fTHE changer nay be critical and cause untold 1A suffering In after-life. The modern young ' women is often a "bundleof nerves" "hinh strumr" j- fainting spells emotional frequently blue and If V laissausnea witn me. oucn gins snouia oe neipea ml T I hOOn ! J over this distressing "stage in life by a woman'i W V tnrii. anJ na-vlnft that naa nr.wen enrwaaiil fn. ver,40.years.-- Dr. FicrceFavorite Prescription b a keen enemy to the physical weaknesses of woman. A medicine prepared by tegular graduated physician of unusuhexperience in treatingwoman sdiseases earatully adapted .to work in harmony NvHh the most delicate, feminine canaiitution ar-coated tablet form at the ri for a trial box, to Buffalo.. It b now obtainable in liquid 01 drag store or send 50 one-cent si i tVerr woman may writ fully and confidentially to Dr. Piarca and his staff of physician! and Specialists at tha Invalid!' Hotal and Surgical Institute, Buffalo, N. Y.,and maybe aure that liercase will receive care fal. consclenUous. confidential consideration, and that experienced medical advice will be given to her free. DR. PIERCE'S PLEASANT PELLETS ngulalm mrui aaefgerare sfomacA, livet eoiees. Smtmr moatmd, tim mranuima aoaj ru Lokm at cnJ. the WESCO SYSTEM of PENMANSHIP teaches you HOW TO WRITE. IT IS THE BEST. KnHK BEAUTIFULLY ILLUSTRATED BUVn Jg2 pACESi BY MAIL. 7Sc NEW HOTEL HOUSTON Dav Houston. Prop. H. B, Thoffnes, Mar. Thorough! modern. 101 Rooms of comfort. Mod rat Pricis. Three minutes' walk from Union' DpoL Write for ralea. 72 it Sink SL, POROAND, OX. WEEKS' BREAK-UP-A-COLD TABLETS A guaranteed remedy for Colds and La Grippe. Price 25c of your druggist. It'i good. Take nothhg else. Adv. HOWARD E. BTTBTOM - AMarer sntf Pnemlrt, Lesdvilie. Oolorudo. Spe'iimeu prices! iiuld. Silver. Ler,d tl. Gold, Silver. Jtai Gold. 60ot Zlno Bolted, lieterenoe: Oarbooate WatJ umplr ilooaill BNAPTHI81 Absolutely new, big profits: repeat order!. Leer Supply Co., College Place, Wash. . Lucky Editor , " "Is the editor In?" asked the man with the unbarbered hair and tho shiny coat as he fished a roll of piper from his pocket. "No," replied the office boy, "he baB Just gone out." "This is the third time I have called to see him," growled the caller, "and each time you have told me that lie has just gone out, What's the explan ation?" "I don't know," answered the office boy, "but I guess he must have been born under a lucky star." Lippln cott'a Magazine. Perfection Far Off. "So you went on record for prohibi tion" "Yes," replied the man with the an cient silk hat. "I'm ready to vote for It. But I can't help hoping that there will be a deadlock or an investigation or something to cause the usual de lay." Washington Star. . Naturally 80. "Airships are very expensive, are they not?" "Well, they make the money fly." New York Suu, A Long 8tretch. A very stout lady with a considerate nature, had cultivated the habit of buying two seats when she proposed to visit a theater. In this manner she always hoped to remain in comfort without annoying anyone by overlapping. On one occasion sno nanaea an at tendant two tickets as usual. The attendant scrutinized them, then looked at her, Who is going to occupy the otner Beat, madam?" I am going to occupy them both, sir!" retorted the lady, indlgnautly. Very good, ma am, but the seats are on each Bide of the aiBle!" Philadel phia Record. ., . Degeneration of the House. No lokes are better appreciated than those that are made unwittingly by sober-minded men. Not long ago a solemn member of congress from Iowa was holding forth in that body In a pessimistic strain about what he felt to be a great fall ing off in the cha.cter and standing of that august body. "Since I came Into this house rour years ago," he announced with the ut most gravity, "the confidence of the publio in it has much diminished." Philadelphia Public Ledger. IF YOUR CHILD IS CROSS, FEVERI8H, CON8TIPATED If Japan keeps on wanting to send an army to Europe what will happen? Answer: juey may jet uer. WHY GRIP IS DANGEROUS. T 1. LOIr.'rm L-.-i.: JMXmvprTK :: .1-1 a.1 bM All It requires a good tonlo laxative to keep the body of the patient as strong as possible to counteract the effect of the poisons oreated by the grip bacil lus. An expectorant tonlo with some laxative qualities Is the safest rem edy. Such is Peruna. Mrs. Gentry Gates, 8211) First Ave., Hast Lake, Ala., writes: "I had a bad case of grip. I tried Feruna and It cured me. I can safely say It Is a fine medicine." Mr. George E, Law, 134 N. Frank lin St., Brazil, Ind., writes: "I am satisfied that Peruna la a wonderful remedy for grip, and I do most heart ily endorse and recommend It." Most Skin Trouble Readily Overcome a he Active Principle or a Famous Remedy Works Wonders. Hear people haro marveled the way m. B. B. overcome! skin troubles. The ex- Elanatlon Ii the fact that 8. 8. S. works t the blood sud. the btood la really a most latrleate and extraordinary maaa of arteries and veiui. Wbea you coma to reallte that the skin and tha flesh beneath are composed of a eetwork of tiny blood vessels you solve the mystery. - There ere wonderful medicinal properties (a B. B. a. that follow tha course of the blood streams Just ai naturally as Uia uioat aourlalilug food alemeuta. It la really a remarkable remedy. It soatalne oue Ingredient, the active purpose af which la to stimulate the tissues to the healthy aeleciloa of Its own essential nutri ment. And the medicinal alemeuta of this matcblesa blood purltler are Juat aa essen tial to wetl-batauced health aa the autrt- Ueus elements of the meata, grains, fata tad sugars of our dally food. Not one drop of minerals or drugs Is used lta preparation. Ask for B. H. 8. and lust Insist upon having It. And If you de lire akinnil advice and counsel upon any matter concerning the blood and skin, write to tha tledloal Department, The Swift Specific Co.. 6it Swift Bldg., Atlanta, Oa. Da not allow aome gealoua clerk's elo- Sneace over something "Just aa good" aa . 8. 8. to fool you with tha same old mineral aruga. ueware OK all euuauiuiee. Wist npoa U. B. 0. r. N. O. . No., Mil WK wrltlac to (.ivertlseta, please sh ttea this paper. : : Companion Available. "They say the theatrical business Is bad" said a man from the west in a New York cafe. "If that's so I'd like to see it when It's good just out of curiouslty. I went to a place where they sell theater tickets today and asked for one seat for a certain hit The young woman behind the counter informed me smilingly that the best she could do was two In the balcony at $4 each. 'But,' I protested, 'I need only one. I haven t anybody to taice with me.' She gave me another smile. Mv sister isn't doing anything to night.' she said. 'Unless It Is staying at home,' I said. Now, what do you know about that?" VOIIR OWN DHUGGIST WILL tell you Try Murine Rye Ketneily for Red, Weak, Watery jsyes ana uranuiateu nyeiiuH, n Dinaruua dst.tte uomiort. write lor uuoa 01 nie aye y mall Free, at urine Eye Remedy Co., Chicago. Look Mother! If tongue It coated, cleanse little bowels with "Cali fornia Syrup of Figs." Mothers can rest easy after giving "California Syrup of Figs," because in a few hours all the clogged-up waste, sour bile and fermenting food gently moves out of the bowels, and you have a well, playful child again. Sick children needn't be coaxed to take this harmless "fruit laxative." Millions of mothers keep it handy be cause they know its action on the stomach, liver and bowels Is prompt and sure. Ask your druggist for a BO-cent bot tle of "California Syrup of Figs," which contains directions for babies, children of all ages and for grown-ups, Shoe Store. "I supopse you meet many kinds of people." "No, they re all alike, said the shoe clerk. "Every woman who comes In here thinks she's a Cinderella." Pittsburgh Post. There are rumors of a flanking movement in this fierce ham war now In progress. Is he a publio benefactor the man who makeB two small loaves ot bread grow where one large one grew before? The street car company officials seem to be suffering from acute Jit-neyitla. They are adding to the furniture at Washington. President Wilson sup plements his cabinet by a round table. Vegetation may he hurt hv wnr operations, but the wireless plant continue to nourish, The river Seine is on a rampage. In other words the Seine appears most Insane. A man, quite a bit ot a jingo, Was sent down to Sunto Domingo; When the senate got pryln'. It landed on Bryan, And dug up the hot stuff. By Jingol A woman's Jaw was dislocated by a ail. A lot ot henpecked husbands would like to know where that Icy spot Is. Watch your gold coin Is a warning being sent out. What's the use when It's all going out and nothing coming In? An Implement firm is conducting a caterpillar school. However, the Aus tralian crawl la not part of uie course. Down in Texas they are placing a bounty on stork visitations. Allee same coyotes and other night-bowlera. What will become of the grand sport of skeelng when all the wbl skees are banned from the atate? BAVK YOUFI HORSES From Dlatemner. Mountain Favor, and all ttier forma of Contusion by uslngspohn'e Distemper Compound. I'ut oil the tongue or in uia reea. tmie nt au times tor an ngea and sexea, under all conditions. Same for Dog Dlatempor and Chli-ken cholera. Acta 011 the Mood, expeia the germa. lte movea wurms from atomaoh and Intes tines. A fine tonlo and Aooetlser. Ab solutely atife, even for human beings Over 1,0011,000 bottles sold last year. Ureuteet cure and preventive ever known for Coiitagloua dlaeueea. Nearly every one knows Spohn's. Over 18 years on tha mama!, nave you uaea una great rem edy? Why not? It la not an experiment. Try It: ba convinced: let "Spohn'a" help you lava and make money. All wholeaale drugglata handle It. Your home drugglat can aupniy you, or write to manui&ctur era, with price encloaed. A .bottle. 60o. and 11.00: f&.oo and 110.00 tha doaen. l.oca.1 agents wanted. Spohn Medical Co., Cloaueu, lud., U. U. A. ' Newrangiea. A steam launch belonging to a Brit ish battleship recently sprang a leak while crossing from Portsmouth and rapidly sank. Nearby an old salt was leisurely rowing a boat, but he made no attempt to come to the rescue. The launch's crew managed to swim to the boat, and as they scrambled in one of them said to the boatman: "Why on earth didn't you give us a hand? Did n't you see we were sinking?" "Lor' bless yer," said the boatman stolidly, "I thought yer craft was one o' those blessed submarines!" Phil adelphia Public Ledger. A Puzzle. The lady of the house was explain ing things to the new maid. "An' what's this, missus?" asked the girl, Indicating a metal bottle. "That is a bottle which will keep things either hot or cold, whichever you desire," replied the mistress. "Well, foh the land sake!" ejaculat ed the girl. "How Is it gwine to know whether you want things hot or cold?" Philadelphia Chronicle-Telegraph. Conservation. Moe Rose They say women lose more than 60,000,000 hairpins every year. Joe Cose Yes. And it is such a waste of our natural resources that they are talking conservation by mak ing wireless hairpins. Browning's Magazine. RESINOL WILL SURELY STOP THAT ITCHING What blessed relief! The moment reslnol ointment touches itching skin, the itching stops and healing begins. That is why doctors have prescribed it successfully for nineteen years In even the severest, stubbornest cases of eczema, ringworm, rashes and many other tormenting, unsightly skin dis eases. With the help of warm baths with reslnol soap, reslnol oihtment re stores the skin or scalp to perfect health and comfort, quickly, easily and at little cost. At all druggists. Adv. Virtue Not Rewarded. Willie came tiome from school cry ing bitterly. "Mother," he sobbed, "I'm not going to try and be good any more." 'Why Willie, whatever is the mat ter?" inquired his mother. "Boo! hoo!" sobbed Willie. " I was in school today and I I saw Teddy Smith put a bent pin in the t-teacher's chair, and because I did not want teacher to sit on the p-ln I I pulled his chair away, and he sat on the floor. He gave me a thrashing for pulling his chair away when he got up, and when I got outside the school Teddy Smith hit me for pulling the pin a away and not mindin' my own b-bus- iness.' London Tit-Bits. END STOMACH TROUBLE, GASES OR DYSPEPSIA "Pape'a Dlapepsin" makes Sick, Sour, Gassy Stomachs surely feel Tine in five minutes. It what you just ate Is souring on your stomach or lies like a lump of lead, refusing to digest, or you belch gas, and eructate sour, undigested food, or have a feeling of dizziness, heartburn, fullness, nausea, bad taste in mouth and stomach-headache, you can get blessed relief in five minutes. Put an end to stomach tiouble forever by getting a large fifty-cent case of Pape's Dlapepsin from any drug store. You realize in five minutes how need less it is to suffer from Indigestion, dyspepsia or any stomach disorder. It's the quickest, surest stomach doc tor In the world. It's wonderful. A Puzzle. . "The soldiers who use noiseless rifles, pa " "Well, my son?" "How can they make reports?" Baltimore American. Unpleasant Constraint. ' Teacher Johnny, can you decline to eat? Johnny Yes'm, I can, but I don't like to. Comic Cuts. Her Charms. "I suppose you meet many kinds ot people." "No, they're all alike," said the shoe clerk. "Every woman who comes In here tlilnkB Bhe's a Cinderella." Pittsburgh Post. v Happy. "There goes a happily married couple." "That so?" "Yep. Neither of 'em cares for the modern dances." Detroit Free Press. Neuralgia There is no need to suffer the annoying, excruciating pain of neuralgia; Sloan's Liniment laid on gently will soothe the aching head like mag to. Don't delay. Try it at onoo. Hew WUl Other Say "I hare been a eufferer with Nfnraltta for -Tori yetvra ui have tried different Liatmeata. out Bloan'a Un intent it the bt Liniment for NvurttlK-a on earth. 1 have tried it tuccemfuiLy; it hM never " f. ii. ItUhaat, Augtuta, AM. Mr$. Rut C. CfaviMot, Indtpmdeni IVe., vrit: "A (need of our told ua about your Linimrot. We have been using it for 13 yeare and thiok there is nothing like It We use it on everything, nw, euta, borna. bmiars, core throat, headache and on ereryuunf eiet. n e ean get along without . nei think U it the best SLOAN'S UNIMENT is the beet remedy for rheumatism, backache, sore throat and sprains. At all dealers. Me, Send lour cents in stamps lee a I TRIAL BOTTLE Dr. Earl S. Sloan, Inc. Dept-B. Philadelphia. Pa. I NORTHWEST MARKET REPORTS. Portland JAI1 wool men agree that the coming season will be the most interesting, and perhaps exciting, that the Western markets have seen in many years.. Beyond this they will make no prediction. Prices, of course, will be good, but whether they will be high, or how high, no one cares to guess. A dealer needs a brave speculative disposition to undertake forward busi ness in the face of the conditions this year. . Nevertheless it Is said con tracting has been done to a consider able extent in Utah and it is also re ported that some contracts have been signed around Arlington. The terms were not mentioned, nor could the re ports be verified. Sheep growers are confident that prices will go to a high range and some of them are talking of a 26 or 30-cent market. With stocks in America as4low as they are and spot prices here and abroad continually ad vancing, there is no doubt the 1915 market will open very strong, but buy ers are not willing to concede that farmers will get the prices they are expecting. The demand for eggs was better the latter part of the week, and receipts cleaned up quickly. Oregons were held at 32 cents, case count, and 88 ecnts candled. Wheat business came to a stop in the local market this week, and for the first time this year there were no sales on the Merchants Exchange. Most of the dealers evidently had nothing to offer, and those with a sup ply on hand wanted too much for it. Bids for most deliveries were ad vanced from half a cent, to 1) cents, while asking prices were generally 1 to 2 cents above bids, and in the case of prompt bluestem the spread was 8 cents. Arrivals of poultry and meats were moderate and prices were steady and unchanged. Butter and cheese moved at last quotations. . Wheat Bid: Bluestem, $1.45; forty fold, $1.44; club, $1.42(; red Russian, $1.86; red Fife, $1.88. Oats No. 1 white feed, $36.60. Barley No. 1 feed, $32.60; brew ing, $42.50; bran, $30.25; shorts, $31. Millfeed Spot prices : Bran, $30 81; shorts, $3232.50; rolled barley, $34.5035.50. Corn White, $36 ton; cracked, $37. Hay Eastern Oregon timothy, $14 16; valley timothy, $12.50; grain hay,'t$1012; alfalfa, $1213. Vegetables Cucumbers, hothouse, $22.25 dozen; peppers, $4 crate; ar tichokes, 8590c dozen; cabbage, li l(c pound; celery, $2.60 crate; cauliflower, $2.25; sprouts, 8c per pound; pumpkins, lie; squaBh, lie; carrots, $1.25 sack; beets, $1.25; parsnips, $1.25. Green Fruits Apples, 75c$1.60 box; casaba, $1.65 crate; pear, $1 1.50; cranberries, $911 barrel. ' Potatoes, 21c pound. Onions Oregon, buying price, $1.25 f. o. b. shipping point. Eggs Fresh Oregon ranch, case count, 82c; candled, 83c. Poultry Hens, 12c pound; mixed, llUlc; broilers, 1820c; turkeys, dressed, 21c; live, 18c; ducks, 14 16c; geese, 1214c. Butter Creamery, prints, extras, 32c pound in case lots; ic more in less than ease lots; cubes, 2627c. Pork Block, 8J9s pound. Veal Fancy, 12i13e pound. Hops 1914 crop, 1012ic; 1918 crop, nominal. Hides Salted, 14c; salted bulls, 10c; Baited kip, 15c; salted calf, 19c; green hides, 13c; green bulls, a9c; green kip; 15c; green calf, 19c; dry hides, 26c; dry calf, 28c. Wool Valley, 1718c; Eastern Oregon, 1520c, nominal; mohair, 1914 clip, 27ic . Cascara bark Old and new, 44Jc pound. Cattle Prime steers? $7.6O8.00; choice, $7.257.50; medium, $6.76 7.25; choice cows, $66.80; medium, $56; heifers, $5(3)7; bulls, $3.606; stags, $4.606. Hogs Light, $6.266.80; heavy, $5.266. Sheep Wethers, $5.766.65; ewes, $55.75; lambs, $6.257.80. Tacoma Apples Green cooking, 50c box; Spitzenbergs, Winesaps, Rome Beauties, Arkansas Blacks, Staymen Winesaps and Black Twigs, 75((i85c box; Delicious, $1.651.75. Cider 80c gallon; Oregon, $3 keg, 25c gallon. Comb honey Yakima, $3.26 crate; strained honey, $5.60; Idaho, $3.50; Nevada, $3.60. . Pears Yakima, $1.60 box. Cranberries, $8.2511. Vegetables Cabbage, home-grown. He pound; carrots, local, 76c$l; beets, home-grown, 76c$l; turnips, $1.86; potatoes, Yakima, $2223 ton; White River, $1718; Burbanks, $22; onions, green, 20c dozen; Oregon brown onions, $1.75 2; Yakima, $1.60; garlic, 15c pound; radishes, local, 20c dozen bunches; parsley, 40c dozen bunches; lettuce, head, 60c dozen bunches, $2 crate; spinach, local, 5c pound; cucumbers, $1.502 dozen; celery, 6076c dozen, $3 crate; green peppers, 25e pound; eggplant, 10c; Hubbard squash, 2ac; rutabagas, $1.75 sack; cauliflower, $2.60 crate; arti chokes, 90c dosen; Brussels sprouts, 8c pound; rhubarb, 6c pound. Fresh Meats Steers, 12 Jc; cows, 12c; heifers, 1212(c; wethers, 12ic; dressed hogs, 12c; trimmed sides, 16Jc; combinations, 15Jc; lambs, 13 14c; Diamond T. C 14c; yearlings, 13c, ewes, 11c Poultry Ducks, live, 1012c; hens, dressed, 16 18c; live, 10 14c; springs, dressed, 22c; live, 1416c; squabs, live, $2.60 dozen; dressed, $6; turkeys, live, 18c; dressed, 2830c; geese, 20c Butter Washington creamery, 80 81c; Oregon. 2627e. Eggs Fresh ranch, 80c; local cold storage, 2326; Eastern 2326c Seattle Wheat Bluestem; $1.46; Turkey red, $1.41; forty fold. $1.44; club, $1.48; Fife, $1.89; red Russian, $1.86; barley, $32.75.ton. .. r .h,.,.a Lminnr tt&A: an irm OaiOUA. SMS. . '"V I la Utt as scraS.lxar'BCabbaa brought taut aoacraOaJoaajiaaa. aaatol latfiSatllM VSIHWini m " . erbM AUm mmhill-ri his hosts st Kadroa, ha satectsd but 900 QT7ALTTT saan n was udlrm oo. for 11 uiut. onr bhr Ssed Cataloirus fraa. Trtth ons generous package aacai null. Pint SutTOsb'SJel " 0"J! SrljrO..Jl.r! snstiBaekases for but lie. coatalas enough seedtosupplr you wita rich, faJQr Head Ul4 KM KltT rvUUO Rlivj-t lurwvmx . aor . w IMPORTANT THAT PUBLIC SHOULD KNOW ABOUT GREAT KIDNEY REMEDY. The testimonial I am to give you comes unsolicited I have been suffer ing from lumbago for ten years and at times was unable to stand erect A Mr. Dean of this city, Baw me in my condition (bent over) and inquired the cause. I told him that I had the lumbago. He replied, "If you get what I tell you to, you need not have it" I said I would take anything for ease. He said, "You get two bottles of Dr. Kilmer's Swamp Root and take it, and If it does not fix you O. K. I will pay for the medicine myself." I did so and am a well man. For five months I have been as well as could be. Be fore I took your Swamp-Root was In constant pain day and night. This may look like advertising, but it seems to me most important that the public should be made familiar with this treatment as It is the only one I know which is an absolute cure. I owe a great deal to Dr. Kilmer's Swamp Root, and am anxious that others sit uated as I was should know and take advantage of it. Hoping that this testimonial may be of benefit to some one, I am, J. A. HOWLAND, 1734 Humboldt St., Denver, Col. State of Colorado City and County of Denver ss. Personally appeared before me, a Notary Public in and for the city and county ot the State of Colorado, J. A. Howland, known to me as the person whose name is subscribed to the above statement and upon his oath declares that it Is a true and correct statement DANIEL H. DRAPER, Notary Publio. Scraps. Turkey last year produced 25,000 bags of canary seed. There are oportunltles now for American goodB in the Caucasus re gion. The Italian government uses Amer ican machinery to manufacture shoes for its Boldiers. Cotton sed hulls are now being used extensively lr.Btead of hay and straw for the packing of glassware. Japanese are producing more man 20,000,000 tons of coal a year from mines in Japan and South Manchuria. Wealthy Parisians have bought an entire block of houses in that city and will tear them down to hunt for Ko man and Gothic treasures. The number of British postoffice employes now serving In the naval or military forces of Great Britain amounts to more than 20,000. A local thunderstorm and blasting operations on a new street railway in England were responsible for two ru mors of naval battles. Salubite a new explosive, is 50 times more powerful than dynamite, and Is much safer, for it will explode only by means ot a percussion cap. A cargo ot salmon recently shipped out of Vancouver consisted of 6,000, 000 cans, valued at $500,000 whole sale. Laid end to end, the cans would reach a distance ot 452 miles. Letter to Dr. Kilmer & Co., Blnghamton, N.Y. Prove What Swamp-Root Will Do for You Send ten cents to Dr. Kilmer & Co., Blnghamton, N. Y., for a sample size bottle. It will convince anyone. .You will also receive a booklet of valuable information, telling about the kidneys and bladder. When writing, be sure and mention this paper. Regular fifty-cent and one-dollar size bottles for sale at all drug stores. Our Own Popular Ballads. A working girl lived In a flat that looked out on the court; She loved her finnan haddie, though she wasn't any sport The fumes that rose from Nelly's flat 'bout 6 o'clock each night, Were pungent, penetrating and they brought about a tight "Cut out the honey odors," yelled a mean old man next door, And as the Janitor approached they made an awful roar. "Who's cooking fish for supper?" cried a woman with a grouch, "This, ain't no Friday feast day. Do vou get me? I'm no slouch." But Nelly faced them calmly, as she sauntered through the hall, And as aromas wafted 'round, she warbled to them all: . Chorus: "I may not suit your sniffers, but I know what s good to eat, My fish may be quite smelly, but thank God! Im pure and sweet; You guys can eat your sauerkraut and cabbage, If you wlsn, But, heaven will protect the girl who works to buy her Usui ' Sorrows of Song. "The old songs used to talk about unrequited affection," said the bald headed man. "Yes. Somebody was supposed to be heartbroken about something all the time." "There's no danger of heart trouble with these up-to-date songs. The only risk you run Is that they will make you catch your breath till you get asthma. Washington star. Bonds Are Light. "And are the divorce laws bo very liberal in your sections? "Liberal? Say! they are so liberal that nobody ever beard of a woman crying at a wedding out there." De troit Journal. Not In His Class. Angry employer Do you mean to contradict me? You haven't as much sense as a donkey. Clerk No sir, I don't pretend to set my opinion against yours. Boston Transcript A Mental Feat "Girls and photographers have one paradoxical quality in common. "What Is that?" "Both can give a positive negative.1 Baltimore American. A Bad One. At the menagerie "Is this animal amphibious?" "Amphibious as a Hon, ma'am. He wud bite ye In a minute. Lite. The Reason. "It seems to me they are getting on very badly with that Chinese lantern decoration. "Well, naturally, my dear, that Is a sort of thing which is always banging fire. Baltimore American. The Proof of It Blinks Jones is a financial genius. Jinks What makes you think that? Blinks He can make, money with or without going into bankruptcy. Philadelphia Ledger. 10 CENT "CASCARETS" FOR LIVER AND BOWEL8 Cure Sick Headache, Constipation, Biliousness, Sour Stomach, Bad Breath Candy Cathartic No odds how bad your liver, stom ach or bowels; how much your bead aches, how miserable you are from constipation, indigestion, biliousness and sluggish- bowels you always get relief with Cascareta. They imme diately cleanse and regulate the stom ach, remove the sour, fermenting food and foul gases; take the excess bile from the liver and carry off the con stipated waste matter and poison from the Intestines and bowels. A 10-cent box from your druggist will keep your liver and bowels clean; stomach sweet and head clear for months. They work while you sleep. Dangers of Disguise. "Did your children recognize yon when you played Santa Claus last year?" "I hope not If they did It was very rude of them to keep on referring to me as the funny little fat man with the sqfleaky voice."-Washington Star. Constioation causes many serious diseases. It is thoroughly cured by Doctor Pierce's Pleasant reliefs, une a laxative, three for cathartic. His Favorite. A country clergyman on his round of visits interviewed a youngster as to his acquaintance with Bible stories. 'My lad," he said, you nave, oi course, heard of the parables?'' ' "Yes, sir," shyly answered the poy, whose mother had instructed him in sacred history. "Yes, sir." 'Good!" said the clergyman. "Now, which ot them do you like the best of all?" The boy squirmed, but at last heed ing his mother's frowns, he replied: I guess I like that one where some body. 'loafs and fishes.'" Advance. Remarks by One's Neighbors. After nearly every marriage the neighbor women offer gratuitous in sult to the groom by Baying: "And her mother had such high ambitions for her daughter!" Exchange. Investigating Stars. The classification of the stellar spectra as- being carried on by Har vard university, is a vast one, entail ing investigation and recording ot 200,000 stars. The government will provide 4000 goats for firefighters. The govern ment gets everybody s so easily It ought to raise the number all right His Predicament Absent-Minded Man Darn it! Four times I carried my wife's letter and forgot to mail It Now that I remem ber It, I've forgotten the letter. Phil adelphia Ledger. On The Market Stern Parent So you want my daughter, huh! Got any money? Suitor Yes, sir. How high do you quote her? Boston Transcript The average man shudders when he sees those lurid Yuletide cravats in the shop windows. on nnnn No uun Compromise You must conquer Stomach Ills at once if you would retain the . con trolling power in health matters. Such ailments as Poor Appetite, In digestion, Biliousness, Constipation, Colds and Grippe soon undermine your health. Help Nature conquer them with the valuable aid of - HOSTETTER'S Stomach Bitters y o D rj Eight Presidents Serve Mexico In . Less Than Five Years. The flight ot Provisional President Gutierrez from Mexico City opens the way for the eighth president Mexico has had since 1911. The list follows: Porfirio Diaz, abandoned presidency May, 1911. - Francisco de la Barra, provisional president May to December, 1911. Francisco Madero, president, De cember, 1911, to February, 1913. Victoriano Huerta, provisional pres ident, February, 1913, to July, 1914. E. Carbajal, provisional president, July-August 1914- Venustiano Carranza, provisional president, August, 1914, and still claims title. ; Eulalio Gutierrez, November, 1914 January, 1916. Roque Gonzales Garza. Next For Points Only. "Shall I put a little more brandy in the punch?" asked the host "No," replied the hostess. "Be con tent to leave it as a punch. Don't make it a knock-out." Washington Star. His Fault Mr. Slowboy (calling on girl) You seem er rather distant this evening. -The girl Well, your chair Isn't nail ed down, is it? Boston Transcript Not Good Looking. Diner (critically) This isn't a very good-looking piece of meat. Waiter Well, you ordered a plain gteaa. Boston xranscnyt. Horrors I The tea shops in Petro grad have shut down because ot the scarcity of water. Reliable evidence is abundant that women are constantly being restored to health by Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound The many testimonial letters that we are continually pub lishing in the newspapers hundreds of them are all genu ine, true and unsolicited expressions of heartfelt gratitude for the freedom from suffering that has come to these women solely through the use of Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound. Money could not buy nor any kind of influence obtain such recommendations; you may depend upon it that any testimonial we publish is honest and true if you have any doubt of this write, to the women whose true names and addresses are always given, and learn for yourself- Read this one from Mrs. Waters: Cahden, N. J. I was sick for two years with nervous spells, and my kidneys were affected. I had a doctor all the time and used a galvanic) battery, but nothing did me any good. I was not able to go to bed, but spent my time on a couch or in a sleeping-chair, and sooa became almost a skeleton. Finally my doctor went away for his health, and my husband heard of Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound and got me some. In two months I got relief and now I am like a new woman and am at my usual weight. I recommend your medicine to every one and so does my husband." Mrs. Tima Watibs, 630 Mechanic Street, Camden, N. J. From Hanover, Penn. Hanovir, Pa. "I was a very weak woman and suffered from bearing down pains and backache. I had been married over four years and had no children. Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound proved an excellent remedy for it made me a well woman. After taking a few bottles my pains disappeared, and we now have one of the finest boy babies you ever saw." Mrs. C. A. Kioesodb, ItFJ), Ho. 6, Ilanover, Pa. Now answer this question if you can. Why should a woman continue to suffer without first giving Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound a trial ? You know that it has saved many others -why should it fail in your case? For SO years Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound has been the standard remedy for fe male Ills. No one sick with woman's ailments does justice to herself if she does not try this fa mous medicine made from roots and herbs, it bas restored so many suffering women to health. f"yaWriteto I.TDU E.PIXKH AS JfEDICITE CO. (COSWDESTIAL) ITSS, MASS., for advice. Your letter will be opened, reaxl and answered by a wouma and held in strict cvnlideuco.