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About The Athena press. (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942 | View Entire Issue (Dec. 17, 1915)
THIS COUPON IB WORTH' :. , Twenty Dollars " Tin VERY BEST CHRISTMAS GIFT for YOUR BOY or YOUR GIRL U a Thorough Business College Education . Tbla ad 1i good for $20 on a complete Business Course If need by Jn. L 1916. Bareit, nd write today for particulars. ' UNK'S BUSINESS COLLEGE Tenth and MorrluM Ste., Portland, Ore. Lumber, Shingles, Lath. Moulding, Doom, Windojra and other Building Ma terial from Sam Connell Lumber Co. Portland, Oregon. Send us a list of what you require for your buildings and we will name you prices delivered at your station and Guarantee to save yon Money. BITTERLY OPPOSED Coast Aliens Raise Larce fund for New Revolution. EMPEROR YUAN K OPENLY DENOUNCED Dalles-Columbia Line Winter Schedule, Nov. 25 to Mar. 16. Steamers J. N. Teal and Twin Cltlea for Kenna wick, Pasco. Wallula. Umatilla, Arlington, The Pallea, Lyle, Hood River, White Salmon, Canon, Stevenson. Cascade Locke. Leave Portland Tuee daya and Friday! at 11 p. m. Freight and paaeen gera. Landing Taylor St. Dock. Portland. Double Tread Puncture Proof Tires Made from your old oneo, Laet long as Brand New TIRES Write na. OREGON VULCANIZING CO.. HO Washington St., Portland. Ore. LEARN WATCHMAKING Pleasant, profitable work not overdone: few monthi' learning: position! guaranteed: writ for reference! and particulara. Portland Watchmak ing. Engraving and Optical School, 818 Common wealth Building, Portland, Oregon. WEEKS' BREAK-UP-A-COLD TABLETS A guaranteed remedy for Colds and La Grippe. Price 25c of your druggist. It's good. Take nothing else. Adv. How to Be Happy Though Chleagoans A Chicago couple celebrated their fifty-ninth wedding anniversary some time ago. Believing their long years of wedlock have qualified them as ex perts on the subject, they have drawn up the following recipe for marital happiness and the Chicago "Tribune" nrinrn lr 1. Love each other all the time. 2, Keep silent when she wants to ar gue, a. Keep silent wnen ne wants to argue.' 4. Use good common sense In times of depression. 5. Don t blame your husband when he's dolog his best. 6. Don't scold. 7. Have a few children playing around the house. This married couple have lived up to the seventh of their commandments and now that their own youngsters have grown up they have seven grand' children and four great-grandchildren. And wo notice this detail of the re- oipe: these rules are applied to both parties, not Just to one of them. We ' haven't yet arrived at that stage of civilisation wherein we honestly apply the Golden Rule in all life's everyday relations, but applying some part of that Rule at home means having a home. Colliers. Papa's Nemesis. - Evelyn is cowardly and her father decided to have a serious talk with his little daughter. "Father," she said at the close of his lecture, "when you see a cow, ain't you 'frald?" "No!" with scorn. "Ain't you 'frald when It thunders?" "No," with laughUr. "Oh, you silly, Silly child." "Papa," said Evelyn solemnly, "ain't you 'frald of nothing In the world but mamma?" A Good Player. "Thump-rattlety-bang" went the , piano. "What are you trying to play, Jane?" called out her father from the next room. "It's an exercise from my new in struction book, 'First Steps In Music," she answered. "Well, I knew you were playing with your tuei, ne saia grimiy, out aou i step so heavily on the keys it dis turbs my thoughts." , Throngs Attend San Francisco Mass Meeting Head of Government Is Openly Called Traitor. - San Francisco The Chinese quarter here has gone on record as being not only opposed to the change of China's form of government from a republic to a monarchy, but determined to fight the proposed change In the affairs of the Flowery Kingdom. meeting to protest against Yuan Shi Kai's decision to accept the crown was called by Tong King Chong, president of the Chinese Republic as sociation and a former member of the Chinese senate. The time for the meeting found the Chinese quarter ablaze, the meeting place thronged and hundreds outside chattering excit edly and pressing in a vain effort to enter the overflowing hall. The overflowing audience broke up into a series of mass meetings and at every corner orators sang of the glory of republican governments and hurled verbal bombs at the head of Yuan Shi Kai, who was variously denounced as a traitor to China and the tool of Japan. "We will fight and die for our coun try," declared Tong King Chong, ad dressing the mass meeting. "Yuan Shi Kai has violated his oatn ana proved a traitor to the constitution. The Chinese republic must continue. We are prepared to back our words with war. We may not win even in this generation, but we will win anal ly." " It was decided at tne mass meeting to solict subscriptions from Chinese in all Darts of the world to finance a revolution which would have as its ob ject the permanent establishment of the Chinese republic, oeiore me meeting was over a large sum was subscribed, not only by those present but by Chinese who had been unable to get in, and who announced ineir bud scriptions by telephone. It was also decided to petition Presi dent Wilson that inasmuch as the Uni ted States had been among the first to recognize the Chinese republic, its recognition should be withheld from the restored monarchy. Eon-Old Mystery Solved by Fossil found in Bad Lands of Dakotas Ann Arbor, Mich. Dr. E. L. Trox- el, assistant curator of the museum of the University of Michigan, has just returned from the Bad Lands of the Dakotas, where he discovered a per fect mountable skeleton of a mesohip- pus, a three-toed horse, which roamed that country 2,000,000 years ago, and a partial skeleton of a pliohippus, a one-toed horse which . lived 1,000,000 years after the mesohippus was extinct. The pliohippus is the connecting link between the mesohippus and the mod ern horse. Dr. Troxel's discovery of the pliohippus is the only one on rec ord. Speaking of the pliohippus fos sil Dr. Troxel said: It's the biggest foSBil find in years. Its discovery will be extremely valua ble to science, for its discovery will clear up a long disputed question as to whether the pliohippus had one or three toes on each hind foot." Canned, "Is your wife putting up any fruit this summer?" "No, but I've canned a tew peaches myBelf." "You have," "Yes. I've had three different stenographers this year, and not one 'of them knew half as much about spelling and grammar as she did about the latest fashions." No Room For I. "Will you have a cherry or an olive in vour cocktail, major?" asked the host. ' Neither," replied the major. "They merely take up a lot of space that mlrrht lie better devoted to the Ukker.1 Cincinnati Enquirer. The Wise Fool. "Truth, crushed to earth, will rise again,' quoted the Bage. "Yes," responded the Fool. "But It seldom rises In time to get the num r of the joy rider's machine." X afr-t.,. C Gee Wo SwctMfal Hon ... Unuiim Hit ueMMful herb 1 lYmtxJtM euro all kinds of allmanta of man and women with out operation, umd from tha wondorful Gitnaaa horba. roota. buds ftnd veffeutbtaa, which art unknowa to we macircai aewnoa oi tnia country. Writ foe blank an 1 circular. Hand ttaino. CONSULTATION KUEfcl Addraaa He C Gee Wo Chinese Medicine Ci. 142 F1mt Bt, Portland. Oia Mention Papar. . N. tt No. Bl, ttll I WHEN wrtttac ft adrartiaara, alaaat m7 " ti thia aaaar. FATHER AND SON IN CRASHING; ENGINES MEET INSTANT DEATH Stockton, Cel. Two trainmen father and son were killed and scores of passengers badly shaken up in a head-on collision between the Santa Fe'a westbound passenger No. 6 and a freight special, No. 498, one mile east of Stockton shortly after 8 o'clock Sunday. W. A. Wing, Sr., engineer of the passenger, and W. A. Wing, Jr., his son, fireman of the freight, were in stantly killed, r Both engines, the mail car of the passenger, and two or three boxcars, were reduced to a tangled mass of splintered wood and twisted steel. Both locomotives, striaged .of cabs, smokestacks and bells, overturned on the south side of the track, the pass enger engine almost reversing its for mer position. KARL BUENZ " IMn i i nlm 1 Karl Buenz, managing director of the Hamburg-American line, convicted with other officials of the company of conspiracy to defraud the United States by false clearances and mani fests obtained by them for vessels chartered by the line for the purpose of taking supplies from American ports to German war vessels engaged In commerce destroying. Railroad men declared that they never before had heard of an engine being turned around In a wreck, al though they had seen many plunge in to the ditch at right:' angles to the track. . The mail car, with Mail Clerk J. A. Spalding inside, turned over on the north side of the track, tearing down a barn nearby in its plunge. Spalding crawled from under the wreckage without a scratch. Delays Vex Kitchener, Paris Earl Kitchener, the British secretary for war, the Temps says, was unfavorably impressed in the course of bis Mediterranean visit by the serious delays and diplomatic diffi culties which interfered with the expe dition to Saloniki The attempts to rescue the Serbians, It seemed to him, might have been tried elsewhere with more chance of success. These ideas were discussed at the Calais confer ence and then examined by the war council of the allies held under the presidency of General J off re. Oregon Building Is Taken, San Francisco Out of a triangular tangle of ownership Involving the Ore gon commission, the United States government and a local contractor. came the announcement that the Ore gon building at the Panama-Pacific ex position had been presented to the United States army as a clubhouse for officers at the ban Francisco Presidio. Representatives of the commission an nounced the building had been sold to a contractor for 11520. Then came news from Oregon that the buildins had been presented to the U. S. army. Christmas Paroles Up. Olympia, Wash. The state prison board will hold its special "Christmas meeting" at Walla Walla next week to enable prisoners eligible for parole to obtain releases before the Christ mas holidays. Mrs. Linda Burn eld H guard, fasting practitioner, sen tenced to two to 20 years for man slaughter, following conviction for be ing responsible for the death of one of her patients, is the most noted prison er before the board. Her minimum sentence expires December 26. NORTHWEST MARKET REPORTS; GENERAL CROPJJONDITIONS American Ship Is "Enemy.". Hamburg -The prise court which has before it the case of the American ship Pass of Balmaha has decided to treat her as "an enemy vessel." It is annouced that the evidence has estab lished that the ship was under the British flag until the end of 1914 and was sold to an American company after the outbreak of the war. The Pass of Balmaha was captured while on her way to Archangel, Russia, with cargo of cotton. Christmas Mail Sails. . New York American Christmas mail to Europe, the last of which was dispatched Monday, consisted of 8550 sacks. The sacks carried, in addition to ordinary letters, 90,600 registered articles, 34,900 parcel post packages and 284,457 money orders. The money orders represented $3, 168,797, an increase over the Christ mas mail for 1914 of $1,467,704. The largest amount to go to any in dividual country was $1,669,930 to Great Britain. Germany will receive $228,323. Brewery Men to Stay. Aberdeen, Wash. The decision of the State Supreme court upholding the dry law will result in the closing here January 1 of a brewery and 86 saloons. The machinery of the Aberdeen Brew ery company, valued at $200,000, will be shipped to California. Most of the 40 employes will stay here. , Several of the office men are inter ested in a clam cannery and others will become interested ' in a nata- torium, to be erected at a cost of $16,000. Liquor Men Get Ready. Eureka, Cal. The board of super visors has received an application from the Astor Wine company, of Horn brook, seeking a license to conduct a wholesale liquor house. Hornhrook being near the state line, the whole sale liquor houses are counting on a large business when Oregon and Wash ington become dry. ' The names of 380,000 tipplers in Oregon are cata logued and indexed by another mail order liquor house that is preparing to open in Hornbrook. - Bankers Get Five Years. Dubuque, la. Joseph Harrigan, ex- vice president; George Homan, ex cashier, and Charles Siege, ex-teller in the Dubuque National bank, were sen tenced in the United States district court to five years each in the Federal penitentiary at Fort Leavenworth. The three former bank officials pleaded guilty to charges of having made false entries on the books of the bank and misappropriating funds approximating $16,000. Portland Wheat Bluestem, 98c bushel; forty-fold, 97c; club, 94c; red Fife, 91c; red Russian, 91Je. . Millfeed Spot prices: Bran, $23 ton; shorts, $24; rolled barley, $30 31. - ' Corn White, $85 ton; cracked, $36. Hay Eastern Oregon timothy, $15 16; valley timothy, $1213; alfalfa, $13.6014.60; cheat, $910; oats and vetch, $1112. Vegetables Artichokes, $1 dozen; tomatoes, California, $1.2601.50; cab bage, 90c cart; garlic, 15c pound; peppers, E8c; eggplant, 10c; sprouts, 9c; horseradish, 84c; cauliflower, 76c $1.26 dozen; celery, S065c; beans, 12 15c poUDd; lettuce, $2 2.75 crate; peas, 1216c pound. Green Fruits Apples, 75c2.25 box; pears, $1.251.75: grapes, $1.85 1.60 crate; cranberries, $1011.60 barrel. Potatoes Oregon, $11.16 sack; Yakimas, $1.101.26; sweets. $2.60 cwt - " . Onions Oregon, buying price, $1 f. o. b. shipping point' ' " Eggs Oregon: ranch, buying prices: No. 4, 42c dozen; No. 2, 80c; No. 3, 20c. Jobbing prices: No. 1, 4244c dozen; Oregon storage, 2628c Poultry Hens, 11 13e pound; springs, lli2a; turkeys, 17c; tur keys,, dressed, -2022cj. ducks, 12 15c; geese, 89e. " ;-v. - V Butter City creamery, cubes, ex tras, selling at 81ie; firsts, 29c; prints, and cartons, extra. -Prices paid to producers :" Country creamery, 2428c; butterfat, premium quality, 33c; No. 1, average quality, 81c; No. 2,29c. Veal Fancy, 9c pound,' Pork Block, 771e pound. :. Hops 1916 crop, 1012Ji pound. -Wool - Eastern Oregon, 18 26c pound; valley, 2626c; fall lambs' wool, 25c; mohair, Oregon, 28c Cascara bark Old and new, 814c pound. Cattle Choice steers, $7 7.26; good, $6.767; medium, $6.506.75; choice cows, $5.256.76; good, $5 6.25; medium, $4.505; heifers, $3.60 6; bulls, $35; stags, $4.605.26. Hogs Light, $6.95(86.06; heavy, $4.905. Sheep Wethers, $4.756.50; ewes, $46; lambs, $67.60. . Hog Raiser Raps Prices. Spokane Packers in the northwest have virtually cornered the pork mar ket and are holding down prices, with the result that farmers who produce hogs are going to be forced to pass up northwestern markets and sell in the east, according to I. H. Jorgens, presi dent of the Union State bank of Nez Perce, and a hog raiser. Mr. Jorgens says hog raising is becoming an im portant industry In the Nez Perce country. . "Our section ships three to five cars of hogs every Tuesday from Nez Perce, and tuey go mostly to Seattle and Spo kane," said Mr. Jorgens. . "Packers now are paying only five cents a pound, which we regard as much too low, the present high prices of grain considered. We must have $5.76 to $6 a hundred to make the business profitable. "The packers seem to think they have a corner on the market and are taking advantage of it. Our hog raisers will be forced to sell in the east If northwestern prices do not im prove, or they must go out of business. We have shipped hogs east from Nez Perce before and have realized more than in northwestern markets and we may be forced to do so again." Flour Goes Soaring. All local grades of flour is advanced 20 cents a barrel. This put the whole sale price of patents at $5. .There is a similar advance in the Puget Sound market The rise occasioned by the strength and higher price of wheat A year ago the "patent flour market stood at $6. Influenced by the war flights ' of the wheat market: flour prices climbed rapidly until February 6, 1916, when they touched $7.20, the record quotation for the Portland mar ket, the extreme price was not beta Ions- and the market began to fall steadily until September 21, when it reached $4.80. which price has been maintained up to this time. WILTING FOR PEACE, BUT GERMANY WILL NOT TAKE FIRST STEP Berlin So lonfas uncontrolled ha tred of Germany and the belief that Germany Is approaching a .collapse continues to be the dominant idea of her foes, it would be folly for Germany to take the initiative in t proposing terms of peace. -. Germany, however, is ready at any time to consider a peace suggestion from the countries with which she is at war, does not wish a continuation of the war and disassociates herself under these cir cumstances from any responsibility for Its prolongation. This is the substance of the German Imperial Chancellor's reply in the Reichstag to the Socialist interpella tion on peace, in which he painted a picture of Germany triumphant on all sides and supplied with everything, even if not in abundance, necessary to THEODORE E. BURTON ' Help Reaches Minnesota. San Francisco The wreaking steamer Iaqua and the tug Dauntless, sent from here last Friday to the assistance of the Minnesota, reached the disabled steamer at 8 o'clock Wed nesday morning and took her in tow, according to a radio message from the lanua received here by C. W. Wiley, . . . i ii . marine superintendent oi me ureai Northern Setamship company. The message, Wiley said, came from the Iaqua, and, although he expected word from the Minnesota, he had heard nothing at a late hour Wednesday. Three Cutters Recommended. Washington, D. C.-rTwo cutters for work on the Pacific Coast and In Alas kan waters, one for the harbor of New York and another for San Francisco harbor are recommended In the annual report of the Coast Guard just sent to congress. The cost of all these vessels is not definitely given, but apparently would be more than $600,000. The port favors early rebuilding of the 279 stations of the Coast Guard. Sea-Flghtlng at Long Range. The fight in the North Hea began twelve miles away. When the Blue--cher was struck, she was ten miles from her EngliBh enemy, when von Spee and Craddock fought off Chile, they opened fire at a distance of 12, 000 yards; and Craddock had old fashioned obsolete ships. If old-fashioned obsolete ships open fire at 12,000 yards, what the superdreadnougnts can do, may be guessed. What they can do, experts say frankly, is throw a 2000-pound projectile twenty-five miles with such accurate range-finders that the deflection will be only twenty yards for six miles. In fact, the im provement and change in naval equip ment has been so swift and revolu tionary that the life of a battleship has been rated first rank for only five years. In speed. In size. In armor proof, and big gun fire, the changes have come so fast since 1905 that the nations had either to fight it out or cripple themselves financially building bieeer and bigger monsters or tne sea and oddly enough, the changes all date from a little "cheese box on a floating saucepan," the Monitor of Civil War fame. From the time the Monitor and the Merrlmac spat out their fire-cracker shots at each other. It has been a race among the nationa for speed, ar mor proof, big guns, and long range. Those best informed declare that the big gun and speed have rendered sec ondary both armor proof and subma rine; but these are disputes that will be finally settled in the present war. Neither side -has had any monopoly of courage. The courage of both sides has been magnificent, almost terri ble, but speed and the big gun have won. From "What Sea Power Means to England," by A. C. Laut, in the American Review of Reviews for De cember. : : ... ,-; - . ' For Every Kind of Lamensss A Mi kSk RubltoaaaJ , V Rubhln. X Thorough!? HAN FORD S Balsam of Myrrh ALINIMG NT For Cub, Burnt, Bruises, Sprains. Strains, Stiff Neck, Chilblains, Lame Back, OldSores, Open Wounds, Aj j -ii . 1 : v ana cut eamstiuu uijui ica. Mario RWi ItUfi MwboiUr I1MUV w WSJ . Mllf B . . Pric 25c, 50c and $1.00 Sack, NX The candidacy of former . Senator fheodore E,, Burton of Ohio, for the Republican nomination for the presi dency, received a considerable Impetus by the formal withdrawal of Governor Willis of Ohio from the race, and his announcement that, he would throw his support to Mrv Burton. the continuation of the war. The interpellation was introduced by Dr. Schneidemann, in the following terms: Is the Imperial Chancellor ready to give Information aa to the conditions under which he would be willing to enter Into peace negotiations?" If our enemies make proposals compatible with Germany's dignity and safety," said Dr. von Bethmann Hollweg, "then we shall always be ready to discuss them. So long as in the countries of our enemies the guilt and ignorance of statesmen are en tangled with confusion of public opin- it would be folly for Germany to make, peace proposals, which would not shorten, but would lengthen the war. First the masks must be torn from their faces." Onlv two Socialists spoke on the in terpellation, all the non-Socialist par ties uniting in a short declaration op posing discussion at this moment Lne tone of the debate was dignified and patriotic and the Imperial Chancellor was followed attentively and respect fully excent for occasional interrup tions and outbursts oi laugnier irom the Socialist. Dr. Liebknecht who has not been in accord with his party since the beginning of the war, and who re ceived no svmsathv. The Imrjerial Chancellor In his nrsi aneech. lasting half an hour, expiamea the military situation on an ine irom and declared emphatically that Ger many could not be starved out The country had enough food, if properly distributed. Germany's enemies, he said, were suffering more than the Germans, and paying higher prices for food. Movable Coast Guns Likely, Washington, D. a Gigantic guns mounted on motor trucks or railway cars probably will be added to the rnuntrv'a coast defense system as result of experiments now being made bv armv ordnance experts. It is learned that a scheme is being worked out for establishing mobile batteries to protect stretches of coast line not commanded by fortifications. The European war has demonstrated that high-power guns can be used as mobile weapons, tier many'a 42-centimeter howitzer having revolutionized land warfare. THAT GOLD YOU HAVE may bring sickness, doctors bills and. loss of work; you know that serious sickness usually starts with a cold, and cold , only exists where weakness exists. Remember that. ' ' Overcome the weakness and nature cures the cold that is the law of reason, Careiifly avoid drugged pills, syrups or stimulants;- they are only props and braces and whips. It ij the pure medicinal nourishment, in Scott's Emulsion that quickly en riches the blood, strengthens the lungs and helps heal the air passages. . And mark this well Scott's Emul sion generates body-heat as protection against winter sickness. Get Scott's at your drug store to-day. - It always strengthens and builds up. -. 14-51 Scott ft Bowse. Eloomfirld. N.J. . 8ure of Help. , ? The boy was Very small and the load he was pushing in. the wheelbar row was very, very big. f ' A benevolent old gentleman, put ting down his bundles, lent him a helping hand. -: "Really, my - boy," he puffed, don't see how you manage to get that barrow up the gutters alone.' : "I don't," replied the appreciative kid. Dere's always some jay a-standln around as takes it up for me." All Dealers OB WRITH " 0. C. Hsirford Mft Go. SVfiAOUBS,H. X.7 TYPHOID ? do more neceaaarv than Smallpox. Atmy experience ba! demonMritea the alnioat mlraculouf efll- Caey, and barraletrnese, of Antityphoid Vaccination. Be vaccinated NOW by your phyilclan, yon an lour family. It Is more vital than house Insurance. Ask your physician, druaelst, or lend for Heva yon had Typhoid?" telling of Typhoid Vaccloa, t KSults from use, and danger f icm Typhoid Cairleie. THE CUTTER LABORATORY, BCBriCLCY, CAL saoawciae vacciass aaiauaauaesa u. e.eev.ucseel Pay $10,000,000 for Poodles. "The most astounding extravagance of the women of America la that we spend $10,000,000 each year for poodles." Mrs. R. L. Barker told this to the delegates to the annual meeting of the Women's International Missionary union in New Orleans In describing how American women make the money fly. She continued: "We spend more for hats yearly than It takes to support the army and navy and several other federal depart- ments. We also' spend $107,000,000 for soft and cooling drinks and $178, 000 for candy. It is time to call, a halt and to return to the sane ways of our mothers.'' ". - ; . He Was The kan. . A colored man called at Mrs. Bai ley's looking for work. . . "What is your name?" she asked, after hiring him. "Man name is Poe, ma'am," was the answer. "Poe!" she exclaimed. "Perhaps some of your family worked for Edgar Allan Poe; did they?" - - The colored man opened his eyes wide with amazement "Why why, ma'am," he said, as he pointed a dusky finger at himself "why, Ah am Edgar Allan Poel" - A Problem. Little Elizabeth and her mother were having luncheon together and the mother, who always tried to im press facta upon her young daughter, said: "These little sardines, Elisabeth, are sometimes eaten by the larger fish." - Elizabeth gazed at the sardines In wonder and then asked: - But, mother, how do the large, flan get the cans open?" . 4 ' Republicans Win In Bay State, . Boston Republicans were success ful where national party lines were drawn in the elections In 14 Massa chusetts cities Tuesday. In Marlboro and Waltham Democratic mayors were defeated for re-election by Republican opponents. Republicans won in Brock ton, Northampton, Pittsfield and Qulncy. In rail Kiver, springneia and Haverhill no mayors were elected, but the Republicans secured a major ity in the city government in the two former cities. Haverhill has a non partisan government v Trenches Bad as Roundup. Pendleton, Or. William Darby, a former Pendleton boy, now a soldier in the English army, has written to friends here from Kent Darby, who was recently wounded in three places. has fully recovered from his wounds and is ready for the trenches again. He says that he is happy aa can ba and that every man faces death much as does a man getting on the famous Roundup bucking horse, Long Tom. Darby Intends to return to Pendleton. One Man Maul's Students. Russellville, Ark. Following the second strike within ten months of the students of the Second District State Agricultural college, the strikers way laid President Scott at night and at tempted to chastize him with a razor strap. President Scott said he was overpowered by overwhelming num bers, but that he administered vastly more punishment than ne received, tie la of powerful physique, and the black eyes and bruised and swollen features of some of the students corroborated the president's assertion. British Vote Hits Liquor. London A rebuke to the liquor in terests was seen in the re-election Sat urday to the house of commons of Postmaster General Herbert Samuel over Henry Knight a printer of Leeds. In a bve-election in tbe Cleveland di vision of North Riding, Yorkshire, he poled 17312 votes as against Knights 1453. Mr. Knight opposed recent en actments restricting liquor sales, de claring he repneented the eorwensoa of opinion among the laboring classes. Inaulted. k LGriKgsby at the club id need to spend nearly 1 don't anv more. nil Vila time there. !- "Yes. but when some oi the otner boys suggested that he ought to spend something else besides his time once in a while be got mad and resigned." Extraordinary. -Kind Old Lady I'm sure you won't mind my asking you, but are yon a relative of Captain Jones, of MudfordT The Officer Madam, I am captain Jones of Mudford. Kind Old Lady Ah, then, that ac counts for the extraordinary resem blance! London Opinion. - Not Particular. Brown Did I leave au umbrella here yesterday? - Barber What Kind oi an umoreiiat Brown Oh, any kind at all. I'm not fussy. Boston Globe. ' Not-A Thought Promoter. - "You" must admit that my speech has stirred a lot of people up," re marked the orator - (. . 'Yes," replied his friend, "you have stirred 'em up all right. . Your appeal to sentiment and emotion ought to set them to thinking." "That Isn't the purpose. Remember I am an impassioned leader. I depend on ' unquestioning obedience. My method is to get em so excited that they can't think and will take. my. word for it" Washington Star, . t, O ! -I . ' . ' . r vol v oimuiv. "How can you sell these shirts for 98 cents If they are worth two dol lars apiece, as you say they are?" "It's like this. The goods were so popular that the manufacturer could not make them fast enough to supply the demand, so he tailed, and we bought his entire stock at a sacrifice." Provoking. The Professor Humph! Dear me! I gave that young man two courses on the cultivation of the memory and he's gone away and forgot to pay me, and I can't for the life of me remem ber the fellow's name. How provok ing! Strenuous. Abner Well, Jay, how d'ye like It up t' the city? Jay Aw, It was all right enough most ways, but what bothered me most was tryln' to look at everybody I met on the street Puck. Relaxation. "What did your husband think of the ball game?" "Oh, he doesn't go there to think. He just hollers." Distemper Puts a ... Stop to all - CURES THE SICK And prevents others having the disease no matter how exposed. 60 centa and SI a bottle, SS and S10 a doion bottle. All good drustiata and turt goods house. SPOHN MEDICAL CO., Cham lata and Bacteriologists, Goahen, tnd., U. S. A. . Spoilsport "Young man," said the magistrate severely, "the assault you have com mitted on your wife was most brutal. Do you know of any reason why I should not send you to prison?" "If you do, your honor," replied the prisoner at the bar, hopefully, "it will break up our honeymoon." Phil adelphia Ledger. NtW MODERN DANCING. " B. Fletcher Hallamora. the leading Danctng Br Bert and Instructor in New York City, write.: 1 have need ALLEN S FOOT-EASE, the antaeptk powder to be ahuicen into th. h, for ten years, and recommend it to all my pupils-" It cure and prevents sore feat. Sold by all Drug and Depart ment Stores. 25c Sample FREE. Addraaa, Allan B. Olmatad. La Roy. N. Y. Not Guilty. "Do you know that that young man who Is going to marry your daughter la an Inveterate gambler?" "Nothing of the sort He merely thinks he is. Why, I trimmed him out of fifteen dollars myself at stud poker the other night" . Had to Follow. Jim had looked In at the country livery stable in search of a Job. He seemed promising and was Set to work greasing the axles of a carriage. In a remarkably short space of time he reported the task finished. "Look here," said his new boss, "d'ye mean to say you've greased all tour of them wheels already?" "Weel," rejoined the new hand, "Aa've greased the two front ones." "And why haven't you greased the two hind ones?" "Weel," exclaimed Jim, calmly, "se lang aa the two front ones gans all reet, the two hind ones hev to toller." Apt Title. "This collar stnd la my own inven tion," said the' Cheap Jack, "and the name I have given it Is 'Fault' " "Because everybody has faults?" suggested the red-nosed man In the crowd. "No, my dear sir;" simply because It's so easy to find." Not Gray Haira tanttireel Eyea Make a took oldear Saawa ars. ddagw and Doll Eye tali-taka. Btariae lye BeaMay Cassanny, easasge. I UontTell After Una Movie go bona and Murlo) Tourym Two Drop ' will reat, refresh sad clean. Have tt bandy, aravacea.