vhas seek abed und I haf to lock up my place or be kilt." ; "It's sad lines," mused the sergeant "Und so I guess I shall go back t Shermany. In dot country I vhas all right If a man spreckens to me in Dutch I know vhat he vhas. If h hpeaks to me in Yankee may be h makes a fool of me. I like to go by dot Common Council and be a great man, but I can't stand sooch a racket I vhas a good enough liar, but I lea something else out all der while und der dear peoples tumbles to me. Fare well, sergeant You vhas always twe times alike, und I shall feel good by you when I am far avhay. If you meet some odder Dutehmans sbust spheak mit him und tell him to keep out of dose politics." Detroit JFrci iVess. A Few Fashion Notes. tor nail-mourning brooches are pansies of lusterless black enamel with a diamond center. Linked sleeve-buttons are seen re sembling coupled coffee beans. Ont will be silver, the other a copper tint a third gold and a fourth oxidized silver. Ivory salad spoons and forks are elaborately carved and stained verj dark. The edelweiss, with its thick furry petals and centers of pearls is th latest flower brooch. Earrings in form of stirrups, on Bide.set with diamonds, the other witt sapphires, are a novelty. For table ware the prettiest article are silver and cut glass in combination. Curses' aprons of white lawn have two broad widths that almost meet be hind, and are trimmed with rows o) insertion and tucks above a hem. The cap of white muslin has an Alsacian bow of embroidery, or else loops ol colored ribbon are around the crown. Those worn by foster-mother or wet nurse have ribbon ends that hang be hind almost to the edge of her dress skirts. A ball ofcut6teel mounted on a stem of black enamel is a favorite hat-pin. X. Y. World. Analysis ot natural gas shows the proportion of each constituent in 100 parts of the gas to be as follows: Car bolic acid and carbonic oxide, 6-10 each; oxygen, 8-10; defiant gas, 1; ethylic hydride, 5; marsh gas, 67; hy drogen, 22; nitrogen. S. - The hand-made time pieces of the Swiss and French, who have so Ion? held the supremacy as clockmakers, are not now regarded aa superior to those of American machine make.' TheAmer- can macnine-maae watcn is as nmsneq and accurate as its foreign competitor, and is, of course, vastly cheaper. PeddTerYto boy) "Is your ma in, sonnv?" Bov "Yes, ma's in. What cher got? Ribbon, fixin's an' things. Peddlor "Yep." "Ma'll be glad to look at 'em. There was a peddler here last week for two hours an' a half. Peddler "Did your ma buy much?" lioy "Shfl didn't buy any thin'. She never buy- of peddlers; but ma's a kind-hearted woman, an is always willin to look. Come in. Don't be 'fraid of the dog he's just had some meat" But the peddler was evidently atraid of the dog. Golden Day. Taking the Safe Side. Mother-i law (who is going home after a visit -ef six months) "Have w plenty ol time, Witherspoon? I "mustn't gef left" Mr. Witherspoon (dubiously) "Well, it's ten minutes' walk to th station, and the train will leave Is about an hour and a half. To be oi i cn.fo' eirlA- ? think Wfi had battel Start at once." X. Y. Tribune HIS MASTER-PIECE. Mrs J rianen F'tanaran Got Threo Hun- dren und Trifty Dollar for Kleren. This is the ago of barn-door art that kind of art which represents a powder horn, a rabbit mid u lot of other things hanging against a barn door in such a way that no one would suppose they were painted at nil, but were really hung there. Over such a picture some people go wild with joy. The naturalness of a nail-head, or the folds in a felt hat carry them away, and make them feel better satished with themselves and every thing else. Flanagan Flanagan had painted many a landscape, to which he conveyed the subtle impressions made upon him by nature. You could feel the crimson leagues of calm in his twilight marlue as keenly as you could the musical rustle of his silver birches. But so great was the rage for photo graphic painting that Flanagan Flana gan, In spite of hia self-respect and pro fessional pride, felt that he would for once have . to give the public what it wanted, because he was in need of the ever potent shekels of silver that en able a man to step out into the gloam ing through the front door, without stumbling over the wolf. So Flanagan Flanagan sent a canvas, representing an old one-dollar bill slightly crumpled, to a well-known an nual exhibition. The papers began to rave over it In half-column notices." People who went to the exhibition stood and looked at this canvas, as they looked at no other. "How natural the eyebrows of Washington look," said one enthusi astic young lady; "and the lace ou his collar is just perfectly lovely T "I never saw any thing like that be fore," said abald man, who looked first at the canvas and then at a one-dollar bill which he held in his hand; "now that's what I call painting." And so it was with every one. One would become entranced with the hair lines, and another over the signature ot the Secretary of the Treasury in the lower corner. After a while it was so much talked about that it was considered the proper thing to see, if only to be in fashion. Flanagan Flanagan ran the price up until it reached three hundred and fifty dollars, and it was nip-and-tuck between three bar-rooms, four prune merchants and several capitalists to see who should secure the prize. There is nothing like barn-door art for the United States of Chicago," said Flanagan Flanagan to a brother painter at the fifty cent table d'hote a day or two later: "they don t want the 'Keene Valley, or the 'Murmurous Megallo- way,' or "Near Gloucester,' or 'Twi light's Soothing Hush, or any thing that breathes nature in every line. They want pictures of beer bottles hang ing oa antlers, or any old vest painted in such a way that the buttons look as though they were about to fall off. They will go wild over a neatly painted grease spot on the lapel, or a buckle showing the steel throh the japan ning. After awhile, instead of visiting Milford or the coast of Maine in sum mer, we shall all be making studies for future triumphs in old junk shops and second-hand clothing stores. The banjo is our national instrument, and we must paint to suit banjo people." - "But did it not cost you a good deal of patience?" inquired his friend. Not bit," replied Flanagan: "it only cost me ten dollars for the frame, stretcher and all. The one dollar bill was a genuine one, ingeniously stuck on the background of gray paint. That's how I got three hundred and fifty dol lars for eleven. Puck. IN CASE OF FIRE. Bow It May H ConBaed to a Slngie Room for Some Time. In a lecture before the Society of Arts, London, Mr. A. W. C Ohean ga-e the following concise and simple directions how to act on the occurrence of fires. Fire requires -air; therefore on its appearance every effort should be made to exclude air; shut all doors and windows. By this means fire may be confined to a single ioom for a suffi cient period to enable all the inmates to be aroused and esipe; but if the doors and windows are thtsjvs open, the fanning of the wind ai.d draught will instantly cause the flames to in crease with extraordinary rapidity. In a room a table cloth can be so used as to smother a large sheet of flame and a cushion may serve to beat it out; a coat or any thing similar may be used with an equally successful result A wet silk handkerchief tied over the eyes and nose will make breathing possible in the midst of much smoke, and a blanket wetted aud wrapped around the body will enable a person to pass through a sheet of flame in comparative safety. Should a lady's dress catch fire, let the wearer at once lie down. Rolling may extinguish the fire, but if not any thing (woolen pre ferred) wrapped tightly round will ef fect the desired purpose. A burn be comes less painful the moment air is excluded from it For simple burns, oil or the white of egg can be used. One part of carbolic acid to six parts of olive oil is found to be invaluable in most cases, slight oF severe, and the first layer of lint should not be removed till the cure is complete, but saturated by the application of fresh outward layers from time to time. Linen rag, soaked in a mixture of equal parts of lime water and linseed oil, also form a good dressing. Common whiting is very good, applied wet and continually dampened with a sponge. Philadelphia Press. A young lady recently returned from boarding-school, being asked at table if she would take some more cabbage, replied: "By no means, madam; gastronoinical safety admon ishes me that I have arrived at the ultimate of culinary deglutition con sistent with the code of Esculapius." m m m One of them was just coming out of the post-office; the other was going in. . They stopped, shook hands, smiled, and the first one observed: "Quite a swell affair, that of Smith's." "Indeed! What was it?" "A boil." And then they separated without shak ing hands. Husband (who has advertised for a typewriter expert) "Did many call to-day, my dear, in answer to the ad vertisement?" Wife "Yes, quite a number; but there was only one appli cant whom I told to call again. Ho seems bright, and I'm sura you will like him." Husband "What was the trouble with the rest?" Wife "They were all young women." X. Y. Sun. Landlady (delightedly, to new boarder) "I must congratulate you, Mr. Byseps, on your ability as a car ver. You dismembered that chicken beautifully." Mr. Byseps "Thanks. I deserve no special credit I'm a stonecutter." Pittsburgh Bulletin. PUNGENT PARAGRAPHS. A fisherman will always bo f rtn 1 reeling a great deal when the flxhtri;? U good. Perhaps It Is tho bait. Boston Post. Husband "You arc not tho cook my motheruse to bo, my dear.' Wife "No, John, fortunately. You musu't forget that your father died of dyspep sia." Texas Riflings. If a man knew as much when he is sober na he thinks he does when drunk, Solomon's sayings would be nowhere compared with his wisdom. Spring field Union. Somo pirls go to boarding-sHWol to learn how to board. When graduated they marry and do not keep house. A few housekeeping and finishing schools would be useful. X. O. Picayune. "Your singing Is delightful. Miss Ethel," said Mr. Bore. "It fairly cur ries me away." "Indeed," returned Miss Ethel, with a yearning glanco at the clock, "I hadn't noticed It." A Philadelphia paper, in an article on household economy, asked: "Is there a wife in this city to-day that makes her husband's shirts?" The following answer was received by re turn mail: "I do, but he won't wear 'em." An Independent is a man who leaves the other party to join our party. A renegade ia a man who leaves our party to join the other. An offensive: partisan is a man who belongs to the other party and sticks to it Boston Transcript. "Yes," said a lecturer in a country town to a large and intelligent audi ence, "the people of the United States owe more to the newspapers than to any other cause for their advance ment" And the editor remarked pa renthetically and pathetically: "You bet they do if subscribers elsewhere are any thing like mine." Washington Critic. Chicago man "Ah. ah! Lost some more money through a Boston firm! I'm not surprised. Now, you have large dealings in Chicago, aud some folks say Chicago business men are tricky. Did you ever lose anything through a Chicago firm?" Philadelphia man "N-o, 1 never did." "Hoopla! I know it. Never lost a cent there, did you?' "No. In dealing with Chicago men I have Invariably demanded cak in advance." Philcuielphiix Record. "Whv, Mrs. Hiishhouse, vou sur prise me; I never saw wine cu your table before. Is it to be a regular at tribute of your dinner service?'' 44 Well, reallv, Mr. Slowpay, I can hardly promise you that. Yon see, I have an idea that wine, if chosen to fit an emer gency, may stimulate iu a special direc tion." "Ah, yea, I see. Then you think I need stimulating? Very thoughtful of you, indeed. And this wine you have chosen for me is a a Bordeaux?'' "Freeisely, board-owe, Mr. Slowpay. Do you absorb?" Yonkers Oazcltc STRANGE DISCOVERIES. Tho Tomb of Macloe ap GryflyddDtarlor, a Grrat Welsh Warrior. Great interest haa been excited in North Wales by the announcement that the tomb of Madoe ap Gryffyddmaelor, a great Welsh warrior in the eleventh and twelfth centuries, grandson of Owen Gwynedd, Prince of Wales, had been discovered in the ruins of Walle Crucis abbey, Llangollen. Rev. II. T. Owen, warden of the abbey, who is now engaged upon some excavations, was searching for old stained glass in the dormitory, when he disinterred a large stone slab bearing the name of Madoe and an inscription which has not yet been fully deciphered. Down the cen ter of the stone is an incised sword in sheath. Further excavations led to the discovery of four other stones, each about five feet by eighteen inches; two bear fiorated crosses, one an inscribed spear, and the other a Grecian orna ment. The stones form part of the vaulting of the corridor leading to the old burial-ground of the monks. The warrior founded the abbey, which was a Cistercian monastery, about the year 1200. After the venerable building be came a ruin, the chapter-houe and scriptorium were used for several gen erations as a farmstead, and were prac tically destroyed by fire. During the repairs it Is conjectured that the stones of Madoc's tomb were used to coinpl4" the vaulting. In 18C1 the debris cover ing the area of the abbey was removed by Lord Dungannou, and the tombs of benefactors buried in front of tho high altar, the figure of a knight in chain armor, and a stone coffin, were laid bare. During the excavations of last year the monk's well and spring were discovered. A. Y. Tribune. He Was a Clam, Sure Enough. "Laura,'" exclaimed the youth, as he laid his arm timidly on the back of her chair, "now that you have promised to be mine it smeiy does not seem like asking too much if I " "Well. George?" George took her hand in his, swal lowed once or tw ice spasmodically, and proceeded : "As your affianced husband, Laura, whom you will some day promise in tho sight of high Heaven to love, honor. and er cherish, you will not think me presuming, dearest, I hope, if if " "Well, George?" 44 If I venture to claim the privi lege of a k of u kiss!" The lovely maiden laid her head trustingly on the young man's shoulder, a tender light shone in her dreamy eyes, and her fragrant breath swept the cheek of the rapturous lover as she softly murmured: "George, don"t be a ciam!" Chicago Tribune. HOW NATIONS SALUTE. Egyptians greet one another with the re mark: "How goes tho perspiration" The Moor salutes by riding up at full gal lop and firing a pistol over your head. In Germany to pass a stranger on the road without greeting him is considered very im polite. The Malays and other Polynesians, sal ate by smelling. This is performed by rubbing noses. In France every man, no matter what bis ctation, if he be a coal heaver, lifts his hat to another. The Chinese have a regular code of saluta tions, eight ia number, according to the in dividual. The Japanese show respect by bending the knee, though in the street they only make a feint of so doing. In India the Buddhists salute by lowering the palin of the right hand and bringing it up toward the face, at the same time saying, "Ram, ram chair." , A former resident of Sew Zealand says that on meeting after a long absence two Maories seize hands and rubj noses violently, at the same time loudly, weeping, presumably SOME ROYAL' DIVORCES. A French, an Ktig-tlsh and a Rrrman Cms In Oar Own t'ontnry. The ease of the unfortunato Queen Natalie does not stand alonn in the history of royul ladies. In our own century there have bcen three royal divorces, but, perhaps, the Jot of none of them was so painful as that of the young Queen. The first sovereign who was divorced from his wlfo was Napo leon I. Ho abandoned Josophlno Bonu harnais in order to ninrry the Arch duchess Maria Louisa, of Austria. As thero was no real cause for the dlvorca it w as put forward on bohalf of tho Emperor that the marrlago was cele brated by a Republican priest only. and. therefore, it was not valid ac cording to tho church of Homo. Tho excuse was u very weak one, and, in deed, quite absurd, as the Fope, at tho conclusion of the concordat had given a dispemtatio a radieo to all marriages celebrated since 1789; but the Emper or's wish was at tho time the supremo law for the Episcopal consistory in Paris, and the divorce was granted on the payment of n certain fiao "accord ing to tho moans" of the parties. Tho most notorious royal divorce case lu recent English history Is, of course, that of Goorgo IV., of England, who wanted to get rid of his wife, the poor Princess Caroline, from whom he had lived separate for many years. A bill was introduced into Parliament for the purpose, and was strenuously opposed on behalf of the Queen by Henry Brougham, afterward lortl Brougham and Yaux, Lord Chancellor of Great Britain, and Thomas Dcnmnn, after ward Lord Denman. Li.;d Chief Justice of England. What these two counsel said against tho King would be enough to get 300 counsel in prison ou the continent and make judges faint. The bill was allowed by a small majority to bo read a second time, but public opinion was so much against it that the Jovernment thought it better to withdraw it aftr the third reading. So tho King's wish was not carried out. and the whole scandal was iu vain. The poor Queen died a few weeks after her accession, but the King never married r.gain. Crown Prince William, of Wurtetnberg, the father of the present King Charles, of Wurteniberg. was compelled, in 1808, by Napoleon I. to marry the Princesa Caroline Augusta of Bavaria. The maii-iaga was celebrated on June 8, but the young couple separated the very same day and never again saw eai-h other. I n 1814 they were dlvoived, and the Princess two years afterwards married Francis I., Emperor of Austria, and 1325 was crowned Queen of Hungary. Pall Mall Unzcttc. SUDDEN HOSPITALITY. How Two Tramp Clot a Square Meal Without Atkins; for It. A couple of tramps stopped at a farm-house in West Tennessee during the yellow fever season. "You can eomo in and drink all the water you want" said the farmer, "but you neenter ask for any thing to cat for you won't get it." The tramps looked at a table that had just been set for dinner, and tighetl. 44 Vou neenter sigh," said the farmer, "fur you don't git a bite of that grub. W'y, we've got 'possum, don't you see; sweet potatoes, b'iled ham, curly mustard greens aud three kinds of bread. I wouldn't twit you fellers, but the last tramp that come along here stole the only good set of harness on the place." Don't put yourself to any uneasi ness on our account," replied one of the tramps, "for we ain't hungry." "Not hungry!" the farmer " ex claimed. "No: all we want ia a place to sit down in the shade." 44 Wall, this is the first time I ever heerd of tramps not being hungry." It's sorter rare with us, I can tell you. I'm sorter feverish, myself. Don't exactly understand it, for I never was this way before. Oh, I have had slight bilious attacks, but I never !:r.d such pain in the back of my neck l.-ofiAe. Just before leaving Jackson ville " A sudden scuffling In the room caused the trump to break off his nar ration. The skirts of the farmer's wife Happed against the gate, aud an old man lost his hat us he leaped into the road. The two tramps moved their chairs up to the table. "The hospitality of this neighbor hood," one of them remarked, "has found a plaee in romance and verse." "Ves," the other one replied, "and the peculiar charm about it is its ex treme suddenness." Arkansaw Trav eler. Something Good in Store. A big man rushed at a little man at the ferry dock the other day and ex L'laimed: "11a! Now I've got you. I'm going to knK'k the top of your head off." "Come on and try it," replied the Utile man as ho got into position. "You slandered me," shouted tho big man as he backed oiT a little. "What of it?" "You've got to take it back or get licked! I'll give you I'll give you one week to take it back, and if you dou'l ao it I'll- " "What!" cried the little man as ho advanced upon him. "I'll perhaps extend the time, but you've got to tako itJLtack." Hold on vmit!" shouted the litf.lo man as he got his coat oft, but the b'g man waved his hand ncid ran aboard the bout to cull back: "Two weeks and not another da! llien prepare to get mauled!" Dttroit Free Press. The electric light station at Bath, Me., is burning sawdust in the furnaces there with satisfactory results. Flour of sulphur has proved to be an effi cient preventive against the ravtgss sf car pet bugs or buffalo moths. Sweet oil and putty powder, followed by soap and water, are efficient means for brightening brass and copper. The progress of -saccharine is becoming a matter cf attention for the French govern ment A good quality of sugar is made in France out of turnips. Pyrodene is a new liquid which renders wood textile fabrics, paper and other tsJSammable materials fireproof. As a paint for wood it is a special success, as it does not blister in the sun. Take a small quantity of a S per cent car bolic acid solution and sprinkle sheets, cover let, pillow assl bolster, on both sides, the edges rt bed curtains and the wall next the bed. - The face and neck may also be slightly wetted with the solution. Not a single gnat or musquito will come near. In France very practical use of photog raphy has recently been made. Several per sons were imprisoned by the caving in of a well A hole was bored, and down this a tube with a camera ivas slid. The photo graph showed the faces of some of the de ceased, and demonstrated the nselesgnesa of efforts at rescue. A man living near BanU Crua ha been catching quail in a peculiar way. For three weeks he has; been spread ing grain iu the road near hia place, where the quail abound. Oa tho djiy the law was out 1o put wheat in thw pliico aa usual, but had previous! v soaked the wheat iu whisky. Watch ing the place, he haw tho quail come out, cat, get drunk, and in a short time ho down etupifieu. He thn went to them and gathered about one hundred in a sack that he curried with him. A few that were not fully drunk were caught by hia dog. He lias practiced tho same method since suc cessfully. A YAI.ITABLK MEIUCALTRKATISK. The Utlon for 1W9 of the Marlins Medloul Annnal. known Uont'ltpr's Almausr. is now rvarty, und may lie obtained, free of cost, of flmgKNto nd Ki'iK'rnl conntr deali'rs iu all fart of the rnltd states, Mexico, and Inrtood n every civilised portion of the WenU-rn Hemi sphere. The Alinauae has been Itemed regularly at the commencement of eery year for ovut one-fourth of a rentnry. t combines, with the soundest practical advice for the preservation and rcntoratlon of hralUi, a larf;e amount of In teresting and amnsliiR ltpht rending, and the calendar, actronotnlcui caliilat!n, chronolog ical Items, etc., are ircuttcd with grent care, and will he found entirely accurate. The issue of Hostetter'a Almanac for will probably be the larpest edltlou of a medical work ever pab- nsncd in any country, i ne proprietors, Messrs. Hoatetter & t-o.. I'ittsbnnrh. Pa., on receipt of a two cent stamp, will forward a copy by mall to anv person who cannot procure one In hi ueignDoruooa. Camohenc nd sand will remove nalnt spots from glass. Whit Elephant of Slam. Lion of Eng land, Drajron of China, Cross of Swltr-er, land. Banner of Persia, Crescent ot Kgy pt- louble l.oale of KUHKia. btar ol Chili. I be Circle of Japan, Harp of Erin. To set these Duy a box ol tne genuine Dr. C. McKake's Ceibbiiatko Livkh Pii.I.h. price & cent, and mail us the out- klde wrapper with your address, plainly written, aud 4 cents In stamua. We will then mail vou the above list with an ele gant package ol oieoRrapnic ana euro- matte cams. FLKM1NO BttOS., PlTTSBUKO, I A. A crust of stale bread will remove snola from wall paper. lTe the rreat soeclfle for "cold In bead" and eatarrti nr. stage s i; alarm tieineoy. The Bohemian element is rapidly multiplying In ew or city. A 'narh. fold or More Throat should not be neglected. "iJroum- hroitrhiil Trtx-ner are a simple remeay, inn give immw late relief. IMd cnfy bare. Bolivia declared its Independence In 1M4. nONUEBHX I'O PI" LA It ITT. The fact that the ale of Dr. Pierce's Pleasant Pursatlve Pellets excels that of any other pi!! in the market, he It great or small. Is on account nf f u.-t tliat Ihpr An. tiiiv litflr s mmr-COM tc1 ? minutes. andthat lu most i-ases one little "l'el ef Is sutllrlt-ut lor a dose: that they are purely veKetuole ann iM'rlfciiy tjarmuss; ana ior con stipation, biHousiiLiw, sii-k headache, and all disease arising from d.-rangi-ment of the liver, stomach or bowels, they are aluolutely a specific. A gniitle laxative or active cathartic, aci-ordiug to the siie of dose. Glycerine does not agree with a v ry dry skin. rosstMPTios crit:i. An oM physician, retired from practloe, hav ing had placed lu his bauds by en Kast India missionary the formula of a sllr. vle vegetable remedy for the peedy und permanent cure of Consumption, Bronchitis, Catarrh, Asthma, and ail Throat ami l.nug Affections, also a posi tive ond radical cure for Serious Pebllity and all Nervous Complaints, after having tcsb-d Its wonderful curative powers lu thousands of cases, has felt it his duty to make It known to bis sam-riug fellows. Actuated by this motive and a desire to relieve humau sutlVrlng, I will send free of charjre. to all who desire It, tills re cipe. In German, Prench or English, with full directions for preparing and using. Sent by mall by addressing with stamp, naming this paper, W. A. NOYKs, iA9 Poacr t Block, jSochrt irr.X. r. Bancroft. theCailfornlahUtorlan, bas a library worth fdU.OUO. A MADMAN AT LAKGK! He Is a well-known citizen, and his nearest and dearest friends do cot suspect his Insanity. How do we happen to know about It? Listen; his appetite Is gone, he Is low-splrlted, he don-t sleep well, he has night-sweats, he is annoyed by a hacking cough. These symptoms are the forerunners of consumption and death, and yet he neglects them. Is It any wonder that we call him a madmau? If yon are his friend tell him to get a bottle of Dr. Pierce's Golden Medical Pisooverv without delay. It will cure him If he lakes It lu time. It will not miraruously create new lunirs when the old ones are nearly gon, but It will restore diseased ones to a healthy condition. TeU him about it. and warn him that In his rase delay means death. A ray of light travels 11,160,000 miles In a minute. TUT Onucu for breakfast. Us superior exeellenss proven In mil iocs of hoivesfor (ti.l.tli.ti ni.r,.. Itf . Mitu-. It ts list d I IT th? United Plate Uonnnml. Riiilotsed by U beads' of the Unat Unlreralliea u the Brroneest, Pure-t sod most Hotltorul. l)r Priw i Oram B&Ub( Powdw does bat eonUtm Ajrman!, ume or aimttv ia onjy in cans, FRICK BAKING POWMB CO. IS TOSS. OHIOASO. ST. fcOClS. FOB Asthma, Cougflin, Coldei, Croup, IsucCoagrIi. lei of Voice, InrTuicnt Consumption, and all Throat and Lang Troubles. J. R. GATES & CO., PROP'S. 41T Kansome Street, Ban Francisco, Cal. fa w si OF PURE COD LIVER OIL ANr HYPOPHOSPHITES. Almostas Palatable as Milk. 09 sUsfTMisedl that the most deHeate itis san tako it. UrmnrkaMe am a FLKSH eRODVCEIt. l'eroona OATK rap idly while taking XT. SCOTTS EMTTLSION Is acknowledged by Phy. iolans to be the FINEST and BEST preparation of Its class for the relief of CONSUMPTION, SCROFULA, GENERAL DEBILITY, Wasting Diseases of Children, and CHRONIC COUGHS. Bold by all Druggists. CALIPORWIA OBAHOI, KAIBIK aaa ISDIT LAND. 9000 acres in any size tracts. Just the plaee for a Colony. Special Inducement to settlers. Kaay terms. BIOKOR. FUII BELOVEB, lu Slsso. Oaf. t n w tt ilTa mat a V V TT IsTm two -m-m-xar' heati juasoiill V :,JCGIST3,AaDEALEnSE'VEHmHERE lir IJhaS'A'Vqgeler 10'BaitoMq Dlrmond Vera-Cura FOR DY8PEP8IA. ASS AU STOMACg TBODXUS ItTC AS! t41csttn, Soor-Stomscfc. H.srltrarm, gsa( Out Slssss. Oonattpstloa, FullosM ftitsr UI, PooS Kisiss ta U Moat ana UupmkU SsMs aasf aa. tag- KtfTMHIM snd Low-Spirits. At DrapgiM nwt Vealrrt or sent by sa( om rs en pi o 24 a. (5 bora .0U) ia stoops, txmtpls tfwl an rtcapi qf 2-eent Stamp. THI CHARLES A. V 00ELEI CO.. laitlswrs. UL AnTMlYiA CURED lueraiiui AqihmaCiiraziceraiutofnve ivt-l mUai rtlirj in t&e worst CAaeJiuniremooriit(tiVl i cio Hjoej) ; euQcmcur macro mil ouwrn lau. I t :rtxl o.fttrfnrV'i l Km mtost kxtrnl. Prtne AOr. and I I f MN,lnTJKtorby mail fUrai le i ll EK - rr,rKfn;i. i R rv tM -iiip p i n, hi. ram, jh inn. st Premiums, TS.OOOIn nti S years Eetabliithed. New psieniea 15 tool Tuning i vice, in um In no other r Piano, br which our Planes stand in tune to yean, good for 100 ; not aifected by climate. No wood to split, break, swell, shrink, crark, decay, or wear out ; we guarantee it Ele gant Rosewood Cases, S strings, double repeating action; Bnsst ivory keys; the famous ANTISEU Call er writs for Catalogue, free. T. V. A-VTLSKLL riAAU tu, Manufacturers, iraa i,!hi risii, mr, ket sod Ssvcutb Streets, bun Francisco. i 4 VJlizlv .Ua. ... THE VAN MONCISCAR PRIVATE DISPENSARY. Noo. 133 and 134 Third Street. Portland, Orejoa, Is t e only Frits W RJs- h.nu l,ln uul m . 4 t lir.i-J west Coaru fi wbrresaUcnUaresncTrss, i mi iwiw i I i- v . 'I'S, CHRoVlC ASI T iTTATR ninrmni. B r,. . . , - - " " COKSirLT.-a IOJ a?fc. OrtrMERtrS KEWBFIT AND SUSPENSORY. ( Int. i f-!. 1 1, 'aT j cures all ervocsana niroulc in- ea-eol txjtJi sexen. Frlc gift wni up'snrd. tv-tiu RirilllF. If rrjptcriHi ml iisw nir I'nmphl-t Fo. 1 11 LKA. '"W luv ti;!'.n. S.-iiJ2c soifiinr fi.rl- M. E. P03TUWC BUSWISS C0UEGE. Ferlli.ad. Oreemt. i t . i'iiinri:i, t-i u!i i'ssrrue'.ton. rjtb 1 tem t U!;i.f'r"e-'':i; rMUarl. Businetm. &Hcrta.it Comri5 rAic!d fVsrassA.?p Dw-rt-mt"'.. Wttiieiiir, Krt-Lt:irtl ;it smv 'itise. t- lujj'ie rtnrl -pei-nir, i f enui::r:shi! serif free. a. n r- rc x. . i AiiSMKIlnu.rrls. WELL DRILLS FOR EVERY PURPOSE. Sold on Trial ! InTw'mpRl fnuill, profit are. tMl SV-' fur miitnj itb fall pnrricaLsvrm. Mka af actor-? by GOULDS & AUSTIN, it a tee ika St., CHICACO. ILL. J-JAWKEYE nnwo ea u ssi r- .tt y If ak tWi .!'! of t umm at ft ltrln. A BU. by Ka4 Sorwe mw cptrmte It. No brxvj chau 9P rods to huxlhv The rrf mm m ft crrsi U 9rt fmt will pay r thm Mtscbiuc tt will mly ewt a aaf 1 car4 wa Pr mm inotrasl CstBi. ?Tlvllt prlOC, tem 9sl IgMnajgslflsA, AeMrcM taM IftUafwt'rrvra, , fiAmkSi BiLJK SU5V Bcoiea vreTe aowtw Oii.SPIflf! Dr. Spinney & Co.rJSXE. N F(7VQ lift Peollitr. toas of TIor. Sernloal " Losses, Weak Uamorr, Umpoa- dener. so., dee to excesses or abase, curea. YOUNC MEf.mHeril,ttm" the" effects SW tm M m Kit of Tonti3ui follies or iudis eretloa shoela arsil themselves ot our treatrneot. A positive eureirnaratiteed in ererr ease, Brf biln. chartres. promptly and SAlelf fcaroi MIDDLE-AGED MENEi ease of KMn-Tii or Bladrter. Weilt Baca. Kerrous Uebihty. H wiiMi of bestiuf BueoRUi, etc, cored and rsstored tn hi.-lthv vi.i-- t'B. persons nnsble to visit as may be treat at tnelr Dnrrjes. br mrrmnnniWHirw. kl a.4 (.-i . .... ree. Benjl 4 cents in stamps tue iae Vbiuia Aian'ti! 4 rlDdor oul-le to WmUoek. Tl Pti(Wiiintliiii A S2.50 PAPER FOR ONLY G1.75 - .JTbr.ZfS'f Tjr ywo debility, arnlnal 1-, J? !'I:tU eruption-. cSerts '.jiS S' i'r-&Z:J'- ' -addar rol. '.-, gannr -Sk-SWSk..A.ySfc. m si ' 1 .- i ' , 1 thCTtiTi?r- if ' 1 fll lOTlJIBKS till f !sl 8TUMF3. Wlllp.lll ,:, 1 S J J r as rdlsr Cms f " -f : 11 J Sis' i " EY Sent ttt Earvh SuhsmlhAf r Thanlraolvlna rk.l... B....,a viim.uiiu n on i car s rcasxsr. The volume for lfiSfJ will be superior to any prpvions year. It will contain Rx Rrlal Stories. ISO Shnrt Stnri. , . . , Household Articles. Tales of Adventure, lUu.tratJ SketcheJ of Travel, 1.000 A Hitrird liieS Arictek. C,VItrtM4 rj? Specimen Copies IKE YOUTH'S COMPANION, 36 Temnli .... J - . . A .4 "ct nnxioua TratchlDg. Sold av 1 8i( S ossriTM grrr r ., -; sat sstisraciion in u ami D ATS. s I cure of Qonorrtupa ard , i'" " 1 Prescrlbs It an 4 I f ael saf In recotnmaca- ! r"''7?? t" " to all sufferers. L OseiBaaaA ,3 n.... lit. PRICE- 1 .00, m tmStmti Sold br SroESUts, ! WEAK, NEnVOUS PEOPLE. us. fjoftsra Kucnto-BAO. SKTtr HKLT tKwitlrflT cvrrs KIIKl ajlTIHS.VKLaUMRA.Uf -KU, mad riumurj ei ronllliieae of both sexes. Contain 23 tntOOdoirreaiof Kleetrirttr. GtlBASTIilEB the -rorwl. efiesrwt. snrlltr pow!rfl,da. rtfeotl.fi KKDirALlXKCTSlC HKLf In the lectria fiuftoetmorle. frue with MaIs Belts. Avoid bofrns compon smb mnnr slia? s and orfti !es tmltAtloas. LCtTHlC TKCAiKS 0B HI PTtfeS, S.OOO cund. isMidituzip for 111 as t rated psmptuot. H.J. Imaasii, W1 Market Mt. H. P. Mole Frop. I'arllte Coast Xtranelt. The BTTYEB8 OT7XB2 ia iaaoed March and Sept.. each year. It la aa ency clopedia of useful infor mation for all who pur chase the luxuries1 or the necessities of life. "Wo can clothe you asd furnish yoa with all tho necessary and unnecessary appliances to ride, walk, dance, sleep, eat, fish, hunt, work, go to church, or stay at home, and in various sizes, tries and quantities, Just fiarore out what, is required to do all these" things C0MFORTASLY,.and you can make a fair estimate of the value of the BOYEB8' QUIDS, which will be sent upon receipt of lO cents to pay postage, MONTGOMERY WARD & CO. 111-11 IdUohican Arenue, Chicago, III fvDWlCHT'Sl S ODAJ THB COW BEASD. TO DELICIOUS BISCUITS latest impart robis and TV wokXn. i:i USE DlVIGIIT'S COW-BnAND SODfl-SALEOATUS. ABSOLUTELY PURE. ALWAYS UNIFORM AND FULL WEIGHT. sare that that la a pU-tura of a the best Resurrected. ' Johll BrSitrtlfilV. Iisnton Coal YarJu, S.tu Francisco, a well-known citizen, says: I was pro nounced incurable. Both feet in the graTe fronj. DyspepsiaHeart Disease and Dropsy. Three bottles of MOORE'S RE VEALED REMEDY restored me to health and put life and rigor into my debilitated system. k't ytabli ictcjjii IsHsssefaessf OVB. TBAOB MASK JVu-aners Itia I m pap tact that the Soda or Baderataa jem use ahoaM ho White and Pare same sa all similar snbstaaeee ased for food. To Insure obtaining only the "Ana at Hammer Brand Soda erBaleratua, hoy it to "poena or half poena' aortooBS, which bear onr earn and trade-mark, as Inferior foods are seme rues substituted fovthe "Arm k Hammer" brand whea bonght ia trala. gmrtlee ulna Pittnt frowder shoald remem bee that its sols rislnsT prepartT consists of m earbonate of sods. Ose tsaspooa fal of t ha "Arm a Hammer4 brand of oda or Salereros mizea with soar milk equals Packed in Card Olf BTBBt Z. T. WBIGiHT, Veet af Merrleew Street, General ADVANCE ENGINES THRESHERS AND POWEES II "t riA ' t iv:l t r t i w - v vi w vae-" I bTbTL -x.-- 1 i m J.. LmSr TaA w -; -l . .t." : ., ' . i ..f3isTsst--s a at . . . . ., ., m,w r, -,isf , i I especially request tho e contemplating parcnasiog either an Kngine or Thresher next season to look up the record of the ADVANCE. It i - he onl; machine ever sold on the Pacific Coast that has given entire, satisfaction. I also deal In Laundry Machinery, Marine Engines. AH kinds of Brass Goods, Inspirators, Injectors, Oilers, Reapers, Mowers. Chemical Fire Extinguishers, and Engines, Oils, Belting, Hose, "Wrenches, Etc. "-" --"-V d To any New Subscriber who will tend us this Slip,- with pame and P. O. address and $1.75 in Money Order, Express Money Order, Registered Letter, or Check, for a year's sub scription to the Companion, we will send the paper FREE TO JAN. 1, 18S9, l!tAfrJ.!X$Ly9r from hflt This offer Includes the ILLUSTRATED SUPPLEMENTS, the PREMIUM LIST and FOUR HOLIDAY NUMRP and Colored Announcemeat froe. PUate mention tkitjiblication. Address BverfTDrmoi " V ( Blma7Syphmtici liercarir J diseases, Bt'Y THK BEST. r.iEXjGArii THc CHEAT Cures Cut-i, Seres, SaTIii Pirrrijlea. Felons, Skin i;je -,- a V ailments for whirh a ralre it ub ' taking not soreoess anJ hpHi: jt like magic SiSceiiU abos. at all IrvviK. rr , " n.l, Gr-r, ii oiirara ijmii, loivrrjntii imJ woes of t'ft H Rftd books, hans JSt la .xu trees. , j t id-.!rcM D-M-FEnHY. CO.,na;rcit. t.i'.ch. myvvitwr ijowb. i tin ur tiiuen eefliE9in( lfn Jr swl . MBBBBVSSSBatssMsBBBBVM MAKE or WHOLESOME BREAD Com oa your package and yon trill hare foda amde. -" THE COW ESASTX xD WIGHT'S - lSAI-ERATUf frtroinlr nt Contains eofAlcohol: iwsm; Alas uiees Uon; StlmnlatM the tirer; disease. four teaspoon fals of tho best Basics PoderjaT tns teenty timsa its cost, beiidas bemsj ranch healthiar.beeaaae it does not con tola any tujarkxta sfabstaaeeo. anehaa arum, tsrraalba te., of which many Bak- " by? Powders are made Afairymea and Fannere shoBldmeoalythe'Ana -at Hammer4 brand for cleaning; asd ksepiaa MUk fans Sweet aa rh-sn , CArmow. Bee that erery ponnd packar ef "Arm aad Hammer Brand eontaias MI 1 ounces set, asd tho V pound packsgwsUI 11 in act. Soda or Balers ins same as spoat- PACKAOl i Board Boxes. Always keeps Soft.'. YfartlaacT, Orrcsa. Agent for the B ST AN J FASTEST IriRESHER IM THZ WORLD. . THE ONLY DEALER ON PACIFIC COAST That ships CARLOADS. PRICES GREATLT REDUCED AH sizes in stock from 40 " pounds to 1,2(0. Vaisi Send for REDUCED PRICKS. i Remember it is a pleasure to show -TSSSsisSp goods or answer questioitft If yoa B3sxr rAnsnt call. wtHtpl SPECIAL OFFER TO NEW SUDSCRIt3PI9fi. Illustrated WEEKLY Supplements as- scrot- T. " a w is jc ii . it laj