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About The Athena press. (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942 | View Entire Issue (Dec. 3, 1915)
ANNOUNCEMENT to our throughout the Pacific Northweet: ESS? HOTEL OREGON has bum ptsosd under the manarement of N. K. Clarke, who vu for many year connected with the Portland, Corneliui and Seward Bote la, and who will always extend to all a cordial welcome. . Commencina: NoTember 1st we shall in- auaiirato the A dm ri can plan in connection with th European plan. We solicit your patronage. American Plan, $3 to $5 per day . European Plan, $1 per day up. " . N. K. CLARKE, Mgr. , FOUNDATION OF BUSINESS SUCCESS Walker Education. Often have haJ all the children ot a family 'one at- I ter another enrolled to acquire Hualneee Education proof; ot the value of a JBehnka-Walker Educa tion. CoarHtlaBanMM. Shorthand. Pcnraanibfa, Trictraahr. Day and aiibt Kbool. f Milloei wbea oaoipemL Write for eamiof. . BUSINESS LLEGE A Practical Application. "When Josh got home tram his edu cation," said Farmer Corntossel, "he started right In instructin' me about agriculture. So I dldn t lose no time to try him out." . "What did you dor" "Sent him out to round up a warm ot bees." "Was the experiment successful?" . "Some. It didn't hurt the bees none, an' kep' Josh from gettln' In the way fur 'most two weeks." New York Post Narrow Escape. "See here, you. Tou were talking in your sleep last night about a dear and a perfect love." "It refers," explained her husband, "to a perfect love of a hat I am think In of buying for you." She looked at him suspiciously, but told htm to have it sent up. Louis ville Courier-Journal. Beauty and Wealth Mffi SSrf !?: attain Jxthv Fullfnitructions. Scores of valuable formulas. Beautify yourself. Start a Beauty Shop. Start manufacturing Beauty Specialties. All of these opportunities are open to you. Com nlt system. 1.00 dm copy. Particulars FREE. Purack Specialty Co,, 828 Cham. Com., Portland MEN'S AND WOMEN'S Shoes $2S-$3ffl I; ALL STYLES AND ALL SIZES We also carry a complete line of High Tops, Loggers' and Men's work Sftoes, at uut Kate races, Royal Shoe Co. 229 Morrison Street, Between Tint and Second Sts. . PORTLAND, OREGON 3i NO MEDICINE If you are ailing In anyway, and want help, write me. DR. L. M. DAVIS, 129Vi Rosssl street, Portland, Oregon, . ,- WEEKS' BREAK-LP-A-COLD TABLETS A guaranteed remedy for Colds and La Grippe. Price 26c of your druggist. It's food. Take nothing else. Adv. We pay cash ggs, etc Remit at ones and deduct no commis sion. Ship us your veal, hoars, noultry. CI I T HAKH.LT. 107 Front St. Portland, Oregon 55 Valuable Formulas, Tricks, Illusions, and Household Hints In our Interesting magazine for two issues, ttenc Complete for Jackson Co.. S28 Chamber Commerce, Portland, Ore. 10c o Double Tread Puncture Proof Tires Made from your old ones. Last long as Brand New TIKES Write us. OREGON VULCANIZING CO., 560 Washington St., Portland, On. LEARN WATCHMAKING -Pleasant, profitable work not overdone; few months' learning; positions guaranteed; write for references and particulars. Portland Watchmak ing, Engraving and Optical 8chool, 218 Common wealth Building, Portland, Oregon. Dalles- Columbia Line Winter Schedule, Nov. 25 to Mar. IS. Steamers J. K. Teat and Twin Cltlci for Kenne wick, Pasco, Wallula, Umatilla, Arlington, The Dallee. Lylo. Hood Hiver. White Salmon. Carson. Sterenson, Cascade Locke, Leave Portland Tues days and Fridays at 11 p. m. Freight and passes gen. Landing Taylor St. Dock, Portland. . Letter for Letter. "Why does a poet begin so many of his sentences with '0'?" said the poli tician. "There's no answer," replied Mr. Penwlggle. "Why does a speechmaker begin so many ot his sentences with 'I'?" Washington Star, Outclassed. "Were you much Impressed by the majestic roar of Niagara?" "I was at first, but later on, when my husband put up a roar about our hotel bill, Niagara sounded like a rip pling brook." A Good Actor. "Hamfat is out of a Job. Tou re member that fellow who used to play the part of a butler so well." "I remember him. He was good. I should think he could get a Job as a real butler." Kansas City Journal. Way to Win. "I have always been unlucky In life." "Me, too." "Yet you are very successful." "Well, as soon as I got the idea that rack would do nothing for me I began to hustle." Louisville Courier-Journal. Then th Riot Call. Once in a great while you hear a vaudeville Joke that Is probably not more than 40 or 50 years old. Put Pepsin In It. Mlladl says did you ever stop to think how hard everybody would try to get religion If It was good for indigestion. The Main Difficulty. The management of a factory re cently engaged a new man and gave Instructions. to the foreman to instruct blm In his duties. A few days after ward the manager inquired whether the new man was progressing with his work. . The foreman, who had not agreed very well with the man in question. exclaimed angrily: "Progressing? . There's been a lot of progress. I have taught him every thing I know and he Is still an ig norant fool." Chicago Herald. Vow Cm Get Allen, root-feu furE. Writ. AlleuB. Olmjted.L. Roy, N. Y.,fora lro sample ol Allen', Foot-Hue. It cures sweating, hot swollen, aching feet. It makes new or tight shoes easy. A certain cur. (of corns. Ingrowing nails and bunions. All drug gist faint, 26c. Don't accent any nbstitut., That's So. "What were the Janizaries?" "Soldiers maintained by the ancient Turks. They trained them to be sol diers from boyhood." "I'll bet they had no trouble in re cruiting, either. Everybody wants to be a soldier at 10." Louisville Courier-Journal, ' Campus Invitations. .. Femade Voice over the Wire Hello Oeorgel Can you come to a little party this evening? George (absent-mindedly I'd like to, but I'm on the wagon. Chaparral. Fears Confirmed. Carraway was craning his neck for a better view of the turkey. "Rubber 1" said the landlady. "I feared as much," said Carraway with a sigh. Judge. Let ns toll yon FREE of 24 new wars to make money. It may be tha beginning of financial In dependence. Address, Purack Specialty Co., S2g Chamber of Commerce. Portland, Ore. One Profession Tabooed. "I suppose you have high ambitions for your boy?" "Well, I wouldn't say that, exactly, but I do hope that he won't turn out to be the male assistant to a female dancing teacher." Error Confounded. Conductor We're traveling in two sections tonight. Intoxicated Passenger Thatsh right. Justh whash I've been trying to tell m' friends. I can see both ahectlons ot you, too, co'ductor. Machinery Better Than Men. She A clock is. different from a man. He In what respect? She When it strikes it keeps on working. No Enterprise. Junior Partner I think Mars Is In habited. Senior Partner Until this war Is over, Jake, we will stick to our regu lar customers! Philadelphia Bulletin. A Prepared Speaker. "Mrs. Judktn read a paper before the suffrage elub yesterday after noon." "Did It show careful preparation?" "No; but Mrs. Judkln did." Birm ingham Age-Herald. - 7 i i ii inn Try this easy way to ' 41 a at . si ' . clear your skin with gsi roi Bathe your face (or several minutes, with Resinol Soap and warm water, working the creamy lather into the skin gently with the finger-tips. Then wash off with more Resinol Soap and warm water, finishing- with a dash ol clear cold water lo close the pores. Do this once or twice day, and you will be astonished how quickly the heihng. antiseptic Resinol medication soothes and cleanses the pores, re moves pimples and blackheads, and leaves the completion clear, fresh and velvety. . If the skin Is In bad condition through neglect or an unwise use ol cosmetics, apply a little Resinol Oii.t ment and let it remain on ten min utes before the final washing with Resinol. Soap, '',- Ktsaoot Sea la aot arUlcUlly colorta, Its rick brown be lag entirely due to Ins Rtwnel balsaes. It f oaiaiaa, hold by ail dragtlsta en, dtsitts 10, toutt goods for Ire. aantpia esse an, Intl ol Rtunnl Ointment, write lleot. a-r, Kesuwij CbomlealOo.. Baltlaaon. aid. Physicians Amt prtsc nbid Rtsixol Oixtmmtfor0.tr twenty yiars in tk trialmrnt ostiH and scalp affettumt. WHEAT IN STORAGE IS Canadian Government Suddenly Seizes Cereal Crop. GRAIN REQUIRED BY GREAT BRITAIN Order Affects 20,000,000 Bushels in Eastern Elevators Price Not Yet Fixed by Dominion. Ottawa, Ont. ThCanadian govern ment has commmandeered all high- grade wheat In elevators from Fort William, on Lake Superior, to the At lantic coast. The action was taken under the spe cial war 'act by the Canadian Grain commission. The wheat seized was 01 grades No. 1 hard and Nos. 1, 2 and 3 northern. It was the property ol grain- shippers and millers. That taken is all which on Saturday night was in the public elevators at Fort William, Fort Arthur, Midland, Tiffin, Port Mc- Nichol, Collingwood, Coderich, Kings ton, Fort Colborne, Prescott, Quebec St. John, Montreal and Halifax. A revised estimate places the amount at about 20,000,000 bushels. A considerable amount is the property of American grain dealers. . . The grain was taken Saturday night, so that . gram exchanges should be affected as little as possible. It is officially announced that the price will be fairly adjusted and the graingrow- era paid promptly by the Canadian government. ; It is estimated that there still is in Canada, in the hands of farmers and dealers west of Fort William, 150,000,000 bushels surplus of wheat available for export. It is expected that most of this will be taken in the future for the use of Great Britain, France and Italy. The domestic, supply of Russia is more than sufficient to meet the needs of that country.-- Had the Dardanelles been forced, the surplus of Russian wheat would have made the present action unnecessary. t While the wheat Just taken was commandeered to fill an oder from the British government for a large quan tity of wheat, it is understood that most of it will be shipped to Italy. The Canadian government will look after the transportation of the grain to the Atlantic seaboard and from there its shipment across the Atlantic will be undertaken by the British gov ernment in the same way that ship ments of oats and hay have been hand led for the past year. German Object in Serbia Gained and Operations Close Berlin, via London With there oc cupation of Rudnik, the capture of 2700 prisoners and the flight of the scanty remainB of the Serbian army into the Albanian mountains, Ger many's operations against . Serbia have been brought to a close, says the offi cial statement issued at the headquar ters of the general staff. . The object of these operations the opening of communications with Bul garia and the Turkish empire has been accomplished, it is asserted. London The greater portion of what remains of the Serbian northern army is believed to have crossed. Into the mountains of Albania and Monte negro, where the Serbs are continuing, with the aid of King Nicholas troops and supplies, which are reaching them from the Adriatic, to offer stern resis tance to the Austro-German and Bul garian invaders. Like the Belgains, however, the Ser bians hold only a fringe of their coun try, which widens as it reaches the southwestern corner, of which Monas tir is the center. For some reason, variously ex plained, the Bulgarians have halted their march on Monastir. It is said in some dispatches that, having reoccu- pled part of Macedonia, largely in habited by their fellow nationals, the Bulgarian people and government are disinclined to push any farther west Oil Men Join In Prayer. ' " Taft, Cal The oil men here took refuge in prayer and practically every body connected with the oil industry in this vicinity went to church Sunday to hear a sermon preached by Rev. Luther A. Rice on the subject of "False Conservation." The sermon dealt with the order of ex-President Taft withdrawing certain oil lands and the effect on the California industry and this district, where the withdrawn lands are situated, in particular. The congregation was asked to pray that congress pass remedial legislation, 81,042,743 in Postal Bank. Washington, D. C. Only six cities In tha United States have greater de posits in postal savings banks than Portland, and Portland's deposits are more than double those of any other city in the Northwest The statement just Issued gives Portland's deposits as 11,042,743, only 1100,000 less than that of San Francisco. Other North western postal banks having more than 1100,000 In deposits are: Seattle, 1420,975; Tacoma, (418,207; Astoria, $135,748; Bellingham, $121,236; Spokane, $112,184. T. R.'s Aid Held as Spy. New Britain, Conn The Rev. Fred erick Krelger, of this city, who has been engaged in missionary work in East Africa for many years, is being detained in a British prison camp in India on the suspicion that he Is a Ger man spy, according to information eeived by relatives here. During ex-President Roosevelt's hunting trip in Africa, the Rev. Mr. Krelger accompanied him on several occasions. For a Galled Horse Him Working HAN FORDS Balsam of Myrrh A LI Nl Mat N't For Galls. Wire Cut. Lameness, Strain. Bunches, Thrush. Old Sores. Fistuia. Bleediiur. Etc Etc Made Since 1846. "IZT Price 25c, 60c and $1.00 , OR WRIT! All Dealers syasM? tl Headright on Fountain Pen. , An Inventor conceived the Idea of making an electric lamp to be carried in thevest pocket, which had mwh the appearance of a fountain pen, the lamp being very slightly larger than the other. This probably offered a tip to a rival Inventor, who proceeded to make an article which is both lamp and pen. -. - ... . . Little is added to the proportions of the implement, and the ink reservoir shares space in the cylindrical, case with a tiny dry battery. The lamp is mounted just over the pen point, with a tiny reflector, which directs the full strength of the lamp's glow down on the manuscript at the point where the pen is gliding over Its surface, - Til PiowA'a Ppllota RmatI O nrmr. coated, easy to take as candy, regulate ana invigorate siomacn, uver ana Dow els. Do not gripe. WRITF STflRIFSI ForMoirln, Picture,. Pro Tl MIL 31UMU! ducer. oay from 126 to 1100 each for Photoplays. Interesting and fascinating. No experience necessary. Work in spare time. Pull particulars Free. Purack Specialty Co.. 328 Chamber of Commerce. Portland. Ore. What She Needed. : Lady What will you charge me fcr the use of a horse and buggy for a few hours? Liveryman It will cost you $2 for the first hour and $1 for each addi tional hour. Lady Well, I'll use It for two ad ditional hours. I've got some shop ping to do, and will not require' it for the first hour. SAsvtwaiMaT srar a? Is natal breathing impaired I Doe year throat get husky or clogged? Modern science proves that these symptoms re sult from ran-down health. Snuffs and vapors are irri tating and useless. The oil-food In Scott's Emulsion will enrich and enliven the blood. aid nutrition and assist nature to check the inflammation and heal the sensitive membranes. Shan Alcoholic mtxftrro, onof bui'ir upon SCOTT& . Slaughter. European Our war is terrible. I know of a colonel who commanded a regiment of 1000 privates and lost half of them in one battle. Mexican That's nothing compared with our war. I know of one private who was commanded by 1000 generals and lost 750 of them In one battle. LIVE AGENTS For new Houselold Necessity. Easy seller. Big- profits. Exclusive territories open. BO MA SYSTEMS CO., Sedalia, Mo. The Turning Point. "Pf, what does it mean when a pub lic man is said to be at the zenith of his popularity?" "It means, my son," replied the de feated candidate ruefully, "that he is about ready to hit, the toboggan." Birmingham Age Herald. Xmas Packages.! Our package contains 88 piece, of Christmas and holiday nov- alrtoa,, Including post cards, folders, gift cards, stictteM, tags, seal and cutouts, making a representative-package which la a rare value at 10a. Jackson Co., 328. Cham, or Com., Portland, Ore. , a The Family. -' "I see that the Smiths have been divorced," remarked Brown. "That so?" asked Jones. "Did they have any family T" "Yes," replied Brown. "She gets the custody of the poodle and he gets the custody ot the motor car." Quick to Act. "Did Alice take her husband's fail ure in the right spirit?" "Oh, yes. Just as soon as she knew he was going under she went out and bought her .entire summer outfit." Endless Chain. "I don't see how that politician can Issue a statement every day." "Why not?" "What can he Issue a statement about?" "About bis last statement." Nothing Lost - The beauty ot reading a tiresome dook is that you can skip a few pages without realising the difference. The Neighbors Know It Evil communications corrupt good telephones. air, a ,r . i C Gee Wo fit meeMfa1 Wb J rvHMiikM ear till kinds of 41mnti of mm and womti with out txtoration, titwd from tho woadorful ChtiMaa hrbsv root buda and wtvubsM. which tr unknown to Ut Mdlcft. sctoneo of this Nun try. wnw for DttUiR and circultr. Su CONSULTATION FKKK, Adrhw Hie C Gee Wo Qbese Hefciu U 162 Mi Fir. 8t.. Portland. Of UtwUon Fkpor. NORTHWEST MARKET REPORTS; GENERAL CROP CONDITIONS Portland Wheat Bluestem, 96 Ko: fortyfold, 5c; club, 92Hc; red fife. sue; red itussian, nvc MUlfeed Spot prices: Bran,- $24 per ton; shorts, $2E; rolled barley, S3USJI31. v Corn White, $36 per ton; cracked, $37 per ton. Hay Eastern Oregon timothy, $15 16; valley timothy, $1213; alfalfa, $13.50014.60; cheat, $9 10; oats and vetch, tnwn. Vegetables Artichokes, 76c $1.00 per dozen; tomatoes, California, $1.00 W 1.50;. cabbage, 0c $1 hundred: garlic, 15o pound; peppers, 45c pound; eggplant, 6 10c per pound: sprouts, 9c per pound; horseradish, 8o per pound; cauliflower, 76q $1.25; celery, 6076o per - dozen: beans, 1012c; lettuce, $202.25 per crate; peas, lusjuic. Green Fruits Apples, 76c$1.76 per box," pears, il.OO01.6O per box: grapes, $11.60 per crate; casabas, 2e per pound; cranberries, $9 10 per Darrei. Potatoes Oregon, 90c $1.00: Yak- lmas, $1.50 per sack; sweets, $2.25 per hundred. Eggs Oregon ranch, buying prices: No. 1, 40c; No. 2. 30c: No. 3. 20o par dozen. . jobbing prices: No. 1, 42c; Oregon storage, 2628c. y Poultry Hens, 11013c: springs. 11 13c: turkeys, 17018c: turkeys. dressed, 2023c; ducks, white, 14c; colored, 12c; geese, 10llo. Butter City creamery, cubes, ex tras, selling at' 31c; firsts, 29c; prints and cartons, extra. Prices paid to producers: Country creamery, 24 28c, according to quality; butterfat, premium quality, 33c; No. 1, average quality, 81c; No. z, Z9o. veai Fancy, ac per pouna. , Pork Block, 7c per pound. -Hops 1915 crop, 9124c. ' . Wool Eastern Oregon. 1825c: Valley, 2526c; fall lambs' wool, 26c. Mohair Oregon, 28o per pound. Cascara Bark Old and new. 8Vi 4c per pound. Cattle Choice steers, $6.607: good, $606.25; medium, $5.2505.76; choice--oows, $55.60; good, $4,500 4.75; medium, $3.7504.25; heifers, $3.506; bulls, $34.60; stags, $4.50 6.26.- . .- - - -,i Hogs Light, $606.15; heavy, $50 5.15. . ; kttBj5iWetliers, $4.76 06.60; ewes, 406; lambs, $60?:BO:-: : ... . Large Decrease in Onion Crops. " The production this year In the 12 important pnlon-growlng states is es timated by the agricultural ' depart ment at 13,801,789 bushels, as com pared with 21,901,014 bushels in 1914, a decrease of about 37 per cent. The states included in this estimate are Massachusetts, New York, Ohio, Indi ana, Michigan, Wisconsin, Minnesota, Iowa, Colorado, Washington, Oregon and California. These states included about 59 per cent of the total onion acreage In the census year 1909. From the returns of special truck- crop reporters it is estimated that the per cent of acreage abandoned In 1916 in certain states because of blow-outs, floods, thrlps, blight, etc., was as fol lows: Massachusetts, 6.6 per cent; New York, 9.1 per cent; Ohio, 64.8 per cent; Indiana, 59.2 per cent; Michi gan, 8.6 per cent; Wisconsin, 5.6 per cent; Minnesota, 0.7 per cent; Iowa, 1.8 per cent; Colorado, 4.4 per cent; and California, .09 per cent Total for states considered, 23 per cent. From the same returns it is estim ated that the per cent of the onion crop that is of storage quality Is as follows: Massachusetts, 61 pef cent; New York, 44 per cent; Ohio, 17 per cent; Indiana, 30 per cent; Michigan, 46 per cent; Wisconsin, 75 per cent; Minnesota, 81 per cent; Colorado, 67 per cent; and California, 60 per cent Total for states considered, 46 per cent " ' 1 Wheat Buying Is Lighter. The country wheat market remains very firm, but buying has slowed down. No further export flour busi ness has developed beyond that pre viously reported, which stimulated more or less speculative buying f wheat Now the desire to take on supplies his subsided and operations by exporters have also been checked. Holders In the country, however, have not abated their strong views. - At the Portland merchants' ex change, the tendency was toward a lower level all around. November club bids were reduced 1 cent and fortyfold offers were H cent lower than the week before, and there was the same decline in other deliveries of white wheat, while red wheat was 1 to 2 cents lower on bid. - Bradstreets -estimates wheat and flour exports from the United St is this week at 10,238,000 bushels. Ar gentine wheat shipments this week were 84,000 bushels, against 96,000 bushels last week and 80,000 bushels a year ago. New Records In Foreign Trade. Washington. New high records in the foreign trade ot the United States continue to pile up the greatest fav orable trade balance this country has ever known, according to figures made public by the department of commerce. During the 12 months ended with October foreign trade exceeded $5, 000,000,000. Imports were $1,691,748, 013 and exports $3,318,634,636, as com pared with imports of $1,880,414,501 and exports of $2,140,847,829 during the same 12 months previous. Exports of October established a new high record, .rising to $334,638,- 678, which was $33,961,766 more than the former record made In September. October imports were $148,529,620. Heavy Trade In Green Produce. Portland. Trade is rushing In the fruit and vegetable district this week. There Is not only a heavy shipping demand In all lines, but local buying was largely Increased. The demand Is particularly good for apples, which are now selling better than at any time this season. Cranberries were also free sellers, and the trade in storage grapes was likewise good. A car, of head lettuce arrived from the south, and the steamer brought a mix ed assortment ot California vegetables. Industrial and Trade Activity. New York. Bradstreet's weekly re port says: "Further progress in trade accompanies greater Industrial acti vity, higher prices, better collections. Increased demand for money, record bank deposits, sharp reduction In un employment heavier payrolls, a big movement ot grain and lower temper aturea over a wide area, which latter has given snap to retail trade In sea sonable wearing apparel. Rain has helped winter wheat and cold weath er has put a period to cotton growth." TTSk ll.TtTaV xSV' FAMOUS E4STRY COOKS Baking Powder The patrons of our first class hotels and restaurants are exact ing they demand the best Women go where the pastry and cakes are noted for their excellence. Men are attracted by hot bread and biscuits when fresh and moist and light v The pastry cook with a reputation uses K C Baking Powder because he knows that results are certain; every time everything is as good as his best f . Then, too, with K C Baking Powder he can mix the various kinds of batter before the rush of the meal begins and bake as needed so that every order goes to the table fresh and hot yet the last ne DaKes are just, as good as me first -The reasons behind these reasons is that K C is really a blend of two baking powders. One commences to give off leavening gas as soon as moistened. The other requires both moisture and heat to make it active. Dough or batter will remain in a partially leavened condition for hours, and when put in the oven, . will come, up as light as if mixed a moment before. For cookies, pancakesoughiiuts and the like, which cannot all be baked at once, K C is indispensa ble. For all baking thedouble raise makes doubly certain. " Follow th example of the profemional ES ' cook and your baking will be equal to hie. nT Healthy, Strong , Beautiful Eyoi . Oculist ml PhvsrciHOB used Uurloo JCra Remedy m$uiy years before It was offered as Pomektle Eye Medicine. Murine Is Bt1t Oom pounded by Our Physicians and guaranteed by them as a Reliable Relief for Byes that Need Care. Try It id your Byes and In Baby's Eyes No Smartiuf-5ua Bye Comfort. Buy Murine of your Drorglst accept no Substitute, and If interented writs for Bolc of the Bye Free. HUKINBl fciYJC- BEMKIr CO., CiMCAUO BLACK LOSSES SURELY PttEVENTEl ay Cuttfr'a Blsokhe Pills. Low- pncea, iresn, rename: piwema ny Wnstern stoekuen because rhiy Bra test where stSsr vsesinsi JelL lj ST Writ, for boeklat and trntlmOBltls. I .I. ".W IO-,SMkss. BlsckHi Pills II.OS aUJSaaiX , SO. Son rktl. Blaeklii Pills 4.00 . Use any Injector, but Cutter's beat. The superiority of Cutter products Is tae to over at yean of specialising In vsMlnes ss, to?Jffie esly. . Insist en Cutter's. If unobtainable, order direct T'll OUTTES LABOSATORY, Berkeley, Callfsrsla wV- .Bullets and Juggernauts., . ; Chijiner--Tney slay that In" battle 100 bullets are Hred for -every one that takes effect. tj- Chauffeur- Very likely! I some times pass as many as 200 pedestrians before I hit one. -.1: Paw Knows Everything.' Willie Paw, is echo masculine or feminine? - . . Paw Feminine, my son. Echo al ways has the last word. Maw Willie,' ' you go and take a dose of castor oil. Unexpected. Bill Did you ever try to stand on an egg? - . - ... Jill Oh yes. "And what did you learn?" "That the inside of the egg was stronger than the outside." Philadel phia Record. Correct. ' Teacher (the subject being trees) Now, who can name the pine that has the longest and sharpest needles? Bright Boy I can, miss the porcu pine, - .-.-..-."'; . - . ., ' Competition Necessary.. "Jack, I wish you'd come' to see me occasionally." ' :' "Why, Vanessa, I thought you were engaged to Algernon Wombat?". ' "No; but . think I could be if I could get up a little brisk competi tion." ' ,- - . Fortified 8entlment " ,; if V'ls- your wife disappointed because , she tjidn't get the vote?" : "I don't think so. x The defeat of woman suffrage has merely strength ened her conviction that men are po litical- failures and serves to prolong the Interest of the campaign." Wash ington Star. ' The Test. -. ' Medium The spirit of your wife is here now. Do you wish to speak to her through me? Widower Ask her where the dickens she put my summer under wear. Philadelphia Public Ledger. - Superficiality. , She Phyllis Featherweight Is go ing to study geology. He Well, I am glad that she'll at last get beneath the surface of some thing. - , .; - : - Battery Troubles. . v First war fan Well, what are the Russians doing? ' Second war fan Well, they put the czar in the box and shifted the grand duke to right, field. - ... " ' .. , About, Due. "Young" lady, you are accused of giving a display of high kicking on Broadway." . ' "Nothing to it.your honor. I was Just trying to see the time of day by my ankle watch."' - ; : wjmmisrm SMOKELESS POWDER SHOTGUN SHELLS There are more "Leader" and'Eepeater" loaded shells used than any- other brand. Their superior shooting ia the reason why. , For pattern, penetration and uniformity they are unequalled. They hold all Important records and trophies. -ASKj.YOUR DEALER FOR THE BRAND. I LMjTTjrr IF, t Objected to Paying Twice. "Look here, waiter. Eighty cents is an outrageous price for a portion of asparagus." "Yes, sir, but you see, sir, we're put ting on a very expensive cabaret show, and " "I know all about the cabaret show. I paid for that with the soup." Kan sas City Times. . On Their Honeymoon. "Young, man," said the magistrate severely, "the assault you have com mitted on your poor wife was most brutal. Do you know of any reason why I should not send you to prison?" "If you do, your honor," replied the prisoner at the bar, hopefully, "it will break up our honeymoon." Philadel phia Ledger. . Boils Biliousness Malaria Are Yon Troubled? Constipation ) Dr. Rerce'sGcIden Medical Kscoyery Perhaps this ccae nay be aUallaT to yoars X WmUt Till .(Box 73.) Stlmm. CeL, sntftaar GanUefnenWlt rive, an, much pleasure to be abke tn send yoa testimonial, tf br Its reaching- Bona Bnfferer yoor toediciDee will do as much for hint as they have for ma. At tha aa of fourteen 1 waa troubled a grwt dMl with malaria and biliousness- aconmpanieol with tha worst sor-of larsa-boila. I waaperaoadedby my parmta, wbo hav always bean etrcr tHievera tn Dr. Pierce's maedfea, to try tha Gotdv-JB Medical DlKW7 I took one bottle and tha boils all dis appeared, but I did not atop at one bottlo. 1 took threa and tha malaria ail left mo and I have had no mora boils to this day, thank, to the 'Golden Medical womrj' for my relief. "Polkrwtnc an operaoao for apfwndteltbi two Man aco t was troubtad -Ten much with nnstioaUoo and I have bta trrlR, Dr. Pwra's Pkuant Purotiv. f-.lt. , Bd Umt ho rid aw of th. tmUMoaM Km and Hst. udMl n ta ranquer few ttn who!, troabl.: thanks asfmia for the 'IVIfets' and for the uh)-. 1 hav abtaHwd fro The Pwi-I. a Comaoa Sena. al.dfca.Ad-nar.H fiandaahr U ootaf this aaavs psa beak. for over fortv vears has been lending; its aid to just . such eases as this. In our - poeaession we have thou sands of testimonials of like character. Perhaps yon an skeptical, but isn't it worth at least a trial in view of such strong testimony? Isnt it reason able to suppose that if it has done so much for others it can do as much for yoa t - Tow dratirlst will B apply yoa In Ran id or tablet form, or you can sand GOona-aantMampafora trial boa. Addraa, Br. V.M.rva-ta, Bnflaha, K, T. Important. Teacher (relating an experience with a tramp) And then I fainted. Small Boy (excitedly) Wid yer light or wid yer left? r. n. u. No , uil 15 wrltlaaT to adrwliaws. tiea thio paper. 3