Southern Oregon News Review, Thursday, May 12, 1949
rtM A L t
rtA L E
ORGANIZATION WOULD
Why Not Let the Ladies Take Over UN's Job?
_____________________
LET THE GALS TAKE OVER!
JOE
M A w n w rv
■ • • SOLVE THE GROMYKO PROBLEM PRONTO
,
By H. I. PHILLIPS
never loses anything through being
photogenic.
Sen. M argaret Chase of Maine
_ •
proposes that the women of the
The men have had their chance
world form their own United Na­ at bringing world peace and have
tions or other peace organization. sliced every shot. Senator Chase de­
Why not? Even if they didn’t get clares. We agree. This harassed
peace the fighting would be easier world would feel better if it knew
on the eye. An international debate that its future was in the hands of
NIGHT
T
H i iM d i :
H A N K God for night, with its great gift
o f deep.
More wonderful than all His gifts to men I
For Sirs that walk the dreainwsys, snd that keep
Their wide-eyed watch until dawn breaks again.
Thank God for blessed silence down the land.
More soothing than the drip o f summer rain;
For darkness, soft and cool as some dear hand
Laid on a forehead feverish with pain.
Oh, only those who carry sleepless scars
Can know how sweet sleep is that comes at lad;
And only the eyes that have looked long at Stars
Have learned night’s secret as it marches pad,
Have learned to know how quiet God mud keep
To guide an earth through dirs that men may sleep.
-----------------------
somebody who could at least bake
a cake.
_ •
No matter how deep the
planet's faith In those men dele­
gates ever got there was ah
ways the realization that they
really didn't know how to re­
place a lost shirt button.
•
It seems to us that the men might
well be called off the peace job
and the women sent in. In four
years the men haven't even made
anybody turn around and look at
them. Not a delegate has had a
song written to him. There hasn't
been a heartthrob in a carload.
• ■
U. N. has no glamour. For one per­
son who can name the head of the
organization 1.000 can name the
| young woman who was Miss Some
body's Beer for 1048.
If the women formed a peace
organization, took over U.N. and
sent the men home to look after
the kids, put out the eat and do
other things not subject to the
veto.
the peace movement
would Immediately acquire Im ­
mense affection and devotion.
Maybe what the world needs
Is a League that can be whistled
at!
•
get what they want merely by
flashing a two-word message
to all
women everywhere:
"Stop cooking!" And they could
follow that up with an order to
the girls Io refuse to answer the
universal question. “ Where did
you put the aspirin. Nellie?"
— o —
To cap it all they could say. "Not
a bed will be made or a sock
washed until the armies of the
earth disband."
Gangway for the ladies! They
will know the right perfumery. And
if. by any chance, they muddled
things up even more, the muddle
would at least have that certain
something.
s s e
CUFFSTUFF
President Truman threw out the
first ball at the opening of the
baseball season in Washington. It
was a Blair House twister with al­
ternating altitude and depth, and
everybody can now understand why
he feels control is so mandatory to
the American system.
Can you remember away back
when the flags in a college student's
room did not
include picket
banners?
We can see swift results. A fe­
male U N. would get a bigger play
in all the newspapers and maga­
zines. It would probably make the
cover of Life. It would even make
television, which is the ultimate
goal these days. Whenever interest
in the organization tailed off the
delegates could be photographed in
beach attire or endorsing a girdle.
-SPORT LIG H T
Where-o-where Are the Kid Stars?
By GRANTLAND RICE
•T H E NATIONAL PASTIME (slang
for baseball) takes over until
October 2 when football will be at
high speed, outdrawing baseball
two to one at that frosty date.
In the same way, enough sun has
been drifting from blue skies to get
a few million golfers out for an­
other big campaign on some 5.000
courses.
Jones. Walter Hagen, Gene Sara­
zen, Chick Evans and Francis
Ouimet are now ghosts from an-
other generation. Frank Stranahan.
at 27, is the best we have left.
In both baseball and golf, the kid
stars of long ago and now almost-
forgotten years have moved into
middle age. At least this is now
where most of the headliners be
long.
The Blair House, now occupied
by the president as a temporary
White House, has been piped for
music from a corporation render­
ing this service to hotels and res­
taurants. Does this mean Mrs.
Truman and Margaret are in an
all-out move to discourage Harry
Baseball is large­
at the piano?
• • •
ly for the specta­
tors. Golf is 90 per Golf’s Leading Marvel
Elm trees a half century old
A woman’s United Nations would have been carted in from the coun­
It was a matter of Just 27 years
cent for the play
solve the Gromyko problem pronto. try and planted along Fifth ave.
ers. Golf still has ago over the well-trapped terrain
There has never been a time when We feel sorry for them. It's a little
the largest outdoor of Skokie, Chicago, that 20 year-
one woman could veto 1.000 other late in life to start afresh in New
turnout
for
the old Gene Sarazen won the open golf
women and live.
championship of the United States.
players, b a r r i n g
York. We saw one of the trees on
_ • —
fishing and hunt­ I followed that final round. In the
a truck preparatory to planting and
What can men do when the
ing.
which
a r e same year. Sarazen won the P.G A.
distinctly heard it moan. "New
world is ornery? Nothing. But
strictly personal af title at Oakmont.
York is all right for a visit, but
in a showdown the women could
Twenty-seven years is a long
Grantland Rice fairs. In fishing and
I ’d hate to live there."
hunting the contest is between a span in competitive sport. Yet a
human and a fish, fowl or animal. few days ago, 1 followed Gene Sara­
All of this is a slow preamble to zen at the Masters In Augusta. He
the fact that both baseball and golf, was hitting the ball better in 1949
two playing games, are running than he was in 1922. He was longer
out of kids. Both sports are looking off the tee and he was straighter.
for more of the young stars of other I saw good young golfers of 27 or
years kids like Ty Cobb and Babe 30 finish well In back of stocky
Ruth and Grover Alexander—or Gene’s wallops.
TT H A PPE N E D that young Glen over the cab. The noise of the motor
glass. The two men Inside
I spoke to Gene about thia
such golf kids as Bobby Jones.
By INEZ GERHARD
Lloyd was the only warden on had drowned out sounds of his ap-
turned to find themselves star­
later. "You must be 10 or 15
Gene Sarazen. Walter Hagen. Fran
IM AND M AR IA N Jordan had duty when Chief Fred Mather re­ I proach.
ing into the gun’s muzzle.
yards better than you were at
cis Ouimet and Chick Evans who
been in and out of small-time ceived word that poachers were
Skokie and Oakmont, when you
Reversing his service gun. Glen
Warden Loomis, trekking north­ were stars at 20 and 21
show business for several years doing a wholesale business in crept up behind the men, felled ward to join young Glen Lloyd, was
were only 20," I said.
I in- fact Is that neither base­
when a $10 bet landed them on the moose meat up in Birchill county. I one of them and grappled with the astonished to find a truck on the
ball nor golf has the brilliant
'There Isn’t any question about
radio. They were visiting J im ’s
| other. The scuffle was short-lived. old tote road. The truck stopped
kids of 20 years ago.
that, ’ Gene said, with a well-re­
Glen was a rookie on the Job. As
brother in Chicago when Jim re­
Taken completely by surprise the and a friendly, boyish voice greeted
Who are baseball’s 1949 stars? membered half grin. " I ’m hitting
marked that he and Marian could yet he’d had no contact with either poacher was at a disadvantage. him.
Stan
Musial. 28. Ted Williams, 30. the ball much better than I did
do a better job of singing than any­ the hardships or the dangers of a [ Stunned by the blow which he tried
Joe DiMaggio, 34. Lou Boudreau. when I was winning championships.
north
woods
game
warden.
Chief
"Hi,
Joe,"
Glen
yelled.
"Put
one on the radio program they were
to dodge, he fell against the cab
32. No kids have reported. It is the I am both longer and straighter. I
listening to; Jim ’s brother bet.him Mather decided to use discretion and slumped to his knees when Glen some bracelets on these birds in
same in golf. Most of the stars in have control over a greater number
front,
will
you?
My
hand's
so
stiff
"You
go
up
there
and
do
some
$10 they couldn’t. That was a lot of
of shots.
elude players above 31 or 32.
from holding this gun I can’t move
reconnoitering,” he told the youth struck out a second time.
Sammy Snead, Lloyd Mangrum,
Yes," he continued,
"and I
The warden handcuffed the
it—let alone pull the trigger."
________
“You'll find a
Byron Nelson, Jimmy Demaret are know your next question. Why is
two
men
to
an
upright
in
the
base camp un­
When Chief Mather heard the no longer on the younger competi­
it I ’m not winning? That's simple.
truck, then approached the cab.
der a cliff near
story he wrote a personal letter
tive side.
There are two or three answers.
There
was
a
small
window
in
the headwaters
to Supervisor Herrick, compliment­
One is legs. Another is ambition.
They are well over 30. Cary
its rear. Through this Glen
of the Beaver.
ing the supervisor on his choice of
Middlecoff is close to 30.
The third is concentration. There
thrust
his
gun,
splintering
the
I
men.
Make this your
• But the point is there are no Ty
s a lot of difference between your
headquarters until Warden Loomis
Cobbs. Bobby Jones, Walter Hag­ legs at 20 and 47. And tired golfers
arrives. He’ll tell you how to pro­
ens. Gene Sarazens, etc., marked don't do go well.
ceed.” Chief Mather drummed with
against the skylfne. The great kids
"The only urge to win left
his pencil. "Don’t take any chances,
of yesterday, for the time being,
years ago. When you’ve won the
son. I ’ve an idea
that
Moe
are gone.
U.8. Open, the British Open,
Stanford’s behind this ring. He’s a
In baseball they are paying
the P.G.A. and other titles, the
bad actor.”
bonuses from $50,000 to $75.000 for
old ambition of youth begins to
Glen reached the base cabin two
high school kids who might finally
wither.
ACROSS
days later. The ground was cov­
be worth $2,000. Or nothing at all.
Solation In N e x t lia n a .
You are no longer willing to take
You can't blame the kids, or their
ered with a six-inch fall of snow
1 Store
the mental and nerve beating. Even
parents, for grabbing this sucker Bobby Jones wasn't.
5 Wine
Glen waited two days more and
cash, the greatest sucker cash in
receptacles
then decided to take matters into
" I kept playing but, like Jones.
I
the history of sports.
9 Heedless
his own hands. Armed with his ser­
Nelson and others who retired, 1
Fibber and Molly
11
Forbid
The two big leagues have In­
vice pistol and a flashlight he con­
found it impossible to keep concen-
money to the Jordans then; they
12 Keel-billed
vested over $500.000 in kid bonus
trating through 72 holes, 36 holes
cuckoo
showed up at Station WIBO, and cealed himself near the tote road
players. They will be lucky to
13 Chest
or 18 holes. I can concentrate for
landed on the air. Five months on top of a ridge where the prog
get
$50,000 back In the way of
15 Guido’s
a while, but not for too long. I miss
later the radio job ended, and they ress of the truck would have to be
value.
lowest note
a shot or two now and say, ’aw,
Went back to vaudeville. It was slow. It was bitterly cold and a
The age problem is even worse
16 Close to
what the heck,’ and concentrate on
not until later that they became brisk wind was blowing. Also there
in golf. Such great kids as Bobby
17 Sign of the
about every third shot.
"Fibber McGee and Molly" in one was the promise of snow in the air.
infinitive
Midnight came and went and
of radio’s top ranking radio series.
19 Rough lava
20 Job
Glen’s spirits ebbed low. Cursing
22 Spring
Dr. Henry Darlington, Rector of himself for delaying action, Glen
month
New York’s Church of the Heavenly was about to quit his hiding place
24 A form of
Rest, recently appeared as family when he heard distantly the roar
lotto
counselor on "The Second Mrs. of an automobile motor.
25 British
Burton." Listening to the singing
author
He waited until the driver
commercials, he remarked, “If
26 A theater
was
shifting
gears
for
the
final
churches used a device as catchy
attendant
pull, then stepped out into the
28 Velvet­
as this, I could guarantee standing
glare of the lights. He held his
like
room only.” No doubt he went
gun In one hand. The badge on
31 Touch end
home and asked the cook to try
to end
his sheepskin coat was plainly
those seven delicious flavors.
35 More
visible.
infrequent
Burt Lancaster is back in the
Instead of stopping, the driver
36 Piece of
No. 34
circus; he finished "Rope ol
bore down on the accelerator. The
rock
Sand" and headed for Louis­
truck roared straight at the war­ 37 Conjunction
3 King of
29 A lasso
36 Husk
ville, Ky., and the Cole Broth­
den. Glen stepped to ohe side, bare­ 38 Therefore
Bashan
30 Biblical city
42 Mimic
39
Pronoun
er s circus, to do an acrobatic
4 Dish
ly avoiding being hit, and as the
32 Board of
44 Measure
40
Quaker
state
a c t with his former partner,
5 Excite
Ordnance
heavy machine lumbered by he
(Chin.)
(abbr.)
Nick Cravat; will appear with
6 Personal
(abbr.)
[ swung himself onto the running
45 Coniferous
41
Covering
pronoun
it in 26 cities.
33 Remove
tree
board. He clung there perilously
of brain
7 Sayings
from suitcase
47 Bone (anat.)
43 Eskimo tool
I for a moment, then something hit
8
Line
of
34 Rip
Howard “Sam Spade" Duff re­
48 Musical note
45 Distant
descent
lived a scary experience when he him on the head, he heard an angry
46 Clearly
10 At home
A nsw er te P o s ile N um ber SS
and other members of the "P art­ curse, and went spinning of into
demonstrable
11 Male deer
a n u a HEHU
(logic)
ners in Crime" cast were flying space.
14 Variety of
□ a a a a a a u a ti
49 G irl’s
Fifteen minutes later he emerged
to Universal-International’s loca­
cabbage
□nana acanu
nickname
tion in Tucson. The plane shook on to the same tote road where it
16 Stirs up
flu u
a n a □□
50
Church
18
Treat
□ □ □ ¿ a u x ama
violently, and one engine went dead. doubled back on itself. The lights
(Scot.)
HHQ
uaaa
surgically
Finally landed on the remaining from the truck were already sweep­
UBUC3 UUQDU
21
Ahead
DOWN
three. When he was in the South ing up the incline.
ácana □□□
BORDERS, APPLY
23 Railroad
Pacific during the war. Duff was Q L E N CROUCHED b e h i n d a
□ ä o a a a tiD a a
THE SHEETS WITH
1 Scythe
(abbr.)
a a auo
auo
in a plane that encountered severe
handle
25 Timid
WALLPAPER PASTE,
boulder, glad that the darkness
□ □ □ □ u tiuaac:
headwinds, threatened to run out was so intense. He waited until the
(var.)
27 Winding
uaaua aa
AND COAT TH EM
of gas. He admits that he was as truck had crawled by, then ran
2 Female
sheets
□ □ □ a □□
WITH CLEAR SHELLAC.
fowl
28 A support
scared as anybody else, but he | after it. He caught the tailboard |
Serles K —48
took out some cards and started a
— Thanks to J. C. 9 .,
and hoisted himself up. Two men
Ashland, Ky.
poker game.
were standing up front, leaning
— Grace N o ll Crowell
SfÀGrSCRE
I
CROSSWORD PUZZLE