Friday, August 31,1934 The JACKSONVILLE MINER Page 8 ' more Each morning the pack out­ life into its nostrils, he brought it fit. consisting of 16 picked Mis­ to Adam as per usual and inquired souri mules, would load these what name would be appropriate sacks (four to the mule) ant start for the creature. Adam looked it j for the railroad These grand I over carefully, smelled of it, mules could handle 400 pounds stroked Its fur and lifted it by the apiece easily. And the («ackers tail. Finally he said. "Well, we'd 1 were experts in their line Two better call it a cal So a eat it packers, one on each aide, could was and always has been since. I load a mule much quicker than I Now it came to pass that the am telling it. Well, the guy down beast called "cat" waxed hungry (Continued from page one) made a lot of con­ in due time and. casting about for bery. Please note the difference be­ the road had in his little mill and had something to eat. did spy the ba­ tween that an«i the highgrading we centrates them all packed ready in the nanas upon which Adam was wont did in the SP later, which was branded sacks of the SP mine that to fet'd himself, and would fain ILLEGAL. At the time I worked we had furnished him. Along would have filled its belly with the lus­ there, this mine had produced six come the pack train and stop cious fruit. But after having tasted million and a half dollars and was Quickly two mules had their loads it. spat it forth in disgust and be­ still going strong. changed from sacks worth from gan to look for something more to America being a most uninter­ $60 to $75 per each to sacks that its liking esting place to live in for a man were worth practically nothing Now the Lord had, previously, with so much money. Mr. Skin­ much In less than three minutes ner, with his wife and two daugh­ eight sacks had been changed and out of some little dabs of left-over ters. resided in Europe, in the va­ the outfit was on its way. When dust, fashioned a number of tiny rious capitals that attracted their the returns came in he supe and creatures which he had covered fancy, leaving operations at the the assayor would have fits They mine in the hands of a superinten­ knew how much the ore ought to with feathers and had made their dent who was supposed to know run. because they had assayed it front legs into wings so they might his stuff. before it was loaded, but it never fly. These had been named birds by When I went to work in this held out only in cases where some­ Adam and they made their abode mine I found everybody on the thing went wrong and the ex­ job was high-grading, even the change could not be made. The in the Garden of Eden. It was at this moment that a mine bosses, ore sorters and stamp leak was never discovered and it mill men, so I was not very hard tickled us stiff to hear them cuss flock of these little songsters came to be persuaded that my best bet the smelter, who they were cer­ flying by, with no thought of dan­ would be to play ball along with tain was robbing them. Now you ger and the cat, with a quick the rest of them, or to get fired can see (if you are a good church spring, pulled one down. One sniff off the job and have to hunt for member) how very wicked it was at the scent of the warm meat be­ something elsewhere. I hadn't been o'- our part to steal the ore of a neath the feathers convinced him there long when we ran into about r in who needed every million he that here was a morsel suitable two tons of white antimony that could get hold of to bet on the for his appetite. But small as he assayed $28,000 to the ton. These bank at Monte Carlo, or something was, the bird made up in clever­ two tons vanished so quickly and else in the line of pleasure and lux­ ness what he lacked in size, and instantly realizing his danger, pro­ completely that the superintendent ury. ceeded to try a bluff. (This was never even heard of them. The ore But of course there was a reason where the first blufff originated). sorters on the dump, whenever they found an extra rich chunk of why Mr. Skinner would wish to So he opened his mouth and specimen quartz would give it a squander his millions in Europe spake to the cat and said, "Sir! no and there was a reason why we sling over the bank, where in time gentleman would ever think of eat­ all the chunks would be gathered should high-grade his ore while he ing a meal without first washing was doing so. There is a reason for up. spirited off to town where they his face.” Then answered the cat would be converted into cash and everything, small or great. For iml said. Well. I don’t know but everybody would get their little everything that occurs there is a what you are right at that," and | cause. Nothing in the universe setting the bird down carefully, be-1 rake-off. But the cleverest scheme for happens haphazardly. Every bit of gan to wash his face, while the high-grading was as follows, and good luck or bad. every so-called bird immediately took advantage j neither superintendent nor any of i miracle, can be traced back to of this opportunity to fly away, i his bright sleuths ever got next to some force that set it in motion. which caused Adam, v.’ho had been it. About a mile below the SP was Even such an insignificant thing watching ,to laugh uproariously, i a body of ore that resembled the as why a cat washes its face after i This was the first laugh that ever ore we were shipping so closely eating, instead of before, indicates occurred on earth.) that the two ores could be mixed there must have been a good rea­ Seeing how neatly he had been together and not even an expert son for such an act. It probably buncoed, the cat turned loose a could tell which was which. But originated in some such a way as flock of cuss words so vitriolic whereas our ore ran $200 or better this: that the other animals fled in ter-1 After creatng the earth, the ror, and raising his right paw to j to the ton. the ore on the claim Lord busied himself in making dif ­ below only ran about $5 per ton. the sky, swore a solemn oath that 1 One of the miners had located a ferent kinds of animals, which he never again would he wash his i claim on this ore and everybody brought to Adam for him to name, face before eatin, and that he | chipped in and helped him buy a as the Good Book tells us in Gene­ would put all his descendants wise j little three-stamp mill. All our ore sis 2:19. One day. experimenting to such a rotten trick, so they was concentrated about six tons with some peculiar looking dust, would never be duped in the same ' into one. which made $1200 ore per he moulded a new kind of animal way. ( This was how profanity or-1 ton to ship to the smelter. These which he endowed with four legs iginated.) concentrates were packed in and a long tail, and to improve its And that is why every cat even [ strong canvas sacks which would appearance covered it with fur. unto the present day never washes hold a hundred pounds, or a trifle Then, having blown the breath of its face until it has eaten. And this j is the origin of the bluff, the laugh and the cuss words of the present day. and also of the bunco trick, all having originated from a tiny little bird in the Garden of Eden, who guilefully made a com­ plete fool of the honest and re­ spectable ancestor of all the cats. CONSCIENCE OF OLD SOURDOUGH WAS FLEXIBLE STORMY WEATHER AHEAD! —e i ■ ■ "Returning confidence” Is a • phrase one could wish were as "There is an alarming inc re as«' true us it is familiar. Weston of reformers. Won't someone Leader. e please step forward and save us Mats 25*' e Eves 85«’ e Kiddies 10c from being saved?" Olin Miller Subscribe for The Jacksonville With pleasure Clark Wood. Miner today. One year one dollar, • Ends Saturday ■ six months one-half, mailed any­ ■ One feels Impelled to regard where in the United States ----- ON THE STAGE----- stratosphere discoveries as on the up and up Weston Leader. • PINTO colvig "Newton Baker can write with either hand.” Perhaps, though, what he writes with his left he rights with his right. Weston Leader. • Sometimes a battle-ax is seen driving Cadillacs Weston (Ore. I Leader. ----- ON THE SCREEN----- James Cagney — Pat O'Brien Adults 25c - Kiddies 10c “Here ('«»nies the Navy” Fri-Sut ■ ■ ■ Ralph Bellamy ROXY 20c ä 11 1 Children 10«' “Girl in Danger” KEN MAYNARD In with the Sensational New I Child Ntar . . . 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RADIO SERVICE Medford Phone 4 • TRY THE NEW MODEL UNDERWOOD TYPEWRITERS • Across from Roxy Theater CONGER Expert Radio Repair V Joe Dunne should be able to One can indulge a superiority complex bv thumbing his nose at hold down any kind of a chair. - Jupiter, which is 300 times as big Weston I-cader. e — us the earth Weston Loader. —•------------------ Looks as though, now, Uncle The deportation of Hollywood's Ham is preparing instead of paring had actors who'vc been aiding ana