A Difference.
HE ASKED FOR A COT.
And He Got a Cot, or What They Call
a Cot, In Scotland.
A resident of Terre Haute was trav-
eling Ju Scotland and met a congenial
.acquaintance on the train. The new
found friend insisted that he be per
mitted to-show the Indianian the best
, hotel in the small place where they
were both stopping. When they got
to the hotel it was full. As the In
diana man was only going to stay one
night, he said be was not particular,
but would sleep any place.
It was finally agreed that he should
sleep in the hotel parlor. But the
lounge proved too hard. So he called
the porter.
“I can’t sleep on this lounge. Bring
me a-cot. will you, my boy?” he asked.
“A cot. sir? Did you say a cot, sir?”
“Yes. a cot. I can’t sleep on this."
“Did you say a cot, sir?”
She—Don’t you think Miss Screecher
“Yes. You put a cot in here for me. is-a beautiful singer?
I’m going out. but shall return pres
He— She is beautiful, all right, but I
ently."
can’t say the same of her singing.—
When on his return he opened the New York Globe.
door to what he thought was the par
lor he was amazed to find a cradle
Surprised.
near his suit case. He summoned the
porter.
“Boy. I asked you to bring: me a cot
That .is not a cot. That Is a baby’s
bed.”
“No, sir; that is a cot. sir.”
“Well, but I can’t sleep tn that
What- I want is. a pot—a- long- frame,
you know, with springs on it.” at the
same-time measuring with his hands:
“Oh. I see. sir.” replied the boy.
“You don’t want a cot. sir. What you
want is a stretcher, sir.”—Indianapolis
News.
Mike your wife or mother
a present of one of our
Combination
Kitchen
Sets
It will make her happy and
you will get results in the
better meals she will pre
pare for you in less time.
Have only a few sets left.
The Intermountain Tribune
Bert Cotton
Exclusive agent for
F‘eters Shoes
Dependon Under-
wear and Hosery
J.D. Jtistrite Corsets
Francis Simmons
Kid Gloves
Butterick
Boges Hats for men
We have Fidelity
Blue trading stamps
BERT COTTON
Lebanon,
BEARDS AND BARE FACES.
Patterns
Oregon
Shaving Was at One Time Considered
Almost a Crime.
J; H. GOINGS & SON
We need- not go so far back as the
eighteenth century to find Englishmen
who held that shaving was “agen God
and nature.” In-the nineteenth. James
Ward; R. A-., in a, “Defense of the
Beard," set forth eighteen reasons for
retaining it. mainly Scriptural, re-en-
fdfcfed by
artistic considerations
1 “What would- a Jupiter be without a
board?" As late as 1860 Thelogos pub
lished- a treatise entitled “Shaving—A
Breach-of the Sabbath and a Hindrance
to the Spread of the Gospel.” One of
his points • was that “Providence had
manifestly designed the beard as a pro
tection for the ftiroat and chest” But
what about the woman’s throat?
J
Nowhere was there more prejudice
centuries ago against beards than at
the inns of court. The “black books”
of the Inns tell us how offenders were’
fined for wearing beards, and some
times were even compulsorily shaved
by order of court And the prejudice
against the bearded barrister still
lingers. Vi<;e Chancellor Bacon carried'
his dislike to bearded or mustached1
barristers so far that he always refus
ed to bear them. Even now there are
very few leading counsel with beards,
and I can remember only one unshaved
barrister of the greatest eminence, the
late Judah Philip Benjamin, Q. C.-
silver tongued Benjamin, who wore a
mustache and a goatee. — London
Chronicle.
DEALERS IN
Wit of Beau Brummel.
Absolutely Free
We are offering the below mentioned
premiums Absolutely Free to our patrons
For every dollar purchase from our store
entitles the purchaser to one chance in our
Free Drawing to occur about March 1, 1914
We will also issue a ticket in this drawing
for every dollar paid on accounts ......
........... —-—The Prizes are——-------- ——
One set of Hack Harness
One Dresser
One Rocking Chair
One Set of Housing
Drawing takes place at 2 p; m. on date fixed
Our goods will continue to be sold at the Lowest Cash Prices
Farm Implements, Wagons, Buggies,
Harness, Plumbing Supplies
Flour, Wheat, Oats,
Ground Feed, Etc.
East Main Street
SWEET HOME, ORE.
□
J. A. THOMPSON
T. L. DUGGER.
NOTARY PUBLIC
NOTARY PUBLIC
Thompson & Dugger
Real Estate Brokers
SWEET
HOME,
OREGON *
* If you want to sell your Farm, other
lands dr City property, list them with us.
We can get you a buyer. T We manage
Transfers of Property, Write Deeds,
Mortgages, été., etc., examine Abstracts,
-------- -——Negotiable Loans-----------------
Beau Brummel’s popularity depend
ed less upon his dress than upon his
perfect self possession, his grace of
bearing, his wit. his good looks and his
good humor, according to León H. Vin
cent’s “Dandies and Men of Letters.”
He Was a handsome fellow, although
. the shape of his nose had been “modi-
fied” by the kick of a horse.
“His reputation for bright and caus-
tie sayings was very great. The in-
dustrlous biographer has collected all
he could lay hands on. and there is life
in them yet. Take, for example, this:
Byng, one of the dandies, was blessed
with a remarkable head of hair which
curled naturally. Brummel saw him
one day in a gig with a French poodle
by his side and saluted him with. ‘Ah.
Byng, how do you do?—a family ve
hicle. I see.' And from that time on.
we are told, the well haired dandy was
known as ‘Poodle Byng.’ ”
Multicolored.
“Father." said a boy. “I’ve got a pen
cil Which will write green, purple,
crimson or any color you like.” “Not
the same pencil, my son.” “You daren’t
COME IN AND SEE US.
WE DON’T WANT THE EARTH
bet me a dime it won’t, daddy!” “I’ll
give you a dime if it will.” said his fa
BUT WE DO WANT TO SELL YOU A PART OF IT
ther. The youngster dived into his
3 j pockets, produced the stump of • com
mon lead pencil and wrote on a piece
of paper the words, “green, purple,
crimson." “There, daddy, say it won’t
write any color ydu like now! Hand
over that dime.*’
Advertise in the Intermountain Tribune
Toot, Toot.
Official Directory
CITY OFFICERS
Mayor.
H. M. Myer
Recorder....... .......... R. W. Van Fleet
Treasurer.,,...;.................. F. L. Gilbert
Councilmen
M. Story, 0. L. McClure, Monroe
Smead, J. A. Thompson, David
Doerpher and Everett Post
School Board
R. W. Morehead, J. E. McClure and
Harry Watkinds.
Justice of the Peace
W. H. Daugherty
Constable and Deputy Sheriff
Henry Slavens
Mails, r
Arrive from Lebanon...... ... 1:30
“ Brownsville.... .... 3:30
“ Cascadia......... „...8:45.
“Wha. is the difference between last
year’s machine and this?”
Depart for Lebanon.:...... ... 0:00
“The horns have a different sound."
“ Brownsville.'... ... 4:00
—St. Louis Globe-Democrat.
“ Cascadia......... ... 2:00
•™—'-‘id
[p
IS
a
a
Mealey Bros. Mill Company
Manufacturers of all kinds of-
Rough and Dressed Lumber
from Douglass Fir
A good supply of .Well Seasoned Stock
constantly on hand. Silo stock a specialty,
Personal attention given to all orders,
We sell 10% lower than Lebanon prices,
and on all large orders allow an especial
discount of 5% for cash. Come and see us
and let us figure with you on your order.
Our Prices are Right
A Lesson In Natural History.
An indulgent grandfather was enter
taining his grandchildren by turning
the leaves of a book on animals. Com
ing to the kangaroo, he called their
attention to its peculiarities and espe
cially to its enormous tail. Passing on.
after awhile he thought he would try
them to see how much they remember
ed of this talk about the kangaroo.
He asked, “What animal has the big
gest tail?” After a moment’s thought
one little girl spoke tip. “1 know, a
snake; it’s all tail.” — Indianapolis
News
* '
a
sä
Fair Stronger—How much has Mrs.
Gadabout Tomlinson on deposit here?
Bank Teller—1 cannot tell you.
Fair Stranger—Why, I thought you^
were the ‘.‘teller!”—Chicago News.
CITY DRUG STORE
N. R. LUTHER, M. D. Prop.
Drugs, Patent Medicines
Perfumes, Toilet ;
Articles, Sundries
Dr. Luther will attend professional calls at reasonable distances
Day or Night
Dr. Robert’s and Korinek’s Veterinary Remedies
East Main Street
SWEET HOME, ORE.
p.m.
p.m.
a.m.
a.m.
p.m.
p.m.