S o u t h e r n O r e g o n M i n e r , T h u r s d a y , N o v e m b e r 2, 1944 An Ire-ish Response to Mrs. G. R. Skate's Request Reception to M rs. George B er­ nard Shaw ’s bequest of a fund to teach the Irish social graces was not too enthusiastic by the Irish . Typ ical A m erican -Irish com m ent was that the Irish w ere cultured “ when the people M r. and M rs. Shaw descended from were shar­ ing bones w ith the troglodytes in the caves of E n g lan d .” One aggrieved Irish m an broke into verse. In a few lines "T o M rs. G. B. S. in h eaven,” he demanded, as follows: if * Irish nee«/ m a n n e rs? T h e b e st o f u s— A n d e ve n th e u -orst—c a n n o t i m U h y yo u sh o u ld he ju d g in ' th e rest o f us B y tch a l y o u o b s e r v e d in G . B. GOD IS MY CO-PILOT C o l. R o b e r t L .S c o ff The story thus tar: R o b ert Scott, a W est P oint « ra d u a ta , « In s his « la g s at K e lly F ie ld . Te xas . He Is sent to Paa- a m a , w here his re a l pursuit tra in in g la begun In a P-tXS. Soon he Is Instructing other pilots, and as the w a r com es clos­ er It begins to look as though he Is scheduled to he an In structor In d efinitely. H e « r ite s m any letters to G en erals pleading to r a chance to fight, and at las t the op po rtunity comes In the fo rm ot a phone c a ll fro m W ashington asking It he r a n fiy a to ur-m oto r bo m b er. W hen he leaves his « t ie and child behind he realises (h a t (hey re a lly m ean t A m e ric a tor hint, but this heartach e soon leaves h im . He picks up his F o rt In F lo rid a and files to In d ia . from the crews of the thirteen ships of our original mission. Even with the loss in morale they had suf­ fered when the attack on Tokyo was called off, they were still the best transport pilots I had ever seen. Colonel Haynes was a veteran big- ship pilot, and for the last ten years he had worked In four-engine bombers. The records that he had j set with the giant B-15 will inspire the Air Force forever. Here was a big. cheerful master pilot who never asked another man to do a Job he wouldn't do himself. We of the A. B. C. Ferrying Command looked upon him as the best, and Haynes will always stand out in my mind as one of the greatest officers of our army. This jovial veteran was ready to do anything to help win the war, but we all knew he pre­ ferred to kill Japs rather than rustle freight across to Burma. I lived with Colonel Haynes on one of the tea plantations in Assam, where we were billeted with a Scotsman. Josh Reynolds of Sealkotte Tea Estate. Major Joplin, whom we called "Jop." was another of our pilots. This man claimed that he had been born in a DC-2 and weaned in a C-47. One of the Pan-American pi­ lots had made a forced landing with one of the transports, putting it down with the wheels up in a rice would be a good morale element for the crews of the unarmed trans­ ports. The Job of being a ferry pilot had to go on nevertheless. As the leaks developed again In the tanks of the P-43's, 1 went back to flying the Doug­ las transports into Burma and Chi­ na. One day while I was acting as co-pilot for Colonel Haynes, we load­ ed two disassembled Ryan Trainers in the C-47 and headed for Kun­ ming. Besides this cargo we had some ammunition and food for the AVG at Loiwing. especially a bottle of Scotch whiskey to be left as a present for General ChennaulL We landed at Loiwing and deliv­ ered tlie designated cargo. The air raid alert came Just as we were talking with the General. He didn't eve” change expression, but calmly said. "Guess we’re going to have some Japs—you-all had better get those transports off the field." The Flying Tigers were already tak ing oil their shark-painted noses gleaming in the sun. Lord, but my mouth watered as I saw them—I'd have given anything to trade my Colonel’s eagles and that "delivery wagon” that I flew for the gold bars of a second Lieutenant and one of \ those shark-nosed pieces of dyna­ mite! P a rty A pron But we started the Douglas up HOSTESS apron which every- and took off for China with the cargo * * one, young and old, adm ires— of trainers. Even as we cleared it ’s a big 20-inch heart made of the field and climbed towards the Salween. I heard the call "Tally. two thicknesses of red prgandie Ho" from the AVG. and then others and frille d w ith w hite organdie more like "Here come the sons of ruffling. W ear one at your next Well, the Air Base General had to ask us to carry out the mission, and to ease the monotony we were glad to comply. Taking the bomb- bay tanks from the ship, we loaded with five-hundred-pound bombs and off we went, eight hundred miles into the Arabian Sea. looking for a Jap naval force composed of three warships, five destroyers, five cruis­ ers. and two aircraft carriers—with our one bomber. Due to the low picture weather we had to fly beneath the « a t of * e reco«nmeoJ¿ cloud base at seven thousand feet. Reaching our patrol area, we searched until it was necessary to th a t shine. » O O T *. return to base for fuel. I have of­ ten wondered what we would have done had we had the fortune or misfortune to find that task force—if it existed. After all, from seven thousand feet we could have done very little damage with a single ship. Somehow I'm glad we did bitches." A few seconds later the not engage the enemy—I always Jap bombers arrived over the field hated to be a clay pigeon, and at Loiwing and we knew all the though the future looked dark, there transports couldn't have gotten off. were interesting days ahead. The AVG radio man. "M icky” Mi- Slowly, though, through days In haiko, called. "They’re bombing hell p ro m p tly relieve coughing ot which some of the others took their out of the field.” Then, in lighter ships to bomb Rangoon and the vein, he said the Japs were falling Andaman Islands, and finally when like leaves—or he hoped they were Haynes returned from Delhi, the W onderful fo r G ro w n -u p s , Tool Japs, for he could see many smokes W h e n e v e r th e Q u in tu p le ts c a tc h cold — realization sank in that our mission from burning planes. Every now t heir chests, th ro a ts an d backs are rubbed was cancelled. I have never seen and then we could hear one of the w ith M u s te ro le . S o M u s te ro le m u st be thirteen crews of bombers carrying ju s t about th e best cold-relief yo u can b u y ! AVG say to some unlucky Jap. so many broken hearts. Morale Ju st see how p ro m p tly w h ite , stainless "Your mother was a turtle—your fa­ M u ste ro le relieves coughs, sore th ro a t, dropped like a stone. On April 21, ther was a snake,” —and then the aching chest muscles d ue to colds — how when the base took our ships, I rattle of fifty-caliber guns over the breathing becomes easier — how fa s t con­ think we would have been justified gestion in u p per b ron ch ial tr a c t, nose radio. and th ro a t begins t o break u p ! Such in getting stinking drunk. We stayed low in the gorge of the blessed co m fo rt! I n S strengths: C h il­ New orders came for Colonel Salween until we got to the old dren 's M ild , R e g u la r a n d E x tr a S tro n g . Haynes and most of us in the ill- bridge near Paoshan, then turned fated "dream mission” to report to East for Yunnanyl. Behind us the a remote base In eastern Assam, on Col. Merlanti C. Cooper watches Japs damaged the tail of one of our the India-Burma border, to run the sky for return of U. 8. plane*. transports with a bomb, and also A. B. C. Ferrying Command. This blew up the bottle of Scotch that I Assam-Burma-China transport com­ paddy near the Brahmaputra. Jop had brought General Chennault—it mand was for the purpose of carry­ took a crew to the transport, took had been left In one of the Jeeps ing supplies to China and Burma, the bent propellers off and roughly that was h it But they had paid to make up as much as possible for straightened them. With his crew heavily for the transport tail and the and some volunteer natives, he dug the fall of the Burma road. quart of whiskey. I believe that When Colonel Haynes and I ar­ holes under the folded-up landing- even the Woman’s Christian Tern rived in Assam we both considered gear and then let the gear down un­ G o easy on ra n n e lf! Gcocly, m ild ly .__ perance Union would have approved 'm t cw i n i l left-overs" out of the way with ourselves "shanghaied." I could tell, til it was fully extended, with the cup or two of Garfield Tea, the popular all- wheels down, to the bottom of the of the trade—for the AVG had shot as we faced each other across the herb ''internal cleanser.'* Garfield Tea is down thirteen of the Zeros and bomb­ a ''cure-all.'* but if you warn ¡ n u h breakfast table that first morning, holes. Now he placed heavy tim­ ers. while as usual they lost none. teliet from temporary cotutipatioo bers from the wheels to the surface that we both knew that things were r i t S u u drastic a rues, try a cup of At Kunming, with the surprised of the rice paddy, putting them in thia fragraot, 10-berb tea. as directed going to be bad. Our status had Chinese looking on, we unloaded the on package. Y ou 'll feet better, feed changed from participating in what at a small angle to form an inclined better, work better! At oil dr *« o i two small training planes from the beeltb feed ttoret, I0e-2fe-50e. we considered the “greatest mis­ plane. Next he had about a hun­ fuselage of the big Douglas. Then, HO! SAMPLE TRIM. PACKAGE! sion in the world,” to the insignif­ dred natives pull on ropes that were after something to eat, when I had _ __ jf ftB tnts pi icant task of running a ferry com­ tied to the wheels, and dragged the fw 4 taas. to: Garfield Tss Ca . '4is ASK M O T H E R , SHE K N O W S . . . CLABBER GIRL LOOSE DENTAL PLATES I f P eter P ain twists you up . X / T t 4 n w ™ “S T IF F N eck ’. ’S s K A wW ,» **•* < i \V w « Ä l k A & .JW B M Sen-Gay QU/CK • Yes Ben-Gay gives fast, welcome relief from pain and 2! oCi / ^ if 0rt du® ‘ ° ,tiff neck' T h at’s ^cause it contain! up to 2 / 2 times more methyl salicylate and menthol-famous pain-relieving agents that every doctor know»-than five other widely offered rub-ins. For soothing relief, make •ure you get genuine, quick-acting Ben-Gayt ’ jo in THE C .6.C J I /I / r / l / s O B e N - G a Y - the o r ig in a l a n a l g é s iq u e baume fñ r P A tN ' 0 « ” T UE TO I N b E U M A T IS M . n e u r a l g ia ( a NDCOLDS I IH IR I m il d j «1 A L S O b e n gay EORC KHO R EN *