A Haa Break.
Wife Why did you glre that phon
graiih away Just tx-fore we were mar
ried? Didn't yu think I could us HI
IIuHlmnd My dVnr, I gave It sway
to ki'fp irfwe. Don't you know that
so tioumj Is Hi fiiougU for two talking
machltifa?
And at the last m'rt he was still
trying to Kjuare himself. Detroit Fret
1'rt'sa.
Ileeostallloa.
Th men who devote thHr time to
the country's service should he reoog
Dlse,M said the official.
"Well," answered Farmer Corntassel,
"some of 'em should and others 'ud be.
more rejected If they could approach
the payroll la disguise." 'Washington
Star.
Leas litlakMM,
"Do you think your Insurance com
pany la being conducted more econom
ically r
"I'm si.V of lt,H answered the hop,
ful citizen. "It doesn't aend me nearly
as many blotters and calendars as It
nsed to." Washington Star.
Carle Allea.
"I've observed on thing about a foot
race," said t'ncls Allen Hjarka. If you'vs
got sny umney up on tb result it always
turns out difftTvntly from what you think
It's iing to."
Nat Qelle tha Bam.
Miss IJute lie told me once that I
was quite pretty.
Miss Chellus Yes, he also told me
that you were quite pretty once.
Philadelphia I'ichs.
A great extension of ths Siberian rail
road la proponed along the Itiver Amur,
and as It baa met with hearty approval on
tbs part of tbo present ministry, It Is like
ly to ! count ructed. It will open up 40,
000,000, acres of corn land.
State of Ohio, City of Toledo J
uuvmu iiiiiii j. i
Prank J. heney makes oatli that ha Isaonlnf
tartner of the Ann ol K. J.( ln'iiry Co., (lulu
iialoeaatntlieClty oil ol1o, ( ounty and Htste
aiore.aia. bmh tnai sain nrm win iiajr ilia turn
of ON K III NDKKI) lOI.LAHX l.ir each ai.J
aver cane of Catarrh that can nut be cured by
Uia uaa of il ali i Catarrh Cure..
KKANK J. CHENEY,
flworn to before ma and an twrrl ImII ii my irua
ure, tutc Gill day of lveiulwr A I) lW.
,oc" ' Notary I'ublli..
Hall's Catarrh Cure U taken Internally, ami
Seta dlrvetly upon the. blood and niiirniia iur
laros of thaiyitrm. Hend fur l-ilmonll (n-.
K.J.fllKNKY 4CO.,Tulodo,0.
ft"lt bf all drti(Kl''U,7!p.
lake U all's Jfauillj 1'UU for eomtlpatlon.
Iteaetloa,
(Salesman Hat, sir? Yes; what kind
do you wish to look at?
Customer Well, my wife wears a Mer
ry Widow affair. If you bavs eomething
that la ths exact optolt of It, young
Brian, that's what I wsnt.
HalesiiMin Then you want i:s bat,
f course, with a black band around it.
That la the nearest we can corns to a
Dlsconuolats Wldowsr bat. Chicago
Tribune.
Gave It t'p.
"Uncle Henry, bow big a tarpon dli
you ever cat(4i?"
"Why. Hammy, once I but how big
tarpon did you ever hear of?"
"Seven f'et ten Inches is ths record."
Tin not going to try to beat that, Sam
my. I have only a few years to llvs, and
I want to go to heaven so mo day."
A Flaaaelar.
Judge How ninny times hare you
been arrested tn'fore?
Prisoner Five, sir.
Judge Then I "linll feel It my duty
to Impose the maximum fine"
Prisoner Hut, your honor, Isn't It
only fair to give a reduced rate to reg
uJsr customers? Jihlt.
Forestry la Korea la to I taken up by
the government under new foreot laws,
said to have been enacted under a co-operative
agreement drawn up by Japan and
Korea. It la also reHrted that a Behind
for training Korean foresters haa been
established.
I'reiuat ure.
Husband (on overland train) -Tou
mustn't mind It, Maria, if I take several
doaes of spirits during the day, from now
on. It's the only thing that will cut this
alkali dnat that gets Into one's throat.
Wife You won't hsve to do it to-duy,
John. I've Immti making soma ltiiiiiriea,
and I And we don't strike the alkali re
gion for GOO miloa yet.
As Itevlsed.
Pall on, sin 11 on, O ship of state I
Portland cemented, strong and great I
Humanity need have no fears;
Tbou'lt go uucracked through all tbt
years,
W ith rocky aides Imperforate I
Chlesgo Tribune. ,'
Ikt Wlee Ufa.
"After ail, It's the wise man who cnu
change his opinion."
'Hut the wisest men simply can't do
it."
"Why not?"
"Iteeauae they ve Ix-cn dead for
years." Catholic Standard and Times,
oQ)oQ)oNO MERCURY
Medicines containing Mercury are often given to persons auffcring with
Contagious DlooJ Poison, and so powerful is the action of this drug that it
frequently removes the symptoms in short while, and. shuts the disease
v.p n the system to do greater damage to the delicate internal members.
When, however, the treatment is left otf, the disease always returns, and the
patient finds that his lua'th has Ucn injured by this powerful mineral, anJ
lie is often left with weak stomach, disturbed digestion, mercurial rheuma
tism, etc. The action of S. S. S. is entirely different. It contains no
Mercury, nor any other harmful drug, but is made entirly of healing,
cleansing roots and herbs. It cures Contagious Blood Poison by removing
the vims frota the blood. It searches out every particle of the poison
and docs not leave the least trace for future outbreaks. S. S. S., in
addition to curing the disease, builds up and strengthens every patt of the
lody. Its fine tonic effects tone up the stomach and digestion, improve the
appetite ai.U regulate the entire system. Home treatment book containing
valuable information about the different stages of the disease and any
lucdkal advice desired sent free to all who write.
THE SWIFT SPECIFIC CO., AllASTA, Ci,
The
General Demand
of tha Well-informed of the World has
always been for a simple, pleasant
and efficient liquid laxative remedy ot
known value; a laxative which physi
cians could sanction for family use
because Its component parta are
known to them to be wholesome and
truly beneficial la tffect, acceptable
to the system and gentle, yet prompt,
In action.
In supplying that demand with Its
excellent combination of Syrup of
Figs and Elixir of Senna, the Cali
fornia Fig Syrup Co. proceeds along
ethical lines and relies on the merits
of the laxative for Its remarkable
success.
That la one of many reasons why
Syrup of Figs and Kllxlr of Senna Is
given the preference by the Well
informed. To get Its beneficial effects
alwaya buy the genuine manufac
tured by the California Fig Syrup Co.,
only, and for aale by all leading
druggists. Price fifty cents per bottle-
Ilia Bear Vmr.
"Ethel," be whlMjered, "will you mar
ry me?"
"I don't know, Charles," she replied,
coyly.
"Well, when you find out," he said,
rising, "send me word, will you? I
shall be at Mabel Hicks' until 10
o'clock. If I don't hear from you by
10 I'm going to ask her." Tid Hits.
Oar 0a Mlastrele.
Hones Mistsh Johnsing, kin yo' tell
me de diff'unce 'tween de dipplymatlc
Inte'co'se o' fuat clasa powaha an' nine
cases o' measles In a cullud fambly?
Interlocutor No, George; that's the
hardest one I ever heard. What la tie
difference between the diplomatic Inter
course of first class powers and nine
canes of measles In a colored family?
Hones De one am de serious affairs of
state an' de uddab am a serious state
of affairs.
Interlocutor Indies snd gentlemen,
rhe premier vocslist of the western hemi
sphere, Mr. Splltcher Ueerdrums, will
now sing the Iteautiful ballad entitled,
"Dnrllng, Take Your Arm Away; Mother-Is
Peeping Through the Keyhole."
A Ilellcloas Castard.
The recipe for this del leu te dessert
has been handed down In my family
for many generations: Into each Indi
vidual custard cup put the yolk of ono
egg, add one heaping tenspoonful of
sugar, two gratings of nutueg and Ave
tablcsjMtoufuls of sweet milk. Incorpo
rate thoroughly and set the cups In a
pan of hot water. Huke In a moderate
oven until firm. When cool, cover with
a meringue, using tlio whites of the
eggs for this purinmo, and allow one
tablespoonful of powdered sugar to the
white of each egg. Through the very
tiptop of each snowy mound drop a
tenspoonful of orange marmalade. De
lineator. net Never Call Ulna starts-.
He Funny thing about your sex.
Call a woman "a bird" and she's pleas
ed. Hut call her a hen or an old crow
and she gets nngry.
She Nothing exclusively femlnlno
about that. Call a m.-m "a and dog"
and he feels good. Hut call him "a
tnlHeralile cur" the same thing and
he'll knock your head oft. Hostou
Transcript.
Kirw Oae ol tha Firm.
Attendant (Showing him through tbs
structure) This house Is built on what
Is known as the "slow combustion" plan.
Mr. I'neurttch Ah, yes; I think I
know S locum. I bsve seen him at tha
club: but I have never had tha tltamirs
of meeting Mr. Hustlou. Chicago Trib
une.
Hrailllan railroads In oneratlon a' tb
beginning ot last year had a total length
of lOJit) miles. In addition there were
l.isrj miles under construction snd 4,177
miles lie In anrveved or nlrendv aottroved.
making tbs total mileage about
miles.
Saved by Tomatoes.
John Vaughn of Merccnille, a rural
U tter carrier, was driving along a road
when an auto plunged Into his light rig
from behind. Vaughn wua tossed In the
air to alight in a load of tomatoes In a
wngoti twenty feet ahead. His rig was
dcmollMhcd, but the soft tomatoes saved
him from serious Injury. The squash
ing of the tomatoes did not save
Vaughn from the Ire of the wapm'a
owner. Tin driver of the automobile
sped on with a grin. Kansas City
Journal.
la tha Coaerete Asa.
First Government Officer (a few years
hence) Anything particular on band to
day? SeeonJ Government Officer Yea; Pve
got to go this afternoon to take part In
the molding ot the corner atone for a new
battleship.
CONTAINS
SETTLING DOWN
FOR LONG SIEGE
No Sign of End In Canadian Pacific
Rcltway Strike.
Japanese Trained on Pacific Coast
to Fill Places of Strikers Fire
men are Promoted Officials are
Confident of No Trouble in Hand
ling Wheat Crop.
Winnipeg, Man., Aug. 8. A quiet
preparation for a long siege by the
men and continued reticence n-garding
their intentions locally are the feat
ures of the Canadian Pacific strike this
evening. No men in large numbers
have come into the city from either
Eastern or Western points, although
rumors are rife that a large contingent
is due here tonight. Pickets are
guarding the entrances to shops and
all railroad terminals. A number of
women have been placed at work
cleaning cars. Testing of cars is go
ing on as usual, the work being done
by foremen.
Mass meetings were held tonight
and addresses given in their native
tongue to Hungarians, Germans and
Russians. J. II. McVey was asked
this afternoon if the other organiza
tions connected with railroad work
were likely to go out Boon. He re
plied:
"If they are going out soon I don't
know of it. If they went out without
notice they would be breaking their
ironclad agreements."
The Canadian Pacific . Railway com
pany yesterday promoted all firemen
who had been serving in the local
roundhouse to be wipers. When crops
begin to move there will be larger de
mand for engineers and firemen than
at present. ,
The company s locomotives and roll
ing stock are at present in excellent
condition, the dry summer having
caused little wear. Resides 300 Jap
anese mechanics trained in the rail
road shops of the Pacific Coast states
and in technical ' school. are arriving
and are being distributed where neces
sary. Sleeping and dining cars have
been drawn up close to the shops to
provide accommodations for the non
union workmen, guarded by special
constables.
SANTA FE FINED $7,000.
Found Guilty of Giving Big Rebates
Masked as Bonus.
Chicago, Aug. 8. The Atchison,
Topeka & Santa Fe railroad, by its
counsel, pleaded guilty to rebating to
day and was assessed a fine of $7,000
by Judge Rethea in the United States
District court. The government, rep
resented by District Attorney Edwin
W. Sims, proved that a bonus paid by
the railroad to the Garden City Sugar
& Land company, of Garden City,
Kan., was in effect a rebate. The
railroad company, through its indus
trial department, offered the Garden
City concern a bonus of $f0,000 for
locating on its lines. The bonus was
paid as freight was shipiH'd, and a
year ago the land company had paid
$22,000 in freight charges and had re
ceived $11,000 of it back in bonus.
HENEY ON THE RACK.
Questioned About $30,000 Fee From
Water Company.
San Francisco, Aug. 8. Assistant
District Attorney Francis J. Heney
was today placed on the witness stand
in the preliminary examination of Ab
raham Ruef in the police court as an
expert on attorneys' fees and interro
gated by Ruef 'a counsel regarding the
alleged receipt by Heney of a fee of
$30,000 from the Contra Costa Water
company. This was done ostensibly to
offset the theory advanced by the pros
ecution that the receipt of $30,000 by
Ruef from G. II. Umbsen in the Park
side trolley franchise matter was too
large a fee for legal services.
Mrs. Sage Plans Gift.
New York, Aug. 8. It is learned
from friends of Mrs. ilussell Sage that
she is thinking seriously of purchasing
Constitutional irland, in the upper
Hudson, opposite est Point, and pre
senting it to the United States govern
ment as a site on which to erect, the
world's greatest military preparatory
school, a school that will be to West
Point what Eton is to Oxford and
Lawrenceville is to Princeton. She is
very much in earnest about this pro
ject and is investigating the matter
very closely.
New Turkish Cabinet Named.
Constantinople, Aug. 8. The new
Turkish cabinet was named today by
the sultan, acting under the direction
of Kiamil Pasha. There is not a single
reactionary in the new cabinet, which
is composed of men wholly out of sym
pathy with the old regime. This is
considered as a guarantee that the
new constitution will be observed to
the letter, and there is gnat rejoicing
among the members of the Young Tur
key party.
Death Roll in Tabrix 800.
Tabriz. Aug. 8.- There has now been
35 days fighting in the streets of Ta
briz, and tho casualties, due chiefly to
bombs thrown from mortars and ihran-
nel, are estimated at 800. Many of
the finer residences of the city and
hundreds of shops in the basements
have been looted. The loos in this di
rection is placed at more than $1,000,
000.
ALL RUN DOWN.
Hiss Ih.'.t S.'rotbf, vA Mi J Com-
fLttly Lost Her Health, round
liilUfrom Pt-ru na at Once.
Read What She Says.
MISS IiKLLA BTROEDE, 710 Wen
mood Ht.. Apylctun, Wis., writes!
'For several years I was In a run
down condition, and I could find no re
lief from doctor and medicines. I
could not enjoy my tncal.s and could
not sleep at niht. I bad heavy, darlc
circles atxut the eyes.
'Mr friend were much slarmed. I
was sdvlxid to give Peruna a trial, and
to my Joy I Ix'in to Improve with tho
first bottlo. After taking six bottle I
felt completely cured. I cannot say too
much for lVruna as a medicine for
women In a run-down condition."
Pe-ru-na Did Wonders,
lira. Judzo J. F. Rover, 1121 Sherman
Ave.. Kvaiiflton, 111., says that she bo-
came run down, could neither eat nor
sleep well, and lost flesh and spirit. Re
runs did wonder for her, and she thanks
Reruns for new 11 f j and strength.
HOWAUD K. nrilTO.N Ayer erl Chemlnt.
lniiviilo, I'uloriui'k inion wli ft: Onl.l,
Hllvrr. L jul, l ; o.iia, Mlvr, J wuUl, Zluaor
ki.M-r,tl. t'v snnl '. lMilllignvlrp.- n4
full pru o lint lit ou !''!: -Mloa. Cunlrol mill I'm
pir work olIcllwL iiIfucl IuImu1 X
butial UmiiH.
WHEN YOU COME TO PORTLAND
ARRANGE TO STOP AT
THE CORNELIUS
PARK AND ALDEK STS.
A New and Modern European Hotel, catering
particularly to 8UU peopla. A refined place fur
ladies visiting- the city, close to the shopping
center. Rates reasonable. Free Du i.
I. L CURKE. (liti of Portland Hotol) Up.
A Rare Bargain
Douglas County Farm in the heart
of tho famous Shoestring Valley.
Sixty acres 45 acres cleared; 15
acres fir timber; soil rich and mel
low; no rocks; Bchoolhouso mile;
on county road; running water;
well; over !!(KJ bearing fruit trees;
5-room log house, barn and other
out-buildings; two miles of fence;
full assortment farm implements;
all house furnishings; all crops.
Must sell, Price for everything.
$2,500. Address
MRS. O. A. DCARING
Room 4 1 9, Corbett Bldg., Portland, Ore
"PN U Na330T"
W
II KN writ In sr to ad vertlsart please
mention this paper.
No Causa lor Alarm,
"Look, otllcer!" shouted tho excited
citizen. "Thut big department store Is
afire l"
"What makes you think so?" asked
the officer, calmly.
"Why, don't you see all those wom
an shoppers coming1 down the fire es
capes?" "Oh, yes; but that Is not the sign of
fire. You see, they enn't get through
the revolving doors with those big
hats."
No Stranger to That.
Mrs. Illghtmis I suppose at some time
In your life you struggled with the Nibe
lungenliiil? Mrs. 5nvell O. yes; I had an awful
slogs of thnt In 'M. I hnd to take all
kinds of nnsty medicines before I got It
out of my system.
Klila and float.
Iiottle Oooh! What's this pic
ture? Tommy That's dipt. Kldd an' his
band o' plruts.
Dottle An' which Is Cnpt. Kldd?
Tommy Wy, th' gy with th
goatee, o course! Cleveland leader.
ALt OlIOL 3 PUR ri p
Ac5c!ab!,?lTrpanilonrarAs
ling l'ic Sianacte aailWls i
rromofes Pi$retionflirc rfi
nvss and IVstrontains nciiiw
Upuru.Morphwc norJliacral
Mill AltlUllC.
jKx.Strmn e
Jaaanw tlnW.
Ancril'cl RVnwdv forCorKflra
Hon . Sour Stonucl.D!arriin
Yorrosrtwu!s'ion$JnTniii
ncss and Lo ss o r Sleep.
Tic Simile Sinarat of
NEW MJRK.
Eaact Cory of Wrarpcr.
jTj'J rmjrantf ed uitdTr'tbsTow' a '
-'l m fsit-1'! an" '
tVorklaai ?! Palleaf.
Ambassador Wu Tins Fuii was once.
It I Hll.-ie, telllnir ul-out a certain
selfish politician. lie sild: "The man
reminds me of a doctor of Slianml. A
mandarin came to this doctor for nd
vlce. lie could mt sleep, had no npio
tlte, suffered u hh deal from depres
sion und nevertheless was taking on
fat at an alarming rate. 'We'll soon
put you in condition at;" In,' said the
physician. 'What you need Is exercise
good, hard exercise. Pour times a
week you can coine here nnd put in tho
morning pollshlm; my Hoors.' 'Hut why
not my own Hours';' the mandarin In
quired. 'Mine, said the physician, 'are
larger.' "
A ltabl.ll anil a Whistle.
Ttl.l ...... L-. ...... !,. ,i u!i,.t-f ulwirn
whistle from the mouth would stop n
ruhblt? It surely does. Next time you
see little Molly Cottontail leap from her '
burrow and make off don't shoot; Just
whistle. Whether from fear or curios
ity I ennnot tell, but she will stop still
In her trucks. An antelope has been
known to do likewise. An African
hunter once said that the elephant Is
the most timid of all anlni ils and can
be frightened Into n cold sweat by .1
mysterious noise. New York Press.
riTC Ht. Vitas' Ounce and orvoos inaes-uw psrma
rll3BBtly tan ! lr. .ine's Ore I Nurve H
tnrer. Hnl for FREE $1 0 trial Imttle and tiwatlm.
Lr. H. U. kJiae. Ld., ii Arch bt.. f hilsdwlpUla, fa.
iS'rreaaary KornialHy.
Mrs. Ferguson George, what do you
have to do when you want to draw sums
money out of a Lank?
Mr. Ferguson You have to put somt
money In the lnk beforehand. That's
always been my exierience.
Mothers will And Mrs. WlnsloWs Boothia
yrup lh Ix s' rutnedv to Uaa lot tUelrck idia
lurluf the tveUiiug period.
la the Literary Workshop.
"Ilrooks," said IMrers, who had been
struggling desperately with an idea for
more tbnn half an hour, "give me a rhynia
for 'perfunctory.' "
"Sorry, old ninn," answered Brooks;
"but there Isn't any."
"Insh it!" exclaimed Itlvers.
Thereupon he proceeded to do it la
lilankety blank verse.
tl .'.V i 'V.
fk.. V v-." :
If ' ilr . Js
St. Helen's Ha!lf Portland, Or.
Resident and Day School for Girls.
Catalogue on Request.
BUSINESS
I'OKTLASl),
DEHNKE-WALKER STUDENTS SUCCEED. WHY?
They are Trained for buninens In a buainena-like way.
Why nut enroll in a rJUtalile school that places all of 1U graduates?
I. M. WALKER, Tree.
SEND rOR
MULE TEAM BORAX
by aofleatnd ttie water, cleans tha sLln tSornnhly, remove
odor ol perspiration aud readers tba akla aoit an J velvety.
All dealers. Sample Boras, Booklet and Lace Centerpiece c?e;jn on cloth
ready to work, lCc, of PACIFIC COAST BORAX CO., Oakland, Cal.
Local airenU wantnl. Write for money making plan.
Tbo Kind You Ilavo Always Douglit, nnd which lias been
ia use for over 30 years, lias borno tho sisnatnro of
and lias been mado imler bis per
CC,j&ty?i'i eonal eupcrrlslon slnco Its Infancy.
"rvr. Allow no ono to deceive you lu this.
All Counterfeits. Imitations nnd Just-ns-g'ood,nro but
Experiments that trlllo with nnd emlanfjer tho health of
Infants and Children Eipcrlcnco nalnst Uxpcruucnt
What is CASTORIA
Castorla Is a harmless tmhtltnto for Castor Oil, Pare
goric, Drops nnd Soothing Syrups. It Is Pleasant. It
contains neither Opium, Morphine nor other Xarcotlo
substance. Its nffo Is its guarantee. It destroys "Worms
nnd allays FeYcri.-dincss. It cures Diarrhoea and "Wind
Colic. It relieves Teething Troubles, cures Constipation
nnd Flatulency. It assimilates tho Food, regulates tho
Stomach and Dowels giving healthy nnd natural sleep.
The Children's Panacea Tho Mother's Friend.
GENUINE CASTORIA ALWAYS
7
Scars tho
W W
Tlie KM You Have Always Bought
In Use For Over 30 Years
ttavaea eaaMur, rt waaa araccr. mtm vaaa arra,
When the
Hair Falls
Then It's time to act! No time
to study, to read, to experi
ment! You want to save your
!hair, and save It quickly, tool 3
So make up your mind this!
very minute that if your hair
ever comes out you will use
Ayer's Hair Visor. It makes
the scalp healthy. The hair
stays In. It cannot do any
thing else. It3 nature's way.
Ths best kind cf a testimonial
'Coid lor over aiity years."
r J.
. '. jr Co., l.ow.11, Maae.
.i niaaufsvluxare e
7 f ABaPAILLL
yers
Pit I S.
CUjiltY FECT0EAL.
Deep S-a Amenities.
The Oyster You're a good deal tougher
customer tlian I am.
The Clam That's all right. You do a
good deal crookedcr shell game than I do.
A Hit of Ad t Ice.
This Is a bit of advice oifercd by tha
Gunnison Gazette:
Young man. If you should coma
across a girl who, with a face as radi
ant ns a sunflower, says as you appear
at the door, "I will he bu:y for half an
hour yet, for the dishes are not wash
ed," Just squat rlsht down on the door
step and wait for her. because soma
other chap may come along nnd secure
the prize, nnd right there you will hart
lost an angel.
IS OUR MOTTO
Said an Employer: "Stick to quality.
It will win out in the end." We do
"stick to quality." That is the reason
our graduates are so thorough and in
such demand. Investigate our claims to
superiority. Catalogue, business forms
and penwork free. Call, phone or write.
Portland liiiNiiics College
Tenth and Morrison, Portland, Oregon
A.. P. ARMSTRONG. LL. D., PRINCIPAL
COLLEGE
OKKUON
CATALOGUE
O. A. UOSSERMAN. See,
Up I f A Z
Is 1 r
fl Ii i.l Ii
I 1 1 V 1
Signature of
A