OPINION Page 6 n THE ASIAN REPORTER March 2, 2015 Volume 25 Number 5 March 2, 2015 ISSN: 1094-9453 The Asian Reporter is published on the first and third Monday each month. Please send all correspondence to: The Asian Reporter 922 N Killingsworth Street, Portland, OR 97217 Phone: (503) 283-4440, Fax: (503) 283-4445 News Department e-mail: news@asianreporter.com Advertising Department e-mail: ads@asianreporter.com General e-mail: info@asianreporter.com Website: www.asianreporter.com Please send reader feedback, Asian-related press releases, and community interest ideas/stories to the addresses listed above. Please include a contact phone number. Advertising information available upon request. Publisher Jaime Lim Contributing Editors Ronault L.S. Catalani (Polo), Jeff Wenger Correspondents Ian Blazina, Josephine Bridges, Pamela Ellgen, Maileen Hamto, Edward J. Han, A.P. Kryza, Marie Lo, Simeon Mamaril, Julie Stegeman, Toni Tabora-Roberts, Allison Voigts Illustrator Jonathan Hill News Service Associated Press/Newsfinder Copyright 2015. Opinions expressed in this newspaper are those of the authors and not necessarily those of this publication. Member Associated Press/Newsfinder Asian American Journalists Association Better Business Bureau Pacific Northwest Minority Publishers (PNMP) Philippine American Chamber of Commerce of Oregon Correspondence: The Asian Reporter welcomes reader response and participation. 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Back issues of The Asian Reporter may be ordered by mail at the following rates: First copy: $1.50 Additional copies ordered at the same time: $1.00 each Send orders to: Asian Reporter Back Issues, 922 N. Killingsworth St., Portland, OR 97217-2220 The Asian Reporter welcomes reader response and participation. If you have a comment on a story we have printed, or have an Asian-related personal or community focus idea, please contact us. Please include a contact name, address, and phone number on all correspondence. Thank you. MY TURN n Wayne Chan The three-headed monster with six arms & six legs e have a problem. In our home, there’s an incredibly de- structive force we’ve been up against for quite a while. It’s a physical menace, wreaking havoc on anything of value that we hold dear. We’ve tried our level best to protect ourselves and our belongings, but to no avail. No matter what we do, no matter what we try, something in our house will be destroyed. The worst part of it is, we brought this on ourselves. We willingly brought this burden into our homes. As hard as it is to believe, this is something we actually wanted. What is this nuisance that affects the very fabric of our lives? One word — children. You may have heard of them. We’ve got three of them, as if one child destroying the home wasn’t enough. I know what you’re going to say — “Children, the magic of life, so pure and innocent, they spring from our protective arms to take with them all the love and curiosity they have and make the world a better place.” Really? Well, our first magic of life knocked down an expensive sculpture in the hallway while playing ball in the house, despite being told more than a million times not to play ball in the house. What’s even more galling is that this magic of life had the nerve to actually look surprised when we started yelling at him for knocking down an expensive piece of artwork while playing ball in the house even though we’ve told him not to play ball in the house more than a million times. Our second magic of life decided to reheat a burrito in the microwave. Despite me showing him the proper way to open this microwave oven is to first lift up on the handle then pull the door open, he yanked on the handle so hard that the microwave W came out of the cabinet and smashed on the floor. But hey, at least he managed to heat his burrito. Our third magic of life, our beautiful daughter, managed to top both her brothers in the amount of damage she could inflict while simultaneously leaving no options for us to punish or even admonish her. Being the helpful child that she is, she volunteered after dinner to put away all the clean dishes that were drying. In the process of putting away a valuable piece of china, she accidentally dropped it on our expensive glass stovetop and smashed the stovetop into a million pieces, breaking not only the costly stovetop, but the high-priced china as well. Despite being full of rage and now needing to replace a brand new stovetop and throw away now-shattered china, I don’t even get the satisfaction of chewing out my child for breaking it in the first place. What am I supposed to say? “How many times have I told you not to help out around the house?” Before you start in with me about the beauty of children, listen, I get it. Sure, they were cute when they were young. And yes, I’m sure I’ll be a proud dad when I see my kids graduate, get married, and start careers of their own, out on their own. But one is in the past and the rest is all in the future. As Janet Jackson once sang, “What Have You Done For Me Lately?” I’ll let you in on one secret I’m really looking forward to — grandchildren. Grandchildren are what I call “payback time.” One day you’ll see me in my rocking chair, a gregarious, cheerful grandpa looking over the magic of life that are my grandchildren. I’ll bounce them on my knee, give them hugs, and hand out baseballs by the crate. Opinions expressed in this newspaper are those of the authors and not necessarily those of this publication. Celebrate the Year of the Sheep! February 19, 2015 to February 7, 2016 Read our special Lunar New Year edition online at .